| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Welcome to the Williamsburg Diner. | 欢迎光临威廉斯堡餐厅 |
| [00:03] | Your lifespan just decreased by one meal. | 这一顿饭将助你缩年减寿 |
| [00:11] | Would you like to order now | 你是要现在点餐 |
| [00:12] | or after that galaxy is destroyed? | 还是等那星系被毁灭后点 |
| [00:16] | Oh, dude, I can hold up one finger, too, | 兄弟 我也能对你竖起一根手指 |
| [00:18] | and trust me; it won’t be that one. | 相信我 绝对不是食指 |
| [00:22] | Booth one is all yours. | 一号卡座归你了 |
| [00:23] | If I wanted to deal with a guy | 如果我想跟一个 |
| [00:25] | who won’t even acknowledge my existence, | 不愿正视我存在的男人打交道 |
| [00:26] | I’d track down my father. | 我早去找我爹了 |
| [00:29] | Makeup needs to complement the personality. | 妆容得填补你个性上的不足 |
| [00:31] | Sorry, I wasn’t listening. | 抱歉 没在听 |
| [00:34] | Mr. Eye Queen’s about to show me how to pluck my eyebrows. | 眼后正要教我怎么拔眉毛 |
| [00:38] | Finally. | 终于啊 |
| [00:38] | I’ve been telling you for a year you need to get plucked. | 我都跟你说了一年了 你得拔拔眉毛 |
| [00:44] | Pick up. Fried egg over easy. | 上菜 半熟蛋 |
| [00:47] | Correction: make that over hard. | 修正 是全”硬” |
| [00:51] | Max, that’s Earl’s order. | 麦克斯 那是厄尔点的 |
| [00:52] | Can you? | 帮忙一下吧 |
| [00:53] | You know, I could just check out | 我也能时间一到下班走人 |
| [00:55] | and phone in this job, too, | 工作时浑水摸鱼啊 |
| [00:56] | but I promised myself | 但我答应过自己 |
| [00:57] | I’d never grow up to be my gynecologist. | 长大后绝不当我妇科医生那样的人 |
| [01:01] | Earl, I know you remember a time | 厄尔 我知道你一定还记得 |
| [01:03] | where people still made eye contact | 人们彼此间会有眼神交流 |
| [01:05] | and get the fact that I was totally dissing them. | 能看到我眼中鄙视的那段美好时光 |
| [01:07] | It’s a damn shame, Max. | 真是太遗憾了 麦克斯 |
| [01:09] | Thank you, Earl. | 谢谢 厄尔 |
| [01:10] | The Mets are down in the bottom of the sixth. | 纽约大都会棒球队六局下半了还落后 |
| [01:14] | Now you have one? | 连你都有智能手机了吗 |
| [01:15] | Earl, three months ago, | 厄尔 三个月之前 |
| [01:17] | you thought T-Mobile was a rapper. | 你还以为T电信是饶舌歌手名呢 |
| [01:22] | Max, I want to talk to you. | 麦克斯 我想跟你说件事 |
| [01:25] | Well, why not? | 有何不可 |
| [01:25] | Everyone else is listening to something tiny | 大家也都在听着亚洲产的 |
| [01:27] | and made in Asia. | 小东西说话 |
| [01:31] | I just heard the funniest joke. | 我刚听到了世上最好笑的笑话 |
| [01:33] | A guy is driving a car up a hill | 有个男的开车上坡 |
| [01:35] | and he sees a pig in the road. | 他看到路上有只猪 |
| [01:36] | Wait. Oh yes, I forgot. | 对了 我忘了一部分 |
| [01:38] | It’s raining. | 当时正下着雨 |
| [01:39] | It’s raining, and there is a pig. | 当时正下着雨 路上有只猪 |
| [01:42] | I’m listening. | 我听着呢 |
| [01:43] | And then the pig is in the car– | 然后猪在车子上 |
| [01:44] | no, the pig is in the road, | 不对 猪在路上 |
| [01:46] | and–I’ll be right back. | 然后… 我马上回来 |
| [02:03] | Thank you. Come again. | 谢谢 欢迎再度光临 |
| [02:04] | Hey, what do you want to do after work tonight? | 今晚下班后你想做什么 |
| [02:07] | Maybe we could go to that trendy new ice cream place | 我们可以一起去那家很潮只卖果汁的 |
| [02:09] | that only sells juice. | 新冰激凌店啊 |
| [02:12] | Nah, I’m too tired. | 不要 我太累了 |
| [02:13] | I’ve been on my feet since 2003. | 我从03年开始就没坐下休息过 |
| [02:17] | Hi, can I get a red velvet– | 我能要一个红丝绒… |
| [02:19] | Oh, my God, Max Black? | 天啊 麦克斯·布莱克[黑] |
| [02:21] | Oh, my God, Becky White? | 我勒个去 贝姬·怀特[白] |
| [02:26] | Holy crap. How long has it been? | 哇靠 我们都多久没见面了 |
| [02:29] | Let’s see. When was I on “Intervention”? | 我上次上《批斗会》节目是哪年的事了 |
| [02:29] | 美国真人秀节目 实拍有酗酒 暴力 吸毒的人 访问其家庭成员 让他们说服主角同意接受帮助 | |
| [02:32] | Well, your hair’s grown back on the right side, | 你的头发又长回好看的那边了 |
