时间 英文 中文 [00:09] To the airport! 去机场 [00:10] Your period stain. 你的大姨妈斑痕 [00:11] I have weed in my vaginé. 我阴道里有大麻 [00:13] Period pants are the ultimate decoy. 姨妈裤是终极掩护 [00:14] We’ll have to check your luggage. 我们必须托运你们的行李 [00:16] This bag is the bomb. 这个箱子很酷 [00:17] This is gonna have to go under the plane. 这个必须得托运…
时间 英文 中文 [00:08] Dude, I really need to zen out. 姐们儿 我真的需要静一静 [00:10] A bird flew into my mouth this morning. 今早一只鸟飞进了我的嘴 [00:13] – Eww, again? – I don’t know what’s going on. -又来一次 -我不知道怎么了 [00:15] Well, what could be more zen than yoga that’s suggested donation– free. 还有什么能比建议捐赠费设为免费的瑜伽让人冷静 [00:20] You catch that, suggested…
时间 英文 中文 [00:06] I still can’t believe you have to take a drug test. 我还是无法相信你得去做药检 [00:09] I know. The man gets off sniffing America’s piss these days. 我知道 那男的现在都靠闻尿来寻求快感 [00:13] You know that my pee probably won’t pass a drug test either? 你知道我的尿多半也过不了药检 [00:16] I know, but at least it’s, like, human level. 我知道…
时间 英文 中文 [00:02] So Jaime’s visiting his daddy this weekend. 海眉这周末要去看他爸 [00:04] In Guatemala? 去危地马拉吗 [00:05] Not his bio father, his daddi with an “I”. 不是他的生物学父亲 是他的”干爹” [00:07] Oh, cool. 好吧 [00:08] Which means, I have the place to myself. 也就是说家里只有我一人 [00:11] Ilana, I’m not doing another séance. 阿拉娜 我不想再来一次降神会了 [00:12] It’s like, weird…
时间 英文 中文 [00:47] – Cute. – So? -可爱 -感觉怎样 [00:49] Welcome to Wayne. This is it. 欢迎来到韦恩镇 就是这了 [00:52] If I were just 30 years younger. 要是我能年轻三十岁 [00:55] Dad, then what? 爸 然后呢 [00:57] Then we’d be best friends and hang out all the time. 然后我们就能做闺蜜 随时一起玩 [01:00] Get your head outta the gutter….
时间 英文 中文 [00:03] Okay, so how many do we have so far? 目前为止我们写了多少了 [00:05] We’re at 59. 59条 [00:08] Okay. 好的 [00:08] 60 Brrrr– 60. [00:10] A gif basket. 动图篮子 [00:12] It’s an app that stores .Gifs in your phone 这个APP能在你的手机里储存动图 [00:15] so that when you send a text, 所以当你发短信的时候 [00:16] you can send…
时间 英文 中文 [00:12] Abbi? 艾比 [00:14] Rat bastard! 鼠杂碎 [00:22] Get out! You’re ruining my life! 滚出去 你毁了我的生活 [00:34] This is some of my best sandwich work to date. 这是迄今为止我最得意的三明治 [00:43] No, no-no-no. 不 不 不 不 [00:45] Rata hijueputa. 混蛋老鼠 [00:49] Kinda sexy. 有点性感呢 [01:07] Weed thief! 偷麻贼 [01:18] That rat won’t be…
时间 英文 中文 [00:03] And we’re going forward. 向前 [00:04] Two, three, four. 二 三 四 [00:06] And let’s reverse it. 反过来 [00:07] Two, three, four, that’s great. 二 三 四 非常好 [00:10] Whoa, are we DJs right now? 我们是DJ吗 [00:11] What are we doing? I don’t know. 我们在干什么 我也不知道 [00:14] – This is hard,…
时间 英文 中文 [00:02] Oh, I guarantee I can 我保证我能 [00:04] identify my own butthole in a line up. 100%. 在屁眼识别中识别出我的屁眼 绝对的 [00:06] – Even if it’s just a close up line up of buttholes? – Yeah. -即使是特写镜头的屁眼识别吗 -对 [00:09] – No way, dude. Come on. – Completely, I can identify yours. -不可能 姐们儿 拜托…
时间 英文 中文 [00:25] My God… 天啊 [01:16] What the fuck, Bevers? 搞什么 贝弗斯 [01:17] I’m sorry. 抱歉 [01:49] Abbo, party of two. 艾波 二人桌 [01:52] Abbo. 艾波 [01:54] Oh, sorry. Do you mean “Abbi?” 不好意思 你是想说艾比吗 [01:57] Your table’s almost ready. 你们的餐桌就快准备好了 [01:58] But we can’t seat you unless you’re all together. 但是除非你们两人都在否则我们不能安排你们入座 [02:00]…