| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Max, Caroline, I have announcement. | 麦克斯 卡洛琳 我有事情要宣布 |
| [00:04] | You’re actually much shorter and are walking on stilts? | 你是因为踩着高跷 才有这样的身高吗 |
| [00:08] | I have made a special menu | 我为明天的情人节晚餐 |
| [00:09] | for tomorrow’s Valentine’s night dinner. | 制作了份特别的菜单 |
| [00:11] | Han, that’s so romantic. | 阿憨 真是浪漫啊 |
| [00:14] | Yeah, romantic and wrong. | 没错 既浪漫又白目 |
| [00:15] | This place isn’t When Harry met Sally. | 这地方不是在演《当哈里遇见萨莉》 |
| [00:17] | It’s “When Harry met Salmonella.” | 而是”当哈里遇见沙门氏菌” |
| [00:21] | Max, Club Sandwich. | 麦克斯 总会三明治 |
| [00:23] | And heads up… I lost a band-aid. | 先提醒你 我有个创可贴下落不明 |
| [00:27] | Theme menu means I can charge one bigger price, | 有主题菜单 我就能合理抬高价格 |
| [00:29] | like in top restaurants. | 就像高档餐厅那样 |
| [00:31] | See? “Prick fix.” | 看见没 “套子定价” |
| [00:32] | Oh, Han, it’s pronounced “prix fixe.” | 阿憨呀 这个应该念”套餐定价” |
| [00:35] | Have you seen our chef? | 你瞧见咱们主厨了吗 |
| [00:36] | It’s definitely “prick fix.” | 铁定是念”套子定价” |
| [00:39] | Tomorrow night, | 明天晚上 |
| [00:40] | Cupid will come to Williamsburg diner. | 丘比特会飞来威廉斯堡餐馆哟 |
| [00:46] | Didn’t have the heart to tell him Cupid is dead. | 懒得告诉他其实丘比特早死了 |
| [00:49] | Yep, hit by a mack truck | 没错 他在飞过高速公路时 |
| [00:51] | crossing the Brooklyn-Queens expressway… | 被一辆重型卡车撞得稀巴烂 |
| [00:54] | His fat, diapered baby ass | 他那裹着尿布的婴儿肥臀 |
| [00:56] | splattered all over the windshield. | 溅满整个挡风玻璃 |
| [00:59] | I love Valentine’s Day. | 我爱情人节 |
| [01:02] | That’s your reaction? I killed Cupid. | 你就这反应啊 姐杀了丘比特呢 |
| [01:04] | You’re either romantic or not. | 无论你有无浪漫情怀 |
| [01:05] | I’m not even going to try to convince you. | 我都懒得花力气去说服你 |
| [01:07] | Oh, he’s dead. And the proof… | 他的确死了 证据就是… |
| [01:09] | When’s the last time you knew anyone who fell in love? | 你上一次见人坠入爱河是什么时候 |
| [01:12] | Real love, like Ice Loves Coco. | 真爱哦 好比《冰冰爱可可》 |
| [01:12] | 《冰冰爱可可》美国真人秀节目 西岸帮派饶舌鼻祖Ice-T与他老婆CoCo镜头前大秀恩爱 | |
| [01:15] | How about them? | 那他俩呢 |
| [01:15] | They’ve been holding hands and romantic whispering all night. | 他们整晚都拉着手 浪漫地耳语 |
| [01:18] | Their romantic whispering goes like this. | 他们的浪漫耳语其实是 |
| [01:20] | “I own nipple clamps.” | “我有乳头夹” |
| [01:25] | Plink! Cupid’s not dead. | 咻 丘比特没死 |
| [01:27] | Plink! There goes his little arrow. | 咻咻 爱神之箭飞射过去 |
| [01:29] | Plink, plink! | 咻咻咻 |
| [01:30] | Clamp, ouch! Clamp, ouch! | 我夹 哎呦 我夹 哎呦 |
| [01:33] | Clamp, clamp! Ouch, ouch! | 我夹夹夹 我爽爽爽 |
| [01:53] | Max, since it’s just after midnight, | 麦克斯 既然十二点已过 |
| [01:56] | it’s now officially Valentine’s Day. | 现在就算是情人节啦 |
| [01:58] | I’ve got something in here for you… guess what it is. | 我这里给你准备了点东西 你猜是什么呀 |
| [02:01] | Well, judging from that smile on your face, | 从你脸上的淫笑判断 |
| [02:03] | I’d say it’s a finger-sized hole in your apron. | 我猜是你的围裙里面有个手指宽的”洞” |
| [02:08] | Candy hearts! Here, hold out your hand. | 心型糖果 来 把手伸出来 |
| [02:11] | Let’s get our heart on. | 咱们来尝点甜头 |
| [02:14] | I’m way ahead of you. | 我的”头”早就准备就绪 |
| [02:19] | “Be mine”… classic. What’s yours say? | “做我的爱人” 真经典 你的是什么 |
| [02:22] | “Caroline Channing is lame. | “卡洛琳·钱宁逊爆了 |
| [02:24] | “I hate you for giving me this. | 我讨厌你给我糖 |
| [02:27] | Valentine’s Day is the worst.” | 情人节去死吧” |
| [02:30] | Ooh, cinnamon. Mmm. | 哇 肉桂味的 |
| [02:37] | Good evening, Earl. | 晚上好 厄尔 |
| [02:38] | My, my, my, Sophie, | 天啊 天啊 苏菲 |
| [02:40] | seeing you in that dress makes my heart race. | 香衣配美人 我心跳加速难自持 |
| [02:42] | Two scoops of ice cream in a one scoop cone. | 腰肢如竹子 胸前结椰子 |
| [02:47] | Oh, Earl, you make me smile. | 厄尔 你真会逗我开心 |
| [02:50] | I wish we had black people in Poland when I was growing up. | 波兰要是能多点黑人就好了 |
