| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Max, I feel like this woman on Tinder | 麦克斯 我觉得约炮软件上的这妞 |
| [00:05] | is lying about her age. | 在年龄上撒谎了 |
| [00:07] | If she’s 78, I’m 25. | 如果她是78岁 那我就是25岁 |
| [00:12] | I’d say she’s 80, but that rack is 40. | 我觉得年龄大概80岁 奶子大概40岁 |
| [00:17] | Well, maybe I can squeeze her in tonight, | 我是可以把她挤进我今晚”日”程 |
| [00:20] | but I already got eight dates. | 但我已经跟八个妞有约了 |
| [00:22] | With my arthritis it’s impossible to swipe left. | 都是我这关节炎害我没法左划拒绝 |
| [00:39] | Girls, you’re going to have to close up tonight. | 姑娘们 今晚你们得负责打烊 |
| [00:42] | I’m pretty sure I have a date with Earl. | 我挺确定我厄尔跟我”约”上了 |
| [00:50] | Han, your only friend that isn’t imaginary is here. | 阿憨 你唯一存在的非幻想友人来了 |
| [00:54] | He’s dropping my VIP passes to Game Con. | 他是来给我送游戏展贵宾票 |
| [00:57] | Ned’s demo-ing the brand new video game he created, | 内德要展出他做出的全新电玩 |
| [00:59] | and I’ll be there | 我要去看 |
| [01:01] | hanging out in the cosplayer’s lair. | 然后跟玩角色扮演的妹子们厮混 |
| [01:04] | Is that where you don’t get laired? | 去那里被”撕”又”混”不上床吗 |
| [01:08] | Thank God I didn’t tell you it was sponsored by Virgin. | 幸好我没告诉你赞助商是维珍[处子]公司 |
| [01:14] | I don’t get video games. | 我对电玩理解无能 |
| [01:16] | In my day, if you wanted to enter another reality | 在我那年代 如果你想进入另一个虚拟现实 |
| [01:19] | you just took acid and went to the aquarium. | 你只需要吃迷幻药 然后去水族馆就行了 |
| [01:24] | Game Con has awesome swag bags. | 游戏展有很多超赞的礼包拿 |
| [01:26] | This year they’re handing out iPads, | 今年他们会发苹果的平板 |
| [01:28] | and last year I got the Microsoft Surface. | 去年我拿到了微软的平板 |
| [01:31] | You are a micro-soft surface. | 你的确是个又”微”又”软”的平板 |
| [01:36] | Have fun at Lollapa-loser. | 祝废柴电玩节玩得愉快 |
| [01:40] | I would never go to Lame Con. | 打死我也不去死宅展 |
| [01:45] | I’ve got to go to Game Con! | 我绝对得去游戏展 |
| [01:47] | So we can make fun of Han some more? | 好有更多嘲讽阿憨的机会吗 |
| [01:49] | Because video games really seem to be my put-down sweet spot. | 嘲讽游戏宅真是我的嘲讽强项啊 |
| [01:53] | Caroline, it’s about time you knew. | 卡洛琳 是时候让你知道了 |
| [01:56] | I’m really into video games. | 我是电玩上瘾者 |
| [01:58] | I’ve known since I was ten. | 我在10岁时发现这事 |
| [02:01] | Max, are you coming out to me as a game woman? | 麦克斯 你是在出柜跟我坦白你是游戏宅女吗 |
| [02:06] | There was this arcade | 在我妈妈常把我 |
| [02:07] | at the pizza place my mom used to leave me at. | 扔在披萨店自生自灭 那里有游戏机房 |
| [02:10] | Ms. Pac-Man taught me how to swallow pills. | 吃豆人教我怎么吞”药丸” |
| [02:14] | All right, well, if we’re confessing things, | 好吧 在这个开诚布公的时刻 |
| [02:16] | I really want a free iPad, so I guess | 我承认我超想要免费iPad |
| [02:18] | you’ll have to be nice to that nerd, | 你估计得对那个阿宅好一点 |
| [02:20] | even if he is a customer. | 哪怕他是客人你也得忍着 |
| [02:24] | All right, we got this. | 好的 我们能搞定 |
| [02:26] | Suck it up. | 忍气吞声 |
| [02:27] | I’m not sucking anything. | 我啥也不想”吞” |
| [02:30] | Hey, everybody! | 大家安安 |
| [02:37] | Well, I guess it’s true what they say. | 原来”常言道”是真的有道理 |
| [02:39] | You can’t hire my manicurist | 常言道 别请你的美甲师 |
