| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Max, thanks for agreeing to get in the spirit | Max 谢谢你愿意融入圣诞气氛 |
| [00:05] | and do holiday cupcakes. | 做节日蛋糕 |
| [00:07] | So much better than last year when you go so drunk, | 这比去年好多了 你当时喝得烂醉 |
| [00:09] | you turned the 12 days of Christmas | 把圣诞十二日 |
| [00:11] | into the 12 steps of Christmas. | 变成圣诞十二步了 |
| [00:14] | Yeah, well, I finally gave in. | 是啊 我终于屈服了 |
| [00:16] | Christmas is like herpes. | 圣诞就像疱疹一样 |
| [00:18] | No matter what you do, | 不管你做什么 |
| [00:19] | it’s gonna flare up once a year. | 它还是每年都发作一次 |
| [00:22] | Oh, you made Feliz Navidad cupcake. | 哦 你做了”圣诞快乐”纸杯蛋糕 |
| [00:25] | I’m muy proud of you. | 我为你感到”灰”常骄傲 |
| [00:27] | And I think we’re going to make muy mucho moolah | 而且我觉得咱们不久之后 |
| [00:30] | when Manuel comes manana. | 就能赚灰常多滴钱 |
| [00:33] | You’re the only person I know | 我认识的讲西班牙的人当中 |
| [00:34] | who seems whiter speaking Spanish. | 就你一个人比较白一点 |
| [00:38] | Feliz Navidad for our Spanish speaking friends. | “圣诞快乐” 送给说西班牙语的朋友们 |
| [00:41] | And for kids raised like me, Feliz “He’s-not-your-dad.” | 而这个刚是献给像我这样的孩子 “他不是你爹”快乐 |
| [00:47] | And then, “Joy To The World” for the normals, | 接下来 “欢乐世界” 送给普通人 |
| [00:50] | and for the hipsters, “Joint To The World.” | 送给嬉皮士的呢 就是”大麻世界” |
| [00:54] | For the kids, “Frosty The Snowman.” | 送给小孩的 “霜白的雪人” |
| [00:57] | And for you, “Frosty With No Man.” | 还有送给你的 “冻死没男人” |
| [01:02] | Well, I didn’t see Jack Frost nipping at your nips either. | 好吧 杰克冻人也没有去捏揉你的乳头啊 |
| [01:07] | Oh, here, this one’s my favorite, | 哦 看这里 这个是我的最爱 |
| [01:09] | “Santa Claus Is Coming”… | “圣诞老人来…” |
| [01:10] | Max, stop right there. | Max 别说了 |
| [01:13] | No, that was it. He’s coming. | 不 我没别的意思 他来了 |
| [01:32] | Earl, change please. | Earl 找钱 |
| [01:33] | “Earl, change please.” | “Earl 找钱” |
| [01:35] | A phrase I heard from both my ex-wives. | 我两个前妻都对我说过这话 |
| [01:40] | Wow, you have more Christmas cards | 哇 你的圣诞贺卡 |
| [01:41] | than Oscar Pistorius had excuses. | 比奥斯卡.皮斯托瑞斯的借口都多 |
| [01:45] | What can I say, Max? I spread a lot of goodwill. | 我能说什么呢 Max? 我处处施善 |
| [01:48] | It’s also where I get all of my shirts. | 我所有的裇衫也是因此得来的 |
| [01:52] | Here you go. Have a nice holiday. | 拿着 节日快乐 |
| [01:56] | My two kids love this time of year. | 我的两个孩子们最爱每年的这个时候了 |
| [02:02] | And next Christmas, there will be three. | 到明年圣诞 我就会有三个孩子了 |
| [02:09] | It’s a boy. | 是个男孩 |
| [02:12] | My husband was so happy when I called him in Afghanistan. | 我在阿富汗的老公接到这电话非常高兴 |
| [02:21] | Man, this time of year people are easier | 每年这时候讨小费都好容易 |
| [02:23] | than a fat girl in a tube top. | 比胖妞穿抹胸还要容易 |
| [02:26] | Oh, great. We can use this money | 太好了 咱们可以用这个钱 |
| [02:27] | to order more of our cupcake T-shirts. | 多订做一些纸杯蛋糕T恤衫 |
| [02:29] | No, we are using that to buy people Christmas gifts. | 不行 我们要用这个钱给大家买圣诞礼物 |
| [02:32] | I was really looking forward to giving someone something | 我真的很希望自己在送礼物给别人之后 |
| [02:34] | that wouldn’t require the follow-up penicillin shot. | 不必再去打几针治性病 |
| [02:38] | We need more shirts. These are really selling. | 我们需要更多的T恤衫 这些东西卖得可好了 |
| [02:41] | The guy at table four said it’s the perfect gift | 四号桌的那个家伙说 这礼物 |
| [02:44] | for a girl you’re not in love with, just strictly banging. | 送给只谈性不谈爱的炮友最合适了 |
| [02:49] | He bought three. | 他买了三件 |
| [02:51] | I happen to know for a fact | 我碰巧知道 |
| [02:53] | that everyone here’s getting us stuff. | 这里的所有人都我们买了礼物 |
| [02:55] | Han came in with a small package today | Han今天进来的时候拿着一个小包 |
| [02:57] | and also he was carrying a gift bag. | 还有一个礼物袋 |
