| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Hi, Pierce. Oh… | 你好 皮尔斯 |
| [00:10] | Happy new year, you guys. | 新年快乐 伙计们 |
| [00:11] | Do anything fun over break? | 放假有什么趣事 |
| [00:13] | Oh, baby Ben got to be baby Jesus | 小本在咱们教堂的圣诞剧目中 |
| [00:14] | in our church’s nativity play. | 扮演耶稣宝宝 |
| [00:15] | Andre was Joseph, and Jordan was one of the wise men, | 安德烈扮演约瑟夫 乔丹扮演智者 |
| [00:18] | and I was in charge of casting. | 我负责选角 |
| [00:19] | I digitized my entire movie collection. | 我将所有电影收藏数字化了 |
| [00:22] | Good-bye, VHS. | 拜拜了您呐 录像机 |
| [00:23] | Hello, selectavision CED video disc. | 欢迎 VCD播放机 |
| [00:26] | I’m very psyched for the new semester. | 我对新学期作好了心理准备 |
| [00:28] | Or should I say… | 或者应该说 |
| [00:30] | Intro to Human Psyched. | 学习了《人类心理学导论》 |
| [00:32] | The worst. | 差劲 |
| [00:33] | For our midterm, we actually get to diagnose | 到了期中 我们便能在同学中实践 |
| [00:36] | a fellow student with something. | 为他们确诊 |
| [00:37] | Don’t you do way too much of that already? | 你不是已经给许多人确诊过了吗 |
| [00:39] | Accusational opposition disorder. | 指控性反对失调症 |
| [00:42] | Hello. | 大家好 |
| [00:44] | It appears you’ve all noticed that my swagger | 看来你们已经注意到我的狂妄自大 |
| [00:46] | has a new swagger. | 又扩张了一个档次 |
| [00:47] | I’ll explain. | 我来解释 |
| [00:48] | Over break, I took the plunge | 放假时 我尝试了 |
| [00:50] | and started seeing a new shrink. | 去看新的心理医生 |
| [00:51] | What? Hello! | 搞什么 名医在此 |
| [00:52] | Hello. Anyway, I talked about my dad, | 幸会 总之 我谈了和父亲的心结 |
| [00:55] | punched a few pillows. | 狠揍了一堆枕头 |
| [00:56] | And she put me on this amazing anti-anxiety pill. | 她给我开了些超棒的抗焦虑药 |
| [00:59] | It’s really enhanced my self-confidence. | 大大地提高了我的自信 |
| [01:02] | I explained that really well. | 我解释得太精彩了 |
| [01:03] | Jeff, you can’t be on anti-anxiety meds. | 杰夫 你不能吃抗焦虑药 |
| [01:06] | What little self-doubt you have is the only thing | 你的自负能保持安分守己就指着 |
| [01:09] | keeping your ego penned in. | 你这一小点点的自我怀疑呢 |
| [01:10] | You are a textbook narcissist. | 你是个教科书版的标准自恋狂 |
| [01:13] | I’m an exceptional narcissist, Britta. | 我是与众不同的自恋狂 布雷塔 |
| [01:15] | Oh, excuse me. | 失陪下 |
| [01:18] | I didn’t kill my wife! | 我没有杀我妻子 |
| [01:20] | I don’t care. | 我不在乎 |
| [01:28] | Stop that fugitive! | 别再逃了 |
| [01:31] | I was wondering how long it would take | 我纳闷多久 |
| [01:32] | for things to get back to normal. | 才会恢复正常 |
| [01:33] | Over break, Abed realized he could hire | 放假时 阿布蒂发现他可以 |
| [01:35] | celebrity impersonators from a service | 从中介聘请明星模仿者 |
| [01:36] | for his own personal use. | 为他专人服务 |
| [01:38] | He’s been doing it…a lot. | 他自此 沉迷其中 |
| [01:40] | He’s not hurting anybody. | 他又没有伤害到谁 |
| [01:41] | He just likes reenacting scenes from movies. | 他只是再现电影经典场景而已 |
| [01:43] | It’s unquestionably awesome. | 毫无疑问的超级赞 |
| [01:44] | I question it. | 我表示怀疑 |
| [01:45] | He spent new year’s locked in our bathroom | 他整个新年都和 《荒岛余生》中 |
| [01:47] | with a bad Tom Hanks from Cast Away. | 邪恶版汤姆·汉克斯锁在洗手间里 |
| [01:48] | Abed was the volleyball? | 阿布蒂扮演排球吗 |
| [01:49] | – Well, that makes sense. – You guys, focus! | -说得通 -各位 注意重点 |
| [01:51] | Where’s he getting the money for all this? | 请模仿者的钱哪里来的 |
| [01:53] | Intervention. Intervention. Intervention. | 开劝诫会 开劝诫会 开劝诫会 |
| [01:55] | No! You guys need to stop intervening. | 不 你们不要再干预别人的生活了 |
| [01:57] | You seriously have a problem. | 你们有什么毛病啊 |
