| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:07] | T minus 60 seconds | 发射倒数60秒[太空倒数用语] |
| [00:09] | Oh, it all comes down to this! | 终于到了这关键一刻 |
| [00:11] | Oh, I’ve got butterflies. | 我紧张到胃酸要逆流成河了 |
| [00:13] | Don’t get soft on me, Hofstadter. | 别在这时候掉链子 霍夫斯塔德 |
| [00:15] | I will slap those glasses right off your face. | 小心爷一掌把你脸上的眼镜都打飞 |
| [00:20] | What’s going on? | 你们这是干嘛 |
| [00:21] | Hey. We’re about to buy tickets for Comic-Con. | 我们要抢动漫展的票 |
| [00:25] | T Minus 45 seconds! | 发射倒数45秒 |
| [00:27] | They sell out incredibly fast, | 票总是被秒速抢光 |
| [00:28] | but as long as one of us gets in, we can buy passes… | 但只要一人挤进 大家就都能… |
| [00:29] | Good Lord, this is not the time for flirting! | 我的天啊 现在不是调情的时候 |
| [00:31] | Keep it in your pants! | 别淫虫上脑了好吗 |
| [00:34] | It’s a whole lot of weird before coffee. | 喝上咖啡前就有这种怪事 |
| [00:37] | T-minus 30 seconds! | 发射倒数30秒 |
| [00:39] | Oh, I have to go to the bathroom so bad. | 我真的忍不住要去嘘嘘了 |
| [00:41] | Every year! I told you, wear a diaper! | 每年我都叫你穿上尿布 |
| [00:43] | And I told you I get diaper rash! | 我也早说了我会起尿布疹 |
| [00:45] | 15 seconds! | 15秒 |
| [00:46] | Oh, this is it! | 关键时刻来了 |
| [00:48] | This is it! | 成败就此一举 |
| [00:52] | This is it. | 要来啦 |
| [00:54] | Five, four, three, | 倒数5 4 3 |
| [00:56] | – two, one. – It’s live. | -2 1 -开卖啦 |
| [00:58] | Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! | 快点 快点 快点 |
| [01:06] | Anyone in?! | 有人挤进了吗 |
| [01:07] | – No! – Not yet! | -没 -还没 |
| [01:10] | Do not stop refreshing your screens! | 记得一直按F5刷新页面 |
| [01:12] | – Refresh. – Refresh. | -刷 -刷 |
| [01:14] | Refresh. | 我刷 |
| [01:15] | Refresh. Refresh. | 我刷 我再刷 |
| [01:16] | Refresh. Refresh. Refresh… | 我刷 我刷 我刷刷 |
| [01:19] | Yeah, this is not gonna be enough coffee. | 要忍这帮怪人 这么小杯咖啡一定不够啊 |
| [01:22] | Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. | 我刷 我刷 我刷刷 |
| [01:50] | Refresh… Refresh… Refresh… | 我刷 我刷 我刷刷 |
| [01:53] | Refresh… Refresh… | 我刷 我再刷 |
| [01:55] | Refresh. Refresh. | 我刷 我再刷 |
| [01:57] | Refresh. | 刷刷刷 |
| [01:58] | Refresh. It’s been ten minutes! | 我刷 都过了十分钟了 |
| [02:00] | We’re running out of time. | 快没时间了 |
| [02:01] | To be cool? Yeah. | 耍帅时间吗 是啊 |
| [02:04] | I did it! I did it! I’m in the queue! | 我成功了 我挤进买票队伍里了 |
| [02:08] | And they say firefighters are the real heroes. | 消防员算啥英雄 他才是真英雄 |
| [02:12] | Uh, what number in line are you? | 你购票序号是第几 |
| [02:14] | – Uh, 15… – Great! | -第15 -太好了 |
| [02:15] | – …thousand, 211. – Damn! | -第15211个 -我靠 |
| [02:18] | Oh, they only have Thursday and Sunday passes left. | 只剩下周四跟周日的票了 |
| [02:21] | – Really? – Oh, Thursday’s gone. Just Sunday left. | -是吗 -现在周四也没了 只剩周日的了 |
| [02:23] | Oh, Sunday’s the worst. Everybody’s leaving, | 周日是最差劲的一天了 都没什么人了 |
| [02:27] | most of good panels are over, | 大部分值得看的访谈也都结束了 |
| [02:29] | the only T-shirts left are small and XXXXL | 剩下的主题T恤也只剩小号跟超超超超大号 |
| [02:35] | Sunday’s gone. | 周日的票也没了 |
| [02:36] | Not Sunday! I love Sunday! | 别啊 我超爱周日的 |
| [02:41] | So that’s it? Everything’s sold out? | 所以就这样 票全都卖完了吗 |
| [02:44] | Yeah. | 是的 |
| [02:46] | I can’t believe we’re not going. | 真不敢相信我们去不成了 |
