| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | His name is Archie Decoste, | 这孩子名唤阿奇·德克斯 |
| [00:02] | age 22, total years spent in high school: seven. | 年方22 高中怒读七年 |
| [00:06] | SAT score: zero. | SAT勇夺零分 |
| [00:08] | And he was recently arrested for selling marijuana | 最近因为在警局向警察兜售大麻而被捕 |
| [00:11] | to a police officer at a police station. | 最近因为在警局向警察兜售大麻而被捕 |
| [00:13] | So, you want us to help you recruit this idiot | 你要我们帮你招这个二货入学 |
| [00:16] | instead of an honors student or a science genius? | 而不是好学生或者科学天才吗 |
| [00:19] | Do we go to the same Greendale? | 我们读的是同一家大学吗 |
| [00:20] | Ah, but let me reveal the fortune inside this cookie. | 这其中妙处 且听我细细道来 |
| [00:24] | Family net worth: $8 million. | 家族资产净值 八百万 |
| [00:27] | Ladies and gentlemen, this is what we | 乡亲们 这就是咱社区大学招生游戏里 |
| [00:30] | in the community college recruiting game call a “whale.” | 传说中的”大头鲸”啊 |
| [00:33] | The perfect mix of low intellect, | 此人完美融合了低智商 |
| [00:36] | high lack of ambition, and limitless parental support. | 低志向 还有爹娘老子无尽的宠溺支持 |
| [00:39] | So, a rich dumb-dumb who will never graduate | 所以 这二货多金低能永远毕不了业 |
| [00:42] | and keep dropping money into the school indefinitely. | 把钱源源不断地投进学校的口袋 |
| [00:44] | Got it. | 了解 |
| [00:45] | Is there really that much money in this, dean, | 真的会有这么多钱吗 院长 |
| [00:46] | Or is it like that endorsement deal | 还是说这只是 |
| [00:48] | you made with Let’s Potato Chips? | 你和”乐吃”薯片签的代言协议 |
| [00:49] | If you don’t like the crispy-licious taste of Let’s, | 如果你不喜欢”乐吃”香脆可口的味道 |
| [00:52] | feel free to eat that other greasy brand. | 就尽管吃那些高油脂的牌子好了 |
| [00:55] | Splingles? Not this guy. | “四品客”吗 肯定不会的 |
| [00:57] | Thank you, Troy, | 多谢 特洛伊 |
| [00:58] | And, I will explain the value of this whale | 就让我以你们身边的某条”大头鱼”为例 |
| [01:02] | by describing one who’s been swimming right under your nose. | 来好好解释这条”大头鲸”的价值 |
| [01:05] | Pierce Hawthorne has taken 80% | 格林德尔80%的课程 |
| [01:08] | of Greendale’s classes more than twice. | 皮尔斯·霍桑都上过两遍以上 |
| [01:11] | He is the only Greendale student who has ever paid for | 他是全校学生中唯一一个掏钱购买了 |
| [01:14] | a premium locker or the extended pencil warranty. | 加长储物柜和铅笔延期保修服务 |
| [01:17] | Pierce cannot know about this. | 这事不能让皮尔斯知道 |
| [01:19] | He’s a big baby who throws tantrums | 他就是个老小孩 一看到大家关注别人 |
| [01:21] | when anyone else gets attention. | 他就会大哭大闹 |
| [01:23] | Remember when Kerri Strug visited our campus? | 还记得克里·斯特鲁格来我们学校那次吗 |
| [01:26] | – That was horrible. – That was awful. | -不堪回首 -惨不忍睹 |
| [01:27] | I have scheduled Archie’s visit for tomorrow | 我已经安排了阿奇明天来校参观 |
| [01:30] | when Pierce has no classes. | 明天皮尔斯没课 |
| [01:32] | Guys, I’m asking, | 各位 我谨在此 |
| [01:34] | as treasurer of the Forensics Club. | 以法鉴社团会计的身份求大家帮忙 |
| [01:36] | The dean said we could use some of the whale money | 院长说我们可以用”大头鲸”的钱兴建 |
| [01:37] | for a new body farm. | 一个尸研所[研究尸体降解] |
| [01:39] | Who wants to help? | 谁想帮忙 |
| [01:40] | I’m in. Sounds like a romper. | 算我一个 听着挺带劲 |
| [01:41] | We do need money. | 我们的确需要钱 |
| [01:42] | The biology department’s been dissecting | 生物系对着一头死猪 |
| [01:44] | the same dead pig for ten years. | 足足解剖了十年 |
| [01:46] | If we land this kid, | 如果把这孩子招进来 |
| [01:48] | we can buy 100 dead pigs | 就能买100头死猪 |
| [01:49] | and make everybody happy. | 人人皆大欢喜 |
| [01:51] | I’ll help where I can, | 我也愿意帮忙 |
| [01:51] | but I started a new PE class. | 但我新报了一门体育课 |
| [01:53] | I’ve been avoiding it for three years, | 三年来我一直都在回避这门课 |
| [01:54] | but you can’t run from running forever. | 但躲得过初一躲不过十五 |
| [01:56] | I’m in PE too. | 我也在上体育课 |
| [01:57] | I made room in my trophy case. | 我家里的奖杯柜还特意给它留了位置 |
| [01:59] | Then, I remembered classes don’t give out trophies, | 但我又想起来上课不会发奖杯 |
| [02:01] | so I put a fishbowl there instead. | 所以我就在那放了个鱼缸 |
| [02:03] | It’s been quite the week. | 这周过得真郁闷 |
| [02:05] | So, the rest of us will have to pick up the slack, | 那么剩下的人就该干嘛干嘛去 |