| [01:58] | – I said I didn’t kill my wife! – I still don’t care. | -我说我没杀我妻子 -我还是不在乎 |
| [02:01] | Freeze! | 不许动 |
| [02:04] | Chang, they’re just acting! | 昌 他们演戏而已 |
| [02:07] | – Oh. Sorry. – What was that? | -不好意思 -什么情况 |
| [02:11] | I’ve got a friend at the zoo. | 我一哥们儿在动物园上班 |
| [02:41] | What is this I hear about a tranquilizer gun? | 麻醉枪到底是怎么回事 |
| [02:43] | If you had hit a small student, | 如果你击中了小个子学生 |
| [02:45] | they could have died! | 人家会死的 |
| [02:47] | I wouldn’t do that. | 我不会那样做 |
| [02:48] | I have a heavy flashlight for them. | 我都是用超大手电筒恐吓他们 |
| [02:49] | Oh, Ben! | 本 |
| [02:51] | Look, I have to resort to extreme measures. | 我必须采取极端手段 |
| [02:54] | I’m a one-man army. | 我这儿光杆司令一个 |
| [02:56] | You won’t let me have any guards. | 你都不给人家配手下 |
| [02:57] | We’re broke, Ben! | 咱学校是穷光蛋 本 |
| [02:59] | We now get 80% of our electricity | 咱们家80%的电是从 |
| [03:00] | from the apartment building across the street. | 对街住宅楼偷来的 |
| [03:05] | Okay… | 好啦 |
| [03:06] | I don’t know who told you pouting was an option for you, | 谁告诉你噘嘴这招管用的 |
| [03:09] | but all you’re making me feel right now | 你现在让我产生的感觉是 |
| [03:11] | is hatred of Renee Zellweger. | 对芮妮·齐薇格恨之入骨 |
| [03:15] | Look, maybe you can bring on some students as security interns. | 或许你可以招募些学生作为保安实习生 |
| [03:19] | I’ll let you offer them a credit | 我可以给他们 |
| [03:21] | in Safety or Math or something. | 安全课或是数学课的学分 |
| [03:23] | Thank you, sir. | 多谢 院长大人 |
| [03:24] | You won’t regret this unless I rise up against you. | 除非我造反推翻你 否则你不会后悔的 |
| [03:27] | I don’t know why I said that. Bye. | 不知道为什么说这句 再见 |
| [03:39] | Jeff. Jeff! | 杰夫 杰夫 |
| [03:41] | I looked it up. I was right. | 我查了资料 我是对的 |
| [03:42] | Oh, that thing about Danny Thomas? | 丹尼·托马斯的事吗[老牌喜剧演员] |
| [03:44] | I looked it up too. Weird. | 我也查了 好奇怪 |
| [03:45] | No, those meds you’re taking. | 不是 是你吃的药 |
| [03:47] | Without anxiety to keep your vanity in check, | 没有焦虑阻止你的虚荣心膨胀的话 |
| [03:50] | you are vulnerable to a syndrome called hyper-narcissosis. | 你对高度自恋狂症候群完全没抵抗力 |
| [03:53] | Okay, look. This apple is your ego. | 听着 这个苹果好比你的自负 |
| [03:56] | Imagine it expanding to the point of critical mass, | 想象它膨胀到临界点 |
| [03:59] | taking over your whole personality, | 掌控你的人性 |
| [04:01] | making you an uncontrollable monster. | 让你变成不受控制的怪物 |
| [04:04] | Britta, how did an apple make that clear? | 布雷塔 苹果怎么能解释清楚 |
| [04:06] | Imagine it expanding? | 还想象苹果膨胀? |
| [04:07] | – Use a balloon. – I was on my way to lunch. | -用气球打比方吧 -我正要去吃午饭 |
| [04:09] | Why are you trying to take this away from me? | 你为什么就不能让我好过些呢 |
| [04:10] | I like having no anxiety. | 我享受无焦虑一身轻 |
| [04:12] | I’m in harmony with the world. | 世界对我来说是和谐的 |
| [04:14] | Looking good, Winger. | 气色不错 翁格 |
| [04:15] | Thank you, Leonard, for that compliment, | 多谢 伦纳德 多谢夸奖 |
| [04:17] | and for your service to this country. | 多谢你曾参军为国效力 |
| [04:19] | I’m so confident now, | 我现在超级自信 |
| [04:20] | I can pull things off I never dreamed possible. | 我以前不敢想的事情现在都能搞定 |
| [04:22] | Look. Aviators. | 瞧着 飞行员 |
| [04:25] | Final boarding call, Beefcake Airways. | 最后一次登机广播 猛男航空公司 |
| [04:27] | I’m warning you as your friend | 我以朋友的立场 |
| [04:28] | to get off of those meds. | 警告你别再服药了 |
| [04:30] | And until they’re out of your system, | 在药物排出体外前 |
| [04:31] | stay away from flattering situations– | 远离谄媚奉承 |
| [04:33] | weddings, soft lighting, | 远离婚礼 远离暧昧灯光 |
