| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:00] | Hey, hey hey! It’s the best day of the year. | 嗨嗨嗨 今天是一年中最棒的一天 |
| [00:02] | Happy Cinco de Mayo! | 五月五日节快乐 |
| [00:05] | I don’t think you’re allowed to wear a poncho to work, Hitchcock. | Hitchcock 你没被允许穿斗篷来上班吧 |
| [00:07] | Let’s fiesta! | 狂欢起来吧 |
| [00:10] | Oh, you got a band. | 哦 你还请了乐队 |
| [00:14] | Stop, stop! No trumpets! | 停 停 不准有小号 |
| [00:16] | Not today! My head is killing me! | 今天不行 我头痛死了 |
| [00:18] | Hit the tequila a little early, huh? | 早早喝了龙舌兰吧 哈 |
| [00:20] | I’m not hung over, Hitchcock. I’ve got a tension headache. | Hitchcock 我没有宿醉 我这是压力导致的头痛 |
| [00:22] | I’ve got the Lieutenant’s exam tonight. | 我今晚有警督考试 |
| [00:23] | I’m stress-eating like crazy. | 我已经像疯了一样化压力为食欲了 |
| [00:25] | I had ten hard-boiled egg yolks this morning. | 就今天早上 我已经吃了十个煮熟的蛋黄了 |
| [00:27] | Gross. | 太恶心了 |
| [00:28] | You’re having a high-grade pre-test freak out. | 你这是高程度的考前崩溃时间 |
| [00:30] | I’ve been there. March 13, 2001. | 我也有这样的经历 在2001年3月13日那天 |
| [00:33] | AP Calc test | AP微积分考试 |
| [00:34] | Ames, I hate to cut you off, | Ames 我不想打断你 |
| [00:35] | but we all know where this story’s going. | 但是我们都知道这个故事会如何发展 |
| [00:36] | Oh, yeah? | 哦 是吗 |
| [00:37] | You know that I crapped my pants in the middle of the test? | 你知道我在考试中途拉在自己裤子上了吗 |
| [00:40] | Oh my God, no, I thought you were just gonna say | 天啦 没有 我以为你要说 |
| [00:41] | 你只得了B加啥的呢 | |
| [00:43] | – More like a BM. – Noice. | – 更像是得了BM(排便) – 棒 |
| [00:44] | Come on, now Terry’s worried about his test and his bowels! | 得了吧 现在Terry担心他的考试和他的肠胃了 |
| [00:47] | What you need, Sergeant, is to distract yourself. | 警长 你现在需要的是转移你的注意力 |
| [00:49] | NPR has a riveting six hour interview with Eileen Moon Myers. | 全国公共广播电台有个关于艾琳·穆恩·梅耶斯的六小时访谈 |
| [00:53] | Nobody knows who that is. | 没人知道她是谁 |
| [00:54] | Nobody knows the Associate Principal Cellist in the New York Philharmonic? | 没人知道纽约爱乐乐团的首席大提琴手吗 |
| [00:57] | Okay. | 行吧 |
| [00:58] | Wait! I’ve got it! I know how to distract Terry. | 等等 我知道了 我知道怎么让Terry分心了 |
| [01:01] | Captain, remember how you cancelled the last Halloween heist | 警监 还记得你为什么取消上一次的万圣节抢夺战吗 |
| [01:03] | because there was that emergency gas line explosion | 因为有一处紧急天然气管道爆炸 |
| [01:05] | and you said we had to “Help out”? | 你说我们必须去”帮忙” |
| [01:07] | Yes, I also remember | 是的 我也记得 |
| [01:08] | you refusing to believe the explosion was real. | 你不相信那是真的爆炸 |
| [01:10] | Go back to acting school, buddy. | 伙计 回表演学校再修炼一下吧 |
| [01:12] | You’re way overselling the pain here. | 你有点夸大你的疼痛了 |
| [01:14] | No one’s buying it! | 没人会买账的 |
| [01:15] | Well, it’s not like I was the only one who thought it was fake. | 对 但并不是只有我一个人觉得那是假的 |
| [01:18] | And the Oscar goes to… Trent! | 奥斯卡得主就是 Trent |
| [01:23] | You said that we should reschedule the heist for another day, | 你说我们应该把抢夺战安排到其他的日子 |
| [01:26] | so why not today? To help distract Terry? | 所以今天怎么样 帮Terry分心 |
| [01:29] | Yes! And I would love to defend my crown | 对 而且我很乐意卫冕 |
| [01:31] | after I destroyed you all last year. | 自从我去年了碾压你们所有人 |
| [01:32] | Well, I mean, the proposal was all part of my plan. | 呃 我觉得 求婚是我计划的一部分吧 |
| [01:35] | All I remember is you bowing to me on your knees. | 我只记得你朝我跪下了 |
| [01:37] | Yeah, I was asking you to marry me. | 对 我是想让你嫁给我 |
| [01:39] | Well, you look like a fool. | 得了 你看起来像个傻子 |
| [01:40] | Neither of you won, | 你们俩都没赢 |
| [01:41] | because Jake swapped out the real championship cummerbund | 因为Jake偷偷换了真正的冠军腹带 |
| [01:44] | Belt. | 腰带 |
| [01:45] | For the treacly proposal one. | 换成了甜蜜求婚版 |
| [01:46] | What? | 什么 |
| [01:46] | I thought everyone loved that I used the heist to do the proposal. | 我以为大家都喜欢我用抢夺战来求婚呢 |
| [01:48] | You are wrong, everyone hated it, but it helped me win. | 你错了 大家都讨厌它 不过这帮我获胜了 |
| [01:51] | During your engagement celebration, | 在你们庆祝订婚的时候 |
| [01:53] | I snuck back, and found the original cummerbund. | 我偷偷溜回来 找到了正版的腹带 |
| [01:56] | Belt. | 腰带 |
| [01:56] | It’s hanging up in my living room at home. | 它现在正挂在我家客厅的墙上 |
| [01:58] | I never thought I’d say this, but enough foreplay! | 我永远也没想到我会说这个 不过前戏够多了吧 |
| [02:00] | Are we heisting or not? | 我们要不要举行抢夺战 |
| [02:01] | – Yes! – Of course! | – 要 – 当然 |
| [02:02] | Wait, I will only do this under one condition. | 等等 我只会在这一种情况下举行抢夺赛 |
| [02:05] | Sergeant Jeffords agrees that this will help his nerves. | 那就是Jeffords警长同意这样能减轻他的紧张 |
| [02:08] | Yeah, I mean, I would like to take my mind off the test. | 是的 我是说 我很乐意暂时忘记考试 |
| [02:11] | And maybe I’ll win this year! | 而且或许我今年会赢呢 |
| [02:13] | Ah, the heist is already working. | 啊 抢夺战已经开始发挥作用了 |
| [02:14] | Sergeant Jeffords has recovered his sense of humor. | Jeffords警长已经恢复他的幽默感了 |
| [02:17] | Hey! | 嘿 |
| [02:18] | All right, but for real, though. | 好吧 不过说真的 |
| [02:19] | Are we doing this? | 我们真的要举行吗 |
| [02:20] | – We’re doing this! – Heist! | – 我们要举行抢夺战 – 抢夺战 |
| [02:21] | – Heist! – Heist! | – 抢夺战 – 抢夺战 |
| [02:22] | It’s a Cinco de Mayo heist! | 这是五月五日节抢夺战 |
| [02:24] | A Cinco de Mayo heist makes just as much sense as Halloween! | 五月五日节抢夺战和万圣节抢夺战一样合理 |
| [02:27] | Let’s do it! | 开始吧 |
| [02:48] | Welcome one and all to the | 欢迎各位来到 |
| [02:50] | first ever Cinco de Mayo Halloween Heist 6! | 第一届五月五日万圣节抢夺战六 |
| [02:54] | We’re still working on the title. | 我们没还没想好名称 |