| [02:41] | to put an addition on your apartment, yeah. | 来帮你的公寓搞装潢 |
| [02:46] | Oh, you’re renovating. | 你们在重新装潢啊 |
| [02:47] | That explains the banging and power drills I hear. | 难怪会听到有铁锤声跟电钻声 |
| [02:51] | Most of that was us. | 大多数是我们自己搞的 |
| [02:53] | We got some new sex toys. | 我们买了一些新性爱玩具 |
| [02:54] | It’s like Santa’s dirty workshop up there. | 家里简直就是圣诞老人的性爱玩具工厂 |
| [02:58] | See, we’re splitting the boudoir in half | 我们打算把我闺房分成两半 |
| [03:00] | so the baby can have its own bedroom. | 这样小孩也能有自己的房间 |
| [03:03] | Its own bedroom? | 自己的房间 |
| [03:05] | So the baby that you’re not even pregnant with yet | 所以你都还没怀上的那个孩子 |
| [03:08] | is doing better than old Caroline? | 已经比卡洛琳大姐过得还好了吗 |
| [03:10] | No, Ming Wa wants me to give up my walk-in closet. | 没 我的美甲师还想我改掉换衣间呢 |
| [03:14] | I mean, that’s where my purses and half my hair live. | 那可是我的包包跟我的假发住的地方 |
| [03:19] | So purses and hair are doing better than old Caroline too? | 所以包包跟假发也过得比卡洛琳大姐好吗 |
| [03:23] | Uh, earwax is doing better than old Caroline. | 一块耳屎都过得比卡洛琳大姐好 |
| [03:29] | Come on, Caroline. | 来吧 卡洛琳 |
| [03:30] | Let’s shake these asses and get them passes. | 屁股摇起来 门票拿过来 |
| [03:34] | Do you think I should shave my back | 你觉得我该为了明天的电玩展 |
| [03:35] | for tomorrow for Game Con? | 刮刮我的背毛吗 |
| [03:38] | My mom does. | 我妈觉得有必要 |
| [03:40] | Here are your fries. | 这是你的薯条 |
| [03:42] | Ned, have you been working out? | 内德 你最近在健身吗 |
| [03:46] | You know my name? | 你居然知道我的名字 |
| [03:48] | Max, take your hand away. | 麦克斯 快把手拿开 |
| [03:49] | You’ll kill him. | 他会爽”死”的 |
| [03:52] | Is there any way you can get me into Game Con tomorrow? | 你有办法把我弄进明天的游戏展吗 |
| [03:56] | Oh! This is rich. | 真是太超过了 |
| [03:58] | The hot girls need something from the nerds | 辣妹想从宅男身上捞好处 |
| [04:00] | like in science class or any marriage in L.A. | 就像科学课 或洛杉矶所有的婚姻一样 |
| [04:07] | I don’t have any more tickets… | 我没有多余的票 |
| [04:09] | or now a will to live. | 或者是活下去的勇气了 |
| [04:13] | So… this is awkward. | 这下尴尬了 |
| [04:17] | Well, puberty’s a challenging time, Han. | 青春期是比较难熬 阿憨 |
| [04:25] | I did it! | 我成功了 |
| [04:26] | I got us in. | 我把咱们搞进去了 |
| [04:27] | Max, again, I feel like the homeless shelter | 麦克斯 我真心觉得我们去住 |
| [04:30] | would be a step down for us. | 流浪汉之家会是一种退步 |
| [04:33] | To Game Con. | 是搞进电玩展 |
| [04:35] | I got us jobs as booth babes! | 我弄到了展场辣妹的工作 |
| [04:39] | I’d rather go to the shelter. | 我宁愿去住流浪汉之家 |
| [04:42] | What are booth babes? | 展场辣妹是什么鬼 |
| [04:45] | We just have to wear these dresses, | 我们只需要穿上这个裙子 |
| [04:47] | look hot, and hand out some flyers. | 打扮妖艳 然后发传单就行了 |
| [04:49] | Like a sexy Jehovah’s Witness. | 就跟是性感版的传教士 |
| [04:54] | Wearing that? | 穿那个吗 |
| [04:55] | – Where’s the top? – That is the top. | -上身在哪 -这就是上身啊 |
| [04:57] | – Okay, where’s the bottom? – You’re looking at it. | -好吧 那下身呢 -你正看着呢 |
| [04:58] | – Where’s the middle? – That’s it. | -那中间部分呢 -就这个 |
| [04:59] | – And the rest? – Oh, right. | -其他部分呢 -对哦 |
