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克拉克森的农场(Clarkson’s Farm)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 克拉克森的农场(Clarkson’s Farm)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
目录
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08
时间 英文 中文
[00:06] [theme music playing]
[00:08] 克拉克森的农场
[00:11] 第十章 畏缩
[00:24] [pastoral music]
[00:38] [Jeremy] The day after the cows arrived, I went to check on them with Kaleb, 奶牛到达后的第二天 我和卡莱布一起去看奶牛
[00:42] who was actually quite excited. 他很兴奋
[00:45] [Jeremy] How old were you when you started as a cowman? 你几岁开始养奶牛?
[00:48] – [Kaleb] Thirteen. – Thirteen? – 十三岁 – 十三岁?
[00:49] [Kaleb] Thirteen. 十三
[00:51] – [Jeremy] You love them, don’t you? – Oh a hundred percent. – 你很喜欢它们 对吗? – 百分百地爱
[00:53] [Jeremy] Look at that. This is exactly what we need for the soil. 看这个 我们的土壤就需要这个
[00:57] Now that is full of nitrogen. 里面富含氮
[01:00] That goes into the soil, and that is good. – 对土壤很好 – 是的
[01:02] Yeah. And saves us having to put nitrogen on. 省了我们给化肥添加
[01:05] – Chemicals on. – Chemicals, yeah. – 氮 – 化肥 没错
[01:07] – Look who’s here. Stranger. – [Kaleb] Here she is, back. 看看谁来了 陌生人
[01:10] – 她回来了 – 从爱尔兰回来看望妈妈
[01:11] [Jeremy] Back from Ireland, over to see the mother.
[01:14] [Kaleb] Come and look at this turd. 快来看看这坨屎!欢迎回来
[01:15] – Welcome back. – [laughs]
[01:18] [Kaleb] Cow pat. 牛粪 等它们变硬以后 就可以把它们当做飞盘
[01:19] You know when they get really hard you can frisbee them.
[01:23] Is that a game you play in your rural… – 这是你们在农村玩的游戏… – 是的
[01:24] – Yeah. We actually did. – Oh!
[01:26] When they get hard, you can pick them up and frisbee 变硬后就可以捡起来 扔得最远的获胜
[01:28] and whoever chucks it the furthest wins.
[01:30] How was Ireland? – 爱尔兰怎么样? – 非常棒!
[01:32] – It was so good. – Good.
[01:33] – I hadn’t seen my mum for two years. – I know. – 我已经两年没见妈妈了 – 我知道!
[01:36] – I’m so sorry about your dog, Kaleb. – Oh yeah, yesterday. 我为你的狗感到难过 卡莱布
[01:38] I’m so sorry. – 是的 就在昨天 – 我很遗憾
[01:41] Cancer all down the side of his face. Put him down yesterday. 脸上长癌 昨天安乐死了
[01:43] I’ve never put down a dog 我从来没有安乐死过 一条还能四处乱跑玩耍的狗
[01:44] that is running around and trying to play.
[01:47] It was horrible. He was just… it was horrible. 太可怕了
[01:49] – [Lisa] I’m so sorry. – He’s in a better place now. – 我很难过 – 它现在在一个更好的地方
[01:51] And we’ll cheer him up ’cause he likes cows. 奶牛会让他振作起来的
[01:55] [Jeremy] Cows! – 奶牛! – 不 不要吓唬它们
[01:56] [Lisa] No, don’t scare them.
[01:58] [Jeremy] I’m not gonna scare them. I’m just saying “cows.” 我不是要吓唬它们 我只是说“奶牛”
[02:01] There they are. 它们在那边
[02:03] [mooing]
[02:04] – [Lisa] Oh. – [Jeremy] Ow.
[02:07] [Lisa] Oh, hello. 你好 它们的味道可真好闻
[02:08] They smell divine.
[02:10] [soft music]
[02:12] [Jeremy] Whilst Lisa and Kaleb were introducing themselves… 当丽莎和卡莱布自我介绍时…
[02:16] [Kaleb] Look at them, they’re so relaxed. 看看它们 它们很放松 嘿!
[02:18] Hey !
[02:19] [Jeremy] …Dilwyn the vet arrived. 兽医迪尔翁来了
[02:22] – [Jeremy] How’ve you been? – Yeah, not too bad. – 最近如何? – 还不错
[02:24] Just sort of having to fight all the autograph hunters away 必须躲着那些要签名的人 诸如此类的
[02:27] and all that type of stuff, but…
[02:29] [Kaleb calls the cows]
[02:31] [Dilwyn] Where are we here? 我们这是在哪?
[02:32] [Lisa] Jeremy? They’re trying to get over the fence. 杰里米?它们想越过栅栏
[02:35] [Jeremy] What? [mooing] 什么
[02:37] – [wood cracking] – [Kaleb] Oh fucking hell! – 真该死 – 它穿过去了
[02:39] [Lisa] Now through the fence.
[02:41] – [Kaleb] Cows are out! – [Lisa] Jeremy. – 奶牛出去了! – 不!真糟糕!
[02:42] [Jeremy] Oh shit! They’ll be on the road.
[02:43] – 它们会跑到马路上 – 我的天啊
[02:45] [Lisa] Oh my God.
[02:46] The road is up there and there’s no fence. 那边是马路 没有栅栏
[02:49] – [Kaleb] Go on! – [Jeremy] For heavens… Please stop. – 快跑! – 天啊 拜托 快停下
[02:52] [Kaleb] Go on!
[02:53] Lisa, come that side! 丽莎 到那边去
[02:57] [Jeremy] No, they’re going back, they’re just… 不!它们回去了… 该死的
[02:58] Oh for fucking hell!
[03:01] [Kaleb] There’s a gate in that corner. We’ll walk them down there. 那个角落有一个门 我们引它们去那儿 去打开门
[03:03] – Jeremy, go and open that gate. – Yeah.
[03:05] [Kaleb] If one goes through, they’ll all go through it. 如果有一个过去 剩下所有的都会跟过去
[03:08] We just slowly take them down there, really slowly. – 我们只要慢慢地引它们去 – 我懂了
[03:11] [Jeremy] Got you.
[03:13] Come on, cows. – 过来吧 奶牛们 – 稳稳地
[03:14] [Kaleb] Steady.
[03:16] Steady. – 稳稳地 – 好姑娘
[03:18] [Jeremy] Good girls.
[03:19] [Dilwyn] Yeah, they’re going through. – 它们过去了 – 好姑娘 过来
[03:21] [Kaleb] Good girls, come on.
[03:23] We’ve had them a day. 这些奶牛来我们这已经一整天了
[03:25] One day.
[03:29] [Jeremy] Having got the cows back in their field and mended the fence, 把奶牛们赶回牧场里 还修了栅栏
[03:35] I was worried that they’d be just as unruly as the sheep, 我担心它们像羊一样不守规矩
[03:38] but Dilwyn explained what was going on. 但迪尔翁解释了刚刚的事
[03:42] There’s a hierarchy. – 牛群里有等级制度 – 真的吗?
[03:45] – [Jeremy] Really ? – Yeah, there is. So there’ll be a chief cow in there? – 是的 – 有一头牛是首领
[03:48] Oh absolutely. The one that broke through the fence. – 嗯 – 可能就是刚刚冲出来的那头
[03:51] – Probably was. And they all know where they are in the… 或许是 它们都知道它们所处的… – Probably was.
[03:54] – Pecking order? Really ? – Yeah. – 阶级位置 真的吗? – 是的
[03:56] And they don’t tend to argue then, 它们不爱争吵 一切都很和气
[03:58] and everything goes really, really nicely.
[04:01] I never knew that. So with cows, whichever one leads, 所以对于奶牛来说 谁先抵达这 谁就是领袖
[04:05] like when they first get here, “I’m in charge.”
[04:07] – [Dilwyn] Yeah. – And they just go “OK.” – 它们都会“同意”? – 是的
[04:09] Yeah. And the others are quite happy to follow. 其他奶牛很乐意跟随 这是牛群的本能反应
[04:11] That’s what cattle are like, that’s the herd instinct.
[04:13] You know, even down to sort of zebus jumping off a cliff, 即便是试着跳下悬崖
[04:18] or trying to cross the Zambezi, or whatever. 穿过赞比西河的瘤牛群也是如此
[04:21] They’ll all stand there saying “You go first, you go first.” 一些说“你先走” 然后其中一头说 “我要走了” 剩下的都将跟随它
[04:23] And then somebody says: “Right, I’m going.”
[04:24] And the whole bloomin’ lot go.
[04:26] So that’s why, it’s hardwired into them. 这是它们的天性
[04:29] [Jeremy] They go under the trees because? 它们到这树底下是为什么?
[04:32] [Dilwyn] They feel safe under there. 它们在这感到安全 远离捕食者
[04:34] They’re away from the predators.