| [02:55] | Too bad. We really would have enjoyed | 是很可惜 咱们黑人肯定会喜欢 |
| [02:57] | segregation and Hitler. | 种族隔离与希特勒呢 |
| [03:01] | Oh, hi, building neighbors. | 你们好呀 邻居们 |
| [03:04] | Well, I was just driving by, and since it was raining, | 我刚好开车经过 看到正在下雨 |
| [03:08] | I thought I could offer you two girls | 就想说用我的加长轿车 |
| [03:10] | a ride home in my town car. | 送你们俩妹子回家 |
| [03:12] | The last time someone offered me a ride, | 上次有人说要送我回家 |
| [03:13] | I ended up in a drainage pipe in Jersey. | 结果我被扔进新泽西的下水道 |
| [03:17] | Sophia, you rent a town car? | 苏菲 你租了辆加长轿车吗 |
| [03:18] | Yes, but only when it’s raining, | 对啊 不过只有在下雨的时候 |
| [03:21] | because, you know, I got hair extensions and nail extensions, | 你看 我去做了接发 接指甲 |
| [03:24] | and, you know, I… I’m too extended to walk. | 所以我…”接着”就不屑走路了 |
| [03:31] | Hello. | 你好 |
| [03:33] | I saw you from kitchen. | 我从厨房里看见你 |
| [03:35] | You turned pick-up window into painting. | 你让上菜口变得如诗如画 |
| [03:39] | Plink! | 咻 |
| [03:40] | Velvet painting of nude at counter. | 吧台上的裸体绒画 |
| [03:44] | Clamp, ouch! | 我夹 哎呦 |
| [03:49] | The girls tell me you own cleaning service. | 那俩姑娘说你有一家清洁公司 |
| [03:51] | I would like to hire you to clean my house. | 我想请你来打扫我家 |
| [03:54] | Oh, yeah, this is possible. | 没错 这个可以有 |
| [03:56] | I will send girl. What is your address? | 我会叫个姑娘去 你的地址是哪里 |
| [03:58] | I don’t want some girl. | 我不要别的姑娘 |
| [04:00] | I want you to come clean. | 我就要你来打扫 |
| [04:03] | Oh, you cannot get me to come. | 想我来 你没那本事 |
| [04:12] | Oh, I can get you to come. | 我当然有本事让你”来”[高潮] |
| [04:16] | No, I can no longer come anymore. | 不可能 我不上门[来高潮]很久了 |
| [04:22] | No, Max and Caroline can come. | 算了 麦克斯和卡洛琳可以来 |
| [04:25] | No, no, we’re not coming. | 不 不 我们才不来 |
| [04:29] | So no one can get you to come? | 所以没人能让你”来”[高潮]吗 |
| [04:33] | Well, some people can get me to come… | 当然 有些人可以让我”来” |
| [04:37] | Just not you. | 但不是你 |
| [04:41] | Hard to get… I like it. | 傲娇难泡 我喜欢 |
| [04:44] | Go get the coats. I’ll get this check. | 你去拿外套 我去结账 |
| [04:47] | Here’s the last check, Earl. | 这是最后一笔单子了 厄尔 |
| [04:49] | Oh, Max, can you take care of that for me, please? | 麦克斯 你能帮我入下帐吗 |
| [04:51] | Sure. Why? | 可以 为什么 |
| [04:52] | Uh, nothing pressing… Just having a heart attack. | 没什么急事 就是心脏病发而已 |
| [04:54] | I’ll see you tomorrow. | 明天见 |
| [04:56] | Wait, you’re having a heart attack? | 慢着 你心脏病发了 |
| [04:57] | Most definitely. | 确定肯定及一定 |
| [04:59] | I’ve had three in my life. We’re old friends. | 我这辈子病发过三次 跟老朋友一样熟 |
| [05:01] | Earl, you’re having a heart attack. | 厄尔 你可是心脏病病发呀 |
| [05:02] | I’ll be fine. Have you seen my tangerine? | 没事的 你看见我的橘子了吗 |
| [05:04] | I had a tangerine set aside for my walk home. | 我特意留个橘子 准备回家路上吃 |
| [05:07] | Forget the tangerine. | 别管那橘子了 |
| [05:08] | Earl’s having a heart attack! | 厄尔心脏病发了 |
| [05:10] | Sophie, we’re taking the town car to the hospital. | 苏菲 我们得用你的轿车送他去医院 |
| [05:13] | Earl, when did the pain start? | 厄尔 你什么时候开始疼的 |
| [05:14] | When I saw Sophie in that dress. | 我看见穿裙子的苏菲时 |
| [05:22] | Oh, hell, no! | 靠 不是吧 |
| [05:24] | Why is this line so long? Did the new iPhone come out? | 怎么这么多人排队 新iPhone出来了吗 |
| [05:26] | Let’s just get him over there. | 咱们把他扶过去吧 |
| [05:28] | Max, anything you can do to move this along? | 麦克斯 你能把这些人弄走吗 |
| [05:30] | Move! Celebrity coming through. | 走开 名人来了 |
| [05:33] | Morgan Freeman having a heart attack. | 摩根·弗里曼心脏病发了 |
| [05:37] | He is having a heart attack. | 他心脏病发了 |
| [05:38] | On a scale of one to ten, what’s your pain? | 疼痛级别从一到十 你是几级 |
| [05:41] | Uh, two, we were just in the neighborhood, | 二级 我们只是刚好经过 |
| [05:43] | looking for a place to have jell-o. | 想找个地方吃果冻 |