| [02:56] | – No need, I love it! – Thank you, Charles. | – 不用了 我喜欢这个名字 – 谢谢你 Charles |
| [02:57] | Now, before we go any further, | 现在 在此之前 |
| [02:59] | we should probably choose an item to steal. | 我们应该先选一个要偷的东西 |
| [03:01] | Does anyone have anything valuable on them? | 有人带着什么值钱的东西吗 |
| [03:03] | Maybe some jewelry? | 一些珠宝之类的 |
| [03:04] | I have a medical alert bracelet | 我有一个医用报警手环 |
| [03:05] | that tells people my name and address, | 它能告诉人们我的名字和住址 |
| [03:08] | in case I have a brain collapse. | 以防我突然晕厥 |
| [03:09] | Perfect, this year’s champion will be | 完美 今年的冠军 |
| [03:10] | whoever’s in possession of Scully’s very upsetting bracelet at midnight tonight. | 就属于今晚午夜时分能拿到Scully这个烦人手环的人 |
| [03:13] | I take my test at 6:30. | 我下午六点三十就要考试 |
| [03:15] | You know what, Terry? You’re kind of making this a nightmare. | 你知道吗 Terry 你好像把抢夺战变成了一场噩梦 |
| [03:16] | Maybe you just shouldn’t participate. | 或许你就不应该参与 |
| [03:17] | So this really isn’t about helping out Sergeant Jeffords? | 所以这不是为了帮助Jeffords警长 |
| [03:19] | – What? – I guess I’m out. | – 什么 – 我觉得我该退出 |
| [03:20] | But, no, no, no, no, come on. | 但是 不不不 别啊 |
| [03:21] | Of course I’m 100% in support of Terry. | 我当然是百分百支持Terry的 |
| [03:24] | In fact, I’m going to team up with him. | 其实 我要和他组队 |
| [03:25] | Let’s do this! | 来吧 |
| [03:27] | You are so easily manipulated. | 你太容易被操纵了 |
| [03:28] | Now you’re stuck with Sergeant Dumb Dumb. | 现在你和傻傻警长捆绑在一块了 |
| [03:31] | – Damn it. – Hey. | – 该死 – 嘿 |
| [03:32] | Santiago, shall we join forces? | Santiago 我们组队吧 |
| [03:34] | Ooh, smart, teaming up with the reigning champ. | 哦 机智 和卫冕冠军组队 |
| [03:37] | Again with this nonsense? I’m the reigning champ. | 又说这种蠢话 我才是卫冕冠军 |
| [03:40] | The only thing you won last heist | 上次抢夺战中 你唯一赢得的 |
| [03:41] | was the lifetime of mediocre heterosexual intercourse with Jake. | 是与Jake长达一辈子的无趣异性恋性交 |
| [03:45] | How dare you. | 你怎么敢 |
| [03:46] | No one thinks you won last year. | 没人觉得你上次赢了 |
| [03:48] | Wow, really thought the “How dare you” | 哇 我还以为那句”你怎么敢” |
| [03:49] | was going to be linked to his mean sex comment, but okay. | 是和他刻薄的性爱评论有关呢 不过行吧 |
| [03:52] | Right, sorry. I’ll have you know. | 对的 不好意思 我告诉你 |
| [03:53] | Jake and I wear each other out every single night. | 我和Jake每晚都让彼此”精疲力竭” |
| [03:57] | Good lord, overcompensating. You know what? | 天啦 有点过了 你知道吗 |
| [03:58] | Maybe we just shouldn’t talk about this at work. | 或许我们不应该在工作场合谈论这个 |
| [04:00] | I’m texting Kevin to bring the cummerbund. | 我在给Kevin发短信 让他带来那条冠军腹带 |
| [04:03] | You’ll see who the real winner is, you braggy breeders. | 让你们这些爱自夸的异性恋们看看谁是真正的赢家 |
| [04:06] | A lot of infighting. | 内讧够多了 |
| [04:07] | Not too late to ditch Amy and team up with this pussycat burglar. | 现在抛弃Amy 和我这位”小奶猫大盗”组队还不算太晚 |
| [04:11] | Please, Boyle, your only value was | Boyle 得了吧 你唯一的价值就是 |
| [04:12] | you had a doppelganger which no longer matters | 你有一个如今已经无法起作用的分身 |
| [04:14] | since Bill died in that accident. | 因为Bill在那次事故中去世了 |
| [04:16] | – RIP, Bill. – So sad. – Tragic. | – Bill 愿你安息 – 真难过 – 悲剧啊 |
| [04:17] | I can still be useful without Bill! | 没有Bill我也是一样有用 |
| [04:19] | No hole’s too tight for these tiny tips. | 对于这双小手来说 世界上就没有狭窄的洞 |
| [04:22] | For stealing stuff! | 是为了偷东西 |
| [04:23] | Well, fine. | 行吧 |
| [04:25] | Looks like I’ll just team up with my friend Rosa. | 看来我只能和我的朋友Rosa组队了 |
| [04:26] | I’m out. Five heists was enough. | 我退出 五次抢夺战已经够了 |
| [04:28] | We’ve exhausted every possibility of this thing. | 这事已经没有别的可能了 |
| [04:30] | Literally nothing new can happen. | 真的不会有什么新鲜事发生了 |
| [04:32] | It’s boring. | 就很无聊 |
| [04:32] | You can have a long lunch with me instead. | 不过你可以和我吃个漫长的午餐 |
| [04:33] | Ooh, lunch? The devil’s breakfast. | 哦 午餐 那可是恶魔的早餐 |
| [04:36] | – Well, forget it. – Okay, I won’t call it that! | – 算了吧 – 别 我不会那样叫它了 |
| [04:37] | I just want to be included in something! | 我只是想参与进来 |
| [04:39] | Okay, that whole lunch thing was clearly a ploy. | 好的 那套关于午餐的说法显然只是个幌子 |
| [04:42] | But even still, I’m not worried about losing to Boyle. | 不过 我不担心会输给Boyle |
| [04:44] | No one is. He’s a joke. | 没人担心 他就是个笑话 |
| [04:46] | All right, let’s get this thing going. | 行 现在开始吧 |
| [04:47] | Scully will be locked in the supply closet with his bracelet. | Scully和他的手环会被关在储藏室里 |
| [04:50] | Can I lie down on the floor? | 我可以躺在地上吗 |
| [04:51] | Uh, yeah. You can do whatever you want. | 嗯 你想做什么都可以 |
| [04:54] | And you’re already on the ground. | 你已经躺在地上了 |
| [04:54] | With Hitchcock. And you both have pillows. | 和Hitchcock一起 你俩还带了枕头 |
| [04:56] | Best day ever! | 最棒的一天 |
| [04:59] | There. Now they’re locked in. | 好了 他们已经被锁在里面了 |
| [05:01] | Arrange your affairs. | 做好准备 |
| [05:02] | The heist begins in five minutes. | 抢夺战五分钟后开始 |
| [05:04] | Five minutes? But this whole thing was so last second! | 五分钟吗 这事情真的是太突发 |
| [05:05] | I don’t even have any plans or supplies! | 我甚至还没有任何计划和道具 |
| [05:07] | I have so many plans and supplies. | 我有超多计划和道具 |
| [05:09] | I even have a victory banner | 我甚至还有一条胜利横幅 |
| [05:10] | that unfurls with a voice command. | 它是通过语音指令声控打开的 |
| [05:11] | I can’t say what, but it’s so cool. | 我不能说是什么 不过真的很酷 |
| [05:13] | I thought this was a spur-of-the-moment fun way | 我觉得这个有趣的一时冲动 |
| [05:15] | to distract me from freaking out about my exam! | 可以让我从我的考试崩溃中分心 |
