| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Max. | 麦克斯 |
| [00:01] | It’s the woman at table 2’s 50th birthday | 二号桌的女士今天五十大寿 |
| [00:03] | and her husband wants us to sing to her. | 她丈夫请咱们帮忙唱生日歌 |
| [00:05] | If I had a dollar every time a man asked me | 每次帮男人对他老婆”做件事” |
| [00:06] | to do something to his wife, | 就有一块钱的话 |
| [00:08] | I’d be a millionaire. | 那姐早是百万富翁了 |
| [00:11] | I remember when Happy Birthday first came up. | 我还记得生日歌刚出来那会儿呢 |
| [00:15] | I never thought it would catch on. | 真没想到它居然能传唱至今 |
| [00:18] | Go! | 快去 |
| [00:18] | And smile. | 真心的微笑 |
| [00:20] | When you fake smile, | 你以假笑对世界 |
| [00:21] | everybody else fakes smile back. | 世界会回报以假笑 |
| [00:26] | Nobody wants to hear that lame song. | 没人会想听这首恶俗的歌 |
| [00:28] | If we want to humiliate her in public, | 要想在公众场合羞辱她 |
| [00:29] | why don’t we go over there and pull her top down? | 直接扯掉她上衣不更好吗 |
| [00:32] | Come on, let’s just go sing and make the best of it. | 来嘛 咱们就过去好好唱一下 |
| [00:36] | Hi. Ready? | 你们好 准备好了吗 |
| [00:38] | One, two, three… | 一 二 三 |
| [00:39] | Happy birthday to you… | 祝你生日快乐 |
| [00:46] | Whoa! | 搞毛啊 |
| [00:49] | Ma’am, I apologize. | 女士 我郑重向您道歉 |
| [00:52] | It’s hard enough your husband took you to a diner on your birthday | 被老公带来破餐馆过生日已经够不堪了 |
| [00:54] | and now you have to listen to white Mariah? | 不能再让您忍受白人版玛丽亚·凯莉的折磨 |
| [00:57] | No! | 门都没有 |
| [01:00] | Cupcake’s on me. | 小蛋糕算我送的 |
| [01:03] | To yoooooooou | 快乐哈 |
| [01:26] | I have announcement to make. | 我有要事要宣布 |
| [01:28] | I agree with what Max said before. | 我同意麦克斯之前说的 |
| [01:31] | What? That we should tie a little bell around you, | 哪句 应该在你身上系个猫铃铛 |
| [01:32] | so we know when you’re near? | 好知道你何时在附近吗 |
| [01:36] | That’s the happy birthday song is very lame. | 是你说生日歌很恶俗这句 |
| [01:39] | The diner needs a fresh, new way | 餐馆需要全新的方式 |
| [01:41] | to celebrate the customer birthday. | 来帮顾客庆祝生日 |
| [01:43] | So I just went and wrote a special song. | 所以我写了一首特别的歌 |
| [01:46] | Han, I’d be happy to look at what you’ve written so far. | 憨 我很乐意过目下你的成果 |
| [01:48] | I took music theory in college. | 我大学的时候学过乐理 |
| [01:50] | I once wrote an entire original musical | 我曾以法国大革命为背景 |
| [01:52] | based on the French revolution. | 独家写了一整出音乐剧 |
| [01:54] | Um, sorry to step on your nerd turf, | 抱歉 要踏入你们书呆的领域 |
| [01:56] | but Les Mis is already a musical about the French revolution. | 但关于法国大革命的音乐剧 早有《悲惨世界》在先 |
| [01:56] | 《悲惨世界》讲述穷苦的主人公因获释后试图赎罪的历程 于上世纪八十年代被改编成音乐剧 | |
| [01:59] | Yes, but mine was from the point of view of the rich. | 是啊 但我的是从富人的角度出发 |
| [02:03] | What are you going to rewrite next– | 那你下一部要改写什么… |
| [02:05] | the musical Rent from the point of view of the landlord? | 地主角度版的《吉屋出租》吗 |
| [02:10] | Han, this is a lovely start, but– | 憨 开头不错 但… |
| [02:12] | A lovely start? | 开头不错 |
| [02:13] | No, I mean, it’s good. | 不 我是称赞开头挺好 |
| [02:15] | But not good enough. | 但是不够好 |
| [02:16] | I know what you are saying. | 我知道你想说什么 |
| [02:17] | “You need to practice more, Han. | “憨 你得多加练习” |
| [02:19] | “You never will be as good as your sister, Han. | “憨 你永远都比不上你的姐姐” |
| [02:22] | “Whole family going on vacation | “憨 我们举家去旅游时” |
| [02:23] | without you while you practice, Han.” | “你就乖乖留在家练习吧” |
| [02:25] | Back off, tiger mom! | 滚开 虎妈 |
| [02:25] | 源自于《虎妈战歌》 指用严格的东方式教育来养育孩子的母亲 | |
| [02:30] | Hey, Caroline, is Max around? | 卡洛琳 麦克斯在吗 |
| [02:32] | Um, she might be. I’ll go check. | 可能在 我去看看 |
| [02:36] | You’ll never guess who just came into the restaurant. | 你做梦也想不到谁来了 |
| [02:38] | You’ll be very happy. | 你会开心死的 |
| [02:40] | Gary, the fat guy from Teen Mom? | 加里 《少女妈妈》里面那个胖子吗 |
| [02:42] | Someone you like, someone you want to kiss, | 让你喜欢 让你双唇欲动 |
| [02:45] | someone you’re hot for. | 让你欲火焚身的那位 |
| [02:46] | Tyler, the skinny guy from Teen Mom? | 泰勒 《少女妈妈》里面那个瘦子吗 |
| [02:50] | What’s Johnny doing here? | 强尼来这儿干嘛 |
| [02:51] | I told him not to show his face unless– | 我告诉他不要来 除非… |