| [02:50] | It’s okay. | 没事的 |
| [02:51] | You know, there-there’s always WonderCon in Anaheim. | 阿纳海姆市也有另一个动漫展啊 |
| [02:56] | That-That’s just as good. | 那个展也还行啊 |
| [02:59] | Excuse me. | 失陪一下 |
| [03:07] | Oh, guys, this is really sad. | 你们真是太可怜了 |
| [03:10] | And in a different way than it was 20 minutes ago. | 而且是有别于20分钟前的那种可怜 |
| [03:16] | I can’t believe we wasted all that time on our Hulk costumes. | 我们浪费大把时间制作绿巨人服装 现在全打水漂了 |
| [03:19] | You were all going as the Hulk? | 你们本来全打算打扮成绿巨人啊 |
| [03:21] | Not the same Hulk. | 不是同一版的绿巨人 |
| [03:23] | Ferrigno, Bana, Norton and Ruffalo. | 77年版 03年版 08年版 复联版 |
| [03:27] | We would have been the angry green belles | 本来我们会是化装舞会上的一群 |
| [03:29] | of the masquerade ball. | 愤怒绿色佳人呢 |
| [03:32] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
| [03:35] | And we’re back to the first kind of sad. | 现在又变回第一种”可怜”了 |
| [03:40] | Gentlemen, I have the solution to our Comic-Con problem. | 先生们 我有方法解决动漫展问题了 |
| [03:45] | We don’t need them. | 忘了那个破展吧 |
| [03:47] | I’m starting my own convention. | 我要自己办一个动漫展 |
| [03:51] | Sheldon, just buy scalped tickets with us. | 谢尔顿 就跟我们一起去买黄牛票嘛 |
| [03:54] | I told you. Buying scalped tickets is against the rules. | 我告诉你 买黄牛票是违反大会规定的 |
| [03:57] | If you get caught, you get banned from Comic-Con for life. | 如被发现 终身不得再参与动漫展 |
| [04:01] | Life, Leonard. | 终身啊 莱纳德 |
| [04:02] | You’re gonna feel pretty silly when we’re 80 years old, | 想想等我们80岁 你载我去参加动漫展 |
| [04:04] | and you have to drive me down there | 可你进不去 得在车上等我三天时 |
| [04:06] | and then wait in the car for three days. | 你就会懊恼自己现在的决定 |
| [04:10] | Do what you want. | 随便你 |
| [04:11] | We’re getting scalped tickets. | 我们要去买黄牛票 |
| [04:12] | Oh, I already found a guy online who’s willing to sell. | 我已经在网上找到一个愿意卖的人了 |
| [04:14] | How do you know this isn’t a sting operation | 你怎么知道这不是动漫展警察 |
| [04:17] | set up by the Comic-Con police? | 布下的钓鱼计划呢 |
| [04:20] | The same way I know | 就跟我知道 |
| [04:21] | that the people in the TV set can’t see me. | 电视机里的人看不到我一样 |
| [04:25] | Sheldon, just come with us. | 谢尔顿 你随大流嘛 |
| [04:26] | You’re not gonna make your own convention. | 你怎么自己搞一个动漫展啊 |
| [04:28] | You know, there was a time | 你们知道曾几何时 |
| [04:29] | when Comic-Con didn’t exist at all | 在世上还没有动漫展之前 |
| [04:31] | until one lone dreamer with a unique vision made it happen. | 也是一位有理想的孤独梦想家打造起来的 |
| [04:35] | And you mark my words– | 你们听好了 |
| [04:37] | I’m gonna rip that guy off. | 我就是要去山寨他 |
| [04:41] | Yes, I’m starting my own comic book convention, | 是的 我要自己打造一个动漫展 |
| [04:45] | and I thought that your client, Robert Downey Jr., | 我觉得你的客户 小罗伯特·唐尼[钢铁侠] |
| [04:48] | would be perfect to appear on our first panel. | 会是我们第一个访谈节目的完美出席嘉宾 |
| [04:53] | Oh, well, now, why are you saying “no”? | 为什么你现在就拒绝了呢 |
| [04:54] | You haven’t even asked him yet. | 你都还没问过他本人意见呢 |
| [04:57] | You know, excuse me, | 不好意思啊 |
| [04:58] | but I sat through Iron Man 2. | 但我当年耐着性子看完了《钢铁侠2》 |
| [05:00] | I believe he owes me two hours of his time. | 他该抽出两个小时的时间 就当还给我 |
| [05:04] | They hung up on me. | 他们居然挂我电话 |
| [05:10] | Did you tell them that you’re holding your convention | 你没有告诉他们 你的动漫展 |
