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生活大爆炸(The Big Bang)第7季第4集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 生活大爆炸(The Big Bang)第7季第4集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
时间 英文 中文
[00:10] So what’d you think? 你觉得如何
[00:11] It was good. 还不错
[00:12] That’s it? 就这样吗
[00:14] “Good”? “还不错”
[00:15] I enjoyed it. 我看得挺开心啊
[00:17] When you told me I was going to be “losing my virginity,” 你说要让我”体验第一次”的时候
[00:19] I didn’t think you meant showing me 我没有想到你是指
[00:20] Raiders of the Lost Ark for the first time. “第一次”看《夺宝奇兵》啊
[00:20] 动作冒险电影 1981年的年度票房冠军
[00:24] My apologies. I chose my words poorly. 我的错 我用词太不准确了
[00:27] I should have said you were about 我应该说 “你将会
[00:28] to have your world rocked on my couch. 在我沙发上爽入云霄”
[00:33] Anyway, thank you for watching it. 总之 谢谢你陪我看完
[00:35] It’s one of my all-time favorites. 这是我最爱的电影之一
[00:38] It was very entertaining… 这电影娱乐性非常高
[00:39] despite the glaring story problem. 可惜情节漏洞百出
[00:43] Story problem?! 情节漏洞百出
[00:45] You– oh, Amy… 你… 艾米
[00:49] What a dewy-eyed moon-calf you are. 你真是好傻好天真啊
[00:52] Raiders of the Lost Ark is the love child 《夺宝奇兵》这电影
[00:55] of Steven Spielberg and George Lucas, 是斯蒂芬·斯皮尔伯格与乔治·卢卡斯
[00:57] two of the most gifted filmmakers of our generation. 这两位当代最有才制片人的心血结晶
[01:00] I’ve watched it 36 times, 我看了足足有36遍
[01:02] except for the snake scene and the face-melting scene, 除了满是蛇与脸融化的那两幕
[01:06] which I can only watch when it’s still light out, but… 只有天还亮的时候我才敢看 但…
[01:09] I defy you to find a story problem. 有本事你说出个情节漏洞我听听
[01:12] Here’s my jaw… 让我的下巴
[01:14] drop it. 吓掉吧
[01:16] All right. 行啊
[01:18] Indiana Jones plays no role 主角印第安纳·琼斯的存在
[01:20] in the outcome of the story. 对电影的结局没有任何影响
[01:22] If he weren’t in the film, 就算把他从故事里删掉
[01:23] it would turn out exactly the same. 电影结局也不会有任何差别
[01:26] Oh, I see your confusion. You don’t understand. 我知道你问题在哪了 你没搞清楚
[01:29] Indiana Jones was the one in the hat with the whip. 戴帽子拿鞭子那男的才是印第安纳·琼斯
[01:34] No, I do, 我当然知道
[01:35] and if he weren’t in the movie, 就算电影里没他
[01:37] the Nazis would have still found the ark, 纳粹还是会找到法柜
[01:39] taken it to the island, opened it up and all died… 送上孤岛 打开法柜 然后死光光
[01:42] just like they did. 跟有他的版本一样
[01:49] Let me close that for ya. 我替你把下巴合上吧
[02:20] I thought you went to the comic book store on Wednesdays. 你不都是周三才去逛漫画店的吗
[02:23] Yeah, but Sheldon and Amy were having date night 但谢尔顿跟艾米今晚是约会之夜
[02:26] and they don’t need me there to make it awkward. 他们不需要我来把场面弄尴尬
[02:29] They have each other for that. 他们靠彼此就够尴尬了
[02:33] So, how was school? 最近课上得怎么样
[02:34] Oh, good. Check it out. 很好啊 你看
[02:35] The Disappointing Child by Beverly Hofstadter. 《扶不起的阿斗》 作者是贝芙莉·霍夫斯塔德
[02:48] – You bought my mom’s book? – Yeah! -你居然买我妈的书 -对啊
[02:51] It’s on the recommended reading list for my psychology class. 这是我心理学课的推荐读物呢
