时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:01] | War is hell. | 战场就是地狱 |
[00:03] | The object is to destroy and demoralize. | 目的就是摧毁与毁灭 |
[00:05] | We will gouge out their eyes, piss in their skulls, | 我们会剜出他们的眼珠 在他们头颅上撒尿 |
[00:08] | and anything left breathing, we rape! | 只要还有喘气的 我们就灭了他 |
[00:11] | Damn, white people take this softball shit serious. | 我去 白人可真拿这软球球当回事 |
[00:14] | This is Brickleberry versus Yellowstone. | 这可是脆莓对战黄石 |
[00:17] | I got 2 G’s on this game! | 我在这场比赛上押了2000块 |
[00:19] | Now, in the spirit of baseball, let’s pray… | 现在 以棒球精神我们开始祈祷 |
[00:21] | That they all get Lou Gehrig’s disease. | 他们都得卢伽雷氏病 |
[00:23] | – Amen. – Shouldn’t we wait for Ethel? | – 阿门 – 我们不等等Ethel吗? |
[00:25] | I think she went to look for her boyfriend. | 我想她去找她男朋友了 |
[00:27] | Who’s the lucky fella this week? | 这周是谁这么幸运啊 |
[00:29] | Slut. | 贱人 |
[00:30] | Sorry, I had something in my throat before I said, “slut”. | 不好意思 不说”贱人”这词 我就咳不出痰 |
[00:33] | Honey? The game’s about to start. What are you doing in there? | 亲爱的 比赛马上就开始了 你在里面干什么呢 |
[00:36] | Be out in a minute! I’m taping up. | 马上出去 我在缠绷带 |
[00:38] | Oh, don’t be so shy. | 别这么害羞嘛 |
[00:41] | Oh, my God! | 我的天啊 |
[00:42] | You are cheating on me with two women? | 你在我背后又搞了两个女人? |
[00:44] | It’s not what it looks like. | 并不是看上去的那样 |
[00:46] | See? Only one woman. | 看见了吧 只有一个 |
[00:47] | They’re conjoined twins. | 她们是连体双胞胎 |
[00:51] | Aw, come on! | 别这样嘛 |
[00:52] | I don’t even like the one that controls the legs! | 我都不喜欢控制腿的那个 |
[00:55] | So, uh, where were we? | 那么 我们继续? |
[00:58] | I was the one who uncrossed our legs for you. | 我可是把腿缠在你身上的那个 |
[01:01] | Call me. | 给我打电话 |
[01:12] | 黄石: 18 脆莓: 0 坏球: 0 本垒打: 0 出局: 2 | |
[01:15] | Damn it, you bastards! This is the bottom of the ninth! | 去死吧 一群混蛋 这已经是第九节最后的时刻了 |
[01:18] | It’s our last chance. | 我们最后的机会 |
[01:19] | Come on, rally bear. Show some spirit. | 来嘛 吉祥物熊熊 给打打气 |
[01:22] | Why can’t you dance like those black bears? | 你为什么不能像那帮黑熊似的跳跳舞 |
[01:24] | ♪ Go yellow, go Yellowstone! ♪ | ♪ 加油黄石 加油黄石公园 ♪ |
[01:26] | ♪ Go yellow, go Yellowstone! ♪ | ♪ 加油黄石 加油黄石公园 ♪ |
[01:28] | I am fighting the urge to say something horribly racist. | 我正忍住不提一些很种族主义的话 |
[01:32] | Oh, that reminds me. | 这倒提醒了我 |
[01:33] | Denzel! Steal third base! | Denzel 盗三垒 |
[01:36] | Pretend it’s a car stereo. | 把那当做汽车音响 |
[01:38] | I’ma kill that cracker one day. | 等哪天我不整死你 |
[01:40] | So, what are you doing after the game? | 那么你比完赛要干啥去? |
[01:42] | I think you have the wrong impression of me. | 我想你看错人了 |
[01:44] | I’m a lesbian, Sir. | 我是蕾丝边 先生 |
[01:46] | Ouch. | 我去 |
[01:51] | All right, next up? | 好了 下一个 |
[01:52] | Aw, Christ, it’s Steve. | 妈呀 是Steve |
[01:55] | Come on, easy out! | 加油 放轻松 |
[01:59] | Come on, Steve, don’t choke! | 加油 Steve 别掉链子 |
[02:01] | Let’s hear it for Steve! | 我们一起为Steve加油 |
[02:03] | Don’t choke, Steve! | 别掉链子 Steve |
[02:04] | Don’t choke, Steve! Don’t choke, Steve! | 别掉链子 Steve 别掉链子 Steve |
[02:07] | Listen to that crowd, Steve. | 听到大家怎么喊了吧 Steve |
[02:09] | You’re their hero. And you’re 0 for 9. | 你是他们的英雄 打九个球都没中 |