| [05:46] | I was talking to Morgan Freeman. | 我是在问摩根·弗里曼说话 |
| [05:48] | Take him now! | 现在就治他 |
| [05:50] | Sir, he has a history of heart trouble. | 先生 他有心脏病史 |
| [05:52] | All right, we’ll get him in. | 好吧 把他送进去 |
| [05:54] | Earl, go with the nurse. | 厄尔 跟护士去吧 |
| [05:56] | Damn, it’s a man. | 靠 居然是男护士 |
| [05:59] | We’ll be right out here, Earl. | 我们就在这等 厄尔 |
| [06:00] | Everything is gonna be okay. | 一定会没事的 |
| [06:02] | Have a seat and wait. | 去那边坐着等吧 |
| [06:03] | Look at me, gingerbread. | 看着老娘 小弱鸡 |
| [06:05] | If anything happens to him, | 如果他有什么三长两短 |
| [06:06] | I will staple your nut sack to that chair. | 我会用订书机 把你的阴囊钉在椅子上 |
| [06:27] | That’s right… it’s me again. | 没错 又是我 |
| [06:29] | For the tenth time, he’s fine. | 都说过九遍了 他没事 |
| [06:31] | He had a minor attack, but he’s in good hands. | 他只是轻微病发 也有人会妥善照顾 |
| [06:33] | I would know… I had both of my heart attacks here. | 请相信我 我在这里心脏病发过两次了 |
| [06:37] | I want to go back there and see for myself. | 我得亲自进去看了才放心 |
| [06:39] | Family members only. | 只准家属进去 |
| [06:40] | – Well, I’m his daughter. – Oh, really? | -我是他的女儿 -真的吗 |
| [06:44] | It says here he’s 75 years old… | 病历上说他已经七十五岁了 |
| [06:46] | Well, he started late. | 他晚婚晚育 |
| [06:48] | And African-American. | 还是个非裔美国人 |
| [06:50] | He started late with a honky. | 他跟个白鬼晚婚晚育不行啊 |
| [06:51] | I’m one of those combo babies. | 我就是传说中的杂交婴儿 |
| [06:55] | Here… | 给 |
| [06:55] | You need proof? | 你不是要证据吗 |
| [06:57] | My last name is Black, | 我姓布莱克[黑] |
| [06:58] | see? Max Black. | 看见没 麦克斯·布莱克 |
| [07:01] | He’s black. I’m Black. | 他是黑人 我姓黑 |
| [07:02] | It’d be dumb if we weren’t related. | 如果我们俩不是亲人 才有鬼咧 |
| [07:04] | Can I just get back to playing Angry Birds? | 我能继续玩”愤怒的小鸟”了吗 |
| [07:08] | You are yammering on here about nothing | 我此生挚爱在里面独自担惊受怕 |
| [07:09] | while the love of my life is back there alone and scared. | 而你除了会说废话 什么都不会 |
| [07:12] | You said he was your father. | 你刚说他是你的父亲 |
| [07:13] | Now he’s the love of your life? | 现在又成了你此生挚爱了 |
| [07:16] | He’s both. We’re from the South. | 两者皆是 我们是狂野的南方人 |
| [07:20] | Have a seat. | 回去坐着吧 |
| [07:23] | I got us two lattes. It took forever. | 我为了买这两杯拿铁 等了好半天 |
| [07:26] | The guy in front of me missed his kidney transplant | 我前面那哥儿们 为了等一杯摩卡星冰 |
| [07:28] | waiting for a mocha frappuccino. | 都错过了他的肾脏移植手术了 |
| [07:30] | – Any news? – The same. | -有新消息了吗 -没有 |
| [07:32] | But they won’t let me back there. | 他们也不让我进去 |
| [07:33] | I even told him Earl was my father. | 我甚至说厄尔是我父亲了 |
| [07:36] | Now’s my chance. Nurse Chewbacca’s on the move. | 机会来了 楚巴卡护士离开座位了 |
| [07:38] | I’m going back there. | 我要偷溜进去 |
| [07:39] | If you see anyone about to notice me sneak by, | 如果你发现有人注意到我 |
| [07:41] | draw all the attention to yourself. | 就帮我把大家注意力都转移到你身上 |
| [07:43] | Max, I don’t know if I can do that. | 麦克斯 我不知道我是否做得来 |
| [07:45] | You’re right. That’s kind of my thing. | 你说得对 这是我的专长 |
| [07:46] | – Okay, let me think. – You don’t have time to think. | -好的 我想想 -没时间想了 |
| [07:48] | Just throw the coffees against the wall. | 直接把咖啡扔墙上就行 |
| [07:50] | That’s ridiculous. | 这太离谱了 |
| [07:51] | I graduated top of my class at Wharton. | 我可是沃尔顿商学院的毕业尖子生 |
| [07:53] | I can do better than that. | 我的本事比这大多了 |
| [07:55] | Paging Dr. Bender. Paging Dr. Bender, please. | 呼叫本德尔医生 呼叫本德尔医生 |
| [07:59] | Oh, my God! | 天啊 |
| [08:05] | Those were not nonfat. | 这咖啡居然不是脱脂的 |
| [08:15] | Earl! | 厄尔 |
| [08:16] | – You in here? – Max, is that you? | -你在里面吗 -麦克斯 是你吗 |
| [08:21] | Ain’t you sweet? | 你真好 |
| [08:22] | But you didn’t have to wait around for me. | 但你不必等着我了 |
| [08:24] | This is Narcissus. | 这位是小水仙 |
| [08:26] | She’s from the Fiji Islands | 她来自斐济群岛 |