| [04:35] | formal wear, gay bars. | 别出席正装场合 别去同性恋酒吧 |
| [04:37] | And take those off! | 摘下那玩意儿 |
| [04:38] | Because they make me look good? | 因为戴上会帅瞎你的眼吗 |
| [04:39] | That’s not relevant. | 这你别管 |
| [04:40] | Ah, welcome back, Jeffrey. How was your– | 欢迎回来 杰夫瑞 怎么 |
| [04:46] | Oh, my god! Even his shadow! | 神呐 连影子都帅到不行 |
| [04:48] | Look at his shadow! | 看他的影子 |
| [04:56] | Security internship available. | 保安实习职位空缺 |
| [04:58] | Come on, see the world. | 来拥抱世界呀 |
| [05:00] | Well, you won’t see the world, but come on! | 好吧 世界是拥抱不了的 给点面子嘛 |
| [05:04] | – Hey, Nadir. – Oh, hey, Vinnie. | -纳德尔 -文尼 |
| [05:07] | Vinnie’s the owner of the Doppel Gang, | 文尼是”明星山寨”的老板 |
| [05:08] | the celebrity impersonator service I use. | 我体验过他们的明星脸服务 |
| [05:10] | You look familiar. | 你挺眼熟嘛 |
| [05:11] | That’s how we all get started in this racket. | 咱都是从底层开始混的 |
| [05:12] | But at a certain point, if you’re smart, | 不过你要是机灵的话 |
| [05:14] | you move up to management before the gold mine | 就能趁这张值钱的弗伦奇·斯图尔特脸干瘪前 |
| [05:17] | of resembling French Stewart runs dry. | 找准时机混上管理层了 |
| [05:19] | French Stewart… | 弗伦奇·斯图尔特 |
| [05:21] | And speaking of gold mines, | 说到”值钱” |
| [05:22] | You owe me three grand, pal. | 哥们 你欠我三千块 |
| [05:24] | Cool. Put it on my account. | 行 记我账上 |
| [05:25] | What do I look like, a sucker? | 你当我谁啊 傻逼吗 |
| [05:27] | French Stewart. But I don’t have three grand. | 我当你是弗伦奇·斯图尔特 可我没钱 |
| [05:28] | Well, you know what, you better get it. | 那你最好找钱来 |
| [05:30] | Because I’m gonna tell you something right now– | 我可告诉你 |
| [05:32] | Holy crap, you’d make an amazing Seacrest. | 我去 你扮西克雷斯特肯定不错 |
| [05:34] | Very kind. Thank you. | 谢谢夸奖 |
| [05:36] | You’re actually a lot taller than Seacrest. | 而且你比他还高大不少 |
| [05:39] | You’ve actually got a sharper jaw too. | 下巴也更尖一些 |
| [05:41] | It’s amazing, you’re actually more handsome than the guy | 比起那个以帅独步江湖的小子 |
| [05:42] | who’s famous for being handsome. | 你可比他帅多了 |
| [05:44] | Jeff? | 杰夫 |
| [05:50] | You’ll be okay. Just stay humble. | 没事的 姿态放低些 |
| [05:54] | You know what, maybe there’s another option for you. | 这样吧 哥再给你指条明路 |
| [05:56] | I’ve got a big event Saturday, | 周六我有一场活动 |
| [05:58] | Needs a lot of bodies, huh? | 特缺人 |
| [06:00] | And I see some high-value faces here. | 你们这又有几张不错的明星脸 |
| [06:03] | Got an Oprah. | 奥普拉 |
| [06:04] | And sitting next to her | 她身边这位呢 |
| [06:05] | is a Judy Garland or an Anne Hathaway. | 可以扮朱迪·嘉兰或者安妮·海瑟薇 |
| [06:07] | Add a few extra teeth. | 不过得装副大门牙 |
| [06:09] | Wow, this is rare. | 这俩更绝 |
| [06:10] | Both versions of Michael Jackson. | 黑白两版迈克尔·杰克逊 |
| [06:13] | And you… | 你呢 |
| [06:15] | – Fat Brando. – Burt Reynolds. | -发福白兰度 -伯特·雷诺兹 |
| [06:16] | – What? – What? | -啥 -啥 |
| [06:17] | – Fat Brando. – Burt Reynolds. | -发福白兰度 -伯特·雷诺兹 |
| [06:18] | – Whatever. – Whatever. | -随便 -随便 |
| [06:19] | Look, if you guys work this gig for me | 你们要是来干这一票 |
| [06:21] | for six hours, we’ll call it even. | 六小时 咱就算扯平了 |
| [06:24] | Sounds fun. | 可以啊 |
| [06:24] | Abed, Vinnie, can we have a minute to talk about this? | 阿布蒂 文尼 能让我们商量一下吗 |
| [06:27] | Sure. Come on, Vinnie. The guy who makes the fish sticks | 行 文尼 来 那个炸鱼条的 |
| [06:29] | looks just like Quincy Jones. | 长得超像昆西·琼斯 |
| [06:30] | – Get out. – Seriously. | -不会吧 -真的 |
| [06:31] | Guys, I’m sorry, | 不好意思 |
| [06:32] | but this is where we have to put our foot down. | 这事儿我们不能掺和 |