| [05:12] | at a Marie Callender’s, | 是在老牌连锁餐厅举办 |
| [05:12] | Marie Callender 以制作各式各样美味派饼而闻名的餐厅 | |
| [05:13] | and that every panelist gets a free slice of pie? | 每一个受邀嘉宾能获得一块免费的派饼 |
| [05:16] | I didn’t even get to that part. | 我都还没来得及说呢 |
| [05:19] | Look, even your friend Wil Wheaton thinks | 就连你的朋友威尔·惠顿都觉得 |
| [05:21] | this is a waste of time. | 这是在浪费时间 |
| [05:23] | Not true. | 才不是呢 |
| [05:24] | Wil thinks this is a great idea. | 威尔觉得这是个很棒的主意 |
| [05:26] | He was just concerned that | 他只是担心 |
| [05:27] | he wasn’t a big enough celebrity | 自己的名气不够大 |
| [05:29] | to headline such an amazing event. | 无法担任如此重大活动的主打来宾 |
| [05:31] | Also, that’s the same day that he shampoos his beard. | 而且那天他要洗胡子 抽不开身 |
| [05:36] | Sheldon, buddy, I just don’t think | 谢尔顿 兄弟 我真心觉得 |
| [05:37] | this is going to come together for you. | 你名单上的人是请不到的 |
| [05:39] | You don’t know that. | 你懂个屁 |
| [05:40] | I still have plenty of solid leads on this list. | 这名单上还有几个一定会来的人 |
| [05:43] | – Good luck. – No, wait. | -那祝你好运 -先别走 |
| [05:45] | I need you to call Stan Lee, Leonard Nimoy | 我要你帮我打电话给斯坦·李 伦纳德·尼莫伊 |
| [05:48] | and Bill Nye the Science Guy… | 还有《比尔教科学》节目的比尔 |
| [05:50] | ’cause, legally, I’m not allowed to. | 因为从法律上来说 我是禁止接触他们的 |
| [05:53] | Oh, and, also, Carrie Fisher, | 对了 还有凯莉·费雪 |
| [05:53] | 《星球大战》中饰演莱娅公主的女星 后来沉迷毒品和酒精 还一度患上躁郁症 | |
| [05:55] | you know, ’cause I hear she can be pretty nuts. | 因为我听说她是个疯婆子 |
| [06:00] | I can’t believe Leonard is | 我真不敢相信莱纳德 |
| [06:01] | spending hundreds of dollars on scalped tickets. | 居然花好几百块去买一张黄牛票 |
| [06:04] | Last week, you spent that on a little dress. | 上周 你也花这么多钱去买一条小裙子啊 |
| [06:07] | Yeah, but those tickets only get him into Comic-Con. | 但黄牛票只能让动漫展为他敞开大门 |
| [06:09] | That dress gets me into anywhere I want. | 而那裙子能让任何地方为我敞开大门 |
| [06:14] | Those tickets were pretty expensive. | 那些黄牛票的确很贵 |
| [06:16] | I had to give Howie an advance on his allowance. | 我只好让华仔预支他的零用钱 |
| [06:20] | Now he’s never gonna put his toys away. | 这下他一定舍不得放开在动漫展买的玩具 |
| [06:24] | Why can’t they do something sensible like Sheldon | 为什么他们不能像谢尔顿一样明智 |
| [06:26] | and start their own comic book convention? | 举办自己的动漫展呢 |
| [06:29] | Also, who wants to throw me out that window? | 好吧 谁想把我扔出去窗外 |
| [06:34] | Oh, while they’re acting like teenagers, | 当他们表现得像个小屁孩时 |
| [06:35] | we could do something grown-up. | 我们应该做点大人做的事 |
| [06:37] | Oh. You mean like a museum? | 你是说去博物馆吗 |
| [06:39] | Yes, like a museum, but anything else. | 对 就像去博物馆那种 但不是 |
| [06:44] | Oh, I know. There’s a nice hotel not far from here | 我知道这附近有一个不错的酒店 |
| [06:46] | where they do afternoon tea. | 那里可以喝下午茶 |
| [06:48] | Ooh, afternoon tea– how sophisticated of us. | 下午茶 好高端洋气上档次啊 |
| [06:51] | Oh, all right, if we’re gonna be fancy, | 好吧 如果我们要去高档场所 |
| [06:52] | I should probably put on clean underwear. | 那我最好穿上干净的内衣裤 |
| [06:55] | La-dee-da! | 哎哟哟 |
| [06:56] | Look who has clean underwear. | 某人居然还有干净的内衣裤 |
| [06:58] | No, we’re gonna stop at Target on the way. | 我没有 所以路上得去超市一趟 |
| [07:03] | Hey, since Sheldon’s not going to Comic-Con, | 既然谢尔顿不去参加动漫展 |