| [02:33] | so I’d say five years. | 所以我猜大概五年了吧 |
| [02:36] | Hi, I’m Caroline. | 你好 我叫卡洛琳 |
| [02:37] | I’d wait for Max to introduce me, | 我也想等麦克斯跟你介绍我 |
| [02:39] | but she usually tells people | 但她通常告诉别人 |
| [02:40] | I’m Taylor Swift’s slow cousin Randi. | 我是泰勒·斯威夫特弱智的表姐 兰蒂 |
| [02:44] | Nice to meet you. | 幸会 |
| [02:45] | Max, I did not think you would still be alive. | 麦克斯 我真没想到你还活着 |
| [02:47] | I owe you $10. | 那我赌输你十块 |
| [02:50] | Becky’s an actress. | 贝姬是个女演员 |
| [02:51] | I just saw her in “Law and Order.” | 我才看了她出演电视剧《法律与秩序》 |
| [02:53] | She owned “Deli worker who barely knew the victim.” | 她演”跟被害人不太熟的熟食店员”超精彩 |
| [02:57] | Yeah, I’ve done three “Law and Orders.” | 对啊 我演过三次《法律与秩序》了 |
| [03:00] | Pretty easy work. | 工作挺简单的 |
| [03:00] | They usually find me in a trunk. | 我的尸首通常在某人后车厢被人发现 |
| [03:04] | How do you two know each other? | 你们怎么认识的 |
| [03:05] | Max and I waited tables together. | 麦克斯跟我以前一起当过服务员 |
| [03:07] | Well, mostly stood around and got drunk, | 其实通常就干站着跟喝醉酒 |
| [03:09] | but they paid us. | 但还是薪水拿啊 |
| [03:12] | Nice shop. | 小店不错 |
| [03:13] | Looks like you guys have a business together too. | 看来你们俩也一起做生意啊 |
| [03:15] | Too? | 也有 |
| [03:15] | You two too? | 你们也有过吗 |
| [03:18] | We invented an Uber just for women. | 我们发明了只服务女性的优步 |
| [03:20] | Boober. | 奶步 |
| [03:23] | It would’ve been awesome, | 其实应该挺有前景的 |
| [03:24] | except we didn’t have an app…or a car. | 不过我们没有软件 或车 |
| [03:28] | Hey, forget about this cupcake. | 别管这小蛋糕店了 |
| [03:29] | I just got paid. | 我刚发薪水 |
| [03:30] | How about drinks on me? | 我请喝酒怎么样 |
| [03:32] | And by drinks, I mean one PBR each. | 我说的请喝酒 是指一人一瓶蓝带啤酒 |
| [03:35] | I guess I could do drinks. | 我也不介意喝一杯 |
| [03:36] | Do you mind closing up? Thanks. | 能麻烦你负责打烊吗 谢啦 |
| [03:38] | I’ll meet you out front. | 我出来前门找你 |
| [03:39] | Awesome. | 赞 |
| [03:40] | Nice meeting you, Brandi. | 很高兴认识你 布兰蒂 |
| [03:41] | It’s Randi! | 是兰蒂 |
| [03:46] | Hey, Earl, what’s shaking? | 厄尔 还好吗[摇晃] |
| [03:48] | Max, I’m pushing 80. | 麦克斯 我都要80岁了 |
| [03:49] | The easier question is, “What isn’t shaking?” | 你问”有啥不在摇晃”比较好答 |
| [03:54] | Max, where were you last night? | 麦克斯 你昨晚上哪去了 |
| [03:56] | I had to watch “Carson Daly” alone and say, | 害我得自己看《卡森·达利秀》 |
| [03:56] | 《Last Call with Carson Daly》2002年初开播 目前已1600多集 | |
| [03:58] | “This show’s still on?” to no one. | 然后跟自己吐槽”这节目还在播啊” |
| [04:02] | I crashed on Becky’s couch, | 我昨晚在贝姬家沙发上睡了 |
| [04:03] | of which– you’re not gonna believe this– | 而且 说了你也不敢信 |
| [04:05] | she is the first owner. | 沙发居然是她新买的呢 |
| [04:10] | So did you guys have fun last night, | 你们昨晚玩得开心吗 |
| [04:12] | or was it weird because you’ve grown apart? | 还是已渐行渐远所以挺尴尬 |
| [04:15] | Let’s just say we’re gonna be in not one, | 这么说吧 我俩好到要去参加 |
| [04:17] | but two wedding albums. | 两个婚礼了 |
| [04:21] | Becky can dance her some hora. | 贝姬可会跳犹太婚礼圆圈舞呢 |
| [04:25] | Fun. | 好玩 |
| [04:26] | That’s so fun that you had fun. | 你玩得好真是太好玩了 |
| [04:29] | Uh, what’s happening here? | 你这是闹哪样 |
| [04:32] | I guess I just thought we were… | 我以为我们是… |
| [04:35] | Forget it. | 算了 不说了 |
| [04:36] | Oh, no, please. | 千万别 |
| [04:37] | It’s like watching a bird fly into a window in slow motion. | 这就像在看一只鸟要撞上窗户的慢动作版 |
| [04:41] | Well, you know, I thought we were exclusive, | 我还以为我们专属彼此 |
| [04:44] | for lack of a better word. | 我想不到更好的词了 |
| [04:46] | What, like monogamous? | “一夫一妻”这样的词吗 |
| [04:47] | You thought we were in a monogamous friendship? | 你觉得我们是一夫一妻般的友谊吗 |
