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克拉克森的农场(Clarkson’s Farm)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 克拉克森的农场(Clarkson’s Farm)第2季第2集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
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[00:06] [theme music playing]
[00:08] 克拉克森的农场
[00:11] 第十章 畏缩
[00:24] [pastoral music]
[00:38] [Jeremy] The day after the cows arrived, I went to check on them with Kaleb, 奶牛到达后的第二天 我和卡莱布一起去看奶牛
[00:42] who was actually quite excited. 他很兴奋
[00:45] [Jeremy] How old were you when you started as a cowman? 你几岁开始养奶牛?
[00:48] – [Kaleb] Thirteen. – Thirteen? – 十三岁 – 十三岁?
[00:49] [Kaleb] Thirteen. 十三
[00:51] – [Jeremy] You love them, don’t you? – Oh a hundred percent. – 你很喜欢它们 对吗? – 百分百地爱
[00:53] [Jeremy] Look at that. This is exactly what we need for the soil. 看这个 我们的土壤就需要这个
[00:57] Now that is full of nitrogen. 里面富含氮
[01:00] That goes into the soil, and that is good. – 对土壤很好 – 是的
[01:02] Yeah. And saves us having to put nitrogen on. 省了我们给化肥添加
[01:05] – Chemicals on. – Chemicals, yeah. – 氮 – 化肥 没错
[01:07] – Look who’s here. Stranger. – [Kaleb] Here she is, back. 看看谁来了 陌生人
[01:10] – 她回来了 – 从爱尔兰回来看望妈妈
[01:11] [Jeremy] Back from Ireland, over to see the mother.
[01:14] [Kaleb] Come and look at this turd. 快来看看这坨屎!欢迎回来
[01:15] – Welcome back. – [laughs]
[01:18] [Kaleb] Cow pat. 牛粪 等它们变硬以后 就可以把它们当做飞盘
[01:19] You know when they get really hard you can frisbee them.
[01:23] Is that a game you play in your rural… – 这是你们在农村玩的游戏… – 是的
[01:24] – Yeah. We actually did. – Oh!
[01:26] When they get hard, you can pick them up and frisbee 变硬后就可以捡起来 扔得最远的获胜
[01:28] and whoever chucks it the furthest wins.
[01:30] How was Ireland? – 爱尔兰怎么样? – 非常棒!
[01:32] – It was so good. – Good.
[01:33] – I hadn’t seen my mum for two years. – I know. – 我已经两年没见妈妈了 – 我知道!
[01:36] – I’m so sorry about your dog, Kaleb. – Oh yeah, yesterday. 我为你的狗感到难过 卡莱布
[01:38] I’m so sorry. – 是的 就在昨天 – 我很遗憾
[01:41] Cancer all down the side of his face. Put him down yesterday. 脸上长癌 昨天安乐死了
[01:43] I’ve never put down a dog 我从来没有安乐死过 一条还能四处乱跑玩耍的狗
[01:44] that is running around and trying to play.
[01:47] It was horrible. He was just… it was horrible. 太可怕了
[01:49] – [Lisa] I’m so sorry. – He’s in a better place now. – 我很难过 – 它现在在一个更好的地方
[01:51] And we’ll cheer him up ’cause he likes cows. 奶牛会让他振作起来的
[01:55] [Jeremy] Cows! – 奶牛! – 不 不要吓唬它们
[01:56] [Lisa] No, don’t scare them.
[01:58] [Jeremy] I’m not gonna scare them. I’m just saying “cows.” 我不是要吓唬它们 我只是说“奶牛”
[02:01] There they are. 它们在那边
[02:03] [mooing]
[02:04] – [Lisa] Oh. – [Jeremy] Ow.
[02:07] [Lisa] Oh, hello. 你好 它们的味道可真好闻
[02:08] They smell divine.
[02:10] [soft music]
[02:12] [Jeremy] Whilst Lisa and Kaleb were introducing themselves… 当丽莎和卡莱布自我介绍时…
[02:16] [Kaleb] Look at them, they’re so relaxed. 看看它们 它们很放松 嘿!
[02:18] Hey !
[02:19] [Jeremy] …Dilwyn the vet arrived. 兽医迪尔翁来了
[02:22] – [Jeremy] How’ve you been? – Yeah, not too bad. – 最近如何? – 还不错
[02:24] Just sort of having to fight all the autograph hunters away 必须躲着那些要签名的人 诸如此类的
[02:27] and all that type of stuff, but…
[02:29] [Kaleb calls the cows]
[02:31] [Dilwyn] Where are we here? 我们这是在哪?
[02:32] [Lisa] Jeremy? They’re trying to get over the fence. 杰里米?它们想越过栅栏
[02:35] [Jeremy] What? [mooing] 什么
[02:37] – [wood cracking] – [Kaleb] Oh fucking hell! – 真该死 – 它穿过去了
[02:39] [Lisa] Now through the fence.
[02:41] – [Kaleb] Cows are out! – [Lisa] Jeremy. – 奶牛出去了! – 不!真糟糕!
[02:42] [Jeremy] Oh shit! They’ll be on the road.
[02:43] – 它们会跑到马路上 – 我的天啊
[02:45] [Lisa] Oh my God.
[02:46] The road is up there and there’s no fence. 那边是马路 没有栅栏
[02:49] – [Kaleb] Go on! – [Jeremy] For heavens… Please stop. – 快跑! – 天啊 拜托 快停下
[02:52] [Kaleb] Go on!
[02:53] Lisa, come that side! 丽莎 到那边去
[02:57] [Jeremy] No, they’re going back, they’re just… 不!它们回去了… 该死的
[02:58] Oh for fucking hell!
[03:01] [Kaleb] There’s a gate in that corner. We’ll walk them down there. 那个角落有一个门 我们引它们去那儿 去打开门
[03:03] – Jeremy, go and open that gate. – Yeah.
[03:05] [Kaleb] If one goes through, they’ll all go through it. 如果有一个过去 剩下所有的都会跟过去
[03:08] We just slowly take them down there, really slowly. – 我们只要慢慢地引它们去 – 我懂了
[03:11] [Jeremy] Got you.
[03:13] Come on, cows. – 过来吧 奶牛们 – 稳稳地
[03:14] [Kaleb] Steady.
[03:16] Steady. – 稳稳地 – 好姑娘
[03:18] [Jeremy] Good girls.
[03:19] [Dilwyn] Yeah, they’re going through. – 它们过去了 – 好姑娘 过来
[03:21] [Kaleb] Good girls, come on.
[03:23] We’ve had them a day. 这些奶牛来我们这已经一整天了
[03:25] One day.
[03:29] [Jeremy] Having got the cows back in their field and mended the fence, 把奶牛们赶回牧场里 还修了栅栏
[03:35] I was worried that they’d be just as unruly as the sheep, 我担心它们像羊一样不守规矩
[03:38] but Dilwyn explained what was going on. 但迪尔翁解释了刚刚的事
[03:42] There’s a hierarchy. – 牛群里有等级制度 – 真的吗?
[03:45] – [Jeremy] Really ? – Yeah, there is. So there’ll be a chief cow in there? – 是的 – 有一头牛是首领
[03:48] Oh absolutely. The one that broke through the fence. – 嗯 – 可能就是刚刚冲出来的那头
[03:51] – Probably was. And they all know where they are in the… 或许是 它们都知道它们所处的… – Probably was.
[03:54] – Pecking order? Really ? – Yeah. – 阶级位置 真的吗? – 是的
[03:56] And they don’t tend to argue then, 它们不爱争吵 一切都很和气
[03:58] and everything goes really, really nicely.
[04:01] I never knew that. So with cows, whichever one leads, 所以对于奶牛来说 谁先抵达这 谁就是领袖
[04:05] like when they first get here, “I’m in charge.”
[04:07] – [Dilwyn] Yeah. – And they just go “OK.” – 它们都会“同意”? – 是的
[04:09] Yeah. And the others are quite happy to follow. 其他奶牛很乐意跟随 这是牛群的本能反应
[04:11] That’s what cattle are like, that’s the herd instinct.
[04:13] You know, even down to sort of zebus jumping off a cliff, 即便是试着跳下悬崖
[04:18] or trying to cross the Zambezi, or whatever. 穿过赞比西河的瘤牛群也是如此
[04:21] They’ll all stand there saying “You go first, you go first.” 一些说“你先走” 然后其中一头说 “我要走了” 剩下的都将跟随它
[04:23] And then somebody says: “Right, I’m going.”
[04:24] And the whole bloomin’ lot go.
[04:26] So that’s why, it’s hardwired into them. 这是它们的天性
[04:29] [Jeremy] They go under the trees because? 它们到这树底下是为什么?
[04:32] [Dilwyn] They feel safe under there. 它们在这感到安全 远离捕食者
[04:34] They’re away from the predators.
