| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Hey, can you help me put some of the food out? | 能帮忙把食物摆出来吗 |
| [00:05] | Yeah. Let me finish packing this stuff up. | 好 我收拾完这些就帮你 |
| [00:07] | You know how Sheldon is if he sees Christmas stuff | 你也不是不知道谢尔顿在元旦后看到 |
| [00:09] | lying around after New Year’s. | 圣诞节摆饰还在会有啥反应 |
| [00:10] | Yeah, but he doesn’t live here anymore. | 可是他都不住这里了 |
| [00:12] | Well, he doesn’t live at Walmart, but he still threw | 他也不住商场啊 可是他还是会 |
| [00:14] | a tantrum when he saw Marshmallow Peeps after Easter. | 因为复活节后店里还卖复活节糖果而暴怒 |
| [00:19] | And that’s the same man who complains | 而正是这位仁兄也抱怨过 |
| [00:20] | you can’t find Marshmallow Peeps after Easter. | 复活节后买不到复活节糖呢 |
| [00:25] | Oh. It’s Bernadette. She says they’re running late. | 伯纳黛特说他们会晚到一会 |
| [00:28] | “The baby threw up on Howard, | “宝宝吐在了霍华德身上 |
| [00:29] | and then Howard threw up on Howard.” | 接着霍华德也吐到了霍华德身上” |
| [00:33] | Well, he didn’t throw up on the baby. That’s a win. | 至少他没吐到宝宝身上 不幸中大幸啊 |
| [00:36] | – Hello. – Hi. | -你们好 -好啊 |
| [00:37] | Hi! Welcome back. How was Texas? | 欢迎回来 德州老家如何啊 |
| [00:40] | Oh, you know. The Lone Star state. | 也就是那样 德州德州孤星之州 |
| [00:42] | That should be its Yelp rating. | 这个州在点评网也只值一颗孤星 |
| [00:45] | It was not a great trip. | 不是一趟太高兴的旅程 |
| [00:47] | Well, you’re home now. | 现在回家就好啦 |
| [00:48] | Yeah. It is good to be home. | 对啊 回到家太开心了 |
| [00:49] | I… Oh, good Lord! Is that mistletoe? | 我的老天 那是榭寄生吗 |
| [00:52] | Don’t you maniacs own a calendar? | 你们这些疯子家里没日历吗 |
| [00:55] | I told him to take it down. He would not listen to me. | 我叫他收起来了 他就是不听我的话 |
| [01:26] | Did you at least have a good flight down there? | 你们的飞行旅途还算愉快吧 |
| [01:27] | It was fine. | 挺好的 |
| [01:28] | Other than the weird-tasting juice Amy gave me. | 除了艾米给我的那杯味道怪怪的果汁 |
| [01:31] | I slept the whole way. | 我一路都在睡觉 |
| [01:34] | So, what happened in Texas that was so bad? | 所以是在德州发生了什么惨事 |
| [01:36] | And before our next drive to Comic-Con, | 在我们下次开车去漫展之前 |
| [01:38] | I need the name of that juice. | 你记得告诉我那果汁叫什么 |
| [01:41] | Well, we were on our way to my mother’s house… | 当时我们正在去我妈妈家的路上 |
| [01:47] | How did we get in the car? | 我们是怎么上的车 |
| [01:50] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [01:52] | How did you get him in the car? | 对啊 你是怎么把他弄上车的 |
| [01:54] | I rented one of those carts, | 我租了台推车 |
| [01:56] | pushed him toward the open door | 车门打开 把他推进去 |
| [01:57] | and just let inertia take care of the rest. | 剩下的就交给惯性了 |
| [02:04] | So, while we’re at your mother’s house, | 我们去拜访你妈妈的时候 |
| [02:05] | it might be a good time to tell her that we’re living together. | 正好可以顺便告诉她 我们同居了 |
| [02:09] | Do we have to? | 有这必要吗 |
| [02:11] | I really don’t want to hear the religious lecture. | 我实在不想听她那套基督教大道理 |
| [02:14] | Maybe there won’t be one. | 或许她不会说你呢 |
| [02:16] | There’s always one. | 肯定会有的 |