| [04:51] | I’m not even monogamous with the people I’m monogamous with. | 我跟我该一夫一妻的人 都不是一夫一妻制了 |
| [04:55] | What is the big deal? | 这有啥大不了啊 |
| [04:56] | You had friends before we were friends. | 在我们成为朋友前 你也有朋友啊 |
| [04:59] | Bunch of rich bitches. | 一帮有钱婊 |
| [05:02] | You guys talking about that show, “Friends”? | 你们是在聊电视剧《老友记》吗 |
| [05:05] | People always say, “Why was there no black friend?” | 人们总说”为什么里面没有黑人老友” |
| [05:08] | Because no reasonable black man | 因为任何一个脑子没病的黑人 |
| [05:10] | would hang out with those people. | 都不会跟那帮人当朋友 |
| [05:15] | He’s been waiting to get that off his chest | 他等着说出这段话 |
| [05:16] | since the mid-’90s. | 大概等了20年了吧 |
| [05:19] | You know what I just realized? | 你知道我刚意识到什么吗 |
| [05:20] | I’ve never tried to make friends as a not-rich person. | 我还没有试过以穷人身份跟人交朋友 |
| [05:24] | You made friends with me. | 你交了我这个朋友啊 |
| [05:26] | Against my will, but still. | 虽然我被强迫中奖 但也算数啊 |
| [05:28] | Guess what I’m doing? | 你猜我要干嘛 |
| [05:29] | Motivating me to look at resumes on monster.com? | 给我上求职网站看人履历的动力吗 |
| [05:34] | I’m gonna make a friend right now. | 我现在要去跟人交朋友 |
| [05:35] | There’s a girl in my section with clean-ish looking hair. | 我服务区有一个头发称得上干净的姑娘 |
| [05:39] | Speaking of hair, pick up. | 说到”毛发” 上菜 |
| [05:41] | Cobb salad. | 科布沙拉 |
| [05:44] | Max, how’s this for my friend-making smile? | 麦克斯 我这个交友笑容如何 |
| [05:49] | Do you have more teeth than me? | 你的牙齿总数是不是比我多啊 |
| [05:55] | Here’s you salad. Dressing on the side. | 这是您的沙拉 调味料分开放了 |
| [05:57] | I’m sort of a “DOS” gal myself. | 我自己也是”调分放”那种女孩 |
| [06:01] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [06:03] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [06:04] | Maybe we should, I don’t know, grab a couple salads sometime. | 或许我们哪天应该一起把沙拉言欢 |
| [06:07] | The Yelp review specifically said | 点评网特别说了 |
| [06:09] | I would be ignored by the waitstaff. | 服务员绝对不会鸟我 |
| [06:12] | There’s hair in your salad. | 你的沙拉里有”毛” |
| [06:15] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [06:16] | The water’s supposed to be that color. | 这里的水就是那个颜色 |
| [06:18] | No, no. | 不 不是的 |
| [06:20] | I just think it’s cool how brave you were | 我觉得你这么勇敢很酷 |
| [06:22] | to put yourself out there like that. | 敢于跟陌生人交朋友 |
| [06:24] | I haven’t been called cool since I had a black card | 我上一次被说酷 还是拥有一张黑卡 |
| [06:26] | and owned 3/4 of an island. | 与3/4个岛的时候呢 |
| [06:29] | I’m Rachel. This is Kathy. | 我叫瑞秋 这位是凯西 |
| [06:31] | I’m Caroline, | 我叫卡洛琳 |
| [06:31] | and you have no idea how brave I am. | 你们绝对想不到我有多勇敢 |
| [06:33] | You should see where I shower. | 你们应该看看我洗澡的地方 |
| [06:37] | She should come to our party. | 她应该来参加我们的派对 |
| [06:38] | She just moved to Williamsburg, | 她刚搬来威廉斯堡 |
| [06:40] | and we’re having a party tomorrow. | 我们明天打算举办一个派对 |
| [06:41] | – You should come. – Oh, you know what? | -你应该一起来 -其实呢 |
| [06:42] | I’m busy tomorrow night because I’m going to your party! | 我明晚有点忙 因为我要去参加你的派对 |
| [06:49] | I’ve seen people with podcasts less desperate for approval. | 那些搞播客的人都没她这么渴求认同 |
| [06:58] | Max, I had the most amazing night. | 麦克斯 我昨晚玩得超开心 |
| [07:00] | Me too. Becky just left. | 我也是 贝姬刚走 |
| [07:02] | She has to get up early tomorrow. | 她明天得早起 |
| [07:04] | Not to brag, but she’s playing a dead hooker | 不是要炫耀 但她要在电视剧《警察世家》中 |
| [07:06] | on “Blue Bloods.” | 演死掉的妓女 |
| [07:08] | Oh, so she came here for research. | 所以她来这里做调查学习吗 |
| [07:11] | Anyways, my new friends Rachel and Kathy | 我的新朋友们瑞秋与凯西 |
| [07:13] | and everybody there were so warm and positive. | 以及派对上的所有人都好温暖与正能量 |