| [05:04] | Slutty boots! | 骚气长靴 |
| [05:07] | Are we really gonna show our vaginas for a gift bag? | 我们真的要为了一个礼包露”小妹妹”吗 |
| [05:13] | Yes, what else are they for? | 当然 不然要”她”何用 |
| [05:18] | You heard Han. | 你也听到阿憨说的了 |
| [05:19] | We could get a TV, XBoxes, your precious iPad. | 可能可以拿到电视 游戏机 你心爱的iPad |
| [05:23] | At the very least, bottled water. | 或者至少能捞到一瓶瓶装水 |
| [05:27] | It’s just so degrading to parade around in short skirts | 我只是觉得穿着短裙走来走去给人看 |
| [05:30] | and be fake nice to nerds and… | 还得对宅男们假亲切很… |
| [05:32] | Oh, my God, that’s what we do at the diner. | 靠 这就是我们在餐厅就是干这个的 |
| [05:36] | Hey, girls. | 姑娘们 |
| [05:42] | We had to fire our contractor. | 我们不得不炒了我们的承包商 |
| [05:44] | Yeah, it’s just taking too long. | 他搞半天都没成果 |
| [05:46] | It’s like having sex with a guy on Prozac. | 就跟吃了百忧解的软男做爱一样 |
| [05:52] | Been there. | 同是天涯沦落人 |
| [05:55] | And I’m still waiting. | 等到现在还没”爽”呢 |
| [05:59] | So we hired my cousin. | 所以我们雇了我表姐 |
| [06:01] | She and I have become close since we stopped dating. | 我们分手之后关系反而变好了 |
| [06:06] | I mean, we were going to stay at a hotel, | 我们本来打算去住酒店 |
| [06:08] | but why do that when we can stay with friends? | 但我们能跟朋友住 又何须去酒店呢 |
| [06:12] | Friends? What friends? | 朋友 哪来的朋友 |
| [06:15] | Not you, Caroline. Max. | 不是说你卡洛琳 是麦克斯 |
| [06:23] | I can’t believe what I’m wearing. | 真不敢相信我穿成这样 |
| [06:25] | This dress sets women back further than HBO’s “Ballers.” | 这衣服比电视剧《球手》还贬低女性 |
| [06:31] | Well, I think it’s nice to be paid to put on clothes for once. | 我觉得难得有人付钱让我穿上衣服很好啊 |
| [06:35] | “Ant Thrax”? | 拿一份传单吗 |
| [06:38] | You’ll have to get it. | 您得自己弯腰拿 |
| [06:39] | I can’t bend over any further | 我不能再弯了 |
| [06:40] | or everyone will see my PlayStation. | 否则我的”游戏机”就要露出来了 |
| [06:47] | Did a very slow earthquake just hit this booth? | 咱们这展点刚发生超慢速地震了吗 |
| [06:52] | Hi. Is this, like, a real dance, | 您好 请问这是真的舞步 |
| [06:54] | or should I go get help? | 还是病发作需要救护车 |
| [06:58] | They’re not having seizures. | 她们不是癫痫发作 |
| [06:59] | I think we’re supposed to dance like that. | 我们好像也应该这么跳起来 |
| [07:13] | Max? Caroline? | 麦克斯 卡洛琳 |
| [07:16] | Even though you just saw us doing that, | 尽管你刚才看到我们那样 |
| [07:18] | we are still so much cooler than you. | 我们还是比你酷太多了 |
| [07:22] | Yes, but the gap’s getting smaller. | 是啊 但是差距已经越来越小 |
| [07:25] | How did you two get in here? | 你们两个怎么进来的[到这一步] |
| [07:27] | A continuing series of bad decisions. | 感谢一路上无数的错误决定 |
| [07:29] | You wouldn’t help us, | 你不帮我们 |
| [07:31] | so we decided to be booth babes. | 所以我们决定来当展场辣妹 |
| [07:33] | The most recent in the continuing series of those bad decisions. | 无数的错误决定中 最新的一个错误 |
| [07:38] | Max, Caroline, I’d like you to meet my gamer crew. | 麦克斯 卡洛琳 介绍给你们我的玩家小伙伴 |
| [07:41] | Basically, my Han-tourage. | 我的憨兵卫 |
| [07:47] | You were right, this thing was sponsored by Virgin. | 你没说错 这绝对是处男[维珍]赞助的 |
| [07:52] | If you guys are here, | 如果你们都来这里了 |