| [03:01] | We’ll find some money for the gifts. | 我们会搞到买礼物的钱 |
| [03:03] | People aren’t expecting anything big. | 大家也没指望着能有啥大的 |
| [03:05] | Happy holidays. | 节日快乐 |
| [03:08] | People just got the nothing big they were expecting. | 别人想要大的东西 有些人都没有 |
| [03:12] | Gather, please. I have a very special gift | 集合一下好吗 我有一份很特殊的礼物 |
| [03:14] | for all my diner employees. | 要送给我的餐馆员工们 |
| [03:16] | Health insurance? | 健康保险? |
| [03:17] | Come on, it’s Christmastime, not crazy time. | 拜托 这是圣诞节 不是疯子节 |
| [03:22] | It’s art. It’s a one of a kind silk screen. | 这是个艺术品 有着独一无二的丝绢网印花 |
| [03:25] | I did it by hand. | 这是我亲手做的 |
| [03:27] | I figured that’s how you always have to do it. | 我想你一直都是自己用手的啊 |
| [03:34] | Han, it’s the diner. This is amazing. | Han 这是我们的餐馆 太棒了 |
| [03:38] | Open the door. I put something behind it | 把门打开 我在门后还印有东西哦 |
| [03:40] | that reminds me of each of you. | 这是我对你们的印象 |
| [03:42] | Mine has Sophie. | 我的贺卡上有Sophie |
| [03:43] | Mine has a saxophone. | 我的贺卡上有个萨克斯 |
| [03:45] | Mine has a cupcake. | 我的上面有个纸杯蛋糕 |
| [03:47] | Mine has a chainsaw. | 我的上面有个电锯 |
| [03:57] | Hey, everybody! | 嘿 大家好! |
| [04:03] | Holiday shopping tip: | 圣诞购物小贴士 |
| [04:04] | Fill a Starbucks cup with vodka. | 在星巴克的咖啡杯里装满伏特加 |
| [04:09] | Also good for waitressing. | 这对女服务员也有用 |
| [04:12] | Sophie, were you Christmas shopping? | Sophie 你去圣诞购物了? |
| [04:14] | Oh, you know I was! | 哦 你懂得的! |
| [04:17] | Power strips! | 接线板! |
| [04:20] | Oh good. You got surge protectors. | 哦 太好了 你买了冲击电压保护器 |
| [04:23] | Wow, that’s the first time protection’s | 哇 那可是你第一次在自己家中 |
| [04:25] | ever been used in your apartment. | 采取保护措施 |
| [04:28] | Well, my Christmas village needs 75,000 watts. | 我的圣诞装扮需要7万5瓦特的电压 |
| [04:33] | And that’s just to work my candy cane helicopter. | 这还只够给我的糖果直升机用 |
| [04:37] | Sophie’s been so busy with the Polish Society Decorating Contest. | Sophie最近一直在忙着参加波兰联合社装扮大赛 |
| [04:41] | We haven’t had sex in days. | 我们已经好几天没有做爱了 |
| [04:43] | Well, I got to beat my nemesis, Felka Bobenski. | 好吧 我得打败我的死对头 Felka Bobenski |
| [04:47] | She wins every year. | 她每年都拿第一 |
| [04:49] | She’s like the Modern Family of Christmas decorations | 她就像圣诞装扮界里的”摩登家庭” |
| [04:53] | You know who’s having a blue Christmas this year? | 你知道今年谁要过忧伤圣诞节了吗? |
| [04:56] | My balls. | 我的蛋蛋 |
| [05:03] | I love this city at the holidays. | 我爱圣诞节中的这座城市 |
| [05:05] | Yeah, the urine’s all frozen | 是啊 尿都冻住了 |
| [05:07] | so you can’t really smell it. | 你根本闻不到味道 |
| [05:09] | Manhattan is the best place to buy quality Christmas gifts. | 曼哈顿是买高档的圣诞礼物最好的地方了 |
| [05:12] | We have 40 bucks. | 我们有40块钱 |
| [05:14] | Now, where are those duffel bags | 那些装满了 |
| [05:15] | full of stolen electronics sold for half the price | 由东非难民偷来半价出售的 |
| [05:17] | by Nairobi refugees? | 电子元件的大袋子在哪? |
| [05:19] | Well, we better find them soon | 我们得赶紧找到 |
| [05:20] | or I’m going to give up and go to Radio Shack | 不然我就得像别人那样 |
| [05:22] | like everyone else who goes to Radio Shack. | 去逛电子市场了 |
| [05:25] | Oh my God, Max. | 天啊 Max |
| [05:26] | My childhood bank. | 我的童年银行 |
| [05:28] | You had a childhood bank? | 你有一个童年银行? |
| [05:30] | I didn’t even have a childhood. | 我连童年都没有 |
| [05:33] | Come on, let’s go. I stop in every few months | 来吧 我们走 我每隔几个月都会进去 |
| [05:35] | to get caught on the security cameras, | 让监控拍我几张照片 |
| [05:37] | so people will think I’m still in the mix. | 好让别人以为我还在那个圈子里 |
| [05:39] | Trying to get caught on security cameras? | 你想被监控拍到自己? |
| [05:41] | Whoa, we are different. | 哇 我们真是太不同了 |
| [05:44] | Yeah, we’ll just go in and while we’re in here, | 我们进去吧 在里面的时候 |