| [05:17] | Well, it wasn’t exactly hard to predict, Sarge. | 警长 这并不难猜到 |
| [05:18] | Your catchphrase is “Terry hates tests.” | 你的口头禅是”Terry讨厌考试” |
| [05:21] | It’s true. Terry hates tests! | 是真的 Terry讨厌考试 |
| [05:22] | But the point is, I planned everything, | 重点是 我计划好了所有事情 |
| [05:24] | starting with Scully’s bracelet. | 从Scully的手环开始 |
| [05:25] | It had to be the prize because I have prepared | 奖品必须是它 因为我准备了 |
| [05:27] | the greatest reveal in heist history. | 抢夺战史上最精彩的反转 |
| [05:28] | Allow me to introduce you to… | 请允许我为你介绍 |
| [05:32] | Other Scully. | 另一个Scully |
| [05:34] | Hi, I’m Earl, Norm’s twin brother. | 嗨 我是Earl 是Norm的双胞胎兄弟 |
| [05:36] | Why’s Scully never mentioned | 为什么Scully从来没提过 |
| [05:38] | he had a twin before? | 他有个双胞胎兄弟 |
| [05:39] | Because no one talks about their siblings with coworkers. | 因为没有人会和同事聊自己的兄弟姐妹 |
| [05:41] | I’ve told you about my brother Lawrence. | 我和你聊过我的兄弟Lawrence啊 |
| [05:43] | Nope, and I don’t want to learn about him | 你没有 而且我也不想听 |
| [05:43] | and I already forgot his name. | 而且我已经忘记他的名字了 |
| [05:45] | Now let’s go. It’s time to heist! | 咱们出发吧 抢夺战要开始了 |
| [05:47] | No movement yet. | 目前还没有什么动静 |
| [05:48] | So here’s our plan. | 我们的计划是这样的 |
| [05:49] | After watching everyone coo over your maudlin proposal, | 看到所有人都为你们的求婚热泪盈眶之后 |
| [05:52] | I’ve decided we should employ a similar diversion. | 我决定用类似的方法转移注意力 |
| [05:54] | – Smart, I’m in. – You will tell Jake | – 聪明 算我一个 – 你要告诉Jake |
| [05:56] | you are pregnant with his child. | 你怀了他的孩子 |
| [05:57] | What? I’m not pregnant. | 什么 我没怀孕啊 |
| [05:58] | Here is a positive pregnancy test | 这是阳性验孕结果 |
| [06:00] | and a sonogram of your fetus. | 这是你胎儿的超声波图 |
| [06:01] | Congratulations. It’s a girl. | 恭喜你 是个女孩 |
| [06:03] | Feels a little mean to play with Jake’s feelings like that, sir. | 我感觉这样玩弄Jake的感情有点过分了 长官 |
| [06:05] | You’re right, it is mean. | 你说的对 的确过分了 |
| [06:07] | Too bad. | 可惜 |
| [06:07] | As your mentor, I command you to do it. | 作为你的导师 我命令你这么做 |
| [06:10] | Wow, okay. | 哇 好吧 |
| [06:11] | Perhaps we should discuss some other options. | 或许我们应该讨论一下别的选择 |
| [06:14] | There’s no time, look. | 没时间了 你看 |
| [06:15] | Peralta’s going for the bracelet! | Peralta奔着手环去了 |
| [06:17] | How’d he get him free so quickly? | 他怎么这么快就解开了 |
| [06:19] | See ya later, losers! | 回见 窝囊废们 |
| [06:20] | Not so fast! | 别急 |
| [06:23] | What the hell was that? | 这他妈是什么情况 |
| [06:24] | That Fitbit I gave you at Christmas? | 还记得我圣诞节送你的那个运动手环吗 |
| [06:26] | I modified it into a taser. | 我把那个改造成了电击枪 |
| [06:28] | What? Do you even want me to get into shape? | 什么 你到底想不想让我健身了 |
| [06:30] | Yeah, but not as much as I want to win. | 想啊 但我更想赢 |
| [06:32] | Buzz buzz, bitch. | 电你哟 小贱人 |
| [06:33] | I’ve got Scully. Come on, let’s go. | Scully到我手上了 快 赶紧走 |
| [06:37] | No! Nooo! | 不 不要 |
| [06:41] | Yes. | 太好了 |
| [06:43] | Fake heist went perfectly. | 假抢夺战非常顺利 |
| [06:45] | So did the real heist. | 真抢夺战也是 |
| [06:47] | Why is your face twitching like that? | 你的脸为什么在抽搐 |
| [06:48] | Oh, Amy tased me a bunch. | 哦 Amy狠狠电了我 |
| [06:49] | I bit my own tongue. It was awesome. | 我咬到了自己的舌头 精彩极了 |
| [06:51] | Was it hard to get through the door? | 打开那扇门困难吗 |
| [06:52] | No. I’m strong as hell. | 不难 毕竟我强壮如牛 |
| [06:53] | The hard part was getting this bracelet off Scully’s wrist. | 最难的是把手环从Scully手腕上弄下来 |
| [06:55] | How can you even feel your hand with this thing so tight? | 戴了这么紧的东西 你的手还能有有知觉的吗 |
| [06:58] | You’re supposed to feel your hand? | 原来手应该要有知觉的吗 |
| [06:59] | Well, that’s terrifying. | 这可真是吓人 |
| [07:00] | Now if you’ll excuse me | 我先告辞一下 |
| [07:01] | I’m going to hide the old bracelet | 去藏好老手环 |
| [07:03] | and win me this heist. | 让我赢得这个抢夺战 |
| [07:04] | Don’t you mean win us this heist? | 你是说让”我们”赢得这个抢夺战吧 |
| [07:05] | Oh, Terrence, | 噢 Terrence |
| [07:06] | unfortunately I do not. | 不幸的是”我”还真没这个打算 |
| [07:10] | What the hell? | 什么鬼 |
| [07:11] | Sorry, Sarge. | 对不住了 警长 |
| [07:12] | – It had to be this way. – Why? | – 我不得不这么做 – 为什么 |
| [07:13] | The banner only has my name on it. | 因为横幅上只有我的名字 |
| [07:15] | It’s really all about the banner. | 真的纯粹是因为横幅的问题 |
| [07:16] | It unfurls by a voice command. | 它是声控展开的 |
| [07:17] | But I promise that I will mention | 但我保证我会在我的获胜演讲中 |
| [07:19] | both you and Earl Scully in my victory speech. | 提到你和Earl Scully的名字 |
| [07:21] | Wait, Earl’s here? | 等等 Earl在这吗 |
| [07:22] | Yeah. He helped us with the heist. | 对啊 他在抢夺战里帮了我们忙 |
| [07:23] | I told that son of a bitch | 我告诉过那个臭傻逼 |
| [07:25] | never to show his face in New York again! | 不许再出现在纽约了 |
| [07:27] | Why are you running towards the glass? | 你为什么在冲着玻璃跑 |
| [07:31] | You’re a dead man, Earl! | 你死定了 Earl |
| [07:34] | That’s not great. | 这可不妙 |
| [07:35] | You’re a dead man, Jake! | 你死定了 Jake |
| [07:36] | Uh, that’s much worse. | 呃 这更不妙 |
| [07:38] | Squirt more lube and help me yank. | 挤点儿润滑剂 过来帮我拔 |
| [07:40] | Ugh, you know that fun braggy recap | 呃 你还记不记得每次赢了之后 |
| [07:43] | we do at the end of each win? | 我们都会进行有趣的吹牛总结 |
| [07:44] | Can we leave this part out? | 我们这回能不做了吗 |
| [07:45] | Yes. | 可以 |
| [07:46] | We’ll make up a cooler thing. | 我们再想出来一个更酷的 |
| [07:47] | But for now, we lube and yank. | 但目前来讲 我们先润滑再抽拔 |
| [07:49] | Wrap your legs around him to anchor yourself. | 用你的腿卷住他来固定自己 |
| [07:52] | Yep. Here we go. | 好 开始吧 |