| [02:52] | Unless he broke up with his girlfriend. | 除非他跟女朋友分手了 |
| [02:54] | And now he’s here, showing his face, | 所以现在他来了 有脸来见你了 |
| [02:56] | – which means– – You can’t know that for sure. | -也就是说 -你又不能确定 |
| [02:58] | Fine. Tell me one other reason he could possibly be in here. | 好吧 那你告诉我他来这的其他原因 |
| [03:01] | He needs Han to solve a complex math problem? | 他需要憨帮忙解一道复杂的数学题 |
| [03:03] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
| [03:05] | Max, it’s pretty obvious that he’s in here | 麦克斯 显然他来这儿 |
| [03:06] | because he broke up with his girlfriend “Cassandra” | 是因为他跟女友卡桑德拉分手了 |
| [03:08] | I mean, what else could it be? | 不然还有什么原因啊 |
| [03:10] | When I had millions of dollars, | 当我还是个百万富翁时 |
| [03:11] | I had no idea why guys were coming to see me. | 我无法确定男人来找我的真正原因 |
| [03:13] | “Do they want me, or do they want my money?” | “他们是爱我呢 还是爱我的钱呢” |
| [03:15] | But you have nothing! | 但你一无所有 |
| [03:16] | So basically that just leaves you. | 所以也只能是因为你这个人了 |
| [03:19] | Way to puff me up before I go through that door. | 在我出去前 你这话还真是够”鼓舞人心”啊 |
| [03:22] | This is so exciting. | 好兴奋啊 |
| [03:23] | Will you stop? Don’t be such a girl. | 你有完没完 别跟怀春少女似的 |
| [03:26] | Hair? Teeth? Anything? | 头发 牙齿 有哪里不好吗 |
| [03:28] | You’re good. | 没问题的 |
| [03:30] | Wait. | 等等 |
| [03:34] | More. | 开大点 |
| [03:38] | – Really? – Trust me. | -真的吗 -相信我 |
| [03:48] | Oh, uh, hey, Johnny. When did you get here? | 强尼 你什么时候过来的 |
| [03:50] | Uh, just now. | 就刚刚 |
| [03:51] | I, uh–I came here | 我之所以过来 |
| [03:52] | because I want to tell you something. | 是有话要对你说 |
| [03:54] | Yes? | 什么话 |
| [03:57] | Max, I think you and I have something special. | 麦克斯 我觉得咱俩的情谊很特别 |
| [04:00] | And I don’t want to lose that. | 我不想失去它 |
| [04:02] | So I came down here to ask… | 所以我来问你一句 |
| [04:05] | Even though it didn’t work out, | 即使做不成情侣 |
| [04:07] | can we still be friends? | 我们还能做朋友吗 |
| [04:10] | What? | 什么 |
| [04:10] | You have got to be kidding! | 你开什么玩笑 |
| [04:14] | What’s going on over there, Caroline? | 卡洛琳 发生什么事了 |
| [04:16] | My friend Johnny and I have no idea | 我和我的朋友强尼完全不知道 |
| [04:17] | what you’re upset about. | 你在不爽什么 |
| [04:19] | I was just reacting to the news that we’re out of pie. | 我在不爽店里的派居然没有了 |
| [04:22] | I really cannot believe it. | 真是让人难以置信 |
| [04:24] | I totally thought it would go a different way. | 跟我想的完全不一样 |
| [04:26] | Caroline… | 卡洛琳 |
| [04:28] | Why don’t you go over there to the pie carrousel | 你为什么不去放派的转盘那儿 |
| [04:30] | and mourn the loss of our pie? | 好好哀悼一下我们失去的派呢 |
| [04:35] | So, we’re cool? | 那我们没事吧 |
| [04:37] | Yeah, we’re cool. Why wouldn’t we be? | 对 没事 为什么会有事呀 |
| [04:39] | We never dated or anything like that. | 我们又没有正式约过会啥的 |
| [04:40] | Of course we’re friends. | 当然是朋友啦 |
| [04:42] | I am so relieved. | 这让我如释重负 |
| [04:43] | So, uh, you gonna go back | 所以你还会像以前一样 |
| [04:45] | to busting my balls, like always? | 用拳猛击我的蛋蛋吗[开我玩笑] |
| [04:47] | Yes. | 会呀 |
| [04:49] | We’re such good friends, I might just… | 我们关系好到我都恨不得… |
| [04:51] | bust them with my feet! | 用脚狠踹你的蛋蛋 |
| [04:58] | Good morning. | 早安 |
| [04:59] | I’m trying to send out a get-to-know-us email blast | 我想把介绍我们蛋糕店的广告邮件 |
| [05:01] | for the cupcake business. | 群发出去 |
| [05:03] | But your wi-fi is so slow. | 但是你的无线网慢得要死 |
| [05:04] | Don’t tell me– tell Cathyhome17, | 跟我说没用 跟”凯丝家十七号”抱怨去 |
| [05:07] | whoever and wherever she is. | 反正我不认识她 |
| [05:09] | Okay, well, I’m just going to run down to | 好吧 反正我要去楼下 |
| [05:10] | the coffee place and send it. | 用咖啡店的网发了 |
| [05:11] | Do you approve? | 你觉得呢 |
| [05:13] | Nice job. The font’s pretty. | 干得不错 字体挺漂亮 |
| [05:15] | You just gave me a compliment? | 你刚是在夸奖我吗 |
| [05:16] | I knew it– you’re depressed. | 我就知道 你心里难受 |
| [05:18] | You’re so depressed about you and Johnny just being friends, | 只能跟强尼做朋友 让你心里难受到 |
| [05:20] | you don’t even have the energy to be you. | 连做自己的精力都没有了 |
