| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | [church organ playing] | |
| [00:05] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [00:07] | Look at Aunt Eva. | 快看Eva姨妈 |
| [00:09] | That hat is awful. | 帽子真是丑得无法无天 |
| [00:10] | Mm. | 嗯 |
| [00:12] | And the crying, Jesus. | -还有那哭声 受不了 -你信吗 |
| [00:14] | Are you buying it? | |
| [00:16] | I’m on the fence. | 纠结中 |
| [00:18] | She did take acting lessons. | -她有上过表演课就是了 -跟谁学的 |
| [00:19] | Yeah, from who? | |
| [00:25] | Move it along, Jack. You didn’t even like him. | 退下吧 Jack 你根本不喜欢他 |
| [00:28] | Dad owed him money. | 爸爸欠他钱 |
| [00:30] | – How much? ‐ $14. | -多少 -14 |
| [00:32] | He sent me some cryptic invoice in the mail. | 他在邮件里给我发了一些加了密的发票 |
| [00:36] | Did you pay it? | 你有给钱吗 |
| [00:38] | No. | 没 |
| [00:40] | He’ll get his money’s worth at the buffet later. | 待会儿的自助餐上他就能吃回来 |
| [00:41] | Is he going for the cuff links? | 他是想拿走袖扣 吗 |
| [00:44] | I had ’em glued on. | 我用胶水粘好了的 |
| [00:48] | Mom’s turn. | 该老妈了 |
| [00:50] | [sighs] | |
| [00:52] | This will be interesting. | 应该会很有趣 |
| [00:54] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [01:00] | And didn’t even try. | 竟然都没假装难过 |
| [01:02] | I actually respect that. | 我倒是很敬佩这点 |
| [01:04] | When’s the last time you spoke? | 你们上次说话是什么时候了 |
| [01:06] | We e‐mailed in June. | 六月的时候有发过邮件 |
| [01:08] | ‐ Unbelievable. ‐ Thank you. | ‐ 难以置信 ‐ 谢谢 |
| [01:11] | Please never do that to me. | 以后请别这么对我 |
| [01:12] | Fine. | 好 |
| [01:14] | Oh, honey, he was so blessed | 亲爱的 老天眷顾他才有你们这么优秀的孩子 |
| [01:16] | to have kids like you. | |
| [01:18] | You know he’s smiling down on you from heaven. | 他现在正从天堂对你们微笑 |
| [01:22] | That is so kind. | 真好 |
| [01:25] | If he’s smiling, it’s ’cause he’s looking down her shirt. | 如果他在微笑 一定是因为他在看她的胸口 |
| [01:28] | Why are all old people obsessed with heaven? | 为什么老年人总是对天堂着迷 |
| [01:32] | If all they have left to look forward to. | 他们只剩天堂可盼了 |
| [01:34] | Come on, let’s get this over with. | 来吧 尽早结束这事 |
| [01:37] | [organ music continues] | |
| [01:40] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [01:44] | Are those all his girlfriends? | 那些都是他女友吗 |
| [01:46] | Just the latest bunch. | 只是最近的一些 |
| [01:48] | Mm. Surprisingly well‐behaved. | 嗯 没想到举止都很得体 |
| [01:50] | They think they’re in the will? | 她们以为她们都在遗嘱里吗 |
| [01:52] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [01:57] | He looks bloated. | 他看上去好臃肿 |
| [01:58] | Not enough embalming fluid. | 尸体防腐剂不够 |
| [02:01] | How did they fuck that up? | 他们怎么会把这个搞砸 |
| [02:02] | I mean, this is how people will remember him. | 这可是大家最后一次看到他啊 |
| [02:07] | He’ll be forgotten in a week. | 一周内就会被所有人遗忘的 |
| [02:12] | Do you hear that? | 你们听到了吗 |
| [02:15] | [organ swells] | |
| [02:18] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [02:26] | Sonny boy. | 小家伙 |
| [02:28] | How’s about a beer for you old man? | 给我来瓶啤酒 |
| [02:30] | [sharp inhale] | |
| [02:34] | (female) Did you have a bad dream? | 你做噩梦了吗 |
| [02:36] | [exhale] | |
| [02:37] | Only that I woke up and you were gone. | 我梦到我醒来时你已不在 |
| [02:40] | [snickers] You did not. | 才没有吧 |
| [02:44] | You’re right, my real dream was much worse. | 你说得对 我真正的梦糟多了 |
| [02:49] | [exhales] I had fun tonight. | 今晚玩得很开心 |
| [02:54] | Me too. | 我也是 |
| [02:56] | Let’s go out again. | 我们出去再疯一把吧 |
| [02:59] | Nothing’s open this late. | 这个点都关门了 |
| [03:01] | Go back to sleep, babe. | 继续睡觉吧 宝贝 |
| [03:03] | [kisses] | |
| [03:10] | [water churning] | |
| [03:30] | [soft instrumental music] | |
