| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Oleg, the people at Table Two | Oleg 二号桌的客人问 |
| [00:03] | want to know what’s in the veggie burger. | 蔬菜汉堡里都放了些什么 |
| [00:04] | No. They don’t. | 他们不会想知道的 |
| [00:11] | Eh. That’s fine. | 呃 没关系 |
| [00:12] | They wanted refills, so I’m probably not | 他们想要续杯 所以我大概 |
| [00:13] | gonna go back there anyway. | 不会再去那桌了 |
| [00:15] | Where’s Max? | Max呢? |
| [00:16] | This plate has been here so long, | 这盘菜已经放了很久了 |
| [00:18] | the salmon is turning into Salmonella. | 三文鱼都要变沙门菌了 |
| [00:22] | She took a break with the new dishwasher. | 她和新的洗碗工去休息了 |
| [00:26] | Max, I thought you slipped out the back. | Max 我以为你从后门溜出去了 |
| [00:29] | He did for a minute, but I popped him back in. | 他的确溜出了我的后门 但我把他塞回去了 |
| [00:37] | This just in, work is so much more fun | 我得说 和同事上床之后 |
| [00:39] | when you’re sleeping with a co-worker. | 工作就变得有趣多了 |
| [00:42] | Max, that was good. | Max 刚才太爽了 |
| [00:44] | It was five Hail Marys good. | 和连诵五遍圣母经一样爽 |
| [00:47] | I think we made these dishes dirtier. | 我觉得我们把盘子弄得更脏了 |
| [00:51] | Max, he’s cute, but how can you even stay hard with that accent? | Max 他的确可爱 但对着那口音 你怎么硬得起来? |
| [00:56] | “Come here, Max. I wanna hump ya a wee bit”. | “过来 Max 我要和你嘿咻一把” |
| [01:03] | What can I say, I always had a thing | 只能说 我一向很喜欢 |
| [01:05] | for the guy on the box of Lucky Charms. | 幸运符麦片盒子上的男孩子 |
| [01:25] | Hey, everybody. | 大家好 |
| [01:29] | Look, I got me a Fitbit. | 瞧 我买了个运动腕带 |
| [01:33] | 13, 14, 15… | 十三 十四 十五… |
| [01:37] | Only 200,000 more steps before I get a bit more fit | 再走二十万步 我就能在婚礼上 |
| [01:41] | for my wedding. | 显得苗条一点 |
| [01:43] | That’s impressive. | 真厉害 |
| [01:44] | I couldn’t even make it through 12 steps. | 我连十二步都走不了 |
| [01:49] | Hey, Max. | 嘿 Max |
| [01:50] | How’s my maid of honor? | 我的伴娘今天好吗? |
| [01:52] | Hey, Caroline. | 嘿 Caroline |
| [01:54] | How’s my run-of-the-mill wedding guest? | 我毫不出众的婚礼嘉宾今天好吗? |
| [01:59] | I’m doing great. Did that sound convincing? | 我很好 你信吗? |
| [02:02] | ‘Cause I’ve been practicing it in the bathroom mirror | 因为我每天早上都要在浴室镜子前 |
| [02:03] | for an hour every morning. | 练习这句话一个小时 |
| [02:05] | I know, I’ve got to stop sitting on the toilet | 我知道 因为你一练习 |
| [02:07] | while you do that. | 我就得从马桶上起来 |
| [02:09] | Max, let’s talk bridesmaid dresses. | Max 我们商量下伴娘裙的事 |
| [02:12] | I don’t care, I’ll wear anything. | 我无所谓 穿什么都可以 |
| [02:14] | I wore a Greyhound Bus driver’s uniform to my prom. | 我穿了件灰狗长途车司机的制服去参加的毕业舞会 |
| [02:18] | I was coming straight from work. | 因为我是下班直接过去的 |
| [02:20] | Well, I have decided to wear | 我决定穿 |
| [02:23] | Grandma Kuchenski’s wedding gown. | 祖母的结婚礼服 |
| [02:26] | Yeah, all of the women in my family wore it. | 我家所有女人都穿那件出嫁的 |
| [02:29] | Everyone except aunts Svetti and Letti, | 除了Svetti和Letti阿姨 |
| [02:31] | ’cause, well, they’re attached at the abdomen. | 因为她们是连体儿 |
| [02:36] | There she is. | 你来了 |
| [02:37] | The hot sauce for my Huevos Mancheros. | 让我男式火腿更添味道的宝贝 |
| [02:46] | Hey, Sophie, baby, I got you what you want. | 嘿 Sophie宝贝 我弄到你想要的东西了 |