[04:36] [Lisa moos]
[04:41] [Jeremy] This is Pepper. The white one. 这是胡椒 白色的那头 是我的宠物
[04:43] This is my pet.
[04:45] The little five-year-old girl, Rosie, from the farm we bought them from, 我们买奶牛的那个农场 有个小女孩罗西 她最喜欢胡椒
[04:48] that was her favourite.
[04:49] So she said: “Will you ask Jeremy to really look after Pepper for me?” 她说:“请替我照顾好胡椒”
[04:53] – [Lisa] Ha. – I don’t know. So I said I would. 我说我会的
[04:57] [upbeat music]
[05:01] [Jeremy] I’d bought the cows to reinvigorate my soil. 我买奶牛来恢复我的土地
[05:04] But because such a small flock would not be profitable 但如果我把它们卖给屠夫 这一小群牛也没什么利润
[05:08] if I sold it to a butcher,
[05:09] I’d come up with the idea of selling the meat 于是我想在自己的餐厅里卖
[05:12] in my own restaurant.
[05:14] And on that front, I’d had another brainwave… 在这方面 我有了另一个主意
[05:19] chilis! 辣椒
[05:20] – 对 – 就在这边
[05:21] – Right over here. – [Lisa] Oh, oh…
[05:23] [Jeremy] My plan was to grow them so I could sell chili chutney 我计划种植辣椒
[05:25] 这样我就可以在餐厅和农场商店里 卖辣椒酸辣酱
[05:27] in both the restaurant and the farm shop.
[05:31] [Jeremy] Clever, eh? 很不错 不是吗?
[05:34] That’ll do. 可以的
[05:35] [Kaleb] I’d say it goes like that. – 看 就是这样 – 好
[05:38] There.
[05:40] [Jeremy] So Kaleb and I built two polytunnels. 我和卡莱布一起搭建了两个塑料大棚
[05:44] [upbeat music continues]
[05:49] And then I had to choose what sort of chilies to grow in them. 然后我要选择种什么样的辣椒
[05:56] This is a habanero, 这是哈瓦那辣椒 在斯科维尔辣度表上的值是
[05:58] which on the Scoville heat scale scores…
[06:01] between 150,000 and 325,000, 15万到32万5千之间 这意味着它非常辣
[06:04] which means it’s pretty damn hot.
[06:15] Hmm…
[06:16] That’s pretty nice, actually. 很不错
[06:19] Now that was 150,000, thereabouts, on the Scoville scale. 这个在斯科维尔辣度表上的值 大约是15万
[06:22] This one, this is a Naga.
[06:23] 这是娜迦辣椒 130万
[06:24] This is 1.3 million.
[06:33] Oh… OK. 好的
[06:35] Right.
[06:37] Hmm…
[06:40] Hmm…
[06:42] Oh! 天啊
[06:48] Holy shit! 我的天啊!
[06:50] That’s really hot. 这真的很辣
[06:56] Ah! Fucking hell! 辣死我了
[06:59] [burps] Oh, excuse me. 不好意思
[07:02] That’s just some sick coming up. 只是有点想吐
[07:05] Oh dear. 哦 亲爱的
[07:07] Oh my God, what are you doing? 天啊 你在忙活什么?
[07:11] What have you got? 你弄到了什么?
[07:12] [Jeremy] That might be a bit too hot. Do you want to try a bit? 这可能有点太辣了 想试试吗?
[07:16] [Lisa] Go on then. 来吧 它叫什么?
[07:17] What’s it called?
[07:18] – [Jeremy] Naga. – Naga. – 娜迦 – 娜迦?
[07:20] You’ve got to chew it ten times before you swallow it, 必须咀嚼10下 否则这会灼伤你的胃
[07:22] otherwise it burns your stomach.
[07:25] Yeah. Oh fuck, that’s hot already. 嗯 该死的 这就开始觉得辣了
[07:28] [laughs]
[07:31] Bit of a kick, hasn’t it? 有点辣 不是吗?
[07:32] [Jeremy laughs]
[07:35] Your arse in the morning is going to look like the Japanese flag. 明天早上你的屁股 会跟日本国旗一样
[07:41] [upbeat music]
[07:45] [Jeremy] In the end, we planted a selection. 最后 我们选了一种
[07:49] Mild, Hungarian habaneros, 温和的匈牙利哈瓦那辣椒
[07:53] eye-watering Nagas, 辣眼睛的娜迦
[07:56] and completely volcanic Carolina Reapers. 火辣的卡罗莱纳死神
[08:04] Then, with a bag of ripened Nagas in the boot, 接着 载着一袋成熟的娜迦
[08:07] I went off to create a Diddly Squat chili chutney. 我就出发去做迪丽斯库阿特酸辣酱了
[08:12] Sadly I’m not able to do the cooking in my own kitchen 我不能在自家的厨房里做饭 因为我的厨房警察
[08:15] because the kitchen police haven’t inspected it.
[08:18] 还没有检查过
[08:20] And that’s why I’ve come here. 这就是我来这里的原因
[08:26] 奇平诺顿橄榄球俱乐部
[08:28] This is where my boy used to play. 这是我儿子以前打球的地方
[08:31] Every Sunday I’d come and watch him for eight years. 八年了 我每周日都来看他打球
[08:34] [Jeremy] In the rugby club kitchen, which had passed the police exam, 橄榄球俱乐部的厨房 已经通过了卫生检查员的视察
[08:39] I met up with two chili cooking experts. 我在这里跟两位烹饪辣椒的专家见面
[08:41] – [Jeremy] Greetings. – Tomasz. – 你们好 – 塔玛斯
[08:43] – [Jeremy] Tomasz. Polish. – Yes. – 塔玛斯 波兰人? – 是的
[08:45] Joanna. – 乔安娜 – 你好吗?
[08:47] – How are you? – I’m doing fabulous. So we’re gonna make, I think, for you, 我现在很好 我们想要给你们
[08:50] a tomato-based chili sauce 制作一种番茄辣椒酱 里面加了大块的娜迦
[08:52] with chunky Naga in it
[08:54] and some chunky tomatoes, 还有大块的西红柿和洋葱
[08:57] chunky onions.
[08:58] – So not completely pureed. Yeah. – OK. – 大块的辣椒 – 所以是没有完全成糊状?
[09:00] – So there’s a crunch to it. – [Joanna] Yeah. – 有咀嚼感? – 是的
[09:03] We like the flavour of the malt vinegar with tomatoes. 我们喜欢麦芽醋和西红柿的味道 搭配在一起很美味
[09:07] It just goes so well together.
[09:09] – What we– – [coughs] – 我们… – 真该死
[09:10] [Jeremy] Fucking hell! [coughs]
[09:12] [Joanna] These chilies are really, really hot. 这辣椒真辣
[09:15] Shall we put the extractor fan on? 我们要不要打开排气扇?
[09:18] It is a bit noisy. 这声音有点大
[09:20] [Jeremy coughs] [Joanna coughs] 开一点
[09:25] [they laugh]
[09:28] I’m ten feet away from them. 我距离他们大概有三米远
[09:31] Oh my giddy aunt. – 真是吓我一跳 – 好吧
[09:33] [Joanna] OK.
[09:35] You’re managing to do very well there. – 你没问题 你没咳 – 我知道
[09:37] – You’re not coughing. – I know.
[09:38] Because you’re close, you don’t cough as much. 因为当你靠近时 就不会咳得那么厉害
[09:41] – Really? It’s just that I’m far away? – Try. – 真的吗?就因为我离得比较远? – 你试试
[09:44] [Joanna] What do you think of this… 你觉得这个怎么样?
[09:47] [coughs]
[09:51] What we’ve done is, we’ve taken the jars out of the oven 我们已经把罐子从烤箱里拿出来了 它们现在已经消好毒了
[09:54] and they’re nice and sterile now.
[09:56] How long does chili sauce keep for? – 辣椒酱能保存多久? – 所以…
[09:59] – So… – [coughs]
[10:00] The… [she coughs]
[10:02] roughly one year. 大约一年
[10:05] [they cough]
[10:08] [Joanna] OK, more chilies. 好的 再加些辣椒
[10:12] – [Joanna] More Naga. – [Tomasz] More cough. – 现在更多了 – 咳得也更厉害
[10:15] [Jeremy] How long have you been here, Tomasz? – 你来这多久了 塔玛斯? – 已经在这工作九年了
[10:18] Nine years. [coughs]
[10:19] Sorry, it’s because of the chili. 抱歉 我快…因为辣椒
[10:22] [laughs]
[10:24] [Jeremy] How many Poles do you get through in a year? 你一年能遇到多少波兰人?