| [07:17] | It was so refreshing to be around people | 跟一群发愤图强并努力向前的人相处 |
| [07:18] | who were super driven and focused. | 好让人精神振作啊 |
| [07:22] | And we had such interesting conversations. | 而且昨晚我们的聊天特别有意思 |
| [07:24] | Honestly, after talking to them, | 老实说 跟她们聊完天后 |
| [07:26] | I felt like anything is possible. | 我觉得没有什么事是做不到的 |
| [07:28] | Oh, you guys did molly? | 你们嗑药啦 |
| [07:32] | Now I’m jealous. | 现在我嫉妒了 |
| [07:34] | These people don’t need drugs to be happy. | 这些人不需要靠嗑药来快乐 |
| [07:37] | Oh, so it’s a cult. | 所以是邪教 |
| [07:40] | How did you get cult from that? | 你是从哪推理出他们是邪教 |
| [07:42] | You think the only way I can make friends | 你觉得我唯一能交到朋友的方法 |
| [07:44] | is by joining a cult? | 就是加入邪教吗 |
| [07:45] | No. | 不是 |
| [07:46] | You could also always have gum. | 你也可以靠分享口香糖交友啊 |
| [07:49] | In fact, they’re so nice, | 其实 他们人好到 |
| [07:51] | they invited you to come for the weekend. | 他们邀请你一起去欢度周末 |
| [07:53] | Fresh country air. | 新鲜乡村空气 |
| [07:54] | – No thanks. – Gorgeous views. | -恕难从命 -美丽自然风光 |
| [07:55] | – Not for me. – Free food and booze. | -欣赏无能 -免费食物酒水 |
| [07:57] | I could be in a cult for the weekend. | 我不介意周末加入一下邪教 |
| [08:05] | This place is amazing. | 这里真是太棒了 |
| [08:07] | I know. Fancy. | 对啊 高大上 |
| [08:10] | And that was the first bus I’ve been on | 刚才那也是我第一次坐巴士 |
| [08:11] | where I didn’t see an under-the-blanket handy. | 没有碰到有人用衣服盖着玩”鸟” |
| [08:15] | I’m Topher. From the bus. | 我叫”托福儿” 刚才坐同一班巴士 |
| [08:18] | You were throwing sunflower seeds in my hair. | 你刚才一直丢葵花籽到我头发上 |
| [08:21] | This is Lady Marmalade. | 她叫果酱女郎 |
| [08:23] | People named Topher shouldn’t be allowed | 名字叫托福儿的人不应该有 |
| [08:25] | to name other living things. | 命名其他活体生物的权利 |
| [08:28] | Please don’t make fun of her. | 请不要取笑她 |
| [08:29] | She has seasonal depression. | 她有季节性抑郁症 |
| [08:31] | We both do. | 我俩都有 |
| [08:34] | Hey, Caroline, I’m so glad you could come. | 卡洛琳 你来真是太好了 |
| [08:37] | And you must be… | 想必你就是… |
| [08:38] | Starving. | 饿死鬼投胎 |
| [08:41] | Just give me the tray. | 整盘直接给我就行了 |
| [08:44] | This is Max. | 她是麦克斯 |
| [08:45] | Thank you so much for inviting us. | 谢谢你邀请我们一起来 |
| [08:47] | Yeah, the last invitation we got was to audition for porn. | 我们上次被人邀请 是去面试拍黄片 |
| [08:52] | Less of an invitation; | 也不太算是邀请 |
| [08:53] | more of a shout from a convertible. | 基本上就是敞篷车里有人喊 |
| [08:56] | “You girls want to do porn?” | “美女们有兴趣拍黄片吗” |
| [09:01] | Well, Elaine will be out in a minute, | 伊莱恩很快就会出来 |
| [09:03] | so in the meantime, just be your awesome self. | 在此之前 就继续当你们棒棒哒自己吧 |
| [09:07] | Isn’t she great? | 她是不是很赞 |
| [09:08] | So see? It’s nice here. | 你看 这里很好 |
| [09:10] | And you thought it was a cult. | 你还觉得这里是邪教呢 |
| [09:11] | I also thought peanuts never touched the eggs at the diner, | 我也曾以为餐厅里的花生没沾到蛋上呢 |
| [09:15] | but then that lady died. | 结果那女士过敏翘辫子了 |
| [09:18] | Welcome, everyone. | 欢迎各位 |
| [09:20] | Hi, Elaine. | 你好啊 伊莱恩 |
| [09:22] | There are only two rules in this house: | 这个屋子里只有两条规矩 |
| [09:24] | love one another | 彼此友爱 |
| [09:26] | and don’t talk to the neighbors. | 以及不许跟邻居说话 |
| [09:27] | I hate them. | 我恨死他们了 |
| [09:32] | I’m so glad you all could make it. | 我很高兴你们大家全都能出席 |
| [09:34] | Oh, except Jerry. | 除了杰瑞不能来 |
| [09:35] | He’s getting LASIK. | 他去做激光矫正手术 |
| [09:36] | He should’ve listened. I told him to eat more kale. | 他当初就该听我的 我让他多吃甘蓝菜 |
| [09:39] | Kale is good for the eyes. | 甘蓝菜对眼睛好 |
| [09:41] | Okay. | 好了 |
| [09:42] | Now make yourselves at home. | 大家把这里当自己家吧 |