| [03:33] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [03:59] | [exhales] | |
| [04:24] | Walk of shame. | 羞耻逃逸 |
| [04:27] | I offered her a t‐shirt. | 我给了她一件T恤 |
| [04:29] | You could have offered her a ride. | 你该送她一程的 |
| [04:31] | Please. I got her an Uber. | 拜托 我有帮她叫优步 |
| [04:32] | What a gentleman. | 真绅士 |
| [04:34] | Speaking of gentlemen. | 说到绅士 |
| [04:37] | Should I make another omelet? | 我要再做一个鸡蛋卷吗 |
| [04:38] | He slipped out discretely. | 他已经悄悄溜走了 |
| [04:41] | Nicely done. | 不错哦 |
| [04:44] | Come on, Laura. | 走吧 Laura |
| [04:45] | How you feeling? | 怎么样啊 |
| [04:47] | Fine, you don’t have to ask me that every morning. | 很好 你不用每天早上都问我这个 |
| [04:49] | I’m excited about tonight. | 我对今晚有点小激动呢 |
| [04:51] | I know you are. | 我知道 |
| [05:00] | [sighs] | |
| [05:05] | It’s hard for me to describe. | 不知道该怎么形容 |
| [05:08] | It’s something kind of fucked‐up. | 就是很操蛋的感觉 |
| [05:10] | Good. That’s my specialty. | 很好 这是我的专长 |
| [05:13] | It’s just‐‐ I’ve been dreaming | 我最近总是梦到我在上我爸 |
| [05:16] | about fucking my dad. | |
| [05:19] | Er, my dad fucking me, technically. | 准确说应该是他上我 |
| [05:22] | Mm, that’s quite an image | 十足的画面感啊 |
| [05:25] | to wake up from. | |
| [05:27] | How has communication been with your father? | 你和你父亲交流得怎么样 |
| [05:30] | Whoa, I don’t want to fuck my dad! | 我不想上我爸 |
| [05:33] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [05:35] | I mean… | 我是说 |
| [05:38] | Do I wanna fuck my dad? | 我想上我爸吗 |
| [05:40] | I don’t know, Tom. Do you? | 我不知道 Tom 你想吗 |
| [05:44] | No. | 不想 |
| [05:45] | Well, I think you have your answer. | 这就是你要的答案 |
| [05:49] | Am I gay then? Is that what it means? | 那我是同性恋吗 这个梦的意思是这个 |
| [05:52] | Are you attracted to men? | 你喜欢男人吗 |
| [05:56] | No. | 不 |
| [05:58] | Well, then you’re probably not gay. | 那你多半不是同性恋 |
| [06:01] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [06:04] | Then what the fuck? | 那到底是怎么回事 |
| [06:05] | Exactly, what the fuck. | 问得好 怎么回事 |
| [06:08] | Just the same question we’ve been asking our dreams | 从古埃及时期我们就开始 |
| [06:10] | since… ancient Egyptians, really. | 问这样的问题了 |
| [06:14] | Uh, you know, Freud believes that‐‐ | 你知道 弗洛伊德认为 |
| [06:16] | Look, I know your job is to be abstract, | 我知道你的工作就是要抽象 |
| [06:18] | but I need something more concrete. | 但我需要一些具体的答案 |
| [06:20] | Can you please just tell me what my dream means? | 你能告诉我我的梦到底是什么意思吗 |
| [06:26] | [sighs] All right, Tom, | 好吧 Tom |
| [06:28] | many people struggle with the concept of wanting | 很多人为了让父母骄傲 |
| [06:31] | to make their parents proud, it’s genetic from birth. | 绞尽脑汁 这是与生俱来的 |
| [06:34] | We need their affection and their approval | 我们需要他们的关爱和赞扬 |
| [06:36] | in order to survive. | 才能生存 |
| [06:39] | So, your unconscious has found a very colorful way | 你的意识让你发现了一个充满想象力的 |
| [06:42] | of painting one of the oldest ones in the book. | 做出最古老行为之一的方式 |
| [06:49] | You want to please your father. | 你想取悦你父亲 |
| [06:55] | [chuckles] | |
| [07:00] | If anyone calls, uh, just say I’m in a session. | 有人打电话的话就说我在会诊 |
| [07:02] | Will do. | 好的 |
| [07:05] | You ever online date? | 你有试过网上约会吗 |
| [07:07] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [07:09] | Um, do you do any prep, or just go in blind, or‐‐ | 你会做准备工作吗 还是直接赴约 或者 |
| [07:13] | I do my research. I don’t have a death wish. | 我会做调查 我可不想死 |
| [07:15] | So, you mean on Facebook? | 你是说看脸书吗 |
| [07:18] | Yes, on Facebook and Instagram, Twitter, Linkedin, Vine, LuLu, | 对 脸书 Instagram 推特 领英 Vine Lulu |
