| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | Howie, slow down. | 华仔 吃慢点 |
| [00:08] | I can’t. | 不行 |
| [00:08] | I’m not allowed to eat for 12 hours before my surgery, | 手术之前12小时都不能吃东西 |
| [00:11] | and I only got two more minutes. | 我只剩两分钟了 |
| [00:16] | What surgery are you having? | 你也要动什么手术吗 |
| [00:19] | I’m stress eating. | 我是压力型暴饮暴食 |
| [00:20] | My best friend’s getting a vasectomy tomorrow. | 我最好的朋友明天要去结扎了 |
| [00:24] | And you’re sad you won’t be able to bear his child? | 你是难过自己再也没机会怀他宝宝吗 |
| [00:28] | Oh, my goodness. | 我的天 |
| [00:29] | If it’s “Vasectomy gone wrong” videos, | 如果是”结扎手术失误”视频集锦 |
| [00:31] | he’s seen them all. | 他已经全部看过了 |
| [00:32] | Including the one of the guy who’s sitting | 包括一个男人看起来像坐在哈密瓜上 |
| [00:34] | on what appears to be a cantaloupe but is not. | 但其实是他自己血肿蛋蛋的那个视频 |
| [00:38] | And I’m done. | 我不吃了 |
| [00:41] | They’re going to start making Professor Proton’s science show again. | 他们要重新开拍《质子教授科学秀》节目了 |
| [00:44] | I thought he passed away. | 我还以为他已经过世了 |
| [00:45] | He did. | 没错 |
| [00:46] | He was cremated, and his remains were put in a baking soda volcano. | 他火化后 骨灰都投进了小苏打火山里了 |
| [00:46] | 儿童科学节目常有的科学小实验 水中加入几勺苏打粉 再加一点白醋能像火山爆发 | |
| [00:52] | Don’t make jokes. He meant a lot to Sheldon. | 别乱开玩笑 他对谢尔顿意义重大 |
| [00:54] | Oh, me, too. I grew up watching his show. | 我也一样 我是看着他节目长大的 |
| [00:56] | He’s one of the reasons I became a scientist. | 他是我成为科学家的原因之一 |
| [00:58] | Thought you did it just to get girls. | 我还以为你是为了把妹呢 |
| [01:02] | Joke’s on you. It worked. | 哈哈 我不是把到你了吗 |
| [01:05] | Have they found anyone to replace him? | 他们找到接班人了吗 |
| [01:07] | No, not yet, and it won’t be easy. | 不 还没有 这可不简单 |
| [01:09] | Arthur Jeffries was an accomplished scientist. | 亚瑟·杰弗里斯是一个成就颇丰的科学家 |
| [01:12] | You know who’d make a great Professor Proton? | 你知道谁可以演好质子教授吗 |
| [01:15] | Meryl Streep. | 影后梅丽尔·斯特里普 |
| [01:18] | She’s not a scientist. | 她不是科学家 |
| [01:20] | Uh, then explain to me why | 那你告诉我 |
| [01:21] | she has chemistry with literally everyone. | 为什么她和每个人都能产生化学反应 |
| [01:26] | It would be nice if they cast a woman. | 如果他们能让女演员来演也不错 |
| [01:28] | Oh, you’ve already got Doctor Who and the Ghostbusters. | 你们已经有了《神秘博士》和《捉鬼特工队》 |
| [01:30] | Leave us something. | 给我们男人剩点吧 |
| [01:32] | Who do you think it should be? | 你觉得应该让谁演 |
| [01:34] | Well, it should be a scientist I respect. | 应该选一个我敬重的科学家 |
| [01:37] | You know, someone with a pleasing voice | 一个声线悦耳动听 |
| [01:39] | and symmetrical facial features. | 五官均匀对称的人 |
| [01:42] | Is he talking about himself? | 他是在说他自己吗 |
| [01:43] | If he’s talking, he’s talking about himself. | 他说话时 都是在说自己 |
| [01:46] | I just know how much Professor Proton touched me as a child, | 我只知道质子教授在我小时候触碰了我心 |
| [01:50] | and I feel that I owe it to him | 我觉得我应该还他这份情 |
| [01:52] | to try and touch as many children as possible. | 也该像他那样去”触碰”更多孩子 |
| [02:00] | You should put that on your audition tape. | 你该把这句话放进试镜视频里 |
| [02:32] | You doing okay? | 你还好吗 |
| [02:33] | No, I’m very nervous. | 不 人家紧张死了 |
| [02:47] | Where are you going? | 你要去哪里 |
| [02:48] | Gift shop. | 礼品店 |