| [02:18] | She gave it to my sister about her boyfriend, | 我姐交男朋友的时候 她就说了 |
| [02:21] | my brother about his girlfriend, | 我哥交女朋友时也说了 |
| [02:23] | my father about his girlfriend. | 我爸交女朋友时也说了 |
| [02:27] | That one had some un-Christian words in it. | 她说我爸那次还骂了基督教徒不太该说的字眼 |
| [02:31] | Well, she likes me. | 她挺喜欢我的 |
| [02:32] | You know, there’s a chance she might be okay with it. | 有可能她对此不会有意见呢 |
| [02:35] | Eh, I don’t know. | 这很难说 |
| [02:36] | I am her precious little boy. | 毕竟我是她的宝贝儿子 |
| [02:39] | And you did take my flower. | 而你摘了人家的花蕊 |
| [02:45] | Do boys have flowers? | 男生也有”花蕊”吗 |
| [02:49] | Who knows what he has down there. | 谁知道他底下是啥构造啊 |
| [02:52] | Anyway… | 到家后… |
| [02:54] | Thank you, God, for the food we are about to receive | 感谢主 赐给我们桌上的美食 |
| [02:57] | and for the nourishment of our bodies | 食物给我们身体补充营养 |
| [02:58] | and bless the hands that prepared it. | 保佑准备这些食物的人 |
| [03:01] | Amen. | 阿门 |
| [03:03] | Given that your hands prepared it, | 准备这些食物的人是你 |
| [03:05] | isn’t that a little self-serving? | 你这么祷告是不是有些假公济私 |
| [03:08] | You start changing the words to the prayers, | 一开始是乱改祷告词 |
| [03:10] | next thing you know, you’re in a church with a guitar. | 很快你就会抱着吉他去教堂 把祷告词随便唱出来 |
| [03:16] | Thank you for cooking, it looks delicious. | 谢谢您做饭 看起来很好吃 |
| [03:18] | Oh, it’s my pleasure. Mm. | 给大家做饭是我的荣幸 |
| [03:20] | I’m so glad y’all could make it. | 我很高兴你们能来 |
| [03:22] | So, tell me, what’s going on back home? | 跟我说说 你们在纽约最近怎么样 |
| [03:24] | Well, uh, Howard and Bernadette had their baby. | 霍华德跟伯纳黛特刚喜获千金 |
| [03:27] | Oh, that’s wonderful! | 太好了 |
| [03:29] | Now, have they decided to raise it Jewish or regular? | 他们是要按犹太习俗 还是正常的基督教习俗养啊 |
| [03:38] | Welcome to Texas. | 欢迎来到德州 |
| [03:42] | They haven’t said. | 他们还没决定呢 |
| [03:44] | Anyway, we, uh, we also have some exciting news to share. | 其实呢 我们自己也有点好消息分享 |
| [03:49] | Oh, wait, wait… I… Shouldn’t we just eat? | 等等 等等 我们乖乖安静吃饭吧 |
| [03:51] | You know, I mean, God did take time out of his busy schedule | 毕竟主可是从他忙碌的日程里抽空 |
| [03:53] | to bless these Sloppy Joes. | 祝福了这些邋遢乔汉堡呢 |
| [03:55] | Come on, Shelly, tell me your news. | 说啊 谢利 发生什么事了 |
| [03:58] | All right. This is on you. | 好吧 出事了就怪你 |
| [04:02] | Amy and I are living together in sin, | 我跟艾米充满罪孽地婚前同居了 |
| [04:05] | like a couple of New Yorkers. | 就像纽约人那样 |
| [04:08] | Now, while you scold us, I’m going to get a knife and a fork. | 你训斥我们时 容我去拿一套刀叉 |
| [04:12] | Joe may be sloppy, but Sheldon’s not. | 乔可以邋遢 但谢尔顿不能邋遢 |
| [04:16] | Well, thank you for letting me know, | 谢谢你告诉我这事 |
| [04:18] | and I, for one, am thrilled. | 但我感到十分高兴 |
| [04:23] | What? | 什么 |
| [04:25] | What… Where’s the judgment? | 你不是该先入为主批评我们吗 |
| [04:27] | W-Where’s the fire and brimstone? | 炼狱之火那套说辞呢 |
| [04:30] | Where’s the part where you tell us we’re going to Hell | 还有你说我们会下地狱受折磨 |
| [04:32] | and I say have you seen the size of the bugs outside? | 然后我说你看看外面虫子的大小 |