| [07:53] | who’s watching your grandmother’s basements? | 你们在奶奶家地下室的老窝是谁在照看 |
| [07:56] | And this is my plus-one, Eunice. | 这位是我的女伴 尤妮斯 |
| [08:00] | AKA Super Nintend-Ho. | 又名”超级任舔糖” |
| [08:04] | We never met till today. | 我们今天是首次见面 |
| [08:06] | Isn’t he the cutest? | 他是不是超萌啊 |
| [08:08] | He saved me from a burning village, | 他把我从大火弥漫的村庄中救出来 |
| [08:09] | and then he asked me to marry him. | 然后他就跟我求婚了 |
| [08:12] | Actually, my avatar asked | 其实是我的角色 |
| [08:14] | her avatar to get married… | 跟她的角色求婚了 |
| [08:17] | in the game. | 游戏里结婚 |
| [08:20] | Congratulations. | 恭喜恭喜 |
| [08:21] | That’s not sad. | 这一点都不可悲 |
| [08:24] | I’m gonna go get my Pixel Pie a drink. | 我去给我的小萌物买杯喝的 |
| [08:26] | It’s the least I can do for the man | 这是小女子对将我从 |
| [08:27] | who pulled me from a roaring inferno. | 咆哮炼狱中救出的英雄的小小报答 |
| [08:31] | Hurry back! | 快去快回 |
| [08:33] | I should have let her burn! | 我真应该让她被烧死 |
| [08:37] | Are you kidding? | 你开什么玩笑 |
| [08:39] | She’s your type: | 她不就是你的理想型吗 |
| [08:40] | willing. | 饿虎扑羊 |
| [08:42] | But I can’t be tied down. | 但我不想放弃一片森林啊 |
| [08:45] | Between this VIP pass | 有着这贵宾票 |
| [08:46] | and my suite at the Holiday Inn Express, | 跟我在假日快捷酒店开好的房间 |
| [08:48] | I could be the Don Juan of Game Con. | 我能成为游戏展的西门庆呢 |
| [08:52] | She’s coming! | 她来了 |
| [08:55] | Oh, where’s Han Solo going? | 我的憨·索罗[星战角色]去哪了 |
| [08:58] | Uh… the Pokemon booth started a flash mob | 《神奇宝贝》的展场有快闪族活动 |
| [09:01] | and they needed a Pikachu. | 他们需要一只皮卡丘 |
| [09:04] | Death Bitch! | 死神婊 |
| [09:11] | I knew you seemed familiar. | 我就觉得你很眼熟 |
| [09:13] | You look like that new character, Death Bitch. | 你长得就像那个新角色”死神婊” |
| [09:15] | Your booth is right over there. | 你的展厅就在那边 |
| [09:17] | It’s the most popular video game here… | 是这个展场第二热门的游戏了 |
| [09:19] | after “Girlfriend Simulator.” | 第一是”虚拟女朋友” |
| [09:27] | Oh, my God, Max. | 天啊 麦克斯 |
| [09:32] | Look. | 你看 |
| [09:32] | Han’s gamer friend nerd is carrying you away. | 阿憨的游戏宅友要把你抱走了 |
| [09:37] | And I do not like where he has his hand. | 而且我对他手放的位置很有意见 |
| [09:39] | Ned, stop! | 内德 不许走 |
| [09:41] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
| [09:42] | At least buy me drink first. | 起码先请我喝杯酒再这样 |
| [09:46] | I’m just gonna put this down. | 我就把这个放下 |
| [09:50] | Ned, this is your game? | 内德 这是你的游戏吗 |
| [09:52] | You turned Max into some kind of Boobarella. | 你把麦克斯变成了巨乳女侠之类的人物 |
| [09:56] | I’m sorry, you weren’t supposed to see this yet. | 对不起 你们本不该现在就看到 |
| [09:58] | I was going to invite you to the official release party. | 我本来打算邀请你们参加正式发行派对 |
| [10:01] | If this guy’s having a release party, | 如果这男的要有发行[射]派对 |
| [10:03] | it’s probably into an old sock. | 那也是对着袜子里射[自慰] |
| [10:10] | By the way, I’m taking this. | 对了 这个我要拿走 |
| [10:12] | I need someone to cover my shift at the diner tomorrow. | 我需要有人顶替我明天餐厅的班 |
| [10:15] | I don’t think you’ll need to work at the diner | 如果他就此事做出赔偿 |
| [10:17] | after you’re compensated for Ned stealing your likeness. | 你就再也不需要在餐厅工作了 |