| [07:22] | Match, OkCupid‐‐ | |
| [07:24] | Oh, God. | 天啊 |
| [07:25] | You didn’t look him up? | 你没搜索他吗 |
| [07:27] | What if he’s awful like a serial killer. | 万一他是个连环杀手呢 |
| [07:30] | [whispers] Or Armenian. | 或者亚美尼亚人 |
| [07:32] | Oh, I wanna study you. | 我想研究你 |
| [07:34] | People always say that. | 大家总这么说 |
| [07:35] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [07:38] | How do I look? | 我看上去怎么样 |
| [07:40] | ‐ Honestly. ‐ Uh, yeah. | -实话吗 -嗯 |
| [07:42] | If doesn’t fuck you, I will, | 如果他不上你 我上 |
| [07:44] | and you don’t even have to buy me dinner. | 都不需要你请我吃晚餐 |
| [07:45] | Thanks, Leia. | 谢谢 Leia |
| [07:47] | I won’t go down on you, though. I did that once to a girlfriend | 但我不会舔你下面 我和我女友做过一次 |
| [07:49] | in college and got bronchitis, so it would have to be | 在大学里 结果得了支气管炎 所以只能用 |
| [07:51] | like a strap‐on situation or like scissors. | 捆绑式假阴茎或者阴道互搓 |
| [07:56] | Okay. | 知道了 |
| [07:59] | Two very good options. | 两个很不错的选择 |
| [08:04] | Can you at least tell me what we matched on? | 至少给我说下我和他有哪些地方相配吧 |
| [08:07] | I constructed your profile to maximize compatibility. | 我把你资料的适配度调成了最大 |
| [08:10] | So, pictures, interests, personal info. | 照片 兴趣 个人信息 |
| [08:13] | To the men of snooger.com, you are the ideal | 对所有snooger.com上的男人来说 |
| [08:15] | 36‐year‐old woman. | 你就是个理想的36岁女人 |
| [08:17] | I am 39. | 我39岁 |
| [08:19] | You’ll figure that out. | 你会知道该怎么做的 |
| [08:20] | [distant rock music] | |
| [08:23] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [08:28] | ‐ What? ‐ Your mom is still here. | -怎么了 -你妈还在这 |
| [08:30] | So. | 所以呢 |
| [08:32] | Your uncle was watching us in the hot tub. | 我们在热水浴池里的时候你舅舅有看到 |
| [08:34] | I seriously doubt that. | 怎么可能 |
| [08:36] | I saw him looking through the window. | 我看到他在窗户那里看 |
| [08:37] | ‐ It was creepy. ‐ Who cares? | -吓死了 -这有什么 |
| [08:39] | It’s just weird, you all living in this house together. | 总之很奇怪 你们都住在一起 |
| [08:42] | It’s not weird. He and my mom are best friends, | 一点都不奇怪 他和我妈是最好的朋友 |
| [08:45] | and he’s really depressed. | 而且他很消沉 |
| [08:47] | Seems all right. | 看上去挺正常的啊 |
| [08:49] | Exactly, he tries to hide it, | 是的 他在掩饰 |
| [08:50] | but I’ve seen his medicine cabinet. | 但我有看他的医药箱 |
| [08:53] | Look, do you want to have sex or not? | 你到底想不想做啊 |
| [08:58] | [knocking] Come in. | 进来 |
| [09:00] | Wait. | 等等 |
| [09:02] | Uh, we’re um, uh, we’re heading out. | 我们准备出门 |
| [09:05] | Okay. | 嗯 |
| [09:06] | So, call if you need anything. | 有事打电话 |
| [09:08] | ‐ Okay. ‐ And don’t mess with the DVR. | -嗯 -不要乱动DVR |
| [09:09] | I’m recording an episode of Man vs. Food. | 我在录《挑战美食堂》 |
| [09:11] | Okay. | 嗯 |
| [09:13] | Emile. | |
| [09:14] | Alex. | |
| [09:22] | Why were you watching them? | 你为什么偷看他们 |
| [09:23] | They woke me up. | 他们把我吵醒了 |
| [09:25] | I just wanted to make sure you knew. | 我只想确保你也知情 |
| [09:27] | I’ve had her on the pill since she was 12. | 从她12岁起我就开始给她吃药了 |
| [09:29] | I buy her condoms. | 我给她买避孕套 |
| [09:31] | Magnums, I hope. | 最好是大号的 |
| [09:32] | ‐ Really? ‐ Oh, yeah. | -没开玩笑吧 -是的 |
| [09:34] | Huh, it’s never the ones you expect. | 和预想的总是不一样 |
| [09:37] | It’s like a soda can. | 有汽水罐那么大 |
| [09:39] | What are you jealous? | 你眼红了吗 |
| [09:40] | Of course, you want me to drive? | 当然 你想我开车吗 |
| [09:43] | Uh, no, I don’t mind. | 不 我可以开 |
| [09:45] | If I drive, you can drink more. | 我开的话 你可以喝更多 |
| [09:46] | Alcohol’s a proven libido strengthener. | 酒精被证明是性欲增强利器 |
| [09:49] | [soft instrumental music] | |