[02:12] | Statistically, you’re almost guaranteed to get a hit. | 据统计来说 你这球一定没问题了 |
[02:30] | – You’re out. – Out? | – 你出局了 – 出局了 |
[02:32] | How am I out? | 我怎么出局了? |
[02:33] | Because you slid into the pitcher’s mound, moron. | 你滑到投手丘的泥里了 白痴 |
[02:36] | Yellowstone wins. | 黄石赢 |
[02:37] | Steve sucks! | Steve真垃圾 |
[02:42] | – Steve sucks! – Loser! | – Steve真垃圾 – 衰货 |
[02:44] | Burning! | 着了 |
[02:47] | Burn! Burning! | 着了 着了 |
[02:50] | Thank God! | 谢天谢地 |
[02:53] | So we lost the bet. This isn’t so bad. | 我们打赌输了 这也没啥啊 |
[02:56] | One lap around the field naked isn’t the end of the world. | 裸体绕场一周又没有那么可怕啦 |
[03:00] | Oh, what is that? | 这是啥? |
[03:02] | Damn, I see your balls, but where is… | 天 我看到你的蛋蛋了 但你那… |
[03:04] | It looks like you have a vagina with balls. | 你这就好像是花蕊边挂着俩蛋蛋 |
[03:06] | – You have a ball gina. – Okay, okay. | – 你长了个蛋蛋蕊 – 好吧 好吧 |
[03:09] | I don’t know whether to be grossed out or horny. | 我不知道是该恶心还是性奋了 |
[03:11] | I’m really confused right now. | 我此刻很费解啊 |
[03:13] | The point is we’re still a team, right? | 重点在于我们还是一个团队 是吧 |
[03:17] | Aw, okay. There it is. | 好吧 这就是了 |
[03:19] | Damn, man. Looks like your dick is stuck in quicksand. | 我去 老兄 好像是你的小鸟陷在流沙里了 |
[03:22] | Come on. You guys can’t be mad at me. | 得了吧 你们不会生我的气吧 |
[03:25] | Here you go, little fella. Grab on to this and I’ll pull you out. | 来来 小家伙 抓住这个 我把你拉出来 |
[03:28] | I’ll get you to safety. | 我送你到安全的地方 |
[03:29] | [Nervous chuckle] I’m not mad at you, Steve. | 我可没生你的气 Steve |
[03:32] | [Camera shutter clicking] I just can’t believe Carl cheated on me. | 我真不敢相信Carl背叛了我 |
[03:34] | I am so done with him. I do have self-respect, you know. | 我和他玩完了 我可是有自尊的 你要知道 |
[03:38] | Oh, I know you do, sugar snatch. | 当然知道你有啦 偷糖小贼贼 |
[03:41] | Carl Oh, Carl. | |
[03:42] | Now, you losers ready to do your lap? | 你们这些衰货准备好绕圈了吗 |
[03:52] | All right, good warm-up lap. Now take ’em out on the pavement. | 好了 很好的热身圈 现在带他们到人行道上去 |
[03:58] | Who agreed to that bet? | 谁同意打的这个赌 |
[04:00] | Ah, Steve did. | Steve同意的 |
[04:01] | I didn’t think we could lose. | 我可没想到我们能输啊 |
[04:03] | – We’ll get ’em next week! – Next week? | – 下周我们再赢回来 – 下周 |
[04:06] | I lost 2 grand on that game, Steve! | 我在这场比赛上输了两千块了 Steve |
[04:08] | I don’t know how I’m gonna pay up, Steve! | 我都不知道怎么还了 Steve |
[04:10] | Oh, you’ll find a way to pay me. | 你会找到还我钱的路子的 |
[04:12] | They always do. | 总是有办法的 |
[04:16] | Guys, it’s not my fault I can’t play baseball. | 大伙 这不是我的错啊 我不会打棒球的 |
[04:18] | No one ever taught me. | 没人教我 |
[04:20] | You gotta remember, I grew up without a father. | 你们都记得 我从小就没爹 |
[04:24] | Aw, Christ. | 老天啊 |
[04:25] | – Oh, brother! – Gay. | – 老兄啊 – 基佬 |
[04:26] | It’s true. My father, Jonah Williams, | 真的 我父亲Jonah Williams |
[04:29] | was the greatest Park Ranger Brickleberry had ever seen. | 是脆莓有史以来最杰出的林警 |
[04:34] | He was a hero to both man and beast alike. | 他是人类和畜生们的英雄 |
[04:39] | There was nothing he couldn’t do… | 没有什么他做不到的 |
[04:42] | And he never failed to amaze us. | 他总是能够给我们带来惊喜 |
[04:47] | But tragedy struck when he took me on my first camping trip. | 但就在他第一次带我出去露营时 悲剧降临了 |
[04:50] | It all started very innocently. | 开始时总是令人毫无防备 |