[02:58] Come on. Not that book. 不是吧 选其他本书啊
[03:00] It-It’s got, like, every horrible story 里面详细记录了我从小到大
[03:03] from my childhood in it. 每一段丢人事
[03:06] Oh, cool. Are there pictures? 太棒了 书里有照片吗
[03:10] Seriously, please find another book. 求你了 换一本书吧
[03:12] Oh, come on. Why? How bad could it be? 拜托 能把你写得多糟糕啊
[03:14] There-There’s chapters about potty training, 里面有章节是写训练我如厕
[03:17] and bed-wetting and… 写尿床
[03:19] masturbation. 以及自慰
[03:23] Basically, if something came out of me, 基本上 有东西从我体内出来
[03:25] she wrote about it! 她都有写下来
[03:28] You know what? Do whatever you want, 这样吧 你想看就看
[03:30] just don’t talk to me about it. 但看完别来跟我谈论
[03:32] Not even the chapter on the breast-feeding crisis? 连”喂奶危机”那一段都不能聊吗
[03:40] It was not a crisis. 才不是什么危机咧
[03:43] Apparently, I favored the left one, 也就是我比较喜欢吸左奶
[03:45] she got a little lopsided. 害她左右不平衡罢了
[03:49] Oh, my God, you still go left! 天啊 你现在还是挑左边呢
[03:56] Which celebrity would you say I look like the most? 你觉得我看起来最像哪个明星
[03:59] Halle Berry. 哈莉·贝瑞
[03:59] 好莱坞著名黑白混血女演员 外表十分出色
[04:03] Why? 问这干嘛
[04:04] Stuart and I are putting dating profiles online, 我跟斯图尔特要填征友网站的资料
[04:06] and it’s one of the questions. 这是其中一道题
[04:08] And thank you– I’d kill for that woman’s bone structure. 不过谢谢夸奖 她的身材骨架棒呆了
[04:13] Why are you reading Pride and Prejudice? 你为什么在读《傲慢与偏见》啊
[04:16] I’ll tell you why. 我告诉你为什么
[04:17] Amy ruined Raiders of the Lost Ark for me, 艾米把我对《夺宝奇兵》的爱给毁了
[04:20] so now I’m trying to find 所以我现在也要找出
[04:21] something beloved to her and ruin that. 她钟爱的事物来毁掉它
[04:25] Because her life wasn’t enough? 她这一生还被毁得不够多吗
[04:30] Wait… 等等
[04:31] how can, how can anyone ruin Raiders? 《夺宝奇兵》怎么可能会有瑕疵呢
[04:34] It’s perfect. 这可是完美杰作
[04:35] Yeah, except for the fact that Indiana Jones 除了主角对于故事剧情发展
[04:37] is completely irrelevant to the story. With or without him, 没有任何存在的必要 无论电影有他没他
[04:40] the Nazis find the ark, open it and die. 纳粹还是会找到法柜 打开 然后死光
[04:51] Hey, wait a minute. 等等
[04:52] No, the Nazis were digging in the wrong place. 不对啊 纳粹本来挖错了地点
[04:55] The only reason they got the ark 他们之所以能找到法柜
[04:56] was because Indy found it first. 全因主角先找到它
[04:58] Actually, they were only digging in the wrong place 纳粹之所以会挖错地方
[05:00] because Indy had the medallion. 全因”拉雅之杆”元件在主角手里
[05:00] 该元件是电影中 找到正确藏宝处的关键
[05:01] Without him, they would have had the medallion 没有主角 元件会落在纳粹手中
[05:02] and dug in the right place. 他们直接就到正确地点挖宝了
[05:13] Okay, I know you don’t want to talk about it, 我知道你不想谈书中内容
[05:15] but can I just ask you one question about your mom’s book? 但我真有一个问题想问你
[05:18] No. 不行
[05:19] I just want to know 我就想知道
[05:20] why a five-year-old boy puts on his mom’s makeup 为什么五岁男孩会拿妈的化妆品化妆
[05:22] and wears balloon boobies. 然后用气球当咪咪
[05:28] They weren’t boobies, they were muscles. 那些不是咪咪 是胸肌
[05:31] And the makeup was green. 化妆是画绿妆
[05:32] I was pretending to be The Hulk. 我想把自己画成绿巨人浩克