| [04:34] | We’re already there! | 我们早就在地狱了 |
| [04:36] | Obviously, I would prefer | 的确 我是会比较希望 |
| [04:38] | if you weren’t living out of wedlock, | 你们婚前不要先同居 |
| [04:39] | but given your special circumstances, | 但考虑到你情况特殊 |
| [04:41] | I’m very happy for you. | 我对此甚是喜闻乐见 |
| [04:46] | And what “special circumstances” are those? | 你说的”特殊情况”是指什么 |
| [04:50] | Oh, boy, I think it’s about to get bad. | 妈啊 好戏马上就要上演啦 |
| [04:55] | Shelly, how do I put this? | 谢利 我该怎么跟你说呢 |
| [04:57] | By your third birthday, you had memorized | 你三岁就能记住 |
| [05:00] | over a thousand different kinds of trains, | 超过一千种不同的火车了 |
| [05:03] | and I never imagined | 而我从来没想到 |
| [05:05] | a woman getting aboard any of them. | 会有女人愿意”上”你这趟车 |
| [05:13] | What, so… You thought I was going to be alone | 什么 所以 你一直认为 |
| [05:15] | for the rest of my life? | 我会孤独终老吗 |
| [05:17] | No! Just for the middle part. | 不 孤独大半辈子而已 |
| [05:20] | ‘Cause at the end I assumed there’d be nurses. | 因为等你老了 会有护士来照顾你 |
| [05:25] | Well, this is highly insulting. | 这也太侮辱人了 |
| [05:27] | Sheldon, don’t overreact. | 谢尔顿 别小题大做 |
| [05:29] | I’m the child she was worried about? | 她最担心的孩子居然是我 |
| [05:31] | I have a brother and sister | 我有一个哥哥和一个姐姐 |
| [05:32] | whose combined intellectual wattage | 那两个人的智商瓦数加起来 |
| [05:34] | couldn’t power a potato clock, | 都不够给玩具土豆钟供电 |
| [05:34] | 一种科学实验玩具钟 把土豆变成电池般为电子钟供电 | |
| [05:36] | if I spotted them the potato. | 而且还得是我帮他们指出土豆在哪 |
| [05:41] | Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. | 叽里咕噜噼里啪啦 |
| [05:43] | Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. | 叽里咕噜噼里啪啦 |
| [05:46] | What? | 什么 |
| [05:47] | Well, I was in my room, | 当时我进房间了 |
| [05:48] | I couldn’t hear what they were saying. | 听不见她们说了些什么 |
| [05:53] | I’ll take over from here. | 接下来我来说 |
| [05:55] | He’s been in there a long time. | 他躲房间里很久了 |
| [05:59] | Should I go talk to him? | 我该去和他谈谈吗 |
| [06:00] | He’s upset with me. I should be the one who talks to him. | 他是生我的气 应该是我去和他谈 |
| [06:07] | Are you going to? | 你准备去吗 |
| [06:09] | Oh, heck no. | 门都没有 |
| [06:25] | Sheldon, what… what are you doing? | 谢尔顿 你这是干什么 |
| [06:29] | Just being the un-socialized eccentric | 做一个不适应社会的怪胎 |
| [06:31] | my mother always thought I was. | 反正我妈一直是这么看我的 |
| [06:35] | You startin’ to see why I didn’t go in there? | 现在你明白我为什么不去和他谈了吧 |
| [06:39] | Sheldon, if you’re trying to prove me wrong, | 谢尔顿 如果你想证明我是错的 |
| [06:40] | the tighty-whities on your head ain’t changing my mind. | 你头上的白色三角裤可不会让我改变看法 |
| [06:45] | We’re ignoring the fins… Okay. | 我们就这么无视脚蹼了 好吧 |
| [06:48] | Yeah. And I don’t understand why you’re taking her side. | 而且我不明白你为什么站在她那边 |
| [06:51] | By being my girlfriend, | 你是我女朋友 |
| [06:52] | she’s saying you’re a weirdo, too. | 那表示她也觉得你是个怪胎 |
| [06:54] | I don’t think that’s what she’s saying. | 我觉得你妈不是那个意思 |
| [06:56] | And…? | 然后呢 |