[04:52] | “The doctor says Steve needs anti-psychotic medication”. | 医生说要给Steve吃安定药 |
[04:55] | “We are Christian scientists! | 我们可是信仰基督教的科学家 |
[04:57] | I’ll snap your neck, woman!” | 看我不扭断你的脖子 臭娘们 |
[04:59] | “Aah! You’re hurting me!” | 你弄疼我啦 |
[05:01] | “Aw, take that in the back! | 来啊 给你背后再来一下 |
[05:02] | That [Bleep]ing goddamn mother[Bleep]ing”. | 你这刮千刀的狗杂种 |
[05:07] | But things took a dark turn, and someone needed his help. | 但是事态急转直下 有人正需要他的援手 |
[05:10] | My dolly! | 我的娃娃 |
[05:22] | I’m okay, son. | 我没事 儿子 |
[05:30] | I’m okay, son! | 我没事 儿子 |
[05:33] | I’m still okay, son! | 我还是好好的 儿子 |
[05:38] | That one hurt a little! | 这下有点儿疼 |
[05:44] | The only comfort I get is that he died peacefully. | 我唯一值得欣慰的是他死得不算痛苦 |
[05:47] | – Wow. – Aw, please. | – 天哪 – 拜托 |
[05:49] | Steve uses not having a dad as an excuse for everything. | 每次有麻烦Steve就拿他老爹当挡箭牌 |
[05:52] | Damn! | 靠 |
[05:56] | My father never taught me how to fight. | 我老爹可从没教过我怎么打架 |
[05:58] | Sorry, Denzel. | 抱歉 Denzel |
[05:59] | My father never taught me how to post bail. | 我老爹可从没教过我怎么申请保释 |
[06:01] | My father never taught me how to ride a bike! | 我老爹可从没教过我怎么骑车 |
[06:03] | Look out, look out, look out! | 小心 小心 小心 |
[06:04] | Aah! Double-paned! | 好疼 是双层玻璃 |
[06:06] | Tempered! Stained glass! | 钢化玻璃 染色玻璃 |
[06:08] | Storm window! | 防风窗 |
[06:09] | Glass ceiling! | 玻璃顶棚 |
[06:11] | That one stopped me. | 那玩意没撞破 |
[06:13] | Enough excuses, Steve. | 别扯油头了 Steve |
[06:14] | Denzel never had a dad, and he’s not a wuss. | Denzel一直也没爹 人家可不是牢骚鬼 |
[06:17] | Woody, my father raised me. | Woody 我可是我爹带大的 |
[06:19] | By “father” you mean “grandmother”, right? | 你口中的”老爹”应该是”祖母” 对吧 |
[06:21] | Look, guys, I know I let you down. | 听着 伙计们 我知道让你们失望了 |
[06:24] | But those days are over. | 但这都是过去了 |
[06:26] | The next chance I get, I’m gonna prove that I’m more of a man than anyone here. | 只要下次有机会 我绝对会证明我比这里任何人都爷们儿 |
[06:30] | Including her. | 包括她在内 |
[06:33] | Uh, hi. Um, I’ve got a real problem here. | 你好 我想反映一个严重问题 |
[06:35] | My campsite is littered with half-eaten goats. | 我的营地里到处都是被吃掉一半的山羊 |
[06:37] | Half-eaten goats? | 被吃掉一半的山羊 |
[06:41] | Crap. Looks like it’s that rabid cougar again. | 见鬼 看来又是那只美洲狮来捣乱了 |
[06:44] | Which one of you is gonna hunt him down? | 你们谁愿意去搞定它 |
[06:46] | You know what? | 你猜怎么着? |
[06:47] | I’ve been looking for an opportunity to prove my manhood since about 30 seconds ago. | 就在30秒之前 我还在想怎么证明我的爷们儿气概 |
[06:51] | I’ll do it. | 包在我身上 |
[06:53] | Sorry, I guess you didn’t know that I wasn’t finished speaking. | 抱歉 我想你还没听完我的话 |
[06:56] | I’d like my $10 camping fee back. | 我希望能退还我10美刀的野营费 |
[06:58] | No problem, I’ll just run your credit card. | 没问题 你把信用卡给我刷一下就行了 |
[07:02] | Done. Should show up on your statement at the end of the month. | 搞定 这个月底就应该能打到你的卡上了 |
[07:07] | You suck. You are a pile of shit. | 你个衰人 你就是一坨扶不上墙的烂泥 |
[07:10] | And I want you to know that your parents just called, | 而我想告诉你 你父母刚打电话来说 |
[07:12] | and they’re getting a divorce. | 他们要离婚 |
[07:14] | They said it’s your fault, because you have leukemia | 他们说这都是因为你得了白血病 |
[07:16] | and all your hair’s gonna fall out. | 你头发也会掉光光 |