| [10:21] | My mom said it was fine. | 我妈说这没事啊 |
| [10:24] | I can get money for this? | 我能因为这个捞到钱吗 |
| [10:26] | Because I’m pretty sure | 我蛮确定 |
| [10:27] | “Grand Theft Auto” is based on how I got to New York. | 《侠盗猎车手》是抄袭我怎么去纽约的故事 |
| [10:31] | How you doing? | 两位姑娘好 |
| [10:32] | Tony Shapiro, Rock N’ Roll Games. | 托尼·夏皮罗 摇滚游戏公司 |
| [10:35] | Recently divorced. | 最近刚刚离婚 |
| [10:40] | Tony, I don’t think you bargained for | 托尼 我觉得你不会想跟一位 |
| [10:42] | a Wharton-educated booth babe… | 受过沃顿教育的展场辣妹讨价还价 |
| [10:44] | and neither did I. | 我也不会 |
| [10:47] | But your designer stole my friend’s likeness | 但贵公司的设计师未经过我朋友同意 |
| [10:48] | without her consent, | 盗用她的肖像权 |
| [10:49] | so we’re entitled to a percentage of the profits. | 所以我们有权获得一定比例的收益 |
| [10:52] | This illustration is not so similar that it would hold up | 这幅画没有那么像她 就算到了法庭 |
| [10:54] | in a court of law. | 我们也站得住脚 |
| [10:56] | Oh, my God, Death Bitch. | 我的老天 死神婊 |
| [11:00] | That’s not her. | 那不是她 |
| [11:01] | The hell it’s not. | 不是才有鬼咧 |
| [11:02] | Look at her, dude. | 瞧瞧她 伙计 |
| [11:03] | One, two. | 一个两个 货真价实 |
| [11:07] | Look, it’s clear you guys don’t have the money for a lawyer. | 很明显你们俩没有钱请律师 |
| [11:11] | That’s true. Keep talking. | 那倒是 继续说 |
| [11:13] | But I get you want a payday, | 但我懂你们想赚点小钱 |
| [11:14] | so I will pay your friend to play Amorta | 所以我会付钱请你的朋友扮演阿莫拉 |
| [11:17] | and take pictures with the fans at our photo booth tomorrow. | 明天在我们的拍照展位跟粉丝们合影 |
| [11:20] | You’re in luck. | 算你们走运 |
| [11:21] | The model we hired died of an overdose. | 我们之前请的模特死于吸毒过量 |
| [11:25] | At least she died doing what I love. | 至少她是死于我钟爱的事情 |
| [11:28] | Tony, we may look like we’ve settled in life, | 托尼 或许我们看起来像是不得不认命的人 |
| [11:30] | but we aren’t gonna settle here. | 但这件事我们一定抗争到底 |
| [11:32] | We stand to make millions if we take you to court. | 如果闹到法庭上 我们肯定要分几百万 |
| [11:34] | – No, you don’t. – That’s true, keep talking. | -不会的 -那倒是 继续说 |
| [11:37] | What do you want? | 你想怎么样 |
| [11:38] | Throw in a free iPad | 送一个免费iPad |
| [11:39] | and I’ll deliver her on-time and clean. | 我会准时把她干净送到 |
| [11:42] | You’ll get me here on time. | 准时能做到 干净就未必了 |
| [12:03] | Um… what’s happening here? | 这是闹哪出 |
| [12:04] | Is this the foreplay or the cleanup? | 是前戏 还是清理战场 |
| [12:08] | Sophie’s using a PedEgg on my feet. | 苏菲用磨脚器帮我磨脚呢 |
| [12:11] | And it tickles. | 好痒啊 |
| [12:14] | Yeah, you know, if you go just one day | 对啊 如果你放任自己一天 |
| [12:16] | without shaving calluses, | 没有磨脚上的老茧 |
| [12:18] | you’ve already lost the war. | 那你就满盘皆输了 |
| [12:22] | Yeah, well, I’m sorry for the mess. | 不好意思 把屋子弄得乱糟糟 |
| [12:25] | Uh, I had to bring down some basic necessities. | 我必须把一些日常必需品带下来 |
| [12:29] | Yeah, like… like plates and cups and toilet paper. | 比如盘子和杯子 还有厕纸 |
| [12:40] | Wait, is that a TV and an XBox in my apartment? | 等等 我公寓里是有一台电视和游戏机吗 |
| [12:45] | I don’t know what to do. | 我都激动得不知所措了 |