| [09:44] | You mean don’t pay our rent | 是指不付房租 |
| [09:45] | and hide every time we hear someone in the hall? | 一听到走廊有人就躲起来吗 |
| [09:49] | Elaine, this is Caroline, | 伊莱恩 这位是卡洛琳 |
| [09:51] | our new friend. | 我们的新朋友 |
| [09:53] | Hello, Caroline. | 你好 卡洛琳 |
| [09:54] | I’ve heard so many wonderful things. | 久仰美名 |
| [09:56] | And you are? | 这位是 |
| [09:57] | Looking for some dipping sauces. | 正在寻觅蘸酱 |
| [10:01] | I’m Max. | 我是麦克斯 |
| [10:01] | A lady who knows what she wants. I like that. | 一位知道自己想要什么的姑娘 我喜欢 |
| [10:04] | My ex-husband knew what he wanted: | 我的前夫也知道自己想要什么 |
| [10:06] | to be a woman. | 成为一名女性 |
| [10:08] | And now he is. | 他做到了 |
| [10:10] | I miss her. | 我好想她 |
| [10:13] | And all my shoes. | 以及我的所有鞋子 |
| [10:15] | I hear you, sister. | 我理解你的心情 姐们 |
| [10:17] | But seriously, something like a honey mustard | 但说真的 有没有蜂蜜芥末酱 |
| [10:19] | or really anything in the Dijon world. | 或任何法式芥末酱都行 |
| [10:22] | Whoo, she’s a tough nut. | 哇 这果子不好啃 |
| [10:24] | My favorite kind. | 我的最爱 |
| [10:25] | Except for cashews. | 腰果除外 |
| [10:30] | Max, Elaine is amazing. | 麦克斯 伊莱恩赞赞哒 |
| [10:32] | Look around. | 环顾四周 |
| [10:33] | This is my new social circle. | 这就是我的新社交圈 |
| [10:35] | This is the saddest circle I’ve seen | 这是我见过最悲哀的圈了 |
| [10:37] | since my mom peed on the floor at Wal-Mart. | 上一次是我妈在沃尔玛地板上尿出个圈 |
| [10:40] | Can you just admit it’s not a cult? | 你就不能承认这不是邪教吗 |
| [10:42] | Everyone gather ’round. | 大家围过来 |
| [10:44] | Let’s have some mutual eye contact. | 我们来进行相互眼神交流 |
| [10:47] | That’s nice. That’s just being a person. | 这个好 正常人都该这样 |
| [10:50] | Look to the person next to you, | 望向站在你身旁的人 |
| [10:52] | and open the door to them with your eyes. | 用你的双眼 向他们打开心灵大门 |
| [10:55] | Bitch, that door is locked. | 小贱人 姐的那扇门关死了 |
| [11:00] | Nicely done. | 干得漂亮 |
| [11:02] | All right, everyone. | 好了 各位 |
| [11:03] | I’d like us to recite our mantra. | 跟我一起背诵我们的真言 |
| [11:06] | My best is my best, and that’s why I’m blessed. | 最佳自我在心中 上天保佑必不空 |
| [11:09] | My best is my best, | 最佳自我在心中 |
| [11:11] | and that’s why I’m blessed. | 上天保佑必不空 |
| [11:12] | Don’t mumble, Connie. | 别含糊不清 康妮 |
| [11:14] | My best is my best, | 最佳自我在心中 |
| [11:16] | and that’s why I’m blessed. | 上天保佑必不空 |
| [11:18] | Okay, it’s a cult. | 好吧 的确是邪教 |
| [11:20] | Little bit. | 有那么一点啦 |
| [11:23] | My best is my best… | 最佳自我在心中 |
| [11:28] | All right, everyone. | 好了 各位 |
| [11:29] | Let the sound of the bowls wash over you, | 让碗的声音洗涤你们 |
| [11:31] | cleansing you from head to toe | 净化全身 从头到脚 |
| [11:33] | and everywhere in-between. | 由外而内 |
| [11:36] | These bowls got their work cut out for them. | 这年头当个碗也不容易啊 |
| [11:40] | Everyone, close your eyes and quiet the mind, | 各位 请闭上眼 放空大脑 |
| [11:43] | and receive the healing vibrations. | 感受治愈的心灵震波 |
| [11:46] | Sound bathe us, Eugene. | 让我们沐浴在声音里吧 尤金 |
| [11:54] | When you feel called to join the bowls, | 当你们感知到碗的召唤 |
| [11:56] | begin with a soft… | 开始轻柔地… |
| [12:01] | I usually begin with a soft hummer. | 我一般是从轻柔地口交开始 |
| [12:07] | How are we gonna get out of this? | 我们要怎么摆脱这个… |
| [12:11] | Let’s just call it what it is: | 不如实事求是地叫它 |
| [12:13] | a cult. | 邪教 |
| [12:16] | I’m not going anywhere | 我哪儿也不去 |
| [12:20] | until I see what’s in those bowls. | 除非等我看了碗里有什么 |
| [12:25] | I’m hoping for fettuccini. | 我希望是意大利宽面 |
| [12:29] | I hope it’s not fettuccini | 我希望不是意大利宽面 |
| [12:32] | because I really don’t like cream-based sauces. | 因为我真的不喜欢奶油为主的酱料 |
| [12:36] | Do you mind? | 闭嘴行吗 |