| [07:05] | maybe we could find a cool trio to dress up as. | 或许我们可以打扮成帅酷三侠 |
| [07:08] | What if we go as The Fantastic Four, | 不如我们打扮成神奇四侠 |
| [07:10] | and just tell people that the Invisible Girl | 就告诉其他人其实隐形女侠 |
| [07:10] | 神奇四侠包括神奇大侠 霹雳侠 石头侠和隐形女侠 | |
| [07:11] | is standing there with us. | 就站在咱们旁边 |
| [07:14] | Oh, and I thought our days of pretending | 我还以为我们假装跟 |
| [07:16] | to be with women who don’t exist were over. | 不存在的女人在一起的日子已经远去 |
| [07:19] | Gentlemen, I am one step away | 各位 我离为我的动漫展 |
| [07:22] | from securing a huge guest for my convention. | 搞到一位重量级来宾 只有一步之遥啦 |
| [07:25] | Does that step include chloroform | 那一步是要用麻醉药把人迷晕 |
| [07:27] | and a roll of duct tape? | 外加五花大绑吗 |
| [07:29] | I don’t think that will be necessary | 我觉得对于詹姆斯·厄尔·琼斯来说 |
| [07:30] | for Mr. James Earl Jones. | 完全不需要这样 |
| [07:33] | You heard me. | 你们听到了吧 |
| [07:34] | The voice of Darth Vader, | 他是《星际大战》中黑武士 |
| [07:35] | the Lion King’s dad, | 和《狮子王》中父王的配音员 |
| [07:37] | and FYI, the guy who says, “This is CNN.” | 那句”这里是美国有线电视新闻网”也是他说的 |
| [07:42] | Which also sounds like Darth Vader. | 当然那声音听起来就像黑武士 |
| [07:47] | How are you gonna get James Earl Jones? | 你怎么能请到詹姆斯·厄尔·琼斯 |
| [07:49] | Simple. Earlier today, he Tweeted | 很简单 今天早些时候 他在微博上写 |
| [07:52] | that he’s looking forward to going to | 他很期待晚上要去 |
| [07:53] | his favorite sushi restaurant for dinner. | 他最爱的寿司店吃晚餐 |
| [07:55] | I Googled an interview from four years ago | 我搜到四年前采访他的报道 |
| [07:58] | which was conducted in his favorite sushi restaurant. | 恰好是在他最爱的寿司店拍摄的 |
| [08:01] | That’s where he’ll be, and that’s where I’m going, | 他要去那里 我也会去那里 |
| [08:04] | – and… – And that’s where Darth Vader’s | -然后 -然后在那里 黑武士 |
| [08:06] | gonna pour soy sauce on your head. | 会把酱油倒在你头上 |
| [08:10] | Sheldon, I don’t care if you get scalped tickets with us or not, | 谢尔顿 你要不要一起买黄牛票我无所谓 |
| [08:12] | but please don’t be creepy and go stalking this poor guy. | 但拜托别像个变态一样跟踪那个可怜的老头 |
| [08:15] | You’re gonna get in trouble. | 你会给自己惹麻烦的 |
| [08:17] | You’re the ones who are going to get in trouble. | 你们才会给自己惹麻烦呢 |
| [08:19] | You’re buying non-transferable tickets. | 你们居然从一个陌生人手里 |
| [08:21] | And from a stranger, no less. | 买不可转让出售的门票 |
| [08:24] | Not only can you get banned from Comic-Con, | 如果被抓到 你们不但会被禁止参加动漫展 |
| [08:26] | if caught, you could be charged with petty theft. | 你们还可能被控告轻微盗窃罪 |
| [08:29] | You think about that while I’m warning James Earl Jones | 当我去警告詹姆斯·厄尔·琼斯在微博 |
| [08:31] | about the danger of posting his location on Twitter. | 泄露自己行踪的危险性时 你们好好反省下 |
| [08:35] | He got lucky this time. | 这次碰到我是他走运 |
| [08:37] | There are some weirdoes out there. | 现在外面很多怪胎跟踪狂呢 |
| [08:40] | 《星际大战》黑武士主题曲 | |
| [08:53] | Forgot my keys. | 忘了拿钥匙了 |
| [09:00] | Okay, great. Bye. | 好的 可以 再见 |
| [09:03] | Our friendly neighborhood scalper | 我们友好的黄牛党朋友说 |
| [09:05] | says he’s running late. | 他要晚点到 |
| [09:07] | Does he sound like a criminal? | 他声音听起来像是罪犯吗 |
| [09:10] | What do you mean? | 这话什么意思 |
| [09:11] | You know, did he say things like, | 他会不会这么说话 |
| [09:13] | “Youse guys,” or “listen here, see?” | “你们仨小弱鸡” 或者”你们给老子听好了” |
| [09:20] | Yes. He-He’s late | 对 他迟到是因为 |