| [05:22] | What? The font is pretty. | 瞎说什么 字体的确漂亮呀 |
| [05:24] | Oh, honey, do you want a hug? | 天啊 亲爱的 想来个爱的抱抱吗 |
| [05:27] | – I’m fine. – How could you be fine? | -我没事 -你怎么可能没事 |
| [05:29] | The man was so into you, | 这个男人曾经这么喜欢你 |
| [05:31] | he painted a billboard of the two of you kissing. | 他在广告看板上画了你俩的接吻图 |
| [05:33] | And now he just wants to be friends? | 而现在他却只想跟你做朋友 |
| [05:35] | Please call in sick to your babysitting job | 别去当保姆了 打个电话请病假 |
| [05:37] | and take to the bed. | 然后上床睡觉吧 |
| [05:38] | Whenever I used to get depressed, | 以前每当我不开心 |
| [05:39] | I’d take to the bed. | 我就去床上赖着 |
| [05:40] | One time, I took to the bed for a week. | 有一次 我在床上赖了整整一周 |
| [05:42] | Listen, unlike you, Jane Austen, | 听着 我不像你 简·奥斯汀 |
| [05:42] | 简·奥斯汀 英国著名女性小说家 代表作《傲慢与偏见》 死前一直卧病在床 | |
| [05:45] | I will never take to the bed. | 我绝对不会卧床不起 |
| [05:47] | Giving in to feelings is for rich people. | 有钱人才有空玩失恋 |
| [05:49] | Regular people just have to get up, | 普通人只能起床 |
| [05:51] | get drunk, and go fulfill their babysitting duties. | 灌醉自己 然后去尽他们保姆的本分 |
| [05:55] | Max, take to the bed. | 麦克斯 去床上睡觉吧 |
| [05:57] | Look, this is my pattern, okay? | 这就是我的套路可以了吧 |
| [05:59] | I fall for the wrong guy, | 我爱上不该爱的人 |
| [06:01] | I find out they’re with a girl, a bottle, or a needle, | 发现他们跟女人 酒精 毒品纠缠不清 |
| [06:03] | and I move on. | 我唯有抽离 |
| [06:04] | And sometimes I use a bottle to help me do it… | 所以有时我也借助酒精帮忙 |
| [06:06] | or a needle or a girl. | 或者是毒品 或女人 |
| [06:11] | But when I’m done, I’m done. | 但我一旦看开 就真的放下了 |
| [06:12] | That’s it? | 就这样 |
| [06:13] | You’re just over it? | 你就能放下了吗 |
| [06:16] | I’m still sad because Kyle Enright | 我至今还放不下凯尔·恩莱特 |
| [06:18] | didn’t invite me on his private jet | 没有邀请我乘坐他的私人飞机 |
| [06:19] | to Mykonos for his 12th birthday. | 去米科诺斯岛过他十二岁生日这件事 |
| [06:22] | Well, not me. | 我不一样 |
| [06:24] | Just flip a switch and those feelings are gone. | 只要按个开关 那些感觉就消失殆尽 |
| [06:26] | I only have two switches in my life– | 我人生只有两个开关 |
| [06:28] | one turns off my emotions, | 一个关掉我的情绪 |
| [06:30] | the other makes a car bounce. | 另一个能让”车震”动 |
| [06:34] | Okay, I better go. | 好吧 我该走了 |
| [06:35] | If you get there after 10:30, you can’t hear yourself think | 十点半过后去 会被吵的事都做不了 |
| [06:38] | over the sounds of people skyping to the Philippines. | 会有一堆跟自己菲律宾老乡玩语聊的人 |
| [06:43] | Max, are you sure you’re all right? | 麦克斯 你确定你没事吗 |
| [06:46] | Max. | 麦克斯 |
| [06:48] | Are you about to come over here and soft-touch me? | 你是想过来轻抚 爱抚我吗 |
| [06:51] | – I want to so bad. – Leave! | -我超级想 -快滚蛋 |
| [06:53] | Go to the coffee place. Soft-touch the barista. | 去咖啡店 轻抚做咖啡的去 |
| [07:04] | Excuse me, Miss. | 打扰一下 小姐 |
| [07:06] | You keep your door open like that, | 你这样门户大开 |
| [07:07] | this rat’s probably going to get inside. | 这只老鼠很可能会趁机溜进去哦 |
| [07:10] | Don’t worry. You should see the size of my cat. | 你放心 我家的猫更大只 |
| [07:13] | What are you doing here? | 你来这儿干嘛 |
| [07:14] | I knew you’d be home for another hour, | 我知道你还有一个小时才出门 |
| [07:16] | so I brought you coffee. | 所以我给你买了杯咖啡 |
| [07:17] | And I wanted to say… | 我想说 |
| [07:20] | Thanks for understanding the situation. | 感谢你能理解我们的状况 |
| [07:22] | Hey, you don’t need to get all | 你不必搞什么 |
| [07:24] | “Hallmark presents: Johnny Soft Eyes” on me. | “贺曼出品 强尼牌温柔眼神” |
| [07:27] | Okay? You’re not my type, anyway. | 行吗 况且你又不是我的菜 |
| [07:28] | You’re a bartender who’s close to liquor all night | 你只是个整晚守着酒的酒保而已 |
| [07:30] | and your not an alcoholic. | 而且你还不嗜酒 |
| [07:32] | So clearly you don’t know how to seize an opportunity. | 显然你不是懂得把握机会的人 |
| [07:37] | Yes, I do. | 其实我懂 |
| [07:48] | This is where you join in birthday song | 你从这里加入 用你美妙的萨克斯风 |
| [07:50] | with your sweet-ass saxophone. | 来吹奏这生日歌 |
| [07:53] | Han, I like you, brother, | 憨 我喜欢你 兄弟 |
| [07:55] | but I played with everyone | 但我也跟大牌合作过 |
| [07:56] | from Marvin Gaye to the gay Marvins. | 马文·盖伊到马文基佬[与盖伊音似] |
| [08:00] | They never made it–a little bit ahead of their time. | 不过马文基佬未能成名 他们生错了时代 |