| [02:07] | and, yes, Jeffrey, I assume you’re out, | 是的 杰夫瑞 我不会将你算进来 |
| [02:10] | because of your track record of literally | 因为你在学校的表现一向 |
| [02:12] | being too cool for school. | 风流倜傥 格格不入 |
| [02:14] | Actually, you can count me in on this one. | 事实上 你这次可以把我算进来 |
| [02:16] | What? | 什么 |
| [02:17] | You had me at “No Pierce.” | “无皮尔斯”这一点让我动了心 |
| [02:19] | He’s been all over me lately to hang out. | 他最近一直缠着我叫我出去玩 |
| [02:21] | It’s weird. | 相当诡异 |
| [02:22] | You just want to be a part of something. | 你不过是想成为集体的一份子 |
| [02:24] | Admit it, Thanksgiving softened that Winger underbelly. | 承认吧 感恩节让翁格变得有爱多了 |
| [02:27] | Ugh, Britta. | 布雷塔 |
| [02:30] | Now, let’s set sail and hunt that whale! | 现在让我们扬帆起航 去猎捕大头鲸吧 |
| [02:33] | – Yeah. – Hey, let’s do that. | -很好 -说走咱就走哇 |
| [02:36] | You know what the commercial says. | 你晓得广告是怎么说的 |
| [02:37] | “Keep your damn hands off my Let’s.” | 我的”乐吃” 伸爪的去屎 |
| [03:09] | Hey, Jeff. | 杰夫 |
| [03:11] | I was thinking we could swing by this great barbershop I know. | 我想我们可以去我知道的一家理发店逛逛 |
| [03:14] | You’re looking a little stubbly, | 你这一脸胡子拉碴的 |
| [03:15] | and nobody handles a razor like an Italian. | 只有刀法精湛的意大利人才能打理干净 |
| [03:17] | They develop nimble fingers from pleasing their mistresses. | 这帮人为取悦情人 手指那是相当灵活 |
| [03:21] | Thank you for opening my eyes to two new stereotypes. | 谢谢你又让我长知识 让我知道两种新形象 |
| [03:25] | Now, how can I put this? | 我该怎么说呢 |
| [03:26] | No. I don’t want to go. | 不 我不想去 |
| [03:28] | Not now, not ever. No. | 现在不去 将来也不去 不去 |
| [03:33] | No prob. | 没关系 |
| [03:34] | We’ll work around your skedge. | 按你的时间来 |
| [03:38] | – It’s okay. Pierce is gone. – Yes. | -好了 皮尔斯走了 -很好 |
| [03:40] | Walking dead has left the building. | “行尸”已经离开本楼 |
| [03:40] | Resume “Operation: Deadliest catch.” | 回到”任务 致命捕捞” |
| [03:42] | Archie is gonna love this banner. | 阿奇肯定会喜欢这个横幅的 |
| [03:44] | The name-brand glitter really shows. | 名牌闪光笔闪亮全场 |
| [03:47] | School Board guys in the hizzie! | 校董事会闪亮登场 |
| [03:50] | Richie, Richie, pace yourself. | 里奇 里奇 冷静点 |
| [03:52] | Hey, there, dean. | 你好啊 院长 |
| [03:53] | Just thought we’d pop in | 我们只是想突然过来 |
| [03:54] | and check on the big whale hunt. | 看看你们捕鲸的情况 |
| [03:56] | Ah, what a day we have planned for young Archie. | 我们给小阿奇安排了完美的一天 |
| [03:59] | Library tour, calculator lab demonstration… | 图书馆之旅 计算机实验室展示 |
| [04:02] | And, it all culminates | 而且最后会在 |
| [04:03] | in the “Spirit of Greendale” reception. | “绿苑风骨”招待晚会的高潮中结束 |
| [04:06] | Magnitude is a soft yes. | 搞这么隆重 不怕他不动心 |
| [04:08] | Oh, wow, that’s a get. | 这样就行了 |
| [04:09] | As much as we love that magnitude, | 我们是很喜欢这么隆重 |
| [04:11] | your tour may be lacking a little… | 但你安排的行程似乎少了点 |
| [04:14] | Tour sucks, bro. | 这行程烂极了 哥们 |
| [04:15] | – What? – You gotta think big. | -什么 -你的思维得放开点 |
| [04:18] | Hookers, blow, hookers. | 召妓 毒品 召妓 |
| [04:21] | He’s been mixing, | 他有点混乱 |
| [04:23] | but there is some wisdom there. | 但他说的也有可取之处 |
| [04:24] | We need this whale money. | 我们也需要大头鲸的钱 |
| [04:26] | The kid likes snowboarding. | 那小子喜欢滑雪 |
| [04:28] | Maybe Shaun White finds his way on the faculty roster. | 或许能请肖恩·怀特来这当老师 |
| [04:32] | He likes to party. | 他喜欢派对 |
| [04:33] | Maybe Greendale suddenly has a frat. | 或许格林德尔突然有家兄弟会 |
| [04:36] | The Delta Cubes, or whatever. | 德尔塔兄弟会啥的 |
| [04:38] | Dean, you’re not considering this, are you? | 院长 你不会真想这么做吧 |
| [04:40] | No, no. Greendale stands on its own. | 当然不会 格林德尔有自己的特色 |
| [04:41] | No hookers, no blow, | 没有妓女 没有毒品 |
| [04:43] | No Shaun White frat. | 没有肖恩·怀特兄弟会 |
| [04:44] | College dean threatening a fraternity. | 大学院长威胁一家兄弟会 |
| [04:48] | You’ll never shut down the Delta Cubes. | 你永远别想关掉三角方块会 |
| [04:51] | – What? – Delta Cubes, Delta Cubes, Delta Cubes… | -什么 -三角方块会 三角方块会 |
| [04:54] | Look, it’s your call, Craig. | 听着 决定权在你 克拉格 |