| [06:57] | That’s exactly what she was saying. | 他妈就是那个意思 |
| [07:01] | Can you believe my mother thinks we’re both strange? | 你能相信吗 我妈居然认为我们都是怪胎 |
| [07:04] | Absolutely not! | 简直难以置信 |
| [07:06] | That’s… too loud. | 声音太大太心虚了 |
| [07:07] | Absolutely not. | 简直难以置信 |
| [07:10] | Well, after that, Sheldon and I | 闹了那么一出 谢尔顿和我 |
| [07:12] | got out of the house for a while. | 出门待了一阵子 |
| [07:13] | Well, first we buttered my feet to get the swim fins off, | 我们先往我脚上涂了黄油 把脚蹼拿下来 |
| [07:15] | and then we went out. | 然后再出门 |
| [07:19] | You know, I’m sorry your mother made you feel bad. | 你妈让你难过了我很遗憾 |
| [07:21] | But, you know, at the end of the day, she was wrong, | 但归根结底 她错了 |
| [07:23] | because you’re not alone. | 因为你没有孤独一生 |
| [07:27] | You’re right. | 你说得对 |
| [07:28] | I have Leonard and Howard and Raj, | 我有莱纳德 霍华德 拉杰 |
| [07:31] | Stuart, Penny, | 斯图尔特 佩妮 |
| [07:33] | Leonard’s mom, Bernadette, Wil Wheaton… | 莱纳德他妈 伯纳黛特 威尔·惠顿 |
| [07:36] | What about the woman who just buttered your big flat feet? | 刚往你的大宽脚上涂黄油的女人排在哪 |
| [07:41] | I was going chronologically. | 我是按认识的时间顺序说的 |
| [07:43] | You’re right between Koothrappali’s father | 你在库萨帕里他爸 |
| [07:45] | and Omar, the one-eyed Sparkletts guy. | 和独眼龙瓶装水男奥马尔之间 |
| [07:48] | Well, let’s try to not let it ruin the rest of our trip. | 别让这件事把咱们接下来的行程也毁了 |
| [07:51] | I knew we should’ve never mentioned | 我就知道我们从一开始 |
| [07:52] | us living together in the first place. | 就不该把同居这件事告诉她 |
| [07:55] | She was gonna find out eventually. | 她早晚会发现的 |
| [07:57] | Disagree. | 我不这么认为 |
| [07:58] | We’ve known about evolution since 1859. | 人类1859年就知道进化论了 |
| [08:00] | She still believes in Noah and his amazing zoo boat. | 她至今还相信诺亚和他的神奇动物园破船 |
| [08:05] | This could have all been avoided | 如果你当时听我的话 |
| [08:06] | if you’d only listened to me. | 事情就不会变成这样了 |
| [08:10] | Sheldon, | 谢尔顿 |
| [08:11] | I knew your mother was fine with us living together | 我知道你妈不会介意咱俩同居 |
| [08:13] | because I already told her we were. | 因为我早就告诉她了 |
| [08:18] | Why would you do that? | 你为什么会那么做 |
| [08:19] | This was a potential issue, | 因为这是颗定时炸弹 |
| [08:21] | so I got out ahead of it | 所以我提前下手解除 |
| [08:23] | and I managed the situation for you. | 帮你把问题处理掉了 |
| [08:27] | You “managed the situation.” | 你”帮我把问题处理掉了” |
| [08:29] | That’s right. | 没错 |
| [08:30] | So my mother thought I was incapable of finding a mate, | 所以我妈认为我没能力找到伴侣 |
| [08:33] | and my mate thinks I’m incapable of running my own life. | 而我的伴侣认为我没能力掌控我自己的生活 |
| [08:37] | Not your whole life! | 不是全部生活都不行 |
| [08:38] | I mean, science. You got that. | 科学那部分你没问题 |
| [08:40] | Organizing your sock drawer, you’re the king. | 整理装袜子的抽屉 你世界第一 |
| [08:44] | But understanding how other people are feeling, | 但理解他人感受这部分 |
| [08:47] | that’s a weak spot for you. | 这是你的弱点 |
| [08:49] | I have gotten much better at that. | 在这点上我已经进步很多了 |
