时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:02] | Well, I must say, Leonard, | 莱纳德 我不得不承认 |
[00:03] | when I first heard your idea for Giant Jenga, | 你一开始提出巨型层层叠的主意时 |
[00:06] | I was skeptical. | 我是持怀疑态度的 |
[00:11] | I can’t blame you– | 这不能怪你 |
[00:12] | Tiny Twister was a complete bust. | 上次的迷你版扭扭乐就烂爆了 |
[00:14] | No, I was wrong. | 但我这次错了 |
[00:16] | The looming threat of | 顶着可能会 |
[00:18] | being crushed under a pile of lumber | 被一堆木头压死的风险玩 |
[00:21] | does add a certain spice. | 让游戏带感了不少 |
[00:24] | I’ve never felt so alive. | 连人都精神起来了 |
[00:31] | Oh, hello, Alex. | 你好啊 艾利克斯 |
[00:32] | Uh, let me go get you last night’s recordings. | 我去拿昨晚的录音给你 |
[00:34] | What recordings? | 什么录音 |
[00:36] | Well, you remember when you told me I talk in my sleep? | 还记得你跟我说过 我会说梦话吗 |
[00:38] | Well, it occurred to me that, like most things I say, | 然后我想到 梦话跟我平时说的话一样 |
[00:41] | it’s probably pure gold. | 含金量也应该超高的吧 |
[00:43] | So I started recording it all, | 所以我开始录音 |
[00:46] | and now Alex gets to comb through eight hours | 而现在艾利克斯得好好梳理下 |
[00:48] | of what I like to call “Sheldon After Dark.” | 我称为”谢家午夜论坛”的八小时长节目 |
[00:52] | – Hey, Leonard. – Hey. | -你好吗 莱纳德 -好啊 |
[00:53] | Just playing a little Giant Jenga here. | 我在玩巨型层层叠呢 |
[00:55] | Oh, I know– I’m the one who had to buy him the helmet. | 我知道啊 那顶安全帽就是我买的 |
[00:59] | So, do you have any plans this weekend? | 这周末你有什么安排吗 |
[01:01] | Well, most of Saturday’s gonna be figuring out | 周六估计大多数时间得花在思考 |
[01:03] | where to put this game when we’re done. | 这玩具玩完后收哪里 |
[01:05] | How about you? | 你呢 |
[01:06] | Oh, I’m gonna go see Kip Thorne | 我要去听基普·索恩博士的 |
[01:08] | give a lecture on subatomic space-time. | 亚原子时空讲座 |
[01:11] | That’s his take on John Wheeler’s quantum foam. | 他会讲述对约翰·惠勒的量子泡沫看法 |
[01:13] | That should be great. | 应该会很精彩 |
[01:14] | Well, if you want, you can come with me. | 有兴趣可以跟我一起去啊 |
[01:16] | Ah, I’d love to, but I’m supposed to hang out with Penny. | 我也想啊 可是我跟佩妮有约了 |
[01:19] | Well, bring her. | 带上她嘛 |
[01:20] | Well, she’s not really into that kind of stuff. | 她对这类事情没什么兴趣 |
[01:22] | Yeah, okay. | 那好吧 |
[01:24] | Well, if you want to hear about the lecture, | 那之后你对讲座内容有兴趣 |
[01:25] | I can tell you all about it at work, | 我可以上班时跟你说 |
[01:27] | or, you know, over dinner sometime. | 或者… 共进晚餐时跟你说哦 |
[01:29] | What? | 什么 |
[01:34] | Jenga, I win! | 你弄倒啦 我赢了 |
[02:07] | Oh, come on, that can’t be true. | 拜托 才不可能呢 |
[02:09] | I did the research– Tony the Tiger, | 我真查过了 托尼老虎 |
[02:12] | Dig’em the Frog, Cap’n Crunch, | 青蛙 克朗奇船长 |
[02:14] | Toucan Sam, Count Chocula, | 巨嘴鸟山姆 吸餐鬼伯爵 |
[02:16] | Trix the Rabbit, Snap, Crackle and Pop. | 崔克斯兔 卜卜米三兄弟 |
[02:19] | Not one cereal mascot is a girl. | 所有谷类早餐吉祥物都是男生 |