[07:18] | Who are you talking to? | 你这是在和谁说话呢 |
[07:20] | Son, we have something to tell you. We’re getting divorced. | 儿子 我们要告诉你些事情 我们要离婚了 |
[07:23] | And you have leukemia. | 而且你有白血病 |
[07:26] | Malloy, I know it’s past the deadline, but I’ve almost got your $2,000 together. | Malloy 我知道这有些过分 但我快给你筹到2000美刀了 |
[07:30] | I just need $1,900 more. | 再筹个1900就够了 |
[07:32] | You worry too much, Woody. We’ll work something out. | 你别太操心了 Woody 我们会想到别的办法的 |
[07:35] | Okay, so what are you thinking? Some kind of installment plan? | 好吧 那么你有何打算 采取分期付款吗 |
[07:37] | Will you relax? | 拜托放松好吗 |
[07:39] | Here. | 拿去 |
[07:41] | Sniff this for me. | 帮我闻闻这个 |
[07:49] | Don’t look at me like that, it’s just business. | 别拿那种眼神看我 生意而已 |
[07:53] | How am I ever gonna find this cougar? | 我到底该怎么样找到那只豹子 |
[07:55] | Follow the dead goats. | 跟着山羊尸体走就行了 |
[07:57] | Good idea, voice in my head. | 真是个好主意 脑海里的声音 |
[07:58] | You sound so much cooler than when I talk out loud. | 你比我大吼大叫时的声音好听多了 |
[08:00] | It’s me, dumb ass. | 是我在说话 蠢材 |
[08:02] | You picked the wrong time to start acting like a man. | 你逞英雄的时机真是大错特错 |
[08:04] | That cougar’s gonna eat you alive, Steve. | 那豹子绝对要把你活吞了 Steve |
[08:06] | Thanks for the tough love. Namaste. | 谢谢你的苦口良言 合十礼 |
[08:08] | “Namaste”. | 合十礼 |
[08:10] | Nah, I’ma stay right here where there ain’t no cougars. | 我还是呆在没有豹子侵扰的地方算了 |
[08:17] | Your suffering is over. | 你的痛苦结束了 |
[08:22] | Mercy is upon you. | 愿主怜悯你 |
[08:26] | Uh, sorry about that. | 很抱歉没打中 |
[08:28] | Now, mercy will be upon you. | 现在 接受主的怜悯吧 |
[08:31] | Almost done. | 就快了 |
[08:33] | You’ll be with Jesus soon. | 很快你就能和耶稣同行了 |
[08:35] | Die! | 去死吧 |
[08:41] | Save a place for me in heaven, friend. | 帮我在天堂占个座 朋友 |
[08:53] | That must be where it lives. | 这肯定就是它的藏身之处 |
[08:57] | Be a man, Steve. | 爷们儿点 Steve |
[09:01] | Be a man, be a man, be a man, | 爷们儿点 爷们儿点 爷们儿点 |
[09:02] | be a man, be a man, be a man, be a man. | 爷们儿点 爷们儿点 爷们儿点 爷们儿点 |
[09:09] | I don’t want to be a man! | 我不想当爷们儿啊 |
[09:18] | Dad? | 老爹 |
[09:19] | Oh, my God. Dad! | 老天 老爹 |
[09:21] | It’s you! | 居然是你 |
[09:24] | I have one question for you, dad. | 我有问题要问你 老爹 |
[09:27] | Why do I have a ball gina? | 为啥我长了蛋蛋蕊 |
[09:36] | – That’s your dad? – Yeah. | – 那货是你爹? – 没错 |
[09:38] | Dad, meet Denzel. | 老爹 这是Denzel |
[09:41] | No! Eh, eh, eh! Eh, eh, eh, dad! | 不 别别别别别 老爹 |
[09:44] | Jonah, listen, sorry I never looked for you. | Jonah 听着 很抱歉我从没去找你 |
[09:47] | I meant to, but your wife was in dire need of comforting, | 我本来想去 但你老婆真心很需要抚慰 |
[09:50] | way down deep in her uterus. | 尤其是她的子宫深处 |
[09:53] | I’ve held my tongue long enough. | 我已经不想再憋着了 |
[09:54] | Your dad smells like shit. | 你老爹闻起来就像大便一样 |
[09:58] | Don’t tell me you’re still pissed about this kidney thing, | 别告诉我你还为削肾那事生气 |
[10:01] | because I’ve moved on. | 因为我已经不计较了 |
[10:02] | The important thing is my dad is back and he hasn’t changed a bit. | 重要的是我老爹还活着 而且他还一点都没变 |
[10:10] | – Well, that’s kind of new. – Yo, that’s messed up. | – 这招倒是没见过 – 嘿 真够变态的 |
[10:13] | I’ll tell you what’s messed up… | 我觉得变态的是… |
[10:15] | Your judgmental attitude. | 你狗眼看人低的态度 |