| [06:34] | Well, she has a point. | 她说的挺在理 |
| [06:35] | Next time it’ll be $10,000, and then $20,000, | 下次说不定就是一万 再下次就是两万 |
| [06:37] | and then he’ll hit rock bottom | 然后越欠越多 |
| [06:38] | and have no one to turn to but Jesus. | 最后只有上帝能帮他了 |
| [06:40] | I say we let this play out. | 要我说咱们别管了 |
| [06:41] | I’d love to help, | 我倒是愿意帮忙 |
| [06:42] | But playing Ryan Seacrest at a big party | 不过在大型派对上扮瑞安·西克雷斯特 |
| [06:45] | may not be a safe situation for me. | 对我本人可能不太好 |
| [06:46] | We could actually hurt Abed | 每次阿布蒂要面对现实问题 |
| [06:48] | if every time he faces reality, | 我们就穿上戏服帮他搞定 |
| [06:50] | we dress up and play make-believe to bail him out. | 这样是在害阿布蒂 |
| [06:53] | Shame on you people. | 你们真好意思说 |
| [06:55] | It’s not our job to help Abed grow up. | 阿布蒂要不要成长不用你们管 |
| [06:57] | Abed doesn’t need reality. | 他不需要现实 |
| [06:59] | Abed is a magical, elf-like man | 他是一个谜一样的神人 |
| [07:01] | who makes us all more magical by being near us. | 有他在 我们的生活也充满了神奇色彩 |
| [07:04] | Pierce, who came over in the middle of the night | 皮尔斯 上次你大半夜忘了怎么放屁 |
| [07:06] | that time you forgot how to fart? | 是谁过去教你的 |
| [07:07] | – Abed. – Shirley… | -阿布蒂 -雪瑞 |
| [07:08] | Who got you a dvd of Precious, | 是谁帮你搞到了由萨菲尔的小说《推》 |
| [07:10] | based on the novel Push, by Sapphire, | 改编的电影《珍爱》的DVD |
| [07:11] | and a copy of the novel Push autographed by Sapphire? | 连同萨菲尔亲笔签名版的《推》 |
| [07:14] | Abed. | 阿布蒂 |
| [07:15] | All we had was dumb reality before we met that man. | 遇见他之前 我们都活在没劲的现实中 |
| [07:18] | And he’s made all of our lives better than reality. | 有了他 生活就美好得多 |
| [07:20] | Now it becomes a little inconvenient, | 现在就出了这么一小点状况 |
| [07:22] | and it’s time to get real? | 你们就又要转回现实了吗 |
| [07:24] | For shame! | 丢人 |
| [07:26] | He’s right. Sorry, Troy. | 他说得对 对不起 特洛伊 |
| [07:30] | Hey, guys. | 伙计们 |
| [07:30] | Abed, we would be happy to help you out. | 阿布蒂 我们很愿意帮忙 |
| [07:33] | It’ll be a good time. | 会很有意思的 |
| [07:34] | – Cool. Cool, cool, cool, – Cool. | -好 好好好 -好 |
| [07:36] | – Oprah. – Oh, thank you. | -奥普拉 -谢谢 |
| [07:38] | – See ya, Vin. – Fat Brando. | -回见 文 -发福白兰度 |
| [07:39] | – Burt Reynolds. – Yeah. | -伯特·雷诺兹 -好吧 |
| [07:42] | Thanks for being flexible. This’ll be fun. | 多谢通融 肯定会很好玩的 |
| [07:44] | Fun. Yeah, sure. But here’s the deal. | 好玩 好吧 不过我丑话说前头 |
| [07:47] | Um, if you guys mess this up, | 你们要是搞砸了 |
| [07:49] | Then his debt is overdue. | 他那笔帐就算逾期未付 |
| [07:51] | And I don’t send another bill. | 我呢 也懒得再算账了 |
| [07:53] | No, I send two guys that look a lot | 我就派两个人来 |
| [07:55] | Like Ving Rhames and Michael Chiklis. | 俩人长得跟文·瑞姆斯和迈克尔·切克利斯一样 |
| [07:58] | And they do a very convincing impression | 要说打断腿这种戏码 |
| [08:00] | of breaking your friend’s legs. | 他俩演得可好了 |
| [08:03] | Their secret is… They actually break them. | 秘诀是啥 人家实打实地真打 |
| [08:15] | All right, impersonators, | 好了 明星脸们 |
| [08:16] | our guest of honor is one Howie Schwartz, | 最尊贵的客人就一位 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [08:19] | Who, according to the Talmud, | 根据犹太礼教 |
| [08:20] | just became a man. But I have to say, | 他今天成年 不过要我说呢 |
| [08:23] | I wouldn’t want him next to me in a foxhole. | 小哥们还是奶娃一个 |
| [08:25] | Ground rules– | 基本守则 |
| [08:26] | do stay in your assigned quadrants | 根据划分好的区域 大家画地为牢 |
| [08:28] | Quoting lines from movies you are positive | 别忘时不时来上一句 |
| [08:31] | that your impersonatee was in. | 你们模仿的人说过的电影台词 |