[10:28] – [laughs] – [Tomasz coughs]
[10:30] – He’s very good. – And bad. – 他人很好 – 也很坏
[10:33] Sorry. 对不起
[10:35] [laughing and coughing]
[10:38] [Tomasz] Yeah, and… 嗯
[10:41] [laughing and coughing]
[10:43] [laughing]
[10:46] [soft music]
[10:50] [Jeremy] After that it was a relief to get back to the cow dung 之后回归牛粪 和我的短期高强度放牧土地恢复计划
[10:54] and my mob grazing soil rejuvenation plan. 就是种解脱
[10:58] Which requires not only a lot of faeces, 这不仅需要大量的粪便 还需要大量的母鸡
[11:01] but also a lot of hens.
[11:04] Come on girls, out you all come. 来吧 姑娘们 都出来
[11:06] Come on. 出来吧
[11:08] [Jeremy] And as my existing flock wasn’t big enough, 我目前养的不够多
[11:11] I got more from my egg-producing neighbours, Mr and Mrs Cacklebean, 我从生产鸡蛋的邻居 凯克斌夫妇那借来了一些
[11:16] who pitched up with a mobile henhouse that was so state of the art 他们装备了最先进的移动鸡舍
[11:20] it even had alloy wheels. 配有合金轮圈
[11:25] – [Steph] What do you think? – I’m amazed. – 你觉得怎么样? – 我很惊讶
[11:28] So high tech. 这么高科技 不会吧 但真的是!
[11:30] – [Steph laughs] – No, but it is!
[11:32] [Jeremy] So they roost… 所以它们住在…
[11:34] [Steph] On the bars in front of the nest boxes. 在巢箱前面的栏杆上 它们在巢箱中生蛋
[11:37] They should lay eggs in the nest boxes.
[11:39] [Jeremy] OK. Is this the water tank? 好的 这是水箱吗?
[11:42] [Steph] Yeah, cold water, so that goes through to the nipple drinkers, 是的 冷水流向乳头式饮水器 这样它们只要轻拍乳头就好
[11:46] so they tap the nipples.
[11:47] What man doesn’t like to tap a nipple? – 哪个男人不喜欢轻拍乳头? – 但它们是母的
[11:49] [Jeremy] But they’re women.
[11:51] Some women like to tap nipples. – 有些女人也喜欢轻拍乳头 – 我听说了!
[11:52] I’ve heard!
[11:54] Yeah, whoever wants to tap a nipple can tap a nipple. 不管谁想轻拍乳头 都可以轻拍乳头
[11:57] I once saw it on the internet. – 我在网上看到过 – 我希望你已经清除搜索历史了
[11:58] Oh, OK. I hope you cleared your search history.
[12:01] – What about the lighting? – All powered off the solar. – 照明怎么样? – 全都是太阳能供电
[12:05] It’s good, isn’t it? – So the whole thing is solar powered? – Yeah. – 全都是太阳能的? – 很好 不是吗?对
[12:09] – Steph? – [she laughs] 斯蒂芬 那是干什么用的?
[12:11] What’s that for?
[12:12] It’s a spot for foxes. Check the outside. 观察狐狸 查看外面的情况
[12:15] – That’s a fox spotting camera? – Fox spotting camera. 这是狐狸观察相机吗? 装有激光瞄准器吗?
[12:17] – Has it got laser targeting on it? – No, that’s over to you.
[12:19] 没有 这取决于你
[12:21] [Jeremy] Could I look at this on my phone? – 我可以在手机上看监控吗? – 你可以在你的手机上看
[12:22] You can, to make sure there’s nothing around.
[12:28] [Jeremy] Steph’s husband then arrived with my 50 new birds. 斯蒂芬的丈夫随后 给我带来了50只小鸡
[12:32] [shouts]
[12:34] [Steph] There you go, girls. 去吧 姑娘
[12:36] [Jeremy] They are beautiful looking hens, aren’t they? – 漂亮的母鸡 – 是的 漂亮
[12:38] [Steph] Yeah, they are.
[12:41] – OK. – That’s the way it goes. – 好的 – 就是这样
[12:44] [Jeremy] Next we erected the fencing, 然后我们竖起了栅栏
[12:46] which is essential in a mob grazing enterprise. 这对放牧场来说是必不可少的
[12:51] [Steph] Yeah, perfect. 是的 完美
[12:53] So here’s the idea. 我的想法就是这样 牛屎 牛屎 到处都是牛屎
[12:54] Cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit, cow shit everywhere.
[12:59] Hens come out, peck the worms and… What else do they eat out of that? 把母鸡放出来 抓虫子… 还有什么来着?
[13:03] [Paddy] They eat all the bugs. – 它们会吃掉所有的虫子 – 把牛粪里的虫都吃掉
[13:05] [Jeremy] All the bugs out of the shit,
[13:07] and then trample all the cow poo and their own 将牛粪和它们自己的鸡屎
[13:10] into the soil, making it healthy and vibrant. 踩入土中 让土壤变得健康 生机勃勃
[13:13] And then tomorrow, we move them there. 然后明天 我们把它们赶到那边
[13:17] [Paddy] Yep. [Jeremy] And bit by bit, they cover the whole field. – 是的 – 一点一点 就会覆盖整个牧场
[13:19] [Paddy] Yeah.
[13:21] [Steph] It’s the way forward. – 这就是接下来要做的 – 我要打开门板
[13:22] [Jeremy] I’m gonna open the flap.
[13:24] Let the eco farming begin. 一起搞生态农业吧
[13:29] [Steph] Here they come. – 它们来了 – 看 它们已经在吃草了
[13:30] [Paddy] Here they come. See, they’re already grazing.
[13:33] [Jeremy] Look, it’s doing it! 看 它在啄虫子!
[13:35] It’s actually eating the worms out of the faeces! 实际上是在吃粪便中的虫子!
[13:38] [laughs] [Jeremy] That’s what we’re here for. That’s brilliant. – 我们的目的达到了 – 我们的目的达到了
[13:41] Look at that faeces, what a feast. 看那坨粪便 真是一场盛宴!
[13:44] He’s treading in it, but that’s OK. 它正踩在上面 但没关系
[13:47] Tread it, squidge it into the soil. Go on, squidge. 踩它 把它压进土里 继续 压它
[13:51] [Jeremy] Paddy and Steph had actually dropped off two sheds, 帕蒂和斯蒂芬已经盖了两个棚子
[13:54] and there was a bit of a surprise in the second one. 第二个里有惊喜
[13:58] You’ve got a cockerel shed as well. 我们还有一个公鸡棚
[14:00] – A what shed? – [Paddy] A cockerel shed. – 什么棚? – 公鸡棚
[14:03] A shed full of cockerels. – 棚子里全是公鸡 – 公鸡又不下蛋
[14:04] Why am I having cockerels when they don’t produce any eggs?
[14:06] 为什么还要养公鸡?
[14:10] So the idea is that the cockerels, 是公鸡还是你给它们生命 这是一个伦理上的问题
[14:12] you give them life, which is very ethical.
[14:15] ‘Cause most of the cockerels in this country get killed at a day old. 这个国家里大多数的公鸡 才长一天就被杀死了
[14:18] – A day? – A day old, yeah. – 一天? – 一天
[14:20] Hours old. – 那它们会怎样? – 它们死了
[14:21] Hours old. They’re dead.
[14:23] – What happens to them? – [Paddy] Most of them get thrown away. – 大多数小公鸡都被扔了 不是吗? – 是的 像垃圾一样
[14:25] – [Paddy] They’re waste. – [Steph] Waste products.
[14:28] Are these cockerels that I’m getting delicious and nutritious? 我养的这些小公鸡好吃、有营养吗?
[14:33] They’re lovely. 它们很可爱
[14:34] – So you can eat them? – Yes. – 它们可以吃? – 公鸡可以吃
[14:36] You can eat cock.
[14:41] [Jeremy] Here we go. The cockerels are arriving. 我们到了 公鸡送来了
[14:44] – 25 How many are there again? 25? – 有多少只公鸡?
[14:45] [Steph] 25.
[14:47] Oh, look at you! – 看这只! – 它很帅
[14:49] – [Steph] He’s handsome, eh? – [Jeremy] Oh yeah. 真不赖!真是有两下子
[14:50] He is walking the walk.
[14:53] – [Steph laughs] – [cockerel crowing]
[14:55] [Jeremy] This is going to be my new soundtrack to life, isn’t it? – 这将成为我生活的新配乐? – 是的
[14:57] [Paddy] It is.
[14:58] [cockerel crowing]
[15:00] [Jeremy] Bloody hell! The racket! 天啊 真刺耳
[15:03] – [cockerel crowing] – [Steph] The cows are coming.