[10:17] | Father just needs a little help readjusting to society. | 我爸就是需要点帮助 重新适应社会而已 |
[10:22] | Dad’s new comedy bit. He’s almost done. | 老爸新学的搞笑段子 就快演完了 |
[10:25] | Okay, that’s enough. | 好啦 够啦 |
[10:28] | Okay, pops, we get it. | 行啦 老爸 我们都看懂啦 |
[10:30] | Please don’t finish. | 求别射啊 |
[10:37] | Why do I always fall for the wrong guy? | 为什么我总是爱上错的人? |
[10:39] | I just want a nice guy, someone who will treat me with respect. | 我想要的只是一个心眼好 尊重我的人 |
[10:43] | I bet that person’s closer than you think. | 我打赌那样的人就近在眼前 |
[10:45] | Oh, Connie, I’m so lucky to have a platonic friend like you. | Connie 有你这样的闺蜜我真是幸运 |
[10:50] | Stop being so chicken shit, Connie. | 不能再这么懦弱了 Connie |
[10:52] | Tell her how you feel. | 告诉她你的感受 |
[10:54] | Tell her you want to start a fire by rubbing your ‘ginas together. | 告诉她你想要你俩的胯间摩擦出激情的火花 |
[10:57] | Don’t talk about her like that. | 不许这样子说她 |
[10:59] | Talk about who like that? | 哪样子说谁? |
[11:01] | Ellen’s on. | 《艾伦秀》开始了 |
[11:04] | Now, father, since you’ve returned to the civilized world, | 现在 爸爸 既然你回归文明世界了 |
[11:07] | it’s crucial that you learn the difference between a salad fork and a dessert fork. | 区分沙拉叉和甜点叉可是至关重要的一大步 |
[11:13] | No, no, no. Salad fork. | 不行 停下 看好 这是沙拉叉 |
[11:21] | What is going on here? | 怎么回事啊? |
[11:23] | Armando, these are people trying to have a nice meal. | Armando 这些人就想安安静静吃顿好饭 |
[11:26] | Why you bother them? | 你打扰他们干嘛? |
[11:27] | Allow me to apologize on Armando’s behalf. | 请允许替Armando向两位致歉 |
[11:30] | He is new, but he is very good boy. | 他是新来的 可他是个好孩子 |
[11:33] | Armando, uh, why don’t you go and get these nice people some free bread sticks? | Armando 不如你去给这两位老板拿点免费的面包条? |
[11:38] | You come back anytime. | 招待不周啊 下次来 |
[11:39] | Anybody you wanna stab him in the neck, you go right ahead. | 您想插谁的脖子 随便插就是 |
[12:24] | All aboard the Williams and Son rail road! | 请大家快点登上”老威父子”列车 |
[12:27] | Now departing for happily ever after! | 通往永远幸福的列车马上就要出发了 |
[12:31] | You know what would make this even better? Snow cones. | 要让此情此景更棒 猜我们还缺点啥? 刨冰 |
[12:35] | Hey, Steve, I’m doing my match dot com profile, | Steve 我在编辑”相亲.com”个人资料 |
[12:38] | and I need a polite way to say “no Armenians”. | “亚美尼亚人死远点”怎么才能说得礼貌些? |
[12:41] | Now, do you think they’ll take a hint if I say I don’t like uni-brows, | 如果说”我不喜欢一字眉” 别人能心领神会吗? |
[12:44] | or should I also throw in “no white BMW’s”? | 还是我应该添上”白色宝马车免谈”? |
[12:49] | Oh, hello. You must be Steve’s father. | 你好 你一定就是Steve的父亲了 |
[12:51] | Excuse me. I just said hello. | 真无礼 我就跟你打个招呼 |
[12:54] | Is that any way to treat a woman? | 用得着这样对待女人吗? |
[12:55] | You’re rude, you’re disrespectful, you’re… | 你既粗鲁 又无礼 你… |
[12:58] | Just my type. | 就是我的菜 |
[13:01] | Do you want tutti-frutti or goo-goo gra… | 你想吃什锦水果味的还是… |
[13:13] | Are you just gonna sit there and do nothing | 那个野人搞你的真爱 |
[13:15] | while that creep bangs your true love? | 你还要坐在这里无动于衷吗? |
[13:17] | Ethel’s a grown woman. She can date whoever she wants. | Ethel是个成熟女人 她想跟谁好就跟谁 |
[13:20] | You’re pathetic. | 你真可悲 |
[13:21] | You don’t even deserve an evil alter ego. | 你甚至不配有我这样的邪恶人格 |
[13:24] | I’m not listening to you. | 我不要再听了 |