| [04:55] | Don’t let this whale swim away. | 别让这头鲸游走了 |
| [04:58] | Cruise by Skeeper’s express for a refill? | 走”斯奇普”巡游专线 再去续个杯呗 |
| [05:01] | I’ll second that motion. | 这个提议深得我心 |
| [05:06] | I’ve been working on my victory dances. | 我一直在练习庆祝胜利的舞蹈 |
| [05:08] | Basketball, football, | 篮球 橄榄球 |
| [05:11] | and crab soccer. | 这是螃蟹足球的 |
| [05:12] | That one’s the hard one. | 这个动作很难 |
| [05:13] | Well, that’s nice. | 真不错 |
| [05:16] | Hey, when I was in grade school, | 我上小学时 |
| [05:18] | PE was about being picked on and picked last, | 体育课分小组时我总是最后被挑剩下的 |
| [05:21] | But, you’ll put me on your team, right? | 你会选我到你队伍的 对吗 |
| [05:23] | Right…but also, wrong. | 对 但也不对 |
| [05:25] | PE’s about survival of the fittest. | 体育课讲究适者生存 |
| [05:28] | Line up, class. | 排成一排 同学们 |
| [05:31] | Welcome to PEE. I’m coach Jason Chapman. | 欢迎来到PEE 我是杰森·恰普曼教练 |
| [05:34] | Physical education education? | 体育教育教育课 |
| [05:36] | I thought that was a typo in the course “Cartalogue.” | 我还以为是课程表上打错字了 |
| [05:38] | It started as a typo, | 最开始是打错了 |
| [05:40] | But it’s grown into one of Greendale’s | 但是现在它已成为格林德尔 |
| [05:42] | most successful programs. | 最成功的课程之一 |
| [05:43] | Anyone can take PE. | 任何人都可以上体育课 |
| [05:45] | I teach my student coaches to teach PE. | 我教我的学生教练 教体育 |
| [05:49] | Something funny, coach Barnes? | 有什么好笑的 巴恩斯教练 |
| [05:51] | No, it’s just… | 没有 只是 |
| [05:52] | You’re teaching us how to be gym teachers. | 你在教我们怎么做体育老师 |
| [05:54] | Gym teachers? | 体育馆老师[gym也指体育馆] |
| [05:56] | A gym is a building, | 体育馆是栋建筑 |
| [05:58] | a man-made structure inside which | 人造的建筑 在里面 |
| [06:00] | physical education teachers | 体育教育的老师 |
| [06:02] | teach physical education to physical education students. | 对体育教育的学生 进行体育教育 |
| [06:05] | Pop quiz, coach Barnes, | 问个问题 巴恩斯教练 |
| [06:06] | a student is choking on a plastic golf ball. | 一个学生被塑料高尔夫球卡住嗓子眼了 |
| [06:09] | – What do you do? – I… | -你会怎么做 -我 |
| [06:10] | How many orange cones does it take to | 一个标准足球场中 |
| [06:12] | line a regulation soccer field? | 要放置多少橙色锥形标 |
| [06:13] | What if students are talking during stretches? | 如果学生在做伸展运动时聊天怎么办 |
| [06:16] | When my kids talk past bedtime, | 如果我家孩子超过就寝时间还在说话 |
| [06:18] | I use my angry voice, and I say, | 我会用生气的语气说 |
| [06:20] | “The next peep I hear will be the last,” | 不准再叽叽喳喳 |
| [06:21] | And I give ’em one of these. | 我给他们这种表情 |
| [06:23] | Not bad, coach Bennett. | 不错嘛 伯纳德教练 |
| [06:26] | Look at me! | 瞧咱多棒 |
| [06:27] | I see you. | 瞧着呢 |
| [06:31] | Two hours late? | 迟到两小时 |
| [06:32] | This is exactly the lack of follow-through | 正是这种说话好似放屁的德性 |
| [06:34] | that makes Archie so appealing, | 造就了如此吸引人的阿奇 |
| [06:35] | but still, send a text, right? | 但还是 好歹发个短信嘛 |
| [06:37] | Okay, Abed, I told you we’re not doing | 阿布蒂 我说了我们不会 |
| [06:39] | the fraternity idea. | 搞什么兄弟会 |
| [06:41] | The Delta Cubes will never die. | 三角方块会永远不会消失 |
| [06:42] | We’ve only just begun to fight. | 我们的抗争刚刚开始 |
| [06:44] | You only began yesterday. | 你们昨天才成立 |
| [06:46] | Whale, ho! Look alive, everyone. | 大头鲸来了 精神点 各位 |
| [06:48] | Hey, what are you guys all doing out here? | 你们在这里做什么呢 |
| [06:49] | Oh, no! Pierce will ruin everything! | 不好 皮尔斯会毁了一切 |
| [06:51] | What’s an Archie? Why does he get a banner? | 阿奇是谁 为什么他有横幅的待遇 |
| [06:53] | Jeff! Do something. | 杰夫 快想办法 |
| [07:02] | There you are, Pierce. | 你来啦 皮尔斯 |
| [07:03] | Thought you were gonna cancel our plans. | 还以为你要取消我们的计划呢 |
| [07:05] | – Plans? – To spend the entire day | -计划 -就咱们玩一整天 |
| [07:07] | together away from everyone else. | 不带其他人的逍遥计划 |
| [07:10] | Oh, yeah! Those plans. | 对 这个啊 |
| [07:13] | Suck it, bozos. | 一边哭去吧 小样儿 |
| [07:14] | You’re getting ditched by the cool kids. | 酷孩子不带你们玩儿了 |
| [07:16] | Oh, what a day we’re gonna have. | 我们今天会非常开心的 |
| [07:18] | Text me the instant I can ditch him. | 马上给我发短信好借机甩掉他 |
| [07:21] | Hey, guys. | 你们好 |