| [08:28] | and gives one hell of a sponge bath. | 刚刚帮我擦一个暴爽的澡 |
| [08:31] | Hi. Can we have a minute alone? | 你好 能让我们单独说句话吗 |
| [08:34] | Earl, do you think this is a good time to have a sponge bath… | 厄尔 你觉得现在让人帮你”擦澡”合适吗 |
| [08:37] | I mean, in your condition? | 就你这虚弱的小心肝 |
| [08:38] | Max, when they look like that, | 麦克斯 当护士长这样时 |
| [08:40] | there’s never a bad time for a sponge bath. | 擦澡没有合不合适 只有爽不爽 |
| [08:43] | – So are you doing okay now? – Pretty good. | -那你现在没事咯 -好得很 |
| [08:46] | The doctor said it was a mild one, | 医生说这次是轻微的 |
| [08:47] | but I’m going to have to stay here a couple nights. | 但我得留院观察几个晚上 |
| [08:50] | Could you find out how much extra for me | 你能帮我问问自己住一间 |
| [08:51] | to get my own room? | 要加多少钱吗 |
| [08:53] | A private room? | 单人房吗 |
| [08:54] | The last time I was in one of these places, | 上次我睡在这种集体病房时 |
| [08:56] | the guy in the bed next to me thought he was a parrot | 我隔壁床的家伙以为自己是鹦鹉 |
| [08:58] | and asked me for crackers the whole damn night. | 整晚都在管我要饼干 |
| [09:02] | Done. I’ll get you your own room. | 好的 我会给你找间单人间 |
| [09:04] | And don’t worry about the expenses. | 别担心钱的问题 |
| [09:05] | I got a little money stashed away for a rainy day. | 我留有点钱 以备不时之需 |
| [09:08] | I am not using your money. | 我才不用你的钱呢 |
| [09:09] | But let me guess, “rainy day” is a strain of weed? | 我猜”不时”指的是大麻的一种吧 |
| [09:12] | Now you’re getting it. | 你果然懂我 |
| [09:17] | I’ll see you later. | 晚点再来看你 |
| [09:19] | Don’t die, or I’ll kill you. | 不许死 不然我杀了你 |
| [09:23] | So what, now you want a private room? | 你又闹哪样 现在又想要间单人房了 |
| [09:25] | How’s he going to pay for that? | 他怎么付得起钱呀 |
| [09:26] | Oh, so that old man has to be the only man in America | 所以那个老人是全美国唯一一个 |
| [09:29] | who has to pay his medical bills? | 得自己掏腰包付医疗费的人吗 |
| [09:32] | Mr. Freeman’s done a lot of successful movies. | 弗里曼先生演过很多成功的电影呢 |
| [09:35] | I don’t think your sarcastic attitude is very professional. | 我觉得你这挖苦的态度太不专业了 |
| [09:38] | “Professional”? | “专业” |
| [09:39] | Um, an hour ago, your little thug friend here | 一个小时前 你的流氓朋友恐吓我说 |
| [09:42] | threatened to cut me so deep, I’d have a vagina. | 要劈我一刀 把我劈出个阴道来 |
| [09:49] | That offer still stands. | 我说到 就敢做到 |
| [09:52] | She’s upset. And vagina’s her go-to. | 她心情不好就会把阴道挂嘴边 |
| [09:55] | Well, the only reason I haven’t called security | 我之所以没叫保安 |
| [09:58] | is they were laid off two weeks ago. | 是因为他们两周前被炒鱿鱼了 |
| [10:00] | What is your name? | 请问你的大名是 |
| [10:01] | Tig. | 缇格 |
| [10:02] | And it’s fake, so good luck with that. | 是个假名 祝你好运 |
| [10:05] | Sir, you’re representing | 先生 你可是代表着 |
| [10:06] | the Shecter family wing of this hospital. | 薛柯特家族医院的形象 |
| [10:09] | My family knows the Schecters. | 我们家族认识薛柯特家族 |
| [10:11] | In fact, their son David interns here, | 事实上 他们的儿子大卫也在这实习 |
| [10:13] | and if I made a call, he would not be pleased. | 如果我给他打电话 他可会不高兴哦 |
| [10:15] | If you know them, | 如果你认识他们 |
| [10:16] | why are we talking to this lump behind a desk? | 咱们干嘛还跟前台的二货废话呀 |
| [10:20] | Suck it, red face! We’re going over your head! | 去死吧 红脸猪 我们要骑在你头上了 |
| [10:22] | How do you like me now, bitch? | 现在是不是气得牙痒痒呀 贱人 |
| [10:26] | Hey, get your phone. | 快打电话 |
| [10:27] | See if he can swing Earl a private room. | 看看他能不能给厄尔安排间单人房 |
| [10:29] | I think I still have his cell number. | 我应该还有他的号码 |
| [10:31] | We went out a few times until I realized he was serious | 我们约过几次会 后来我发现他真的 |
| [10:33] | about going down that pro Bono route. | 要走无偿服务那条路 |
| [10:35] | – Did you two have sex? – No. | -你们俩睡了吗 -没 |
| [10:36] | Sweet, that’s what you can offer him for the room. | 太棒了 人情债你可以肉偿了 |
| [10:43] | That’s amazing. | 真厉害 |