| [09:21] | because he’s on his way here from 1940. | 他得从1940年穿越过来 |
| [09:25] | I’m just saying. | 提个醒嘛 |
| [09:26] | We don’t know who this guy is. | 我们不知道这家伙的底细 |
| [09:27] | What if he wants to steal our money or our kidneys, | 要是他想偷我们的钱 想割我们的肾 |
| [09:29] | or make a suit out of our skins? | 或者是想剥我们的皮做衣服怎么办 |
| [09:33] | Why would someone want to make clothes out of your skin? | 人家干嘛要用你的皮肤做衣服啊 |
| [09:36] | I don’t know. | 谁知道呢 |
| [09:37] | Maybe ’cause dark doesn’t show the stains? | 没准是因为深色皮肤比较耐脏 |
| [09:41] | Well, now you’re making me wonder | 你这么一说 我的确觉得 |
| [09:42] | if we should have met him at a neutral location. | 也许我们该选一个中立的地方见面 |
| [09:44] | Why do you think I told him to come to your place? | 所以我才叫他到你家来啊 |
| [09:56] | There sure are a lot of little kids here. | 这里的小孩子可真多 |
| [09:58] | I can’t believe we thought this would makes us feel grown up. | 不敢相信我们居然以为这里会有成熟的感觉 |
| [10:00] | I can’t believe the waiter thought I was your daughter. | 我才不敢相信服务生以为我是你女儿 |
| [10:06] | Well, last time I got dressed up | 我上一次梳妆打扮 |
| [10:07] | and had tea was when I was five. | 享受下午茶时光还是在我五岁那年 |
| [10:09] | Just me, my teddy bear, Raggedy Ann and my hamster. | 当时有我 我的泰迪熊 破烂娃娃和我的仓鼠 |
| [10:12] | – That’s cute. – It was. | -好有爱啊 -的确如此 |
| [10:14] | Till my hamster ate all her babies. | 直到我的仓鼠吃光了她的宝宝 |
| [10:19] | It got less cute really fast. | 立刻就不那么可爱了 |
| [10:23] | Should we leave? | 我们走吗 |
| [10:24] | Well, there’s a bar in the lobby. | 大厅那里有个酒吧 |
| [10:26] | I could go for a drink. | 我可以喝上一杯 |
| [10:28] | Drinking in the afternoon, just like her mommy. | 下午就开始喝酒 有其母必有其女 |
| [10:44] | Let me guess. | 让我猜猜 |
| [10:45] | You like Star Wars. | 你一定喜欢《星际大战》吧 |
| [10:51] | You know, I’ve been in other movies. | 要知道 我也演过其他电影 |
| [10:57] | But you don’t care about those, do you? | 但对你来说其他电影根本无所谓 对吗 |
| [11:07] | I have one thing to say to people like you… | 对你这种人 我只能说一句话 |
| [11:12] | I like Star Wars too. | 我也好喜欢《星际大战》 |
| [11:17] | Care to join me? | 愿意赏光坐下吗 |
| [11:19] | Thank you. | 太谢谢你了 |
| [11:22] | My friend Leonard said | 我的朋友莱纳德说 |
| [11:23] | if I bothered you while you were eating, | 要是在你吃饭时骚扰你 |
| [11:24] | you’d think I was a creepy stalker. | 你肯定以为我是个变态跟踪狂 |
| [11:28] | Well your friend Leonard sounds like a real weenie. | 这位莱纳德听起来是个孬种呢 |
| [11:34] | He is, Mr. Earl Jones, he is. | 你说对了 厄尔·琼斯先生 他就是 |
| [11:40] | Okay, so, I’m on a Comic-Con message board, | 我正在浏览一个动漫展的留言板 |
| [11:43] | and there’s a post from a guy | 有个家伙发了帖 |
| [11:45] | where he says he got caught using someone else’s badge… | 说他冒用别人的票被发现了 |
| [11:49] | and Sheldon was right– | 而且谢尔顿也说对了 |
| [11:50] | he did get charged with petty theft. Guys… | 他被以轻微盗窃罪起诉了 各位 |
| [11:53] | if I go to jail dressed as the Human Torch, | 要是我穿着霹雳侠的服装被送进监狱 |
| [11:55] | 霹雳侠服装是紧身衣 | |
| [11:55] | that might send the wrong message. | 肯定会引起误会的 |
| [12:00] | Maybe this isn’t a good idea. | 或许这的确不是个好主意 |
| [12:03] | I can text the guy and tell him we changed our minds. | 我可以给他发短信说我们反悔了 |
| [12:07] | Do it. | 就这么做吧 |
| [12:09] | Okay. | 好呀 |
| [12:10] | We’re officially not going to Comic-Con. | 我们正式决定不去动漫展 |