| [12:47] | I’ve been waiting for this day my whole life, | 我这辈子都在等这一天 |
| [12:49] | and now that it’s here I’m shy. | 而现在实现了 我却害羞了 |
| [12:52] | Yeah, this is how we watch TV. | 没错 我们就是这么看电视 |
| [12:54] | We get Hulu, Netflix, YouTube… | 我们有葫芦网 奈飞网 油管网 |
| [12:58] | YouSpank… | 打屁屁网 |
| [13:00] | SpankBank… | 打屁屁大全网 |
| [13:03] | PornOnTheCob. | 色情棒子网 |
| [13:06] | Can I pop in this sweet demo game I got today? | 我能试试今天拿的这张试玩游戏光盘吗 |
| [13:09] | It’s a hyper-sexualized, violent version of me | 这是超性感超暴力版的我 |
| [13:11] | who kills everyone who gets in my way. | 顺我者昌 逆我者亡 |
| [13:14] | It’s a biopic, really. | 说真的 这就是我的传记电影 |
| [13:16] | Stick it in and I’ll watch you play. | 插进去 我来看你玩 |
| [13:20] | Gosh, if I had a nickel every time Oleg said that… | 老天 如果他每次说这话我就有五分钱 |
| [13:23] | You’d be able to afford a hotel room? | 那你们现在就够钱住酒店了吗 |
| [13:27] | Okay, well, I’m gonna go in the other room, | 好吧 我要去另一间房 |
| [13:29] | anywhere but here… | 远离这里 |
| [13:31] | which now smells like patchouli and pierogis. | 虽然那房现在有股广藿香和波兰饺子味儿 |
| [13:36] | Oh, we have a sex swing now. | 我们房里都有性爱秋千了 |
| [13:40] | Welcome to Asrieth, Amorta. | 欢迎来到艾斯里瑟 阿莫拉 |
| [13:42] | You must kill anything that moves. | 你必须杀掉一切会动的东西 |
| [13:44] | Go. | 开始吧 |
| [13:49] | This chick is my spirit animal. | 这妞简直是我的精神野兽 |
| [13:53] | All she’s doing is drinking from a flask | 她做的不过是喝酒壶里的酒 |
| [13:55] | and punching people in the face. | 然后一拳揍人脸上 |
| [13:57] | Max, she’s just like you. | 麦克斯 她超像你 |
| [14:01] | Yak Girl, come! | 牦牛妹 快来 |
| [14:03] | I need you! | 我需要你 |
| [14:10] | What’s that silly animal thing? | 那个傻逼的动物是什么 |
| [14:13] | Yak Girl. | 牦牛妹 |
| [14:14] | I think she’s my sidekick. | 我觉得她是我的伙伴 |
| [14:18] | That thing looks just like Caroline. | 那玩意看起来超像卡洛琳 |
| [14:22] | It does! | 的确 |
| [14:23] | It looks like Caroline! | 它看起来像卡洛琳 |
| [14:26] | Why did I hear my name? | 为什么我听见了我的名字 |
| [14:28] | Why am I seeing a horse thing that has my face? | 为什么我看见一匹马长了我的脸 |
| [14:32] | Please, Caroline, it’s not a horse thing with your face. | 拜托 卡洛琳 这不是一匹马长了你的脸 |
| [14:34] | It’s a yak thing with your face. | 是一头牦牛长了你的脸 |
| [14:40] | That’s the sound you make | 在餐厅每次让你 |
| [14:42] | when you have to do side work at the diner. | 做一些琐碎的工作时 你就发出这声音 |
| [14:47] | Yak Girl, come! | 牦牛妹 快来 |
| [14:48] | Hey, look. | 瞧瞧 |
| [14:51] | Max, you’re riding her. | 麦克斯 你在骑她耶 |
| [14:56] | Oh, no, no way. | 不 不能这样 |
| [14:57] | I’m calling that Tony jerk right now. | 我现在就要打给那个叫托尼的混蛋 |
| [15:00] | So what? | 现在是怎样 |
| [15:01] | She just lets Death Bitch ride her? | 她就乖乖让死神婊骑她吗 |
| [15:03] | That’s all Yak Girl does? | 牦牛妹难道就这一个功能吗 |
| [15:05] | No, she poops when you hit this button. | 不啊 当一按这个按钮 她就会拉屎 |
| [15:13] | Ah, Caroline can’t stop pooping! | 卡洛琳 屎不停 |
| [15:17] | Just like that one time at the diner. | 就像某次在餐厅时那样 |
| [15:21] | Tony, this is Caroline Channing, | 托尼 我是卡洛琳·钱宁 |
| [15:23] | AKA Yak Girl. | 又称牦牛妹 |
| [15:25] | I am taking you to court. | 我要把你告上法庭 |