| [08:51] | Have you? How am I feeling right now? | 是吗 那我现在是什么感觉 |
| [08:53] | What the… How should I know? | 什么 我上哪猜去啊 |
| [08:58] | Excited? Itchy? Give me the first letter. | 兴奋 痒痒 好歹把第一个字告诉我 |
| [09:02] | You and I are in a relationship. | 你和我是情侣 |
| [09:04] | I help you with your shortcomings, | 你不足的地方我帮你补足 |
| [09:05] | and you help me with mine. | 我不足的地方你帮我补足 |
| [09:07] | How would you feel if I contacted | 如果我背着你联系你老妈 |
| [09:09] | your mother behind your back? | 你会是什么感觉 |
| [09:11] | Delighted that you showed any interest in my family at all? | 高兴啊 想不到你居然对我家人感兴趣 |
| [09:15] | “Delighted”? | “高兴” |
| [09:16] | What… not if I guessed for a hundred years. | 我猜一百年也猜不着啊 |
| [09:22] | – Hi. – Hey, guys. | -大伙 -我们来了 |
| [09:23] | Hi. There’s the little family! | 幸福小家庭到了 |
| [09:25] | – Hello. – Hello. | -大家好 -大家好 |
| [09:29] | And their Sherpas. | 还有他们的夏尔巴仆人 |
| [09:32] | The baby’s asleep, | 宝宝睡着了 |
| [09:33] | can we put her in your room? | 我们把她放到你们房间里行吗 |
| [09:34] | – Yeah. Go ahead. – Do you need help? | -当然 去吧 -需要帮忙吗 |
| [09:35] | No. I got it. | 不用 我自己来 |
| [09:38] | Doubtfire, Poppins, follow me. | 窈窕奶爸 飞天保姆 跟我来 |
| [09:42] | Sorry we’re late. | 抱歉来晚了 |
| [09:44] | Oh, it’s no problem, Amy and Sheldon were just telling us | 没关系 艾米和谢尔顿正在说 |
| [09:46] | about their trip to Texas. | 他们去德州的事 |
| [09:47] | Yeah. Here. | 没关系 |
| [09:48] | I’ll catch you up. | 我粗略地给你们讲一遍 |
| [09:51] | How did we get in the car? | 我们是怎么上的车 |
| [09:52] | Stop. | 打住 |
| [09:55] | Okay. They told Mary they were living together, | 他们把同居的事告诉了玛丽 |
| [09:57] | there was a fight, he got his feelings hurt, | 一阵唇枪舌战后 谢尔顿心灵很受伤 |
| [09:59] | then he put underwear on his head… | 于是他把内裤套在了头上 |
| [10:00] | On purpose, | 他自己故意套的 |
| [10:01] | not the way it used to happen in high school. | 而不是像高中时那样被恶霸故意套上 |
| [10:06] | I was acting odd intentionally. | 我是故意表现怪异 |
| [10:08] | Really? So you can control it? | 真的吗 所以你可以控制你的怪异程度吗 |
| [10:13] | Okay. Then what happened? | 好了 接下来发生了什么 |
| [10:15] | Well, there’s really not much left to tell. | 接下来就没什么了 |
| [10:17] | I decided that my mother views me as a child | 我觉得我妈一直把我当小孩子看 |
| [10:19] | because I never went through a rebellious phase, | 是因为我从来没经历过青春叛逆期 |
| [10:22] | so, I got an earring. | 于是我去打了耳洞 |
| [10:28] | My mother made me take it out. | 我妈非逼着我把耳环取下来 |
| [10:33] | Amy put alcohol on it. | 艾米用酒精帮我消了毒 |
| [10:39] | And here we are. | 就是这样 |
| [10:41] | What did we miss? | 我们错过了什么精彩好戏 |
| [10:43] | I couldn’t explain it if I tried. | 我就算想解释也解释不清 |
| [10:50] | So tell me, how did Sheldon look with an earring? | 告诉我 谢尔顿戴耳环好看吗 |
| [10:53] | Like the pirate who helps the other pirates connect to the internet? | 就像一个会帮同伴接网线的宅男海盗一样 |
| [10:59] | So what did you and Leonard do? | 你和莱纳德做了些什么 |
| [11:01] | Actually, we got in a pretty nasty fight. | 老实说 我们俩也是吵得不可开交 |
| [11:03] | It might’ve been the worst one we’ve ever had. | 可能是有史以来吵得最厉害的一次 |