| [07:55] | Earl? Earl! | 是Earl吗 Earl |
| [07:57] | Norm Norm? | |
| [07:59] | – Norm? – What the– | – Norm – 什么鬼 |
| [08:01] | I’m so happy your friend invited me to– | 我很高兴你的朋友邀请我来 |
| [08:02] | I told you what would happen | 我告诉过你如果我再见到你 |
| [08:03] | if I ever saw you again, Earl. | 会有什么后果 Earl |
| [08:05] | What is going on? What am I looking at? | 这是什么情况 我都看到了什么 |
| [08:07] | Scully has a twin brother named Earl. | Scully有一个双胞胎兄弟Earl |
| [08:09] | Jake brought him here to trick you. | Jake把他带来骗你们 |
| [08:10] | Thank you for the ride, Terrence. | 谢谢你载我这一程 Terrence |
| [08:12] | Apparently they don’t get along very well. | 很显然他们俩关系不太好 |
| [08:14] | We did get along. We were inseparable, | 我们以前关系很好 形影不离 |
| [08:16] | until Earl slept with my wife. | 直到Earl睡了我老婆 |
| [08:17] | It’s not my fault she wanted to have sex with a stud instead of a dud. | 她想要和种马上床而不是和哑弹上床 这又不是我的错 |
| [08:20] | Stud? Your face looks it’s been kicked in by a horse! | 什么种马 你的脸看起来像被马踢了 |
| [08:23] | Well, your mouth looks like a butthole! | 是吗 你的嘴长得像个屁眼 |
| [08:24] | Your whole body looks like a butthole. | 你全身长得都像屁眼 |
| [08:26] | And you look identical. | 而你们长得一模一样 |
| [08:30] | Should we help Scully? | 我们该帮Scully吗 |
| [08:31] | I’m not touching this. | 我可不想碰这一摊 |
| [08:38] | There’s nowhere to run, Earl! | 你跑不了 Earl |
| [08:40] | Well, that was a real mind eff. | 这可真是让人颠覆认知的一出好戏 |
| [08:43] | – Good-bye. – Just so you know, | – 再见 – 告诉你们一声 |
| [08:44] | Jake has the bracelet in his pocket. | 手环在Jake的口袋里 |
| [08:46] | Why would you tell them that? We’re a team! | 你为什么要告诉他们 我们是一队的 |
| [08:47] | You locked me up. | 你把我锁了起来 |
| [08:48] | Yeah, but they didn’t know that! | 的确 但他们不知道啊 |
| [08:49] | There’s no bracelet in his pocket! | 他口袋里没有手环 |
| [08:51] | What? There should be. | 什么 不应该啊 |
| [08:53] | Where’d it go? | 它去哪了 |
| [08:56] | – Shalom, partner. – Dope. | – (希伯来语)您好啊 搭档 – 牛逼 |
| [08:58] | And you thought Shlomo Ben-Yisrael wouldn’t come through. | 你还觉得Shlomo Ben-Yisrael不能成功完成任务 |
| [09:00] | No, I said the name and the costume were offensive, | 不 我说的是这个名字和戏服会冒犯到别人 |
| [09:03] | bordering on actionable. | 在法律的边缘试探 |
| [09:04] | Well, it worked. | 不管怎样 这成功了 |
| [09:05] | Jake brought in Scully’s twin | Jake把Scully的孪生兄弟带来 |
| [09:07] | just like I planned when I connected them on Facebook, | 正如我在脸书上给他们牵线搭桥时设想的那样 |
| [09:09] | but he had no idea they hated each other. | 但他完全不知道他们互相憎恨 |
| [09:11] | And when everyone was fighting, | 结果当所有人都打得不可开交时 |
| [09:12] | they were too distracted to notice old Shlomo. | 根本没人注意到老Shlomo |
| [09:14] | They all underestimated me, Rosa, | 他们都低估了我 Rosa |
| [09:16] | but today, they will learn the error of their ways, | 但今天 他们会为这一错误付出代价 |
| [09:18] | for today, | 因为在今天 |
| [09:19] | I will prove that nobody gets the best of Charles Boyle. | 我要证明Charles Boyle是无可匹敌的 |
| [09:22] | I doused your beard in chloroform. | 我之前把你的胡子泡在麻醉剂里了 |
| [09:24] | Really? I find that very hard to beli– | 是吗 我可不怎么相 |
| [09:35] | – Where’s this goin’? – All the way to Trenton. | – 要寄到哪 – 寄到特伦顿去 |
| [09:36] | Take your time. | 慢慢来 |
| [09:38] | Aah, perfect. | 啊 完美 |
| [09:40] | What? What happened? | 啥 发生了什么 |
| [09:41] | – You know where the bracelet is? – No. | – 你知道手环在哪了吗 – 不 |
| [09:42] | Kevin has arrived with proof that I am the only two-time winner of the heist. | Kevin带来了我是唯一抢夺战两连胜的证据 |
| [09:45] | Here’s your cummerbund, Raymond. | 这是你的金腰带 Raymond |
| [09:47] | We don’t have time for this, sir! | 我们没时间了 长官 |
| [09:48] | I’m gonna go search the first floor. | 我去搜查一楼 |
| [09:50] | And I will search the second floor. | 那我去搜查二楼 |
| [09:52] | We are an inseparable team. | 我们是形影不离的队友 |
| [09:54] | That was a devious fib. | 那是个邪恶的小谎言 |
| [09:56] | I’m betraying her even as we speak. | 就连我们说话的时候我都在背叛她 |
| [09:59] | – Hey, Kev. – Diaz and I are covertly working together. | – 嘿 Kev – Diaz和我在偷偷合作 |
| [10:02] | She snuck up through the vents. | 她从通风管潜行过来的 |
| [10:04] | This is a major reveal. | 这是个重大反转 |
| [10:06] | I feel like you’re not appreciating it. | 我感觉你并没有领略到它的意义 |
| [10:07] | I don’t like these heists, | 我不喜欢这些抢夺战 |
| [10:08] | or what they bring out in you. | 或者说它们让你展现的样子 |
| [10:09] | – Oh, clam it, Kevin. – “Clam it”? | – 噢 憋说了 Kevin – “憋说了” |
| [10:11] | Cheddar, perhaps we should leave. | Cheddar 或许我们该走了 |
| [10:12] | No, Cheddar stays. | 不行 Cheddar得留下来 |
| [10:14] | He still has an important role to play. | 他扮演着重要的角色 |
| [10:15] | Give me Mr. Hootsworth. | 把猫头鹰先生给我 |
| [10:18] | No one would ever think of | 没有人会想到 |
| [10:19] | looking for the bracelet in Cheddar’s favorite chew toy. | 去Cheddar心爱的咀嚼玩具里找手环 |
| [10:22] | Or do you mean Jake’s favorite chew toy? | 或者说你的意思是 Jake心爱的咀嚼玩具 |
| [10:27] | Well, thank God no one was around to hear that. | 感谢老天爷 附近没人听到我说了什么 |
| [10:31] | Ah! There you are. I’ve been looking all over. | 啊 你在这儿啊 我到处找你 |
| [10:33] | Woah. That’s a lot of yolks. | 哇 这可是一大堆蛋黄 |
| [10:35] | Are you stress eating again | 你又在压力性进食吗 |
| [10:36] | or is this just a small Terry snack? | 还是说这只是常规的Terry小零食 |
| [10:37] | I’m stress eating, Jake! | 我这是压力性进食 Jake |
| [10:38] | My snack yolks are in that bowl. | 我的零食蛋黄在那个碗里 |
| [10:39] | Oh. Well, stop eating eggs | 哦 别吃鸡蛋了 |
| [10:41] | and come help me with the heist! | 快来帮我一起抢夺战 |
| [10:42] | – I’m not helping you. – Why not? | – 我拒绝 – 为什么 |