| [09:52] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [10:08] | ‐ You all right? ‐ Yes. | -你还好吧 -是的 |
| [10:11] | [lounge music] | |
| [10:15] | [sighs] Is that him? | 是他吗 |
| [10:25] | Valerie? | |
| [10:26] | ‐ Ian. ‐ Wow. | |
| [10:28] | ‐ Hi. ‐ You’re really hot. | -你好 -你很性感 |
| [10:30] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [10:32] | I thought be based on your pictures, | 看你照片我就想到了 |
| [10:33] | but you never know. | 不过你总是不知道会遇到什么 |
| [10:34] | Oh, well. | 好吧 |
| [10:36] | Some women have this weird obsession | 有的女人总想修复好一切 |
| [10:38] | with trying to fix every little thing | 结果却不怎么样 |
| [10:40] | and it just looks bad. | |
| [10:42] | Yes, I totally agree with that. | 是的 十分赞同 |
| [10:46] | And then here you are. | 而你 |
| [10:48] | Aging naturally and embracing it. | 自然变老 毫不抵触 |
| [10:50] | So refreshing. | 让人耳目一新 |
| [10:52] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [10:54] | Hey, do you like scotch? | 你喜欢苏格兰威士忌吗 |
| [10:56] | Um, not‐‐not really. You? | 不怎么喜欢 你呢 |
| [11:00] | My dad used to put a shot in my milk bottle every night | 我爸以前总是在我睡觉前往奶瓶里倒一杯 |
| [11:01] | before bed. | |
| [11:03] | Oh, sounds like child abuse. | 像是虐待儿童 |
| [11:05] | [laughs] | |
| [11:07] | Is our a table ready? | 我们的桌子准备好了吗 |
| [11:09] | We have a risotto with asparagus and morels | 我们有配有白松露切片的 |
| [11:10] | toped with shaved white truffles | 意大利芦笋龙葵烩饭 |
| [11:12] | and lastly a Wild Alaskan Cod | 以及用柠檬黄油烹制的 |
| [11:14] | cooked in lemon butter and cooked over rice pilaf. | 野生阿拉斯加鳕鱼配印度香料饭 |
| [11:16] | I believe we have two left if you’re interested. | 我们还剩两份 如果你们感兴趣的话 |
| [11:18] | ‐ Ooh, I want that. ‐ Very good. | -我想要 -很好 |
| [11:20] | Oh, but I’ll have the bacon burger, | 但我还是吃全熟不加面包的培根汉堡好了 |
| [11:21] | well done, no bun. | |
| [11:22] | And for you, sir? | 先生你呢 |
| [11:24] | I’ll try the cod. | 我要鳕鱼 |
| [11:28] | ‐ What was that about? ‐ What? | -刚才怎么回事 -什么 |
| [11:30] | Why didn’t you get the cod? | 为什么不要鳕鱼 |
| [11:32] | Oh, I’m Paleo. It’s why I’m drinking water. | 我是原始人饮食法 所以我才喝水 |
| [11:35] | ‐ Ah. ‐ I only consume foods | 我只吃在旧石器时代存在的食物 |
| [11:36] | that were available during the Paleolithic Era. | |
| [11:39] | They didn’t have cod during the Paleolithic Era? | 旧石器时代没有鳕鱼吗 |
| [11:41] | Not with lemon butter. | 没有配了柠檬黄油的 |
| [11:42] | Oh. | |
| [11:45] | It’s healthier. | 这样更健康 |
| [11:46] | A hamburger with bacon? | 培根汉堡 |
| [11:48] | Yeah. It’s the bun that’s bad for you. | 是的 对身体不好的是面包 |
| [11:49] | Pretty sure that’s not true, but okay. | 我很确定这是错的 不过你开心就好 |
| [11:52] | Cave men, they didn’t eat any processed grains or sugar | 洞穴人 他们不吃加工谷物和糖 |
| [11:55] | and they lived much longer, healthier lives than us. | 他们能活得更久更健康 |
| [11:58] | [laughs] Again, I’m pretty sure | 同样 我很确定 |
| [12:00] | that’s not true, but I’m happy | 这是错的 但我就 |
| [12:02] | to move forward without an argument. | 不和你争了 |
| [12:04] | It’s scientific. Like, they’ve done studies. | -这是有科学依据的 -他们有研究过 |
| [12:06] | A guys told me about it at Cross‐Fit. | 一个在全面强健课上的男生给我说的 |
| [12:12] | We lasted 16 years, raised a daughter together | 我们的婚姻持续了16年 一起抚养一个女儿 |
| [12:15] | and then, a month ago, he left me for a younger woman. | 一个月前 他为了一个年轻女人而离开了 |
| [12:20] | That sucks. | 真糟糕 |
| [12:22] | I mean, we have some problems, but I thought we’d deal with it | 我们之间虽然有问题 但是我想等到Laura |
| [12:24] | when off to college, but I guess he couldn’t wait. | 上大学后再解决 但他应该是等不及了 |
| [12:27] | Yeah, I was married, too. | 我也结过婚 |