| [12:37] | This is important for Lady Marmalade. | 这对果酱女郎很重要 |
| [12:39] | She has fibromyalgia. | 她有纤维肌痛症 |
| [12:43] | Fibromyalgia and seasonal depression? | 纤维肌痛症和季节性抑郁 |
| [12:46] | You really won the dog lottery. | 你这条算是头奖级的神犬啊 |
| [12:51] | All right, everyone. | 好了 各位 |
| [12:52] | You may gently bring your energy | 等你们准备好了 就可以 |
| [12:54] | back into the room | 缓缓将你们的能量 |
| [12:56] | whenever you feel ready. | 带回这间房间 |
| [13:02] | We got to get out of here. | 我们必须离开这里 |
| [13:03] | What are we gonna do? We’re in the middle of nowhere. | 我们该怎么办 这地方荒无人烟 |
| [13:05] | You know what would save the day right now? | 你知道啥能拯救我们于水深火热中吗 |
| [13:07] | Boober. | 奶步 |
| [13:11] | Caroline. | 卡洛琳 |
| [13:12] | Did anything come up for you during the sound bath? | 声音洗礼时 你有感受到什么吗 |
| [13:15] | A little bit of the chicken satay, but all good. | 感受到沙嗲鸡肉串反胃 但还好 |
| [13:19] | Max, how are you? | 麦克斯 你呢 |
| [13:20] | Were you touched at all? | 你有任何触动吗 |
| [13:22] | In high school, I was touched by an angel. | 在高中时 我被一位天使[触]摸过 |
| [13:26] | Well, technically, his name was… | 严格来说 他的名字叫 |
| [13:27] | Angel. | 天屎 |
| [13:30] | I know this probably all seems like a lot of hooey, | 我知道这一切看上去就像是胡说八道 |
| [13:33] | but I assure you you’ll wake up feeling refreshed. | 但我保证你们醒来会觉得神清气爽 |
| [13:36] | And Eugene makes a hell of a pancake breakfast. | 尤金做的煎饼早餐超级好吃 |
| [13:40] | He uses ricotta. | 他用的是意大利乳清奶酪哦 |
| [13:43] | We’re staying. | 我们必须留下 |
| [13:45] | I mean, ricotta? We gotta. | 乳清奶酪 汝请留下 |
| [13:48] | I guess so. | 那好吧 |
| [13:49] | It’ll be like staying at a B and B | 就像待在提供住宿和早餐的旅馆 |
| [13:51] | run by a lame Ron Hubbard. | 老板是无说服力版的科学神教教主 |
| [13:55] | Goodnight, everyone. | 晚安 各位 |
| [13:56] | Rachel has your room assignments. | 瑞秋已经把你们的房间安排好了 |
| [13:59] | Caroline, you’re sharing a room with me. | 卡洛琳 你跟我住一间 |
| [14:02] | Yay. | 好棒 |
| [14:03] | Max, you’re sharing a room with Topher and Lady Marmalade. | 麦克斯 你跟托福儿和果酱女郎住一间 |
| [14:15] | Can I ever get a good roommate? | 为啥我从来都捞不着好室友 |
| [14:18] | And do not fear. | 别害怕 |
| [14:20] | Before the night is over, each of you will have a chance | 黎明破晓前 你们每个人都有机会 |
| [14:23] | to make love with me. | 跟我做爱 |
| [14:28] | And the rest of the satay just came up. | 其余的鸡肉串也反上来了 |
| [14:31] | Before the sunrise, our moons will unite. | 日出之前 我们的月亮将会合一 |
| [14:37] | Well, I’m guessing her moon’s not waxed. | 我猜她的”月亮”肯定没除毛 |
| [14:42] | Caroline. | 卡洛琳 |
| [14:44] | Caroline. | 卡洛琳 |
| [14:45] | Caroline, where are you? | 卡洛琳 你在哪里 |
| [14:47] | Caroline? | 卡洛琳 |
| [14:52] | I thought you were gonna be Elaine… | 我还以为你是伊莱恩 |
| [14:54] | and I’m not drunk enough for that! | 我还不够醉 “干”不下去啊 |
| [14:57] | By the way, the piglet’s popping the snout out. | 对了 你的粉红猪把鼻头拱出来了 |
| [15:05] | Oh, I thought you were gonna be Elaine. | 我还以为你是伊莱恩 |
| [15:07] | And I thought I was gonna be dead at 14, | 我还以为我14岁时会死掉呢 |
| [15:09] | but you can’t always get what you want. | 但你总不可能事事顺心吧 |
| [15:12] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
| [15:14] | Max, oh, my God. Are you okay? | 麦克斯 天啊 你没事吧 |
| [15:16] | Please tell me Elaine didn’t get to you. | 拜托告诉我 伊莱恩没有对你下手 |
| [15:18] | I could never live with myself. | 否则我会没脸活下去 |
| [15:20] | Or you. | 或跟你住下去 |
| [15:24] | I’m sorry it took me so long to climax. | 抱歉我这么久才到达高潮 |
| [15:27] | I know I was almost there for quite some time. | 我知道我在高潮门前好一阵子才成功进去 |
| [15:31] | Max, Caroline, what are you doing out here? | 麦克斯 卡洛琳 你们俩在外面干嘛 |
| [15:35] | We were just anxiously awaiting | 我们迫切地等待 |