| [05:47] | well, I don’t know, ask for a business loan. | 要不咱们去搞个商业贷款吧 |
| [05:51] | We are not getting a business loan! | 我们才不要去商业贷款! |
| [05:53] | You tricked me into coming to the city. | 你要想骗我进城 |
| [05:55] | At least knock me out and put me in the trunk like a person. | 至少也得把我敲晕 然后像人一样塞进后车箱吧 |
| [05:59] | Okay, I hear you. No loan. | 好 我听你的 不贷款 |
| [06:02] | But can we at least go in there | 但是我们能否至少进去走一下 |
| [06:03] | so I can get a hit off some vault fumes | 让我闻一下金库的味道 |
| [06:04] | and a complimentary Christmas cocoa? | 再来杯免费的圣诞可可? |
| [06:07] | Yeah, I want one too. | 好 我也要一杯 |
| [06:08] | It’s so cold out here | 这外面太冷了 |
| [06:09] | my bra is suing my nipples for assault. | 我的胸罩都要起诉我的胸骚扰它了 |
| [06:14] | I’d say we ask for $15,000. | 不如咱们贷个15000美元吧 |
| [06:18] | So close I almost smelled a 100. | 这里近得我几乎闻到一百块的味道了 |
| [06:21] | What is with you? | 你是怎么了? |
| [06:22] | If I wanted you to keep lying to me, | 要是我想让你一直骗我 |
| [06:24] | I’d date you. | 我就会跟你约会了 |
| [06:26] | Max, we need more capital | Max 我们需要更多资金 |
| [06:28] | so we can buy our shirts in bulk, | 这样就能大量购买我们的T恤 |
| [06:29] | and then, if we work even harder, | 然后 如果我们再努力点工作 |
| [06:31] | we can double our profit. | 我们就能获得双倍利润 |
| [06:33] | Okay, we won’t pass even the credit check. | 我们甚至连信用检查都通过不了的 |
| [06:35] | According to my Social Security number, | 根据我的社保号 |
| [06:37] | I died in a boat explosion years ago. | 我在几年前的船爆炸中死了 |
| [06:41] | This is the time to apply. | 现在申请的好时候 |
| [06:43] | Bankers have more guilt at Christmastime | 银行家在圣诞节时更容易心软 |
| [06:45] | because of It’s A Wonderful Life. | 因为”生活多美好” |
| [06:45] | 圣诞节经典电影 准备自杀的主人公遇到天使并重振旗鼓的故事 | |
| [06:46] | And also ’cause they’re Jewish. | 而且他们是犹太人 不过圣诞节 |
| [06:48] | I’m the one with the business degree, | 我可是拿了商学院学位的 |
| [06:50] | and you have to trust me on this. | 这一点你一定要相信我 |
| [06:52] | You know what? You’re right. | 你知道吗? 你说得对 |
| [06:53] | You’re the business genius. What do I know? | 你是商业天才 而我知道什么? |
| [06:56] | Let’s go get that loan. | 我们去借贷款 |
| [06:57] | Thank you! | 谢谢! |
| [07:03] | Yeah, I should have known that was too good to be true. | 好吧 我就该知道你哪有这么好说话 |
| [07:13] | Max, come on. | Max 别这样 |
| [07:14] | The bank’s there. Our shirt’s in here. | 银行就在那儿 我们的T恤就在这里 |
| [07:16] | Let’s just go in, show them, and apply for that loan. | 我们只要进去 给他们看 然后申请贷款 |
| [07:18] | – Please! – No. | – 求你了! – 不 |
| [07:19] | – Please! – No. | – 求你了! – 不 |
| [07:20] | – Please! – No. | – 求你了! – 不 |
| [07:22] | And that right there was a little something | 就在那儿有个小东西 |
| [07:24] | called “us asking for a bank loan.” | 写着”我们要银行贷款” |
| [07:27] | Now let’s go. | 现在走吧 |
| [07:28] | I’m not leaving here until you tell me | 我不会走的 除非你告诉我 |
| [07:30] | what the underlying issue is. | 你究竟在担心什么 |
| [07:32] | I’m not in love with you anymore. | 我再也不爱你了 |
| [07:35] | Max, be serious. | Max 认真点 |
| [07:36] | This whole T-shirt was your idea. | 这整件T裇都是你的创意 |
| [07:38] | What’s the real problem? | 真正的问题是什么? |
| [07:39] | That’s the problem. | 这就是问题所在 |
| [07:40] | Those shirts were my idea | 这些T恤是我的主意 |
| [07:42] | and nothing that comes from me is worth $15,000. | 我想出来的东西从不值一万五 |
| [07:45] | Aside from that baby I sold on E-baby. | 除了我在如意宝贝店卖出的那个婴儿 |
| [07:48] | Max, I know these T-shirts are a money-maker. | Max 我知道这些T恤是赚钱的玩意儿 |
| [07:51] | Oh, I have a money-maker and that’s not it. | 哦 我有赚钱的玩意儿 但不是它 |
| [07:55] | I can prove it. | 我可以证明 |
| [07:56] | Look, this is Rodney, | 看 这是Rodney |
| [07:58] | my childhood over-priced clothing store. | 我童年的高档服装店 |
| [08:01] | If I had known we were going on the childhood tour today, | 早知道我们今天是去游览童年 |