[05:35] You were wearing her bra. 但你戴着她胸罩
[05:36] That was to keep my muscles from sagging! 那是为了让我的”胸肌”不下垂
[05:37] Can we please stop talking about this?! 我们可以不谈这话题了吗
[05:41] Okay, okay. 好啦 好啦
[05:42] But you know, as a student of psychology 但作为一个心理学的学生
[05:44] who got a check-plus on her first homework assignment… 还是作业得到了√+评价的学生
[05:48] I think, sometimes, it’s good to 有时候 说出童年阴影
[05:50] open up about these things. 也是挺不错的啊
[05:51] Okay, fine. 好吧 行
[05:52] Do you want to know why I dressed like The Hulk? 你想知道为什么我打扮成绿巨人吗
[05:54] Because I was always mad at my mom 因为我总是很气我妈
[05:56] and I wanted to smash my way out of that house. 我想要一拳砸烂我家 然后逃走
[05:59] Well, why were you so angry? 你心里为什么这么多怨气呢
[06:00] Gee, I don’t know. 我也不知道
[06:02] Maybe it’s because I was always the subject of her little experiments. 或许因为我总是她的实验品
[06:05] Did you get to the chapter where she staged the Easter egg hunt 你有看到”寻找复活节彩蛋”那章吗
[06:08] with no eggs to see how long I’d keep looking? 根本就没有彩蛋 她故意试试我能找多久
[06:12] The answer, by the way: 对了 答案是
[06:12] 复活节的日期大致在公历3月22日至4月25日之间
[06:13] June. 我找到六月份
[06:16] Sweetie, I’m so sorry. 亲爱的 真的很对不起
[06:18] I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better. 真希望我能做些什么 让你好过一点
[06:20] I do, too, but there’s not. 我也希望 但是你不能
[06:22] Really? Are you sure about that? 真的吗 你确定吗
[06:28] Of course, who am I to argue with a check-plus student? 当然 我怎么能质疑√+学生呢
[06:33] Just warning you– I’m gonna go right. 先警告你啊 这次我挑右胸
[06:34] Don’t make a big deal out of it. 别小题大做问我为什么
[06:44] Is makeup really necessary? 真的有必要化妆吗
[06:47] Well, when someone looks at your dating profile, 一般人们看你的征友信息
[06:49] the first thing they see is your picture. 第一眼肯定是先看你的照片啊
[06:51] I just want to make sure you look fun 我只是想让你看起来不那么无趣
[06:53] and full of life and not like a body 充满生气 而不是像一具刚从河里
[06:55] they just pulled out of the river. 捞出来的尸体那样死气沉沉
[06:58] All right, here we go, and… 好了 开始吧
[07:01] smile. 笑一个
[07:08] Okay, uh-uh, that one’s in the bank. 好吧 刚才那张不算
[07:11] How about this? 不如这样
[07:12] Turn away, and then turn back into it. 你先把头转过去 然后再转回来
[07:14] But when you do, 当你回头时
[07:15] imagine the camera is the girl you want to meet. 把相机想象成你想见到的女生
[07:19] You got it. 没问题
[07:30] Okay, uh, 好吧
[07:31] let’s try it again. 再来一遍
[07:33] Uh, but this time, pretend the girl you want to meet 但这一次 你要把相机当成是你想见到
[07:36] doesn’t want to hurt you. 而且不会揍你的女生
[07:40] I don’t think I can give you that. 这个恐怕有点难度
[07:42] Come on. One more time. 拜托 再试一次
[07:54] Yeah, it’s, it’s a little blurry, 好吧 这张有点模糊
[07:56] but I think that works in your favor. 不过这应该对你有益无害
[07:59] – Do you want a beer? – Sure. -想喝啤酒吗 -好啊
[08:01] Hey, have you finished writing your profile yet? 你的征友信息写完了吗
[08:04] Almost. 差不多了
[08:05] Oh, what did you put “用一个词形容自己”
[08:06] as the one-word description of yourself? 你用的是哪个词