[04:36] [Lisa moos]
[04:41] [Jeremy] This is Pepper. The white one. 这是胡椒 白色的那头 是我的宠物
[04:43] This is my pet.
[04:45] The little five-year-old girl, Rosie, from the farm we bought them from, 我们买奶牛的那个农场 有个小女孩罗西 她最喜欢胡椒
[04:48] that was her favourite.
[04:49] So she said: “Will you ask Jeremy to really look after Pepper for me?” 她说:“请替我照顾好胡椒”
[04:53] – [Lisa] Ha. – I don’t know. So I said I would. 我说我会的
[04:57] [upbeat music]
[05:01] [Jeremy] I’d bought the cows to reinvigorate my soil. 我买奶牛来恢复我的土地
[05:04] But because such a small flock would not be profitable 但如果我把它们卖给屠夫 这一小群牛也没什么利润
[05:08] if I sold it to a butcher,
[05:09] I’d come up with the idea of selling the meat 于是我想在自己的餐厅里卖
[05:12] in my own restaurant.
[05:14] And on that front, I’d had another brainwave… 在这方面 我有了另一个主意
[05:19] chilis! 辣椒
[05:20] – 对 – 就在这边
[05:21] – Right over here. – [Lisa] Oh, oh…
[05:23] [Jeremy] My plan was to grow them so I could sell chili chutney 我计划种植辣椒
[05:25] 这样我就可以在餐厅和农场商店里 卖辣椒酸辣酱
[05:27] in both the restaurant and the farm shop.
[05:31] [Jeremy] Clever, eh? 很不错 不是吗?
[05:34] That’ll do. 可以的
[05:35] [Kaleb] I’d say it goes like that. – 看 就是这样 – 好
[05:38] There.
[05:40] [Jeremy] So Kaleb and I built two polytunnels. 我和卡莱布一起搭建了两个塑料大棚
[05:44] [upbeat music continues]
[05:49] And then I had to choose what sort of chilies to grow in them. 然后我要选择种什么样的辣椒
[05:56] This is a habanero, 这是哈瓦那辣椒 在斯科维尔辣度表上的值是
[05:58] which on the Scoville heat scale scores…
[06:01] between 150,000 and 325,000, 15万到32万5千之间 这意味着它非常辣
[06:04] which means it’s pretty damn hot.
[06:15] Hmm…
[06:16] That’s pretty nice, actually. 很不错
[06:19] Now that was 150,000, thereabouts, on the Scoville scale. 这个在斯科维尔辣度表上的值 大约是15万
[06:22] This one, this is a Naga.
[06:23] 这是娜迦辣椒 130万
[06:24] This is 1.3 million.
[06:33] Oh… OK. 好的
[06:35] Right.
[06:37] Hmm…
[06:40] Hmm…
[06:42] Oh! 天啊
[06:48] Holy shit! 我的天啊!
[06:50] That’s really hot. 这真的很辣
[06:56] Ah! Fucking hell! 辣死我了
[06:59] [burps] Oh, excuse me. 不好意思
[07:02] That’s just some sick coming up. 只是有点想吐
[07:05] Oh dear. 哦 亲爱的
[07:07] Oh my God, what are you doing? 天啊 你在忙活什么?
[07:11] What have you got? 你弄到了什么?
[07:12] [Jeremy] That might be a bit too hot. Do you want to try a bit? 这可能有点太辣了 想试试吗?
[07:16] [Lisa] Go on then. 来吧 它叫什么?
[07:17] What’s it called?
[07:18] – [Jeremy] Naga. – Naga. – 娜迦 – 娜迦?
[07:20] You’ve got to chew it ten times before you swallow it, 必须咀嚼10下 否则这会灼伤你的胃
[07:22] otherwise it burns your stomach.
[07:25] Yeah. Oh fuck, that’s hot already. 嗯 该死的 这就开始觉得辣了
[07:28] [laughs]
[07:31] Bit of a kick, hasn’t it? 有点辣 不是吗?
[07:32] [Jeremy laughs]
[07:35] Your arse in the morning is going to look like the Japanese flag. 明天早上你的屁股 会跟日本国旗一样
[07:41] [upbeat music]
[07:45] [Jeremy] In the end, we planted a selection. 最后 我们选了一种
[07:49] Mild, Hungarian habaneros, 温和的匈牙利哈瓦那辣椒
[07:53] eye-watering Nagas, 辣眼睛的娜迦
[07:56] and completely volcanic Carolina Reapers. 火辣的卡罗莱纳死神
[08:04] Then, with a bag of ripened Nagas in the boot, 接着 载着一袋成熟的娜迦
[08:07] I went off to create a Diddly Squat chili chutney. 我就出发去做迪丽斯库阿特酸辣酱了
[08:12] Sadly I’m not able to do the cooking in my own kitchen 我不能在自家的厨房里做饭 因为我的厨房警察
[08:15] because the kitchen police haven’t inspected it.
[08:18] 还没有检查过
[08:20] And that’s why I’ve come here. 这就是我来这里的原因
[08:26] 奇平诺顿橄榄球俱乐部
[08:28] This is where my boy used to play. 这是我儿子以前打球的地方
[08:31] Every Sunday I’d come and watch him for eight years. 八年了 我每周日都来看他打球
[08:34] [Jeremy] In the rugby club kitchen, which had passed the police exam, 橄榄球俱乐部的厨房 已经通过了卫生检查员的视察
[08:39] I met up with two chili cooking experts. 我在这里跟两位烹饪辣椒的专家见面
[08:41] – [Jeremy] Greetings. – Tomasz. – 你们好 – 塔玛斯
[08:43] – [Jeremy] Tomasz. Polish. – Yes. – 塔玛斯 波兰人? – 是的
[08:45] Joanna. – 乔安娜 – 你好吗?
[08:47] – How are you? – I’m doing fabulous. So we’re gonna make, I think, for you, 我现在很好 我们想要给你们
[08:50] a tomato-based chili sauce 制作一种番茄辣椒酱 里面加了大块的娜迦
[08:52] with chunky Naga in it
[08:54] and some chunky tomatoes, 还有大块的西红柿和洋葱
[08:57] chunky onions.
[08:58] – So not completely pureed. Yeah. – OK. – 大块的辣椒 – 所以是没有完全成糊状?
[09:00] – So there’s a crunch to it. – [Joanna] Yeah. – 有咀嚼感? – 是的
[09:03] We like the flavour of the malt vinegar with tomatoes. 我们喜欢麦芽醋和西红柿的味道 搭配在一起很美味
[09:07] It just goes so well together.
[09:09] – What we– – [coughs] – 我们… – 真该死
[09:10] [Jeremy] Fucking hell! [coughs]
[09:12] [Joanna] These chilies are really, really hot. 这辣椒真辣
[09:15] Shall we put the extractor fan on? 我们要不要打开排气扇?
[09:18] It is a bit noisy. 这声音有点大
[09:20] [Jeremy coughs] [Joanna coughs] 开一点
[09:25] [they laugh]
[09:28] I’m ten feet away from them. 我距离他们大概有三米远
[09:31] Oh my giddy aunt. – 真是吓我一跳 – 好吧
[09:33] [Joanna] OK.
[09:35] You’re managing to do very well there. – 你没问题 你没咳 – 我知道
[09:37] – You’re not coughing. – I know.
[09:38] Because you’re close, you don’t cough as much. 因为当你靠近时 就不会咳得那么厉害
[09:41] – Really? It’s just that I’m far away? – Try. – 真的吗?就因为我离得比较远? – 你试试
[09:44] [Joanna] What do you think of this… 你觉得这个怎么样?
[09:47] [coughs]
[09:51] What we’ve done is, we’ve taken the jars out of the oven 我们已经把罐子从烤箱里拿出来了 它们现在已经消好毒了
[09:54] and they’re nice and sterile now.
[09:56] How long does chili sauce keep for? – 辣椒酱能保存多久? – 所以…
[09:59] – So… – [coughs]
[10:00] The… [she coughs]
[10:02] roughly one year. 大约一年
[10:05] [they cough]
[10:08] [Joanna] OK, more chilies. 好的 再加些辣椒
[10:12] – [Joanna] More Naga. – [Tomasz] More cough. – 现在更多了 – 咳得也更厉害
[10:15] [Jeremy] How long have you been here, Tomasz? – 你来这多久了 塔玛斯? – 已经在这工作九年了
[10:18] Nine years. [coughs]
[10:19] Sorry, it’s because of the chili. 抱歉 我快…因为辣椒
[10:22] [laughs]
[10:24] [Jeremy] How many Poles do you get through in a year? 你一年能遇到多少波兰人?