| [15:28] | That’s true. Keep talking. | 那倒是 继续说 |
| [15:31] | That’s your big offer? | 那就是你丰厚补偿吗 |
| [15:32] | That I dress like that and take pictures with nerds? | 让我打扮成那样 跟阿宅们合影 |
| [15:35] | Well, let me just say to you, sir, | 让我这么跟你说吧 先生 |
| [15:38] | I will need an iPad, as well. | 我还要一个免费iPad |
| [15:46] | Somebody better go out and get that toilet paper. | 某人最好快去拿厕纸哦 |
| [15:57] | How long till Death Bitch? | 死神婊还有多久才到 |
| [15:58] | I have to go take my medication. | 我得先吃药 |
| [16:01] | What are you taking? You got any extra? | 你吃什么药 可以分我点吗 |
| [16:05] | Right this way. | 这边请 |
| [16:06] | This is so exciting. | 真是太让人兴奋了 |
| [16:13] | This will be fun. | 这应该很好玩 |
| [16:14] | I haven’t been paid to be a bitch | 自从不在机动车管理局干后 |
| [16:16] | since I worked at the DMV. | 很久没人花钱请我当婊子了 |
| [16:18] | Ooh, a green screen. | 哇 绿屏 |
| [16:19] | Look, I’m on another planet. | 瞧 我在另一个星球 |
| [16:21] | Finally got that vacation. | 外太空的假期梦终于实现了 |
| [16:24] | Hey, Yak Girl, come on out. Time is money! | 牦牛妹 快出来 时间就是金钱 |
| [16:34] | You okay in there? | 你在里面还好吗 |
| [16:35] | This is what it must be like for Kim Kardashian to enter a room. | 卡戴珊在别人面前亮相时肯定也是这感觉 |
| [16:40] | All right, it’s pretty simple. | 好了 流程很简单 |
| [16:42] | One picture. | 合影一张 |
| [16:43] | And don’t worry if you get a boner. | 如果你”硬”了 别担心 |
| [16:44] | We’ll crop it out. | 我们会改图去掉它 |
| [16:48] | Could I be any more humiliated? | 我还能再丢脸一点吗 |
| [16:50] | I just want a photo with her. | 我只想跟她合影 |
| [16:52] | Not you. | 不是你 |
| [16:54] | I guess you could. | 我猜你能 |
| [16:55] | Fine, I’m probably due for a poop, anyway. | 好吧 反正我本来也差不多该拉屎了 |
| [17:02] | I’m okay! | 我没事 |
| [17:05] | Can you chop my head off? | 你能把我头砍掉吗 |
| [17:07] | It’ll be the best head you’ll ever get. | 你此生有戏得到的最佳砍头[口交] |
| [17:15] | All right, get out of here. I killed you. | 好了 快滚 我已经杀死你了 |
| [17:17] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [17:18] | Death Bitch, say your catchphrase. | 死神婊 说你的招牌口头禅 |
| [17:20] | Remember: even in death, | 记住 即使在冥界 |
| [17:23] | you’re my bitch. | 你仍是我的小婊砸 |
| [17:27] | I’m really liking this identity. | 我真的好喜欢这个身份 |
| [17:29] | It’s better than the other 17 I’ve had. | 这比我另外17个身份好多了 |
| [17:33] | Nobody wants to take a photo with me. | 没人想跟我合影 |
| [17:34] | I mean, baby got yak, right, Max? | 拜托 姐可是牦牛啊 对吧 麦克斯 |
| [17:38] | Will you just let me enjoy this? | 你就不能让我享受这身份吗 |
| [17:40] | This is a dream come true for me. | 这对我来说 就是梦想成真 |
| [17:41] | I’m at a game convention. | 我在一个游戏展上 |
| [17:43] | I’m the star of a video game. | 我是一个电子游戏里的明星 |
| [17:45] | I can kill without consequences. | 我可以不顾后果大开杀戒 |
| [17:47] | I’m pretty much peaking right now. | 我现在几乎就是人生巅峰啊 |
| [17:49] | Yeah, well, I have hooves. | 是啊 而我有蹄子 |
| [17:50] | Can I just be upset for one minute? | 我就不能难过一分钟吗 |
| [17:55] | Max, hide me. | 麦克斯 快把我藏起来 |
| [17:58] | Looks like you’re doing a pretty good job of that yourself. | 貌似你的隐藏技能已经很厉害了 |
| [18:02] | Seriously, help. | 别闹了 快救命 |