[02:24] | It’s a total breakfast sausage fest. | 谷物早餐界完全”基肠””露露”啊 |
[02:28] | Are we done with this? | 说完了吗 |
[02:29] | Almost– Franken Berry, Boo Berry, | 快了 红莓怪人 蓝莓鬼鬼 |
[02:32] | Sugar Bear and the Honey Nut Cheerio bee, | 糖糖熊 蜜果圈圈蜂 |
[02:34] | I believe his name is Buzz. | 他的名字是叫巴兹[嗡嗡声]吧 |
[02:37] | Terrific. | 很好很好 |
[02:38] | Something weird happened and I don’t know what to do about it. | 发生了一件怪事 我不知道该怎么办 |
[02:40] | What’s going on? | 怎么了 |
[02:41] | Sheldon’s assistant asked me on a date last night. | 谢尔顿的助理昨晚约我 |
[02:44] | How could you do that to me? | 你怎么可以这么对我 |
[02:45] | You know I’ve been working it with Alex for weeks. | 你明知道我泡她好一阵子了 |
[02:48] | Working it? You can’t even talk to her. | 你怎么泡人家 你连说话都不敢 |
[02:50] | I talk with my eyes. | 我用眼神跟她交流 |
[02:59] | You look like my little cousin | 我那个小表弟 |
[03:00] | when he’s dropping one in his diaper. | 在尿布里拉屎时就这眼神 |
[03:04] | She knows I have a girlfriend. | 她都知道我有女朋友了 |
[03:06] | It’s so weird. | 真是太神奇了 |
[03:07] | Oh, my God. You’re loving this. | 天啊 你居然还暗爽 |
[03:09] | To my bones. | 暗爽到爆啊 |
[03:13] | I mean, I’m not gonna do anything about it. I love Penny. | 我当然是不可能会对她下手啦 我爱佩妮 |
[03:15] | It’s just nice to have a young, attractive woman | 只是有个年轻貌美的女性 |
[03:18] | sniffing around the goods. | 对我有意思也很不错嘛 |
[03:20] | I both hate you and want to be you. | 我又恨你 又想当你 |
[03:23] | This is Ryan Gosling all over again. | 瑞恩·高斯林的事又重演了 |
[03:26] | Aw, gentlemen. | 各位同志 |
[03:27] | What is on the conversational menu this morning? | 今早的聊天话题选项有什么呢 |
[03:30] | Leonard stole my woman, and he knew full well | 莱纳德抢了我的妞 他明明知道 |
[03:32] | I was only six to eight months away from making my move. | 我只差六到八个月就要对她展开攻势了 |
[03:36] | I didn’t steal anyone. | 我才没抢走谁呢 |
[03:38] | Your assistant is totally hitting on this jerk | 你的助理明摆着对他有意思 |
[03:40] | and he loves it. | 他还暗爽 |
[03:41] | Well, that’s not acceptable. | 这样可不行 |
[03:43] | I’m her boss. | 我是她的老板 |
[03:45] | She needs to be solely focused on my needs, | 她只能关注以及满足我的需求 |
[03:47] | not distracted by your pasty, | 不该被你苍白无力 |
[03:49] | androgynous brand of sexuality. | 雌雄难辨的弱鸡阳气吸引 |
[03:54] | I’m androgynous? | 我怎么雌雄难辨了 |
[03:56] | Oh, please. Look at you | 拜托哦 你也不看看 |
[03:57] | with your pouty bee-stung lips. | 你那爱撅起的腊肠嘴 |
[04:01] | What do you guys think I should do? | 你们觉得我该怎么回应她 |
[04:02] | I say you tell Alex your heart belongs to Penny, | 我觉得你应该告诉她 你只爱佩妮 |
[04:05] | I provide her a shoulder to cry on, | 然后我借肩膀给她哭诉 |
[04:07] | and then roughly half a year later I give it to her good. | 然后差不多半年后 我就能给她”来一发”了 |
[04:13] | I want to thank you all for coming on such short notice. | 我要感谢你们能这么快就赶过来 |
[04:16] | Uh, in the past, I’ve reached out | 过去呢 我曾与在座各位 |
[04:18] | to each of you individually, | 有过单独请益的时刻 |