| [02:49] | There is no gift shop. Sit down. | 这里没有礼品店 给我坐下 |
| [02:53] | This was your idea. | 这也是你自己的主意啊 |
| [02:55] | So was having sex, and look where that got us. | 滚床单也是我的主意 你看看后果多严重 |
| [02:59] | This isn’t a big deal. Stop whining. | 这没什么大不了的 别唧歪了 |
| [03:02] | When you were in labor and I said that, you kicked me. | 你生娃时我也说过同样的话 结果你踹了我 |
| [03:06] | Howard Wolowitz? | 霍沃德··沃罗威茨 |
| [03:10] | – Want me to go with you? – No. | -要我陪你进去吗 -不用 |
| [03:12] | – I’ll be fine. – Yeah, we got this. | -我没事 -对啊 我俩可以的 |
| [03:14] | Sit down! | 给我坐下 |
| [03:20] | Wish me luck. | 祝我好运吧 |
| [03:23] | Other way, buster. | 走错方向了 小子 |
| [03:31] | Okay, you ready? | 你准备好了吗 |
| [03:32] | Yeah, almost. | 差不多了 |
| [03:33] | I’m working on my facial expressions. | 我正在练习我的面部表情 |
| [03:35] | See, uh, I’ve got interested. | 看 这是我燃起兴致的表情 |
| [03:38] | I’ve got very interested. | 这是兴致高昂的表情 |
| [03:41] | Enraged. | 暴怒的表情 |
| [03:46] | Why would you be enraged? | 你怎么会暴怒呢 |
| [03:48] | Hmm. Better to have it and not need it | 准备要万全 平日多烧香 |
| [03:49] | than to need it and not have it. | 好过临时抱佛脚 |
| [03:52] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [03:56] | And… | 准备… |
| [03:56] | rolling. | 开拍 |
| [03:58] | Hello. I am theoretical physicist, Dr. Sheldon Cooper, | 大家好 我是理论物理学家 谢尔顿·库珀博士 |
| [04:01] | auditioning for the role of Professor Proton. | 为质子博士一角试镜 |
| [04:03] | Now, excuse me while I get into character. | 现在 请允许我进入角色 |
| [04:09] | Hello. I am Professor Proton. | 大家好 我是质子教授 |
| [04:12] | And today, boys and girls, | 今天 孩子们 |
| [04:14] | we’re going to have fun with science. | 我们要一起进入有趣的科学世界 |
| [04:16] | Did you know you could calculate the mass of an electron | 你知道可以用手边的家庭用品 |
| [04:18] | using household items? It’s true. | 计算出电子的质量吗 真的可以呢 |
| [04:20] | All you’ll need is a pencil, some paper, | 你只需要一支铅笔 一些纸 |
| [04:23] | dry ice, rubbing alcohol, | 干冰 外用酒精 |
| [04:25] | and a spool of 50-micron-thick cobalt-60 wire. | 和一卷50微米细的钴60线轴 |
| [04:30] | And, remember, don’t put it in your mouth, | 要记得 别把线轴放进嘴里 |
| [04:32] | or instead of becoming a scientist, | 不然你没变成科学家 |
| [04:33] | you’ll become wildly radioactive. | 就先变成放射狂人了 |
| [04:37] | Hang on. I have a question. | 等一下 我有个问题 |
| [04:39] | Do you have any experiments that aren’t life-threatening? | 你有其他没有致命危险的实验吗 |
| [04:42] | Come on! That was a perfect take, and you ruined it. | 不是吧 人家拍得好好的 全被你毁了 |
| [04:46] | Oh, look! Hey, I did need enraged. | 你看 我暴怒的表情用上了 |
| [04:54] | – Really hurts, huh? – No. | -看来真的很痛啊 -不痛 |
| [04:55] | He’s just saying, “Ow can these prices be so low”” | 他只是在说”哎哟 这价格太划算了” |
| [05:00] | It’s gonna be okay. A day or two of rest, | 别担心 只需休息一两天就好 |
| [05:02] | and you’ll be fine. | 你会好起来的 |
| [05:04] | You know nothing about Jewish people. | 那你真是不懂戏精犹太人了 |
| [05:10] | Um, let me go check on her. | 我去看看她 |
| [05:13] | Okay, uh, this is a bit awkward. | 好了 现在有一点小尴尬了 |
| [05:16] | It says here that I need to check the area | 手册上写我需要检查一下手术部位的 |
| [05:18] | for redness and swelling. | 发红和肿胀情况 |
| [05:22] | You know what? It hurts so much, go ahead. | 我已经痛到麻木了 随你便吧 |
| [05:27] | So you see, boys and girls, | 所以孩子们 |