| [08:33] | Do not leave your quadrant, | 不要离开你们的负责区域 |
| [08:35] | burp, fart, cough, hiccup, or cuss. | 打嗝放屁 咳嗽骂人 通通禁止 |
| [08:37] | The obvious exception being James, | 当然吉姆斯除外 |
| [08:39] | our resident Walter Matthau. | 他扮演沃尔特·马修 |
| [08:40] | How you doing, Jimmy? | 吉米 感觉怎么样 |
| [08:41] | Aw, you give ’em hell. | 你爱咋咋样 |
| [08:43] | All right, let’s go. | 伙计们 走吧 |
| [08:44] | – All my life I has to fight. – I’m ready to tangle. | -生命不息 战斗不止 -放马过来吧 |
| [08:48] | Handsome Seacrest, I need you in this tux. | 美偶第一帅 穿上这件礼服 |
| [08:51] | Jeff, do not wear that. | 杰夫 不要穿 |
| [08:52] | Aw, zip it, white Jacko. | 闭嘴 白皮杰克逊 |
| [08:54] | Don’t worry, that thing in the cafeteria freaked me out, | 别担心 那天在食堂我被吓得不轻 |
| [08:57] | so I talked to my shrink, | 所以我跟心理医生谈过后 |
| [08:58] | and she doubled my dosage. | 她把药量加倍了 |
| [08:59] | What? Jeff, that’s insane! | 啥 杰夫 这太疯狂了 |
| [09:01] | I thought so too, but after I took that extra pill, | 我一开始也这么想 但吃了加量药后 |
| [09:03] | it seemed like a great idea. | 顿时觉得一身轻松 |
| [09:05] | – Jeff, put it on. Go. – No, Jeff! | -杰夫 穿好出发 -不 杰夫 |
| [09:08] | Britta, stop arguing. | 布雷塔 别吵了 |
| [09:09] | If you have anything else to say, | 你要想说什么 |
| [09:10] | say it in a high-pitched voice while walking backwards. | 就边滑太空步边尖着嗓子嚎 |
| [09:12] | Jeff is in grave danger. | 杰夫现在危在旦夕 |
| [09:18] | Uh, may I help you? | 请先留步 |
| [09:19] | I’m one of the impersonators. | 我是超级明星脸 |
| [09:22] | Which one? | 哪个明星 |
| [09:23] | Do I have to say it? | 非要我挑明了吗 |
| [09:26] | Burt Reynolds. | 伯特·雷诺兹啊 |
| [09:28] | Uh, yeah, I don’t believe anybody hired you | 好吧 我真心觉得没人肯雇你 |
| [09:30] | to impersonate Burt Reynolds. | 模仿伯特·雷诺兹 |
| [09:31] | – Why not? – Do I have to say it? | -为什么 -非要我挑明了吗 |
| [09:46] | – May I help you? – I’m Brando. | -你好 -我是白兰度 |
| [09:51] | Could be under “Fat.” | 前缀 “发福” |
| [09:56] | Totally. | 太像了啊 |
| [09:56] | Go on in. | 快请进 |
| [10:02] | Abed, get back to your station. | 阿布蒂 快回你的位置 |
| [10:03] | I can’t right now, I’m talking to Geena Davis. | 现在没空 我跟吉娜·戴维斯聊天呢 |
| [10:05] | Abed, we have to do this right | 阿布蒂 我们得按指挥来 |
| [10:06] | or Vinnie won’t clear your debt. | 要不你的债就还不清了 |
| [10:08] | Troy, who cares about money? | 特洛伊 谈钱多没劲啊 |
| [10:09] | Look around. This is why we’re alive. | 快瞧瞧啊 这里活力四射 |
| [10:11] | Ooh, fake Lorenzo Lamas. Let’s go. | 伪洛伦佐·拉马斯 咱们走 |
| [10:13] | I was so sad to hear of your passing. | 听闻你英年早逝 我深表悲痛 |
| [10:18] | Me too. | 我也一样 |
| [10:20] | Sergeant Chang, what are you doing here? | 昌警官 你在这干什么呢 |
| [10:23] | Hey, Annie. | 你好啊 安妮 |
| [10:24] | Just one of the perks when your brother’s a Rabbi. | 有个犹太教士哥哥 就是有这么点好处啦 |
| [10:26] | He throws me some private security gigs | 他主持的仪式会让我负责 |
| [10:28] | at the events he officiates. | 相关安保工作 |
| [10:30] | They can get really intense sometimes. | 这帮子有时可真够彪悍的 |
| [10:32] | Can you believe some jerk brought a scalpel to a bris? | 你相信居然有混蛋带着手术刀参加割礼吗 |
| [10:36] | Now smile. | 笑一个 |
| [10:39] | Why is he out of his quadrant? | 他怎么擅离职守 |
| [10:43] | I’m Lorenzo Lamas. | 我是洛伦佐·拉马斯 |
| [10:44] | – He’s reenacting a movie. – Please. | -他们这是电影情节重现 -别扯淡 |
| [10:47] | What movie were Jamie Lee Curtis | 我怎么不知道杰米·李·柯蒂斯 |
| [10:48] | and Lorenzo Lamas in together? | 和洛伦佐·拉马斯一起演过电影 |
| [10:50] | See, now I’m just embarrassed for you | 真为你的无知感到可耻 |
| [10:52] | because you’ve never seen Lorenzo’s Oil. | 你连洛伦佐演的《石油》都没看过 |