| [10:44] | Someone found a florist that delivers after midnight. | 居然还有花店大半夜送花上门 |
| [10:47] | That’s not so amazing. | 这有什么厉害的 |
| [10:48] | I know a guy named “Sticky Icky” Ricky | 我认识一个叫”粘得要死斯基”的家伙 |
| [10:50] | who delivers exclusively after midnight. | 专门半夜送货上门 |
| [10:54] | You know, I just realized this is the first Valentine’s Day | 我刚意识到这是我首个 |
| [10:56] | I won’t get flowers from my father. | 不会收到我父亲玫瑰的情人节 |
| [10:58] | Aw, that’s cute, with a big old side of creepy. | 又感人又带着一如既往的乱伦恶心 |
| [11:01] | No, it’s sweet. | 不 多贴心呀 |
| [11:03] | Every year from the time I was a baby, | 我出生后的每一年 |
| [11:05] | and even when I had boyfriends, | 即使当我有男朋友的时候 |
| [11:06] | I’d get flowers from my father with a card that says, | 我都会收到父亲送的玫瑰 卡片上写着 |
| [11:09] | “You’ll always be my Valentine.” | “你永远都是我的情人” |
| [11:11] | I got a sweet Valentine from a guy I liked in high school. | 高中时 我收到过心仪对象的情人节卡片 |
| [11:14] | It said, “I’ll give you five bucks to lift your shirt.” | 上面写着”把T恤拉起来 就给你五块钱” |
| [11:20] | Caroline… Hey, I’ll be right with you. | 卡洛琳 我马上过来 |
| [11:22] | There he is. Cuter than I remember. | 他来了 比我记忆中帅多了 |
| [11:29] | When I heard your voice mail, I couldn’t believe it. | 我听到你的语音留言时 简直不敢相信 |
| [11:31] | Yes, well, I wasn’t sure you’d want to come down, | 我也不是很确定 你是否愿意来见我 |
| [11:33] | because… you know… | 因为…你懂的 |
| [11:35] | You dumped me two years ago? | 你两年前甩了我吗 |
| [11:37] | Well, “dumped” is a strong word. | “甩”这个词有点重吧 |
| [11:39] | Tore my heart out, shook it in front of my face. | 当着我的面 把我的心撕成碎片扔掉 |
| [11:43] | That any softer? | 这样有轻点吗 |
| [11:45] | Hate to interrupt the “perfect white teeth” convention, | 抱歉打断你们”强颜欢笑假客套”的对话 |
| [11:48] | but we’re in a hurry. | 但我们赶时间 |
| [11:49] | David, this is my friend Max. | 大卫 这是我朋友麦克斯 |
| [11:51] | A friend of ours was admitted, | 我们的朋友入院了 |
| [11:52] | and we were hoping to get him a private room. | 希望你能帮他安排间单人房 |
| [11:54] | Oh, so you’re not here to return | 所以你不是来还我 |
| [11:55] | my Dartmouth t-shirt you stole from me. | 你偷走的达特茅斯大学T恤的吗 |
| [11:57] | You gave that to me. | 是你自己送我的 |
| [11:58] | No, I didn’t! I love that shirt. | 才不是 我爱死那件T恤了 |
| [12:00] | I feel like I lost custody of it in a divorce, | 感觉就像我离婚时失去了孩子的监护权 |
| [12:03] | and now I’m like a deadbeat dad. | 而现在反倒成了不付赡养费的爸爸了 |
| [12:05] | How about the room? Any chance? | 那房间呢 能行吗 |
| [12:07] | Please. Pretty please. | 拜托 求求你了 |
| [12:08] | Oh, well, since you said “pretty please,” | 好吧 既然你都开口求我了 |
| [12:10] | I’ll see what I can do. | 我看看我能做点什么 |
| [12:11] | We should be clear. We can’t pay. | 先声明一点 我们没钱 |
| [12:13] | We’re broke… both of us. | 我们破产了 我们俩都是 |
| [12:16] | But I’m sure you heard that somewhere. | 但我相信有人跟你说了 |
| [12:18] | Yeah… | 是呀 |
| [12:18] | Everywhere. | 大家都在说 |
| [12:21] | David, I hope your family didn’t lose any money | 大卫 我希望我父亲没有造成 |
| [12:23] | with my father. Did they? | 你们家族的任何损失 有吗 |
| [12:24] | Nope, still filthy rich. | 没有 我们仍旧富得流油 |
| [12:27] | And I can do my best to burn some filthy off that rich, | 我可以行行好 分点我家的油花给你 |
| [12:29] | by getting your friend a V.I.P. room. | 帮你朋友弄间贵宾房 |
| [12:32] | I’ll just drop some names. | 跟人报几个名字 |
| [12:33] | By that, I mean my own. | 其实 是报我自己的名字 |
| [12:35] | Shouldn’t be a problem. | 应该就能搞定 |
| [12:37] | I love Jews. | 我爱犹太人 |
| [12:41] | Yeah, we’re generous. Spread the word. | 没错 我们慷慨大方 麻烦广而告之 |
| [12:48] | Uh, if you wouldn’t mind giving Narcissus my whereabouts? | 可以的话 记得告诉小水仙我的去向 |
| [12:53] | Did you see the look on that desk lump’s big, red face | 我推你经过前台时 看见那二货 |
| [12:55] | when I pushed you by him? | 他又肥又红的脸上的表情吗 |
| [12:57] | I did, but I think throwing him the finger | 看见了 但我觉得对他伸中指 |