| [10:44] | Ugh, is this because I once betrayed you? | 呃 是因为我之前背叛了你吗 |
| [10:46] | Yes! It was our last interaction. | 是的 那是我们最后一次交流 |
| [10:47] | And it was a huge mistake | 并且是个巨大的错误 |
| [10:49] | and I now realize that our friendship | 我现在明白了 我们的友谊 |
| [10:50] | is way more important than any stupid banner. | 比那个愚蠢的横幅更珍贵 |
| [10:52] | Look, the bracelet is in Cheddar’s chew toy. | 听着 手环在Cheddar的咀嚼玩具里 |
| [10:54] | I know because I bugged Holt’s cummerbund. | 我知道 因为我在Holt的冠军腹带上装了窃听器 |
| [10:56] | – You did? – Yes! | – 真的吗 – 真的 |
| [10:57] | I figured he would bring it in to show off. | 我料到他会带过来炫耀 |
| [10:59] | Now let’s do this! | 咱们赶紧下手吧 |
| [11:00] | I don’t know. | 我不太确定 |
| [11:01] | Look, Sarge, I’m sorry, okay? | 听着 警长 我诚心向你道歉 |
| [11:02] | I can’t undo the past, but come on. | 我没法纠正过去 但是说真的 |
| [11:04] | Would you rather win the heist with me | 你宁愿和我一起赢得抢夺战 |
| [11:06] | or sit around swallowing eggs | 还是坐在这里吞鸡蛋 |
| [11:07] | like Birdo from “Super Mario 2”? | 像超级马里奥2里面的Birdo |
| [11:08] | Birdo doesn’t eat eggs. Birdo spits them! | Birdo不吃蛋 Birdo吐蛋 |
| [11:11] | Oh, my God, you got that reference, Terry? | 天啊 你居然懂这个梗 Terry |
| [11:12] | We’re the perfect team! | 我们简直就是最佳拍档 |
| [11:14] | Come on, Sarge, please? | 来吧警长 求你了 |
| [11:16] | – Fine, I’ll help. – Ah! Wonderful. | – 行吧 我帮你 – 啊 太棒了 |
| [11:18] | But, before you fully commit, | 但是 在你完全投入之前 |
| [11:19] | I should probably give you the heads-up. | 我得先警告你 |
| [11:21] | My plan is very elaborate | 我的计划非常复杂 |
| [11:22] | and you might get a little messy. | 你可能会搞得很脏 |
| [11:23] | I’m in. It’s the heist, baby! | 我加入了 这可是抢夺战 |
| [11:25] | Now let me know how we get that chew toy. | 现在说说我们要怎么搞到那个咀嚼玩具 |
| [11:27] | All right! Okay. | 好的 听好了 |
| [11:28] | First, I infiltrate Holt’s office | 首先 我会潜入Holt的办公室 |
| [11:30] | and continue our argument about who won last year’s heist. | 继续和他争论去年抢夺战的胜者是谁 |
| [11:32] | How many cummerbunds are you holding right now? Zero! | 你手上现在有几条冠军腹带 零条 |
| [11:35] | It’s one bund to none, son! Tell him, Kevin. | 我手握腹带 你一无所有 快告诉他 Kevin |
| [11:38] | – I’m leaving. – It doesn’t matter– | – 我走了 – 无关紧要 |
| [11:39] | As Holt argues with me | 我一边和Holt争吵 |
| [11:40] | I will be covertly releasing more water into Cheddar’s bowl. | 一边偷偷地往Cheddar的碗里放更多的水 |
| [11:43] | Then we sit back and wait for… | 然后我们就坐等 |
| [11:46] | Potty time again? | 又要上厕所 |
| [11:47] | – What if he takes him downstairs? – He won’t. | – 万一他把狗带到楼下呢 – 他不会的 |
| [11:49] | I spent a lot of time making clandestine searches on Holt’s computer. | 我花了很长时间在Holt的电脑上进行秘密定向搜索 |
| [11:52] | Now all of his targeted ads direct him straight to… | 现在他所有的定向广告都是 |
| [11:55] | The Puppy PeePee Pad. Intriguing. | 狗狗尿尿垫 有趣 |
| [11:58] | He bought one and put it out on the roof | 他买了一个放在露台上 |
| [11:59] | next to Gina’s golden statue. | 就在Gina的金雕像旁边 |
| [12:01] | And, because he believes that Cheddar deserves to pee in privacy | 接着 因为他相信Cheddar上厕所时应该不受打扰 |
| [12:03] | like any other self-respecting adult, | 像其他有自尊心的成年人一样 |
| [12:05] | he will leave Cheddar outside alone to do his business. | 他会让Cheddar独自解决生理问题 |
| [12:08] | Notify me when you’re done, via bark. | 完事了通知我 汪一声 |
| [12:10] | While Holt guards the door, | 趁Holt守着门口 |
| [12:11] | you’ll be swapping out Mr. Hootsworth | 你就把猫头鹰先生调包 |
| [12:13] | for this. | 用这个 |
| [12:14] | That all sounds great, | 这听起来都挺不错 |
| [12:15] | but how do I get onto the roof without Holt noticing? | 但我要怎么上露台 不让Holt发现 |
| [12:17] | Oh, Sarge. You’ll already be out there… | 哦警长 你早就在露台上了 |
| [12:19] | In a perfect golden disguise. | 穿着完美的金色伪装 |
| [12:23] | The plan worked! I got it! | 计划成功 我拿到手了 |
| [12:25] | Oh my God, you look like an Oscar. | 哦我的天 你看起来就像一座奥卡斯小金人 |
| [12:27] | Ooh! We should take a picture | 我们得合个影 |
| [12:28] | where it looks like I’m holding you. | 我假装把你捧在手里 |
| [12:29] | – Jake. -You’re right. There’s no time. We’ll do it later. | – Jake – 对的 时间不够 待会儿再拍 |
| [12:31] | No, we won’t! Help me get this paint off! | 我们不会拍的 快帮我把金漆弄掉 |
| [12:33] | Okay, put your hands out and | 好的 把手伸出来 |
| [12:33] | I’ll squirt you with a little makeup remover. | 我拿卸妆水给你喷一喷 |
| [12:35] | Hi-ya! | 嘿呀 |
| [12:36] | No! | 不 |
| [12:37] | You’re betraying me again? Why? | 你又背叛我了 为什么 |
| [12:40] | Because of the banner! | 因为那条横幅 |
| [12:41] | But I thought you said our friendship was more important! | 你不是说我们的友谊更珍贵吗 |
| [12:42] | Yeah, that was obviously a lie. | 嗯 很明显我撒谎了 |
| [12:44] | The banner was very expensive! | 那条横幅很贵的 |
| [12:46] | I don’t have a lot of money, Sarge. | 我钱不多的 警长 |
| [12:47] | All right, bye. | 好的 再见 |
| [12:49] | Don’t make a lot of noise. | 别发出太响的声音 |
| [12:52] | Howdy. I just got back from lunch with Charles, who is not here. | 大家好 我刚和Charles吃过午饭回来 他现在不在 |
| [12:55] | I am real glad I skipped the heist. | 我很高兴我没参加抢夺战 |
| [12:57] | Say, who is winning? | 话说 现在谁领先 |
| [12:57] | I don’t know, but I know that I am not winning. | 不知道 我只知道不是我 |
| [13:00] | Interesting, it is also not me. | 有趣 也不是我 |
| [13:01] | Uh, why are you guys acting so weird? | 呃 你们为什么这么诡异 |
| [13:03] | Gah, weird? | 什么 诡异 |
| [13:04] | Would a person who is acting weird laugh like this? | 一个诡异的人会这样笑吗 |
| [13:07] | A huh-huh huh-ha, carefree! | 哈哈 哈 哈 无忧无虑 |
| [13:08] | – Yes. – Jake! | – 是的 – Jake |
| [13:10] | Oh, Terry, you ripped yourself free. | 哦 Terry 你把自己挣脱了 |