| [08:05] | I would have worn more comfortable shoes | 我就会穿一双更舒服的鞋子 |
| [08:06] | and stayed home. | 并且呆在家里 |
| [08:08] | See the shirt on the mannequin? | 看见模特身上那件T恤吗? |
| [08:10] | At least $200. | 至少两百美元 |
| [08:12] | And there’s no reason we can’t sell ours for just as much. | 我们的T恤没理由卖不到相同的价钱 |
| [08:15] | I’ll show you. Follow me. | 我会证明给你看 跟着我 |
| [08:17] | Oh, okay, I will. But not on Instagram, | 好 我会关注你的 但不是在照片网上 |
| [08:19] | ’cause you’re out of control. | 因为你已经是晒照狂人 |
| [08:24] | This place is fancy | 这地方真花哨 |
| [08:25] | and I’ve been to the new Port Authority in Newark. | 连纽瓦克的新港务局都会自叹不如 |
| [08:29] | Just trust me, okay? | 相信我 好吗? |
| [08:31] | You need to jump on those Wang pumps | 你要穿着Wang(品牌)的高跟鞋跳两下 |
| [08:33] | or like Ben Affleck, they will be “Gone, girl.” | 或者像本·阿弗莱克演的那样 成为”消失的爱人” |
| [08:33] | 本·阿弗莱克出演了电影”消失的爱人” | |
| [08:37] | Let me do the talking. I speak his language. | 让我来说 我会说他的语言 |
| [08:40] | And what language is that? Portu-gays? | 那是什么语言? 葡萄基佬语? |
| [08:44] | Hello, ladies. Welcome to Rodney. | 你好 女士们 欢迎光临Rodney |
| [08:46] | I’m Barry. | 我是Barry |
| [08:48] | Doing a little holiday shopping? | 你们是在假日购物吗? |
| [08:50] | We’re not allowed to say Christmas. | 我们不能说圣诞节 |
| [08:53] | As a matter of fact, we’re doing a little holiday selling. | 实际上 我们是在假日出售 |
| [08:56] | Oh, you’re “selling.” | 哦 你在”出售” |
| [08:58] | Got it. Molly? Coke? | 懂了 摇头丸? 可卡因? |
| [09:01] | Not that I’m interested. | 我都不感兴趣 |
| [09:02] | I’ve been clean since Fire Island 2010. | 自从火岛2010年的缉毒行动后我就戒了 |
| [09:05] | And 2012. | 还有2012年那时 |
| [09:08] | It must be hard to not be high and be you. | 不嗑嗨却要做自己 这很难受吧 |
| [09:12] | Because it’s hard for me | 因为不能嗑嗨了却要靠近你 |
| [09:14] | to just be near you and not be high. | 这让我觉得很难受 |
| [09:18] | Yeah, you get it, girl. | 你懂的 妹子 |
| [09:20] | Actually, we wanted to see if you’d be interested | 实际上我们是想看看你是否有兴趣 |
| [09:22] | in selling one of our fabulous graphic t-shirts. | 卖我们这种图案超棒的T恤 |
| [09:25] | Oh, n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n… | 哦 不不不不不… |
| [09:28] | all sorts of “no”, okay? | 各种”不” 好吗? |
| [09:30] | As much as I love a fez, a caftan, and a teenage boy, | 虽然爱土耳其毡帽 配腰带的长袍 以及男孩子 |
| [09:33] | this isn’t Morocco. | 但这里不是摩洛哥 |
| [09:35] | That’s a really long and boring version of “No.” | 真是一长串烦人的”不” |
| [09:39] | It’s like you just did “No! The One Woman Show.” | 就像你说”不! 独角戏(品牌)时装秀” |
| [09:44] | Here’s our T-shirt… | 这是我们的T恤… |
| [09:45] | Look. | 看看 |
| [09:46] | I’ll tell you two what I said to a young Marc Jacobs. | 知道我是怎么对年轻的马克·雅可布说的吗 |
| [09:49] | Stop offering, I’m off the junk. | 别送给我 我不要垃圾货 |
| [09:53] | Merry Holiday. | 节日快乐 |
| [09:55] | I’ll show Mary a holiday. | 我要让圣母知道啥叫节日 |
| [09:58] | Our shirts are just as good as these. | 咱们的裇衫和这些一样好 |
| [09:59] | He just needs to see it. | 他只要看了就知道 |
| [10:04] | Here, hold this. | 给你 拿着 |
| [10:07] | What are you? American Psycho? | 你是谁? 美国精神病人? |
| [10:09] | As soon as someone says “No” to you, | 一旦有人对你说”不” |
| [10:10] | you start dismembering women. | 你就开始肢解女人 |
| [10:13] | I can’t get her shirt off. | 我脱不下她的T恤 |
| [10:15] | Tell her she can spend the night | 告诉她 她可以过夜 |
| [10:16] | and you’ll buy her a waffle in the morning. | 而你早上会给她买华夫饼 |
| [10:19] | Okay, hand me our shirt. | 好了 把咱们的T恤给我 |
| [10:21] | I think this is gonna be big for us. | 我觉得这将是我们关键的一步 |
| [10:23] | You also think Michael Buble rocks. | 你还觉得Michael Buble(爵士歌手)唱摇滚呢 |
| [10:26] | Oh, I have to hurry. Barry is coming. | 哦 我要抓紧了 Barry快出来了 |
| [10:29] | Barry is coming. | Barry快出来了 |