| [12:15] | Hold on. We always do this. | 等一下 我们总做同样的事 |
| [12:18] | – Do what? – Chicken out. | -做什么事 -临阵退缩 |
| [12:20] | We’re-we’re so afraid of getting into trouble | 我们太害怕惹祸上身 |
| [12:22] | that we never do anything wrong. | 所以我们从来也不敢做坏事 |
| [12:24] | That’s ’cause we’re the good guys. | 因为我们是好人啊 |
| [12:25] | Even Batman breaks the rules. | 就算是蝙蝠侠也有不守规矩的时候 |
| [12:27] | You know I struggle with Batman. | 你知道我对蝙蝠侠爱恨交加 |
| [12:31] | I-I say, this one time, | 就这一次也好 |
| [12:33] | instead of wimping out, let’s be badasses! | 别再畏手畏脚了 让我们放纵一次吧 |
| [12:37] | Okay, I’ll be a badass– | 好呀 变坏就变坏 |
| [12:38] | but only if you pinky-swear to be one, too. | 可你要和人家打勾勾约定你也要变坏 |
| [12:43] | – Howard, you in on this? – No need. | -霍华德 你要加入吗 -不用了 |
| [12:45] | I’m breaking rules all the time. | 哥就是一个不守规矩的活教材 |
| [12:48] | – Name one. – Last night. | -举个例子 -昨晚 |
| [12:51] | Drank my Pepto straight out of the bottle. | 我直接从瓶嘴喝了舒胃灵 |
| [12:56] | What about that little cup they give you? | 你没用人家发附赠的小杯杯吗 |
| [12:58] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [13:00] | What about it? | 那又怎么样 |
| [13:05] | A-Are you impressed by that? | 有被他的气势震住吗 |
| [13:06] | – A little. – Yeah, me, too. | -有一点 -我也是 |
| [13:12] | You know, when I first read the script for Empire Strikes Back | 当我读《帝国反击战》的剧本 |
| [13:15] | and Darth Vader told Luke he was his father… | 第一次读到黑武士告诉卢克自己是他父亲时 |
| [13:18] | …I thought for sure he was lying. | 我想这家伙肯定在说谎 |
| [13:21] | Me, too! | 我也有同感 |
| [13:23] | But he wasn’t, was he? | 可他没有说谎 对不对 |
| [13:24] | He was not! | 他没有 |
| [13:26] | How messed up was that?! | 还能再狗血一点吗 |
| [13:30] | So messed up. | 太狗血了 |
| [13:32] | What do you say let’s go have some fun? | 我们一起去开心一下 好不好 |
| [13:35] | My wife’s in New York, | 我老婆在纽约 |
| [13:36] | and I got a Lion King residual check | 我有一张《狮子王》的酬金支票 |
| [13:38] | burning a hole in my pocket. | 都快在我口袋里磨出茧来了 |
| [13:43] | So, afternoon tea was a bust. | 所以 下午茶一点不好玩 |
| [13:45] | On the bright side, every six-year-old there | 从好的方面看 每个六岁的小女孩 |
| [13:47] | was jealous of my tiara. | 都对我的皇冠羡慕嫉妒恨 |
| [13:50] | Not gonna lie– it felt good. | 实话实说 这种感觉倍儿爽 |
| [13:54] | Let me ask you a question: | 我问你 |
| [13:56] | When did you guys start feeling grown up? | 你们何时开始意识到自己长大成人了 |
| [13:58] | ‘Cause I am not sure I do. | 因为我对自己有点迷惘了 |
| [14:00] | Honestly, I thought when I got married I would, | 老实说 我以为结婚会让我变得成熟 |
| [14:02] | but I still kind of feel like I’m pretending. | 可我依然觉得自己还在拼命装大人 |
| [14:05] | It doesn’t help that most of my clothes come from Gap Kids. | 衣服都是童装部买的 难怪会底气不足 |
| [14:09] | Okay, so I’m an adult, | 我算是个成年人了 |
| [14:11] | and the other day I saw an old man slip and fall down, | 那天我看到一位老人滑倒在地 |
| [14:14] | and I laughed. | 于是我笑了 |
| [14:16] | I mean, I laughed hard. | 笑得花枝乱颤 |
| [14:19] | Like-like, out loud. | 简直是 放声大笑 |
| [14:21] | If he was conscious, he would’ve heard me. | 他如果没昏过去 肯定听到我在大声笑 |
| [14:25] | – Oh, my gosh. – I know. | -天啊 -我知道 |
| [14:26] | One of the tennis balls came off his walker | 他的助行器上垫底的网球掉了一颗 |
| [14:28] | and bounced right off his head. I mean… | 正好弹在他的头上 那真是 |