[10:28] – [laughs] – [Tomasz coughs]
[10:30] – He’s very good. – And bad. – 他人很好 – 也很坏
[10:33] Sorry. 对不起
[10:35] [laughing and coughing]
[10:38] [Tomasz] Yeah, and… 嗯
[10:41] [laughing and coughing]
[10:43] [laughing]
[10:46] [soft music]
[10:50] [Jeremy] After that it was a relief to get back to the cow dung 之后回归牛粪 和我的短期高强度放牧土地恢复计划
[10:54] and my mob grazing soil rejuvenation plan. 就是种解脱
[10:58] Which requires not only a lot of faeces, 这不仅需要大量的粪便 还需要大量的母鸡
[11:01] but also a lot of hens.
[11:04] Come on girls, out you all come. 来吧 姑娘们 都出来
[11:06] Come on. 出来吧
[11:08] [Jeremy] And as my existing flock wasn’t big enough, 我目前养的不够多
[11:11] I got more from my egg-producing neighbours, Mr and Mrs Cacklebean, 我从生产鸡蛋的邻居 凯克斌夫妇那借来了一些
[11:16] who pitched up with a mobile henhouse that was so state of the art 他们装备了最先进的移动鸡舍
[11:20] it even had alloy wheels. 配有合金轮圈
[11:25] – [Steph] What do you think? – I’m amazed. – 你觉得怎么样? – 我很惊讶
[11:28] So high tech. 这么高科技 不会吧 但真的是!
[11:30] – [Steph laughs] – No, but it is!
[11:32] [Jeremy] So they roost… 所以它们住在…
[11:34] [Steph] On the bars in front of the nest boxes. 在巢箱前面的栏杆上 它们在巢箱中生蛋
[11:37] They should lay eggs in the nest boxes.
[11:39] [Jeremy] OK. Is this the water tank? 好的 这是水箱吗?
[11:42] [Steph] Yeah, cold water, so that goes through to the nipple drinkers, 是的 冷水流向乳头式饮水器 这样它们只要轻拍乳头就好
[11:46] so they tap the nipples.
[11:47] What man doesn’t like to tap a nipple? – 哪个男人不喜欢轻拍乳头? – 但它们是母的
[11:49] [Jeremy] But they’re women.
[11:51] Some women like to tap nipples. – 有些女人也喜欢轻拍乳头 – 我听说了!
[11:52] I’ve heard!
[11:54] Yeah, whoever wants to tap a nipple can tap a nipple. 不管谁想轻拍乳头 都可以轻拍乳头
[11:57] I once saw it on the internet. – 我在网上看到过 – 我希望你已经清除搜索历史了
[11:58] Oh, OK. I hope you cleared your search history.
[12:01] – What about the lighting? – All powered off the solar. – 照明怎么样? – 全都是太阳能供电
[12:05] It’s good, isn’t it? – So the whole thing is solar powered? – Yeah. – 全都是太阳能的? – 很好 不是吗?对
[12:09] – Steph? – [she laughs] 斯蒂芬 那是干什么用的?
[12:11] What’s that for?
[12:12] It’s a spot for foxes. Check the outside. 观察狐狸 查看外面的情况
[12:15] – That’s a fox spotting camera? – Fox spotting camera. 这是狐狸观察相机吗? 装有激光瞄准器吗?
[12:17] – Has it got laser targeting on it? – No, that’s over to you.
[12:19] 没有 这取决于你
[12:21] [Jeremy] Could I look at this on my phone? – 我可以在手机上看监控吗? – 你可以在你的手机上看
[12:22] You can, to make sure there’s nothing around.
[12:28] [Jeremy] Steph’s husband then arrived with my 50 new birds. 斯蒂芬的丈夫随后 给我带来了50只小鸡
[12:32] [shouts]
[12:34] [Steph] There you go, girls. 去吧 姑娘
[12:36] [Jeremy] They are beautiful looking hens, aren’t they? – 漂亮的母鸡 – 是的 漂亮
[12:38] [Steph] Yeah, they are.
[12:41] – OK. – That’s the way it goes. – 好的 – 就是这样
[12:44] [Jeremy] Next we erected the fencing, 然后我们竖起了栅栏
[12:46] which is essential in a mob grazing enterprise. 这对放牧场来说是必不可少的
[12:51] [Steph] Yeah, perfect. 是的 完美
[12:53] So here’s the idea. 我的想法就是这样 牛屎 牛屎 到处都是牛屎
[12:54] Cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit everywhere.
[12:59] Hens come out, peck the worms and… What else do they eat out of that? 把母鸡放出来 抓虫子… 还有什么来着?
[13:03] [Paddy] They eat all the bugs. – 它们会吃掉所有的虫子 – 把牛粪里的虫都吃掉
[13:05] [Jeremy] All the bugs out of the shit,
[13:07] and then trample all the cow poo and their own 将牛粪和它们自己的鸡屎
[13:10] into the soil, making it healthy and vibrant. 踩入土中 让土壤变得健康 生机勃勃
[13:13] And then tomorrow, we move them there. 然后明天 我们把它们赶到那边
[13:17] [Paddy] Yep. [Jeremy] And bit by bit, they cover the whole field. – 是的 – 一点一点 就会覆盖整个牧场
[13:19] [Paddy] Yeah.
[13:21] [Steph] It’s the way forward. – 这就是接下来要做的 – 我要打开门板
[13:22] [Jeremy] I’m gonna open the flap.
[13:24] Let the eco farming begin. 一起搞生态农业吧
[13:29] [Steph] Here they come. – 它们来了 – 看 它们已经在吃草了
[13:30] [Paddy] Here they come. See, they’re already grazing.
[13:33] [Jeremy] Look, it’s doing it! 看 它在啄虫子!
[13:35] It’s actually eating the worms out of the faeces! 实际上是在吃粪便中的虫子!
[13:38] [laughs] [Jeremy] That’s what we’re here for. That’s brilliant. – 我们的目的达到了 – 我们的目的达到了
[13:41] Look at that faeces, what a feast. 看那坨粪便 真是一场盛宴!
[13:44] He’s treading in it, but that’s OK. 它正踩在上面 但没关系
[13:47] Tread it, squidge it into the soil. Go on, squidge. 踩它 把它压进土里 继续 压它
[13:51] [Jeremy] Paddy and Steph had actually dropped off two sheds, 帕蒂和斯蒂芬已经盖了两个棚子
[13:54] and there was a bit of a surprise in the second one. 第二个里有惊喜
[13:58] You’ve got a cockerel shed as well. 我们还有一个公鸡棚
[14:00] – A what shed? – [Paddy] A cockerel shed. – 什么棚? – 公鸡棚
[14:03] A shed full of cockerels. – 棚子里全是公鸡 – 公鸡又不下蛋
[14:04] Why am I having cockerels when they don’t produce any eggs?
[14:06] 为什么还要养公鸡?
[14:10] So the idea is that the cockerels, 是公鸡还是你给它们生命 这是一个伦理上的问题
[14:12] you give them life, which is very ethical.
[14:15] ‘Cause most of the cockerels in this country get killed at a day old. 这个国家里大多数的公鸡 才长一天就被杀死了
[14:18] – A day? – A day old, yeah. – 一天? – 一天
[14:20] Hours old. – 那它们会怎样? – 它们死了
[14:21] Hours old. They’re dead.
[14:23] – What happens to them? – [Paddy] Most of them get thrown away. – 大多数小公鸡都被扔了 不是吗? – 是的 像垃圾一样
[14:25] – [Paddy] They’re waste. – [Steph] Waste products.
[14:28] Are these cockerels that I’m getting delicious and nutritious? 我养的这些小公鸡好吃、有营养吗?
[14:33] They’re lovely. 它们很可爱
[14:34] – So you can eat them? – Yes. – 它们可以吃? – 公鸡可以吃
[14:36] You can eat cock.
[14:41] [Jeremy] Here we go. The cockerels are arriving. 我们到了 公鸡送来了
[14:44] – 25 How many are there again? 25? – 有多少只公鸡?
[14:45] [Steph] 25.
[14:47] Oh, look at you! – 看这只! – 它很帅
[14:49] – [Steph] He’s handsome, eh? – [Jeremy] Oh yeah. 真不赖!真是有两下子
[14:50] He is walking the walk.
[14:53] – [Steph laughs] – [cockerel crowing]
[14:55] [Jeremy] This is going to be my new soundtrack to life, isn’t it? – 这将成为我生活的新配乐? – 是的
[14:57] [Paddy] It is.
[14:58] [cockerel crowing]
[15:00] [Jeremy] Bloody hell! The racket! 天啊 真刺耳
[15:03] – [cockerel crowing] – [Steph] The cows are coming.
[15:05] 牛来了
[15:06] [Jeremy] Thinking: “Oh no, there’s some small, feathered cows in our field.” 在想:“我们牧场里来了些 长着羽毛的小奶牛”
[15:12] [Jeremy] With all this in place, 有它们在我的牧场里 我的土壤会变得健康
[15:14] my soil would become healthy and I’d have a steady supply of chicken,
[15:16] 我能为餐厅持续提供鸡肉 鸡蛋和牛肉
[15:18] eggs and beef for the restaurant.