[13:26] | Why are we yelling at deer piss? | 我们对着一泡鹿尿嚷个啥? |
[13:31] | It’s not fair. | 这事不公平 |
[13:33] | My father and I were just starting to rebuild our relationship. | 我爸爸和我就在重建父子关系的节骨眼上 |
[13:36] | I shouldn’t have to share him with her. | 我才不要她搅和进来 |
[13:40] | Darling, I’ll handle this. | 亲爱的 交给我来 |
[13:42] | Steve, you’re going to have to accept that what your father and I have is real. | Steve 你要学会接受 你爸爸和我这事是真的 |
[13:45] | Real kinky. | 真的很放得开 |
[13:46] | Anything you can imagine, we’ve tried it. | 你能想到的任何招式 我们都玩过了 |
[13:48] | Think about that for a minute. | 你仔细琢磨一下吧 |
[13:50] | See? She’s driving me crazy. | 看见没? 她都快逼疯我了 |
[13:52] | And how does that make you feel? | 那对此你作何感受? |
[13:54] | Crazy. Wow, you’re good. | 发疯啊 哇 你真行 |
[13:56] | Doctor, I understand Steve’s pain, | 医生 我理解Steve的痛苦 |
[13:58] | but Jonah’s unlike any man I’ve dated before. | 可是Jonah不像我以前好过的任何男人 |
[14:00] | Sure, he doesn’t say much, but so what? | 诚然 他话不多 但那又怎样? |
[14:02] | My banter is charming enough for two people. | 姐这张刀子嘴够两个人使的 |
[14:05] | That’s a good one, Ethel. Oh, it certainly is. | “这句说得真不错 Ethel” 哎 当然啦 |
[14:10] | No, now is not the right time, sweetheart. | 不行 现在时机不成熟 宝贝 |
[14:12] | Fine, I’ll tell him. | 行吧 我跟他说 |
[14:14] | Steve, your father and I, we’re getting married. | Steve 你爸爸和我 我们要结婚了 |
[14:17] | What? | 什么? |
[14:18] | I’m sorry you had to learn this way. | 我很抱歉这样冒失地告诉你 |
[14:19] | I was hoping you’d find out on Facebook. | 我本来希望你是从脸书上看到的 |
[14:21] | I can’t handle this. | 我可受不了啦 |
[14:23] | You need to choose, dad. | 你得做出抉择 老爸 |
[14:24] | It’s her or me. | 要她还是要我 |
[14:28] | I see you’ve made your choice. | 我看见你做出的”选择”了 |
[14:33] | Good news, I’m getting 2 grand for your kidney on the Jamaican black market. | 好消息 你的肾在牙买加黑市上可以卖两千刀 |
[14:36] | As far as I’m concerned, we’re square. | 就我而言 我们扯平了 |
[14:38] | Come on, snuggly-wubs, don’t sell my kidney. | 算了吧 亲爱的小熊仔 别卖掉我的肾啊 |
[14:42] | Just give me a chance to win it back, double or nothing. | 给我个机会把它赢回来 要么翻倍 要么全赔 |
[14:44] | – I don’t know. – Please, give me a chance! | – 我不确定哎 – 求你啦 给个机会 |
[14:46] | – I’ll bet on anything you want! – I bet you will. | – 你想要啥我都敢赌 – 我打赌你敢的 |
[14:49] | – Okay, let’s bet. – We just did. | – 行 那赌吧 – 这不刚赌了吗 |
[14:51] | – Did I win? – Ooh, you lost. | – 我赢了没? – 你输了 |
[14:54] | Goddamn it! | 我擦 |
[14:55] | Oh, man, he’s on a roll. | 靠啊 他赌运还真好 |
[14:59] | That was such a fun night. | 那一夜是多么美好啊 |
[15:01] | Sounds like we both have a problem. | 听起来我们俩都有点小麻烦 |
[15:04] | Who are you? | 你是谁? |
[15:06] | Oh, Connie. | Connie啊 |
[15:07] | Here’s the thing, Steve. | 事情明摆着了 Steve |
[15:09] | Neither of us want this wedding to happen. | 咱俩谁也不希望这场婚礼举行 |
[15:11] | Perhaps we should join forces. | 或许我们可以联合起来 |
[15:13] | Yeah, join forces. | 是哦 联合起来 |
[15:15] | Do as I say… | 照我说的做 |
[15:17] | And we’ll both be very happy. | 保证我们俩谁都不会吃亏 |
[15:22] | Yeah, yeah. You’re… you’re… you’re not gonna hurt my dad, are you? | 成 成 你… 你不会想伤害我爸吧 是不? |
[15:25] | Of course not. He’ll be fine… | 当然不会了 他会好好的… |
[15:28] | In hell. | 下地狱 |
[15:29] | How did you do that? | 这效果咋做的? |
[15:30] | Sorry. I farted on your candle. | 抱歉 我冲蜡烛放了个屁 |