| [13:12] | Yeah, maybe you should try cuffing me | 是啊 你下次该试试 |
| [13:14] | to a stronger metal next time. | 把我铐在一个更牢固的金属上 |
| [13:15] | Yeah, I don’t know the relative strength of metals. | 嗯 我并不知道什么金属更牢固 |
| [13:17] | What’s going on? | 怎么回事 |
| [13:18] | Why does Terry look like an Oscar? | 为什么Terry看起来像一座奥斯卡小金人 |
| [13:19] | – Doesn’t he? – He has the bracelet! | – 对吧 – 手环在他手上 |
| [13:21] | We grabbed Mr. Hootsworth from Cheddar | 我们从Cheddar那夺走了猫头鹰先生 |
| [13:23] | and swapped it for a fake! | 调了个包 |
| [13:24] | Wow, Terry, my betrayals were all in good fun, | 哇 Terry 我背叛你都只是开玩笑 |
| [13:27] | but this really hurts. | 但你也太伤人了 |
| [13:28] | Cheddar, bring me Mr. Hootsworth. | Cheddar 把猫头鹰先生给我 |
| [13:32] | It’s an updated model. | 这是新版 |
| [13:33] | The bowtie is Turkish blue instead of Egyptian blue. | 领结是土耳其蓝 不是埃及蓝 |
| [13:36] | How could you not have noticed this? | 你怎么会没发现 |
| [13:38] | Because he’s a dog. | 因为它是条狗 |
| [13:39] | And at the end of the day a dog is no match for Jake Peralta. | 说到底 一只狗怎么比得上Jake Peralta |
| [13:44] | Well yours is a fake, too. Turkish blue bowtie. | 你的也是假的 土耳其蓝色的领结 |
| [13:46] | Oh, come on! The one time I say out loud I’m smarter than a dog? | 哦拜托 我唯一一次说自己比狗聪明就这么输了 |
| [13:48] | If I have a fake and you have a fake, | 如果我的是假的 你的是假的 |
| [13:50] | who took the real bracelet? | 那谁拿了真正的手环 |
| [13:51] | – I did. – Kevin? | – 我拿了 – Kevin |
| [13:53] | I swapped out Mr. Hootsworth for a fake | 我把猫头鹰先生调包了 |
| [13:54] | while you were arguing with Peralta. | 就在你和Peralta争吵的时候 |
| [13:56] | How many cummerbunds are you holding right now? Zero! | 你手上现在有几条冠军腹带 零条 |
| [13:57] | It’s one bund to none, son! | 我手握腹带 你一无所有 |
| [14:00] | You betrayed me? But why? | 你背叛了我 为什么 |
| [14:02] | I can’t have more of these trophies in our home. | 我们家里不能再摆这些奖品了 |
| [14:04] | The cummerbund was already in the living room. | 客厅里已经挂了一条冠军腹带 |
| [14:05] | What’s next, | 下一个是什么 |
| [14:06] | a rusty medical bracelet suspended above our bed? | 床头悬一个生锈的医疗手环 |
| [14:08] | Yes! Now hand it over. | 没错 快把它交出来 |
| [14:10] | I don’t have it. I gave it to Amy. | 不在我手里 我给了Amy |
| [14:12] | Santiago Santiago. | |
| [14:13] | – You betrayed me as well? – You betrayed me first. | – 你也背叛了我 – 你先背叛我的 |
| [14:15] | You were working with Rosa this whole time. | 你一直和Rosa暗中勾结 |
| [14:17] | That wasn’t real. I was always gonna stab her in the back. | 又不是真的 我一直就打算背地里捅她一刀 |
| [14:19] | You were? | 什么 |
| [14:20] | What kind of person treats another human being like that? | 你怎么能对别人这么恶毒 |
| [14:22] | You tricked me, Rosa! | 你骗了我 Rosa |
| [14:24] | And then you shipped me to New Jersey! | 然后你把我寄到了新泽西州 |
| [14:25] | First of all, grow up. | 第一 成熟点 |
| [14:26] | Second of all, how’d you get back here so fast? | 第二 你怎么这么快就回来了 |
| [14:28] | If you get a box wet enough, | 只要把纸箱弄得够湿 |
| [14:29] | it’s very easy to bust out of it. | 很容易就能破箱而出 |
| [14:31] | No one ask any follow-ups! | 大家别问下去 |
| [14:32] | I knew I couldn’t trust you, Rosa. | 我就知道信不过你 Rosa |
| [14:33] | That’s why I was going to double-cross you with Bill. | 所以我打算用Bill背叛你 |
| [14:36] | That’s right, he didn’t really die. | 没错 他根本没死 |
| [14:38] | Hey, guys, | 嘿 大家好 |
| [14:38] | you really thought I’d miss this year’s heist? | 你们真的以为我会错过今年的抢夺战吗 |
| [14:40] | No way, I’m part of the squad. | 没门 我可是你们小组的一员 |
| [14:41] | – No. – Not true. | – 不 – 你不是 |
| [14:42] | Okay, this is official getting hard to track. | 好的 现在真的跟不上了 |
| [14:44] | Who has the bracelet now? | 手环现在在谁手里 |
| [14:46] | Santiago Santiago. | |
| [14:47] | Yeah! And none of you are getting it! | 对 你们休想抢走 |
| [14:48] | We’ll see about that. | 话别说太早 |
| [14:51] | What the hell? | 什么鬼 |
| [14:52] | Remember that very fancy Swiss pen I got you for Christmas, | 还记得我圣诞节送你的那支瑞士名牌笔吗 |
| [14:54] | the one that you keep in your pocket at all times? | 你一直放在口袋里的那支 |
| [14:56] | It’s a taser, bro. | 那也是电击枪 兄弟 |
| [14:58] | – Uuugh! – I’ll take that. | – 呃啊啊 – 这个归我了 |
| [15:00] | Amy, do not make me tase you again. | Amy别让我再电你一次 |
| [15:02] | No, no, no, no, don’t! I’m pregnant! | 别别别 我怀孕了 |
| [15:04] | – What? – I just found out. | – 什么 – 我刚得知 |
| [15:06] | – It’s a girl. – Oh, my God! | – 是个女孩儿 – 哦我的天 |
| [15:07] | Oh my God, it’s happening! | 哦我的天 真的发生了 |
| [15:09] | Quick, someone get a reaction video of me becoming an uncle! | 快 来个人录一下我成为叔叔的反应视频 |
| [15:11] | She’s making it up. The pregnancy scam was my idea. | 她在撒谎 怀孕骗局是我想出来的 |
| [15:14] | No. No, no, no, no, Amy. | 不 不不不 Amy |
| [15:15] | Wait, is that true? Did you just lie to me about our baby? | 等等 是真的吗 你刚刚拿我们的孩子骗我 |
| [15:17] | Did you lie to us about our baby? | 你刚刚拿我们的孩子骗我们 |
| [15:19] | – You tased me! – You tased me first! | – 你电了我 – 是你先电我的 |
| [15:21] | Enough! Terry’s had enough of this. | 够了 Terry受够了 |
| [15:23] | This was supposed to be just a fun game | 这本来就是个好玩的游戏而已 |
| [15:25] | but it’s turned you all into terrible people. | 结果把你们一个一个的都变成了可怕的人 |
| [15:28] | Betraying your husband, putting your friend in the mail. | 背叛你的丈夫 把朋友打包快递走 |
| [15:30] | Jake and Amy, did you guys buy each other any gifts this year | Jake和Amy 您二位今年给对方买过 |
| [15:33] | that weren’t tasers? | 任何不是电击枪的礼物吗 |
| [15:35] | – No. – No. | – 没有 – 没 |
| [15:35] | You all pretended that this was all about | 你们都装的好像这件事是为了帮我 |