[15:22] So I went to bed that night 因此 那天夜里我满意地入睡
[15:24] feeling rather contented.
[15:32] 凌晨3点58分
[15:35] [cockerel crowing]
[15:38] [crowing continues]
[15:45] The next morning, however, I wasn’t feeling quite so contented, 然而 第二天早上 我就觉得不太满意了
[15:49] because it turned out the cockerels were incredible escape artists. 因为事实证明 公鸡是杰出的逃脱艺术家
[15:55] You… They’re all out. 你…它们都跑出去了 所有的公鸡都跑出去了
[15:57] All the cockerels are out.
[15:58] – [crowing] – Fucking! 该死的…
[16:00] [Jeremy] Which meant they either ended up as fox food… 也就说它们要么已经 沦为狐狸的盘中餐…
[16:04] [Jeremy] The feathers are everywhere, look. 看 到处都是羽毛
[16:07] It’s like the killing fields. 就像屠宰场一样
[16:09] [Jeremy] Or they were over at the hen house, 或者它们就在鸡舍里扮演罗杰摩尔
[16:11] giving it the full Roger Moore.
[16:14] Right, come on, girls, out you all come. 来吧 姑娘们 出来吧
[16:18] Oh look, look! What! 看!怎么回事?
[16:24] You are cornered, you’re going down. 你没路走了 你完蛋了
[16:27] You’re not going down. 没完蛋
[16:31] Where’s that bloody cockerel? 那只该死的公鸡去哪了?
[16:35] Oh, there’s two in here. 这里有两只 不 是三只!
[16:37] No, there’s three.
[16:38] Oh my Christ, it’s an orgy! 天啊 野性的狂欢啊!
[16:41] Stop it! Got it, no I haven’t. Missed it. 停下 我抓到了 不 没抓着 给它溜了
[16:45] Oh shit! 全都是…该死的
[16:49] [Jeremy] But leaving aside the cockerel delinquency, 但抛开公鸡的恶行不谈
[16:52] the cows and the hens were already making a good team. 奶牛和母鸡已组成了一个很好的团队
[16:56] Straight into the faeces. 看看它们 直接踩到粪便上 看 抓大便 看!
[16:58] Look, scratching it. Look.
[17:00] You good hen. 你是一只好母鸡 我会颁给你一个生态铜牌 没错
[17:02] You’re gonna get an eco bronze medal you are.
[17:05] [lively music]
[17:12] [Jeremy] Later that day, I headed to the farm shop. 那天晚些时候 我去了农场商店
[17:15] Greetings, everybody. 大家好
[17:18] [Jeremy] My first batch of chili chutneys were ready, 因为我的第一批辣椒酱已经做好了
[17:21] and I wanted to do a bit of customer research. 我想调查一下客户
[17:25] Anyone here like chili? – 有人喜欢辣椒吗? – 有
[17:27] – [customers] Yeah. – [man] I love chili.
[17:28] Coming through. 借过
[17:29] [Jeremy] It’s like a 1970s Yorkshire wedding. 看 这就像上世纪70年代 约克郡的婚礼
[17:33] [Jeremy] First of all I asked people 首先 我请人们品尝中辣的版本
[17:35] to try the medium hot version.
[17:38] That’s good. – 好吃 – 好吃?
[17:40] – [Jeremy] Good. So you’d buy that? – I’d buy that. – 你会买吗? – 会
[17:43] It’s all right. It’s quite nice. 挺好的
[17:45] – 只是挺好? – 很不错
[17:47] – Very nice. I would buy that. – [Jeremy] Good. – 不错 我会买的 – 很好
[17:49] I think we’re onto something there. 很好 我们有特别的发现
[17:52] [Jeremy] Buoyed by this reaction, I then asked them to try 大家的反应鼓舞了我 于是我继续让大家来品尝极端版本
[17:54] the not medium version.
[17:58] Holy shit! 天啊
[18:00] [he laughs]
[18:03] Fucking hell! 这什么啊
[18:04] [laughter]
[18:07] [laugher]
[18:12] It’s ridiculous. 这也太辣了
[18:14] [Jeremy laughs]
[18:17] Jesus Christ. Oh! 我的天啊!
[18:22] Drink. 喝下去
[18:24] [Lisa] I think we’re gonna sell a lot of milk. – 我想我们会卖出很多牛奶 – 是的
[18:29] [Jeremy] Oh dear. Oh dear. [laughs] – 就这样 – 天呐
[18:31] [Lisa] More milk’s on the way. – 马上多拿些牛奶来 – 谢谢
[18:34] [soft music]
[18:44] 凌晨4点01分
[18:46] [cockerels crowing]
[18:50] [Jeremy] Our new early morning alarm system was actually coming in useful, 随着奶牛的照养工作越来越忙碌
[18:55] as life with the cows was getting… 我们全新的闹钟系统其实挺有用的
[18:58] much busier.
[18:59] [upbeat music]
[19:01] The calves, for example, were now old enough 小牛已经足够大了 可以断奶了
[19:04] to be weaned off their mother’s milk,
[19:06] which meant taking them to another field on the far side of the farm. 应该把它们带到农场另一端的 另一个牧场里了
[19:13] Look at all this new, fresh grass we have given them. 看看我们给它们喂的这些新鲜的草
[19:16] This is called Cow Ground. 这里被称为牛场 是农场里最漂亮的牧场之一
[19:18] It’s one of the prettiest fields on the farm.
[19:20] Yes, what do you think of that? 是啊 你怎么看?
[19:23] [mooing]
[19:25] [Lisa] They seem happy enough. – 它们看起来很开心 – 看这美丽的景象
[19:26] Look at that. Isn’t that a lovely sight?
[19:28] [Lisa] Yeah. – 难道不美吗? – 美
[19:30] [Jeremy] Unfortunately, however, 然而 很不幸 它们对新家并没有这种浪漫的看法
[19:32] the youngsters didn’t share this romantic view of their new home.
[19:40] [thunder rumbling] 第二天
[19:42] What is missing from this picture? 这画面中缺少了什么?
[19:46] All the veals, they’ve escaped. 所有的小牛都逃走了
[19:49] A neighbouring farmer has eight of them 隔壁农民院子里有八头
[19:52] in his yard,
[19:54] which I’ve got to go and get back, 我必须过去把它们带回来
[19:57] but one of them is missing. 但有一头牛不见了
[19:59] And we’ve got to find her. 我们必须找到它
[20:06] That’s the veal in a neighbouring farmer’s field. 那头就是跑到隔壁农场里的小牛
[20:09] Bad veal! 淘气的小牛!
[20:12] This is our neighbouring farmer, whose fields we are ripping to shreds. 他是辛苦劳作的农民 而我们正把他的田地弄得支离破碎
[20:16] [Lisa] Shall I do the apologies? He doesn’t look very happy… 我要去道歉吗?他看起来不太高兴
[20:21] [Lisa] I’m so sorry. 我很抱歉
[20:23] [Jeremy] I’m sorry about this. 这件事 真的很对不起
[20:26] [Kaleb] Sorry. I do apologise. 对不起 我很抱歉
[20:29] [mooing]
[20:40] [mooing]
[20:41] [Jeremy] I was hoping this would be a one-off incident. 我希望以后不会再发生这样的事
[20:45] [lively music]
[20:47] But it turned out the calves were even more escape-y 但事实证明小牛比公鸡更擅长逃脱
[20:50] than the cockerels.
[20:53] Hello, the cows are out. 奶牛出来了
[21:02] Fucking hell! 真该死
[21:05] I’m really, really sorry. 我真的很抱歉
[21:14] [he whistles]
[21:16] [Kaleb] Two, four, six, eight, nine. 三、四、六、八、九
[21:20] [lively music]
[21:22] Good. 很好!
[21:33] [Kaleb] I’m really sorry. 我真的很抱歉
[21:41] All right, Gerald? 杰拉德!它们又出来了
[21:44] They got out again.
[21:46] Now they’re away from their mums, you’ll have a job to keep them in!
[21:49] [Gerald speaking indistinctly]
[21:52] I was surprised to see they wasn’t back up there with them.
[21:55] They decide to just crack and go through it.
[21:58] You’ve got three strands of bush nearly all round
[22:01] to keep cattle in, haven’t you?
[22:04] But you know.
[22:10] [Jeremy] Hold on. 等一下
[22:11] This is their hoof marks. 这是它们的蹄印
[22:15] They’ve come through here. 它们已经到这边来了
[22:18] Two o’clock this morning, 今天凌晨2点
[22:20] I get the alarm on the phone, 鸡舍的电话闹钟叫醒了我 每天晚上2点
[22:21] hen houses have gone wrong, happens every night at two.