| [10:54] | Lorenzo is an oil tycoon | 洛伦佐演一个石油大亨 |
| [10:55] | that gets his address book switched | 他和杰米·李·柯蒂斯 |
| [10:57] | with Jamie Lee Curtis’, | 相互拿错了地址簿 |
| [10:59] | and they give each other piggyback rides. | 他们还轮流背着对方跑 |
| [11:03] | I can’t believe– did you go to college? | 老天啊 你没上过大学吗 |
| [11:04] | Yes. | 当然 |
| [11:06] | No. | 木有 |
| [11:07] | Whatever. Keep working. | 管他的 继续干活 |
| [11:15] | Oh, my God. You are gorgeous! | 我的天呐 你太帅了 |
| [11:19] | Would you look at this one. | 瞧这帅小伙 |
| [11:20] | He’s like a Robert Redford. | 活脱脱的罗伯特·雷德福 |
| [11:22] | No, no, more like a taller, hotter Ryan Seacrest. | 不对 他是增高更帅版的美偶主持 |
| [11:25] | It’s amazing, you’re actually more handsome than the guy | 比起那个以帅独步江湖的小子 |
| [11:27] | who’s famous for being handsome. | 你可比他帅多了 |
| [11:36] | Skull Cracker 2000. Top of the line. | 开颅神棍2000版 顶级货色 |
| [11:40] | – Who wants to hold it? – Me! | -谁想来拿拿 -我 |
| [11:42] | – That’s so cool. – Awesome. | -这玩意太酷了 -棒极了 |
| [11:44] | Dude, this is so sick. | 伙计 这玩意太猛了 |
| [11:46] | Check this out. | 快瞧瞧 |
| [11:52] | Any of you fine young men interested in a college credit? | 有没有想赚大学学分的好小伙 |
| [11:55] | – Sure! – Right! | -当然想 -想啊 |
| [12:03] | Look, man, if you have a request. | 伙计 点歌别找我 |
| [12:04] | Not a real DJ, okay. These are just props. | 我是冒牌DJ 这些都是道具 |
| [12:06] | You look like a friend of mine. | 你太像我的一个朋友了 |
| [12:08] | You’re friends with Moby? | 你那朋友很像莫比吗 |
| [12:21] | Jeff! | 杰夫 |
| [12:25] | I haven’t been dipped like that | 我离婚以后还从没这么 |
| [12:27] | since my last divorce. | 春心荡漾过呢 |
| [12:29] | Britta, you were right. | 布雷塔 被你说中了 |
| [12:31] | I can feel my ego taking over. Do something! | 我的自负在膨胀 快救救我 |
| [12:33] | Okay, listen to me. | 听好了 |
| [12:34] | You are not that big of a deal. Do you understand? | 你其实没什么了不起 懂吗 |
| [12:37] | You have bad posture. | 你的身姿糟糕无比 |
| [12:39] | When you do to many push-ups, it looks like you have boobs. | 俯卧撑做太多 搞得你胸肌似巨乳 |
| [12:42] | The tile in your bathroom is tacky. | 你家浴室里的瓷砖恶俗之至 |
| [12:44] | You were emotionally closed off in bed. | 你在床上封闭自我 全无感情 |
| [12:46] | To the point where. One time, I didn’t come up | 说到这个 有一回我完全没快感 |
| [12:48] | because I couldn’t find close enough parking. | 因为咱俩距离太远 根本没合成体 |
| [12:50] | You have an unusually high butt crack. | 你的腚沟也裂得无比之高 |
| [12:54] | Thank you. | 谢谢你 |
| [12:56] | It couldn’t have been easy for you to lie like that. | 撒这么多谎 真是太难为你了 |
| [12:58] | We are getting you out of here. | 我带你抓紧离开这里 |
| [13:00] | Get back to your quadrant. Now! | 快回你的负责区域 赶紧的 |
| [13:02] | Britta! | 布雷塔 |
| [13:04] | Honey, you were the highlight of the evening. | 宝贝 你就是今晚的闪亮之星 |
| [13:06] | If it were up to me, you’d win every single award. | 如果我是评委 所有奖项都要归你 |
| [13:10] | There’s awards? | 还有奖项吗 |
| [13:17] | Ladies and gentlemen, | 女士们先生们 |
| [13:18] | welcome to Howie Schwartz’s bar mitzvah awards. | 欢迎参加豪伊·施沃茨的成年礼颁奖现场 |
| [13:22] | Here to present the first award | 颁发第一个奖项的嘉宾 |
| [13:24] | are fake Morgan Freeman and fake Bono. | 是伪摩根·弗里曼和山寨博诺 |
| [13:27] | You know, fake Bono, algebra can be tough. | 山寨博诺 代数很难学啊 |
| [13:29] | It sure can, fake Morgan Freeman. | 千真万确 伪摩根·弗里曼 |
| [13:31] | And that’s why it’s so important | 所以说应该嘉奖 |
| [13:32] | to reward those to whom it comes so easily. | 轻松搞定代数的人 |
| [13:35] | The winner for best math student is… | 最佳数学学生的得主是 |