[08:08] I put unobjectionable. 我用了”不讨人厌”
[08:11] But now that I hear it out loud, 但是当我亲耳听到这个词时
[08:12] it just seems like I’m being cocky. 感觉好像有点过于自信了
[08:15] What did you put for your best feature? 那你优点你写了什么
[08:17] My parents’ money. 我的父母是土豪
[08:21] Uh, what did you put for your best feature? 那你的优点你写什么
[08:23] I put not applicable. 我写了”无”
[08:27] Come on, dude, you’re being too hard on yourself. 拜托 伙计 你对自己太严苛了
[08:29] You’ve got a lot of good stuff going on. 你具备很多优秀的条件啊
[08:31] Really? Like what? 真的吗 比如说
[08:32] Well, okay, you’re a, you’re a talented artist, 你是一个有天赋的艺术家
[08:35] you own your own business. 你有自己的事业
[08:37] Neither of those things have ever helped me meet a woman. 但这两者未曾对我泡妞有过帮助
[08:40] Okay, well, can we imply 好吧 那我们能暗示
[08:43] that you’re well-endowed? 你”那方面”天赋异禀吗
[08:46] I do have one oddly long testicle. 我的确是有个特别长的… 睾丸
[08:52] Okay, now you’re talking like a winner! 现在像个有自信的男人在说话了
[08:58] Whatcha doin’? 你在干什么
[09:00] Oh, it turns out Amy’s beloved Pride and Prejudice 我发现艾米喜欢的《傲慢与偏见》
[09:03] is a flawless masterpiece. 是一部毫无瑕疵的杰作
[09:06] He’s got too much pride, 男主角的确很傲慢
[09:07] she’s got too much prejudice– 女主角的确很多偏见
[09:09] it just works. 毫无破绽可言
[09:11] So you’re looking to ruin something for her 所以你为了要毁掉她喜欢的东西
[09:13] in the funny pages? 你都开始看漫画了吗
[09:14] Amy has a fondness for the comic strip Marmaduke. 艾米喜欢看《大丹麦狗马默杜克》的连载漫画
[09:14] 《大丹麦狗马默杜克》是美国家喻户晓的一个动画人物 故事的主角是一只顽皮的巨型犬大丹麦狗
[09:19] And…? 然后呢
[09:20] And I think I’ve got it. 我觉得我找到了
[09:22] Consider: 想一下
[09:23] a family possesses a dog that is so large 一个家庭里有一只这么大
[09:26] and poorly disciplined, 而且丝毫不守规矩
[09:27] he causes nothing but problems. 除了惹麻烦就什么都不会的巨型犬
[09:30] Why do they keep him?! 他们为什么还要养它呢
[09:33] Maybe they fell in love with him as a puppy 或许是因为他们爱上它的时候 它还只是小狗
[09:36] and didn’t know how big he was gonna be. 那家人也没想到它能长这么大
[09:38] Of course. 有道理
[09:40] You know, why couldn’t she just like Ziggy? 为什么她不喜欢《奇奇》
[09:40] 著名报刊连载漫画
[09:42] Yeah? 真是的
[09:43] That thing’s riddled with plot holes. 那部漫画情节漏洞百出
[09:47] Sorry, buddy. 真是可惜啊 伙计
[09:49] I think she’s a fan of Garfield as well. 我觉得她也喜欢《加菲猫》
[09:53] Oh, darn it, now so am I. 靠 现在我也是加菲迷了
[09:56] I’ll see you later. 晚点见
[09:57] I gotta go watch a stupid football game with Penny. 我得陪佩妮去看一场白痴的球赛
[09:59] Wait– hang on. 慢着 先别走
[10:00] You’ve spent time with Amy. 你跟艾米一起待过
[10:02] Can you think of anything she’s fond of 你能想到什么她喜欢的东西
[10:04] that has a bunch of flaws she hasn’t noticed? 然后还有很多她没有注意到的瑕疵吗
[10:13] I gotta go. 我真得走了
[10:19] – You ready to go? – Yep. -准备好了吗 -好了
[10:21] Hey, and maybe this time 对了 或许这次
[10:22] you don’t try and talk sports with the guys. 你别再跟那些男生讨论体育了
[10:26] Some sports bar. 什么破体育酒吧
[10:27] It’s like they never even heard of Quidditch. 他们居然从来没听说过魁地奇球赛
[10:27] 出自《哈利·波特》 参赛者在飞天扫帚上进行的一种虚构比赛
[10:30] Do we really have to go? 我们真的得去吗