[15:05] 牛来了
[15:06] [Jeremy] Thinking: “Oh no, there’s some small, feathered cows in our field.” 在想:“我们牧场里来了些 长着羽毛的小奶牛”
[15:12] [Jeremy] With all this in place, 有它们在我的牧场里 我的土壤会变得健康
[15:14] my soil would become healthy and I’d have a steady supply of chicken,
[15:16] 我能为餐厅持续提供鸡肉 鸡蛋和牛肉
[15:18] eggs and beef for the restaurant.
[15:22] So I went to bed that night 因此 那天夜里我满意地入睡
[15:24] feeling rather contented.
[15:32] 凌晨3点58分
[15:35] [cockerel crowing]
[15:38] [crowing continues]
[15:45] The next morning, however, I wasn’t feeling quite so contented, 然而 第二天早上 我就觉得不太满意了
[15:49] because it turned out the cockerels were incredible escape artists. 因为事实证明 公鸡是杰出的逃脱艺术家
[15:55] You… They’re all out. 你…它们都跑出去了 所有的公鸡都跑出去了
[15:57] All the cockerels are out.
[15:58] – [crowing] – Fucking! 该死的…
[16:00] [Jeremy] Which meant they either ended up as fox food… 也就说它们要么已经 沦为狐狸的盘中餐…
[16:04] [Jeremy] The feathers are everywhere, look. 看 到处都是羽毛
[16:07] It’s like the killing fields. 就像屠宰场一样
[16:09] [Jeremy] Or they were over at the hen house, 或者它们就在鸡舍里扮演罗杰摩尔
[16:11] giving it the full Roger Moore.
[16:14] Right, come on, girls, out you all come. 来吧 姑娘们 出来吧
[16:18] Oh look, look! What! 看!怎么回事?
[16:24] You are cornered, you’re going down. 你没路走了 你完蛋了
[16:27] You’re not going down. 没完蛋
[16:31] Where’s that bloody cockerel? 那只该死的公鸡去哪了?
[16:35] Oh, there’s two in here. 这里有两只 不 是三只!
[16:37] No, there’s three.
[16:38] Oh my Christ, it’s an orgy! 天啊 野性的狂欢啊!
[16:41] Stop it! Got it, no I haven’t. Missed it. 停下 我抓到了 不 没抓着 给它溜了
[16:45] Oh shit! 全都是…该死的
[16:49] [Jeremy] But leaving aside the cockerel delinquency, 但抛开公鸡的恶行不谈
[16:52] the cows and the hens were already making a good team. 奶牛和母鸡已组成了一个很好的团队
[16:56] Straight into the faeces. 看看它们 直接踩到粪便上 看 抓大便 看!
[16:58] Look, scratching it. Look.
[17:00] You good hen. 你是一只好母鸡 我会颁给你一个生态铜牌 没错
[17:02] You’re gonna get an eco bronze medal you are.
[17:05] [lively music]
[17:12] [Jeremy] Later that day, I headed to the farm shop. 那天晚些时候 我去了农场商店
[17:15] Greetings, everybody. 大家好
[17:18] [Jeremy] My first batch of chili chutneys were ready, 因为我的第一批辣椒酱已经做好了
[17:21] and I wanted to do a bit of customer research. 我想调查一下客户
[17:25] Anyone here like chili? – 有人喜欢辣椒吗? – 有
[17:27] – [customers] Yeah. – [man] I love chili.
[17:28] Coming through. 借过
[17:29] [Jeremy] It’s like a 1970s Yorkshire wedding. 看 这就像上世纪70年代 约克郡的婚礼
[17:33] [Jeremy] First of all I asked people 首先 我请人们品尝中辣的版本
[17:35] to try the medium hot version.
[17:38] That’s good. – 好吃 – 好吃?
[17:40] – [Jeremy] Good. So you’d buy that? – I’d buy that. – 你会买吗? – 会
[17:43] It’s all right. It’s quite nice. 挺好的
[17:45] – 只是挺好? – 很不错
[17:47] – Very nice. I would buy that. – [Jeremy] Good. – 不错 我会买的 – 很好
[17:49] I think we’re onto something there. 很好 我们有特别的发现
[17:52] [Jeremy] Buoyed by this reaction, I then asked them to try 大家的反应鼓舞了我 于是我继续让大家来品尝极端版本
[17:54] the not medium version.
[17:58] Holy shit! 天啊
[18:00] [he laughs]
[18:03] Fucking hell! 这什么啊
[18:04] [laughter]
[18:07] [laugher]
[18:12] It’s ridiculous. 这也太辣了
[18:14] [Jeremy laughs]
[18:17] Jesus Christ. Oh! 我的天啊!
[18:22] Drink. 喝下去
[18:24] [Lisa] I think we’re gonna sell a lot of milk. – 我想我们会卖出很多牛奶 – 是的
[18:29] [Jeremy] Oh dear. Oh dear. [laughs] – 就这样 – 天呐
[18:31] [Lisa] More milk’s on the way. – 马上多拿些牛奶来 – 谢谢
[18:34] [soft music]
[18:44] 凌晨4点01分
[18:46] [cockerels crowing]
[18:50] [Jeremy] Our new early morning alarm system was actually coming in useful, 随着奶牛的照养工作越来越忙碌
[18:55] as life with the cows was getting… 我们全新的闹钟系统其实挺有用的
[18:58] much busier.
[18:59] [upbeat music]
[19:01] The calves, for example, were now old enough 小牛已经足够大了 可以断奶了
[19:04] to be weaned off their mother’s milk,
[19:06] which meant taking them to another field on the far side of the farm. 应该把它们带到农场另一端的 另一个牧场里了
[19:13] Look at all this new, fresh grass we have given them. 看看我们给它们喂的这些新鲜的草
[19:16] This is called Cow Ground. 这里被称为牛场 是农场里最漂亮的牧场之一
[19:18] It’s one of the prettiest fields on the farm.
[19:20] Yes, what do you think of that? 是啊 你怎么看?
[19:23] [mooing]
[19:25] [Lisa] They seem happy enough. – 它们看起来很开心 – 看这美丽的景象
[19:26] Look at that. Isn’t that a lovely sight?
[19:28] [Lisa] Yeah. – 难道不美吗? – 美
[19:30] [Jeremy] Unfortunately, however, 然而 很不幸 它们对新家并没有这种浪漫的看法
[19:32] the youngsters didn’t share this romantic view of their new home.
[19:40] [thunder rumbling] 第二天
[19:42] What is missing from this picture? 这画面中缺少了什么?
[19:46] All the veals, they’ve escaped. 所有的小牛都逃走了
[19:49] A neighbouring farmer has eight of them 隔壁农民院子里有八头
[19:52] in his yard,
[19:54] which I’ve got to go and get back, 我必须过去把它们带回来
[19:57] but one of them is missing. 但有一头牛不见了
[19:59] And we’ve got to find her. 我们必须找到它
[20:06] That’s the veal in a neighbouring farmer’s field. 那头就是跑到隔壁农场里的小牛
[20:09] Bad veal! 淘气的小牛!
[20:12] This is our neighbouring farmer, whose fields we are ripping to shreds. 他是辛苦劳作的农民 而我们正把他的田地弄得支离破碎
[20:16] [Lisa] Shall I do the apologies? He doesn’t look very happy… 我要去道歉吗?他看起来不太高兴
[20:21] [Lisa] I’m so sorry. 我很抱歉
[20:23] [Jeremy] I’m sorry about this. 这件事 真的很对不起
[20:26] [Kaleb] Sorry. I do apologise. 对不起 我很抱歉
[20:29] [mooing]
[20:40] [mooing]
[20:41] [Jeremy] I was hoping this would be a one-off incident. 我希望以后不会再发生这样的事
[20:45] [lively music]
[20:47] But it turned out the calves were even more escape-y 但事实证明小牛比公鸡更擅长逃脱
[20:50] than the cockerels.
[20:53] Hello, the cows are out. 奶牛出来了
[21:02] Fucking hell! 真该死
[21:05] I’m really, really sorry. 我真的很抱歉
[21:14] [he whistles]
[21:16] [Kaleb] Two, four, six, eight, nine. 三、四、六、八、九
[21:20] [lively music]
[21:22] Good. 很好!
[21:33] [Kaleb] I’m really sorry. 我真的很抱歉
[21:41] All right, Gerald? 杰拉德!它们又出来了
[21:44] They got out again.
[21:46] Now they’re away from their mums, you’ll have a job to keep them in!
[21:49] [Gerald speaking indistinctly]
[21:52] I was surprised to see they wasn’t back up there with them.
[21:55] They decide to just crack and go through it.
[21:58] You’ve got three strands of bush nearly all round
[22:01] to keep cattle in, haven’t you?
[22:04] But you know.
[22:10] [Jeremy] Hold on. 等一下
[22:11] This is their hoof marks. 这是它们的蹄印
[22:15] They’ve come through here. 它们已经到这边来了
[22:18] Two o’clock this morning, 今天凌晨2点
[22:20] I get the alarm on the phone, 鸡舍的电话闹钟叫醒了我 每天晚上2点
[22:21] hen houses have gone wrong, happens every night at two.