| [08:04] | But if you don’t mind a professional opinion, man, | 如果你不介意听听专业意见的话… |
| [08:06] | you’ve got to put some heart into this thing. | 你的音乐需要更用心 放入感情去做啊 |
| [08:09] | But my mother always say to run away from heart– | 可我母亲总是让我不要放感情 |
| [08:12] | only the head can make music. | 只有脑子才能做出好音乐 |
| [08:14] | Han, your mother sounds like one cold– | 憨 你母亲听上去像个冷酷… |
| [08:16] | Don’t you talk about my mama! | 不许你这样说我老妈 |
| [08:21] | Hey, Earl. What’s up? | 厄尔 怎么啦 |
| [08:22] | I just got threatened by | 我刚被看儿童电影 |
| [08:24] | a man who gets carded at Pixar movies. | 都会被查年龄的人给恐吓了 |
| [08:28] | Max, great news– | 麦克斯 好消息 |
| [08:29] | that email blast I sent out this morning worked. | 我今早发出去的邮件广告有成果了 |
| [08:31] | I just got us a big cupcake job | 我帮咱们拉了一笔大单子 |
| [08:33] | at some event place called The Gold Space Loft. | 在某个叫藏金阁的地方 |
| [08:36] | Last time I was at the Gold Space Loft, | 上次我去藏金阁时 |
| [08:37] | I went to a poetry slam, and I wound up slamming a poet. | 是去诗歌”辩”论 结果跟一个诗人”变”到床上了 |
| [08:42] | They need 100 cupcakes by tomorrow night. | 他们明晚要一百个蛋糕 |
| [08:44] | And because I’m a genius, | 由于我是个天才 |
| [08:45] | and also because it’s such short notice– | 同时也因为时间紧急 |
| [08:47] | but mostly because I’m a genius– | 但大部分是因为我是个天才 |
| [08:48] | I got them up to $500. | 我把价格涨到了五百 |
| [08:50] | It’s a cool group art show– | 是一个很酷的团体艺术展 |
| [08:52] | very Williamsburg, very pot brownie. | 本土特色与大麻糕点兼备 |
| [08:56] | And Johnny has a piece in it. | 而且强尼也有作品展出 |
| [08:57] | And since you flipped your switch, | 反正你关掉了你的开关 |
| [08:58] | I figured it’d be fine. | 我想应该没问题 |
| [09:00] | No way. I can’t make 100 cupcakes in a day. | 不行 我一天做不出一百个蛋糕 |
| [09:04] | Max, I know it’s a lot of work, | 麦克斯 我知道这费时费力 |
| [09:05] | but I’ll do whatever I can to help. | 但我会尽我所能去帮你的 |
| [09:07] | This is a really big opportunity for us. | 这对咱俩来说是一次大机会 |
| [09:10] | I kissed Johnny. | 我跟强尼接吻了 |
| [09:11] | What? When? | 什么 何时 |
| [09:12] | He came by the apartment right after you left. | 你前脚踏出公寓 他后脚就进来了 |
| [09:15] | I was only gone 20 minutes. | 我才离开了二十分钟 |
| [09:16] | What’d you do–shine a bat symbol on your vagina? | 你是在下阴弄了个召唤蝙蝠侠标志吗 |
| [09:21] | Stop acting like I wanted it to happen. | 别说得好像我很希望这事发生一样 |
| [09:23] | I didn’t want it to happen. I’m lucky we just kissed. | 我也不想这样 幸好我们只是接吻了 |
| [09:26] | My pants kept saying, “Take me off!” | 我的裤子一直在狂喊”快扒我” |
| [09:28] | And I’m like, “No, pants.” | 我怒吼”不行 贱人” |
| [09:31] | I’m telling you, I almost couldn’t help myself. | 告诉你 我当时差点把持不住 |
| [09:35] | I don’t understand. | 我不明白 |
| [09:36] | I thought you said you were done with him. | 我以为你说你已经对他没感觉了 |
| [09:38] | What happened to your pattern? | 你的套路扔到九霄云外了吗 |
| [09:39] | Telling people I have a pattern is part of the pattern. | 告诉别人我的套路也是我套路的一部分 |
| [09:41] | Then I just go and do whatever I want. | 然后我就随心所欲想干嘛就干嘛 |
| [09:43] | I knew it, I thought it, I should have said it– | 我早就知道 我早就猜到 我早就该把话说出口 |
| [09:45] | girls cannot be friends with guys. | 男女之间就不可能有纯友谊 |
| [09:47] | Yeah, well, you also knew he was coming in here | 是啊 你还”知道”他来找我 |
| [09:48] | to tell me he broke up with his girlfriend. | 是想告诉我 他跟他女朋友分手了呢 |
| [09:50] | So you can suck it. | 你省省吧 |
| [09:52] | Did he say he was going to break up with her? | 那他是要跟女朋友分手吗 |
| [09:54] | We didn’t get into it. | 我们没说到这个 |
| [09:55] | We weren’t really using our mouths for talking. | 我们的嘴巴当时很忙 好吗 |
| [09:58] | What do you think’s going to happen? | 那你觉得接下来会发生什么 |
| [09:59] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [10:00] | All I know is it’s not going to happen at a public art show | 不会在一个公开的艺术展发生什么 |
| [10:03] | in front of him and his beautiful, cool British girlfriend. | 也不会在他们一起时发生任何事 |
| [10:05] | Max, you don’t even have to see them. | 麦克斯 你根本不用见到他们 |
| [10:07] | We’ll get there early, we’ll drop off the cupcakes, | 我们早早去那儿 把蛋糕放下 |