| [14:31] | I… I almost wet myself. | 我差点笑尿了 |
| [14:36] | I guess you had to be there. | 不身临其境是无法体会滴 |
| [14:39] | I think I have you both beat. | 我觉得我比你们都惨 |
| [14:40] | Imagine trying to feel like a grown-up | 试想一下 我得硬装出成熟 |
| [14:41] | when you’ve never even been with a man. | 可我从来没跟男人发生过关系 |
| [14:43] | Okay, sex is not what makes you a grown-up. | 做爱不代表你就长大了 |
| [14:46] | Yeah. Or you’d be the oldest one here. | 对啊 不然这里你最老了 |
| [14:51] | Really? | 是吗 |
| [14:52] | Is that how you talk to your mother? | 你就这么跟你老妈说话的吗 |
| [14:58] | He just parked. He’s on his way up. | 他停车了 马上上来 |
| [15:00] | Good. This is exciting. | 太好了 好激动啊 |
| [15:01] | – It is. I feel alive. – Yeah. | -就是 -是啊 |
| [15:03] | What if we do get caught; who cares? | 就算我们被抓了又有什么所谓 |
| [15:05] | So we get banned from Comic-Con. | 不就是被禁止参加动漫展嘛 |
| [15:06] | – Maybe slapped with a fine. – Oh, no. | -也许交个罚款 -不不 |
| [15:08] | I’ll be an astronaut and a bad boy– | 我既是宇航员 又是坏男人 |
| [15:10] | how will women keep their pants on? | 女人怎么克制得住对我的冲动呢 |
| [15:13] | Uh, maybe it’ll come up when I apply for citizenship. | 或许当我申请公民资格时 还能显摆一下这事 |
| [15:17] | Oh, crap, what if it comes up when I apply for citizenship? | 靠 万一申请公民资格时 这事被知道了怎么办 |
| [15:21] | I wonder if we’d have to disclose something like this | 不知道我们申请津贴时 这种事 |
| [15:23] | when we apply for grants. | 需不需要坦白上报 |
| [15:25] | He’s gonna be here any second– what should we do? | 他马上就来了 我们怎么办 |
| [15:27] | You guys are such babies. | 你们这两个没用的小屁孩 |
| [15:29] | I’ll handle this. | 交给哥处理吧 |
| [15:32] | If he thinks we’re not home, he’ll go away. | 如果他以为我们不在家 就会走了 |
| [15:37] | I thought you were a badass. | 你不是坏男人吗 |
| [15:38] | I lied about the Pepto– I always use the little cup! | 舒胃灵的事我说谎了 我都是用小杯子喝的 |
| [15:48] | Is it true, as a child, you were a stutterer | 你小时候 曾经是个结巴 |
| [15:51] | and were functionally mute for eight years? | 而且八年不能说话 这事是真的吗 |
| [15:54] | It is true. | 是真的 |
| [15:56] | Is it true they used scuba gear | 他们用水中呼吸器制造出 |
| [16:00] | to create the sound of Darth Vader breathing? | 黑武士的呼吸声 这事是真的吗 |
| [16:02] | They sure did. | 是真的 |
| [16:05] | Is it true that you were premed in college | 你读过医学预科 差点成为医生 |
| [16:09] | and you almost became a doctor? | 这事是真的吗 |
| [16:11] | That’s right. | 千真万确 |
| [16:12] | Oh, James! | 詹姆斯 |
| [16:14] | I could listen to your stories all night. | 你的故事 我听一整晚都不腻 |
| [16:26] | I mean, really, what’s so great about being grown up? | 说真的 长大成人有什么好的呀 |
| [16:29] | Well, for starters, we’d be splitting this check three ways. | 首先 这张账单可以三人平分 |
| [16:34] | I’m serious. Who wants to do all that stuff? | 我说真的 谁愿意做这些事啊 |
| [16:37] | Have insurance, pay mortgages, | 买保险 还贷款 |
| [16:39] | leave one of those little notes when you hit a parked car. | 撞到停着的车后 还要留张自己联系方式的小条 |
| [16:43] | I told you it was Penny. | 我跟你说了是佩妮 |
| [16:46] | Oh, come on, it wasn’t me. | 拜托 不是我 |
| [16:47] | Anyone could have knocked your mirror off… | 任何人都有可能撞掉你的后视镜 |
| [16:49] | or whatever happened. | 或是其它什么的 |
| [16:54] | Maybe the guys are right. | 也许男生们说得对 |
| [16:55] | I mean, we spent the whole night trying to be mature, | 我们整晚都想显得成熟 |