| [12:58] | was a tad out of line. | 有点小小的过分了哦 |
| [13:02] | Wow, Dr. David really hooked us up. | 哇 大卫医生真是说到做到呀 |
| [13:05] | Yeah, this is like an episode of Cribs I.C.U. Edition. | 是呀 感觉就像美剧里的重症监护病房一样 |
| [13:10] | So, Earl, what do you think? | 厄尔 你觉得怎么样 |
| [13:11] | Good lord, is that a Matisse? | 上帝呀 那是马蒂斯的作品吗 |
| [13:13] | – I believe so. – Then, mama, I’m home. | -是吧 -亲娘咧 我到家了 |
| [13:24] | Here, ladies, put these suckers in your station. | 给 女士们 把这俩棒棒糖放进你的围裙里 |
| [13:26] | I think I might get a late Valentine dinner crowd. | 等会说不定有情人节夜的二次就餐高峰期 |
| [13:29] | You also think you might get a late growth spurt, | 你还觉得你可能会迎来身高二次发育呢 |
| [13:31] | but that’s not happening either. | 但这两样都是不可能的 |
| [13:34] | At best, you’ll get three single girls | 最多会有三个单身女人 |
| [13:35] | waddling over at midnight to cry into some tapioca. | 半夜踉跄地走进来 边痛哭流涕边吃木薯 |
| [13:39] | True. I need to cut the crap. | 的确 我还是别骗自己了 |
| [13:42] | Valentine’s dinner is bust. | 情人节大餐梦破碎 |
| [13:43] | And look, I have sacrificed my manhood for no cash value. | 瞧 我牺牲了我的男子气概 却无半点盈利 |
| [13:49] | But your wings are adorable. | 可你的翅膀好可爱哟 |
| [13:51] | Yes, but matching panties are suffocating the boys. | 没错 但成套的内裤让我的”小弟们”憋死了 |
| [13:56] | Come on, close early. | 好啦 早点关门得了 |
| [13:57] | We’ve only got one table of twi-hards. | 我们只有一桌暮光脑残粉 |
| [14:00] | I want to go see Earl. | 我想去看厄尔 |
| [14:01] | Oh, what the hell? I love my man Earl, too. | 好吧 我也爱我的兄弟厄尔 |
| [14:04] | So screw it. Let’s fly over there. | 不管了 我们飞过去吧 |
| [14:10] | Ooh, this isn’t like the hospitals in Poland. | 这里跟波兰的医院真不一样 |
| [14:13] | The lights are working. | 灯居然都会亮耶 |
| [14:16] | Okay, sit down. I’ll take you in one at a time. | 好了 坐下吧 我每次带一个人进去 |
| [14:18] | All right, Cupid, you’re first. | 来 丘比特 你先来 |
| [14:24] | Oh, don’t wake him. Go back out. | 别吵醒他 快出去 |
| [14:26] | Angels. Oh, lord, no. | 天使 天啊 不要啊 |
| [14:31] | Thank God it’s you, Han. | 幸好是你 阿憨 |
| [14:32] | I saw the wings, and I thought heaven was filled | 我刚看见翅膀 还以为天堂 |
| [14:35] | with chunky Chinese cherubs and no jazz. | 全都是矮胖的中国天使 还没有爵士乐 |
| [14:40] | Oh, okay, great. I’ll see you in five. | 好 太棒了 五分钟后见 |
| [14:43] | I’m gonna go meet Dr. David. | 我约了大卫医生 |
| [14:44] | Oh, wait a second. | 等下 |
| [14:46] | If you’re going to go meet man, you need lip gloss. | 如果你要去见男人 你得来点唇彩 |
| [14:48] | Oh, thanks, Sophie. | 谢谢 苏菲 |
| [14:49] | Oh, no, no, no, no. Okay. | 别 别 别 好吧 |
| [14:57] | I have Valentine gift I want to give you. | 我有份情人节礼物要送你 |
| [15:01] | Oh, hepatitis “C”? | 丙型肝炎吗 |
| [15:04] | Happy Valentine’s Day. | 情人节快乐 |
| [15:08] | Look at me. Now look at you. | 看看我 再看看自己 |
| [15:12] | Now look at me again. | 再来看看我 |
| [15:15] | Does this look right to you? | 你觉得合适吗 搭吗 |
| [15:19] | Hard to get… I like it. | 傲娇难泡 我喜欢 |
| [15:25] | Oh, hey. So how’s your friend doing? | 你的朋友怎么样了 |
| [15:27] | Good. And thanks for that V.I.P. room. | 很好 贵宾房的事谢谢你 |
| [15:29] | He feels like a million bucks, which I’m sure is what it costs, | 他过得像个百万富翁 我相信得花不少钱吧 |
| [15:31] | so I brought you a little thank-you gift. | 所以我给你带了份谢礼 |
| [15:34] | That is not my Dartmouth shirt. | 这不是我的达特茅斯T恤 |
| [15:36] | No, that’s held hostage at the townhouse. | 对 那件衣服还被关押在别墅里呢 |
| [15:38] | This says Williamsburg. That’s where I live now. | 这件上面写着”威廉斯堡” 我现在住那里 |
| [15:40] | No way. That’s where I live. | 不是吧 我也住那里 |
| [15:42] | Yeah, I moved there just to piss my father off, | 我最初搬去那里是为了气我的父亲 |
| [15:44] | but I wound up loving it. | 但我后来爱上了那里 |
| [15:45] | I wound up loving it, too. | 我后来也爱上了那里 |
| [15:47] | Hey, maybe we could see each other there sometime… | 我们有时间可以见个面… |
| [15:49] | You know, go out? | 约个会什么的呀 |
| [15:51] | Yeah, I don’t think so. | 别想了 |