| [05:29] | H, or helicity, is the natural variable to use relativistically | H 也就是螺旋性 是使用相对论的自然变量 |
| [05:34] | is defined as S dot P, divided by the magnitude of P. | S·P 再除以P的量 |
| [05:38] | So the next time someone on the playground tells you | 所以下次如果操场上有人告诉你 |
| [05:40] | you can only use integral values for the matrix | 你只能用整数值来 |
| [05:42] | that determines the spin of the antiproton, | 决定反质子的自旋 |
| [05:44] | you stop being friends with that kid, | 别和那孩子做朋友 |
| [05:45] | ’cause he’s going nowhere. | 因为他肯定成不了材 |
| [05:51] | Until next week, this is Professor Proton saying, | 我们下周再会 质子教授跟大家说 |
| [06:03] | That’s “Bye” in ASCII binary, | 是美国信息交换标准代码二进制数的”拜” |
| [06:05] | or good-binary. | “二”个拜 拜拜 |
| [06:15] | So, what do you think? | 你们觉得如何呢 |
| [06:19] | Well, I already told him that I loved it, | 我已经跟他说我觉得超赞了 |
| [06:21] | but if you found it confusing or dangerous or– | 但如果你们有人觉得说得太绕 太危险… |
| [06:25] | I don’t know– three to four times too long, | 或我随便举例 比如超长了几倍时间 |
| [06:29] | now is the time to share. | 现在就可以提出你们的意见 |
| [06:32] | I… I don’t know what to say. | 我不知道说什么 |
| [06:35] | Leonard, do you know what to say? | 莱纳德 你有什么想说的吗 |
| [06:37] | Sheldon, uh, I thought it, uh… | 谢尔顿 我觉得呢… |
| [06:40] | It-it looked like you were having so much fun. | 感觉视频中的你 玩得很开心 |
| [06:45] | That’s what you used to tell me to say to Penny | 你以前也教过我用这话应付佩妮 |
| [06:47] | after one of her terrible plays. | 就在看完她难看的表演后教的 |
| [06:52] | Well, what was wrong with it? | 所以问题出在哪呢 |
| [06:53] | You know, did you find it… | 你们会觉得… |
| [06:55] | borderline psychotic? | 快接近神经病了吗 |
| [06:59] | I mean, | 我个人觉得呢 |
| [06:59] | I liked that about it, but… | 我挺喜欢这一点 但… |
| [07:02] | you guys discuss. | 请畅所欲言 |
| [07:04] | Do you remember when you were a kid | 你还记得你小时候 |
| [07:06] | and you’d watch Professor Proton? | 看质子教授的节目吗 |
| [07:08] | Of course. | 当然啊 |
| [07:09] | Well, did he ever make you– I don’t know– | 那他有过让你觉得… 比方说… |
| [07:13] | hate science and the people who do it? | 痛恨科学与搞科学的人吗 |
| [07:16] | What are you saying? | 你什么意思 |
| [07:17] | I-I just think it would be… better | 我觉得你要想改进 |
| [07:20] | if your contempt for children | 那你对儿童的不屑 |
| [07:22] | wasn’t so much in the foreground. | 就不能够这么堂而皇之 |
| [07:24] | Well, you want me to lie? | 你是要我说谎吗 |
| [07:27] | Well, it’s not lying– it’s acting. | 这不是说谎 是演戏啊 |
| [07:29] | Sheldon Cooper may not like kids, | 虽然谢尔顿·库珀不爱小孩子 |
| [07:31] | but Professor Proton loves them. | 但质子教授很喜欢孩子啊 |
| [07:33] | Interesting. | 有意思 |
| [07:36] | You know, I hadn’t really thought of it that way. | 我还没用这角度想过呢 |
| [07:38] | It-It’s similar to how I’m afraid of dogs, | 这就像是我本人很怕狗 |
| [07:41] | but my D&D character likes dogs, you know? | 但我桌游里的角色很喜欢狗一样 |
| [07:45] | But he’s allergic, so he can’t be around them. | 但他对狗过敏 所以不能接近狗狗 |
| [07:49] | Why don’t we have a dog? | 我们为什么还不养狗 |
| [07:53] | Hey, you can always reshoot it. | 你可以重拍一个啊 |
| [07:56] | Mm, I suppose. | 也是啦 |
| [07:57] | And, you know, maybe I could even get some tips | 或许这次我还能去请教 |
| [07:58] | from someone who’s acted professionally. | 有过专业演员经历的人 |