[22:24] And then six o’clock, 然后6点操作相机的人 打来了电话 奶牛又跑出来了
[22:26] the man operating that camera’s on the phone.
[22:28] “Your cows are out, again.”
[22:32] God, where are you? Fern! 天啊 你们去哪了?
[22:35] Cow pat. Faeces. Cow faeces. 牛屎 粪便 牛粪
[22:39] There they are. 它们在那里
[22:41] [soft music]
[22:44] [Jeremy] Come on, cows. 来吧 奶牛们
[22:47] [Jeremy] There was no doubt that the early morning cow round-up 毫无疑问 大早上把奶牛圈起来
[22:50] was a lovely way to start the day. 是开始新的一天的好方式
[22:54] [soft music continues] 来吧
[22:59] [Jeremy] Good cows. 乖乖牛
[23:01] [Jeremy] But this was the fourth escape in ten days. 但这是10天内的第四次逃跑
[23:05] So I had to do a proper job of mending the fence in their field. 我必须把牧场的栅栏修好
[23:11] [Kaleb] Did you repair that? 那个是你修的吗?
[23:15] It wasn’t me! 不是我 你能不能看看… 是你修的 不是吗?
[23:17] That was you, wasn’t it?
[23:20] That’s fucking appalling! Look at it! 这真是太可怕了 看看这个!
[23:23] I’ll grant you it’s not aesthetically pleasing. 我承认 这在美学上并不令人愉悦
[23:26] [Jeremy] Kaleb then instructed me 卡莱布告诉我农民 通常会如何处理这个问题
[23:28] on how farmers would typically deal with this problem.
[23:32] – That’s it and then you hold it… – You want me to do this? – 就是这样 扶住那边 – 你要我这样做吗?
[23:35] [Kaleb] Yeah. And then get a post and hold the post as well there, 然后找一根杆 在这扶住杆 我会把那根杆推到这个后面
[23:38] and then I’ll push that post in behind this one.
[23:40] – That make sense? – No. – 听懂了吗? – 没有
[23:42] It’s easy. 这很简单
[23:43] There you go. 开始吧
[23:45] – Right, and that’s gonna go behind… – This post here. – 这根放在后面 – 这根放这里
[23:48] – That one. – Yeah. [Jeremy] So I hold the fence up with two arms 我用两只手臂扶着栅栏
[23:50] and then with my other arm I pick up that new post 然后 我用另一只手拿起新的杆
[23:54] and then measure it with my other arm. 用我的另一只胳膊量一下
[23:56] Yeah, it’s not hard. 是的 这并不难
[23:58] [engine]
[24:00] [grunts]
[24:01] There it is. 好了
[24:04] No. You don’t… 不 你不…
[24:07] fucking hell, mate. 该死的 兄弟
[24:16] This is totally safe, isn’t it? Yeah. 这很安全 不是吗?
[24:19] I’m sure this is in every manual 我肯定每一本关于 农场安全的手册上都有这个
[24:21] on how to stay safe on the farm.
[24:25] Shit, don’t lower it now, you’ll break my arm off. 现在不要放低 你会把我的手弄断的
[24:27] [Kaleb] I’ll hold it with this. 我用这个扶着
[24:29] No, Kaleb, I don’t like… That’s ridiculous. 不 卡莱布 我不喜欢…这太荒谬了
[24:32] [Kaleb] It’s fine. Now get the post. 没关系 现在把杆拿来
[24:38] [Kaleb] You ready to hold this fence? 你准备好扶栅栏了吗?
[24:40] – What? – [Kaleb] Hold the fence. You ready? – 什么? – 扶着栅栏 你准备好了吗?
[24:43] [Jeremy screams]
[24:49] Ah, fucking hell! 该死的!天啊!
[24:51] Shit!
[24:57] Fuck! – 该死的! – 你没事吧?
[24:59] – [Kaleb] You all right? – No. 我有事
[25:03] Oh, hang on. 等一下
[25:04] [shouts in pain] Oh fuck no! I’m not sure this is good. 该死的!不知道这行不行
[25:09] [groans]
[25:10] [pants]
[25:14] [Jeremy pants]
[25:17] [Kaleb] Do you want me to ring Lisa for a bag of peas? – 你想打电话问丽莎要镇痛冰袋吗? – 不想
[25:19] [Jeremy] No.
[25:23] [Jeremy] This incident reminded me that it was time to do something 这次事故提醒我去做一件
[25:26] that I’d been putting off forever. 一直被我拖延的事
[25:29] [woman] Hello, and welcome to Agriculture Health and Safety. 您好 欢迎观看农业健康与安全
[25:33] This Lantra course, developed with HSE assistance, 本课程将帮助您识别和管理安全风险
[25:35] will help you identify and manage safety risks.
[25:38] If you control or manage the farm, 如果您是农场管理员 您需要为您自身和您的员工
[25:40] you are legally responsible for your safety
[25:41] and that of your employees, contractors, visitors 承包商和访客
[25:43] 以及所有被您工作影响的人的 安全问题承担责任
[25:45] and anyone affected by…
[25:47] …so that lower supporting bails are stabilised 把上层的捆包叠在一起
[25:49] by overlapping and interlocking upper bails… 扣紧 稳定支撑包…
[25:52] If you’re a self-employed farmer, safety law applies to you. 安全法始终使适用
[25:56] Compliance with the law protects you, 合规的做法能保护您 让您…
[25:59] – makes you much less likely to be hurt… – [yawning] God. 天啊
[26:01] [woman] …your boundaries and mark them on a map. 将工作场所的所有架空电力线
[26:05] 标记在地图上 进行风险评估
[26:06] Do a risk assessment.
[26:08] You and the contractor should be aware of these findings. 您和承包商应了解调查结果
[26:11] Provide information, instruction and training to your employees 为员工提供信息、指导和培训
[26:15] if they are involved in any work with the contractor. 如涉及承包商的工作 还应提供任何有关信息…
[26:17] You should also provide any information to…
[26:20] [Jeremy] Mercifully, Kaleb eventually rescued me 幸好有卡莱布把我
[26:23] from the torture of Health and Safety instructions 从健康和安全指示的折磨中拯救出来
[26:26] by calling to say our giant new water tank had arrived. 他打电话告诉我 我们巨大的新水箱已经到了
[26:32] [Jeremy] 20,000 litres of water. – 能装两万升水 – 是的
[26:36] [Kaleb] Yeah. Free oxygenated soft rainwater 含游离氧的软雨水从屋顶流到这
[26:39] will come off that roof and into here.
[26:43] [back-up beeper]
[26:47] [laughs]
[26:49] Clown. 没错 小丑一个
[26:51] [Jeremy] Right.
[26:53] Just lower that down and let’s see what the levels do. 放下来 我们看看水平高度
[27:00] [Kaleb] Too much. You reckon that’s too much of a lean? – 太多了 – 倾斜太多了?
[27:03] – I don’t think it’s gonna work. – What isn’t? 我觉得这不行
[27:05] – 什么不行? – 我们必须在下面放一个混凝土垫
[27:06] We’re gonna have to put a concrete pad down.
[27:09] [Jeremy] Dream on. 做梦吧
[27:11] Every bit of concrete in the country is currently being used by HS2. 这个国家里的混凝土 现在都归HS2项目
[27:15] They’re building a railway 他们在建一条从伦敦经停利物浦
[27:17] that goes from London to Liverpool or Manchester or something,
[27:18] 到曼彻斯特的铁路 会快12分钟
[27:20] about 12 minutes faster.
[27:22] It’s costing billions of pounds 耗资数十亿英镑 并且用上了英国所有的混凝土
[27:24] and it’s using every bit of concrete in Britain.
[27:28] I mean, who needs a railway? 谁需要铁路?
[27:30] I’ve never been on a train, so I don’t need a railway. 我从来没有坐过火车 所以我不需要
[27:34] – What? – I’ve never been on a train. – 什么? – 我从来没有坐过火车 从没有
[27:36] Never.
[27:38] – That’s not possible. – Prove it. How… 这不可能
[27:40] 证明给我看 不然…我可以… 你过过我的生活吗?
[27:42] Have you lived me?
[27:44] Have you been me? No. 你有我的人生经历吗?没有
[27:48] [Jeremy] I couldn’t argue with that, but I wasn’t wrong about the concrete. 我无法反驳 但混凝土这个事我没有说错
[27:53] So the next day we decided to relocate the water tank 于是第二天 我们决定给水箱换个位置
[27:57] to the other side of the barn. 搬到谷仓的另一边
[28:00] [Jeremy] You’ve got that 你成功了 不过顶上还要放东西 对吗?
[28:02] but then there’s a thing that goes on top of it, yeah?
[28:04] I think I’ve worked it out. 我已经有了解决方案
[28:07] [Jeremy] Job one was to fit all the components 首先是要安装水箱顶部的组件
[28:10] which go on the top of the tank.