| [13:39] | Howie Schwartz. | 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [13:47] | Wow, these things are heavy. | 这奖杯还挺沉呢 |
| [13:50] | The award for Cleanest Room goes to Howie Schwartz. | 获得卫生标兵奖的是 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [13:54] | Coolest Skateboard Trick, Howie Schwartz! | 最炫滑板玩家奖 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [13:58] | Best Halo Score Score, Howie Schwartz! | 《光晕》最佳玩家奖 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [14:05] | If you ask me, I think you’re gonna win the award | 接下来这个奖毫无疑问是你的啊 |
| [14:07] | for Most Handsome Young Man. | 全场最帅男青年啊 |
| [14:09] | Nah. Oh, give me a break. It’s his Bar Mitzvah. | 别开玩笑了 这是人家的成人礼 |
| [14:12] | Jeff, I think that we should go. | 杰夫 我们该走了 |
| [14:15] | There’s an award for Most Handsome Young Man! | 还有个奖没颁呢 是给最帅男青年的 |
| [14:18] | Hello, everyone. | 大家晚上好 |
| [14:19] | It is my honor and privilege as fake Oprah Winfrey | 身为山寨奥普拉·温弗里 我万分荣幸地 |
| [14:22] | to present the night’s final award– | 颁发今晚最后的一个奖项 |
| [14:24] | Most Handsome Young Man. | 最帅的男青年 |
| [14:27] | And the winner is… | 获奖者是 |
| [14:31] | Howie Schwartz! | 豪伊·施沃茨 |
| [14:33] | Nooo! | 不可以 |
| [14:54] | Look at me! Look at meee! | 看着我 都看着我啊 |
| [14:58] | No, Jeffrey! Jeffrey–oh! | 不 杰夫瑞 快停下 |
| [15:02] | Oh, God, no! | 哦 天啊 |
| [15:04] | – What the hell? – You wanted it! | -你搞什么呢 -这不是你想要的吗 |
| [15:07] | You all want it! | 你们都想要吧 |
| [15:34] | I love you, dad! | 我爱你 老爸 |
| [15:35] | I knew you’d invite the Hulk! | 我就知道你肯定会请绿巨人的 |
| [15:44] | You’re lucky. | 算你走运 |
| [15:46] | And your friend’s debt is paid. | 你朋友的债也算是还清了 |
| [15:48] | Hey, Jimmy, wait up. | 吉米 等一等 |
| [15:57] | Boogie Nights. | 《一夜成名》 |
| [16:01] | You’re fat Burt Reynolds, right? | 你是发福版伯特·雷诺兹 对吧 |
| [16:04] | I’ll take it. | 承让承让 |
| [16:14] | Abed, your leg! What’d they do? | 阿布蒂 你的腿 他们怎么着你了 |
| [16:16] | Tell me who they looked like! | 告诉我他们长什么样啊 |
| [16:18] | Knock, knock! Who’s there? | 叮咚叮咚 谁啊 |
| [16:19] | It’s your femur bone. He needs some money. He’s broke. | 是你的大腿骨 他受伤了 需要钱治疗 |
| [16:24] | Laughter’s the best medicine. | 微笑是最好的良药 |
| [16:27] | What are– what are you doing? | 你在 你在做什么 |
| [16:28] | I’m challenging your entire medical establishment, sir. | 我向所有的医疗机构发出挑战 |
| [16:30] | Not you. | 没说你 |
| [16:34] | So we just spent our whole night paying off your debt, | 我们忙活了一晚上就为了帮你还债 |
| [16:37] | and you’re blowing money on a Patch Adams? | 你却又把钱浪费在山寨帕奇·亚当斯身上 |
| [16:39] | It’s two for one. We’re doing Popeye next. | 买一赠一 我们还要演大力水手呢 |
| [16:43] | Get him some spinach. | 给他来点儿菠菜 |
| [16:46] | I’m Olive Oyl. | 我是奥丽弗 |
| [16:53] | Get out! | 都给我滚 |
| [17:14] | Are you mad at me? | 你在生我的气吗 |
| [17:17] | – No. – Cool. | -没有 -那就好 |
| [17:19] | I was gonna go in the Dreamatorium | 我准备进幻梦空间 |
| [17:20] | and play Inspector Spacetime. | 然后重演《时空探长》 |
| [17:22] | Have fun. | 祝开心 |
| [17:29] | – Abed. – Yeah? | -阿布蒂 -干嘛 |
| [17:32] | Come here. | 你过来 |
| [17:41] | I am mad at you. | 我是在生你的气 |
| [17:42] | You said you weren’t. We never lie. | 你刚说你不生气 咱俩之间不说谎的 |
| [17:44] | – I know. – We made a deal. | -我知道 -我们之前说好了的 |
| [17:45] | October 15, 2009. Friends don’t lie to each other. | 2009年10月15日 朋友之间无谎言 |
| [17:47] | I know! I lied. | 我知道 我撒谎了 |
| [17:50] | Because you don’t like people who tell you what to do, | 因为你不喜欢别人告诉你应该做什么 |