| [08:01] | Sheldon, obviously, I’d be happy to help you out. | 谢尔顿 我当然很乐意帮助你啦 |
| [08:06] | I don’t know what to say. | 我无言以对 |
| [08:11] | Hey, Sheldon. What’s up? | 谢尔顿 怎么了 |
| [08:12] | I need an acting coach. | 我需要一个演戏教练 |
| [08:15] | Would you give me Patrick Stewart’s number? | 你能给我帕特里克·斯图尔特的电话吗 |
| [08:18] | No. | 不能 |
| [08:19] | Fine. I guess you can do it. | 好吧 你来教也行 |
| [08:26] | Bernie? | 妮妮 |
| [08:30] | Where did you get a bell? | 你从哪弄来的铃 |
| [08:31] | App store. | 应用商店 |
| [08:36] | Fun. Let me see. | 真好玩 让我看看 |
| [08:39] | When you catch me, you can have it back. | 等你能抓到我了再还你手机 |
| [08:43] | You want to lie down, watch a movie? | 你想躺下一起看个电影吗 |
| [08:46] | I can’t. I got my 16-week checkup to get to, | 不行 我得去做第16周的产检 |
| [08:48] | and then I’ll pick up some Chinese for dinner. | 完事后我会买中餐外卖回来当晚饭 |
| [08:50] | I’ll take Halley with me. | 我会把哈雷带上 |
| [08:52] | You-you sure you’re not overdoing it? | 你确定你这样不会太累吗 |
| [08:54] | – No, it’s fine. – Great. | -没事 不会的 -那太好了 |
| [08:55] | Then maybe, instead of Chinese, | 那不如别买中餐 |
| [08:56] | fire up the grill and throw on a couple of steaks? | 去把烤架热了 弄几块牛排如何 |
| [09:01] | Kung pao chicken, please. | 宫保鸡丁 谢谢老婆大人 |
| [09:06] | – Oh, boy. – What? | -惨了 -怎么了 |
| [09:07] | They cast the new Professor Proton. | 他们选出新的质子教授演员了 |
| [09:10] | Is it Sheldon? | 是谢尔顿吗 |
| [09:11] | Not exactly. | 不是 |
| [09:12] | Wheaton! | 惠顿 |
| [09:14] | It’s Wil Wheaton. | 是威尔·惠顿 |
| [09:26] | How was the doctor? | 医生怎么说 |
| [09:27] | Good, but I have some news. | 一切良好 但我有个事情要说 |
| [09:30] | Don’t say twins. Don’t say twins. Don’t say twins. | 别说是双胞胎 别是双胞胎 |
| [09:32] | Don’t say twins. | 别说是双胞胎啊 |
| [09:33] | It’s not twins. | 不是双胞胎 |
| [09:34] | Oh. I mean, because I would have loved them both. | 我是说 我一定会超爱他们啦 |
| [09:39] | The doctor said I was overdoing it, | 医生说我操劳过度 |
| [09:40] | so she put me on bed rest just to be safe. | 让我在床上歇着保胎 |
| [09:43] | Oh, no. | 太心疼了 |
| [09:54] | It may not look like it, but I’m running to you! | 虽然看起来不像 但我正在朝你飞奔而去 |
| [10:09] | Hello, Arthur. | 亚瑟 你好啊 |
| [10:12] | What-what part of “Rest in peace” | “安息”这两个字 |
| [10:15] | don’t you understand? | 你是有哪个字不懂 |
| [10:19] | I suppose you’re here because you heard the news? | 我猜你会来是因为你听到消息了吧 |
| [10:22] | Sheldon, I’m a figment of your imagination. | 谢尔顿 我是从你的想象中虚构出来的 |
| [10:24] | I don’t hear news. | 不是老子听到什么消息 |
| [10:29] | You’re a grumpy figment. | 真是个暴躁的虚构体 |
| [10:33] | Look, they’re remaking your show, | 是这样的 他们要重启你的节目 |
| [10:35] | and they cast Wil Wheaton as Professor Proton. | 他们选了威尔·惠顿来当质子教授 |
| [10:39] | And the worst part is, he’s not even a scientist. | 而最糟的地方就是 他都不是科学家 |
| [10:42] | No, the-the worst part is, | 不 最糟的地方是 |
| [10:44] | I’m sitting on a moist log. | 我坐在湿哒哒的木头上 |
| [10:51] | We have to stop this and protect your legacy. | 我们得阻止这一切 保护你名声 |
| [10:54] | What legacy? | 有个毛名声啊 |
| [10:55] | My-my last two seasons, | 我节目最后两季 |
| [10:57] | I was on Sunday morningn at 5:30. | 档期是在周日早上五点半播出 |
| [11:00] | We-we were beat by Davey and Goliath. | 收视率还被陶土儿童节目给打败 |
| [11:05] | I can’t believe you don’t care. | 我真不敢相信你都不在乎 |
| [11:08] | Believe it. | 相信吧 |