| [10:09] | and be gone before any of the artists even show up. | 在艺术家们出现之前 就功成身退了 |
| [10:11] | Great. I’m going home tonight | 很好 姐连上十个小时班 |
| [10:13] | after my ten-hour waitress shift, | 晚上下班回家 |
| [10:15] | to stay up all night and bake 100 cupcakes | 还得通宵烤一百个小蛋糕 |
| [10:17] | for a guy I kissed who has a girlfriend. | 就为了一个背着女友和我接吻的男人 |
| [10:19] | Beep. | 哔 |
| [10:20] | Ooh, what’s that? My self-esteem just flatlined. | 什么声音 原来是我的自尊阵亡的声音 |
| [10:26] | Yeah, it’s this way. | 对 往这儿走 |
| [10:28] | I smell patchouli and pretension. | 我闻到一股广藿香和自命不凡的味道 |
| [10:31] | Why are you walking so slow? | 你干嘛走得小心翼翼 |
| [10:32] | Because I’m carrying our cupcake future, | 因为我拿着的是我们的未来 |
| [10:34] | and I don’t want half of our future’s frosting | 我可不想我们未来的一半糖霜 |
| [10:36] | to be on top of the box. | 沾到盒子顶上 |
| [10:37] | Relax. We still have time. | 别紧张 我们还有时间 |
| [10:40] | Oh, hello. | 你好 |
| [10:41] | Welcome to space blast art attack. | 欢迎来到狂轰滥炸艺术展 |
| [10:42] | The gallery won’t be open for, like, an hour. | 画廊还有大概一个小时才开门迎客 |
| [10:44] | Actually, we’re here delivering the cupcakes. | 其实我们是来送小蛋糕的 |
| [10:46] | We’re looking for someone named Traivor. | 我们想找崔毁 |
| [10:48] | And I’m looking for Traivor’s mom, | 我是来找崔毁他妈 |
| [10:49] | to ask her why she named a person Traivor. | 想问问为什么会取这么个名字 |
| [10:52] | Traive! | 小崔 |
| [10:54] | You girls can set up inside. | 你们俩先进来弄吧 |
| [10:55] | He’s the one with the super-tall hat. | 戴着个超级高帽的人就是他 |
| [10:59] | I love galleries. | 我爱画廊 |
| [11:01] | My father and I had an art foundation. | 我父亲和我曾有一个艺术基金会 |
| [11:02] | We taught blind kids how to do ceramics. | 用来教盲童陶艺 |
| [11:05] | Why didn’t you just buy them eyes? | 这么有钱直接给他们买眼睛就好啦 |
| [11:08] | Let’s put them here. | 把蛋糕放这儿 |
| [11:10] | This art show is ridiculous– | 这个艺术展真可笑 |
| [11:11] | someone named Traivor, | 一个叫崔毁的人 |
| [11:13] | a dreamcatcher with buzzwords stuck in it. | 捕梦网里塞着各种流行语 |
| [11:17] | And you. | 还有你 |
| [11:19] | Why would he hang that picture of us | 他还没跟女朋友分手 |
| [11:21] | if he still has a girlfriend? | 为什么要把我俩的画挂出来 |
| [11:22] | Maybe he went home and broke up with her | 或许在你俩接吻后 |
| [11:23] | after he kissed you. | 他回去就分手了呢 |
| [11:24] | The writing is literally on the wall. | 正所谓白纸黑字 有凭有据啊 |
| [11:26] | Oh, no, no, no. I’m not falling for you again. | 不 不 我不会再相信你了 |
| [11:28] | Let’s just get our money and go. | 咱们把钱收一收快闪吧 |
| [11:31] | Grown lady dressed like a doll, | 这位装萝莉的大姐 |
| [11:34] | we can’t find tall hat, | 我们找不到高帽子男 |
| [11:36] | and we need to get paid for the cupcakes and leave. | 麻烦结下蛋糕钱 我们好走人 |
| [11:38] | Leave? What are you talking about. | 走人 你们在说什么啊 |
| [11:39] | – You’re serving the cupcakes. – Pardon? | -你们得负责端蛋糕 -什么 |
| [11:42] | Well, why do you think we’re paying you $500 for cupcakes? | 不然我们为什么要付你们五百大洋 |
| [11:45] | Because my friend’s a genius. | 因为我朋友实在是个天才 |
| [11:49] | This is new information. | 这个消息太突然了 |
| [11:50] | We need to talk to someone. Traive! | 我们得跟人商量一下 小崔 |
| [11:53] | Oh, no. Traive is busy installing his ice penis. | 不行 小崔正忙着弄冰雕阳具呢 |
| [11:56] | I could get someone else on the show committee to help. | 我帮你找另一个负责人吧 |
| [11:59] | Cashandra! | 卡珊德拉 |
| [12:00] | What’s his girlfriend doing here? | 她女朋友在这儿干嘛 |
| [12:02] | Oh, God! | 天啊 |
| [12:03] | What if soft eyes wussed out and told her what happened? | 万一温柔眼露馅全招了怎么办 |
| [12:05] | – Does she look mad? – No, she looks amazing. | -她看起来火冒三丈吗 -她看起来明艳照人 |
| [12:08] | Max, hello. | 麦克斯 你好呀 |
| [12:10] | We met that one time on the street. | 我们有次在街上见过 |
| [12:11] | Cashandra, Johnny’s girlfriend. | 我是卡珊德拉 强尼的女朋友 |
| [12:13] | Oh, hi, hi. I’m Johnny’s friend. | 你好你好 我是强尼的朋友 |
| [12:14] | We’re just friends. | 我们只是朋友 |
| [12:17] | Hi, “Cassandra.” I’m Caroline. | 你好 “卡桑德拉” 我是卡洛琳 |
| [12:18] | I was with Max on the street. | 那天我也跟麦克斯在一起 |
| [12:19] | And all day yesterday. | 昨天一天是 |
| [12:21] | We were together every minute. | 我们每时每刻都在一起 |