| [11:05] | Oh, my God, what happened? | 天啊 到底是怎么了 |
| [11:06] | Well, we had started binge-watching Luke Cage together, | 我俩疯狂迷上了看《卢克·凯奇》这部剧 |
| [11:10] | and it was kind of our thing, and then, | 就像是我俩的专属节目 |
| [11:12] | I find out that she watched two episodes without me. | 结果我发现她背着我多看了两集 |
| [11:17] | It’s like I was excited for a present and got socks. | 感觉就像我期盼已久的圣诞礼物居然只是袜子 |
| [11:22] | I don’t understand how that turns into | 我不明白这怎么会导致 |
| [11:24] | the worst fight of your life. | 你们俩吵了史上最厉害的一次 |
| [11:25] | I don’t understand what’s wrong with socks. | 我不明白袜子有什么不好的 |
| [11:28] | To be fair, we may have been on edge | 老实说 我们之前因为圣诞树 |
| [11:30] | because of the Christmas tree. | 就处于爆发的边缘了 |
| [11:32] | What happened with the tree? | 圣诞树又怎么了 |
| [11:39] | You do make a cute elf. | 你扮小精灵还挺可爱的 |
| [11:41] | Oh, yeah? | 是吗 |
| [11:42] | And you thought Spock ears were only good for Comic-Con. | 你还说斯波克的耳朵只适合参加动漫展呢 |
| [11:46] | Hey, hey, I just found a farm | 我找到了一个农场 |
| [11:47] | where they let you chop down your own tree. | 允许顾客自己砍圣诞树 |
| [11:50] | Oh cool, I’ll be like a pointy-eared Paul Bunyan. | 那我就会像是尖耳朵的大力士保罗·班扬 |
| [12:02] | Stupid idea. | 这个主意太蠢了 |
| [12:05] | No, what’s stupid is a physicist | 真正蠢的是一名物理学家 |
| [12:07] | who doesn’t understand when you swing an axe | 居然不知道在挥斧头的时候 |
| [12:09] | you don’t let go. | 你不能放手 |
| [12:13] | For the tenth time, my mittens were slippery! | 我第十次澄清 我的连指手套打滑了 |
| [12:17] | It’s 70 degrees, you didn’t need mittens. | 外面有21度 你不需要戴连指手套 |
| [12:20] | You know how easily I blister. | 你明知道我很容易起水泡 |
| [12:24] | Yes, yes, you bruise, you peel. | 是是是 怕撞又容易破皮 |
| [12:25] | It’s like I’m married to an old piece of fruit. | 感觉就像嫁给了一颗老水果 |
| [12:29] | Look, we could keep fighting and let it ruin our night, | 我们可以继续吵架 整晚都别想好 |
| [12:32] | or-or we can stop and try to salvage the evening. | 也可以停止争吵 试着挽救今晚 |
| [12:35] | – Fine. – Thank you. | -好吧 -谢谢合作 |
| [12:44] | Leonard? | 莱纳德 |
| [12:45] | Yeah. | 怎么了 |
| [12:46] | There’s something on the windshield. | 挡风玻璃上有东西 |
| [12:57] | You need a break? | 需要休息一下吗 |
| [12:59] | Do not need a break. | 我不需要休息 |
| [13:01] | There’s no shame in asking for a break. | 想休息就说 没啥丢脸的 |
| [13:03] | If I need a break, I’ll ask for a break! | 我想休息了我就会说 |
| [13:07] | Leonard? | 莱纳德 |
| [13:08] | Yeah? | 怎么了 |
| [13:13] | There’s a tree on you. | 你身上有棵树 |
| [13:25] | You want to decorate it tonight? | 你想今晚来装饰它吗 |
| [13:26] | Yeah, with gasoline and a match? Sure. | 用汽油加火柴吗 当然好 |
| [13:43] | I hope it kills us both. | 我希望那生物把我们杀了 |
| [13:47] | By the way, if anyone asks, | 对了 如果以后有人问起 |
| [13:48] | the elevator shaft always had a tree in it. | 电梯间里从很久以前就一直有棵树 |
| [13:53] | So Bernadette, if I express interest in your baby | 伯纳黛特 如果我表达出对你的孩子有兴趣 |
| [13:57] | will you promise not to make me touch it? | 你能发誓不逼我摸她吗 |
| [14:01] | Sure. | 好的 |