| [11:11] | Well, I care, a lot, | 但我在乎 非常在乎 |
| [11:13] | and Wil Wheaton will rue the day he ever met me. | 威尔·惠顿绝对会后悔认识我 |
| [11:18] | I think that’s true of most people. | 我觉得大多数人都这么觉得 |
| [11:27] | Hi, guys. | 你们好啊 |
| [11:28] | Wanted to check in and see how you two were doing. | 就想过来看看你们俩怎么样了 |
| [11:30] | We’re okay. | 我们挺好 |
| [11:31] | Yeah, hanging out in bed with my wife, | 对啊 跟我老婆赖在床上 |
| [11:33] | thawing out some frozen peas in my pants– | 用裤裆内的体温给冻豆子化冻 |
| [11:35] | living the dream. | 宛如梦中啊 |
| [11:39] | Oh, I’ll get her. | 我去哄她吧 |
| [11:40] | I thought Raj was helping you out. | 我以为拉杰会来帮手呢 |
| [11:42] | No, he had to work. | 没来 他得上班 |
| [11:43] | Plus, he has a quota for the amount of | 再说了 关于印度仆人的玩笑 |
| [11:45] | Indian servant jokes he can tolerate, | 他的容忍是有限的 |
| [11:47] | and, apparently, I filled it. | 而我貌似已经把额度用完了 |
| [11:49] | Well, you’re… I can get the baby. | 你歇着吧 我可以去哄她 |
| [11:51] | No, Howie’s got it. He’s fine. | 不用了 华仔可以的 他能行 |
| [11:53] | Right, Howie? | 对吧 华仔 |
| [11:54] | Never better. | 比什么时候都行 |
| [11:56] | Don’t be silly. | 别傻了 |
| [11:57] | I’ll take the rest of the day off and watch Halley for you. | 我可以请假帮你们照看哈雷 |
| [12:00] | Or we can call Stuart. | 或者我们可以打给斯图尔特 |
| [12:01] | I’m sure he could close up the store, | 我敢说他肯定会马上关店 |
| [12:03] | hop on a bus, and be here in no time. | 跳上公交车 飞奔来这里 |
| [12:05] | He does love the bus. | 他的确很爱公交车 |
| [12:08] | Okay, hang on. | 等下 |
| [12:09] | Do you guys not trust me to take care of your baby? | 你俩是不相信我可以照看好你们的娃吗 |
| [12:12] | – No. – No! | -当然不是 -不是不是 |
| [12:14] | – No. – No. | -不是 -真不是 |
| [12:16] | So I-I guess… | 我觉得还是… |
| [12:18] | no. | 不行 |
| [12:22] | It’s not that we don’t trust you– it’s just… | 不是我们不信任你 只是… |
| [12:24] | you don’t seem like much of a baby person. | 你看起来不太像是喜欢小娃娃的人 |
| [12:27] | I can watch your stupid baby, okay? | 我能照看好你们的傻逼娃娃 好吗 |
| [12:31] | If she cries, I will pick her up. | 如果她哭了 我会抱她起来 |
| [12:33] | If she’s hungry, I’ll give her a bottle. | 如果她饿了 我会给她热奶 |
| [12:35] | And if she poops, I’ll light some incense. | 如果她拉粑粑了 我会点上熏香 |
| [12:39] | It would be a big help. | 那可真是帮了大忙了 |
| [12:41] | Okay. Thank you. | 好吧 谢谢你 |
| [12:42] | Trust me, you guys have nothing to worry about. | 相信我 你们俩绝对可以放一百个心 |
| [12:45] | You know, back in Nebraska, | 当年在我们老家 |
| [12:46] | I raised all our baby pigs | 我们家的小猪仔 |
| [12:47] | right until the day they were slaughtered. | 都是我一手养大到可以送去宰了 |
| [12:49] | So, unless your baby’s made of breakfast meat, | 所以除非你们娃是早餐肉做的 |
| [12:52] | she’s fine. | 否则她好着呢 |
| [12:56] | Would you ever get a vasectomy? | 你有天会去做结扎手术吗 |
| [12:58] | Uh, in case you haven’t noticed, | 或许你没有注意到 |
| [13:00] | Indians aren’t too big on birth control. | 印度人不是很喜欢计划生育 |
| [13:03] | There’s probably, like, a million more of us | 很可能从我们开始这话题到现在 |
| [13:04] | since we started this conversation. | 印度又多了一百万人口 |
| [13:10] | You okay? | 你还好吧 |
| [13:11] | No. | 不好 |
| [13:12] | No, all these comments online about Wil, | 网上所有关于威尔的评论 |
| [13:14] | they’re nothing but supportive and kind. | 一水儿全是支持和好话 |
| [13:17] | Where’s the mean, snarky Internet | 那个毒舌刻薄的互联网哪去了 |