| [12:23] | It’s Cash-andra, actually. | 其实我叫卡珊德拉 |
| [12:25] | But everyone calls me Cash. | 但人人都叫我卡珊 |
| [12:26] | And you’re Max’s business partner, right? | 你是麦克斯的商业伙伴 对吗 |
| [12:28] | Yeah, but she makes her own decisions. | 对 但她的所作所为我从不干涉 |
| [12:31] | Right. Well, let’s just get to it, shall we? | 好 咱们开始吧 好吧 |
| [12:33] | I’m a bleeder. | 我是新手哦 |
| [12:35] | It’s brilliant it all worked out | 请你们来做小蛋糕 |
| [12:37] | – with the cupcakes. – Excuse me? | -真是个好主意 -什么意思 |
| [12:39] | Well, I told Traive to hire you for the show. | 是我让小崔请你们来的 |
| [12:41] | Johnny cannot stop talking about your cupcakes, Max. | 麦克斯 强尼一直对你的小蛋糕赞不绝口 |
| [12:44] | “Max’s cupcakes are so moist.” | “麦克斯的小蛋糕水水的” |
| [12:46] | “Max’s cupcakes are delicious.” | “麦克斯的小蛋糕超好吃” |
| [12:47] | He loves your cupcakes. | 他爱死你的小蛋糕[胸部]了 |
| [12:49] | Yeah, yeah. | 是啊 是啊 |
| [12:51] | But just like in a casual way. | 他只是随口说说 |
| [12:52] | I mean, he barely even touched them. | 我是说 他都没验过货呢 |
| [12:55] | So, um, I’m a bit busy getting ready for the show. | 我要准备艺术展 先失陪了 |
| [12:57] | Why don’t you put your little cupcakes on these trays, | 你们可以先把小蛋糕放在盘子上 |
| [12:59] | and when people start coming in, circulate, right? | 当客人来时你们就走起 知道吗 |
| [13:02] | Circulate, girls, circulate. | 走起 姑娘们 走起 |
| [13:06] | Well, that wasn’t uncomfortable. | 这太让人不爽了 |
| [13:09] | Come on, let’s bolt before Johnny gets here, | 快点 趁强尼还没来 咱们赶紧撤 |
| [13:10] | while I at least have a shred of my dignity. | 在我尊严还没分崩离析前就走 |
| [13:12] | We can’t just bail out of our first big job. | 我们不能失信于我们第一笔大生意 |
| [13:14] | If we do, people will think we’re flakes. | 如果我们走了 人们会觉得我们不可靠 |
| [13:16] | And that’ll spread faster through Williamsburg | 这消息会立马传遍威廉斯堡 |
| [13:18] | than knit hats and herpes. | 比针织帽和疱疹流行的还快 |
| [13:20] | Hey, you ladies know where the wine goes? | 你们知道酒放哪儿吗 |
| [13:22] | – Right here. – Yeah. | -直接放这儿吧 -对 |
| [13:33] | No! Just, uh, not the wine. The wine’s mine. | 住手 不许拿酒 酒是我的 |
| [13:35] | Just serving cupcakes. | 我只供应蛋糕 |
| [13:38] | I’ve been listening in on Cashandra and her girlfriends’ conversations, | 我一直在偷听卡珊德拉和她的朋友说话 |
| [13:41] | and I don’t think she knows anything happened between you two. | 我觉得她对你俩的事情完全不知情 |
| [13:43] | I also learned she’s a dancer, | 我还知道她是个舞者 |
| [13:45] | her lip gloss is from Kiehl’s, | 她的唇膏用的契尔氏 |
| [13:46] | and she’s school chums with Adele. | 她和爱黛儿还是舍友 |
| [13:49] | Not the Adele. | 不会是那个”爱黛儿”吧 |
| [13:50] | Damn it! Could she be any cooler? | 靠 她还能再牛点吗 |
| [13:53] | I want her to be my girlfriend. | 我想让她当我的女朋友 |
| [13:55] | I wouldn’t break up with her for me. | 我一定不会为了我这种人而跟她分手 |
| [13:57] | Hi. I’m here. | 我来了 |
| [13:59] | Great. I was hoping tonight would get weirder. | 很好 我还盼着今晚能更糟点呢 |
| [14:02] | I had no idea. | 我完全不知情 |
| [14:04] | She did it to surprise me. | 她这么做是为了给我个惊喜 |
| [14:06] | And she did– I’m surprised. | 她做了 我惊了 |
| [14:07] | I am so sorry. | 真的很抱歉 |
| [14:09] | You have a girlfriend. Why are you kissing Max? | 你都有女朋友了 干嘛还亲麦克斯 |
| [14:11] | You told her? | 你告诉她了 |
| [14:13] | Oh, oh, I’m sorry. | 是啊 抱歉 |
| [14:14] | Would the more subtle way be to paint a picture | 难道挂一张咱俩接吻的画像示众 |
| [14:15] | and hang it on the wall for all to see? | 会更低调点吗 |
| [14:19] | Are you insane? | 你疯了吗 |
| [14:20] | Could we have a moment, please? | 我们俩能单独聊聊吗 |
| [14:22] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [14:23] | I’ll be over there near the ice penis. | 我会在冰雕阳具附近等 |
| [14:28] | Look, I am so sorry. | 听着 我很抱歉 |
| [14:30] | If I had known Cash was going to ask you to do all of this, | 如果我知道卡珊要请你们来干活 |
| [14:33] | I would have told you. | 我肯定会事先告诉你 |
| [14:34] | And why would you choose to hang that? | 你为什么选择把这幅画挂出来 |
| [14:35] | ‘Cause it’s my favorite piece. | 因为这是我最喜欢的一幅 |
| [14:37] | Is there any way she could know what happened? | 她有可能知道发生了什么吗 |
| [14:40] | No. | 不可能 |
| [14:42] | – Oh, my God. Your lips. – Split up. | -天啊 你的丰唇 -分开分开 |