[10:31] Oh, come on. Every time we’re about 别这样嘛 每次我们
[10:33] to hang out with my friends, you don’t want to. 要去跟我的朋友玩 你都不想去
[10:34] It’s like, “It’s too loud,” 每次都说”太吵了”
[10:36] or “the bathroom’s too dirty,” “厕所太脏了”
[10:37] or “they put a chicken wing in my ear…” I mean… “他们拿鸡翅插我耳朵”
[10:41] Well, you’re-you’re right. 你说得对
[10:42] Let’s just go. 我们走吧
[10:43] Hey, what’s going on with you? 你到底怎么了
[10:44] Nothing, I’m fine. 没事 我很好啊
[10:46] All right, hang on. 好吧 先别走
[10:47] is this still about your mom’s book? 是不是还是因为你妈妈的书
[10:49] No. Not everything is about my mom. 不是 不是所有事情都跟我妈有关
[10:51] ‘Cause if you’re still upset about that, 如果你还在为此而不开心
[10:52] we don’t have to go. 我们可以不用去的
[10:53] Except this is totally about my mom. 不过这次真的是因为我妈
[10:58] I’m so sorry. 真的很对不起
[10:59] I never should have read that book. 我真不应该看那本书的
[11:00] You know what? You want to just get dinner 那你想去吃个晚餐
[11:02] and watch the game here? 然后回来这里看比赛吗
[11:03] – That sounds nice. – Okay. -这主意不错 -好
[11:06] Or, you know, we could get take-out 或者我们也可以买外卖
[11:07] and watch the Blu-ray extended version 然后在这里看蓝光加长附带
[11:09] of The Hobbit movie with commentary track. 导演评论音轨版的《霍比特人》电影啊
[11:15] On account of how sad I am about my mom. 因为我被我妈这件事弄得太难过了嘛
[11:23] Leonard, you ready for lunch? 莱纳德 准备好吃饭了吗
[11:25] One sec! 稍等
[11:28] Hey. Sorry. 抱歉
[11:32] – Hi, Penny. – Hi. -你好啊 佩妮 -好啊
[11:34] All right, sweetie. 好啦 宝贝
[11:35] You hang in there today. 你今天要打起精神来哦
[11:37] I’ll try, but I might be sad again tonight. 我尽量 但可能晚上我又不开心了
[11:38] Okay. 好
[11:43] Sex at work?! 上班打炮
[11:45] Leave it alone. 别这么说
[11:46] – That’s my girlfriend. – Sorry. -尊重下我女友 -抱歉
[11:48] Who just had sex with me at work! 她刚刚才跟我上班打炮呢
[11:52] Damn. How’d you swing that? 行啊 你怎么做到的
[11:54] Well, whenever I talk about how awful my mom was, 只要我一谈到小时候我妈对我多坏
[11:56] Penny will do anything to make me feel better. 佩妮会愿意做任何事来哄我开心
[11:59] – Seriously? – Look, I mean… -真的吗 -是啊
[12:00] I’m not proud of it, but it does work. 这招是挺贱的 但超级管用
[12:03] I-I got her to watch 我还成功让她
[12:04] a six-part documentary on Monty Python. 陪我看了一部六段落的巨蟒剧团纪录片呢
[12:04] 巨蟒剧团 英国的一组超现实幽默表演团体 对喜剧有十分重大的影响
[12:08] Even I was bored, I just wanted to see 我自己都看闷了 就只是想看她
[12:10] if she’d make it to the end. 能不能撑到最后
[12:12] You sound kind of proud of it. 你听起来蛮引以为傲的嘛
[12:13] I am; I’m really proud. 我的确挺骄傲的
[12:18] Hello, Sheldon. 谢尔顿
[12:19] Is everything okay? 一切都还好吗
[12:20] Yes. 当然啊
[12:21] Why? 为什么
[12:22] Well, the last time you made an unscheduled video-chat, 我们上一次未事先安排就视频聊天
[12:25] there was a curly fry in your regular fries 是因为你的薯条里有一根卷薯条
[12:26] and you thought someone might be trying to slip you a mickey. 你当时怀疑有人想对你下迷药
[12:31] April 13… 4月13日
[12:34] a dark night, indeed. 相当黑暗的一晚
[12:37] So what can I do for you? 所以今晚又有什么事了呢
[12:38] I’m calling to invite you 我打来是想邀请你