| [12:29] | Wish someone would have warned me. | 真希望当时有人能警告我 |
| [12:31] | Oh, what happened? | 发生什么了 |
| [12:34] | ‐ It didn’t work out. ‐ I’m sorry. | -没法处下去 -很遗憾 |
| [12:37] | It’s hard, isn’t it? | 很艰难 是不是 |
| [12:39] | Yeah, but I try to focus on what’s working. | 是的 但我尝试把注意力放在积极的地方 |
| [12:44] | 43 as a guy, that’s the sweet spot | 一个43岁男人 这是约会的 |
| [12:47] | for dating. | 最佳年龄 |
| [12:49] | It’s a positive way of looking at it. | 这样想也不错 |
| [12:52] | And everybody’s in line‐‐ 20s, 30s, 40s. | 网上各种人群 20多岁的 30多岁的 40多岁的 |
| [12:54] | It’s almost too easy. | 不要太容易 |
| [12:56] | So many options you have. | 你选择很多 |
| [12:58] | So many options. | 是的 |
| [13:02] | Oh, yeah, it’s amazing. | 是啊 非常棒 |
| [13:03] | Online dating. | 网上约会 |
| [13:05] | You answer a couple questions, the computer does its thing. | 你只需回答几个问题 剩下的交给电脑 |
| [13:06] | and now here we are. | 然后就见面 |
| [13:08] | So, you’re a trainer? | 所以你是教练吗 |
| [13:10] | Master Fitness Instructor. | 健身指导硕士 |
| [13:12] | ‐ Sorry. ‐ That’s okay. | -抱歉 -没事 |
| [13:14] | Just kind of my pet peeve, you know? | 我的怪毛病之一 |
| [13:16] | It’s like when someone calls a doctor “mister.” | 就像有人叫医生“先生”一样 |
| [13:21] | So, what kind of classes does one take to get a degree | 所以要上什么课才能获得健身指导的学位 |
| [13:22] | in fitness instruction. | |
| [13:24] | I don’t know. I was a communications major. | 不知道 我主修传媒 |
| [13:29] | I’ve been thinking about working out more, | 我一直想更多地运动 |
| [13:30] | but I don’t know. | 但我不知道 |
| [13:32] | I think going to the gym give me PTSD. | 我觉得去健身房会让我患上创伤后应激障碍 |
| [13:35] | My dad has PTSD. | 我爸就有创伤后应激障碍 |
| [13:38] | He was in the war. | 他参加了战争 |
| [13:41] | That’s cool. Must have been fun | 酷 去见识外面的世界一定很有趣吧 |
| [13:42] | to see the world. | |
| [13:46] | So, what do you do with you spare time. | 你业余时间都干些什么 |
| [13:51] | Started a website that’s kinda taking off, | 我刚创立了一个网站 |
| [13:53] | so I do that. | 这是之一 |
| [13:55] | Mostly I just hang out. | 大多数时候我就是在外面逛 |
| [13:56] | What’s the site? | 什么网站 |
| [13:58] | Snooter.com. | |
| [14:00] | ‐ The site that set us up? ‐ Bingo. | -那个给我们牵线的网站 -正是 |
| [14:03] | You use your own dating site. | 你使用自己的约会网站 |
| [14:05] | I wrote the matching algorithm. | 配对运算法则就是我写的 |
| [14:07] | And does that algorithm match you with any girl | 这个法则会把你和你喜欢的女生配对吗 |
| [14:08] | you find attractive. | |
| [14:10] | Pretty much. | 差不多吧 |
| [14:12] | So, you set us up. | 那就是你把我俩配对的咯 |
| [14:14] | Me, the site‐‐ it’s all the same really. | 我 网站 没什么区别 |
| [14:16] | Excuse me for just one second. | 失陪一下 |
| [14:27] | What’s up? | 怎么了 |
| [14:29] | His favorite movie is Underworld. | 他最喜欢的电影是《黑夜传说》 |
| [14:30] | With Kevin Costner? | 凯文.科斯特纳演的那个 |
| [14:31] | No, that’s Waterworld. | 那是《未来水世界》 |
| [14:33] | Which would be a step up from Underworld. | 比《黑夜传说》高端多了 |
| [14:35] | He gets great ratings. Women rave about him. | 他评分挺高的 女人都喜欢他 |
| [14:37] | Well, the women on you website are subhuman. | 你网站上的女人都是低级人 |
| [14:39] | That’s mean. And mostly not true. | 嘴真毒 而且不怎么准确 |
| [14:42] | How’s yours going? | 你约会进行得如何了 |
| [14:43] | She’s a fitness freak. I hate her. | 她是个健身狂 我讨厌她 |
| [14:46] | We should go. | 我们该走了 |
| [14:47] | I think I’m going to try to take her home. | 我打算带她回家 |
| [14:49] | Why? | 为什么 |
| [14:50] | Well, the sex will suck and she won’t call, | 做爱会很不顺 她就不会再找我 |
| [14:52] | and the it’ll be on her for not putting in more effort. | 那样到时不努力推进我们的关系就是她的错 |
| [14:54] | ‐ Jesus. ‐ You should try it. | -天啊 -你也该试试 |