| [14:44] | I can smell the sex from across the room. | 我在另一头都能闻到你们的情欲味 |
| [14:48] | No-whoa-whoa! I need all those. | 不行 我得留着喝 |
| [14:52] | So what? Is she still your girlfriend? | 所以呢 她还是你的女朋友吗 |
| [14:53] | Max, it’s complicated. | 麦克斯 这很复杂 |
| [14:55] | What, are we on Facebook? | 怎么了 我们现在是玩脸书吗 |
| [14:55] | 脸书的情感状态有六个选项 其中一项为”很复杂” | |
| [14:59] | It is complicated. | 这事就是很复杂 |
| [15:00] | Cash and I have been together two years, and when– | 我和卡珊已经在一起两年了 |
| [15:02] | Two years? | 两年了 |
| [15:03] | Jeez, I’m a home wrecker. | 天啊 我就个小三 |
| [15:04] | Adele will probably write a song about me. | 爱黛尔没准还会写首歌说我呢 |
| [15:09] | You’re not a homewrecker. | 你不是小三 |
| [15:10] | – I am. – Johnny! | -我是 -强尼 |
| [15:12] | You’ve got some folks. | 你的朋友来了 |
| [15:14] | Circulate, Max, circulate. | 走起 麦克斯 走起 |
| [15:18] | That’s it. This is over. | 够了 咱俩结束了 |
| [15:20] | That–us on the wall– never happens again. | 画上那种事 再也不会发生 |
| [15:23] | I lied. I can’t be your friend. | 我撒谎了 我无法和你做朋友 |
| [15:25] | I was trying to be cool, but I’m not cool. | 我也想跟她一样酷 但我真不酷 |
| [15:27] | I don’t know Adele. | 我可不认识爱黛儿 |
| [15:31] | What just happened over there? | 刚才你俩说什么了 |
| [15:32] | Did he tell you he’s breaking up with his girlfriend? | 他是不是说要和女朋友分手了 |
| [15:34] | No. What’s wrong with you? | 不 你是怎么回事 |
| [15:35] | You haven’t been right about anything? | 每件事都判断失误 |
| [15:38] | I told him we are done, and that’s over, okay? | 我告诉他我们玩完了 结束了 知道吗 |
| [15:42] | They’ve been together two years. | 人家都在一起都两年了 |
| [15:43] | And I know one thing about me– | 我这个人有个特点 |
| [15:45] | I may pick the wrong guys, | 或许我会选错人 |
| [15:46] | but when I hear another woman is involved, | 可只要事情演变成多角关系 |
| [15:48] | I am done. | 我立马走人 |
| [15:49] | This is truly the end of my pattern. | 我的套路真的到此为止 |
| [15:52] | We have to go– I kissed Johnny again. | 咱们真的得走了 我们又接吻了 |
| [15:54] | What? Max, you said you were going to the bathroom. | 什么 麦克斯 你说你要上厕所 |
| [15:57] | I did. And so did he. | 是啊 他也去了 |
| [15:58] | It’s a unisex bathroom– | 那是无”性”别厕所 |
| [16:00] | emphasis on the sex. | “性”呢 |
| [16:03] | We have to go. | 我们得马上走 |
| [16:04] | I’m a little drunk and out of control. | 我有点儿醉了 没有自制力 |
| [16:06] | Traive said we won’t get paid | 小崔说除非小蛋糕都没了 |
| [16:07] | until every single one of the cupcakes is gone. | 否则坚决不结账 |
| [16:09] | – So we’re stuck here. – Fine. | -所以我们被困在这儿了 -好吧 |
| [16:11] | I shall go circulate. | 那我走起 |
| [16:12] | No. You cannot be trusted. | 不 你信不过 |
| [16:14] | Next thing I know, you’ll be doing him behind the ice penis. | 没准下次你们就在冰雕阳具那搞起来了 |
| [16:19] | I’m telling you, I am done. | 相信我 一切就此结束了 |
| [16:21] | You told me that five minutes ago. | 你五分钟前就这么说了 |
| [16:23] | Well, you told me he was breaking up | 你还跟我说了三遍 |
| [16:25] | with his girlfriend three times. | 他会跟他女朋友分手呢 |
| [16:26] | So I guess we learned tonight that you know nothing about him, | 所以今晚我们学到了 你不了解强尼 |
| [16:29] | and I know nothing about me. | 而我也不了解自己 |
| [16:30] | Cheers! | 干杯 |
| [16:32] | Wait for me. | 等等 |
| [16:34] | Hello, girls. | 姑娘们 |
| [16:35] | Traivor told me you were looking to get paid. | 崔毁告诉我 你们想快点结账走人 |
| [16:37] | But just to be clear, you can’t actually be paid | 但先声明 除非所以小蛋糕都没了 |
| [16:39] | until all the cupcakes are gone. | 否则你们是拿不到钱的 |
| [16:41] | And do me a favor, love, | 帮我个忙 亲爱的 |
| [16:42] | put a chocolate aside for Johnny. | 留个巧克力味的给强尼 |
| [16:43] | He loves chocolate. | 他喜欢巧克力[肤色] |
| [16:45] | He’ll eat a vanilla if it’s available, | 虽然有机会时会吃吃香草味[白皮肤] |
| [16:46] | but he always goes back to chocolate. | 但他的最爱始终是巧克力 |
| [16:54] | I don’t think he’s going to break up with her. | 我认为他不会跟她分手 |
| [16:56] | Really? | 真的吗 |
| [16:57] | You have the accuracy rate of a magic 8 ball. | 你的准确度就跟魔法八号球一样 |
| [16:57] | 魔法八号球: 造型是撞球的八号球 作用类似签筒 暗想问题 晃一晃便会出现随机的预设答案 | |
| [17:05] | Look at her. She’s so pretty. | 瞧她 多美丽动人 |
| [17:08] | And bitchy. And… | 贱格无耻 |
| [17:11] | More pretty than bitchy. | 还是美丽多多 贱格少少 |