| [13:19] | that shows up every time I get a haircut? | 怎么每次我剪完头发它就出现呢 |
| [13:23] | You know that’s us, right? | 你知道毒舌刻薄的是我们 对吧 |
| [13:28] | Well, luckily, I got the number of the company | 幸运的是 我搞到了那家 |
| [13:30] | who’s trying to reboot the show, | 试图重启这节目公司的电话 |
| [13:32] | so I need you all to call and register your displeasure. | 所以我需要你们都打去表达你们的不满 |
| [13:34] | Sheldon, no one’s gonna do that. | 谢尔顿 没人会这么做 |
| [13:36] | Not true. | 有哦 |
| [13:36] | I know of three calls they’ve received already: | 我知道已经有三个人打去表达不满了 |
| [13:38] | a-a Southern gentleman, | 一位是南方绅士 |
| [13:40] | um, a Cockney chimney sweep, | 一位是伦敦烟囱清扫工 |
| [13:43] | and, uh, | 还有一位是 |
| [13:44] | Mr. T, hmm? | T先生 |
| [13:46] | Who– spoiler alert– | 这位先生 剧透一下 |
| [13:47] | pities the fool who tries to reboot that show. | 可怜那位试图重启这节目的傻瓜 |
| [13:51] | What about tiresome lunatic with a bad haircut? | 那个发型糟糕的无聊疯子呢 |
| [13:53] | Has he called yet? | 他怎么没打去 |
| [13:55] | Come on. | 拜托 |
| [13:56] | How many times have we banded together | 多少次我们团结起来 |
| [13:58] | to try to save a show that we loved? | 一起去拯救我们热爱的节目 |
| [13:59] | L-Let’s shake things up and try to kill one. | 这次我们改变套路 把这节目扼杀在摇篮中 |
| [14:03] | Isn’t the important thing that there’s a show | 有个能让孩子喜欢科学的节目 |
| [14:05] | to get kids excited about science? | 难道不重要吗 |
| [14:07] | Who cares about kids and what they like? | 谁在乎小孩和他们喜欢什么啊 |
| [14:10] | This is about me | 这事关我 |
| [14:11] | and something I liked when-when I was a kid. | 和我还是个孩子时喜欢的节目 |
| [14:16] | What if the reboot is great? | 万一节目重启很成功呢 |
| [14:17] | That’s even worse. | 那就更糟了 |
| [14:19] | If-if I like it, | 如果我喜欢它 |
| [14:20] | I’ll feel like I’m being disloyal to Arthur. | 感觉就像背叛了亚瑟 |
| [14:22] | He was a mentor and a friend, | 他是我的导师和朋友 |
| [14:24] | and I won’t toss him aside for some Hollywood pretty boy | 我不会为了好莱坞某个帅哥 比如威尔·惠顿 |
| [14:27] | like Wil Wheaton. | 而抛弃他 |
| [14:29] | It’s hard to argue with him. | 他的话很难反驳啊 |
| [14:31] | Because he makes no sense? Yeah. | 因为他根本不讲理吗 的确是 |
| [14:36] | This is actually kind of nice, | 这感觉其实挺好的 |
| [14:37] | you and me getting to spend a couple days in bed together. | 你我有机会一起在床上赖几天 |
| [14:40] | Yeah. Pretty soon, we’re gonna have | 是啊 很快我们家 |
| [14:42] | two crying babies in the house. | 就会有两个哇哇叫的宝宝了 |
| [14:44] | I’m glad my balls hurt. It’s all their fault. | 我很高兴我蛋疼 因为全是它们的错 |
| [14:50] | Well, let’s just enjoy this quiet time | 让我们一起享受这宁静的时光 |
| [14:52] | while we still got it. | 趁现在还有机会 |
| [14:53] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [14:56] | Yeah, it is really quiet. | 但这也太安静了吧 |
| [14:59] | You think Penny’s doing okay? | 你觉得佩妮能应付得来吗 |
| [15:01] | Penny, everything all right?! | 佩妮 一切还好吗 |
| [15:07] | Hey. All good. | 一切都好 |
| [15:07] | Dipped her pacifier in a little bourbon, she conked right out. | 往她奶嘴上沾了点酒 她立马昏睡过去了 |
| [15:13] | I hope you’re joking. | 希望你是在开玩笑 |
| [15:14] | Of course I’m joking. I don’t share my bourbon. | 当然是开玩笑啊 我才不会分享我的酒呢 |
| [15:20] | She’s joking. | 她在开玩笑 |
| [15:22] | Definitely. | 肯定是 |
| [15:24] | Probably. | 应该吧 |
| [15:29] | Wil Wheaton. Wil Wheaton. | 威尔·惠顿 威尔·惠顿 |