[22:24] And then six o’clock, 然后6点操作相机的人 打来了电话 奶牛又跑出来了
[22:26] the man operating that camera’s on the phone.
[22:28] “Your cows are out, again.”
[22:32] God, where are you? Fern! 天啊 你们去哪了?
[22:35] Cow pat. Faeces. Cow faeces. 牛屎 粪便 牛粪
[22:39] There they are. 它们在那里
[22:41] [soft music]
[22:44] [Jeremy] Come on, cows. 来吧 奶牛们
[22:47] [Jeremy] There was no doubt that the early morning cow round-up 毫无疑问 大早上把奶牛圈起来
[22:50] was a lovely way to start the day. 是开始新的一天的好方式
[22:54] [soft music continues] 来吧
[22:59] [Jeremy] Good cows. 乖乖牛
[23:01] [Jeremy] But this was the fourth escape in ten days. 但这是10天内的第四次逃跑
[23:05] So I had to do a proper job of mending the fence in their field. 我必须把牧场的栅栏修好
[23:11] [Kaleb] Did you repair that? 那个是你修的吗?
[23:15] It wasn’t me! 不是我 你能不能看看… 是你修的 不是吗?
[23:17] That was you, wasn’t it?
[23:20] That’s fucking appalling! Look at it! 这真是太可怕了 看看这个!
[23:23] I’ll grant you it’s not aesthetically pleasing. 我承认 这在美学上并不令人愉悦
[23:26] [Jeremy] Kaleb then instructed me 卡莱布告诉我农民 通常会如何处理这个问题
[23:28] on how farmers would typically deal with this problem.
[23:32] – That’s it and then you hold it… – You want me to do this? – 就是这样 扶住那边 – 你要我这样做吗?
[23:35] [Kaleb] Yeah. And then get a post and hold the post as well there, 然后找一根杆 在这扶住杆 我会把那根杆推到这个后面
[23:38] and then I’ll push that post in behind this one.
[23:40] – That make sense? – No. – 听懂了吗? – 没有
[23:42] It’s easy. 这很简单
[23:43] There you go. 开始吧
[23:45] – Right, and that’s gonna go behind… – This post here. – 这根放在后面 – 这根放这里
[23:48] – That one. – Yeah. [Jeremy] So I hold the fence up with two arms 我用两只手臂扶着栅栏
[23:50] and then with my other arm I pick up that new post 然后 我用另一只手拿起新的杆
[23:54] and then measure it with my other arm. 用我的另一只胳膊量一下
[23:56] Yeah, it’s not hard. 是的 这并不难
[23:58] [engine]
[24:00] [grunts]
[24:01] There it is. 好了
[24:04] No. You don’t… 不 你不…
[24:07] fucking hell, mate. 该死的 兄弟
[24:16] This is totally safe, isn’t it? Yeah. 这很安全 不是吗?
[24:19] I’m sure this is in every manual 我肯定每一本关于 农场安全的手册上都有这个
[24:21] on how to stay safe on the farm.
[24:25] Shit, don’t lower it now, you’ll break my arm off. 现在不要放低 你会把我的手弄断的
[24:27] [Kaleb] I’ll hold it with this. 我用这个扶着
[24:29] No, Kaleb, I don’t like… That’s ridiculous. 不 卡莱布 我不喜欢…这太荒谬了
[24:32] [Kaleb] It’s fine. Now get the post. 没关系 现在把杆拿来
[24:38] [Kaleb] You ready to hold this fence? 你准备好扶栅栏了吗?
[24:40] – What? – [Kaleb] Hold the fence. You ready? – 什么? – 扶着栅栏 你准备好了吗?
[24:43] [Jeremy screams]
[24:49] Ah, fucking hell! 该死的!天啊!
[24:51] Shit!
[24:57] Fuck! – 该死的! – 你没事吧?
[24:59] – [Kaleb] You all right? – No. 我有事
[25:03] Oh, hang on. 等一下
[25:04] [shouts in pain] Oh fuck no! I’m not sure this is good. 该死的!不知道这行不行
[25:09] [groans]
[25:10] [pants]
[25:14] [Jeremy pants]
[25:17] [Kaleb] Do you want me to ring Lisa for a bag of peas? – 你想打电话问丽莎要镇痛冰袋吗? – 不想
[25:19] [Jeremy] No.
[25:23] [Jeremy] This incident reminded me that it was time to do something 这次事故提醒我去做一件
[25:26] that I’d been putting off forever. 一直被我拖延的事
[25:29] [woman] Hello, and welcome to Agriculture Health and Safety. 您好 欢迎观看农业健康与安全
[25:33] This Lantra course, developed with HSE assistance, 本课程将帮助您识别和管理安全风险
[25:35] will help you identify and manage safety risks.
[25:38] If you control or manage the farm, 如果您是农场管理员 您需要为您自身和您的员工
[25:40] you are legally responsible for your safety
[25:41] and that of your employees, contractors, visitors 承包商和访客
[25:43] 以及所有被您工作影响的人的 安全问题承担责任
[25:45] and anyone affected by…
[25:47] …so that lower supporting bails are stabilised 把上层的捆包叠在一起
[25:49] by overlapping and interlocking upper bails… 扣紧 稳定支撑包…
[25:52] If you’re a self-employed farmer, safety law applies to you. 安全法始终使适用
[25:56] Compliance with the law protects you, 合规的做法能保护您 让您…
[25:59] – makes you much less likely to be hurt… – [yawning] God. 天啊
[26:01] [woman] …your boundaries and mark them on a map. 将工作场所的所有架空电力线
[26:05] 标记在地图上 进行风险评估
[26:06] Do a risk assessment.
[26:08] You and the contractor should be aware of these findings. 您和承包商应了解调查结果
[26:11] Provide information, instruction and training to your employees 为员工提供信息、指导和培训
[26:15] if they are involved in any work with the contractor. 如涉及承包商的工作 还应提供任何有关信息…
[26:17] You should also provide any information to…
[26:20] [Jeremy] Mercifully, Kaleb eventually rescued me 幸好有卡莱布把我
[26:23] from the torture of Health and Safety instructions 从健康和安全指示的折磨中拯救出来
[26:26] by calling to say our giant new water tank had arrived. 他打电话告诉我 我们巨大的新水箱已经到了
[26:32] [Jeremy] 20,000 litres of water. – 能装两万升水 – 是的
[26:36] [Kaleb] Yeah. Free oxygenated soft rainwater 含游离氧的软雨水从屋顶流到这
[26:39] will come off that roof and into here.
[26:43] [back-up beeper]
[26:47] [laughs]
[26:49] Clown. 没错 小丑一个
[26:51] [Jeremy] Right.
[26:53] Just lower that down and let’s see what the levels do. 放下来 我们看看水平高度
[27:00] [Kaleb] Too much. You reckon that’s too much of a lean? – 太多了 – 倾斜太多了?
[27:03] – I don’t think it’s gonna work. – What isn’t? 我觉得这不行
[27:05] – 什么不行? – 我们必须在下面放一个混凝土垫
[27:06] We’re gonna have to put a concrete pad down.
[27:09] [Jeremy] Dream on. 做梦吧
[27:11] Every bit of concrete in the country is currently being used by HS2. 这个国家里的混凝土 现在都归HS2项目
[27:15] They’re building a railway 他们在建一条从伦敦经停利物浦
[27:17] that goes from London to Liverpool or Manchester or something,
[27:18] 到曼彻斯特的铁路 会快12分钟
[27:20] about 12 minutes faster.
[27:22] It’s costing billions of pounds 耗资数十亿英镑 并且用上了英国所有的混凝土
[27:24] and it’s using every bit of concrete in Britain.
[27:28] I mean, who needs a railway? 谁需要铁路?
[27:30] I’ve never been on a train, so I don’t need a railway. 我从来没有坐过火车 所以我不需要
[27:34] – What? – I’ve never been on a train. – 什么? – 我从来没有坐过火车 从没有
[27:36] Never.
[27:38] – That’s not possible. – Prove it. How… 这不可能
[27:40] 证明给我看 不然…我可以… 你过过我的生活吗?
[27:42] Have you lived me?
[27:44] Have you been me? No. 你有我的人生经历吗?没有
[27:48] [Jeremy] I couldn’t argue with that, but I wasn’t wrong about the concrete. 我无法反驳 但混凝土这个事我没有说错
[27:53] So the next day we decided to relocate the water tank 于是第二天 我们决定给水箱换个位置
[27:57] to the other side of the barn. 搬到谷仓的另一边
[28:00] [Jeremy] You’ve got that 你成功了 不过顶上还要放东西 对吗?