| [15:38] | helping me with my test. | 摆脱考试压力一样 |
| [15:39] | But none of you cared one bit! | 但你们根本没人关心 |
| [15:41] | You know what? You all suck! | 知道吗 你们都糟透了 |
| [15:44] | Oh no, my voice command. Terry, look out! | 别别别 我的语音指令 Terry 小心 |
| [15:49] | Okay. I know that was bad, | 好的吧 我知道这场面很不好 |
| [15:51] | but let’s not jump to any conclusions about whose fault it was. | 但是我希望大家不要立刻就下结论说这是谁的错 |
| [15:55] | *Jacob Peralta, Jacob Peralta* | *Jacob Peralta啊 Jacob Peralta* |
| [15:59] | *This was all his clever plan* | *这全都是他的妙计* |
| [16:02] | Wow, what a fun improvised song. | 哇 这首即兴演奏听起来挺好玩 |
| [16:05] | *This was all his clever plan* | *这全都是他的妙计* |
| [16:07] | His eyes aren’t focusing | 他的视线不能集中 |
| [16:09] | and he hasn’t referred to himself in the third person in minutes. | 他这会儿也没有用第三人称称呼自己 |
| [16:12] | He’s clearly concussed. | 明确的脑震荡了 |
| [16:13] | Guys, this is bad. | 同志们 坏事了 |
| [16:14] | The Lieutenant’s exam is in 30 minutes. | 警督考试30分钟内就要开始了 |
| [16:16] | Okay, look, let’s just get him to One Police Plaza | 这样 我们先把他挪到警局大楼 |
| [16:18] | and hopefully he’ll wake up on the way. | 希望他在路上能清醒过来 |
| [16:20] | – Charles, help me pick him up. – Copy that. | – Charles 帮我搭把手 – 收到 |
| [16:22] | He’s too heavy. We can’t do this. | 太重了 搬不动 |
| [16:24] | God! How does he lift weights and also lift his arms? | 我去 他到底是怎么能举起自己胳膊的时候还能举铁的 |
| [16:26] | This is impossible. We’ll never get him there. | 完全不可能 我们没法把他弄到大楼去 |
| [16:28] | So you guys need help moving a body? | 你们是需要人帮忙把人运走吗 |
| [16:29] | Thank God old Bill’s part of the squad. | 谢天谢地 该是小队里Bill出场的时候了 |
| [16:31] | I mean, assuming, I am part of the squad. | 我是说 假设 我是小队的一份子的话 |
| [16:36] | – Yes, sure. – Totally. | – 当然 – 当然 |
| [16:37] | Oh, yes, finally. I have somewhere to live. | 太好了 终于 我有住的地方了 |
| [16:40] | – What? – Meet me in the alley next to my shopping cart. | – 啥 – 在下一个巷子我的购物车旁碰头 |
| [16:42] | It’s the one with all the cans. | 都是罐头的那个 |
| [16:43] | Seems like his plan is | 听起来他的计划就是 |
| [16:44] | just to put Terry in the shopping cart. | 把Terry放进购物车里 |
| [16:45] | Correct. We’ll take it! | 没错 就这么办 |
| [16:53] | Room 410 is this way! | 410室在这边 |
| [16:55] | Okay, we got him here with one minute to spare. | 好的 我们提前一分钟把他送过来了 |
| [16:57] | Yes! I knew we could make it. All right, Sarge. | 好的 我就知道我们能做到 好了 警长 |
| [16:58] | You ready to go in there and ace this thing? | 你准备好进去并且傲视群雄了吗 |
| [16:59] | Yeah, I can’t believe it, I’m gonna be a pilot! | 是的 难以置信我就要成为飞行员啦 |
| [17:02] | Okay, well, that’s not great. | 得 行吧 这可不太妙 |
| [17:03] | There’s no way he can take the test in that condition! | 他这个样子绝对没法考试 |
| [17:05] | You’re right. Amy, you’re going to have to crawl inside his shirt | 没错 Amy 你得钻进他衣服里 |
| [17:07] | and operate his arms for him. | 操控他的胳膊 |
| [17:08] | It’s a Ratatouille situation. | <料理鼠王>情景重现 |
| [17:09] | – On it. – No. It’s over. | – 这就照办 – 别 到此为止 |
| [17:11] | We have to go in there and tell them that he won’t be making it. | 我们要进去跟他们说 Terry没法考试了 |
| [17:13] | So that’s it then. | 那就这么办吧 |
| [17:15] | Rosa, you should probably go in first since | Rosa 或许你第一个进去 |
| [17:16] | – this is mostly your fault. – Dude. | – 毕竟这基本上是你的错 – 哥们 |
| [17:17] | All right, fine, I’ll do it, jeez. | 行行行 我先去 天啦 |
| [17:21] | Wait. Where is everyone? Where are all the desks? | 等会 人呢 桌子都去哪儿 |
| [17:24] | What is happening? | 这是什么情况 |
| [17:25] | What’s happening is… | 目前情况就是 |
| [17:30] | You all suck! | 你们都糟透了 |
| [17:31] | *You all are losers, you all are losers* | *你们都是蠢货 你们都是蠢货* |
| [17:35] | *And Terry Jeffords is the best!* | *Terry Jeffords是最棒的* |
| [17:37] | *You are all losers, you are all losers* | *你们都是蠢货 你们都是蠢货* |
| [17:40] | *And Terry Jeffords is the best* | *Terry Jeffords是最棒的* |
| [17:42] | Son of a bitch stole my song. | 这混蛋偷了我的歌 |
| [17:46] | Wait, Terry has the bracelet? | 等等 Terry拿着手链 |
| [17:47] | That’s right. Me and my teammate Terry won. | 正是这样 我和我的队友Terry赢啦 |
| [17:51] | We fooled you all. | 我们把你们都蒙了 |
| [17:53] | You didn’t do [bleep]! | 你他妈啥都没干 |
| [17:54] | Okay, well, neither did Jordan’s teammates, | 行吧 不过乔丹的队友也啥都没干呀 |
| [17:56] | but they still got rings. | 他们照样有总冠军戒指 |
| [17:57] | All right, fine. Just tell us how you did it. | 行了 先这样 跟我们说说你的诡计 |
| [18:00] | Well, first, for my plan to work, | 好 首先 我的诡计能成功的前提 |
| [18:01] | it had to happen on a day when I could control everything. | 是要发生在我能掌控一切的日子里 |
| [18:04] | I couldn’t let it be Halloween. | 万圣节肯定不行 |
| [18:05] | You faked the gas explosion! | 你伪造了燃气爆炸事故 |
| [18:07] | Yeah, stupid actors almost blew it. | 没错 那个蠢演员差点毁了一切 |
| [18:09] | What was with that moaning, Trent? | 你那个哀嚎是怎么回事 Trent |
| [18:11] | I thought you studied at the Lee Strasberg Institute! | 我以为你是在李·斯特拉斯伯格学院学的表演 |
| [18:13] | It doesn’t mean anything. They just take your money! | 那学院屁用没有 给钱就能上 |
| [18:14] | Oh, that is a huge relief. | 好了我终于没有负罪感了 |
| [18:16] | I felt so bad about | 我本来还很抱歉来着 |
| [18:16] | poking that guy’s wound to make sure it was real. | 因为我戳了那货的伤口判断伤是不是真的 |
| [18:18] | You should still feel bad about that. | 你还是应该觉得抱歉的 |
| [18:20] | No, it was all fake. I’m totally absolved. | 怎么会 都是假的 我完全无罪了 |
| [18:21] | Continue with your story, Sarge. | 警长 继续说你的故事 |
| [18:23] | I knew you’d suggest a heist | 我就知道你们会提议进行抢夺战 |
| [18:24] | as a distraction from my Lieutenant exam, | 为了让我不要被警督考试折磨疯 |