| [10:30] | I’m guessing mostly with strangers. | 看来你是爱和陌生人爱爱啊 |
| [10:34] | Seriously? | 真的假的? |
| [10:37] | Seriously? | 真的假的? |
| [10:39] | Ser-I-ous-ly? | 不!是!吧? |
| [10:44] | So cute. | 好可爱 |
| [10:46] | And look on the back, “Cream Filled.” | 看看后面 写着”奶油爆满” |
| [10:49] | Funny. | 有趣 |
| [10:50] | People will think I have a personality. | 人们会觉得我很有个性 |
| [10:53] | Barry, put this with my other stuff. | Barry 把这件和我要其他那些都放一起 |
| [10:55] | How much? | 多少钱? |
| [10:56] | 300. | 三百块 |
| [10:57] | Forget the sober story. That guy is high. | 还说什么戒掉了 那家伙嗨了吧 |
| [11:01] | I’ll take ten. | 给我来十件 |
| [11:02] | They’ll make great Hanukkah gifts | 对于我那些不讨厌自己胳膊的朋友来说 |
| [11:04] | for my friends who don’t hate their arms. | 这会是很棒的光明节礼物 |
| [11:07] | All our shirts just got bought by a rich dead lady. | 我们的T恤刚被一个有钱的死女人买了 |
| [11:12] | I’ll need 30 more by Friday. | 周五前再给我来三十件 |
| [11:19] | Yes, I’m still holding. | 是的 我还在等 |
| [11:20] | I need to place a rush t-shirt order. | 我要下一个紧急的T恤订单 |
| [11:22] | No, no, no, no, no. Don’t put me on hold again. | 不行 不行 不能让我再等了 |
| [11:24] | I’ve been through seven rounds of | 我已经听了七遍 |
| [11:25] | Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer. | “奶奶被驯鹿撞倒了”这歌 |
| [11:29] | And she just got run over again. | 她又被撞了一遍 |
| [11:32] | Now that we have all this crazy gay t-shirt money, | 咱们现在从疯基佬那里赚了点钱 |
| [11:35] | I think we should up the prices on these gifts. | 我想我们应该再买贵点的礼物 |
| [11:38] | So we agree, we’re getting Earl a car. | 所以咱们一致决定给Earl送一辆车 |
| [11:40] | Sophie is getting the country house with the lake she’s always wanted. | 送Sophie一幢她梦寐以求的湖边乡间别墅 |
| [11:44] | Max, Rodney is selling our shirts for 300, | Max Rodney把咱的T恤卖三百一件 |
| [11:47] | but we only get 25 of that. | 但咱们只能赚25块 |
| [11:49] | And you can’t buy a house for $750. | 750块钱可买不了一幢房子 |
| [11:52] | It’s not Detroit. | 因为咱们不在底特律 |
| [11:56] | Yes, hi, hi, hi. Finally a person. | 是的 嗨 终于来了个人接电话 |
| [11:58] | I need 50 T-shirts by Friday. | 周五前我要五十件T恤 |
| [12:01] | But your business card says you guarantee next-day delivery. | 但是你们名片写着 你们确保翌日邮递 |
| [12:05] | Oh, you can’t “Guarantee” that guarantee? | 哦 你不能”确保”那个保证? |
| [12:08] | Okay, now Oleg. | 好了 说到Oleg |
| [12:10] | What do you get a man who has nothing, | 这个一无所有 但是让你 |
| [12:12] | but shows you everything? | 一览无遗的男人 你还能送他什么 |
| [12:15] | What do you mean “Is there anything else you can help me with?” | 什么叫”还有什么需要帮忙的吗?” |
| [12:17] | When did you help me at all? | 你究竟有帮到我什么 |
| [12:21] | And I’m beginning to think if Grandma works for you, | 我现在开始想 如果奶奶真的为你们工作 |
| [12:23] | she didn’t get run over by that reindeer, | 她不是被驯鹿撞死的 |
| [12:25] | she threw herself under a sleigh. | 她是自己一头撞死在雪橇车的 |
| [12:29] | So, Sophie’s getting a Snapple. | 送给Sophie一瓶斯纳普饮料 |
| [12:33] | Like last year. | 跟去年一样 |
| [12:34] | Max, we can’t give up. We can do them ourselves. | Max 我们不能放弃 我们可以自己完成 |
| [12:37] | We just need someone else to do them. | 我们只需要找人完成 |
| [12:40] | Come on, let’s go. | 来吧 快出去 |
| [12:42] | There are customers who have been here | 外面有顾客等好久了 |
| [12:43] | since Robin Thicke was relevant. | 罗宾·西克也等了好久才红 |
| [12:46] | Wait a minute, Han. You silk-screened all those beautiful cards. | 等等 Han 你丝印了那些漂亮的卡片 |
| [12:50] | You have an artistic side. | 你在艺术方面有才能 |
| [12:51] | Yeah, but no backside. | 是的 只是后面没曲线 |
| [12:53] | And a front side that shouldn’t be allowed outside. | 而且他的正面影响市容 |
| [13:09] | Why is this taking so long? | 你为什么这么慢啊? |
| [13:11] | You did all those Christmas cards. | 连那些圣诞卡你你丝印了 |
| [13:13] | Aren’t small creatures supposed to be fast? | 难道不是个子越小的动作就越快吗? |