| [15:37] | intercourse with you. | 您的临幸 |
| [15:40] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [15:41] | ‘Cause unless that bag’s full of marital aids, | 因为除非那袋子装的全是情趣用具 |
| [15:43] | it looks like you’re trying to sneak out. | 否则你们看起来是想溜走 |
| [15:46] | Look, Elaine, | 听着 伊莱恩 |
| [15:47] | this is all a lot, and no offense, | 这一切我很难接受 无意冒犯 |
| [15:49] | but you can’t be the first person | 但我今年的第一炮 |
| [15:51] | I have sex with this year. | 对象不能是你 |
| [15:54] | I understand that you’re both feeling a little overwhelmed, | 我明白你们俩都觉得有点不知所措 |
| [15:57] | but before you go, why don’t we discuss this as a group | 但在你们走之前 我们何不以集体的形式 |
| [16:00] | in a healing way? | 疗愈般地讨论一下 |
| [16:01] | All right, Eugene, stay where you are. | 好的 尤金 待着别动 |
| [16:03] | You need some rest. | 你需要休息 |
| [16:04] | Maybe a little protein. | 或许需要补充蛋白质 |
| [16:12] | So you know what? We’re just gonna go. | 不如我们直接走吧 |
| [16:14] | You can tell that guy at the door | 你可以跟门口那人说 |
| [16:15] | he can just step aside so we can, | 让他让开 好让我们… |
| [16:17] | you know, start running. | 你懂的 飞奔离开 |
| [16:20] | Caroline, you are free to go at any time. | 卡洛琳 你们随时都可以走 |
| [16:23] | So we can go right now? | 那我们可以现在走吗 |
| [16:24] | No. | 不行 |
| [16:26] | Caroline, why don’t you sit here, and Rachel, | 卡洛琳 你何不坐这边 瑞秋 |
| [16:28] | bring Max over by the gong. | 把麦克斯带到锣那边 |
| [16:32] | Siri, remind me to patent a gong bong. | Siri 记得提醒我申请锣烟枪[音似]的专利 |
| [16:36] | Also remind me to get a phone with Siri. | 顺便提醒我弄个有Siri的手机 |
| [16:40] | Now, I know some of you have not yet laid with me tonight… | 我知道今晚还有人没能跟我上床 |
| [16:46] | But it’s come to my attention | 但我注意到 |
| [16:47] | that we have an N.N. in our midst. | 我们中间有一位NN |
| [16:50] | – What? – Who? | -什么 -是谁 |
| [16:51] | Quick Q on the N.N. | 问一下 什么是NN |
| [16:53] | Do either of those Ns stand for nachos? | 这个N是代表玉米脆片的意思吗 |
| [16:58] | N.N. stands for Negative Nelly. | NN代表的是”消极的奈利” |
| [17:00] | Negative Nancy was already trademarked | “消极的南希”已经被另一个抢注了 |
| [17:03] | by another group run by my ex-husband, Nancy. | 而那个团体的领导是我的前夫 南希 |
| [17:08] | Caroline, do you have any idea who this N.N. could be? | 卡洛琳 你知道这个NN可能会是”随”吗 |
| [17:12] | I believe it’s “whom” and no, I don’t. | 你是要问”谁”吗 我不知道 |
| [17:17] | Caroline, are you where you want to be in life? | 卡洛琳 你现在过着你想要的人生吗 |
| [17:19] | Oh, God, no. | 差了十万八千里 |
| [17:22] | And would you say there’s someone holding you back? | 你会觉得是因为某人在扯你后腿吗 |
| [17:27] | Well, I do feel like | 我的确是觉得 |
| [17:28] | hearing about Amy Schumer every day | 每天听女演员艾米·舒默的事 |
| [17:31] | makes me feel a little “less than.” | 有点让我感到无力 |
| [17:34] | Caroline, is there someone in this room | 卡洛琳 在这间屋子里的某人 |
| [17:37] | who you brought with brown hair | 就是你带来的那位棕发人士 |
| [17:41] | whose Negative Nelly-ness | 她的消极奈利气息 |
| [17:44] | is blocking you in ways you don’t even realize? | 是不是阻挡了你的前路而你不自知呢 |
| [17:48] | Wait a minute. | 等等 |
| [17:52] | I’m starting to think this is about me. | 我怎么开始感觉到是在说我 |
| [17:55] | Just having spent a few short hours with Max | 经过短短几小时与麦克斯的相处 |
| [17:58] | and recording all your conversations… | 并录下了你们所有的对话 |
| [18:03] | It’s pretty clear | 很显然 |
| [18:04] | that she is undermining your path to success | 她在你的成功道路上 |
| [18:06] | with her wisecracks and wordplay. | 用她的俏皮话与双关语在搞破坏 |
| [18:10] | Look. | 听我说 |
| [18:10] | Max might seem negative, because she is, | 麦克斯看起来可能很消极 她也的确是 |
| [18:15] | but you would be, too, if you were her. | 但如果你的人生像她一般 你也会消极 |