| [02:48] | Oleg, no one wants Hepatitis. | Oleg 没人想要肝炎病菌 |
| [02:53] | It’s official. | 定下了 |
| [02:54] | Our wedding’s gonna be in The Times. | 我们的婚礼会被登上纽约时报 |
| [02:57] | Oleg, how are you gonna be in The Times? | Oleg 你怎么可能上纽约时报? |
| [03:00] | The Times tends to be picky | 纽约时报很挑剔的 |
| [03:01] | and you tend to be more “picky your nose.” | 而且你只喜欢挖鼻孔 |
| [03:04] | You know, my second wedding made The Times. | 要知道 我的第二次婚礼就上了纽约时报 |
| [03:09] | ‘Cause my first wife showed up and shot me in the leg. | 因为我的第一任妻子朝我的腿开了一枪 |
| [03:16] | That’s Vlanka, my sister. | 是我妹妹Vlanka发来的 |
| [03:18] | She’s my other bridesmaid. | 她是另一个伴娘 |
| [03:21] | Yeah, we’re not that close, but I feel bad for her | 我们的确关系不亲密 但我很同情她 |
| [03:25] | ’cause she’s one of those adults with freckles. | 因为她长大了 脸上还是有雀斑 |
| [03:31] | Max, you’re going to be in The Times! | Max 你要上纽约时报了! |
| [03:34] | In The Times, wearing God knows what Sophie will pick. | 但得穿Sophie挑的衣服上纽约时报 |
| [03:38] | I mean, she has a drawer full of diamond tiaras for the gym. | 我是说 她有一抽屉健身时候戴的钻石冠冕 |
| [03:45] | Hello, what are you two talking about? | 嘿 你们俩在聊什么? |
| [03:47] | Deciding which tables to ignore? | 决定忽略哪几桌的客人吗? |
| [03:50] | We’re talking about Sophie’s taste. | 我们在说Sophie的品味 |
| [03:52] | Oh, bitch, please. Come on. | 两位毒舌婊 拜托 |
| [03:57] | My morning fiber cookie has better taste than Sophie. | 我的早餐纤维曲奇都好过Sophie |
| [04:02] | Girls, Vlanka’s out. | 姑娘们 Vlanka下岗了 |
| [04:05] | She has an attitude and freckles. | 她在闹情绪 脸上还有雀斑 |
| [04:07] | Yeah. I mean, that’s too far. | 我知道 这些八竿子打不着 |
| [04:11] | So, Caroline, congratulations! | 所以 恭喜Caroline! |
| [04:15] | You’re my new bridesmaid! | 你是我的新伴娘! |
| [04:24] | Okay, I found a bridesmaid’s dress that I like. | 好了 我找到条喜欢的伴娘裙 |
| [04:27] | But the only way we can afford it is if I sell you | 但要想买得起 我只能把你卖给 |
| [04:28] | to that Armenian guy on Craigslist. | 分类广告网上的那个亚美尼亚人 |
| [04:32] | No way. | 没门 |
| [04:33] | I get sick of hummus after four bites. | 我最多只能吃四口鹰嘴豆泥 |
| [04:35] | Max, we have to take charge of this. | Max 我们得掌控局面 |
| [04:38] | Because whatever bridesmaid’s dress Sophie picks | 因为无论Sophie挑怎样的伴娘裙 |
| [04:40] | is like a Tyler Perry movie. | 都会像泰勒·派瑞演的电影里的 |
| [04:40] | 泰勒·派瑞: 美国演员 导演 编剧 | |
| [04:41] | I don’t have to see it to know it’s gonna be awful. | 我不用看都知道肯定很糟糕 |
| [04:48] | We’ll find something classy, and beautiful, | 我们得找些经典漂亮的裙子 |
| [04:50] | and just shove it down her throat. | 然后直接塞给她 |
| [04:52] | Who’s shoving what down whom? | 是谁要给谁塞什么呀? |
| [04:57] | And if you don’t have a story, I do. | 如果你们没经历 我有哦 |
| [05:02] | John, Max and I got roped into being bridesmaids. | John 我和Max被绑去当伴娘了 |
| [05:05] | Stop. | 别说了 |
| [05:06] | You had me at rope. | 捆绑我喜欢 |
| [05:07] | You lost me at bridesmaids. | 但我不喜欢伴娘 |
| [05:10] | I’ll be at the hostess stand, looking at dresses | 我去前台站着看礼服了 |
| [05:12] | and silently wishing for an asteroid | 然后默默希望有颗小行星 |
| [05:14] | to wipe us off the planet. | 能把我们从地球上抹去 |
| [05:16] | If wishes made things happen, we’d been in the middle | 如果希望都能成真 那我们现在 |
| [05:18] | of a zombie apocalypse right now. | 就会被一群僵尸围着了 |