| [13:16] | Truth be told, those were supposed to be ready last year. | 说实话 那些卡片是去年就应该做好的 |
| [13:19] | But, what was the rush? | 但是 着什么急呢? |
| [13:21] | You two weren’t going anywhere. | 反正你俩也没事干 |
| [13:23] | Han, just a simple “Yes” or “No”. | Han 你只要说”是”或”不是”就行 |
| [13:25] | No judgment. | 我们不做评论 |
| [13:27] | Have you had sex with this machine? | 你有没有跟这台机器做爱? |
| [13:30] | The only thing worse than you two working for me | 比你们俩给我打工更糟糕的事 |
| [13:32] | is me working for you. | 就是我给你们打工 |
| [13:33] | You haven’t even given me water. | 连口水都不给我喝 |
| [13:36] | Water is for closers. | 水是给工人喝的 |
| [13:39] | By “closers,” I mean people who actually make clothes. | 我说的”工人”是指真正制作衣服的人 |
| [13:45] | Who’s that? | 谁啊? |
| [13:46] | Han, did you call Child Protective Service on us? | Han 你是不是向儿童保护机构举报我们了? |
| [13:51] | ‘Cause those bruises could be from anyone. | 那些淤青可能是任何人造成的 |
| [13:54] | Han, you’ve only made one shirt in two hours. | Han 两个小时你才弄好一件 |
| [13:57] | And it’s a masterpiece. Do you want one Citizen Kane | 这可是杰作 你想要一个公民凯恩那样的经典 |
| [14:00] | or 30 Here Comes the Booms? | 还是三十个好景在望那样的烂片? |
| [14:03] | Guys, I need your help. | 同志们 我需要你们的帮助 |
| [14:06] | Sophie’s right behind me and needs some cheering up. | Sophie就在我后面 需要让她高兴起来 |
| [14:09] | I haven’t seen her this depressed | 自从她昨晚在嘿咻的中途中醒来 |
| [14:10] | since she woke up mid-coitus last night. | 我从未见过她这么沮丧的 |
| [14:18] | Hi. | 嗨 |
| [14:19] | Hi. Hi, girls. | 嗨 嗨 丫头们 |
| [14:20] | Merry Christmas. | 圣诞节快乐 |
| [14:21] | Quick question: | 问个问题 |
| [14:23] | if I were to turn on that oven and close all the windows, | 如果我打开灶 关上窗户 |
| [14:26] | would I die? | 我会死吗? |
| [14:28] | Nope. | 不会 |
| [14:29] | Otherwise I wouldn’t be standing here | 否则我也会不站在 |
| [14:30] | next to Kim Jong-Only-Done-One. | 效率低下的金正”一”旁边 |
| [14:34] | Sophie, what’s the problem? | Sophie 怎么回事? |
| [14:36] | Tell Han while he gets back to work. | 告诉Han 让他赶紧干活 |
| [14:37] | And Han, pick up the pace | Han 你快点 |
| [14:39] | or I’m going to start the pinching again. | 否则我又要掐你了 |
| [14:42] | I’m gonna lose the Christmas decorating contest. | 我要输掉圣诞节装饰比赛了 |
| [14:45] | Oh, I have nothing to live for. | 我没有活下去的念头了 |
| [14:49] | Oh, Caroline, this is probably how you feel every day. | Caroline 也许你每天都是这种感觉 |
| [14:55] | Sophie’s competition made a live-action | Sophie的对手在她门前 |
| [14:57] | North Pole workshop in front of her house. | 搞了场北极实时表演 |
| [15:01] | Well, all I got upstairs is a light-up nativity | 我楼上只有灯火通明的耶稣出生地 |
| [15:04] | and $25,000 worth of Target Christmas decorations. | 和价值两万五的圣诞节装饰品 |
| [15:09] | She blew five fuses last night. | 她昨晚烧坏了五根保险丝 |
| [15:12] | I never thought I’d be jealous of a fuse. | 我从未想过我会嫉妒保险丝 |
| [15:16] | Sophie, we really can’t get into this now. | Sophie 我们真的没时间弄这个 |
| [15:18] | We are way behind with these T-shirts. | 我们还得把T恤赶工制好 |
| [15:20] | And these T-shirts are a once in a lifetime chance | 这些T恤可是我们千载难逢的好机会 |
| [15:23] | for us to go to a new place with our business. | 能为我们的生意打开一片新天地 |
| [15:26] | Oh yeah, I hear you, girls. | 嗯 我听到你说的了 丫头们 |
| [15:29] | I mean, what am I doing here | 我到底在这里干嘛啊 |
| [15:30] | sitting worrying about some silly contest? | 担心什么破比赛? |
| [15:33] | It’s Christmas. | 这可是圣诞节 |
| [15:34] | Come on everybody. | 来吧 同志们 |
| [15:36] | We should all be helping the girls. | 我们都应该帮帮丫头们 |
| [15:38] | Really? That would be so amazing. | 真的? 那真是太棒了 |
| [15:40] | Sure! And you wouldn’t even have to pay me back | 当然! 你们都不用给我工钱 |
| [15:43] | by letting me use your barn and your horse tomorrow night | 只要明天晚上把你们的谷仓和马借我用用 |
| [15:46] | for a live nativity scene, which you would all have to be in. | 我们要上演耶稣诞生 你们都要参加 |