[15:34] | Are you with the bride or the groom? | 你们是女方家属还是男方家属? |
[15:36] | She’s with the bride, she’s with the groom. | 她是女方家属 她是男方家属 |
[15:39] | Anybody got a chain saw? | 谁有链锯吗? |
[15:41] | Sorry I dragged you to this. | 抱歉把你硬拖过来 |
[15:42] | Actually, I dragged you to this. | 其实是我硬拖着你来啦 |
[15:49] | Well, I’m happy for you, dad. | 好吧 我替你高兴 老爸 |
[15:51] | No ulterior motives here. | 绝无不可告人动机 |
[15:53] | Ha! Good one. | 藏得好 |
[15:55] | Would you excuse me, father? I need to sabotage the wedding. | 失陪一下 亲爹 我要去妨碍一下婚礼 |
[15:57] | Not this wedding, a different one. | 不是你的婚礼啦 是另外一家 |
[15:58] | The Finklesteins, Bob and Jill. You don’t know them. | 芬克尔斯坦一家啦 Bob和Jill 你不认识他们 |
[16:00] | Nobody knows them. They’re made up. | 没人认识 我胡编的 |
[16:02] | Damn it! | 见鬼 |
[16:04] | So, here it is, my life savings, just like you wanted. | 全拿来了 我一辈子的积蓄 照你的指示 |
[16:07] | $400. | 整整四百块 |
[16:08] | So, what are we spending it on? | 说吧 打算怎么花? |
[16:10] | No, don’t tell me. I want to be surprised. | 不行 别告诉我 我要留点小惊喜 |
[16:17] | Uh, I got it. | 懂了懂了 |
[16:18] | We’re gonna hit Ethel with this crate. | 我们要拿这个板条箱砸Ethel |
[16:25] | Oh, Malloy, you make the cutest ring-“bear”- er. | Malloy 你真是最萌人的婚礼戒熊啦 |
[16:30] | Oh, you are funny. | 爱搞笑是吧? |
[16:31] | Is that why you’re wearing white on your wedding day, you whore? | 所以你要在婚礼上穿一身白咯 你个浪货 |
[16:34] | I cannot believe you brought that thing here. | 真不敢相信你居然带着那玩意儿过来 |
[16:36] | Talk about passive-aggressive. | 什么叫消极攻击啊 |
[16:38] | Come on, let me get even. | 拜托 我要反击 |
[16:40] | One more shot, double or nothing. | 最后一赌 要么翻倍要么全赔 |
[16:42] | You need help, Woody. You’ve got a disease. | 你需要帮助 Woody 你得病了 |
[16:45] | I know that because when I tried to sell your kidney, | 我知道这事 因为卖你肾的时候 |
[16:47] | they said, “that man has a disease”. | 他们说 这家伙有病 |
[16:49] | Well, I need to get this wedding started. | 行了 我要主持婚礼开幕 |
[16:51] | I’ve only got five minutes of clean blood left. | 只剩五分钟的干净血源了 |
[16:53] | Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to legitimize the fornication | 亲爱的朋友们 今天我们齐聚在此 见证这场乱伦之恋 |
[16:57] | between this beautiful woman and this man, who… | 这位漂亮的女士和这位先生… |
[16:59] | Oh, God, he’s eating a rat. | 靠 苍天啊 他在吃耗子 |
[17:03] | Huh? My God. | 天啊 |
[17:05] | Connie’s totally lost it. | Connie玩邪的 |
[17:06] | She’s planning on murder. | 她在策划谋杀 |
[17:08] | I need to do something. | 我得采取行动 |
[17:09] | Dad, why don’t you and Ethel switch places? | 老爸 要不你和Ethel换个位置吧 |
[17:14] | Crisis averted. | 危机转移 |
[17:16] | Damn, she’s good. | 擦 真有她的 |
[17:18] | Would you, uh, excuse me, everyone? | 那个… 别介意 大伙 |
[17:20] | I, uh, have to make a number two. | 我… 憋不住要去拉个大号 |
[17:26] | Come on. | 加油 |
[17:29] | And now, to save my dad! | 走起救老爹 |
[17:36] | Marriage is the sacred union of man and woman, | 婚姻是男人和女人间的神圣结合 |
[17:39] | not man and man, and certainly not between the races, | 不是男人与男人 更不是不同种族之间 |
[17:42] | except for Spaniards and Asians. | 西班牙佬和亚洲佬另说 |
[17:44] | They make Filipinos, who are great looking and desperate for cash. | 他们能制造菲律宾佬 长得漂亮 还超能挣钱 |
[17:48] | What are you waiting for? Pull the trigger. | 愣着干嘛呢? 扣动扳机啊 |