| [05:22] | Hey, girls. | 姑娘们好 |
| [05:24] | My dress just arrived from Poland | 我的礼服从波兰送过来了 |
| [05:25] | and I’m bustin’ for you to see it. | 我很想让你们看看 |
| [05:28] | See it while I eat one of your $14 puddings. | 你们慢慢看 我在一边吃个十四刀的布丁 |
| [05:32] | Sophie, I’ve been looking at color choices, | Sophie 我考虑了一下伴娘服的颜色 |
| [05:34] | and how would you feel about us in a nude? | 你觉得我们穿裸色的伴娘裙如何? |
| [05:37] | Max could go nude but you don’t have the rack to pull it off. | Max裸着还行 可是你没什么好裸的啊 |
| [05:43] | Does anyone have a knife? | 有人有刀吗? |
| [05:49] | Max, why do you have a switchblade | Max 你在甜品站工作 |
| [05:50] | to work in a dessert bar? | 带着把弹簧刀干什么? |
| [05:52] | My mother always told me to carry protection. | 我妈一直教育我说要做好保护措施 |
| [05:57] | Wait till you see Grandma Kuchenski’s dress. | 等着看Kuchenski祖母的婚纱吧 |
| [06:00] | They don’t make them like they used to. | 虽然做工也许大不如前了 |
| [06:02] | You know, forced gypsy labor is illegal now. | 你懂的 现在强迫吉普赛劳工干活是违法的 |
| [06:07] | Here we go. | 好了 瞧 |
| [06:12] | – Oh. – Uh… | – 呕 – 额… |
| [06:14] | Sophie, was your grandma the Crypt Keeper? | Sophie 你祖母是看守地窖的吗? |
| [06:21] | What’s going on out here? | 这里什么发生了什么? |
| [06:23] | What’s all that white powder in the air? | 空中飘着这么多白色粉末是什么情况? |
| [06:25] | I’m trying to run a restaurant, not an 80’s disco. | 我开的是餐厅 不是80年代的迪厅 |
| [06:29] | Oh, put a sock in it. | 哦 闭上你的嘴吧 |
| [06:31] | I’m buying one of your freaking overpriced puddings. | 我可是消费了你那迷之昂贵的糕点的 |
| [06:38] | I’d get mad but I’m mildly attracted to you right now. | 我本该生气 但我现在有点儿喜欢你了 |
| [06:42] | Just mildly? | 才一点点? |
| [06:45] | I mean, now I’m getting mad. | 老娘这下生气了 |
| [06:49] | Sorry. Wedding drama. | 对不起 都是婚礼惹的祸 |
| [06:51] | Her dress just fell completely to pieces… | 她的婚纱刚刚碎成一片片的… |
| [06:53] | like I’m assuming I’ll do in the near future. | 就像我预想着未来的自己也支离破碎 |
| [06:56] | Whatever you need bridal, | 任何跟婚礼有关的东西 |
| [06:58] | go to Rosenfeld’s in Brooklyn. | 都能在布鲁克林的那家婚 |
| [07:00] | That’s where I got my dress when I was broke and straight. | 在我破产又喜欢男人的时候就在那里买的婚纱 |
| [07:04] | So you weren’t always into women? | 所以说你不是一直喜欢女人的吗? |
| [07:06] | Of course I was. | 我当然一直喜欢的女人 |
| [07:08] | Except those three years in Scientology. | 除了在我信奉科学教的那三年 |
| [07:14] | Well, it looks like the three of us | 好吧 看来我们三个 |
| [07:16] | are going to go dress shopping now. | 要一起去淘点伴娘裙了 |
| [07:19] | Yeah. And you know, I got to go wash my hands | 哦 我必须要先去洗个手 |
| [07:22] | ’cause they’re covered in old lady DNA. | 它们上面沾满了老女人的死皮 |
| [07:28] | Well, that’s that. | 好吧 就这样咯 |
| [07:31] | Shopping with Sophie is like when I worked | 和Sophie一起购物 就像是我之前 |
| [07:32] | in a Thai massage parlor. | 在泰式按摩店工作那样 |
| [07:34] | We are going down. | 我们要完蛋了 |
| [07:41] | Not if we go before Sophie | 除非我们比Sophie先去那家店 |
| [07:43] | and hide every ugly bridesmaid’s dress that Sophie would like. | 把所有她会看上的难看伴娘裙都藏起来 |
| [07:47] | If she can’t see them, she can’t make us wear them. | 只要别让她看到 她就不会让咱们穿了 |
| [07:50] | How did you come up with that so fast? | 你脑子怎么转得这么快? |
| [07:51] | It’s the same plan I used in 2010 | 当我2010年为切尔西·克林顿(前总统克林顿女儿) |