[28:12] So Kaleb suggested I fire up the farm’s scissor lift. 卡莱布建议我用农场里的剪架升降台
[28:16] [back-up beeper]
[28:19] I once went up in one of these– Oh fucking hell! 我以前有次站在这个上面…真该死!
[28:23] [woman] Welcome to module two. Falls from height. 欢迎来到模块二 高空坠物
[28:26] [snoring]
[28:29] No ! – [Jeremy shouts] – [Kaleb laughs] 不!
[28:31] – [alarm] – It’s not gonna let you down now. 它现在不想让你下来
[28:34] – It’s made– Stop doing that! – [alarm] 它正在…快住手!
[28:38] [Kaleb laughs] [Kaleb] Now go up! 你现在位置很高
[28:40] No, down! Why won’t it go down anymore? 不 下来 它为什么不降下来?
[28:43] – [Kaleb] I got you, go back up. – Oh fuck off! – 有我呢 再上去 – 滚!
[28:46] [Kaleb laughs]
[28:49] Go and get a ladder. 去拿梯子
[28:51] – This is fine, look. – It’s not fine! – 这很好 你看 – 这不好!
[28:53] – [clanking] – [Jeremy] Ow!
[28:56] I hate this thing. 我讨厌这个东西
[28:58] – [Jeremy] Are you sure you’ve got it? – Yeah, yeah. – 你肯定你会操作了? – 是的
[29:01] [Kaleb] You get that end and I’ll get this end. 你到那头去 我来搞定这边
[29:04] [Jeremy] Moaning about the weather. 抱怨天气
[29:07] Stop it, stop being a twat. Back up. 别抱怨了 别做讨厌鬼
[29:09] 退一点 往前
[29:11] Forwards. [Kaleb] What do you mean, forwards? – 你什么意思? – 是这样吗?
[29:13] Is that it? It’s not on yet. One minute, I’ve got it. 装上去了 不 还没有 我要把这个安上去
[29:16] There you go, that’s on. I’m on. 好了 装好了 我装好了
[29:18] – Come on, push. – I am pushing. – 推 – 等一下 我在推
[29:20] No, push like a man, not like some little baby goat. 像男人一样用力推 而不是跟软绵绵的小山羊一样
[29:24] Get this off first of all. 首先 把这个拿掉
[29:28] Have you…
[29:30] Oh fucking hell! 真该死
[29:34] – [Kaleb groaning] – You in? – 你接上了吗? – 嗯
[29:36] [Kaleb] Yeah. – Don’t knock me off. – [Kaleb laughs] 别把我弄倒了
[29:39] – [Jeremy] There. – There, we’re on. – 好了 – 好了 我们装好了
[29:41] [Jeremy groans] Fucking hell. 真该死
[29:43] 61 years old, having to do something… ‘Cause how old are you? 23. 61岁了还不得不做… 你多大?23岁
[29:48] – It’s your show. – [Jeremy laughs] 这是你的节目
[29:49] [Jeremy] Oh, is it? Everyone get that? 是吗?大家都知道?
[29:53] – Everyone hear that? – [Kaleb laughs] 大家都听说了吗?
[30:01] 凌晨4点6分
[30:02] [cockerels crowing]
[30:08] [upbeat music]
[30:10] [Jeremy] It was now time to ensure 现在要确保能向餐厅持续供应牛肉
[30:12] a steady supply of beef for the restaurant,
[30:15] which meant getting the cows that weren’t pregnant… pregnant. 就要让没有怀孕的母牛怀孕
[30:20] And since this would mean inserting things in them, 要给它们插入一些东西
[30:23] Kaleb said I’d need to invest in a contraption called a “crush”. 卡莱布说我要投资 一个叫做分栏器的巧妙装置
[30:29] – So the cow goes in… – This side. – 牛进去… – 这边
[30:32] – Goes in there. – Yeah, walks through. – 到这里面去 – 是的 走进去…
[30:34] And then its head come… Where does its head go? 然后头从这边探出来… 它的头要往哪里?
[30:37] – Oh, it’s in there. – There, look. That comes out, actually. 就像这样 探出来
[30:40] – [Kaleb] That bar there, yeah? – Yeah? – 从那个栏杆那里? – 是的
[30:42] [Kaleb] That goes in here to jam their arse up. 进去 然后塞到它们的屁股里
[30:44] [Jeremy] Holy shit… 天啊
[30:47] Max Mosley would have paid a fortune to have a go in this. 马克斯莫斯利愿意花一大笔钱 尝试干这个
[30:50] And then that comes in like that and jams their head in. – 牛进来 然后把头塞进去 – 什么?
[30:53] What? How much does this weigh? Is it very heavy? – 多少…它重吗? – 天啊 我们需要装载机
[30:55] You need the loader.
[30:57] Here’s the thing, if I’m gonna set this up, 事情是这样的 如果要把这个设置好 我要半个小时
[30:59] it’s gonna take me half an hour.
[31:01] And then if you’re gonna help, it’s gonna take us an hour. – 嗯 – 如果你帮忙的话 需要一个小时
[31:05] – It won’t take you an hour. – [Kaleb] It will. 用不了你一个小时 我今天早上要用装载机
[31:07] I’m going to use the loader this morning.
[31:10] [Kaleb] Gently. 轻轻地!
[31:14] [Jeremy] Once I’d got the crush into position, – 我把分栏器安置好后 – 这边
[31:18] we had to build the pen that attaches to it. 我们还得给它建一个附属的畜栏
[31:22] Ready ? 准备好了吗?
[31:25] Fuck! 该死的
[31:27] Ow, fucking hell. 真该死
[31:28] [Kaleb] Such a wimp. – 真是个胆小鬼 – 什么?我要继续我的工作!
[31:30] What do you mean? I’m carrying on with my work.
[31:33] [upbeat music]
[31:41] – Is this big enough? – Yeah. – 够大吗? – 嗯 让它们一起嘎吱嘎吱
[31:42] We don’t want them too spaced out. You want them all crunched together.
[31:48] This is quite cool. You’ve actually got a good one here. – 你这个真的很不错 – 很好
[31:51] – Good. – [Kaleb] How much did it cost? – 花了多少钱? – 一万英镑
[31:52] [Jeremy] £10,000 this was.
[31:54] Fucking hell! – 老天啊! – 我知道
[31:55] I know, I know.
[31:58] [Jeremy] With the pen assembled, we went off to round up the cows. 准备好畜栏后 我们就去围捕奶牛了
[32:05] Dunno how I feel about you walking with a stick. 没想到你会用手杖
[32:08] [Jeremy] I like it. 我喜欢这玩意
[32:09] It makes me look like a… I’m starting to feel farmish. 它让我看起来… 让我觉得自己很有农家风格
[32:12] You know, I’m starting to understand little things about the countryside now. 我开始了解关于农村的一些小事
[32:16] That’s the problem. You only understand little things. 你只懂小事
[32:20] [Jeremy] Aha, I’ve found them. 我找到它们了
[32:22] I love this. 我喜欢这样
[32:24] They don’t look surprised or frightened, 当你靠近它们时 它们看起来 一点也不惊讶、害怕或恐惧
[32:27] or intimidated in any way when you approach.
[32:30] They just stare. Look at Pepper over on the left there. 它们只是盯着你看 看左边的胡椒
[32:34] They’re like six-year-old kids when you walk into a classroom. 它们就像六岁大的孩子 看到有人走进教室时那么盯着看
[32:38] You know a six-year-old kid, and a grown-up walks in… 六岁大的孩子看到大人走进来时那样
[32:42] They’re not frightened. Exactly that. 不会感到恐惧 正是这样
[32:45] – That’s Kaleb’s cow impression. – Ready? 这就是卡莱布对牛的印象
[32:48] Here we go. – 准备好了 – 我们开始吧
[32:50] [Kaleb] So let’s just gently walk them round. 我们轻轻地绕着它们走
[32:53] Come on then, steady. – 来吧 保持住 – 走 乖乖牛们
[32:55] [Jeremy] Go on, Mooties.
[32:56] [Kaleb calls the cows] Steady.
[32:57] – 保持住 – 继续前进
[32:59] [Jeremy] Go on.
[33:00] – Ah, Dilwyn! – [Dilwyn] Yeah. – 迪尔翁! – 嗯
[33:02] [Jeremy] They actually want to go in the crush. 它们实际上想进去 看
[33:05] [Kaleb] Oh my God! 我的天啊
[33:07] [Jeremy] That is easy. 这很容易 我们以前养羊时 没做到这样 不是吗?
[33:09] We never managed this with the sheep, did we?