| [15:32] | This is Sheldon, by the way. | 对了 我是谢尔顿 |
| [15:37] | Hi, Sheldon. | 谢尔顿 |
| [15:38] | Here, I found this pizza flyer in your fence. | 给 我在你的栅栏发现这张披萨传单 |
| [15:41] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [15:42] | Okay, now you owe me a favor. | 现在你欠我个人情 |
| [15:46] | Turn down the role of Professor Proton. | 你去拒演质子教授 |
| [15:48] | I don’t think so. | 我不同意 |
| [15:50] | You can’t be Professor Proton. You’re not a scientist. | 你不能当质子教授 你又不是科学家 |
| [15:53] | Well, I was never on a starship, | 我也从没上过太空星舰 |
| [15:54] | but pretending I was bought me this house. | 但假装自己上过让我买下了这栋房子 |
| [15:57] | And if I’d pretended a little longer, | 要是我假装的时间更久 |
| [15:59] | it would have a swimming pool. | 还能买下带泳池的房子呢 |
| [16:02] | Some things shouldn’t be rebooted. | 有些东西就不该被重启 |
| [16:03] | Some things were perfect the way they were. | 有些东西本来就很完美了 |
| [16:05] | Like the walled city of York– it was a delight. | 比如有城墙的约克 非常美好 |
| [16:08] | But New York? Blech. | 但新约克[纽约] 算了吧 |
| [16:11] | Did you ever consider that maybe Arthur would be happy to know | 你有没想过 如果亚瑟得知他的节目比他还长寿 |
| [16:14] | that his show has outlived him? | 会很高兴呢 |
| [16:16] | I doubt it. | 我深表怀疑 |
| [16:17] | He was kind of a mean old crank. | 他是个刻薄暴躁的臭老头 |
| [16:20] | Sheldon, I promise that I will work my hardest to make this show great | 谢尔顿 我保证我会努力把节目做好 |
| [16:25] | so that a whole new generation of kids | 好让新一代的孩子们 |
| [16:27] | will grow up and they will be able to say | 长大后会说 |
| [16:28] | that Professor Proton was the reason they got into science. | 是质子教授让他们投身科学领域 |
| [16:35] | That was very persuasive. | 这番话很有说服力 |
| [16:37] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [16:38] | But I won’t be seduced by your acting skills | 但我不会被你的演技 |
| [16:40] | nor your movie star charisma. | 或电影明星魅力所诱惑 |
| [16:45] | There’s only one Professor Proton, | 质子教授只有一个 |
| [16:46] | and he had neither of those things. | 而他绝没有上述两种特质 |
| [16:49] | I’ll give you one more chance to bow out. | 我再给你一次机会退出 |
| [16:52] | Or what? | 不然怎样 |
| [16:55] | When we first met, we were enemies, | 我们初次见面时 你我是敌人 |
| [16:57] | but we worked through that and we became friends. | 但我们解决了矛盾 成为了朋友 |
| [17:01] | Do you really want to go back? | 你真想回到当初吗 |
| [17:03] | Honestly, it doesn’t feel very different. | 老实说 感觉没什么不同 |
| [17:10] | I’m not leaving! | 我不会走的 |
| [17:11] | All right, I’m gonna sic my dog on you. | 好吧 那我就放狗出来咬你 |
| [17:15] | You don’t have a dog. | 你又没有养狗 |
| [17:16] | Yes, I do. | 有的 |
| [17:19] | Ugh, I can’t tell if you’re lying– | 我分辨不出你是否在说谎 |
| [17:20] | you’re such a good actor! | 你演技太高超了 |
| [17:26] | Hey, how you doing? | 你好吗 |
| [17:27] | What are you doing here? | 你怎么来了 |
| [17:29] | Oh, I just came by, you know, | 我就顺路过来看看 |
| [17:31] | to see if you need any help. | 看你是否需要帮忙 |
| [17:34] | Howard and Bernadette asked you to check up on me. | 霍华德和伯纳黛特派你来监督我 |
| [17:36] | That is not entirely true. | 这话不全对 |
| [17:38] | So did Leonard and… everybody. | 还有莱纳德和 所有人 |
| [17:42] | How irresponsible do you all think I am? | 你们是觉得我有多不负责任啊 |
| [17:44] | We don’t think you’re irresponsible. | 我们不觉得你不负责任啊 |