[12:40] to a spontaneous date night tomorrow evening. 明天晚上来一场临时约会
[12:43] Really? 真的吗
[12:44] Yes. 是的
[12:45] You were kind enough 你对我这么好
[12:46] to watch Raiders of the Lost Ark with me. 陪我一起看《法柜奇兵》
[12:49] So I’d like to return the favor 我也想还你这份情
[12:51] by inviting you to watch an episode 邀请你来看一集
[12:53] of your favorite childhood television series, 你小时候最爱的电视剧
[12:56] Little House on the Prairie. 《草原小屋》
[13:00] That sounds lovely. 听起来不错
[13:02] Why are you rubbing your hands together? 你为什么在搓手啊
[13:08] I’m putting on lotion. 我是在擦护手霜啊
[13:09] Are you in or not? 你到底来不来
[13:12] Of course I’m in. 当然来
[13:13] Excellent. 非常好
[13:14] Then I shall see you tomorrow. 那我们明天见
[13:16] Good night, Dr. Fowler. 晚安 福勒博士
[13:17] Good night, Dr. Cooper. 晚安 库珀博士
[13:20] Good night, indeed. 今晚[晚安]的确是很棒啊
[13:23] What a rube. 真是白痴
[13:25] Why would I put on lotion when I have such soft hands? 我这双芊芊玉手 怎么可能需要擦护手霜呢
[13:30] You were really quiet during dinner. 你晚餐的时候好安静
[13:31] Is everything okay? 你没事吧
[13:32] Yeah. 没事
[13:33] I guess I was just thinking about my mom, 我只是想起了我妈
[13:35] and how sad my childhood was. 以及我悲惨的童年
[13:40] Yeah, I bet it sucked. 肯定是很惨吧
[13:41] I’m gonna take a bath; you do the dishes. 我要去洗澡了 你洗碗吧
[13:44] How about I take a bath with you 不如我跟你一起共浴
[13:46] and see what happens. 看看会有什么好事发生
[13:48] Here’s what’s gonna happen: 会发生的就是
[13:50] I’m gonna take a bath, 我去洗澡
[13:51] and you’re gonna do the dishes. 你去洗碗
[13:53] That’s it? 就这样吗
[13:53] No compassion? 不同情下我吗
[13:55] Aw, poor Howie. 可怜的华仔
[13:56] We good? I’m gonna take a bath. 行了吗 我要去洗澡了
[13:58] Bernie… 妮妮
[14:00] God, what is going on with you? 天啊 你到底是闹哪样啊
[14:03] I’m sharing my pain. 我是在分享我的悲痛
[14:05] And I’m not buying it. Try again. 我不信这套 说实话
[14:09] I’m learning to be a man in a culture 我在学习怎么在文化环境
[14:12] where it’s increasingly difficult to know how…? 对男人越来越艰难的….
[14:15] Strike two. 最后一次机会
[14:19] I’m copying Leonard. 我在学莱纳德
[14:20] When he does this to Penny, 他对佩妮使这招
[14:21] they have sex and watch Monty Python. 他们就会做爱 然后一起看巨蟒剧团
[14:24] – Howard! – I know. -霍华德 -我知道
[14:25] It was dumb, 这种做法很贱
[14:25] I shouldn’t have done it. 我不应该学他
[14:26] And it’s making me feel sad… 现在我真的觉得难过了
[14:30] So sad. 好难过
[14:34] You know, why don’t you take a bath? I’ll do the dishes. 你去洗澡吧 我来洗碗
[14:40] Three, two, one… 三 二 一
[14:43] That’s it. 好了
[14:45] Our dating profiles are live on the Internet. 我们的个人资料正式在公布在网上了
[14:47] Attention all shoppers: 注意了 各位女顾客
[14:49] my business is open for business! 爷的”大生意”正式对外”开张”啦
[14:53] That’s right, ladies. 没错 女士们
[14:55] For all you know, 告诉你们
[14:56] I’m confident and fun to be around. 我可以充满自信和幽默十足哦
[15:03] Oh, cool, it tells you 酷 这声音告诉你
[15:04] when someone’s reading your profile. 有人在阅读你的个人资料
[15:06] “Jenny309.” “珍妮309”
[15:09] I hope that’s not her weight. 我希望那个数字不是她的体重
[15:13] If it is, I’ll… I’ll take her. 你不要的话 那我要了