| [16:57] | and it was kind of boring. | 其实蛮无聊的 |
| [16:59] | I’m sure they’re having more fun than we are. | 我相信他们一定比我们要玩得开心 |
| [17:03] | Oh, God, I could really use | 老天爷 我现在 |
| [17:05] | exactly two tablespoons of Pepto right now. | 还真用得着两大勺舒胃灵 |
| [17:18] | Hey, Los Angeles! | 洛杉矶 |
| [17:20] | I’m on a Ferris wheel with Darth Vader! | 我和黑武士一起坐摩天轮 |
| [17:23] | And he’s nicer than you think! | 他比你们想象的要友善多了 |
| [17:27] | I am! | 是啊 |
| [17:33] | * In the jungle, the mighty jungle * | * 在丛林里 非凡的丛林里 * |
| [17:37] | * The lion sleeps tonight * | * 狮子今晚睡着了 * |
| [17:40] | Bring it home, Mufasa. | 露一手 穆法沙 |
| [17:40] | 《狮子今晚睡着了》是《狮子王》电影著名插曲 穆法沙是狮子王的父亲 | |
| [17:51] | I don’t understand what we’re doing. | 我不明白这是做什么 |
| [17:54] | Whose house is that? | 这是谁的家 |
| [17:55] | Carrie Fisher. | 凯莉·费雪 |
| [17:58] | And she’s a little crazy, | 她是个疯婆子 |
| [17:59] | so get ready to run. | 准备好闪人 |
| [18:15] | It’s not funny anymore, James! | 这一点都不好玩 詹姆斯 |
| [18:20] | Then why am I laughing! | 那我为什么在笑呢 |
| [18:30] | Ah, Sheldon, this is the perfect end | 谢尔顿 这是完美之夜的 |
| [18:32] | to a perfect night. | 完美结局 |
| [18:36] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [18:39] | Yeah, but I think it could have ended with the karaoke. | 但我觉得卡拉OK时就已经是完美的结局 |
| [18:42] | What were you trying to ask me at the strip club? | 你在脱衣舞俱乐部时想问我什么来着 |
| [18:48] | How much does it cost to get them off my lap? | 让她们从我大腿上下去要花多少钱 |
| [18:52] | No. Something about a convention. | 不 什么展的事 |
| [18:54] | Oh, right! Well… | 对哦 是这样的 |
| [18:56] | my friends and I couldn’t get into Comic-Con this year, | 我和小伙伴们今年没买到动漫展的票 |
| [18:59] | and I was trying to start my own convention, | 我想自己举办一个动漫展 |
| [19:02] | and I was going to ask | 我想问你 |
| [19:04] | if you would be a panelist. | 你能受邀来参加访谈吗 |
| [19:07] | Why don’t you and your friends come to Comic-Con with me? | 你和小伙伴们何不跟我一起去动漫大会呢 |
| [19:10] | – Really? – Of course. | -真的吗 -当然 |
| [19:11] | And San Diego is right across the border | 而且地球上我最爱的城市 |
| [19:13] | from my favorite city on Earth, | 就在圣地亚哥边界旁 |
| [19:16] | Tijuana… | 提华纳[墨西哥城市 毒品猖獗] |
| [19:20] | …where I’m taking you every night! | 我每晚都会带你去 |
| [19:24] | Ay-yi-yi. | 亲娘滴 |
| [19:27] | Ay-yi-yi, bang-bang. | 亲娘滴 好爽哦 |
| [19:36] | So, Beau Bridges is on my shoulders, | 博·布里奇斯在我肩膀上 |
| [19:39] | and Jeff Bridges is on Marlon Brando’s shoulders, | 杰夫·布里奇斯在马龙·白兰度的肩膀上 |
| [19:39] | 所说人物皆为知名老牌好莱坞电影明星 | |
| [19:42] | and remember, we do not have permission to be in the pool– | 别忘了 我们没得到进泳池的允许 |
| [19:46] | Hey! Sheldon, wake up! | 谢尔顿 醒醒 |
| [19:49] | And… | 然后 |
| [19:49] | Angie Dickinson is about to sic the dogs on us, | 安吉·迪金森准备放狗咬我们 |
| [19:52] | and I go under the water and Marlon goes under the water, | 我跳下水 马龙也跳下水 |
| [19:55] | and the water raises about two feet | 水花溅起了两尺高 |
| [19:57] | and sloshes all over her patio, | 溅得她露台上到处都是 |
| [19:58] | and the dogs freak out and run like hell, | 把狗吓坏了 拼命逃跑 |
| [20:00] | and then we run like hell… | 然后我们也拼命逃跑 |
| [20:01] | Oh, boy! | 老天啊 |
| [20:04] | That was a lot of fun. | 太搞笑了 |
| [20:08] | Uh… who’s Angie Dickinson? | 安吉·迪金森是谁啊 |
| [20:08] | 生于1931年的知名美腿好莱坞女星 |