| [18:04] | Get back here, Han Solo! | 快回来 憨·索罗 |
| [18:06] | You promised we’d build our lives together. | 你答应我要跟我一起生活 |
| [18:08] | We shared that Hot Pocket “Lady in the Tramp” style. | 我们也有过”小姐上流氓”式分食速食派了 |
| [18:08] | 源自卡通电影《小姐与流氓》 两人咬住同个食物两端 慢慢往中间吃去 | |
| [18:12] | Uh, miss? | 这位小姐 |
| [18:13] | There’s gotta be better people out there. | 肯定有比他更好的男人 |
| [18:15] | Have you tried literally anyone else? | 你没跟”任何男人”试过吗 |
| [18:18] | I convinced my sister to sign me out for this weekend, | 我说服我姐姐签字让精神病院放我出来 |
| [18:23] | so you are not gonna stop me from seeing my Han. | 所以你决不能阻止我见我的阿憨 |
| [18:26] | Back off, Amorta! | 闪开 阿莫拉 |
| [18:30] | Uh, Han, you’re on your own. | 阿憨 你得靠自己了 |
| [18:32] | I can’t ruin this costume. | 我不能毁了这身戏服 |
| [18:33] | I’m gonna need it the next time I have to get out of jury duty. | 我下次想逃脱陪审团职责时 还得靠这身衣服 |
| [18:37] | Oh, no, I’m a goner. | 天啊 我死定了 |
| [18:38] | She’s gonna eat me alive. | 她肯定会把我生吞活剥 |
| [18:39] | You should have seen her go to town on that Hot Pocket. | 你们没看到共食速食派时 她差点把我搞怀孕的样儿 |
| [18:42] | Out of the way, Han. I’ll show you all | 走开 阿憨 我证明给大家看 |
| [18:44] | I can do more than just poop. | 我能做的不光是拉屎 |
| [18:55] | Uh, Yak Girl? | 牦牛妹 |
| [18:57] | Your heinie quarters are showing. | 你的屁屁部位露出来了 |
| [19:01] | Got it. | 拍到了 |
| [19:02] | This is gonna make the girl I’m catfishing real jealous. | 这肯定会让我在网上骗的那个妹子吃醋 |
| [19:18] | Hey, Earl. | 厄尔 |
| [19:19] | Hey, Caroline. Hey, Max. | 卡洛琳 麦克斯 |
| [19:21] | Hey, Max. | 麦克斯 |
| [19:26] | Hi, Max. Hey. | 你好 麦克斯 |
| [19:28] | Look at that. | 瞧瞧 |
| [19:30] | I have the exact same antlers. | 我有一副一模一样的鹿角 |
| [19:34] | That’s not me. | 那不是我 |
| [19:35] | You can tell by how fast she’s moving. | 看她移动速度这么快就知道了 |
| [19:38] | Know what’s not moving fast? | 你知道什么不快吗 |
| [19:41] | Our construction. | 我们家的装修 |
| [19:42] | Yeah, we had to fire Oleg’s cousin. | 对 我们不得不解雇奥列格的表姐 |
| [19:46] | Turns out the sexual tension was still there. | 事实证明 性的吸引力还在 |
| [19:49] | Her body… not so much. | 而她当年的肉体…不复存在 |
| [19:52] | Yeah, so it’s gonna take at least another week. | 是呀 所以至少还要一周的时间 |
| [19:55] | A week? | 一周吗 |
| [19:56] | There goes the “No sex while Max and Caroline are awake” rule. | “麦与卡醒着时不爱爱”的原则我可不守了 |
| [20:02] | That wasn’t sex you were having in front of us? | 你们在我俩面前搞得那样居然还不算做爱 |
| [20:08] | Max, Caroline, | 麦克斯 卡洛琳 |
| [20:09] | I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you | 我不知道该如何报答你俩 |
| [20:11] | for getting Eunice off my back. | 替我摆脱尤妮斯的恩情 |
| [20:13] | I do. | 我知道 |
| [20:14] | Sophie and Oleg are staying at your place for a week. | 苏菲和奥列格会去你家住一周 |
| [20:21] | I was thinking an extra baked potato with your shift meal. | 我本想着是工作餐多加一个烤土豆呢 |
| [20:26] | Yeah, Han, um… | 对了 阿憨 |
| [20:27] | how much bouncing can your bed take? | 你家的床能承受多大强度的”蹦跶” |
| [20:33] | You’re killing me, Max. | 你真是要了我的命 麦克斯 |
| [20:35] | Yep, even in death, | 是的 即使在冥界 |
| [20:37] | you’re my bitch. | 你仍是我的小婊砸 |