[28:02] but then there’s a thing that goes on top of it, yeah?
[28:04] I think I’ve worked it out. 我已经有了解决方案
[28:07] [Jeremy] Job one was to fit all the components 首先是要安装水箱顶部的组件
[28:10] which go on the top of the tank.
[28:12] So Kaleb suggested I fire up the farm’s scissor lift. 卡莱布建议我用农场里的剪架升降台
[28:16] [back-up beeper]
[28:19] I once went up in one of these– Oh fucking hell! 我以前有次站在这个上面…真该死!
[28:23] [woman] Welcome to module two. Falls from height. 欢迎来到模块二 高空坠物
[28:26] [snoring]
[28:29] No ! – [Jeremy shouts] – [Kaleb laughs] 不!
[28:31] – [alarm] – It’s not gonna let you down now. 它现在不想让你下来
[28:34] – It’s made– Stop doing that! – [alarm] 它正在…快住手!
[28:38] [Kaleb laughs] [Kaleb] Now go up! 你现在位置很高
[28:40] No, down! Why won’t it go down anymore? 不 下来 它为什么不降下来?
[28:43] – [Kaleb] I got you, go back up. – Oh fuck off! – 有我呢 再上去 – 滚!
[28:46] [Kaleb laughs]
[28:49] Go and get a ladder. 去拿梯子
[28:51] – This is fine, look. – It’s not fine! – 这很好 你看 – 这不好!
[28:53] – [clanking] – [Jeremy] Ow!
[28:56] I hate this thing. 我讨厌这个东西
[28:58] – [Jeremy] Are you sure you’ve got it? – Yeah, yeah. – 你肯定你会操作了? – 是的
[29:01] [Kaleb] You get that end and I’ll get this end. 你到那头去 我来搞定这边
[29:04] [Jeremy] Moaning about the weather. 抱怨天气
[29:07] Stop it, stop being a twat. Back up. 别抱怨了 别做讨厌鬼
[29:09] 退一点 往前
[29:11] Forwards. [Kaleb] What do you mean, forwards? – 你什么意思? – 是这样吗?
[29:13] Is that it? It’s not on yet. One minute, I’ve got it. 装上去了 不 还没有 我要把这个安上去
[29:16] There you go, that’s on. I’m on. 好了 装好了 我装好了
[29:18] – Come on, push. – I am pushing. – 推 – 等一下 我在推
[29:20] No, push like a man, not like some little baby goat. 像男人一样用力推 而不是跟软绵绵的小山羊一样
[29:24] Get this off first of all. 首先 把这个拿掉
[29:28] Have you…
[29:30] Oh fucking hell! 真该死
[29:34] – [Kaleb groaning] – You in? – 你接上了吗? – 嗯
[29:36] [Kaleb] Yeah. – Don’t knock me off. – [Kaleb laughs] 别把我弄倒了
[29:39] – [Jeremy] There. – There, we’re on. – 好了 – 好了 我们装好了
[29:41] [Jeremy groans] Fucking hell. 真该死
[29:43] 61 years old, having to do something… ‘Cause how old are you? 23. 61岁了还不得不做… 你多大?23岁
[29:48] – It’s your show. – [Jeremy laughs] 这是你的节目
[29:49] [Jeremy] Oh, is it? Everyone get that? 是吗?大家都知道?
[29:53] – Everyone hear that? – [Kaleb laughs] 大家都听说了吗?
[30:01] 凌晨4点6分
[30:02] [cockerels crowing]
[30:08] [upbeat music]
[30:10] [Jeremy] It was now time to ensure 现在要确保能向餐厅持续供应牛肉
[30:12] a steady supply of beef for the restaurant,
[30:15] which meant getting the cows that weren’t pregnant… pregnant. 就要让没有怀孕的母牛怀孕
[30:20] And since this would mean inserting things in them, 要给它们插入一些东西
[30:23] Kaleb said I’d need to invest in a contraption called a “crush”. 卡莱布说我要投资 一个叫做分栏器的巧妙装置
[30:29] – So the cow goes in… – This side. – 牛进去… – 这边
[30:32] – Goes in there. – Yeah, walks through. – 到这里面去 – 是的 走进去…
[30:34] And then its head come… Where does its head go? 然后头从这边探出来… 它的头要往哪里?
[30:37] – Oh, it’s in there. – There, look. That comes out, actually. 就像这样 探出来
[30:40] – [Kaleb] That bar there, yeah? – Yeah? – 从那个栏杆那里? – 是的
[30:42] [Kaleb] That goes in here to jam their arse up. 进去 然后塞到它们的屁股里
[30:44] [Jeremy] Holy shit… 天啊
[30:47] Max Mosley would have paid a fortune to have a go in this. 马克斯莫斯利愿意花一大笔钱 尝试干这个
[30:50] And then that comes in like that and jams their head in. – 牛进来 然后把头塞进去 – 什么?
[30:53] What? How much does this weigh? Is it very heavy? – 多少…它重吗? – 天啊 我们需要装载机
[30:55] You need the loader.
[30:57] Here’s the thing, if I’m gonna set this up, 事情是这样的 如果要把这个设置好 我要半个小时
[30:59] it’s gonna take me half an hour.
[31:01] And then if you’re gonna help, it’s gonna take us an hour. – 嗯 – 如果你帮忙的话 需要一个小时
[31:05] – It won’t take you an hour. – [Kaleb] It will. 用不了你一个小时 我今天早上要用装载机
[31:07] I’m going to use the loader this morning.
[31:10] [Kaleb] Gently. 轻轻地!
[31:14] [Jeremy] Once I’d got the crush into position, – 我把分栏器安置好后 – 这边
[31:18] we had to build the pen that attaches to it. 我们还得给它建一个附属的畜栏
[31:22] Ready ? 准备好了吗?
[31:25] Fuck! 该死的
[31:27] Ow, fucking hell. 真该死
[31:28] [Kaleb] Such a wimp. – 真是个胆小鬼 – 什么?我要继续我的工作!
[31:30] What do you mean? I’m carrying on with my work.
[31:33] [upbeat music]
[31:41] – Is this big enough? – Yeah. – 够大吗? – 嗯 让它们一起嘎吱嘎吱
[31:42] We don’t want them too spaced out. You want them all crunched together.
[31:48] This is quite cool. You’ve actually got a good one here. – 你这个真的很不错 – 很好
[31:51] – Good. – [Kaleb] How much did it cost? – 花了多少钱? – 一万英镑
[31:52] [Jeremy] £10,000 this was.
[31:54] Fucking hell! – 老天啊! – 我知道
[31:55] I know, I know.
[31:58] [Jeremy] With the pen assembled, we went off to round up the cows. 准备好畜栏后 我们就去围捕奶牛了
[32:05] Dunno how I feel about you walking with a stick. 没想到你会用手杖
[32:08] [Jeremy] I like it. 我喜欢这玩意
[32:09] It makes me look like a… I’m starting to feel farmish. 它让我看起来… 让我觉得自己很有农家风格
[32:12] You know, I’m starting to understand little things about the countryside now. 我开始了解关于农村的一些小事
[32:16] That’s the problem. You only understand little things. 你只懂小事
[32:20] [Jeremy] Aha, I’ve found them. 我找到它们了
[32:22] I love this. 我喜欢这样
[32:24] They don’t look surprised or frightened, 当你靠近它们时 它们看起来 一点也不惊讶、害怕或恐惧
[32:27] or intimidated in any way when you approach.
[32:30] They just stare. Look at Pepper over on the left there. 它们只是盯着你看 看左边的胡椒
[32:34] They’re like six-year-old kids when you walk into a classroom. 它们就像六岁大的孩子 看到有人走进教室时那么盯着看
[32:38] You know a six-year-old kid, and a grown-up walks in… 六岁大的孩子看到大人走进来时那样
[32:42] They’re not frightened. Exactly that. 不会感到恐惧 正是这样
[32:45] – That’s Kaleb’s cow impression. – Ready? 这就是卡莱布对牛的印象
[32:48] Here we go. – 准备好了 – 我们开始吧
[32:50] [Kaleb] So let’s just gently walk them round. 我们轻轻地绕着它们走
[32:53] Come on then, steady. – 来吧 保持住 – 走 乖乖牛们
[32:55] [Jeremy] Go on, Mooties.
[32:56] [Kaleb calls the cows] Steady.
[32:57] – 保持住 – 继续前进
[32:59] [Jeremy] Go on.
[33:00] – Ah, Dilwyn! – [Dilwyn] Yeah. – 迪尔翁! – 嗯
[33:02] [Jeremy] They actually want to go in the crush. 它们实际上想进去 看
[33:05] [Kaleb] Oh my God! 我的天啊
[33:07] [Jeremy] That is easy. 这很容易 我们以前养羊时 没做到这样 不是吗?