| [07:22] | Sweet campus. | 校园挺漂亮 |
| [07:23] | Welcome to Greendale. I’m bean Pelton. | 欢迎来到格林德尔 我是派尔顿豆长 |
| [07:25] | “Bean Pelton”? Dean Pelton. | 派尔顿豆长 派尔顿院长 |
| [07:27] | Gosh, I’m nervous. | 老天 我好紧张 |
| [07:28] | Please enroll in our school. Please, please. | 请到我们学校就读 求你了求你了 |
| [07:30] | Nice scooter, Archie. | 好漂亮的摩托 阿奇 |
| [07:32] | Yeah, City College gave it to me as a present. | 对 城市学院送我的 |
| [07:34] | City College? | 城市学院 |
| [07:35] | City College bought you a vespa? | 城市学院给你买了小摩托 |
| [07:37] | Brand-new. | 全新的 |
| [07:40] | So, Archie, have you heard about | 阿奇 你有没有听说 |
| [07:42] | our half-pipes and hash pipes class, | 咱们的极限滑板课程 |
| [07:43] | taught by professor Shaun White? | 上课的是肖恩·怀特教授 |
| [07:45] | – What? – Yeah, let me tell you about it | -什么 -我们去激浪饮料酷爽棚 |
| [07:47] | in our Mountain Dew Cool Zone tent. | 听我给你细细道来 |
| [07:49] | Put up a tent, write “Mountain Dew” on it, | 支个棚子 写上”激浪” |
| [07:50] | Make it cool. | 要够酷够爽 |
| [07:51] | Ah, here we go. | 我们走吧 |
| [07:52] | Let’s keep going. This is our library. | 继续往前 这是我们的图书馆 |
| [07:57] | Okay Archie, why don’t you “Hang ten” on the web | 阿奇 你不如在网上冲下浪 |
| [08:01] | while I talk business, and you know what? | 我去谈点事 知道吗 |
| [08:04] | You can take that computer. | 这电脑你可以拿走 |
| [08:06] | Sweet! | 太好了 |
| [08:06] | My friends and I can drop it off an overpass. | 我可以和朋友一起从天桥上扔下去 |
| [08:08] | Ah, I shouldn’t have heard that. | 真希望这一句我没听见 |
| [08:10] | Dean, you’re giving him our computers? | 院长 你把咱们的电脑给他吗 |
| [08:13] | He is a 22-year-old stoner-head | 他是个22岁的大麻草包 |
| [08:15] | whose parents bought him a GED. | 高中文凭都是他爹妈出钱买的 |
| [08:17] | Which college is he going to choose? | 你觉得他会选择哪所大学 |
| [08:18] | Vespa state, or “Ooh, look at our library” university? | 小摩托 还是”哎哟 瞧咱们的图书馆” |
| [08:22] | Those school board guys were right. | 学校董事会的人说得对 |
| [08:24] | Britta, where do we get drugs? | 布雷塔 在哪里可以买到毒品 |
| [08:25] | Really? | 你不是吧 |
| [08:26] | Look who stumbled onto the high road. | 看谁终于上道了 |
| [08:28] | This is a slippery slope. | 你们这是往死路上走 |
| [08:29] | Well, City College slipped that slope | 城市学院给他小摩托时 |
| [08:31] | when they slipped him that scooter, | 就已经把咱们逼上死路了 |
| [08:32] | but they sure slipped up when they let him set foot on our soil. | 但他们让他踏上咱的地盘则是自寻死路 |
| [08:37] | Three, two, one! | 三 二 一 |
| [08:40] | Time! | 时间到 |
| [08:43] | Coach Barnes, it seems dodge ball storage | 巴恩斯教练 看起来放置躲避球 |
| [08:45] | isn’t quite in your skill set, | 不是你的专长啊 |
| [08:47] | Much like table tennis prep. | 和准备乒乓球桌不相上下 |
| [08:50] | Excellent job, coach Bennett. | 做得非常好 伯纳德教练 |
| [08:51] | You have the spatial reasoning skills | 你有着和年轻的凯文·米勒一样优秀的 |
| [08:53] | of a young Kevin Miller, | 空间推理技巧 |
| [08:55] | A really good PE Teacher I know. | 一位我认识的非常优秀的优育老师 |
| [08:57] | The skill of ranking others in order | 拥有将人按能力水平排序的技巧 |
| [08:59] | of ability is crucial. | 是非常重要的 |
| [09:00] | In this next drill, our two best student coaches | 接下来的训练 两位最优秀的学生教练 |
| [09:03] | will split the rest of the class: | 将挑选班上的同学进行分组 |
| [09:05] | Coach Bennett, coach Neil. | 伯纳德教练 尼尔教练 |
| [09:07] | – Yeah! – Pick your teams. | -好耶 -选队友吧 |
| [09:08] | – Coach Donovan. – Coach Goldman. | -唐纳文教练 -哥德曼教练 |
| [09:10] | – Coach Mckenna. – Coach Cutler. | -米坎娜教练 -卡特勒教练 |
| [09:12] | – Coach Winston. – Ooh, coach Dornetto. | -温斯顿教练 -多纳托教练 |
| [09:13] | – Coach Guest. – Coach Panos! | -盖斯特教练 -帕诺斯教练 |
| [09:17] | Choose wisely. | 做出明智的选择 |
| [09:18] | You’re one decision away from victory or defeat. | 这个选择会决定胜利还是失败 |
| [09:24] | Coach…Marzec. | 马扎克教练 |
| [09:28] | Well picked, coach Bennett. | 选得好 伯纳德教练 |
| [09:29] | Your team wins! | 你的队肯定赢 |
| [09:31] | Oh, we won! Nice! | 我们会赢 太好了 |
| [09:33] | Ah, the barbershop. | 理发店 |
| [09:35] | A reminder of a bygone era when men were men, | 令人怀念过去的岁月 男人是男人 |
| [09:38] | and women were sex cooks who did laundry. | 女人是负责洗衣服的性感厨子 |