[17:51] | I don’t know if I can do this. | 我看自己下不去手 |
[17:52] | You’re a weak, bloated land whale. | 你就是个弱爆的肥肿陆地鲸 |
[17:54] | Why did I even lug that stupid boudoir up here? | 我当初干嘛硬把梳妆台搬上来 |
[17:57] | Freeze, you weak, bloated land whale. | 不许动 你个弱爆的肥肿陆地鲸 |
[18:00] | Why is everyone picking on me? | 为毛谁都挑我的刺? |
[18:02] | Gimme! Gimme! | 给我 给我 |
[18:14] | I’m such a dick. | 我真是个孙子 |
[18:23] | Gimme that! Gimme that! | 给我拿来 给我拿来 |
[18:25] | Uh! Gimme! | 给我 |
[18:26] | I don’t usually hit women, but I have no other choice. | 一般我不打女人 但现在别无选择了 |
[18:31] | Hey, let me go! | 嘿 放开我 |
[18:36] | Kegels. | 凯格尔万岁 |
[18:47] | This is terrible. | 太糟糕了 |
[18:49] | I’ll never look in a mirror again. | 我再也不要照镜子了 |
[18:51] | It’s gonna make it really tricky when you shave. | 那你刮胡子可小心刮坏脸哦 |
[18:54] | I just want Jonah to be okay. | 但愿Jonah平安无事 |
[18:55] | Well, I want him to be more than okay, because I love him more than you do. | 我要比平安无事更好的结果 因为我爱他胜过你爱他 |
[18:59] | Oh, Steve, we’re not in competition. | Steve 这事儿咱俩不用比的 |
[19:01] | We love him in different ways. | 我们爱他的方式不同啊 |
[19:02] | Your love is innocent and simple. | 你的爱纯真而简单 |
[19:04] | Ours is nasty and dirty, violent and sexual. | 我们的爱 龌龊肮脏 暴力性感 |
[19:08] | Good news, everyone. The patient’s going to make it. | 好消息 大家伙 病人马上就没事了 |
[19:10] | Yay, he’s alive. | 太好了 他活下来了 |
[19:11] | – Oh, thank God. – Hell yeah. | – 谢天谢地 – 赞透了 |
[19:14] | Oh, one minor detail. | 对了 有个小事儿 |
[19:15] | – He’s not your father. – What? | – 他不是你父亲 – 什么? |
[19:17] | How do you know that? | 凭啥这么说? |
[19:19] | I know that because he’s a bear. | 他是一只熊 我才这么说 |
[19:21] | – A bear? – I [Bleep] A bear? | – 熊? – 我干了一只熊? |
[19:23] | Ooh, even I think that’s bad. | 我都有点消化不了了 |
[19:25] | Yes, he had a bad case of the mange. | 没错 他得了严重的兽疥癣 |
[19:26] | Most of his fur fell out, but now he’s as good as new. | 多数毛都已经掉光了 不过现在全好了 |
[19:29] | Damn it, I bet he was a human. | 该死 我打赌他是人 |
[19:31] | I thought that was a lock. | 肯定在里边藏着呢 |
[19:32] | You definitely have a gambling problem. | 你绝对有嗜赌问题 |
[19:35] | When we’re done with you, mon, you’re gonna be nothing but a mustache. | 等我们搞定你 怪兽 你就只剩胡子了 |
[19:40] | Well, at least he didn’t get me pregnant. | 不管怎样 他没把我肚子搞大 |
[19:54] | Good-bye, old bear. | 再会了 老熊仔 |
[19:56] | Just so you know, I’m not mad at you for lying to me and breaking my heart. | 只管放心 我不会生气 虽然你骗我又伤了我的心 |
[19:59] | Steve, we both saw things in this bear that we wanted to see, | Steve 这头熊让我们看到了各自想看到的东西 |
[20:02] | but we learned from this. | 而且从中学到东西 |
[20:04] | Yeah, I learned I don’t need a father to make me a man. | 是啊 我认识到自己不需要老爸也能成为男人 |
[20:07] | These past few days, I learned how to ride a bike, and I almost beat up a woman. | 过去这几天 我学会了骑车 还差点打赢一个女人 |
[20:11] | That’s as manly as it gets. | 要多爷们儿有多爷们儿 |
[20:13] | Mmm, and I learned to be more open-minded. | 我认识到思路可以更开阔的 |
[20:15] | After being intimate with a bear, | 既然跟熊能有一腿 |
[20:17] | I’m almost ready to consider dating an Armenian. | 下一步我打算跟亚美尼亚人玩玩 |
[20:21] | Son, is that you? | 儿子 真的是你吗? |
[20:24] | Oh, no, I’m not falling for that again. | 算了吧 我可不会在一个坑里栽两回 |
[20:30] | My heart. | 我心脏 |