| [14:02] | Hey, how’s life with your baby? | 跟宝宝的生活还好吗 |
| [14:05] | Really? You’re never gonna touch their baby? | 不是吧 你打算以后都不碰他们宝宝吗 |
| [14:08] | To this day I’ve never touched Stuart. | 我至今还从没碰过斯图尔特 |
| [14:15] | It’s been wonderful, Sheldon, thanks for asking. | 很好很愉快 谢尔顿 谢谢关心 |
| [14:20] | Oh, please stop crying, I’m begging you! | 别哭了 我求你了 |
| [14:23] | I don’t know what else to do! | 我不知道还有什么招了 |
| [14:25] | My boobs are empty. Do you want lasagna? | 我的奶水都没了 你要吃千层面吗 |
| [14:31] | Shh, shh, shh, it’s okay, it’s okay. | 嘘 嘘 好啦 好啦 |
| [14:42] | What have we done? | 我们犯了大错啊 |
| [14:46] | Hey, I found superhero baby wipes, | 我找到超级英雄婴儿湿巾啦 |
| [14:50] | the perfect way to clean up crime… | 能完美收拾坏人 |
| [14:53] | and tushies. | 以及宝宝屁屁 |
| [14:57] | It took me two hours to get her down. | 我花了两个小时才把她哄睡 |
| [15:00] | Oh, you-you relax, I’ll take this shift. | 你歇着 这回我来 |
| [15:04] | You know, in India when my baby brother cried like that, | 在印度的时候 我小弟一哭成这德行 |
| [15:07] | the servants would just take him far away | 仆人们就会把他带到很远的地方去 |
| [15:09] | so we couldn’t hear it. | 这样我们就听不见了 |
| [15:13] | Not always, sometimes we’d leave. | 不总是这样 有时候是我们走远 |
| [15:19] | Hey, he got her to stop. | 他把孩子哄好了 |
| [15:22] | That was so fast. | 真够快的 |
| [15:23] | Oh, he’s really good with her. | 他真会哄这孩子 |
| [15:25] | Yeah, he has a gift. | 对 他有天赋 |
| [15:30] | What’s the matter? | 怎么啦 |
| [15:32] | Nothing, these are happy tears. | 没事 这是喜极而泣 |
| [15:35] | Oh, good. | 那就好 |
| [15:36] | No they’re not, you bozo! | 才不是 你个蠢货 |
| [15:41] | How come Stuart can get her to stop crying, but I can’t? | 凭啥斯图尔特就能让她不哭 我却不行 |
| [15:45] | I mean, it’s Stuart. | 那可是斯图尔特啊 |
| [15:47] | Maybe she’s playing possum until he goes away. | 也许她是装死 好让他走开 |
| [15:53] | Not funny. | 不好笑 |
| [15:54] | She’s tired, that was funny. | 她只是太累了 你说得很好笑 |
| [15:59] | Everyone’s a better mom than me. | 大家都比我这个妈妈称职 |
| [16:02] | Oh, don’t take it so personally, | 别总把错往身上揽 |
| [16:04] | maybe your baby’s just a jerk. | 也许只是你家孩子特别熊呢 |
| [16:13] | Wait, so how does the story end? | 后来怎么了 |
| [16:14] | Is the baby a jerk | 到底是因为你家孩子熊 |
| [16:16] | or is Bernadette a bad mother? | 还是因为伯纳黛特不是个称职的妈 |
| [16:20] | – Sheldon! – W-What? | -谢尔顿 -怎么了 |
| [16:21] | Is there another twist coming? | 剧情还有反转吗 |
| [16:23] | Is the baby not theirs at all? | 难道说孩子根本不是他们的 |
| [16:26] | Ignore him. | 别搭理他 |
| [16:27] | How did you get the baby to stop crying? | 你怎么让孩子不哭的 |
| [16:30] | Oh, I just talked to her. | 就是跟她聊天 |
| [16:33] | I’ve been told the sound of my voice puts people to sleep. | 有人跟我说 一听我说话就想睡觉 |
| [16:41] | You poor things, you must be exhausted. | 你这可怜的人儿 肯定累坏了 |
| [16:44] | It has been hard to sleep with all the crying. | 哭得太凶了 确实睡不好 |
| [16:54] | How can she hate me? | 她怎么能恨我 |
| [16:55] | I make her food in my chest! | 我可是用胸部在哺育她 |
| [17:00] | It’s like hating a frozen yogurt machine. | 简直跟恨冻酸奶机一样嘛 |