| [09:41] | I’ve been getting a daily shave here for decades. | 几十年来我每天都来刮胡子 |
| [09:43] | And apparently, reading the same eight magazines the entire time. | 很显然 一直以来看的是同样的八本杂志 |
| [09:47] | Yeah, National Geographic’s got some tribal boob shots | 《国家地理》上有一些部落女人的裸胸照片 |
| [09:50] | That are exquisite. | 拍得太美了 |
| [09:51] | There’s something about a breast | 没被白手摸过的胸总是别有一番风情 |
| [09:52] | that’s never been touched by white hands. | 没被白手摸过的胸总是别有一番风情 |
| [09:55] | You are a complicated man. | 你这个男人忒复杂了 |
| [09:57] | Silvio, spin up lucky number seven. | 西尔维奥 转到我的幸运数字七 |
| [10:05] | You know what? | 知道吗 |
| [10:06] | That feels good, I’ll give you that. | 这感觉不错 我得承认 |
| [10:10] | Now, that soda goblet | 那个苏打水杯 |
| [10:11] | gets you free refills in the Cafeteria, | 能够让你在食堂得到免费续杯 |
| [10:13] | and it was painted by our Professor Ed Hardy… | 并由我校的爱德·哈代教授绘制而成 |
| [10:17] | who teaches bikini class. | 他是教比基尼课的 |
| [10:19] | Oh, yeah! | 爽 |
| [10:21] | Whoa, check out that bling! | 闪闪的 惹人爱 |
| [10:23] | I want that. | 我要嘛 |
| [10:25] | You heard him, Annie! Bling the King! | 你听到了 安妮 赶紧满足皇上 |
| [10:27] | Yeah, just take it off of him. | 直接撸下来便是 |
| [10:29] | – There you go. – Thank you. | -给你 -谢谢 |
| [10:30] | Delta Cubes! | 三角方块兄弟们 |
| [10:31] | Prepare to bond through embarrassment. | 准备好通过窘境培养感情 |
| [10:33] | Pacifiers in! | 奶嘴进嘴 |
| [10:36] | Commence… | 开始 |
| [10:37] | Code Dean! Code Dean! | 院长警报 撤撤撤 |
| [10:38] | Gosh Dean it, Abed! I told you, no fraternities! | 该死 阿布蒂 我说了不能搞兄弟会 |
| [10:42] | There’s soda all over my kicks! | 苏打水弄了我一鞋 |
| [10:44] | Britta, give Archie your scarf so he can dry his kicks. | 布雷塔 把你的围巾给阿奇擦鞋 |
| [10:47] | Dry his kicks, Britta. Put your back into it! | 给他擦鞋 布雷塔 给我用力点 |
| [10:49] | No! Line drawn! | 不要 我划条界限 |
| [10:52] | If I wanted to wait on a rich man hand and foot, | 如果我想给富人做牛做马 |
| [10:54] | I would’ve gone to Dubai with that sheik I met at Trader Joe’s. | 我不如去找乔氏超市邂逅的迪拜酋长呢 |
| [10:58] | Don’t worry about her, Archie. | 别搭理她 阿奇 |
| [11:00] | Onward to the Microbrew Pizzatorium! | 移驾前往微烤披萨馆 |
| [11:04] | I think all a man needs in life | 我认为男人需要的就是 |
| [11:06] | is a close shave, a cold beer, | 麻溜的剃须和冰凉的啤酒 |
| [11:08] | and you know, maybe a faithful dog. | 或许再有一条忠诚的狗 |
| [11:10] | Hm, I had a chocolate lab growing up…Rosie. | 小时候我有条巧克力色拉布拉多 罗西 |
| [11:15] | She use to wake me up every morning by licking my feet. | 她每天舔我的脚叫我起床 |
| [11:17] | Mine was Walter, a German shepherd. | 我的狗叫沃尔特 德国牧羊犬 |
| [11:20] | Followed me to school every day. | 每天跟着我上学 |
| [11:22] | I’d look out the window, and there he was, | 我往窗外一看 它就在那 |
| [11:25] | dropping a steaming fat one on the lawn. | 在草坪上拉了一坨 |
| [11:28] | Would someone please tell me | 谁能好心告诉我 |
| [11:29] | why I’ve been shaving my own face | 这么些年来 我究竟为何像土鳖一样 |
| [11:31] | all these years like a sucker? | 自己给自己刮胡子 |
| [11:37] | This state-of-the-art mock locker room, | 最先进的模拟更衣室 |
| [11:39] | or “Mocker room,” | 也叫模拟室 |
| [11:40] | simulates the conditions of an actual locker room. | 模拟了真正更衣室的状况 |
| [11:43] | Don’t we have an actual locker room? | 我们难道没有更衣室吗 |
| [11:45] | You think you’re ready for that, Coach Barnes? | 你觉得你有能力应对吗 巴恩斯教练 |
| [11:48] | For our next drill, drama students | 下一次演习 戏剧学生 |
| [11:50] | will play the role of PE students, | 扮演上体育课的学生 |
| [11:52] | and each of you will oversee them in a “Mocker room” setting. | 你们所有人将观察他们在模拟室的行为 |
| [11:55] | My character just had her first period. | 我的角色第一次例假 |
| [11:58] | Mine has eczema! | 我的角色得了湿疹 |
| [11:59] | Coach Bennett, care to go first? | 伯纳德教练 你先来 |
| [12:01] | Yes! | 好的 |
| [12:05] | Keep your hands to yourself! | 把手放老实点 |
| [12:07] | Running will get you five laps, mister! | 乱跑就给我出去跑五圈 小子 |
| [12:09] | Joey! | 乔伊 |
| [12:10] | I will come in that shower and kick yo bare ass! | 再闹我就进你淋浴间踢你的光屁股 |
| [12:13] | Sorry, Coach Bennett. | 抱歉 伯纳德教练 |