| [17:46] | We think you’re… | 我们只是觉得你… |
| [17:48] | fun-loving. | 喜爱玩耍 |
| [17:51] | That is just a nice word for “Irresponsible.” | 这只是”不负责任”好听一点的说法 |
| [17:54] | You might be more on the ball than we thought. | 看来你比我们想的要机智 |
| [18:00] | I’m getting a little hungry. | 我有点饿了 |
| [18:01] | Want me to get it this time? | 这次我来吧 |
| [18:03] | That’d be great. | 那再好不过了 |
| [18:08] | This is fun. | 真好玩 |
| [18:10] | And now you also get to see an annoyed blonde walk into the room. | 你也能看到一个气鼓鼓的金发妞走进来 |
| [18:15] | What? | 干嘛 |
| [18:17] | Can you get us a little snack? | 能给我们拿点零食吗 |
| [18:19] | You sure you don’t want your spy to do it? | 不叫你们的间谍去拿吗 |
| [18:22] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么呢 |
| [18:23] | You really don’t trust me? You had to have Amy stop by? | 你们真的很不信任我 还让艾米过来看看 |
| [18:26] | – We trust you. – Yeah. | -我们信任你 -是啊 |
| [18:27] | You were a terrible waitress, | 你是个糟糕的服务员 |
| [18:29] | and we still asked you to get us a snack. | 我们还是叫你给我们拿零食了啊 |
| [18:35] | Excuse me while I go take care of your baby. | 失陪一下 我要去照顾你们的宝宝 |
| [18:37] | Then I’ll bring you your snack, | 然后我会拿零食给你们 |
| [18:38] | and you can insult me some more. | 到时你们就可以继续羞辱我了 |
| [18:42] | I don’t know about you, | 不知道你怎么想 |
| [18:42] | but I am not eating whatever she brings us. | 但我绝对不会吃她送来的食物 |
| [18:47] | Hey, Halley. Aw, it’s okay. | 哈雷 没事的 |
| [18:49] | Auntie Penny’s here. Shh. Let’s get you changed. | 佩妮阿姨来了 我帮你换尿布 |
| [18:53] | Your mommy and daddy say they trust me, | 你爸妈说他们相信我 |
| [18:55] | but they’re full of the same stuff your diaper is. | 但他们满嘴都是你尿布里现在包着的东西 |
| [18:59] | Now I feel bad. | 这下我内疚了 |
| [19:01] | Well, she never really liked me. | 反正她从没喜欢过我 |
| [19:03] | It’s kind of nice she hates you now, too. | 现在她也讨厌你 感觉还不赖 |
| [19:06] | Aw, but I’m here for you, | 但你有我呢 |
| [19:07] | and I would never let anything happen to you, | 我不会让你受到任何伤害 |
| [19:09] | because your Auntie Penny loves you so much. | 因为佩妮阿姨真的好爱好爱你 |
| [19:13] | Mama. | 妈妈 |
| [19:22] | Was that her first word? | 那是她第一个词吗 |
| [19:23] | Mama. | 妈妈 |
| [19:26] | Uh, no. No, baby. I’m not your mama. | 不不 宝宝 我不是你妈妈 |
| [19:29] | Your mama’s the nice lady we’re gonna go see right now | 你妈妈是我们现在要去见的那位善良女士 |
| [19:31] | so I can rub this in her face. | 这样我就能在她面前嘚瑟啦 |
| [19:35] | Do you hear that, suckers? | 听见了吗 你俩贱人 |
| [19:36] | She called me Mama! | 她叫我妈妈 |
| [19:53] | Hello, Arthur. | 你好 亚瑟 |
| [19:55] | You-you know, | 你知道 |
| [19:57] | we could… we could also meet in-in a deli. | 我们 我们也可以在熟食店见面的 |
| [20:05] | I’m sorry to say that I failed you. | 很抱歉告诉你 我辜负了你 |
| [20:07] | I tried to stop Wil Wheaton being Professor Proton, | 我试过阻止威尔·惠顿出演质子教授 |
| [20:10] | but I couldn’t. | 但我没能做到 |
| [20:12] | See, now, that’s-that’s the kind of thing | 知道吗 这种事情 |
| [20:14] | you could tell a fella over a… | 很适合边吃熏牛肉三明治 |
| [20:19] | pastrami sandwich. | 边告诉对方的 |
| [20:25] | Well, don’t worry. | 别担心 |
| [20:27] | He’s now on my enemies list forever. | 现在他会永远在我的仇家名单里 |
| [20:29] | He’s totally cut off. | 我跟他永世绝交 |
| [20:31] | Interesting. | 有意思 |
| [20:33] | Can-can anyone sign-sign up for that list? | 其他人能去哪登记上那份名单呢 |