| [15:49] | Or something like that. | 差不多就是这样 |
| [15:53] | I think we just had a seasonal shake-down. | 我想咱们刚遭遇了季节性的敲诈 |
| [16:02] | Han’s doing the last one. We’re gonna make it. | Han在弄最后一个 我们会完成的 |
| [16:05] | I can’t believe you’re in such a good mood with that beard. | 真不敢相信 你贴着那假胡子还能这么开心 |
| [16:08] | Last week when you found those two chin hairs, | 上周你发现自己下巴长了两根毛时 |
| [16:10] | you weren’t so chipper. | 可没这么开心 |
| [16:12] | I’m just so happy I have new clothes. | 我只是很开心有新衣服穿了 |
| [16:14] | Okay, final shirt. | 好了 最后一件衬衫 |
| [16:16] | Then I get you two out of my angel hair. | 然后你们俩就可以消失了 |
| [16:19] | Han, you know, if it weren’t for you, | Han 要不是你的话 |
| [16:20] | we would have never gotten this done. | 我们绝对完不成任务 |
| [16:22] | You really are a little angel. | 你真的是个小天使 |
| [16:24] | Yeah, you are. But I’m still surprised | 没错 但我还是很惊讶 |
| [16:26] | you weren’t cast as the baby. | 你竟然不扮婴儿 |
| [16:29] | Oh, I was asked, but I declined. | 哦 我被问到来着 但我拒绝了 |
| [16:31] | I spent ten year getting out of diapers. | 我花了十年才摆脱尿布 |
| [16:33] | I’m not getting back in. | 我才不要重新穿上 |
| [16:37] | Han, for your Christmas gift, | Han 作为你的圣诞礼物 |
| [16:40] | I’ll pretend I never heard that. | 我就假装没听到吧 |
| [16:42] | Places everybody. | 各就各位 |
| [16:44] | The judges are coming. I’m ready. | 评委们要来了 我好了 |
| [16:47] | Joseph’s ready. Cabbage Patch Christ is ready. | 约瑟好了 “耶”菜娃娃好了 |
| [16:50] | Come on! | 快 |
| [16:52] | What’s with the cleavage? | 那乳沟是怎么回事? |
| [16:54] | I know. | 可不是 |
| [16:54] | She’s like the Not-So-Virgin Mary. | 她像是非圣女玛丽亚 |
| [17:00] | Angel, Shepherd, Lady with the beard, | 小天使 牧羊人 长胡子的小姐 |
| [17:03] | come on, get in the stable. | 快点 到马厩来 |
| [17:05] | Stable? | 马厩? |
| [17:06] | The way we look it should be an “Unstable.” | 我们的样子看起来更像”没救”才对 |
| [17:09] | Everybody ready? I’m going to open the barn door. | 都准备好了吗? 我要开谷仓门了 |
| [17:12] | Yeah, I think your barn door’s already a little open. | 我看你的门早就有点开了 |
| [17:16] | Okay now, who am I again? | 那个 我是谁来着? |
| [17:19] | Voltron? | 战神? |
| [17:21] | I’m not gonna lie. One of the wise men | 我不说假话 可能有智者 |
| [17:23] | might have smoked some “Myrrh-ijuana.” | 吸过”圣大麻” |
| [17:27] | That was a very nice Christmas gift, Max. | 这份圣诞礼物很有心 Max |
| [17:30] | Thanks, Earl. By the way, Sophie, | 谢谢 Earl 对了 Sophie |
| [17:32] | the barn and us dressed like idiots? | 谷仓加上我们穿得跟白痴似的? |
| [17:33] | That’s your Christmas gift. | 是给你的圣诞礼物 |
| [17:35] | Oh, and hey, bang Oleg later. | 还有 一会儿跟Oleg来一炮 |
| [17:37] | Oleg, that’s your gift. | Oleg 这是你的礼物 |
| [17:39] | How did you know? | 你怎么知道? |
| [17:41] | Before they come in, let’s just take a moment to look around | 他们进来之前 让我们抽点时间回顾一年 |
| [17:44] | and really let in the true spirit of Christmas. | 衷心迎接真正的圣诞精神吧 |
| [17:47] | I don’t remember writing you a monologue. | 我不记得有给你写独白 |
| [17:50] | Shut up! | 给我闭嘴! |
| [17:51] | Get your ass over by the horse. | 站到马旁边去 |
| [17:53] | Come on, Han. Hit the music. | 来吧 Han 放音乐 |
| [17:58] | All right, everybody, | 好了 各位 |
| [17:59] | look holy. | 庄严起来 |
| [18:01] | Best I can do is my underwear. | 我已经穿上内裤了 |
| [18:14] | Oh , crap! | 我去! |
| [18:16] | Oh, that’s right, Felka. | 没错 Felka |
| [18:18] | I’m the freakin’ mother of God. | 我是上帝他妈 |
| [18:25] | We won! | 我们赢了! |
| [18:26] | I’m so happy we won. | 我好开心赢了 |
| [18:29] | We won! We Won! | 我们赢了! 我们赢了! |
| [18:32] | Okay, show’s over. | 好了 表演结束 |
| [18:35] | Dump the kid, I’ll be upstairs. | 扔掉孩子 我在楼上等你 |
| [18:38] | Max, take care of Cabbage Patch Christ. | Max 照顾好”耶”菜娃娃 |