| [15:53] | I’m sorry. I’m sorry, what? | 抱歉 你刚说什么 |
| [15:57] | Look, Caroline, | 听着 卡洛琳 |
| [15:58] | it’s been really great getting to reconnect with you, but… | 能重遇你真的很开心 但… |
| [16:01] | I don’t see this happening again. | 我们之间爱火重燃是不可能的 |
| [16:04] | I mean, it’s my parents. | 我父母肯定不同意 |
| [16:06] | With your father in prison, the whole scandal, | 你父亲蹲大牢 丑闻满天飞 |
| [16:09] | I could never bring you home. | 我永远也不能带你回家 |
| [16:11] | Not even just to piss off your father? | 当是气你父亲也不行吗 |
| [16:13] | I mean, me dating Caroline Channing… | 我跟卡洛琳·钱宁约会 |
| [16:15] | What would people think? | 人们会怎么想啊 |
| [16:17] | I hope you understand. | 希望你能明白我的难处 |
| [16:18] | Oh, hey, thanks for the tee. | 对了 谢谢你的T恤 |
| [16:22] | Nice of everyone to stop by. | 大家都过来看我 真好 |
| [16:24] | Didn’t see Caroline. She busy tonight? | 没看见卡洛琳 她今晚很忙吗 |
| [16:27] | Oh, no, she’s here. | 没事 她就在这儿呢 |
| [16:28] | She’s out there running around, | 她在外面忙乎 |
| [16:29] | trying to swing a boyfriend situation with her doctor friend | 想跟那个给咱们搞了间贵宾房的 |
| [16:32] | who got us the V.I.P. hook-up. | 那个医生朋友重燃爱火呢 |
| [16:34] | What about you, Max? | 那你呢 麦克斯 |
| [16:36] | No sweetheart on Valentine’s Day. | 在情人节也没个情人 |
| [16:39] | I worry about you. | 我担心你 |
| [16:40] | Be nice if you had someone special. | 如果你有心仪对象 要对他好一点嘛 |
| [16:43] | I already do. | 现在不就是吗 |
| [16:45] | Ah, Max, I’m only going to be around another 30 or 40 years. | 麦克斯 我就只剩三四十年可以活了 |
| [16:49] | You better widen the net a bit. | 你最好把网撒大一点 |
| [16:52] | Visiting hours are up. Friends have to leave. | 探视时间到 友人请离开 |
| [16:54] | She can stay, nurse. She’s family. | 她可以留下 她是家人 |
| [16:58] | Earl, I’m family? | 厄尔 我是家人吗 |
| [16:59] | Yes, and the best kind of family. | 对 最好的那种家人 |
| [17:01] | You don’t want my money. | 你不会图我的钱 |
| [17:05] | Hey, Earl. You look really good. | 厄尔 你气色好多了 |
| [17:07] | So did you and Dr. Dave do it in a hospital closet? | 你跟大卫医生有在医院的衣橱里开搞吗 |
| [17:11] | All very “Grey’s Monotony”? | 就跟《实习医生格雷》里的套路一样 |
| [17:13] | No, that won’t be happening. | 没有 我们不可能了 |
| [17:15] | I asked him out and he said he could never date me, | 我约他出去 他说他不可能跟我约会 |
| [17:17] | because of my father and quote “what would people think?” | 因为我的父亲 还说”人们会怎么想”这种话 |
| [17:20] | I’m sorry. I’m sorry, what? | 什么 你说什么 |
| [17:22] | I feel like I was just hit | 我感觉好像被撞死丘比特 |
| [17:23] | by the same mack truck that killed Cupid. | 那辆重型卡车碾过一样 |
| [17:26] | Well, somebody’s about to get hit by a truck… | 现在有人真要被卡车撞了 |
| [17:28] | A Max truck. | 麦克斯超大型卡车 |
| [17:33] | Hey, you, Dr. I-Forget-Your-Name. | 喂 就是你 我不记得你名字医生 |
| [17:36] | How? It’s written on every wall. | 怎么可能 我的名字随处可见 |
| [17:39] | Okay, Dr. Exit. | 好吧 出口医生 |
| [17:43] | What is wrong with you? | 你有什么毛病 |
| [17:44] | Doctors are supposed to be sensitive. | 医生不是都很善解人意的嘛 |
| [17:46] | I mean, it’s Valentine’s Day, and she has nothing. | 今天是情人节 她一无所有 |
| [17:49] | Couldn’t you be like every other guy on the planet | 你就不能像其他男人那样 |
| [17:51] | and just lead her on and not call her the next day? | 先哄她上她 隔天再断绝联系吗 |
| [17:54] | That is the decent thing to do. | 这才是得体的做法 |
| [17:56] | And for the record, she is so hopped up on candy hearts, | 顺便告诉你一声 心型糖果让她昏了头 |
| [17:59] | you would have gotten some tonight, fo’ sho! | 你今晚本可以尝到”甜头”的 真的 |
| [18:03] | You just made the biggest mistake of your life. | 你刚犯下了这辈子最大的错误 |
| [18:07] | Well, I guess nobody knows me better than you, | 我猜你比任何人都了解我 |
| [18:08] | girl I’ve never met before. | 这位素未谋面的姑娘 |
| [18:12] | And now I would like to speak to the pro bono part of you, | 现在我想跟做无偿服务的那个你谈谈 |
| [18:14] | who understands that nothing I just said | 他会理解我刚才说的话 |