[33:09] We never managed this with the sheep, did we?
[33:12] [Jeremy] Even though we’d rounded up all the cows, 尽管我们把所有的奶牛都围起来了 但迪尔翁只对两只年轻的小母牛
[33:14] it was just the two young heifers
[33:17] that Dilwyn would be artificially inseminating. 进行人工授精
[33:20] And today was just part one of the procedure. 今天只是完成部分的程序
[33:24] So it’s just Deeny and Pepper that you need? – 你要给迪尼和胡椒做? – 是的 我要让它们发情
[33:26] Yeah, I’m bringing them on heat, basically.
[33:28] I’m gonna put a progesterone-releasing intra-vaginal device 我要在它们的阴道内
[33:31] 放入黄体酮释放装置
[33:33] into the vagina,
[33:35] and then, when we take it out, 然后再取出来 让它们发情
[33:37] that’ll bring them on heat and then you can serve them with AI after that.
[33:38] 然后你可以通过人工授精为它们服务
[33:41] [lively music]
[33:43] [Jeremy] Dilwyn said the easiest way of tackling the job 迪尔翁说完成这项任务最简单的方法
[33:46] was to run all the cows through the Max Mosley machine 就是让所有奶牛通过马克斯莫斯利机
[33:50] until we got to the heifers. 直到小母牛过来
[33:53] [Jeremy] Go on, in you go. – 去吧 你给我进去 去吧 – 去吧
[33:55] [Kaleb] Go on. Give it one.
[33:57] Come on. – 来吧 – 我像在跟甘道夫一起工作
[33:58] It’s like working with Gandalf.
[34:00] [Kaleb laughs]
[34:01] [Jeremy] Come on. 来吧
[34:03] [Kaleb] Go on then. Go on! 前进 继续前进
[34:05] [Jeremy] Come on, in you go. 去吧 你快给我进去
[34:07] No. Now they’ve all escaped. 不好了 它们都逃走了 打到头了
[34:09] Oh, on the head.
[34:11] Bring them all round again. 我会再把它们全都赶回来 过来!
[34:13] [Kaleb] Go on!
[34:14] Stop him.
[34:17] [Jeremy] Come on. No. 拜托 不 不是这样的
[34:18] Not that way. Wrong, wrong…
[34:20] 全都错了
[34:21] 15分钟后
[34:26] [Jeremy] Go on. Go on! 进去!
[34:28] – [Kaleb] Go on. – [Jeremy] Go on cows! – 进去! – 进去吧 奶牛们!
[34:37] Go on! That way. 进去!往那边去
[34:39] Go on! Go on! 进去!
[34:41] [mooing]
[34:45] Bribery. We’ve tried the stick. Now we’re using the carrot. 贿赂它们 我们已经试过棍子了 现在让我们用胡萝卜
[34:51] [Jeremy] Backing up. It’s backing up. 它退后了
[34:53] Yeah, it’s now fully reversed back where it came from. 现在全退回到来的地方了
[34:57] They don’t like the crush. 到分栏器外面了
[35:00] What about money? – 钱呢? – 什么?
[35:02] – What? – Oh, I don’t know. I mean… I’m so cold and wet 我不知道 我现在又冷又湿又难过
[35:06] and unhappy.
[35:08] I can’t… 我不能…
[35:12] [Jeremy] My cows are as disobedient as my sheep, 我的牛和我的羊一样不听话
[35:14] it’s pouring with rain, 天上下着倾盆大雨 我的鞋子沾满了粪便
[35:16] my shoes are covered in excrement.
[35:17] I don’t know why I find this funny. [laughs] 我不知道为什么我觉得这很有趣
[35:20] It’s because you’ve never experienced boating in the Mediterranean 因为你从未在地中海划过船
[35:25] or eating an agreeable pasta… 或者吃过好吃的…
[35:27] Let’s just make this a bit smaller. Grab that one there. 我们把圈变小 抓住那头
[35:30] Jeremy, grab that. 杰里米 抓住那头
[35:33] – [Jeremy] Go on! – [Kaleb] Go on! 进去
[35:35] Go on! 进去!
[35:37] [Jeremy] Mercifully we finally got Deeny into the crush. 好在我们终于让迪尼进入了分栏器
[35:43] So I’ve gotta put my hand in her, just to check that she’s all there. 我必须把手伸进去 看看它是不是
[35:48] [Jeremy] I wouldn’t do it now. She’s cleaning the… What do you mean? 现在不行
[35:50] 她正在清洁…你什么意思?
[35:52] [Dilwyn] That she’s got a womb and ovaries. 她有子宫和卵巢
[35:56] [Kaleb] That sounds like a balloon, and I’m terrified of balloons. 听起来像气球一样 气球让我恐惧
[36:00] [Jeremy] Terrified? – 恐惧 这么重的词 – 巨大的恐惧 你不懂
[36:01] Massive fear. You have no idea.
[36:04] Wouldn’t go in a room if there was a balloon there. – 不敢去有气球的房间 – 真的吗?
[36:06] – [Jeremy] Really ? – Yeah.
[36:08] Shit scared. Like… 真是吓死人了
[36:11] Don’t tell anyone that. 不要告诉别人
[36:14] [Dilwyn] I’ll see if she’s all there. 我们看看它是不是可以
[36:17] [Jeremy] This is like a prostate but on an industrial level. 就像给男性做前列腺检查 但是工业水准的
[36:22] [Dilwyn] All about…
[36:24] [Jeremy] Holy mother… 天…
[36:30] There’s a womb. 有子宫 它很好 它没问题
[36:31] Which is good.
[36:33] She’s fine.
[36:34] She’s got all the bits? – 它啥都有了? – 是的 它有
[36:36] [Dilwyn] Yeah, she has.
[36:37] [Jeremy] What the hell’s that? 那到底是什么?
[36:39] [Dilwyn] That’s the shit. – 是屎 – 我以为你是把手伸进它的阴道?
[36:41] [Jeremy] I thought you went in its vagina.
[36:43] [Dilwyn] I did it rectally. So basically I go in rectally. – 我是通过直肠 所以 基本上… – 什么?
[36:46] And I can feel the uterus from the outside. 我从外面感觉到了子宫
[36:49] – So you’ve got to go up the back door? – [Dilwyn] Yes. – 所以你必须从后门走吗? – 是的
[36:52] [Dilwyn] So now I’m gonna put the pred in. 现在我要把“种子”放进去 这是浸渍剂 孕激素
[36:56] That’s impregnating the progesterone.
[36:58] It’s one of the sex hormones. – 是一种性激素 – 会引起排卵吗?
[37:00] So this will cause the ovulation to start?
[37:02] Well, taking it out will. 拿出来的时候会 从而开始下一个周期
[37:03] That will start the next cycle.
[37:05] And how long is it gonna be in for? – 那个要放在它体内多久? – 一个星期
[37:07] – A week. – OK.
[37:09] [Jeremy] Here we go, the triangle of procreation is on its way. 我们开始吧 生产三角器要进去了
[37:13] [Dilwyn] Yeah. I would have thought so. 嗯 差不多是这样
[37:17] [Dilwyn] Wow wow…
[37:20] There you go. Go on. 好了 你走吧
[37:21] [Jeremy] Go on! Go on, yes! 走吧 不 走 对
[37:26] [Jeremy] Finally it was Pepper’s turn. 终于 轮到胡椒了
[37:30] Calm down, Pepper, there’s a good cow. I like this one. 冷静 胡椒 你是一头好牛 我喜欢这头
[37:33] [Dilwyn] There. Yeah, she’s fine. 好了 它很好
[37:36] Right, release the cows. 好的 把牛放了
[37:42] So we’ve herded them all the way round here, 我们把它们都赶到这 圈进去 喊了一个小时
[37:44] put them in here, shouted at them for an hour
[37:46] and then released them and they’ve got to think, “Why?” 然后放了它们 它们肯定会想:“为什么?”
[37:51] [Jeremy] Look, she’s holding her tail up. 看 它把尾巴翘起来了 胡椒!
[37:54] Oh, Pepper!
[37:57] [Jeremy] As we now had to wait a week 我们现在要等一个星期 才能进行人工授精…
[37:59] until the artificial insemination could happen…
[38:03] [upbeat music]
[38:04] [Kaleb] Ready ? 准备好了?
[38:06] [Jeremy] …Kaleb and his brother Kieron 卡莱布和他的兄弟基兰 准备要开始修理栅栏了
[38:07] set about repairing the cow fence properly…
[38:14] whilst I decided to catch up on some maintenance jobs. 而我决定把之前 没做的维护工作给做了
[38:19] Right, now then. 没错 现在 上升 准备起飞吧
[38:20] Up, up and away.