| [12:14] | I have never seen such natural disciplinary skills. | 我从未见过这么与生俱来的训诫技能 |
| [12:17] | You’re up next, Coach Barnes. | 你是下一个 巴恩斯教练 |
| [12:19] | Entertain us with your ineptitude. | 用你的愚笨来娱乐我们吧 |
| [12:24] | How’s the foam machine coming, Leonard? | 发泡机弄得怎么样了 伦纳德 |
| [12:26] | Memories will be made tonight. | 世人将永远记得这一天 |
| [12:28] | Destiny! | 德斯缇尼 |
| [12:29] | Oh, thank you for coming on such short notice. | 感谢你临时能赶来 |
| [12:31] | Well, I did get your Christmas card. | 我收到你的圣诞卡了 |
| [12:32] | Look…no, so…no, no, no time to pre-party. | 不不 没时间开预热派对了 |
| [12:35] | You and the girls get in position and wait for my signal. | 你和姑娘们各就各位准备好 等我信号 |
| [12:38] | Strippers? | 脱衣舞娘 |
| [12:39] | Oh, tons. | 一大群 |
| [12:40] | It’s good for the school. | 这是为了学校好 |
| [12:42] | The whale is here. Balloon drop, go! | 大头鲸来了 落气球 走你 |
| [12:49] | There you go. | 好的 |
| [12:50] | Release the whores. | 淫娃登场 |
| [12:52] | – Oh, yeah. – No way! | -哦耶 -不是吧 |
| [12:57] | Pierce. | 皮尔斯 |
| [12:59] | I was wrong about this shop. | 我看错了这个店 |
| [13:01] | It really is special. | 它很特别 |
| [13:03] | Well, if you like the place so much, | 如果你这么喜欢 |
| [13:05] | why don’t you gay marry it? | 娶它算了 |
| [13:13] | You probably didn’t notice it, Jeff, | 你可能没注意到 杰夫 |
| [13:14] | but I’ve been subtly trying to get us some alone time. | 但我一直精心设计想让咱俩单独相处 |
| [13:17] | I might’ve picked up on that. | 我有所察觉 |
| [13:19] | I’m no stranger to father issues, | 我也有老爸问题 |
| [13:22] | so I know confronting your dad couldn’t have been easy, | 我知道跟你爸爸对峙不好受 |
| [13:24] | and I just want to say I’m proud of you. | 我想说我为你感到骄傲 |
| [13:28] | Well… If you’re so proud… | 如果你骄傲的话 |
| [13:32] | Why don’t you gay marry me? | 何不搞基嫁给我 |
| [13:37] | You guys, behave! | 你们 老实点 |
| [13:39] | Hit the showers! Everybody in the showers! | 去洗澡 大家都去洗澡啦 |
| [13:41] | Please stop hitting each other! | 别打闹了 |
| [13:43] | – Hit the showers! – Cut! Scene! | -去洗澡吧 -卡 换场景 |
| [13:46] | Shirley, help. | 雪莉 救命 |
| [13:47] | I can’t control these drama students or their characters. | 我控制不了这些戏剧学生或他们的角色 |
| [13:49] | No! No! | 不要啊 |
| [13:51] | PE is survival of the fittest, Troy. | 体育课就是适者生存 特洛伊 |
| [13:57] | Hey, your phone’s buzzing. | 你的电话在震 |
| [13:59] | Ooh, it’s from Annie. You sly dog. | 安妮发来的 你个老东西 |
| [14:03] | “Need more time. Keep Pierce busy.” | 需要点时间 稳住皮尔斯 |
| [14:07] | Keep me busy? | 稳住我 |
| [14:08] | Look, the group is giving some big shot a tour, | 学习小组在领一个大人物参观校园 |
| [14:12] | so it’s my job to keep you busy. | 我的任务是稳住你 |
| [14:15] | You know how you get jealous. | 因为你会嫉妒 |
| [14:16] | So, that’s why you spent the day with me? | 因为这个你才跟我在一起 |
| [14:19] | You drew the short straw. | 你是抽签被迫来的 |
| [14:20] | Well, that’s how it started, | 开始是这样 |
| [14:22] | but I really did end up having a good time. | 但是我发现自己度过了愉快的时光 |
| [14:24] | Yeah, I used to regret not having a son to bring here. | 是啊 我以前很遗憾没有儿子带他来这 |
| [14:29] | I’m glad I didn’t have kids. | 我很高兴我没有孩子 |
| [14:30] | They just end up disappointing you. | 他们总是会让你失望 |
| [14:41] | So Archie, having a good time? | 阿奇 玩得愉快吗 |
| [14:43] | Gettin’ cray up in this club? | 在这里过得爽吗 |
| [14:45] | Sicker than ever, bro! | 爽死 伙计 |
| [14:47] | I’ve made my decision, Dean. | 我决定了 院长 |
| [14:48] | I’m about to get all up in this Greendale. | 我要来格林德尔上学 |
| [14:54] | Human beings, it’s official! | 人类同学们 确认了 |
| [14:55] | Say hello to our newest greendalian, | 向我们的新校友问好 |
| [14:58] | Archie Decoste! | 阿奇·德克斯 |
| [15:01] | – Pop pop! – Pop pop! | -噼里啪啦砰 -噼里啪啦砰 |
| [15:04] | I want that to be my thing now. | 我要把这个词作为我的口头禅 |
| [15:08] | I don’t think you can do that. | 那不行 |
| [15:12] | Magnitude, you’re not to say “Pop pop” ever again. | 磁态态 你不能用”噼里啪啦砰”了 |
| [15:17] | Not pop? | 不能砰 |
| [15:18] | That’s right. Find a new thing. | 是的 找个新口头禅 |
| [15:20] | Get him out of here. | 把他带出去 |