| [07:54] | when I was a bridesmaid for Chelsea Clinton. | 当伴娘的时候用的也是这招 |
| [07:56] | Bad dress and then her father followed me into the coat room. | 难看的伴娘裙 然后她爸还尾随我进了更衣室 |
| [08:03] | Oh, wow. | 哦 哇哦 |
| [08:05] | Look at this place. | 瞧瞧这里 |
| [08:06] | It reminds me of that movie. | 它让我想起了一部电影 |
| [08:08] | – Bridesmaids? – No, Nightmare on Elm Street. | – 是”伴娘”吗? – 不是 是”猛鬼街” |
| [08:12] | I don’t know what you’re worried about, Caroline. | Caroline我实在不知道你有什么可担心的 |
| [08:14] | I think they’re all quite lovely. | 我觉得这些婚纱挺漂亮的 |
| [08:16] | Nash, please. | Nash 拜托 |
| [08:17] | You’re a poor person from Ireland. | 你就是一爱尔兰穷小子 |
| [08:21] | I’ll ask your opinion when I need to know where to go | 等我想要申请免费的腿支架时 |
| [08:23] | to get free leg braces. | 我会向你咨询 |
| [08:27] | You were right, Max. | 你是对的 Max |
| [08:29] | She can be a real “B” sometimes. | 她有时候确实挺贱的 |
| [08:32] | I’m sorry, but I don’t even know why he’s here. | 抱歉 但我真不知道他为啥也跟着来 |
| [08:35] | Bonin’ O’Brien here… | 这位山寨版的奥伯里恩 |
| [08:40] | is gonna distract the sales lady | 能够帮我们拖住那些女销售 |
| [08:42] | while we hide the ugly dresses. | 好让我们去把难看的伴娘裙藏起来 |
| [08:45] | Hello, ladies. | 你们好 女士们 |
| [08:47] | Same plan. | 计划不变 |
| [08:50] | Who’s the lucky bride? | 哪位是幸运的新娘? |
| [08:51] | Or should I say, who’s the lucky cradle robber? | 或许我该说 哪位有幸地吃到小鲜肉了? |
| [08:56] | Don’t mind me. | 别管我 |
| [08:58] | It’s just my crazy sense of humor. | 我的幽默感太澎湃了 |
| [08:59] | Oh, the ladies here love it. | 这里的女士们都爱死我的幽默感 |
| [09:01] | The call me “Crazy Carl.” | 她们管我叫”狂野Carl” |
| [09:03] | “Did you hear what Crazy Carl said?” | “你刚听到狂野Carl说什么了吗?” |
| [09:07] | They just love it. | 她们就是爱死我了 |
| [09:10] | I’m Caroline. | 我是Caroline |
| [09:11] | This is Max and he isn’t the groom. | 这是Max 而他不是新郎 |
| [09:13] | No, no, no. | 没错 |
| [09:14] | He’s single and gay. Yes. | 他是一个单身同性恋 |
| [09:17] | So gay, he got kicked out of One Direction. | 太弯了 以至于他被单向组合乐队给踢了出来 |
| [09:25] | Why don’t you two walk off somewhere | 你们俩何不出去走走 |
| [09:27] | and share poignant coming-out stories. | 聊聊辛酸的出柜史呢 |
| [09:30] | Go. | 快去 |
| [09:32] | – But Max… – Oh, you heard the women, go. | – 但是Max… – 哦 听话 快去吧 |
| [09:35] | Can do. | 倒也可以 |
| [09:36] | Ladies, look around, we’ll be back… | 女士们 你们随便看看 我们… |
| [09:39] | in about a month. | 一个月后回来 |
| [09:41] | Tahiti anyone? | 有人想去大溪地度假吗 |
| [09:43] | I’m just Crazy Carl. | 我就是如此疯狂的Carl |
| [09:44] | The ladies love it. | 女士们爱死我了 |
| [09:47] | Bridesmaid’s dresses should be called what they are. | 好的伴娘服就该有伴娘服的样子 |
| [09:49] | Really expensive donations to Goodwill. | 捐给慈善机构的昂贵捐赠啊 |
| [09:53] | Is this one bad? | 这件丑吗? |
| [09:55] | No. That’s a Vera Wang. | 开玩笑 这件可是国际名牌 |
| [09:57] | But this is a very wrong. | 但是这件 绝对不行 |
| [10:01] | Hide it. | 藏起来 |
| [10:03] | Ew. And it’s evil twin. | 咦 还有一个一样丑的姐妹装 |
| [10:07] | Oh, I didn’t know Hazmat suits came with feathers. | 哦 居然还有带着羽毛的救生衣 |
| [10:13] | Oh my God. | 天啊 |
| [10:16] | This the worst thing I’ve ever seen. | 这是我见过的最可怕的东西了 |
| [10:19] | And I’ve seen a prostitute change her tampon | 我甚至见过一个妓女在人行道上 |