[38:22] [Jeremy] Starting with the unruly hedge opposite Gerald’s house. 从杰拉德房子对面 乱七八糟的树篱开始
[38:27] Hedge clipping. 修剪树篱!
[38:33] Yes. 是的
[38:35] Lovely, lovely. 真棒
[38:39] All right Gerald. 嗨 杰拉德
[38:40] The G-dog is going to be dead chuffed 杰狗要高兴死了
[38:44] that I’ve been out and sorted his hedge out for him. 我来帮他整理好这些树篱
[38:50] [Gerald] Jesus fucking Christ.
[38:55] Oh Jeremy!
[39:02] Christ now turn that machine off or else it’s gonna take that hedge out,
[39:05] for God’s sake.
[39:07] That wasn’t the hedge that… [indistinct]
[39:10] [Gerald speaks indistinctly]
[39:12] [Kaleb] Fucking hell! 搞什么鬼!
[39:14] What the fuck is he doing? 他到底在做什么?
[39:17] Look at that. He’s missed all the brambles! 看 他没弄走荆棘 我告诉他从下面开始 然后往上
[39:19] I told him to start from the bottom and then work up.
[39:22] [Gerald] That’s like putting a tee-shirt on your back
[39:24] to make some bloody holes… [indistinct]
[39:27] If you was a pigeon… [indistinct]
[39:35] Here you are, mate, tell him off. 你去谴责他吧
[39:40] I said… [Gerald speaks indistinctly]
[39:46] [Gerald continues speaking indistinctly]
[39:57] You’re not happy, then? 这说明你并不开心?
[40:01] Right, well that’s me sacked then. 是的 那我被解雇了
[40:11] I honestly didn’t think I was doing that bad a job. 老实说 我没想到我做得那么糟糕
[40:14] [lively music]
[40:17] [Jeremy] Seven days after Dilwyn’s visit, 在迪尔翁到访的七天后 很明显小母牛
[40:19] it was pretty clear that the heifers were now on heat.
[40:21] 正在发情
[40:24] [lively music continues]
[40:26] [mooing]
[40:32] [Jeremy] Don’t do that, it’s disgusting! 不 别这样 这很恶心
[40:38] I know some of you 我知道你们中的有些人在担心
[40:41] will have been concerned the other day,
[40:43] when Dilwyn the vet put his entire arm inside… 那天迪尔翁兽医把他的整个手臂
[40:48] inside the heifers, but really, 塞到小母牛里面 不过不用担心 因为第二天早上
[40:50] there’s no need to worry because the next morning
[40:54] I got a photograph, not a very good one, but a photograph nevertheless, 我拍了一张照片 拍得不太好 但毕竟是一张
[40:58] of Deeny the heifer who was… 迪尼的照片 就是那头被他碰了的
[41:01] touched. 小母牛 然后…
[41:03] And…
[41:06] There’s a photograph. 在这张照片中 你看 它独自一人走进了分栏器
[41:07] She just walked into the crush all by herself.
[41:10] [laughs]
[41:12] “Where’s that Welshman with the glove? Where is he? “那个戴手套的威尔士人在哪里? 他在哪里?”
[41:16] If you stand here it’s quite nice.” “你站在这 挺好的”
[41:18] Anyway, we’ve gotta make them pregnant now. 无论如何 我们现在必须让它们怀孕
[41:22] Come on cows, time to be made pregnant. Well, two of you. 来吧 奶牛们 是时候怀孕了 好吧 你们两个
[41:25] Go on. Go on. 走
[41:28] Go on. [Jeremy] That meant once more herding them towards the crush. 就是说要再一次把它们引到分栏器那
[41:32] Go on. No, no, no, no. 走 不
[41:35] Stop it! 别搞了!走
[41:37] Go on.
[41:41] [Lisa] Come on, girlies. 来吧 姑娘们!
[41:45] [Jeremy] Have you seen the amount of sex that’s going on? 你们看到这儿高涨的情欲了吗? 就好像是农场的性派对
[41:47] It’s like being at a sixth form party, this is.
[41:51] Oh shit, did you see that? 真该死 你看到了吗? 欲望让它们疯狂
[41:54] They’re being driven mad by lust.
[41:56] [Jeremy] As we finished getting them into the pen, 当我们把它们赶入畜栏后
[41:59] Charlie, Dilwyn and Tim the cowman arrived with the gentleman juice. 查理、迪尔翁和放牧人蒂姆 带着绅士液体来了
[42:05] – Is that seriously all sperm? – No. 这里面真的全都是精子吗?
[42:07] [Charlie] There’s liquid nitrogen in there as well. – 不 里面还有液氮 – 是为了保持低温?
[42:10] – [Jeremy] Oh, so keeping it cool. – [Tim] To keep it cool.
[42:12] [Jeremy] After once more demonstrating my new herding skills… 在再次展示了我新掌握的 放牧技能后…
[42:16] No, stop. 站住
[42:19] Stop. 站住!
[42:21] [Jeremy] We got Pepper into the crush for her semen injection. 我们把胡椒赶入了分栏器 好给它注射精液
[42:25] [Dilwyn] That’s a straw. – 那是一根管子 – 那是一根管子?
[42:26] [Jeremy] That’s a straw. I don’t know what a straw is.
[42:28] 居然不知道什么才是管子
[42:30] – [Lisa] Syringe. – [Jeremy] One syringe. – 注射器 – 一个注射器
[42:31] It doesn’t look like there’s that much sperm. Is it just that tiny bit? 看起来好像没有那么多的精液
[42:35] [Jeremy] Is it 10cc? 是10立方厘米吗?
[42:36] [Dilwyn] Less than that. – 大约1毫升 – 不 这是男性的
[42:38] No, it’s the average amount a man ejaculates.
[42:39] 平均射精量
[42:41] That’s why the band was called 10cc. Did nobody know that? 所以那个乐队叫10cc
[42:43] [Charlie] No. – 没有人知道吗? – 没有
[42:45] [Tim] Then your straw goes in the gun. – 然后把管子放入枪口内 – 枪?
[42:47] [Charlie] In the gun?
[42:49] – [Tim] In the AI gun. – [Charlie] AI gun. – 人工授精枪 – 这真是激动人心
[42:50] This is actually quite an exciting moment.
[42:52] And you put it down your back to keep it warm. – 把它放到背后面保持温度 – 什么?
[42:55] What?
[42:57] [Jeremy] I see, while you put on the Heriots. – 在你给它受精的同时 – 你给它做人工授精
[42:59] [Tim] You put on the Heriots.
[43:01] Then… 然后…
[43:04] [Lisa] What are you feeling for? 你在摸什么?
[43:06] [Tim] Right, I’ve got the cervix in my hand now. 我的手抓到了子宫颈
[43:09] Now she’s straining on my hand. 它正往我的手顶
[43:12] – So it’s gotta to through the cervix? – [Lisa] Yeah, right in. – 必须通过子宫颈? – 是的
[43:14] [Tim] And then, as it come through her cervix there 通过子宫颈时 慢慢地
[43:18] and just slowly let it go. [Lisa] Release. – 射出 – 把它放了吧
[43:20] [Tim] Go on, girl. 走吧 姑娘 走吧
[43:22] – [Charlie] Good. – [Jeremy] Come on Deeny, in you go. 走吧 迪尼 进去 你会喜欢的
[43:24] You like it in there.
[43:25] [Jeremy] So, my beef supply was now up and running… 所以 我的牛肉供应计划 现在已经启动 开始运作了
[43:29] [Dilwyn] Two heifers potentially pregnant. – 有两头母牛可能怀孕 – 谢谢
[43:31] [Charlie] Thank you very much.
[43:33] [cockerel crowing] [Jeremy] …the eggs were coming thick and fast… 鸡蛋越来越多 下得越来越快
[43:36] [Jeremy] It’s a good haul this morning. 今天早上的收成不错
[43:40] [Jeremy] …and the chili chutney was in production. 辣椒酸辣酱也正在生产中
[43:43] 死神辣椒
[43:44] So things were looking good 新的生态友好餐厅看起来前景不错
[43:46] for my new low-miles, eco-friendly restaurant.
[43:51] All I had to do now was win over the locals. 我现在只需要赢得当地人的支持
[43:56] Didley Squat sponsors Chadlington Football Club. 下一集
[43:58] 迪丽斯库阿特 赞助查德灵顿足球俱乐部
[44:00] It’s a small village and I just thought rather than have them all gossiping, 这是个小村庄
[44:02] 我想与其让流言飞起 不如来解释一下我们正在做的事
[44:04] I’d go down and explain what we’re doing.
[44:06] [man] You described us as morons. 你说我们是白痴
[44:08] You said “Every village has one moron, I have six.” 你说每个村子都有一个白痴 而我有六个
[44:11] [laughter]
[44:12] [theme music playing]
[44:44] 创意监督 杨婕
克拉克森的农场

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