| [18:42] | Here, Han. You got a buddy your own size. | 给你 Han 你有个和你个子相仿的同伴了 |
| [18:51] | Thank you so much, Barry. | 太感谢你了 Barry |
| [18:52] | And remember, I want 50 more shirts | 别忘了 新年过后我从戒毒所回来 |
| [18:55] | after the first of the year when I’m back from rehab. | 还要五十件衬衫 |
| [18:58] | ‘Cause ladies, I am planning a very white Christmas. | 因为女士们 我今年打算过一个白粉圣诞节 |
| [19:02] | Max, this is amazing! | Max 这真是太棒了! |
| [19:04] | Do you know what just happened in there? | 你知道刚刚发生了什么吗? |
| [19:05] | Yeah, I stole some dope-ass fingerless gloves. | 当然 我偷了一副酷毙了的无指手套 |
| [19:10] | We’re in business with them now. | 我们现在跟他们做生意呢 |
| [19:12] | You have to bring those back. | 你得还回去 |
| [19:13] | I got them for you. | 我为你拿的 |
| [19:14] | Okay. | 那好吧 |
| [19:16] | This is like a Christmas miracle. | 这就像圣诞奇迹啊 |
| [19:18] | Our shirts are being sold in | 我们的衬衫在 |
| [19:19] | the most exclusive bitchy boutique in Manhattan | 曼哈顿最顶级的傲娇精品店出售 |
| [19:22] | and they want more, lots more. | 而且他们还要货 要很多 |
| [19:25] | Hey, let’s go into your childhood bank. | 嘿 我们去你的童年银行吧 |
| [19:26] | I need to take an adult pee. | 我得撒泡成人尿 |
| [19:28] | Okay, but this isn’t home, so remember, | 好吧 但这不是在家里 所以记住 |
| [19:30] | put the seat down when you’re done. | 完事了把马桶座放下 |
| [19:32] | And while we’re in there, we can apply for that loan. | 我们在里面的时候 还可以申请贷款 |
| [19:36] | No, no, no, no, no. We can’t. | 不 不 不 不行 |
| [19:38] | Now I’m afraid. | 现在我害怕了 |
| [19:39] | Come on, what’s the real issue here? | 拜托 到底怎么回事? |
| [19:41] | We just had this amazing success. | 我们刚取得了惊人的成功 |
| [19:43] | And it looks like things are going our way, | 看起来事情一顺百顺 |
| [19:45] | and if we go in there, it could all be ruined. | 如果我们进去了 可能就都毁了 |
| [19:47] | You know what would ruin our lives even more? | 你知道怎样会更毁人生吗? |
| [19:49] | If we don’t get that loan and have to spend hours | 就是我们不申请贷款 就得长时间跟Han在一起 |
| [19:51] | with Han standing under us trying to finish those shirts. | 让他在我们”下面”做衬衫 |
| [19:55] | Well, that’s a real “Nightmare Before Christmas.” | 好吧 那真的是”圣诞夜惊魂”了 |
| [19:57] | Let’s go. | 我们走 |
| [19:58] | Good, cause I’m starting to pee a little. | 很好 因为我已经要尿出来了 |
| [20:06] | He gave us a loan! | 我们拿到贷款了! |
| [20:08] | Is everyone who works on the street high? | 在这条街上工作的人都吸晕了吗? |
| [20:12] | I can’t believe it. It didn’t go bad. | 简直不敢相信 事情没有搞砸 |
| [20:14] | I’m getting everything I want. | 我要的全有了 |
| [20:17] | Walk on the outside of the sidewalk. | 你走人行道外面 |
| [20:18] | I’m gonna get hit by a bus. | 我幸运得要被车撞上了 |
| [20:20] | I mean, how could he give us a loan? | 他怎么能给我们贷款呢? |
| [20:22] | I didn’t even have to flash my boobs. | 我甚至不用亮出胸器 |
| [20:24] | Then why did you do it? | 那你干嘛还给人看? |
| [20:27] | I don’t know. They were making it rain. | 不知道 他们这么慷慨 |
| [20:28] | I felt obliged. | 我觉得有义务秀一下 |
| [20:31] | Max, do you have a dollar? | Max 你有一块钱吗? |
| [20:32] | I don’t know. Do you have change for 10,000? | 不知道 你能找开一万块吗? |
| [20:35] | Yeah, here. For what? | 有 给你 干嘛啊? |
| [20:36] | For those less fortunate. | 给那些不这么幸运的人 |
| [20:38] | Anne Hathaway’s here? | 安妮 海瑟薇来了? |
| [20:44] | Oh, my God. Look! Look! | 天啊 快看! 快看! |
| [20:47] | Whoa, no way! No way! | 哇 不是吧! 不会吧! |
| [20:50] | Max, I have chills. | Max 我都起鸡皮疙瘩了 |
| [20:52] | Well, it is snowing and there’s no fingers on those gloves. | 因为天在下雪 手套还没有指头 |
| [20:56] | I love these. | 我爱这双手套 |
| [20:57] | I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything. | 抱歉没有给你礼物 |
| [20:59] | I’m just not a thief. | 因为我不偷东西 |
| [21:00] | What do you mean you didn’t get me anything? | 你怎么会什么都没有给我呢? |
| [21:02] | You got me everything. Look. | 你给了我一切 看啊 |