[04:20] | but I believe my present situation | 但这次我觉得这次的情况 |
[04:23] | requires the collective wisdom of the group, | 需要你们一起共同集思广益 |
[04:26] | which as you can see from your commemorative T-shirts | 想必你们从纪念T恤上也能看得出 |
[04:29] | I have dubbed | 我标注上了 |
[04:31] | Sheldon Cooper’s Council of Ladies. | 谢尔顿·库伯姐妹顾问团 |
[04:37] | What is happening? | 发生什么事了 |
[04:39] | I need your advice about a delicate workplace situation. | 我需要你们为一件敏感的职场关系给意见 |
[04:44] | Uh, to protect those involved, | 为了保护当事人隐私 |
[04:46] | I’ll be changing their names. | 我会替他们取假名 |
[04:48] | Who’s involved? | 当事人有谁啊 |
[04:49] | Well, a short, bespectacled colleague of mine | 我的一个活在他绝顶聪明的 |
[04:53] | who lives in the shadow of his brilliant roommate. | 室友光环之下的四眼鸡矮子同事 |
[04:56] | Let’s call this colleague Ricardo Shilly-Shally. | 这叫他”里卡多·谢利沙力”吧 |
[05:02] | You’re talking about Leonard. | 你是在说莱纳德 |
[05:04] | No, no, Shilly-Shally has red hair | 不不 谢利沙力有一头红发 |
[05:07] | and, uh, he briefly served in the Mexican Navy. | 他曾在墨西哥海军短期服役过 |
[05:14] | Anyway, despite the fact that he has a girlfriend, | 虽然他已经有一个女朋友 |
[05:17] | Shilly-Shally has been the recipient | 谢利沙力是遭年轻女性 |
[05:20] | of inappropriate workplace flirtations from a young lady. | 对他做不适宜的职场调戏的受方 |
[05:23] | – It’s your assistant Alex, isn’t it? – No. | -攻方就是你的助理艾利克斯吧 -不对 |
[05:27] | Not… No. This is Tondelaya Della Ventimiglia. | 才不是 是唐德莱娅·德拉·文蒂米利亚 |
[05:32] | Wait, what the hell’s going on with Leonard and Alex? | 等等 莱纳德跟艾利克斯到底是怎么回事 |
[05:35] | I’m sorry. Who’s talking about Leonard and Alex? | 抱歉 谁在说莱纳德和艾利克斯啊 |
[05:39] | Fine. Ricardo and Tondelaya. | 好吧 是里卡多和唐德莱娅 |
[05:41] | Okay, look, it’s not really about Ricardo and Tondelaya. | 其实我要说的重点不是里卡多和唐德莱娅 |
[05:44] | It is really about her boss, | 而是唐德莱娅的博士老板 |
[05:47] | who doesn’t quite know how to handle this situation | 他不知道该如何处理这种情况 |
[05:50] | and could use your advice, | 所以需要你们给出主意 |
[05:51] | which is surprising because Dr. Einstein Von Brainstorm… | 这有些反常 因为爱因斯坦·冯·集思广益博士 |
[05:57] | He’s usually pretty smart about these things. | 向来很会处理这种情况 |
[06:01] | I’m gonna kill her. | 我要杀了她 |
[06:02] | I’m sure you’ve got nothing to worry about. | 我相信你没什么好担心的 |
[06:03] | Leonard would never cheat on you. | 莱纳德绝对不会背叛你 |
[06:05] | She’s right. | 她说得对 |
[06:06] | But say the word– I got a lab | 但只要你开口 我有满满 |
[06:08] | full of cocaine-addicted monkeys with nothing to lose. | 一实验室不怕死的毒瘾疯猴 随时听候差遣 |
[06:12] | One of them could end up in the backseat of her car. | 可以扔一个进她的汽车后座 |
[06:16] | Or her shower. | 或是她的浴室 |
[06:19] | Ladies, ladies, please. | 女士们 女士们 拜托 |
[06:20] | We’re not here to talk about Penny, okay? | 我们不是来这里讨论佩妮的 好吗 |
[06:22] | We’re here to talk about me. | 我们是来讨论我的 |
[06:23] | Uh, I mean Einstein Von Brainst… Oh, darn it! | 我是说爱因斯坦·冯·集思… 我靠 |