| [10:21] | on the sidewalk. | 换卫生棉 |
| [10:23] | Who are you calling a prostitute? | 你叫谁妓女呢? |
| [10:32] | This, we’ve got to hide. | 快 我们一定得把这件藏起来 |
| [10:34] | I can’t get this dress off. | 我脱不下来 |
| [10:36] | Just tell it you work at Google | 只要跟她说 你在谷歌工作 |
| [10:37] | and you’re thinking of settling down. | 而且你想定居下来 就会有人帮你脱衣服了 |
| [10:39] | Lift it up. Lift it up. Dump it back there. | 抬起来 抬起来啊 把她丢进去 |
| [10:42] | Stop! | 住手! |
| [10:44] | You put Butterscotch Betty down. | 把可爱的黄油贝蒂放下来 |
| [10:47] | Oh, we were just looking for a price tag. | 哦 我们只是在找价格标签 |
| [10:50] | I know what’s going on here. | 我知道你们在干什么 |
| [10:52] | You’re hiding the good dresses | 你们想把漂亮衣服藏起来 |
| [10:54] | to make sure no one else can get them | 让别人找不到 好等到我们明天 |
| [10:55] | at our annual half-off sale tomorrow. | 年度半价活动之时来抢购 |
| [10:58] | Yeah, that’s what we’re doing. | 没错 我们就是这么打算的 |
| [10:59] | We’re hiding the good dresses. | 我们要把漂亮衣服藏起来 |
| [11:02] | In fact, I just caught another Sneaky Sue. | 其实 我刚还抓到另一个人也是这样 |
| [11:05] | Oh, I’m Sophie. | 哦 就是我 Sophie |
| [11:09] | Oh, wow, wow, wow. | 哦 哇 哇 哇 |
| [11:15] | Oh, look at the color. | 哦 看看这个颜色 |
| [11:19] | That’s not color. That’s radiation. | 那不是颜色 那是辐射 |
| [11:22] | That dress is a one of a kind. | 这件裙子是独一无二的 |
| [11:25] | Meaning there’s only one? | 就是说 只有一件? |
| [11:26] | No, we have two. | 不 我们有两件 |
| [11:28] | And I have two bridesmaids! | 我正好有两个伴娘! |
| [11:32] | I love it when life works out perfect like this. | 生活如此完美 我真是太开心了 |
| [11:48] | Look at this place. | 看看这个地方吧 |
| [11:50] | There are more desperate women crammed in here | 这么多绝望的女人挤在这 |
| [11:51] | than the splash zone at a Kenny Chesney concert. | 比肯尼·切斯尼演唱会飞溅区的人还要多 |
| [11:55] | I know. It’s like Black Friday at Walmart | 没错 就跟沃尔玛的黑色星期五一样 |
| [11:58] | And like Black Friday, hopefully someone will trample me. | 我宁肯在踩踏事件中丧生 |
| [12:02] | Cause thanks to these dresses, my life is over. | 多亏了那些裙子 我的人生就这么完蛋了 |
| [12:06] | Max, did you hear me? | Max 你在听我说话吗? |
| [12:08] | My life is over. | 我的人生完蛋了 |
| [12:09] | You said that when the Chinese food place | 那次中国餐厅忘了给你鸭酱 |
| [12:11] | forgot the duck sauce. | 你就是这么说的 |
| [12:13] | Well, I’m sorry, but I had a whole other scenario planned | 好吧 对不起 我只是想以一个全新的形象 |
| [12:16] | for my return to The Times. | 重返时代杂志 |
| [12:18] | “Entrepreneur rises from the ashes.” | “重振旗鼓的女强人” |
| [12:21] | Now, I’m just going to be in The Times, | 可现在 我只能像小丑一样 |
| [12:22] | looking like a stupid ash. | 出现在杂志里 |
| [12:25] | Shoot, girl, just push on through. | 往前挤啊 大姐 给点力啊 |
| [12:27] | I’m pushing, girl. I am pushing. | 我正在挤呢 我在挤啊 |
| [12:29] | Excuse us. | 借过 |
| [12:30] | Excuse us. | 借过 |
| [12:32] | Excuse us. | 借过 |
| [12:34] | Just go, girl. | 往前走啊 大姐 |
| [12:35] | I don’t want anybody else to get those | 我可不想别人把那两件 |
| [12:37] | two yellow dresses. | 黄色裙子抢走 |
| [12:39] | Max, did you hear that? | Max 你听见了吗? |
| [12:42] | Someone has worst taste than Sophie. | 有人比Sophie的品味还差 |
| [12:47] | Now we just have to hang back here | 我们躲到她们后面去 |
| [12:48] | and let them get to those dresses first. | 让她们先把裙子买了 |