| [17:14] | Oh, God. She just zipped his hoodie | 天啊 她为他连帽衫拉拉链 |
| [17:16] | and fixed his hair– that’s a couple. | 还整理头发 那才是情侣 |
| [17:19] | What they have is real. | 他们才是真情 |
| [17:21] | They are a couple– Johnny and Cash. | 他们才是一对 强尼和卡珊 |
| [17:23] | Oh-ho, crap! Johnny Cash! | 太牛了 强尼·卡什 |
| [17:29] | They’re an institution. | 他们天生就是一起的 |
| [17:31] | I never had a chance. | 我从来没有机会 |
| [17:33] | Forget the money– let’s just go. | 别管钱了 咱们走吧 |
| [17:34] | Mm-mmm. | 不要 |
| [17:36] | We are staying till these cupcakes are gone. | 我们要坚持到蛋糕都没了 |
| [17:38] | I am not leaving with no dignity and no money. | 我不能没钱没尊严地走掉 |
| [17:40] | Fine, I’ll circulate a couple more times. | 好吧 我去多转几圈 |
| [17:44] | Wait a minute. | 等等 |
| [17:45] | They said they had to be gone, | 他们说小蛋糕要全没了 |
| [17:47] | but they didn’t say who had to make them gone. | 但他们没说要怎么把它们弄没了 |
| [17:52] | We eat them and go! | 我们吃完 然后走人 |
| [17:54] | You’re doing it! I rescued you from the gutter. | 你非做不可 我可是把你从贫民窟中救回来 |
| [17:57] | Uh, well, that’s not entirely accura– | 这种说法不准… |
| [18:28] | Max, wake up. | 麦克斯 醒醒 |
| [18:29] | It’s 3:00. | 都下午三点了 |
| [18:30] | We forgot to set the alarm. | 我们忘记定闹钟了 |
| [18:34] | Oh, I never thought waking up in bed with another woman with… | 我真没想到跟另一个女人在床上醒来 |
| [18:38] | frosting on my boobs, would be this depressing. | 胸部还粘满奶油 感觉会这么不爽 |
| [18:42] | How are you feeling about it all today? | 你今天感觉怎么样 |
| [18:43] | Do you want to talk? | 想谈谈吗 |
| [18:45] | – No. – Good. | -不 -好吧 |
| [19:00] | Where’s your purse? | 你的钱包呢 |
| [19:02] | I’m going to take some of the money we made last night | 我要拿点昨晚赚的钱 |
| [19:03] | and get coffee. And yes– | 去买咖啡 没错 |
| [19:04] | I am walking down the street like this, | 我就是要这副样子走出去 |
| [19:06] | because after last night, I am impenetrable to shame. | 因为昨晚过后 羞耻心对我来说就是浮云 |
| [19:11] | Wait, we don’t have any money. | 慢着 咱们没有钱 |
| [19:12] | – Yes, we do. – No, we don’t. | -不 我们有 -是的 我们没有 |
| [19:15] | We did, but we don’t. | 我们有过 但花掉了 |
| [19:15] | I bought something with it. | 我拿它卖了点东西 |
| [19:18] | I bought this. | 我买了这个 |
| [19:21] | You carried that home? Where was I? | 你自己把这幅画搬回家的 那我干嘛去了 |
| [19:23] | Three blocks ahead of me, | 走在我三个街区前 |
| [19:24] | telling strangers about your pattern. | 到处跟陌生人说你的套路 |
| [19:28] | I saw you and Johnny just hanging there, | 我看到你和强尼就这么晾着 |
| [19:30] | and I knew what I had to do. | 我就知道我该做点什么 |
| [19:32] | So what, am I supposed to hang that up? | 然后呢 把它继续挂墙上吗 |
| [19:34] | No. You’re supposed to destroy it. | 不 你应该亲手毁掉它 |
| [19:36] | You need to get over him, so you’re going to kick this, | 你得忘掉他 所以你得一脚踹飞这个 |
| [19:39] | and then you’re going to kick him once and for all. | 然后你就会一脚把他踹出你的世界 |
| [19:41] | You want to break your pattern? | 你想打破你的套路吗 |
| [19:42] | Start by breaking the painting. | 先从打破这副画开始吧 |
| [19:44] | That is a complete waste of money. | 真是他妈的浪费钱 |
| [19:46] | I may have been wrong about everything else about Johnny, | 或许之前我对强尼的判断都错了 |
| [19:48] | but I’m right about this. Come on. | 但在这件事上我是对的 快点 |
| [19:51] | Kick it. | 踹啊 |
| [19:55] | I can’t. | 我做不到 |
| [19:57] | – Give me your foot. – What? | -把脚给我 -什么 |
| [19:58] | Lift up your leg. | 抬起你的脚 |
| [20:03] | Yay! You did it. | 耶 你做到了 |
| [20:06] | Good for you! | 干得好 |
| [20:07] | You broke a painting and maybe your pattern. | 你打破了这幅画 或许你的套路也就此结束 |
| [20:11] | I really liked him. | 我真的很喜欢他 |
| [20:13] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [20:18] | I slept through my day job, so what the heck? | 反正白天的工作都睡过了 无所谓了 |
| [20:20] | I think I will take to the bed or whatever. | 我要上床赖着或干点别的了 |
| [20:23] | Just for like 20 minutes. | 二十分钟就好 |
| [20:26] | I’ll set my alarm and then I’ll get up | 我把闹钟定好 然后起床 |
| [20:27] | and get ready for work. | 出门工作 |
| [20:30] | Max, please, I feel like we need a hug. | 麦克斯 拜托 我觉得我们应该抱抱 |
| [20:32] | We just slept together! You women are so needy. | “睡”完还要抱抱 你们女人也要求太多了吧 |