| [17:51] | and I don’t want to be one of those people. | 而且我也不想成为那种人 |
| [17:53] | – Then don’t be. – I have to be. | -那就别做呗 -但我必须做 |
| [17:54] | You have to stop renting celebrity impersonators. | 你不能再雇明星脸的群众演员了 |
| [17:56] | Vinnie was gonna break both of your legs. | 文尼本来想打断你的双腿的 |
| [17:58] | I had to work really hard to help you. | 我必须很努力地表演去帮助你还债 |
| [18:00] | But that’s what you wanted to do. | 可你不是也挺想那样的吗 |
| [18:01] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [18:04] | But I can’t do what I want to do? | 我却不能做我想做的事了 |
| [18:04] | I guess not. Not all the time. | 恐怕不能 并不是每次都可以 |
| [18:06] | Sometimes you’re just gonna have to trust | 有些时候你必须得相信我 |
| [18:07] | – that I know better about stuff. – I don’t know if I can do that. | -有些事我比你明白 -我恐怕不能 |
| [18:10] | Then I guess you’re gonna have to trust | 那我觉得你必须得相信 |
| [18:12] | that you’re gonna have to trust me. | 你只能相信我了 |
| [18:16] | Well, I don’t want to stop being your friend, so… | 我不想和你终结友情 所以 |
| [18:20] | I guess I’ll let you tell me what to do sometimes. | 我想以后有时我会让你指点一二的 |
| [18:24] | Still best friends? | 还是死党吗 |
| [18:26] | Yeah. | 当然 |
| [18:29] | Still best friends. Always. | 还是铁哥们 永远的 |
| [18:32] | Cool. Cool, cool, cool. | 好 好好好 |
| [18:34] | You still gonna go to the Dreamatorium? | 要继续去幻梦空间吗 |
| [18:35] | Oh, yeah, but I think I’m gonna play by myself right now, | 是的 但现在我想一个人去 |
| [18:37] | If that’s okay. | 如果你不介意的话 |
| [18:39] | Cool. Okay. | 好的 没问题 |
| [18:48] | Seacrest Hulk, you’re the greatest! | 美偶绿主持 天下无敌 |
| [18:51] | Whoo! You rock, Seacrest Hulk! | 你最棒了 美偶绿主持 |
| [18:56] | I love you, Seacrest Hulk! | 我爱你 美偶绿主持 |
| [19:02] | You know, Seacrest Hulk, you’re a meshugener. | 美偶绿主持 你就是一疯子 |
| [19:21] | You okay? | 你还好吗 |
| [19:22] | No. I ruined a Bar Mitzvah. | 不 我毁了人家的成人礼 |
| [19:25] | I’m a bad person. | 我是个混蛋 |
| [19:26] | What you’re feeling is called shame. | 你现在的感觉叫羞愧 |
| [19:28] | It means you’re getting better. | 证明你的情况有所好转了 |
| [19:29] | You’re gonna be safe again once those pills wear off. | 一旦那些药片失效了你也就正常了 |
| [19:34] | Um, I was thinking… | 我在想 |
| [19:36] | You know that person that you study for your psych class? | 你不是在找你心理课的研究对象吗 |
| [19:41] | Maybe that should be me. | 或许我就是一个好例子 |
| [19:43] | Uh-uh. No way. | 不不不 你还不够格 |
| [19:44] | You are way out of my league, diagnostically speaking. | 从病理上说 你根本不够标准啊 |
| [19:46] | I’m gonna go with someone a little less complicated. | 我还想研究研究不太复杂的人格呢 |
| [19:49] | Like Abed. | 比如阿布蒂 |
| [20:14] | Where’s Troy? | 特洛伊去哪儿了 |
| [20:17] | In the other room. | 在另一个房间啊 |
| [20:18] | That’s okay. There are many advantages | 好吧 独自一人旅行 |
| [20:19] | of traveling by yourself. | 可是好处多多呢 |
| [20:20] | You can drive faster, change direction. | 你可以开得更快 随意改方向 |
| [20:22] | And the only pee breaks are yours. | 上厕所时间都是你一个人的 |
| [20:26] | – Are you real? – Are you? | -你是真的吗 -你呢 |
| [20:28] | This is really crazy. | 这简直太疯狂了 |
| [20:29] | And inaccessible, and maybe too dark. | 而且也说不通啊 可能是太暗了吧 |
| [20:31] | Maybe to them, but not to us. | 对他们管用 对咱们可不一定 |
| [20:34] | Cool. Cool, cool, cool. | 好 好好好 |
| [20:37] | Hot. Hot, hot, hot. | 热 热热热 |
| [21:02] | Gentlemen, | 同志们 |
| [21:04] | who is ready to Chang the world? | 谁是世界之王 全球之霸呀 |
| [21:06] | Chang! Chang! Chang! | 昌昌昌 放光芒 |
| [21:09] | Chang! Chang! Chang! | 昌昌昌 放光芒 |
| [21:12] | Chang! Chang! Chang! | 昌昌昌 放光芒 |
| [21:14] | All hail Chang! | 昌王万岁 |