| [18:17] | She’s been neglected, rejected, | 她这一生被人忽视 拒之门外 |
| [18:19] | knocked down, and spat on. | 被人击倒 吐口水 |
| [18:21] | Some of that was consensual. | 其中某些是相互的 |
| [18:24] | See? That was positive. | 你看 这就很正面积极啊 |
| [18:27] | So you will give up all these potential connections | 所以你愿意放弃这一切潜在人脉 |
| [18:30] | just for her? | 就为了她一人吗 |
| [18:31] | Caroline, I used to live in Jersey City, | 卡洛琳 我曾经住在泽西城 |
| [18:34] | and now I live in a better part of New Jersey. | 而我现在搬到新泽西更好的地区了呢 |
| [18:39] | Elaine, I thought I needed to make new friends, | 伊莱恩 我本以为我需要交些新朋友 |
| [18:42] | and that’s how I wound up here, | 所以我才沦落到这里 |
| [18:43] | but turns out all I needed was Max. | 但原来 我只需要麦克斯一人 |
| [18:46] | I’ll take my chances with her. | 我愿意在她身上赌一把 |
| [18:48] | Huge mistake. | 天大的错误啊 |
| [18:49] | Huge. | 天大 |
| [18:52] | Well, then you’re free to go. | 那两位走吧 |
| [18:54] | Just need to settle up your bill. | 把账结了就行了 |
| [18:55] | This weekend is only free for friends. | 这周末派对只对朋友免费 |
| [18:58] | Rachel. | 瑞秋 |
| [19:00] | I ate $700 worth of shrimp? | 我吃了一只价值700块的虾吗 |
| [19:05] | That seems about right. | 感觉的确是差不多这个数 |
| [19:08] | We can’t pay that. | 我们不能付这个钱 |
| [19:09] | Is there a ship we can scrub? | 有船需要我们清理 |
| [19:12] | Or a gay celebrity we can marry? | 还是同志名人需要形婚的吗 |
| [19:16] | Don’t worry. I’ll settle up with Elaine. | 别担心 我来跟伊莱恩处理 |
| [19:18] | Do you accept nature’s credit card? | 你收上天恩赐的信用卡吗 |
| [19:24] | Get out. | 滚出去 |
| [19:32] | I can’t believe the only way I can make a friend | 真不敢相信我唯一能交到朋友的方法 |
| [19:34] | is to join a cult. | 是加入邪教 |
| [19:35] | Well, you made friends with me, and I’m not in a cult… | 你跟我交了朋友啊 我不是邪教中人 |
| [19:38] | anymore. | 已金盆洗手 |
| [19:40] | Max, are you and I gonna be like you and Becky someday? | 麦克斯 有一天我们也能像你跟贝姬那样吗 |
| [19:44] | Not unless one of us gets really, really, | 除非我们其中一人能变得超级超级 |
| [19:46] | I mean, so much cooler. | 是变得比现在酷炫超级多才行 |
| [19:48] | I’m serious. | 我是认真的 |
| [19:50] | Am I gonna be just some waitress you used to know? | 我会不会就只是你的某个服务员同事 |
| [19:53] | ‘Cause that would kill me. | 这样我会心碎的 |
| [19:55] | I don’t think of you that way at all. | 我从来不这样想你 |
| [19:58] | I mean as a waitress. | 我是指 你不够格当服务员 |
| [20:00] | Look, yes, Becky and I worked together, | 的确 我跟贝姬曾经是同事 |
| [20:02] | and yes, we had kind of a business dream, too, | 也的确 我们也曾一起有过一个创业梦想 |
| [20:04] | but you and I have so much more than that. | 但你和我所拥有的远远不止如此 |
| [20:06] | You and I are about to die in the woods. | 你跟我马上就要死在森林里了 |
| [20:08] | Look. | 你看 |
| [20:10] | We are getting in that car | 我们绝对要上这台车 |
| [20:11] | even if this guy has a hook for a hand. | 哪怕车主其中一只手是钩子 |
| [20:15] | Wazzup? | 还好咩 |
| [20:17] | Hey, girls. | 姑娘们 |
| [20:18] | I never thought I’d be happy to see Oleg | 我从没想过大晚上在阴暗的马路上 |
| [20:20] | on a dark road at night. | 见到奥列格会这么开心 |
| [20:22] | Sophie, what are you guys doing here? | 苏菲 你们俩在这里干嘛呢 |
| [20:25] | Oh, well, Max texted me her location. | 麦克斯把所在位置发给我了 |
| [20:27] | Said if I didn’t hear back from her, | 说如果她没有回复消息 |
| [20:30] | you’d been abducted by the cult and to come rescue you. | 就表示你们被邪教挟持 得来救你们 |
| [20:33] | I was in a cult once. | 我也曾入过魔教 |
| [20:35] | It’s called Avon. | 入过”雅芳”的魔 |
| [20:40] | So you were so certain I couldn’t make a normal friend | 所以你早早就确定我交不到普通朋友 |
| [20:44] | you had an escape plan? | 所以先安排好逃生计划吗 |
| [20:46] | Hey, sometimes my negativity pays off. | 有时候我”消极有好报”啊 |
| [20:48] | Sometimes it gets me in mall jail. | 而有时候则会害我被关进百货拘留所 |