| [15:21] | Ah! Here we go! We’re back! | 好啦 继续狂欢吧 |
| [15:32] | Pop pop! | 噼里啪啦砰 |
| [15:42] | Well, we did it. | 我们成功了 |
| [15:42] | We did what we had to do, | 做了我们该做的 |
| [15:44] | and I feel great about it. | 我感觉很好 |
| [15:45] | – It’s all for Greendale. – All for Greendale. | -一切都是为了格林德尔 -为了格林德尔 |
| [15:48] | Oh, you look pretty sad for someone whose Forensics Club | 你的法鉴社团终于有钱成立先进的尸研所了 |
| [15:50] | can now afford that state-of-the-art body farm. | 你咋还这么不高兴啊 |
| [15:53] | I can smell the corpses now. | 我都能闻见福尔马林味啦 |
| [15:55] | None of this is weighing on you? | 这一切你心里就不觉得沉重吗 |
| [15:57] | Sha! | 说啥呢 |
| [15:57] | The only thing weighing on me is tons and tons of whale money. | 唯一让我沉重的是大笔大笔的钞票好吧 |
| [16:00] | – Ah, Jeffrey. – Hey. Landed a whale, huh? | -杰夫瑞 -钓到条大头鲸啊 |
| [16:02] | Yeah, but I’m starting to feel like maybe we… | 是啊 但我开始觉得也许… |
| [16:05] | Archie goes to Greendale now. | 阿奇是格林德尔的一员了 |
| [16:06] | We’re moving forward, Annie! | 再纠结也没用了 安妮 |
| [16:07] | Okay, we all paid a price. | 我们都付出了代价 |
| [16:09] | You don’t hear Jeffrey grumbling, | 我可没听杰夫瑞发牢骚 |
| [16:10] | and, he had to spend a whole day with walking dead. | 人家还被迫跟老不死的”行尸”过了一天呢 |
| [16:12] | – Well, that’s true. – You know what? | -这倒是真的 -知道吗 |
| [16:14] | I can’t believe I’m gonna say this. | 真不敢相信我居然会这么说 |
| [16:16] | Don’t talk about Pierce like that. | 不要这样说皮尔斯 |
| [16:18] | Look, maybe the only reason he can be so unpleasant | 也许正因为我们都认定他讨人厌 |
| [16:20] | is because we expect him to be. | 他才那么烦人 |
| [16:23] | If we don’t treat him like such a dick… | 如果我们不把他当成混蛋对待 |
| [16:25] | well, he’ll probably still be one 98% of the time, | 当然98%的时间里他还是会犯浑 |
| [16:27] | but the 2% he’s tolerable, | 但剩下的时间里他还是可以忍受的 |
| [16:30] | it might be worth it. | 也许这就值得了 |
| [16:34] | Who put the salt in his cereal, huh? | 他这是吃错药了吧 |
| [16:37] | Look, I, for one, am still proud of what we did for Greendale. | 至少我为我们为格林德尔做的努力感到骄傲 |
| [16:42] | I’ve been up all night trying out new catchphrases. | 我一整晚都在琢磨新的口头禅 |
| [16:49] | Diggity doo? | “七个隆咚锵”怎么样 |
| [16:52] | My God, what have we done? | 天啊 我们造了什么孽啊 |
| [16:55] | I thought you dropped PEE. | 我以为你退掉了体育教育教育课呢 |
| [16:58] | I did, but I lost my keys in the mocker. | 我是退了 不过我把钥匙丢在整人柜里了 |
| [17:01] | I had to hitchhike home last night in a burrito truck. | 导致昨晚我不得不搭了辆玉米煎饼车回家 |
| [17:04] | It’s not as fun as it sounds. | 听起来挺逗其实完全不是 |
| [17:05] | I’m sorry for how I acted in class. | 很抱歉我在课上那么做 |
| [17:07] | Don’t apologize. | 不用道歉 |
| [17:08] | You were the fittest, and you survived. | 你最合群 所以才能熬过来 |
| [17:11] | Still, no one deserves to be mocked | 但因为不会整人所以被人整 |
| [17:13] | for being mock-locked in a mock locker. | 被锁进整人柜 这并不公平 |
| [17:16] | Friends should help friends survive. | 朋友应该互相扶持相依为命 |
| [17:18] | Ah! Oh, geez! | 天啊 |
| [17:23] | So, I’m going to help you learn | 我要帮你学习 |
| [17:25] | to teach the most unteachable student there is. | 如何教会最难教的学生 |
| [17:29] | *Teachers teaching to teach* | *教师教授教学* |
| [17:31] | *Coaches coaching to coach* | *教练教授训练* |
| [17:34] | *You’ve gotta dig down deep* | *若想出人头地* |
| [17:36] | *To prove you want it the most* | *必须刻苦钻研* |
| [17:39] | *Get your physical education* | *体育教育不简单* |
| [17:43] | *There’s no room in the gym for hesitation* | *体育馆里更艰难* |
| [17:49] | *PEE is not PE* | *PEE不是PE* |
| [17:51] | *It’s a totally different philosophy* | *莫要混为一谈* |
| [17:54] | *It’s physical education* | *这是体育教育* |
| [17:57] | *Education* | *教育课* |
| [17:59] | Well done, Coach Barnes. | 干得好 巴恩斯教练 |
| [18:01] | You as well, Coach Bennett. | 还有你 伯纳德教练 |
| [18:03] | You know, I was supposed to teach you two | 我应该教会你们两个 |
| [18:05] | to teach other people, but instead, | 如何教育别人 但反过来 |
| [18:07] | you ended up teaching me. | 你们却教育了我 |
| [18:11] | I did it! | 我成功了 |
| [18:13] | I used the water fountain. | 我会用水龙头喝水啦 |
| [18:17] | Archie, wake up! | 阿奇 醒醒 |