| [12:50] | Yay! My life is good again. | 耶! 我的人生又重见天日了 |
| [12:52] | Max, Caroline, up here. | Max Caroline 这里 |
| [12:57] | What was that, like, a second? | 什么 只让我开心一秒吗? |
| [12:59] | I saved you a space upfront. | 我给你们占位子了 |
| [13:02] | Come on. | 快过来 |
| [13:04] | Well, it’s over. | 好吧 看来没希望了 |
| [13:05] | As soon as they cut that ribbon, | 一旦他们剪下缎带 开始营业 |
| [13:07] | Sophie’s going to Marshawn Lynch everyone who | Sophie就要把任何挡在我们和 |
| [13:09] | gets in the way of us and those dresses. | 黄色裙子中间的人给撂倒了 |
| [13:11] | There’s only one way out of this. | 只有一个办法 |
| [13:12] | And you called it earlier. | 就是你刚才提到的 |
| [13:14] | You have to let them trample you. | 你得制造一起踩踏事件 |
| [13:17] | I’m serious. | 我是认真的 |
| [13:18] | I’m not about to be trampled on purpose. | 我才不要故意摔倒被人踩呢 |
| [13:21] | See if you still feel that way | 如果听见下面这些话 |
| [13:23] | after I say these next few words: | 你会做何感想 |
| [13:25] | “Pictured from left, Caroline Channing.” | “图中左一 Caroline Channing” |
| [13:27] | Try to fend off any heels you see heading for my eyes. | 把那些试图往我眼睛上踩的高跟鞋推开 |
| [13:32] | Attention, ladies. | 注意了 女士们 |
| [13:33] | As you see, I have the big scissors, | 如你们所见 我手上有一把大剪刀 |
| [13:36] | which can only mean it’s time… | 也就意味着 是时候… |
| [13:39] | to trim some nose hairs! | 剪鼻毛啦! |
| [13:43] | That Carl is crazy. | 真是疯狂的Carl |
| [13:47] | The annual bridal sale… | 年度婚纱特价销售活动… |
| [13:49] | – is now… – Max, hold my hand. | – 现在… – Max 抓住我的手 |
| [13:51] | Open! | 开幕! |
| [13:57] | Ladies, ladies, one at a time. | 女士们 女士们 一次一件 |
| [14:00] | Oh! | 哦! |
| [14:03] | Well, I may be limping down the aisle, | 虽然我是蹒跚着走完过道的 |
| [14:05] | but at least I won’t be limping in something Swiffer might sell | 但至少我不是在速易洁清洁公司卖的 |
| [14:08] | to dust off ceiling fans. | 吊扇除尘器下走过 |
| [14:13] | Oh, my God, girl! here she comes! | 天啊! 她来了! |
| [14:15] | Here she comes. | 她来了 |
| [14:19] | My girl, Rhonda, had that dress first. | 我朋友Rhonda 她先拿到裙子的 |
| [14:21] | Oh, your girl is gonna have to | 哦 你们必须 |
| [14:22] | pry it out of my cold, dead hands. | 从我冰冷的死亡之手里把它撬出来 |
| [14:25] | Hey, Max, Caroline! | 嘿 Max Caroline! |
| [14:26] | Try it on! Try it on! | 试穿它! 试穿它! |
| [14:31] | Follow me to the changing room. | 请跟我来更衣室 |
| [14:49] | I’m never coming out in this dress, I’m scared. | 我不要穿着这条裙子出去 我害怕 |
| [14:53] | So on the count of one, two… | 我数 一 二… |
| [15:00] | Maybe it’s not that bad. | 也许没那么糟 |
| [15:06] | It’s bad. | 很糟 |
| [15:10] | Okay. So you’re telling me, | 好吧 告诉我 |
| [15:12] | Versace got murdered, | 范哲思被杀了 |
| [15:12] | 范哲思，1978年创立Versace奢侈品牌，1998年被黑社会谋杀 | |
| [15:14] | but no one’s taken out whoever made these? | 却没有人把设计这衣服的人杀了? |
| [15:17] | I know. | 我懂 |
| [15:19] | I feel like Tweety Bird is gonna sue us | 我感觉翠迪鸟要起诉我们 |
| [15:19] | 黄色小鸟的卡通形象，由华纳出品 | |
| [15:21] | for copyright infringement. | 侵权了啊 |
| [15:24] | I feel like we should have giant toilet paper rolls under here. | 我感觉我们应该在下面放巨型的厕所卷纸 |
| [15:29] | Well, maybe we’ll like these better | 也许没有这强光之后 |
| [15:31] | when we’re out of this bright light. | 我们会更喜欢这衣服 |
| [15:32] | Max, we are the bright light. | Max 这强光就是我们自己 |