| [14:56] | I am not gonna sleep with that guy, okay? | 我才不会和那男的做 |
| [14:58] | He smells like college. | 一股大麻味 |
| [14:59] | Hi! | 嗨 |
| [15:03] | ‐ Is everything all right? ‐ Yeah. | -一切都好吗 -是的 |
| [15:04] | We were just finishing up. | 我们正要出去 |
| [15:06] | This is Alex. This is my brother. | 这是Alex 我弟弟 |
| [15:09] | Sup? | 你好 |
| [15:10] | Why is your brother here? | 你弟弟怎么会在这 |
| [15:12] | ‐ Um. ‐ I’m on a date. | 我在约会 |
| [15:14] | Do you always date at the same restaurants. | 你们总是在同一家餐厅约会吗 |
| [15:15] | ‐ Starting to, kind of. ‐ No, no, no. | -有这个趋势 算是吧 -不是 |
| [15:17] | Wow, and then you go in the back and say hurtful things | 然后你们到后面说你们约会对象的坏话 |
| [15:20] | about the people you’re with. | |
| [15:22] | I think you’re reading too much into it. | 我觉得你过度解读了 |
| [15:24] | ‐ No. ‐ Yeah, I use Old Spice. | 我用老香料 |
| [15:26] | It’s a popular deodorant and I like the smell. | 很流行的除臭剂 我喜欢它的味道 |
| [15:28] | Hey, uh, sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt. | 抱歉 不是故意来打断你们的 |
| [15:32] | Are you his date? | 你和他在约会吗 |
| [15:33] | Yeah. | 是的 |
| [15:34] | Kay, that’s his sister | 那是他姐姐 |
| [15:36] | and they were shit‐talking us back here. | 他们在这说我们坏话 |
| [15:38] | What? | 什么 |
| [15:41] | Yeah, he said I smell bad and he said | 她说我有体臭 他说 |
| [15:42] | you’re a fitness freak. | 你是健身狂 |
| [15:44] | Caring about your body isn’t something to be ashamed of. | 关爱身体并不是什么可耻的事 |
| [15:46] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [15:48] | Were you two hooked up on Snooger? | 你们是在Snooger上认识的吗 |
| [15:49] | Yeah. | 是的 |
| [15:50] | Yeah, you’re probably not compatible. | 你们多半并不匹配 |
| [15:52] | ‐ He rigged the algorithm. ‐ I wrote the algorithm. | -他篡改了运算法则 -我写的 |
| [15:54] | ‐ That’s really dishonest. ‐ Online dating is dishonest. | -真不可靠 -网上约会本来就不可靠 |
| [15:56] | You put up you best pictures and personality traits. | 你放上你最好看的照片和个人特色 |
| [15:58] | You lie about how much money you make, | 你们的经济状况 |
| [16:00] | how many partners you’ve had‐‐ I’ve seen both your profiles. | 交过多少对象都是假的 你们两个的资料我都看过 |
| [16:02] | They’re filled with lies. | 充斥着谎言 |
| [16:04] | Do you like scotch? | 你喜欢苏格兰威士忌吗 |
| [16:05] | I would drink anything right now. | 我现在什么都愿意喝 |
| [16:06] | See, even your caveman diet’s a lie. | 看吧 你的原始人饮食法都是假的 |
| [16:08] | Fuck you. | 去死吧 |
| [16:13] | ‐ Fine, we can leave. ‐ Thank you. | -好的 我们可以走了 -谢谢 |
| [16:20] | [alternative music playing] | |
| [16:25] | [knocking] | |
| [16:27] | ‐ Hey. ‐ Hi. | -嘿 -嗨 |
| [16:29] | How’d it go? | 约会如何 |
| [16:31] | Uh, not great. | 不怎么样 |
| [16:34] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [16:36] | Is Emile gone? | Emile走了吗 |
| [16:38] | Yeah. | 嗯 |
| [16:42] | Uh, Alex saw you in the hot tub. | Alex看到你们在热水浴池了 |
| [16:46] | Oh. | |
| [16:48] | You know, I give you a lot of freedom | 我给了你很多自由 |
| [16:50] | because I trust you to act like an adult. | 因为我相信你能像成年人一样懂事 |
| [16:53] | Please don’t make me regret that. | 请不要让我后悔 |
| [16:58] | So, you didn’t bring him back then? | 所以你没把他带回来 |
| [17:01] | ‐ No. ‐ Oh. | 没 |
| [17:04] | Thought you wanted to borrow a condom. | 还以为你是想借避孕套的 |
| [17:14] | ‐ Good night. ‐ Night. | -晚安 -安 |
| [17:22] | We’re at a funeral‐‐ Dad’s funeral. | 我们在老爸的葬礼上 |
| [17:25] | ‐ Am I there? ‐ Oh, yeah. | -我在吗 -在 |
| [17:27] | Whole family’s there and his harem. | 全家人都在 还有他的后宫 |
| [17:30] | Mm, typical. | 很有他的风范 |
| [17:33] | What are we doing. | 我们在干什么 |
| [17:35] | Just shitting all over everybody. | 说所有人的坏话 |
| [17:38] | Criticizing Aunt Eva, cousin Jane. | 批判姨妈Eva 堂妹Jane |