[33:12] [Jeremy] Even though we’d rounded up all the cows, 尽管我们把所有的奶牛都围起来了 但迪尔翁只对两只年轻的小母牛
[33:14] it was just the two young heifers
[33:17] that Dilwyn would be artificially inseminating. 进行人工授精
[33:20] And today was just part one of the procedure. 今天只是完成部分的程序
[33:24] So it’s just Deeny and Pepper that you need? – 你要给迪尼和胡椒做? – 是的 我要让它们发情
[33:26] Yeah, I’m bringing them on heat, basically.
[33:28] I’m gonna put a progesterone-releasing intra-vaginal device 我要在它们的阴道内
[33:31] 放入黄体酮释放装置
[33:33] into the vagina,
[33:35] and then, when we take it out, 然后再取出来 让它们发情
[33:37] that’ll bring them on heat and then you can serve them with AI after that.
[33:38] 然后你可以通过人工授精为它们服务
[33:41] [lively music]
[33:43] [Jeremy] Dilwyn said the easiest way of tackling the job 迪尔翁说完成这项任务最简单的方法
[33:46] was to run all the cows through the Max Mosley machine 就是让所有奶牛通过马克斯莫斯利机
[33:50] until we got to the heifers. 直到小母牛过来
[33:53] [Jeremy] Go on, in you go. – 去吧 你给我进去 去吧 – 去吧
[33:55] [Kaleb] Go on. Give it one.
[33:57] Come on. – 来吧 – 我像在跟甘道夫一起工作
[33:58] It’s like working with Gandalf.
[34:00] [Kaleb laughs]
[34:01] [Jeremy] Come on. 来吧
[34:03] [Kaleb] Go on then. Go on! 前进 继续前进
[34:05] [Jeremy] Come on, in you go. 去吧 你快给我进去
[34:07] No. Now they’ve all escaped. 不好了 它们都逃走了 打到头了
[34:09] Oh, on the head.
[34:11] Bring them all round again. 我会再把它们全都赶回来 过来!
[34:13] [Kaleb] Go on!
[34:14] Stop him.
[34:17] [Jeremy] Come on. No. 拜托 不 不是这样的
[34:18] Not that way. Wrong, wrong…
[34:20] 全都错了
[34:21] 15分钟后
[34:26] [Jeremy] Go on. Go on! 进去!
[34:28] – [Kaleb] Go on. – [Jeremy] Go on cows! – 进去! – 进去吧 奶牛们!
[34:37] Go on! That way. 进去!往那边去
[34:39] Go on! Go on! 进去!
[34:41] [mooing]
[34:45] Bribery. We’ve tried the stick. Now we’re using the carrot. 贿赂它们 我们已经试过棍子了 现在让我们用胡萝卜
[34:51] [Jeremy] Backing up. It’s backing up. 它退后了
[34:53] Yeah, it’s now fully reversed back where it came from. 现在全退回到来的地方了
[34:57] They don’t like the crush. 到分栏器外面了
[35:00] What about money? – 钱呢? – 什么?
[35:02] – What? – Oh, I don’t know. I mean… I’m so cold and wet 我不知道 我现在又冷又湿又难过
[35:06] and unhappy.
[35:08] I can’t… 我不能…
[35:12] [Jeremy] My cows are as disobedient as my sheep, 我的牛和我的羊一样不听话
[35:14] it’s pouring with rain, 天上下着倾盆大雨 我的鞋子沾满了粪便
[35:16] my shoes are covered in excrement.
[35:17] I don’t know why I find this funny. [laughs] 我不知道为什么我觉得这很有趣
[35:20] It’s because you’ve never experienced boating in the Mediterranean 因为你从未在地中海划过船
[35:25] or eating an agreeable pasta… 或者吃过好吃的…
[35:27] Let’s just make this a bit smaller. Grab that one there. 我们把圈变小 抓住那头
[35:30] Jeremy, grab that. 杰里米 抓住那头
[35:33] – [Jeremy] Go on! – [Kaleb] Go on! 进去
[35:35] Go on! 进去!
[35:37] [Jeremy] Mercifully we finally got Deeny into the crush. 好在我们终于让迪尼进入了分栏器
[35:43] So I’ve gotta put my hand in her, just to check that she’s all there. 我必须把手伸进去 看看它是不是
[35:48] [Jeremy] I wouldn’t do it now. She’s cleaning the… What do you mean? 现在不行
[35:50] 她正在清洁…你什么意思?
[35:52] [Dilwyn] That she’s got a womb and ovaries. 她有子宫和卵巢
[35:56] [Kaleb] That sounds like a balloon, and I’m terrified of balloons. 听起来像气球一样 气球让我恐惧
[36:00] [Jeremy] Terrified? – 恐惧 这么重的词 – 巨大的恐惧 你不懂
[36:01] Massive fear. You have no idea.
[36:04] Wouldn’t go in a room if there was a balloon there. – 不敢去有气球的房间 – 真的吗?
[36:06] – [Jeremy] Really ? – Yeah.
[36:08] Shit scared. Like… 真是吓死人了
[36:11] Don’t tell anyone that. 不要告诉别人
[36:14] [Dilwyn] I’ll see if she’s all there. 我们看看它是不是可以
[36:17] [Jeremy] This is like a prostate but on an industrial level. 就像给男性做前列腺检查 但是工业水准的
[36:22] [Dilwyn] All about…
[36:24] [Jeremy] Holy mother… 天…
[36:30] There’s a womb. 有子宫 它很好 它没问题
[36:31] Which is good.
[36:33] She’s fine.
[36:34] She’s got all the bits? – 它啥都有了? – 是的 它有
[36:36] [Dilwyn] Yeah, she has.
[36:37] [Jeremy] What the hell’s that? 那到底是什么?
[36:39] [Dilwyn] That’s the shit. – 是屎 – 我以为你是把手伸进它的阴道?
[36:41] [Jeremy] I thought you went in its vagina.
[36:43] [Dilwyn] I did it rectally. So basically I go in rectally. – 我是通过直肠 所以 基本上… – 什么?
[36:46] And I can feel the uterus from the outside. 我从外面感觉到了子宫
[36:49] – So you’ve got to go up the back door? – [Dilwyn] Yes. – 所以你必须从后门走吗? – 是的
[36:52] [Dilwyn] So now I’m gonna put the pred in. 现在我要把“种子”放进去 这是浸渍剂 孕激素
[36:56] That’s impregnating the progesterone.
[36:58] It’s one of the sex hormones. – 是一种性激素 – 会引起排卵吗?
[37:00] So this will cause the ovulation to start?
[37:02] Well, taking it out will. 拿出来的时候会 从而开始下一个周期
[37:03] That will start the next cycle.
[37:05] And how long is it gonna be in for? – 那个要放在它体内多久? – 一个星期
[37:07] – A week. – OK.
[37:09] [Jeremy] Here we go, the triangle of procreation is on its way. 我们开始吧 生产三角器要进去了
[37:13] [Dilwyn] Yeah. I would have thought so. 嗯 差不多是这样
[37:17] [Dilwyn] Wow wow…
[37:20] There you go. Go on. 好了 你走吧
[37:21] [Jeremy] Go on! Go on, yes! 走吧 不 走 对
[37:26] [Jeremy] Finally it was Pepper’s turn. 终于 轮到胡椒了
[37:30] Calm down, Pepper, there’s a good cow. I like this one. 冷静 胡椒 你是一头好牛 我喜欢这头
[37:33] [Dilwyn] There. Yeah, she’s fine. 好了 它很好
[37:36] Right, release the cows. 好的 把牛放了
[37:42] So we’ve herded them all the way round here, 我们把它们都赶到这 圈进去 喊了一个小时
[37:44] put them in here, shouted at them for an hour
[37:46] and then released them and they’ve got to think, “Why?” 然后放了它们 它们肯定会想:“为什么?”
[37:51] [Jeremy] Look, she’s holding her tail up. 看 它把尾巴翘起来了 胡椒!
[37:54] Oh, Pepper!
[37:57] [Jeremy] As we now had to wait a week 我们现在要等一个星期 才能进行人工授精…
[37:59] until the artificial insemination could happen…
[38:03] [upbeat music]
[38:04] [Kaleb] Ready ? 准备好了?
[38:06] [Jeremy] …Kaleb and his brother Kieron 卡莱布和他的兄弟基兰 准备要开始修理栅栏了
[38:07] set about repairing the cow fence properly…
[38:14] whilst I decided to catch up on some maintenance jobs. 而我决定把之前 没做的维护工作给做了
[38:19] Right, now then. 没错 现在 上升 准备起飞吧
[38:20] Up, up and away.
[38:22] [Jeremy] Starting with the unruly hedge opposite Gerald’s house. 从杰拉德房子对面 乱七八糟的树篱开始
[38:27] Hedge clipping. 修剪树篱!
[38:33] Yes. 是的
[38:35] Lovely, lovely. 真棒
[38:39] All right Gerald. 嗨 杰拉德
[38:40] The G-dog is going to be dead chuffed 杰狗要高兴死了
[38:44] that I’ve been out and sorted his hedge out for him. 我来帮他整理好这些树篱
[38:50] [Gerald] Jesus fucking Christ.