| [15:36] | Ladies, you forgot the matching hats. | 女士们 你们把配套的帽子给忘了 |
| [15:41] | There’s more? | 还有吗? |
| [15:44] | Oh, if anyone finds a Xanax, it’s mine. | 对了 要是有人发现一片赞安诺 那是我的 |
| [15:44] | 赞安诺一般用于治疗焦虑和失眠 | |
| [15:48] | It was knocked out of my hand by two women duking it out | 两个女人争夺一条印花鱼尾裙时 |
| [15:50] | over a chintz mermaid dress. | 药片在我手里被撞掉了 |
| [15:55] | Oh, now it looks good. | 哦 现在好看了 |
| [16:02] | There’s Xanax on the loose and I’m just standing here? | 赞安诺在外逍遥 我却站在这里? |
| [16:06] | At least if I was high, I’d have an excuse to be wearing this. | 除了我磕高了 我才有理由穿这种衣服 |
| [16:10] | Here pilly, pilly. | 药啊 药啊 到这儿来 |
| [16:12] | Here pilly, pilly, pilly. | 药啊 药啊 到这儿来 |
| [16:16] | Girl, for real, you look like straight up crap | 妹子 说真的 你们穿上这裙子 |
| [16:19] | in that dress. | 真是烂透了 |
| [16:21] | For real. | 真的 |
| [16:22] | You white girls can’t pull that color off. | 你们白人女孩撑不起这种颜色 |
| [16:24] | That’s a waste of poppin’ lemon yellow. | 真是浪费了耀眼的柠檬黄 |
| [16:27] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [16:28] | I am way too white for this. | 我太白了 不能穿这个 |
| [16:31] | She’s also too white to say “turnt up” all the time, | 她也因为太白了而无法一直学黑人说”畅饮” |
| [16:34] | but that hasn’t stopped her. | 但她还是会说 |
| [16:36] | This dress was not my choice. | 这条裙子不是我选的 |
| [16:39] | I hate everything about it. | 我一点也不喜欢它 |
| [16:40] | This is a disaster. | 这就是个灾难 |
| [16:41] | This is “Dressageddon.” | 这就是”末日裙子” |
| [16:43] | Yeah, but in a good way. | 对 但这是褒义 |
| [16:46] | You two don’t want to wear the dresses. | 你们俩不想穿这条裙子 |
| [16:49] | You don’t have to. | 你们不一定要穿 |
| [16:51] | But I thought you wanted us to match | 可我以为你想要我们 |
| [16:53] | the balloons and the ducks. | 跟气球和鸭子搭配 |
| [16:57] | Max, she said we don’t have to wear the dress. | Max 她说我们不必穿这裙子 |
| [16:59] | Don’t question her! | 别质疑她! |
| [17:01] | That’s like questioning a prison guard | 就像在监狱的守卫说你可以走了时 |
| [17:02] | when he says you’re free to go. | 你却在质疑他一样 |
| [17:06] | Sophie, are you sure you don’t care? | Sophie 你确定你不介意吗? |
| [17:08] | Oh, yeah. Sure. | 是啊 当然 |
| [17:11] | Yeah, they’re all yours, Destiny’s Child. | 裙子是你们的了 命运的宠儿 |
| [17:25] | This is ten pounds of ugly junk. | 这丑陋的垃圾货有十磅重 |
| [17:28] | Reminds me of this bartender, Pete, I used to date. | 让我想起我曾经约会过的酒保Pete |
| [17:32] | Come to think of it, that made me gag, too. | 仔细想想 那也把我噎住了 |
| [17:36] | Okay. Done. | 好了 搞定 |
| [17:40] | Listen, crying in a women’s dressing room? | 你听 女更衣室里有哭声? |
| [17:44] | Whoever it is, girl, big butts are in. | 不管你是谁 姑娘 知心大妈来了 |
| [17:51] | That’s Sophie’s cry. | 那是Sophie的哭声 |
| [17:52] | I know, ’cause I hear it through the vent | 我知道 是因为她在看”下一站歌后”时 |
| [17:55] | when she watches Nashville. | 我从通风口听到过 |
| [17:58] | Sophie? | Sophie 是你吗? |
| [18:01] | No. | 不是 |
| [18:04] | Are you okay? | 你还好吗? |
| [18:06] | It’s not me, but I’m okay. | 不是我 但我没事 |
| [18:15] | Sophie, why are you crying? | Sophie 你为什么哭? |
| [18:17] | When I heard what you said about the dresses… | 我听到你们对那裙子的评论时… |
| [18:21] | It’s just… | 只是… |
| [18:24] | It’s almost, kind of like, | 就是 有点像是 |