| [18:26] | then all I had to do was sit back | 我所要做的就是静观其变 |
| [18:28] | and watch as everyone took things way too far. | 看着每个人都越来越过分 |
| [18:31] | But how’d you know we’d get so out of hand? | 但是你怎么能知道我们会这么失控呢 |
| [18:32] | I spent the last six months sowing the seeds of conflict. | 我花了六个月的时间种下了嫌隙的种子 |
| [18:36] | Man, I am so sick of Jake | 天呢 我真的是受够了Jake |
| [18:38] | saying he is the only two-time Halloween heist winner. | 一直说他是唯一二度蝉联万圣节抢夺战赢家的人 |
| [18:40] | I’m the only two-time Halloween heist winner. | 我才是唯一二度蝉联万圣节抢夺战赢家的人 |
| [18:43] | I can’t believe everyone says | 我简直不敢信大家都说 |
| [18:44] | you’re not helpful during the Halloween heist. | 你对万圣节抢夺战毫无帮助 |
| [18:45] | Just because they all think your fingers are too big. | 因为他们觉得你手指头太粗了 |
| [18:50] | We’ll show them. | 等着瞧 |
| [18:50] | Thanks for inviting me over for dinner. | 感谢你邀请我来吃晚饭 |
| [18:53] | Boy, that’s hung in a real prominent place, isn’t it? | 我天 这玩意真是挂在相当显眼的位置哈 |
| [18:56] | Not for long. | 不会再挂多久了 |
| [18:57] | I was manipulated? | 我被操纵了 |
| [18:58] | – Sorry, Kevin. – Don’t apologize to him, Terry. | – 抱歉 Kevin – 不用道歉 Terry |
| [18:59] | It’s his first heist. | 这是他第一次参加抢夺战 |
| [19:00] | He needs to learn. Keep going. | 他需要学习 继续说 |
| [19:02] | Well, after I got everyone acting like maniacs, | 等我让所有人都疯了之后 |
| [19:04] | all I had to do was make you feel bad by “Knocking myself out.” | 我要做的 就是”砸晕自己” 让你们良心不安 |
| [19:09] | The banner. | 那个横幅 |
| [19:09] | But how did you learn my voice command? | 不过你是怎么弄到我的语音指令的 |
| [19:11] | I didn’t have to. I sold you the damn thing! | 我根本不需要弄 那玩意是我卖给你的 |
| [19:14] | No. | 不 |
| [19:15] | I want it to unfurl when I say, “You all suck.” | 我希望当我说”你们都糟透了”的时候它能展开 |
| [19:18] | Absolutely. | 没问题 |
| [19:19] | Pleasure doing business with you. | 跟你合作很愉快 |
| [19:20] | The pleasure was all mine. | 愉快的是我 |
| [19:24] | That’s gonna work. | 这能行的 |
| [19:25] | I spent $1,800 on that thing! | 我花了1800美金啊 |
| [19:27] | – You did? – Amy, stop interrupting. | – 你花了那么多钱 – Amy 不要打断人家 |
| [19:30] | Terry’s doing his big speech. | Terry正演讲呢 |
| [19:30] | Anyway, once my fake concussion was on display, | 无论如何 只要我开始脑震荡表演 |
| [19:34] | I created the perfect distraction | 我就为我的搭档提供了完美的 |
| [19:36] | for my partner to do his job. | 实施计划的条件 |
| [19:41] | Cheddar, you duplicitous bitch. | Cheddar 你这个两面间谍小混球 |
| [19:43] | I’ve been training Cheddar for months. | 我训练了Cheddar好几个月 |
| [19:45] | Wow, what a fun improvised song! | 哇 这首即兴演奏挺有意思 |
| [19:48] | When I swapped the Hootsworths, | 我换掉它的玩偶猫头鹰先生的时候 |
| [19:49] | I put a magnetic collar on him! | 在他身上放了磁铁项圈 |
| [19:51] | From there, Cheddar followed us all the way to One Police Plaza | 从那开始 Cheddar跟了我们一路过来警局大楼 |
| [19:55] | where he hand-delivered | 在这间屋子的门外 |
| [19:56] | the bracelet to me right outside this room. | 它亲自把手链转移给了我 |
| [19:59] | But, wait, what about the Lieutenant’s exam? | 不是 那警督考试呢 |
| [20:01] | Aren’t you supposed to be taking it right now? | 你现在不是应该在考试吗 |
| [20:02] | Hell no, I took that thing weeks ago. | 当然不是 那玩意几周前就考了 |
| [20:04] | And I passed! I’m already a lieutenant! | 而且我考过了 我现在是警督了 |
| [20:06] | – You are? – That’s incredible! | – 是吗 – 太好了 |
| [20:08] | – Lieutenant Jeffords! – This is amazing. | – Jeffords警督 – 太棒了 |
| [20:10] | I’m so proud of you, Terry. | 我为你骄傲 Terry |
| [20:12] | All right. You’ve overstepped now, Bill. | 行了 你有点过界了 Bill |
| [20:14] | Yeah, it’s weird you’re here, Bill. | 没错 你在这的存在真的很诡异 Bill |
| [20:16] | To Terry Jeffords, the ultimate human being | 为Terry Jeffords 地表最强人类 |
| [20:18] | slash genius. Nice work…Lieutenant. | 以及天才 做的不错 警督 |
| [20:21] | – Yeah! – Thanks, squad! | – 呦吼 – 谢谢大家 |
| [20:23] | Also the next heist will be at Halloween, | 顺便 下次抢夺战是在万圣节 |
| [20:25] | so you’ll only be champion for six months. | 所以你只能做六个月的赢家 |
| [20:27] | – This is half a win at best. – Sounds about right, yeah. | – 这顶多算半赢 – 是这么回事没错 |
| [20:29] | – Yeah. – Pretty garbage. | – 嗯 – 超垃圾的 |
| [20:31] | Hey, Scully, so you and Earl made up? | 嘿 Scully 你和Earl和好了 |
| [20:32] | Yup. Hitchcock helped us realize | 是的 Hitchcock帮我们意识到 |
| [20:33] | we shouldn’t fight just because we’re so different. | 我们不应该因为彼此太过不同而打来打去 |
| [20:35] | Yeah. To our differences! | 没错 为我们的不同干杯 |
| [20:40] | Oh, dang it! | 哎呀 该死 |
| [20:43] | Ooh, double dang it. | 哎呀 该死乘二 |
| [20:44] | – What? – Oh, my God. | – 啥 – 我去 |
| [20:46] | Terry, what you did today was awesome | Terry 你今天简直 精彩绝伦 |
| [20:48] | and I just wanted to say I’m sorry if I took things too far. | 我想说 如果我表现得过分了的话 我很抱歉 |
| [20:51] | Are you kidding me? | 逗我呢吗 |
| [20:52] | I was just guilting you as a tactic. | 让你愧疚只是我得战略 |
| [20:54] | I love how crazy the heist gets. | 我超级爱抢夺战的疯狂 |
| [20:55] | Okay, good, ’cause what I really wanted to say | 好的 很好 因为我真正想说的是 |
| [20:57] | is next heist I’m gonna drown you in your own blood. | 下次抢夺战 我要把你浸在你自己的血里 |
| [21:00] | Oh, yeah? Well, then I’m gonna rip your arms off | 是吗 那我就把你的胳膊卸下来 |
| [21:01] | and beat you to death with ’em. | 用它们把你揍死 |
| [21:02] | Oh! | 噢 |
| [21:03] | I’m going to slice your Achilles’ tendons, | 我会切断你的跟腱 |
| [21:04] | peel off your fingernails | 剥下你的指甲 |
| [21:05] | and stick knitting needles in your eyes. | 把编制针插进你的双眼 |
| [21:07] | Oh, damn. | 我去 |
| [21:08] | Raymond, you were right. | Raymond 你是对的 |
| [21:09] | These heists are fun. | 抢夺战挺有意思的 |