| [17:41] | See, that seems inappropriate, even for us. | 即使对于我们 这也不太合适 |
| [17:43] | Normally, I’d agree with you, but everyone’s so awful, | 通常情况下 我会同意你 但他们实在太可恶了 |
| [17:46] | it’s impossible not to. | 不说他们坏话都不行 |
| [17:51] | Even in my dreams, I don’t relate to people. | 即使在我梦里 我也不擅长与人相处 |
| [17:57] | Maybe if you stopped having short, meaningless | 也许你该停止开展那些短暂又无意义的关系 |
| [17:59] | relationships. | |
| [18:03] | And have one long meaningless relationship? | 所以要开展长久又无意义的关系吗 |
| [18:06] | ‐ Ugh! [laughs] | |
| [18:08] | My marriage was not meaningless. | 我的婚姻不是无意义的 |
| [18:14] | Oh, God, tonight was a disaster. | 天 今晚真是灾难 |
| [18:18] | I can set another one for tomorrow. | 我可以帮你明天再约一个 |
| [18:20] | No, no. I don’t know. | 别 别 我不知道 |
| [18:24] | Maybe I’m not ready. | 也许我还没准备好 |
| [18:26] | I mean, the whole night, I just kept picturing | 整个晚上 我一直在想象 |
| [18:28] | Drew in that restaurant watching me with that idiot | Drew再餐厅里 看着我和那傻逼 |
| [18:31] | and laughing. | 然后大笑 |
| [18:32] | Yeah, well he wouldn’t be laughing if you’d taken | 你要是把那傻逼带回家上了他就不会笑了 |
| [18:34] | that idiot home and fucked him. | |
| [18:36] | You make an awful therapist. | 你会是个很差的咨询师 |
| [18:38] | I’m serious. | 我是认真的 |
| [18:39] | You want to stop thinking about Drew? | 你想不再想Drew吗 |
| [18:41] | ‐ Yes. ‐ Go be with somebody. | -嗯 -那就找个对象 |
| [18:44] | [sighs] | |
| [18:47] | I don’t know if I can. | 我不知道我行不行 |
| [18:54] | (female) Why are you looking so smug? | 你怎么一脸得意的样子 |
| [18:56] | You think Northwestern will take a 14‐10? | 你觉得西北大学会要一个14-10的吗 |
| [18:58] | No, the won’t because you extra curriculars | 不会的 因为你课外学分最多就是普通 |
| [19:01] | are fucking average at best. | |
| [19:03] | Come on, we’re gonna be late for your tutors. | 快点 和你导师的见面要迟到了 |
| [19:05] | ‐ Good game. ‐ I didn’t even play. | -比赛不错 -我根本没上场 |
| [19:07] | I hate team sports. I’m just doing it | 我讨厌集体项目 我参加只是 |
| [19:09] | for the P.E. credit. | 为了体育学分 |
| [19:13] | Who’s that? | 那是谁 |
| [19:15] | Molly Hartsler. | |
| [19:17] | She’s a total whack job. | 神经病一个 |
| [19:18] | I can tell. | 可以看出来 |
| [19:20] | Yeah, her husband killed himself last year. | 她老公去年自杀了 |
| [19:22] | That makes sense. | 说得通 |
| [19:24] | You tried to kill yourself, didn’t you? | 你也尝试过自杀 是不是 |
| [19:26] | Debatable. | 有待争论 |
| [19:28] | My mom said you jumped off your deck. | 我妈说你从平台调下 |
| [19:30] | I did, but it was more exploratory than anything. | 是的 不过那就是冒险 |
| [19:33] | Only broke my leg. | 骨折了而已 |
| [19:36] | If you were serious, you would have used a gun. | 你要真想自杀的话 你会用枪的 |
| [19:38] | Exactly. | 是啊 |
| [19:41] | [engine starts] | |
| [19:42] | I’m sorry about the other night with Emile. | 我很抱歉关于之前我和Emile那事 |
| [19:46] | [laughs] | |
| [19:47] | What? | 怎么 |
| [19:51] | Oh, and Drew wants the cars. | Drew想要车 |
| [19:54] | Valerie doesn’t care about the cars. | Valerie对车不感兴趣 |
| [19:56] | Nice, easy, so, if everything else is settled, | 很好 如果其他都没问题了 |
| [19:58] | let’s move on to the house. | 那就说房子吧 |
| [19:59] | Valerie still wants to sell the house. | Valerie还是想卖掉房子 |
| [20:01] | Drew still wants Valerie to take the house | Drew仍然希望Valerie保留房子 |
| [20:03] | and he’ll take the investments and CDs. | 他就可以收取投资回报和定期存款 |
| [20:05] | That is not gonna work for Valerie. | Valerie不想这样 |
| [20:07] | Drew would like to point out that the value of the house | Drew想说房子的价值 |
| [20:08] | exceeds the value of the investments and CDs. | 超过了投资回报和定期存款 |
| [20:10] | Valerie doesn’t care about the value of the house | Valerie不关心房子 |