| [18:27] | you think I have bad taste or something. | 你们觉得我品味很差之类的 |
| [18:30] | No. | 不 |
| [18:35] | Caroline thinks you have great taste. | Caroline觉得你品味很棒 |
| [18:39] | She does? | 是吗? |
| [18:43] | Well, then she should say so. | 那她就应该这样说啊 |
| [18:46] | Now. | 马上 |
| [18:52] | Well, Sophie, I think you have your own unique style. | Sophie 我觉得你有自己独特的风格 |
| [18:56] | And I think… | 我觉得… |
| [18:59] | that I didn’t hear the words “great” or “taste.” | 我没有听见”很好”或者”品味”这些词 |
| [19:04] | Sophie, what do you even care what I think? | Sophie 你介意我的想法干嘛? |
| [19:06] | Just say it! | 你就直说吧! |
| [19:07] | Sophie, I think you have great taste. | Sophie 我觉得你品味很好 |
| [19:14] | You do? | 真的吗? |
| [19:21] | Then, what are we doing sitting here? | 那我们还坐在这儿干嘛? |
| [19:24] | Let’s go and get those dresses back! | 我们去把裙子拿回来! |
| [19:27] | Come on. Help me! | 快 帮我! |
| [19:34] | Those other girls already took them. | 裙子已经被别的姑娘拿走了 |
| [19:37] | What? | 什么? |
| [19:44] | Well, at least we don’t have to wear those ugly, | 至少我们不用再婚礼上穿着 |
| [19:46] | yellow bridesmaid dresses at the wedding. | 那些难看的黄色伴娘裙了 |
| [19:48] | Yup. Now, you only have to wear | 是啊 现在 你只需要 |
| [19:50] | ugly, yellow dresses here, every night. | 每晚在这里穿难看的黄色裙子 |
| [19:53] | This is the best thing that’s happened to me | 自从我意识到我手臂上的怪痣 |
| [19:55] | since I realized that weird mole on my arm was just a Grape-Nut | 是葡萄果仁麦片 而不是癌症 |
| [19:57] | and not cancer. | 这是我遇到最好的事了 |
| [20:00] | Girls, great news. | 姑娘们 好消息 |
| [20:01] | You stuffed Han in the microwave | 你们把Han塞进了微波炉 |
| [20:03] | and you’re ready to hit power? | 现在准备插电了吗? |
| [20:04] | Come on. We’ve tried. | 拜托 我们试过了 |
| [20:06] | You know he doesn’t fit. | 你知道他进不去的 |
| [20:08] | The one thing he’s too big for. | 这是唯一让他显得体积太大的东西 |
| [20:10] | No, I got Ilia Jorbich to be our wedding photographer. | 不 我请了Ilia Jorbich来当我们的婚礼摄影师 |
| [20:14] | He’s the best photographer at The Warsaw Times. | 他是华沙时报最好的摄影师 |
| [20:17] | Well, he’s the only one who still has both arms. | 也是唯一还有两条手臂的人 |
| [20:21] | Wait, it’s the Warsaw Times? | 等等 是华沙时报吗? |
| [20:24] | All this time, I’ve been thinking | 这么久以来 我一直以为是 |
| [20:25] | it was The New York Times. | 纽约时报 |
| [20:27] | New York Times? | 纽约时报? |
| [20:29] | This is much more exclusive. | 我这个更加独家好吗 |
| [20:30] | You can only get it in two places. | 你只能在两个地方找到它 |
| [20:32] | Poland and the deli in New Jersey that sells missiles. | 波兰以及新泽西州卖导弹的熟食店 |
| [20:36] | This is amazing. | 太不可思议了 |
| [20:37] | My comeback in The New York Times | 我在纽约时报的复出 |
| [20:39] | has been preserved. | 被保存下来了 |
| [20:41] | Max, I’m gonna go ahead and smile. | Max 我要微笑着继续前进 |
| [20:43] | My life is good again. | 我的生活又美好了 |
| [20:45] | Don’t smile yet, ’cause Sophie told me | 先别笑 因为Sophie跟我说 |
| [20:47] | that because you said she had such good taste, | 因为你说她品味很好 |
| [20:49] | she’s designing our dresses herself. | 她正亲自设计我们的裙子 |
| [20:51] | What was that, like a second? | 什么 只能开心一秒钟? |
| [20:54] | Yup. You just went from the best of times | 是的 你刚刚从最好的时报 |
| [20:57] | to The Warsaw Times. | 走到了华沙时报 |