[15:16] Good one. 好兄弟
[15:19] Ooh, I got one, too. 也有人来阅读我的资料
[15:21] The ladies are coming to us. 女人正朝咱们涌来
[15:25] Oh, man, if I’d started this years ago, 天啊 如果我早几年就这样做
[15:27] I’d be divorced two or three times by now. 现在没准都离两三次婚了
[15:31] What…? Another one. 什么 又来一个
[15:33] You know, it… it’s weird. 感觉有点怪怪的
[15:35] When they’re reading your profile, does it… 当她们在阅读你的个人资料时
[15:37] does it make you feel exposed? 你有没有感觉像摊开被人检阅一样
[15:39] Like they see you naked? 仿佛她们看到了咱们的裸体一样
[15:42] Well, they’re not running away screaming, so, no. 她们没有尖叫着逃开 所以还好
[15:48] I love Little House. 我好喜欢《草原小屋》
[15:49] It made me want to live on a farm so much 我看了后好想住在农场里
[15:51] I tried to milk my cat. 我甚至去给我的猫挤奶
[15:57] That tangy bowl of Cheerios 结果猫奶泡麦圈臭死了
[15:58] was not worth the stitches. 亏我还被猫抓到要去缝针
[16:01] Well, you sit back, relax 你乖乖坐好 放轻松
[16:04] and enjoy a beloved childhood memory. 重温下心爱的童年美好回忆
[16:11] You see that cabin there? 你看那个小木屋
[16:13] I read they were illegally squatting on Indian land. 相关资料说 是非法侵占印第安人的土地建的
[16:19] Yeah. 是的
[16:19] Personally, I think what we did 就个人而言 我觉得我们
[16:21] to the Native Americans was wrong, 对印第安人的所作所为是错的
[16:23] but this is your favorite show, not mine. 但这是你最喜欢的电视剧 不是我的
[16:27] Oh, look at little Laura Ingalls, 你瞧小劳拉·英格尔斯
[16:29] eating that peanut butter sandwich. 居然在吃花生酱三明治
[16:32] Peanut butter?! 花生酱
[16:36] That’s strange, since peanut butter 真奇怪 因为花生酱
[16:38] wasn’t introduced until the early 1900s. 直到20世纪初才出现
[16:44] If I knew this show was about time travel, 如果早知道这是部时光穿越剧
[16:45] I would have watched it much sooner. 我想我早就看了
[16:51] You’re trying to get back at me 你是在报复我
[16:53] for what I said about Raiders of the Lost Ark. 说了《夺宝奇兵》的坏话
[16:54] That’s silly. 这话真傻
[16:56] Almost as silly as Dr. Baker having a telephone, 傻到和贝克医生有电话一样
[16:59] since telephones only existed 因为在那个年代
[17:00] in large cities at that time. 只有大城市才有电话
[17:03] This is more like Little House on the Preposterous. 这部剧应该叫做《荒谬之地的小木屋》
[17:07] Sheldon, we’re in a relationship. 谢尔顿 我们在谈恋爱
[17:09] When you get angry, just tell me. 如果你生气 告诉我就行了
[17:12] You don’t need to seek revenge. 你不必偷偷想办法报复
[17:14] Are you sure? 你确定吗
[17:17] Every time my dad stayed out all night, 每次我爸彻夜未归
[17:19] my mom would put hamster poop in his chewing tobacco. 我妈就会把仓鼠屎放进他的嚼用烟草里
[17:24] Well, that’s not how we’re going to do it. 我们不会这样
[17:27] Fine. 好的
[17:28] I’m mad at you. 我是在生气
[17:30] Not only did you ruin Raiders for me, 你不仅毁了《夺宝奇兵》在我心中的形象
[17:32] you may have ruined the whole franchise. 甚至可能整个系列都毁了
[17:35] Except for the fourth one, 除了第四部
[17:36] which was bad before you got your mitts on it. 被你的脏手染指之前就是部烂片了
[17:40] I-I shouldn’t have said it. 我不应该说那些话
[17:41] I’m sorry. 对不起
[17:43] Thank you. 谢谢
[17:45] Do you feel better? 你心情好些了吗
[17:46] Yes. 是的
[17:47] But not as good as I’m going to when I tell you 不过在我告诉你 你心爱的加菲猫