| [20:12] | or the value of the investments and CDs. | 或者投资回报和定期存款 |
| [20:15] | ‐ I want full custody. ‐ Oh, come on, Val. | ‐ 我想要完全监护权 -拜托 Val |
| [20:17] | Drew, please, just let me handle it. | Drew让我来处理 |
| [20:19] | What, she wants full custody, but she doesn’t want the house? | 她想要完全监护权 又不想要房子 |
| [20:20] | This is ridiculous. | 这太扯淡了 |
| [20:22] | Where are you two going to live. | 你们俩打算住哪儿 |
| [20:24] | With Alex for now. | 暂时和Alex一起住 |
| [20:25] | Living with him isn’t healthy for her. | 和他住对她不好 |
| [20:28] | Well, neither is walking in and seeing her dad’s dick | 在屋里见到她爸和一个20岁的女的上床也不怎么好 |
| [20:30] | in a 20‐year‐old. | |
| [20:31] | Yeah, let’s not make this about that. | 那事和这个无关好吗 |
| [20:33] | [scoffs] How is this not about that? | 怎么就无关了 |
| [20:36] | Ask yourself why I want the 20‐year‐old. | 问问你自己为什么我想要找20岁的 |
| [20:42] | $2,200 a month. That’s his stipend. | 2200 那是他的津贴 |
| [20:45] | $2,200? | |
| [20:47] | I earned that money. You’re living rent‐free, | 钱是我赚的 你又不用交房租 |
| [20:49] | so that should be plenty. | 这钱对你足够了 |
| [20:51] | I hope to God our daughter doesn’t end up like you. | 祈祷上帝 我们的女儿不要变得像你一样 |
| [20:53] | Oh, how am I, Drew? | 我怎么样 Drew |
| [20:55] | Cold. Cold and alone. | 冷漠 冷漠又孤单 |
| [20:58] | Uh, maybe we should, uh, take a break. | 要不我们歇会儿吧 |
| [21:02] | Ha. [clears throat] | |
| [21:06] | [whispers] That didn’t go well. | |
| [21:12] | [soft instrumental music] | |
| [21:16] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [21:42] | Whoa. | |
| [21:44] | Where you going? | 你去哪儿 |
| [21:45] | Shut up. | 闭嘴 |
| [21:53] | [door slams] | |
| [22:17] | ‐ I’m Valerie. ‐ Leon, hi. | -我是Valerie -Leon 你好 |
| [22:24] | My name is Leon. I already said that. | 我叫Leon 我已经说过了 |
| [22:29] | Uh, can I buy you a drink, Valerie? | 能请你喝杯酒吗 Valerie |
| [22:34] | Leon, let me ask you something. | Leon 我问你件事 |
| [22:36] | If I asked you to take me home right now, | 如果我让你带我回家 |
| [22:38] | what would you say? | 你觉得怎么样 |
| [22:43] | Did, uh, Franco put you up to this? | 是Franco让你来的吗 |
| [22:48] | I don’t know Franco. | Franco是谁 |
| [22:52] | Look, are you‐‐ you wanna take me home | 你 你要带我回家吗 |
| [22:53] | or should I ask somebody else? | 还是我去找别人 |
| [22:57] | Oh, uh… | |
| [23:07] | So, um, where are you from, Valerie? | 你是哪里人 Valerie |
| [23:14] | Let’s not ruin this with conversation. | 我们就是不要让对话来坏气氛了 |
| [23:20] | [soft instrumental music] | |
| [23:23] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [23:54] | Jesus! | 我勒个去 |
| [23:56] | I’m Alex. | 我是Alex |
| [23:59] | Uh, Leon. | |
| [24:01] | You’re, uh, Valerie’s roommate? | 你是Valerie的室友吗 |
| [24:03] | Her brother, yeah. | 她弟弟 |
| [24:06] | Good to have another guy around her, Leon. | 她终于找男人了真好 Leon |
| [24:09] | I’ll see you at breakfast. Making waffles. | 早餐见 我会做华夫饼 |
| [24:15] | [After Laughter playing] | |
| [24:18] | ♪ ♪ | |
| [24:20] | ♪ After ♪ | |
| [24:23] | ♪ Laughter ♪ | |
| [24:25] | ♪ Comes tears ♪ | |
| [24:31] | ‐ ♪ After ♪ ‐ ♪ After ♪ | ‐ ♪ After ♪ |
| [24:33] | ‐ ♪ Laughter ♪ ‐ ♪ Your laughter ♪ | |
| [24:36] | ‐ ♪ Comes tears ♪ ‐ ♪ There’ll be tears ♪ | |
| [24:41] | ‐ ♪ Oooh ♪ ‐ ♪ When you’re in love ♪ | |
| [24:46] | ♪ You’re happy ♪ | |
| [24:50] | ♪ Oh, and when you’re in arms ♪ | |
| [24:55] | ♪ You gaze ♪ | |
| [25:02] | ‐ ♪ After ♪ ‐ ♪ After your laughter ♪ | |
| [25:06] | ‐ ♪ Comes tears ♪ ‐ ♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪ | |
| [25:12] | ♪ After your laughter… ♪ |