| [18:19] | Chillax, bro. | “冷松”啦 老兄 |
| [18:21] | It’s not even noon. | 还没到中午呢 |
| [18:22] | I will neither chill nor relax. | 我没法冷静 也没法放松 |
| [18:24] | All this hoopla is not what Greendale really is. | 所有这些胡闹混事并非格林德尔的风格 |
| [18:28] | Greendale is a nice welcome banner. | 格林德尔是条温暖的欢迎横幅 |
| [18:30] | Greendale is a foamless cafeteria. | 格林德尔是间整洁的食堂餐厅 |
| [18:33] | And Greendale is Magnitude saying “pop pop.” | 格林德尔是让磁态态说”噼里啪啦砰”的地方 |
| [18:38] | Now, I am a man of very little integrity, | 我这个人脾气很好 |
| [18:40] | and I let students get away with practically | 向来对学生在学校的各种恶性 |
| [18:41] | anything on this campus, | 全盘纵容 |
| [18:43] | but I will not allow Greendale | 但我不允许格林德尔 |
| [18:46] | to lose the things that make it Greendale. | 失去它的本质 |
| [18:48] | Now, Archie, I would love for you to enroll in my school, | 阿奇 你想入学 我很欢迎 |
| [18:51] | but I will not change it for you. | 但学校不会因你而改变 |
| [18:53] | Greendale will stay Greendale, | 格林德尔要保持原样 |
| [18:57] | No matter what. | 无论什么情况 |
| [19:00] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
| [19:01] | Everybody kisses my ass because my dad is loaded, | 每个人都拍我马屁 只因我爹有钱 |
| [19:05] | and they always give me free stuff, | 他们总是送我东西 |
| [19:07] | like that jet ski I sunk, | 比如那个我玩沉了的水上摩托 |
| [19:09] | but it would be pretty sweet | 但被当做平常人对待 |
| [19:11] | to be treated like a normal dude… | 其实也蛮不错的 |
| [19:13] | so I’m in. | 我报名入学 |
| [19:17] | Magnitude. | 磁态态 |
| [19:18] | You usually have the perfect blend | 此时此刻此情此景 |
| [19:20] | of brevity and wit that sums up situations like this. | 你一直有着最完美 最言简意赅的总结语 |
| [19:24] | Pop pop! | 噼里啪啦砰 |
| [19:27] | – Oh, that’s so good! – So good! | -太好了 -好极了 |
| [19:29] | I think we all learned today that | 我想今天我们都懂得了 |
| [19:31] | all human beings deserve dignity. | 所有人都值得有尊严 |
| [19:35] | Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes! | 三角方块会 三角方块会 |
| [19:37] | Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes! | 三角方块会 三角方块会 |
| [19:39] | Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes! | 三角方块会 三角方块会 |
| [19:42] | Delta Cubes, operation: Slack attack! | 三角方块会听令 脱裤行动 |
| [19:44] | Slack attack? | 脱裤行动 |
| [19:47] | Delta Cubes! Delta Cubes! | 三角方块会 三角方块会 |
| [19:49] | Mark my words, Delta Cubes, | 你们记好了 三角方块会 |
| [19:51] | you’ll pay for this! | 我饶不了你们 |
| [20:02] | Is this seat taken? | 这座位能做吗 |
| [20:04] | Free country. | 没人拦着你 |
| [20:11] | You know, I was thinking | 知道吗 我在想 |
| [20:14] | I might start coming here more often. | 也许我应该常来这里 |
| [20:18] | I like the vibe. | 我喜欢这个氛围 |
| [20:22] | You know what sport I never got? | 知道我最搞不懂的运动是啥么 |
| [20:25] | Golf. | 高尔夫 |
| [20:28] | No argument here. | 我没有异议 |
| [20:29] | They lost me immediately with the clown clothes. | 看见那滑稽的高尔夫球衫我就没兴趣 |
| [20:32] | You know, I belong to a dozen country clubs. | 我注册了12个乡村高尔夫俱乐部 |
| [20:34] | Never played. | 但从没玩过 |
| [20:35] | I just spend my time hitting on the waitresses. | 我就为了调戏美女服务员 |
| [20:37] | There’s something about a country club waitress | 乡村俱乐部里的女招待 |
| [20:39] | that just makes you wanna pay your dues every year. | 能让你心甘情愿每年向他们缴会费 |
| [20:44] | *Let’s snack it up* | *零食时间到* |
| [20:46] | *Let’s do it right* | *大家动起来* |
| [20:49] | *Let’s taste the crisp with the flavor and crunch* | *松脆可口香喷喷* |
| [20:51] | *With all our might* | *让你乐开怀* |
| [20:53] | *Let’s grab a bag* | *美味袋中藏* |
| [20:55] | *Let’s take a bite* | *吃得真痛快* |
| [20:57] | *Let’s Grab Potato Chips, let’s do it right* | *乐吃薯片我们的最爱* |
| [21:00] | Get your damn hand off of my Let’s! | 我的”乐吃” 伸爪的去屎 |
| [21:06] | Honestly, after all that, you still eat Splingles? | 看完这么好的广告 你还吃”四品客” |
| [21:08] | Uh, yeah, Troy. | 没错 特洛伊 |
| [21:09] | Splingles have 30% less fat. | “四品客”脂肪含量低30% |
| [21:11] | They’re the fit chip. | 是减肥薯片 |
| [21:13] | You know, I kinda have a headache. | 我有点头疼 |
| [21:15] | Maybe you should go home. | 你回家吧 |