[17:49] that your precious Garfield has no reason to hate Mondays. 没理由恨周一后 我的心情会更好
[17:53] He’s a cat. He doesn’t have a job. 他是只猫 他周一又不用去上班
[18:01] Hey, I was just– what is happening? 我正好… 这是怎么回事
[18:05] Oh, just a little treat. 想让你开心一下
[18:07] I know you’ve been feeling really bad 我知道你最近因为你妈妈的事
[18:08] about your mom lately. 很难过
[18:10] Oh, oh, I have. 是难过
[18:11] So bad. 的确好难过
[18:14] And I wanted to make you feel better, 我想让你心情好些
[18:15] so I planned something very special for you. 所以我为你计划了特别的安排
[18:19] I can already feel it working. 我已经感觉到安排在起作用了
[18:23] Hello, Leonard. 你好 莱纳德
[18:28] Mom?! 妈
[18:29] I understand you have been whining about my parenting 我听说你一直在抱怨我的为母之道
[18:32] in order to emotionally manipulate your girlfriend. 以此在感情上来操控你的女友
[18:35] I… uh… 我…
[18:37] Bernadette told me everything. 伯纳黛特把一切都告诉我了
[18:38] Now you don’t get the left or the right. 现在左右咪咪都没你的份了
[18:43] Let’s discuss why you continue to involve me 我们来讨论下你为什么一直将我牵扯进
[18:46] in your sex life. 你的性生活中
[18:48] Oh, please, Mommy. 别这样 妈咪
[18:48] No, Mommy. 不要啦 妈咪
[18:51] When you were six years old, 你六岁时
[18:52] you walked in on me and your father naked. 走进房间 撞到我和你父亲光着身子
[18:56] I was swatting his bottom 我当时用你崭新的
[18:58] with your brand new Ping Pong paddle. 乒乓球拍猛抽他的屁股
[19:04] I didn’t dream that? 那原来不是我做梦吗
[19:08] How did that make you feel? 那件事让你感觉如何
[19:11] Penny, come back! 佩妮 回来吧
[19:12] I’m sad for real now! 我现在真的难过了
[19:16] In the last two hours, 在过去两个小时内
[19:17] 162 women have read our profiles. 162位女性看过了我们的个人资料
[19:20] How many of them have sent us messages? 其中有多少人给我们发了消息
[19:22] – Combined? – Yes. -加起来吗 -是的
[19:24] Zero. 零
[19:28] Dude, this is… this is brutal. 哥们 这真是太残忍了
[19:30] I don’t think I’ve ever felt so rejected. 我从未有过如此强烈的被拒绝感
[19:33] And I had a rescue dog 我曾经救过一只流浪狗
[19:34] who ran back to the pound. 它跑回收容所时 我都没这么难过
[19:39] This is the worst. 这真是太惨了
[19:40] If we’re gonna get shot down, 早知道结果会这样
[19:41] we might as well just go to a bar 还不如去酒吧
[19:43] and do it old school. 用老方法泡妞
[19:44] And make them look us in the eye. 至少能跟她们面对面交流
[19:46] Yeah, anything is better than this. 无论如何也比这样强
[19:48] Hello. 你好
[19:50] Not interested. 没兴趣
[19:54] I was wrong. This is worse. 我错了 这个更惨
[20:05] Wait, wait– if it wasn’t for Indiana Jones, 等等 如果不是因为印第安纳·琼斯
[20:07] the ark would never have ended up at the warehouse! 法柜根本不会到仓库
[20:10] That’s true! 的确如此
[20:11] He collected and delivered the ark 他找到并运送了法柜
[20:13] to the proper authorities for filing. 到有关当局备案
[20:15] Like a hero! 像英雄一般
[20:16] – Yeah! Yes! – Right! -就是 -太棒了
[20:20] Although, technically, 不过 确切来说
[20:21] Indy was supposed to take the ark 印第安纳·琼斯本应该把法柜
[20:23] to a museum to be studied. 送到博物馆做研究
[20:24] He couldn’t even get that done. 他连这事也没办好
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