| [18:16] | should affect that man in the V.I.P. room. | 不会去迁怒贵宾房里的那个人 |
| [18:18] | That was actually a very cool thing to do. | 你帮我们安排病房的行为 的确很酷 |
| [18:20] | Earl is fine. Don’t worry. | 厄尔没事 别担心 |
| [18:21] | And as far as Caroline goes, I’m sorry, but… | 至于卡洛琳的部分 抱歉 |
| [18:24] | Her father hurt a lot of people. | 可她的父亲伤害了很多人 |
| [18:26] | Whatever you put out there comes back to you. | 善有善报 恶有恶报 |
| [18:36] | What now… | 又怎么了 |
| [18:37] | you gonna threaten to feed me my nipples again? | 你又想恐吓我 要把我的乳头塞我嘴里吗 |
| [18:42] | No. | 不是 |
| [18:43] | Actually, someone just said something | 其实是因为刚才有人说 |
| [18:44] | about the things you do coming back to you, | 善有善报 恶有恶报 |
| [18:47] | and I decided the smart move was to apologize. | 所以我决定应该放聪明点来跟你道歉 |
| [18:50] | Thanks, but it’s not necessary. | 多谢 但没必要 |
| [18:53] | Actually, you’re the nicest person I’ve dealt with tonight. | 其实你是今晚我碰过对我最好的人了 |
| [18:58] | Ugh. Rough job, dude. | 苦差事啊 伙计 |
| [19:00] | Here, Happy Valentine’s Day. | 给 情人节快乐 |
| [19:04] | You want to go out sometime? | 你想找个时间出来坐坐吗 |
| [19:08] | Why would… | 我干嘛要… |
| [19:09] | Yeah, give me your number. I’ll call you tomorrow. | 好啊 号码给我 我明天打给你 |
| [19:19] | Sleeping in that hospital chair all night | 在医院的椅子上睡一整夜 |
| [19:20] | wasn’t that uncomfortable. | 也没那么难受嘛 |
| [19:22] | No, the chairs weren’t. | 对 椅子还好 |
| [19:23] | Your sad Valentine whimpering was. | 让人难受的是 你的情人节啜泣 |
| [19:27] | – So how you feeling this morning? – Pretty good, | -你今天早上感觉好点了吗 -好多了 |
| [19:29] | considering I survived the very first Valentine’s Day | 鉴于我撑过了没有父亲送花的 |
| [19:32] | I didn’t get flowers from my father. | 第一个情人节 |
| [19:36] | So you got one year under your belt. | 所以你度过了首个无爱的一年嘛 |
| [19:38] | Don’t get so cocky. | 别太骄傲 |
| [19:39] | You still have to make 23 more to tie me. | 你还有二十三年才能追平我呢 |
| [19:42] | You know, all this time, I’ve been feeling sorry for you | 一直以来 我都为你觉得惋惜 |
| [19:46] | ’cause you didn’t know your father, | 因为你不认识自己的父亲 |
| [19:47] | but after seeing how you took care of Earl… | 但看见你对厄尔悉心照料后 |
| [19:51] | I feel sorry for your father that he didn’t know you. | 我为你父亲不认识自己的女儿而惋惜 |
| [19:54] | You would have been a wonderful daughter. | 你会是一个好女儿 |
| [19:58] | Don’t hold that thought. | 千万别这么想 |
| [20:00] | I don’t want to cry till after we break open the tapioca. | 没坐到木薯粉前 我可不哭 |
| [20:08] | No, I didn’t just win a beauty contest. | 不是的 我没获得选美比赛冠军 |
| [20:13] | No, these were left on the front doorstep. | 这些是我在前门楼梯上发现的 |
| [20:15] | They’re both addressed to Caroline. | 都是送给卡洛琳的 |
| [20:16] | – Sorry, Max. – Oh, no, that’s cool. | -抱歉 麦克斯 -没关系 |
| [20:18] | Wouldn’t want to break my winning streak. | 这样我才能保持”连续无花记录” |
| [20:21] | Oh, well, just look at it this way. | 你可以这么想嘛 |
| [20:24] | She got the flowers. You got the knockers. | 花是她的 我是你的 |
| [20:30] | All right, girls, | 好啦 姑娘们 |
| [20:31] | well, I’m off to buy scratchers | 我得去买痒痒挠了 |
| [20:32] | before all the Puerto Ricans get them. | 不然都被波多黎各人买走了 |
| [20:39] | “You’ll always be my Valentine. | “你永远都是我的情人 |
| [20:40] | Love, Daddy.” | 爱你的爸爸” |
| [20:44] | The other one from Dr. Dave? | 另一束是大卫医生送的吗 |
| [20:45] | Change his mind after I tore him a new one? | 在我撕碎他的心后 改变心意了吗 |
| [20:48] | It’s from my father as well, but it’s written to you. | 也是我父亲送的 不过是给你的 |
| [20:53] | “Thank you for taking such good care of my sweetheart. | “谢谢你对我的宝贝照顾有加 |
| [20:56] | M. Channing.” | 马丁·钱宁” |
| [20:57] | That is so sweet. | 真贴心 |
| [20:59] | Roses from a man. | 男人送的玫瑰花 |
| [21:02] | Now I’m starting to get it. | 现在我算懂了 |
| [21:04] | Is it weird that I kind of want to have sex with your dad? | 如果我说我想跟你老爸上床 会很怪吗 |
| [21:11] | Plink! | 咻 |