| [17:06] | She doesn’t hate you, stop saying that. | 她并不恨你 别这么说了 |
| [17:08] | Now you hate me too! | 现在连你也恨我了 |
| [17:12] | Shh, I don’t hate you. | 我不恨你 |
| [17:27] | It says here that up to 80% of new mothers | 网上说 高达八成的产妇 |
| [17:31] | experience baby blues. | 都患过产后抑郁症 |
| [17:33] | And that the best thing to do | 最好的办法就是 |
| [17:34] | is reassure them that they’re doing a good job. | 让她们相信 她们做得很好 |
| [17:37] | Bernadette, | 伯纳黛特 |
| [17:38] | you are doing a good job. | 你做得很棒了 |
| [17:43] | Thank you, Sheldon, I’m feeling better now. | 谢谢你 谢尔顿 我现在感觉好点了 |
| [17:46] | Thank you, Internet. | 你该谢的是互联网 |
| [17:47] | I’m telling you, with the right YouTube video, | 我就跟你说 只要找对了视频 |
| [17:49] | I can give Howard a vasectomy. | 我都可以给霍华德做绝育 |
| [17:54] | So things started to turn around? | 后来情况有好转吗 |
| [17:56] | Yeah, eventually I figured out how to get the baby to sleep. | 有 最后我终于知道怎么让孩子睡觉了 |
| [18:00] | Please tell me you didn’t use Amy’s magic juice. | 别跟我说你是用艾米的神奇果汁 |
| [18:11] | Bernie? | 妮妮 |
| [18:13] | She’s asleep. | 她睡着了 |
| [18:14] | Great. | 太好了 |
| [18:17] | And where are you? | 可你在哪啊 |
| [18:20] | Down here. | 下面 |
| [18:34] | This is new. | 新招啊 |
| [18:36] | I didn’t know what else to do. | 我不知道该怎么办了 |
| [18:38] | It worked. | 但成功了 |
| [18:40] | Well, I’d say that’s thinking outside the box, | 我想说 这真是不按套路走的想法 |
| [18:43] | but… come on. | 但…你都套进去了 |
| [18:47] | Don’t make me laugh. | 别让我笑出来 |
| [18:53] | Do you need help getting out? | 需要我扶你出来吗 |
| [18:55] | I think I live here now. | 以后我就住这了 |
| [18:59] | It’s fine. | 挺好的 |
| [19:01] | Is it okay if I get some sleep? | 我去睡会觉行吗 |
| [19:03] | Yeah, go ahead. | 行 去吧 |
| [19:09] | Good job, Mommy. | 干得好 妈咪 |
| [19:12] | I’m proud of you. | 我为你骄傲 |
| [19:15] | Don’t make me cry, either. | 也不要让我哭 |
| [19:18] | Good night. | 晚安 |
| [19:20] | I love both my girls. | 我爱你们 |
| [19:22] | We love you, too. | 我们也爱你 |
| [19:30] | I can’t believe you fit in the crib. | 真不敢相信你能躺进婴儿摇篮 |
| [19:32] | I could take a bath in the sink. | 我还能用洗手池泡澡呢 |
| [19:37] | I don’t, but I can. | 我不做 但是我做得到 |
| [19:40] | So how were your holidays? | 你假期过得怎么样 |
| [19:42] | Oh, thank you for asking. | 多谢关心 |
| [19:44] | Uh, I, uh, went to visit my grandmother. | 我去看了我奶奶 |
| [19:47] | She’s in Bakersfield. | 她住在贝克斯菲尔德 |
| [19:49] | Uh, usually my brother and sister go… | 通常是我兄弟姐妹去 |
| [19:55] | Oh, come on! | 要不要这样 |
| [20:02] | That was fun, thank you. | 玩得很开心 谢谢你们 |
| [20:03] | Yeah, thanks. | 对 谢谢 |
| [20:04] | – Our pleasure. – See you guys at work. | -小事一桩 -上班见了 大伙们 |
| [20:05] | Be there bright and early. | 早早儿地到啊 |
| [20:07] | Not me, paternity leave. | 我不去 放产假 |
| [20:09] | A small human wreaks havoc on his wife’s genitals | 一个小婴儿让他老婆的生殖器受苦受难 |
| [20:11] | and he gets time off. | 而他居然能休假 |
| [20:14] | With pay, sucka! | 还是带薪的哦 废柴 |
| [20:21] | Forgot the baby, still new to this. | 差点忘了宝宝 新手上路 |