[38:55] Oh Jeremy!
[39:02] Christ now turn that machine off or else it’s gonna take that hedge out,
[39:05] for God’s sake.
[39:07] That wasn’t the hedge that… [indistinct]
[39:10] [Gerald speaks indistinctly]
[39:12] [Kaleb] Fucking hell! 搞什么鬼!
[39:14] What the fuck is he doing? 他到底在做什么?
[39:17] Look at that. He’s missed all the brambles! 看 他没弄走荆棘 我告诉他从下面开始 然后往上
[39:19] I told him to start from the bottom and then work up.
[39:22] [Gerald] That’s like putting a tee-shirt on your back
[39:24] to make some bloody holes… [indistinct]
[39:27] If you was a pigeon… [indistinct]
[39:35] Here you are, mate, tell him off. 你去谴责他吧
[39:40] I said… [Gerald speaks indistinctly]
[39:46] [Gerald continues speaking indistinctly]
[39:57] You’re not happy, then? 这说明你并不开心?
[40:01] Right, well that’s me sacked then. 是的 那我被解雇了
[40:11] I honestly didn’t think I was doing that bad a job. 老实说 我没想到我做得那么糟糕
[40:14] [lively music]
[40:17] [Jeremy] Seven days after Dilwyn’s visit, 在迪尔翁到访的七天后 很明显小母牛
[40:19] it was pretty clear that the heifers were now on heat.
[40:21] 正在发情
[40:24] [lively music continues]
[40:26] [mooing]
[40:32] [Jeremy] Don’t do that, it’s disgusting! 不 别这样 这很恶心
[40:38] I know some of you 我知道你们中的有些人在担心
[40:41] will have been concerned the other day,
[40:43] when Dilwyn the vet put his entire arm inside… 那天迪尔翁兽医把他的整个手臂
[40:48] inside the heifers, but really, 塞到小母牛里面 不过不用担心 因为第二天早上
[40:50] there’s no need to worry because the next morning
[40:54] I got a photograph, not a very good one, but a photograph nevertheless, 我拍了一张照片 拍得不太好 但毕竟是一张
[40:58] of Deeny the heifer who was… 迪尼的照片 就是那头被他碰了的
[41:01] touched. 小母牛 然后…
[41:03] And…
[41:06] There’s a photograph. 在这张照片中 你看 它独自一人走进了分栏器
[41:07] She just walked into the crush all by herself.
[41:10] [laughs]
[41:12] “Where’s that Welshman with the glove? Where is he? “那个戴手套的威尔士人在哪里? 他在哪里?”
[41:16] If you stand here it’s quite nice.” “你站在这 挺好的”
[41:18] Anyway, we’ve gotta make them pregnant now. 无论如何 我们现在必须让它们怀孕
[41:22] Come on cows, time to be made pregnant. Well, two of you. 来吧 奶牛们 是时候怀孕了 好吧 你们两个
[41:25] Go on. Go on. 走
[41:28] Go on. [Jeremy] That meant once more herding them towards the crush. 就是说要再一次把它们引到分栏器那
[41:32] Go on. No, no, no, no. 走 不
[41:35] Stop it! 别搞了!走
[41:37] Go on.
[41:41] [Lisa] Come on, girlies. 来吧 姑娘们!
[41:45] [Jeremy] Have you seen the amount of sex that’s going on? 你们看到这儿高涨的情欲了吗? 就好像是农场的性派对
[41:47] It’s like being at a sixth form party, this is.
[41:51] Oh shit, did you see that? 真该死 你看到了吗? 欲望让它们疯狂
[41:54] They’re being driven mad by lust.
[41:56] [Jeremy] As we finished getting them into the pen, 当我们把它们赶入畜栏后
[41:59] Charlie, Dilwyn and Tim the cowman arrived with the gentleman juice. 查理、迪尔翁和放牧人蒂姆 带着绅士液体来了
[42:05] – Is that seriously all sperm? – No. 这里面真的全都是精子吗?
[42:07] [Charlie] There’s liquid nitrogen in there as well. – 不 里面还有液氮 – 是为了保持低温?
[42:10] – [Jeremy] Oh, so keeping it cool. – [Tim] To keep it cool.
[42:12] [Jeremy] After once more demonstrating my new herding skills… 在再次展示了我新掌握的 放牧技能后…
[42:16] No, stop. 站住
[42:19] Stop. 站住!
[42:21] [Jeremy] We got Pepper into the crush for her semen injection. 我们把胡椒赶入了分栏器 好给它注射精液
[42:25] [Dilwyn] That’s a straw. – 那是一根管子 – 那是一根管子?
[42:26] [Jeremy] That’s a straw. I don’t know what a straw is.
[42:28] 居然不知道什么才是管子
[42:30] – [Lisa] Syringe. – [Jeremy] One syringe. – 注射器 – 一个注射器
[42:31] It doesn’t look like there’s that much sperm. Is it just that tiny bit? 看起来好像没有那么多的精液
[42:35] [Jeremy] Is it 10cc? 是10立方厘米吗?
[42:36] [Dilwyn] Less than that. – 大约1毫升 – 不 这是男性的
[42:38] No, it’s the average amount a man ejaculates.
[42:39] 平均射精量
[42:41] That’s why the band was called 10cc. Did nobody know that? 所以那个乐队叫10cc
[42:43] [Charlie] No. – 没有人知道吗? – 没有
[42:45] [Tim] Then your straw goes in the gun. – 然后把管子放入枪口内 – 枪?
[42:47] [Charlie] In the gun?
[42:49] – [Tim] In the AI gun. – [Charlie] AI gun. – 人工授精枪 – 这真是激动人心
[42:50] This is actually quite an exciting moment.
[42:52] And you put it down your back to keep it warm. – 把它放到背后面保持温度 – 什么?
[42:55] What?
[42:57] [Jeremy] I see, while you put on the Heriots. – 在你给它受精的同时 – 你给它做人工授精
[42:59] [Tim] You put on the Heriots.
[43:01] Then… 然后…
[43:04] [Lisa] What are you feeling for? 你在摸什么?
[43:06] [Tim] Right, I’ve got the cervix in my hand now. 我的手抓到了子宫颈
[43:09] Now she’s straining on my hand. 它正往我的手顶
[43:12] – So it’s gotta to through the cervix? – [Lisa] Yeah, right in. – 必须通过子宫颈? – 是的
[43:14] [Tim] And then, as it come through her cervix there 通过子宫颈时 慢慢地
[43:18] and just slowly let it go. [Lisa] Release. – 射出 – 把它放了吧
[43:20] [Tim] Go on, girl. 走吧 姑娘 走吧
[43:22] – [Charlie] Good. – [Jeremy] Come on Deeny, in you go. 走吧 迪尼 进去 你会喜欢的
[43:24] You like it in there.
[43:25] [Jeremy] So, my beef supply was now up and running… 所以 我的牛肉供应计划 现在已经启动 开始运作了
[43:29] [Dilwyn] Two heifers potentially pregnant. – 有两头母牛可能怀孕 – 谢谢
[43:31] [Charlie] Thank you very much.
[43:33] [cockerel crowing] [Jeremy] …the eggs were coming thick and fast… 鸡蛋越来越多 下得越来越快
[43:36] [Jeremy] It’s a good haul this morning. 今天早上的收成不错
[43:40] [Jeremy] …and the chili chutney was in production. 辣椒酸辣酱也正在生产中
[43:43] 死神辣椒
[43:44] So things were looking good 新的生态友好餐厅看起来前景不错
[43:46] for my new low-miles, eco-friendly restaurant.
[43:51] All I had to do now was win over the locals. 我现在只需要赢得当地人的支持
[43:56] Didley Squat sponsors Chadlington Football Club. 下一集
[43:58] 迪丽斯库阿特 赞助查德灵顿足球俱乐部
[44:00] It’s a small village and I just thought rather than have them all gossiping, 这是个小村庄
[44:02] 我想与其让流言飞起 不如来解释一下我们正在做的事
[44:04] I’d go down and explain what we’re doing.
[44:06] [man] You described us as morons. 你说我们是白痴
[44:08] You said “Every village has one moron, I have six.” 你说每个村子都有一个白痴 而我有六个
[44:11] [laughter]
[44:12] [theme music playing]
[44:44] 创意监督 杨婕
克拉克森的农场

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克拉克森的农场(Clarkson's Farm)剧集台词目录:

在线阅读
S01E01
S01E02
S01E03
S01E04
S01E05
S01E06
S01E07
S01E08
S02E01
S02E02
S02E03
S02E04
S02E05
S02E06
S02E07
S02E08
S03E01
S03E02
S03E03
S03E04
S03E05
S03E06
S03E07
S03E08

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