[06:27] | All right, I guess the cat’s out of the bag. | 好吧 说溜嘴了 |
[06:29] | Let me explain what’s going on– | 那我就来解释下发生了什么事吧 |
[06:31] | Ricardo is really Leonard… | 里卡多其实是莱纳德… |
[06:32] | We know what’s going on, Sheldon! | 我们知道发生了什么事 谢尔顿 |
[06:36] | Well, what should I do? | 那我应该怎么做 |
[06:37] | Well, Alex is your employee. | 艾利克斯是你的员工 |
[06:39] | If she’s doing something that’s making Leonard uncomfortable, | 如果她做出一些让莱纳德觉得不舒服的事 |
[06:42] | you should talk to her. | 那你应该跟她谈谈 |
[06:43] | Oh, no, he’s not uncomfortable at all. | 不 他才没有不舒服呢 |
[06:45] | No, he’s loving it. | 他暗爽死了好吗 |
[06:46] | Yeah, he’s strutting around like he’s five-foot-six. | 对啊 他趾高气昂地好像自己有两米那么高 |
[06:50] | What… He’s loving it? | 什么 他很暗爽 |
[06:52] | Sheldon, you need to talk to Alex right away. | 谢尔顿 你得马上跟艾利克斯谈谈 |
[06:54] | Talk to her? That’s all you’ve got? | 谈谈 就只有这种建议啊 |
[06:56] | With a cool name like Sheldon Cooper’s Council of Ladies, | “谢尔顿·库伯姐妹顾问团”的名字这么牛气 |
[06:59] | I really expected more. | 我本来期望很高呢 |
[07:02] | Give me back the T-shirts. | 把T恤还我 |
[07:15] | Alex… | 艾利克斯 |
[07:16] | check my schedule. | 查下我的日程表 |
[07:18] | What does my afternoon look like? | 今天下午我有什么安排 |
[07:20] | I think it’s pretty wide open. | 我记得好像没有任何安排 |
[07:21] | Oh, wait. Here’s something at 4:00. | 慢着 四点有安排 |
[07:24] | “Give Alex a talking to”? | “跟艾利克斯谈谈” |
[07:29] | Well, that snuck up on us, didn’t it? | 这安排真是悄无声息出人意料啊 |
[07:31] | Is there a problem? | 有什么问题吗 |
[07:33] | Let’s not call it a problem. | 那其实不叫问题 |
[07:35] | Let’s call it an opportunity. | 我们应该称其为”机会” |
[07:37] | To solve a serious problem. | 一个解决严重问题的机会 |
[07:40] | What did I do? | 我做错什么了 |
[07:41] | You don’t know? Oh, you poor dear. | 你不知道吗 可怜的小宝贝 |
[07:44] | Your ovaries are squirting so much goofy juice | 你的卵巢把太多愚蠢分泌物 |
[07:46] | into your brains you don’t even know which way is up. | 都送到你脑子 害你人都傻了 |
[07:52] | You made an inappropriate sexual advance | 你对霍夫斯塔德博士做出 |
[07:55] | – towards Dr. Hofstadter. – What? | -不恰当的性企图 -什么 |
[07:57] | I didn’t make a sexual advance on anybody. | 我没有对任何人做任何性企图 |
[08:00] | Now, there’s no need to get defensive. | 别这么快就开始激动辩解 |
[08:03] | I’m not unsympathetic to your plight. | 我对你的情况表示同情 |
[08:05] | My father used to say that a woman | 我的父亲过去常说 女人就像 |
[08:08] | is like an egg salad sandwich on a warm Texas day. | 德州温暖天气中的鸡蛋沙拉三明治 |
[08:15] | What? | 什么意思 |
[08:17] | Full of eggs and only appealing for a short time. | 鸡蛋[卵子]满满 诱惑短短[容易坏] |
[08:22] | This conversation is making me uncomfortable. | 这次谈话让我觉得很不舒服 |
[08:24] | Yeah, you and me both, sister. | 不止你 我也是 妹妹 |
[08:26] | Now, | 现在 |
[08:29] | please understand… | 请你明白 |
[08:30] | I don’t hold you responsible for your behavior | 你的行为 我并不觉得是你的错 |
[08:34] | because, see, from an evolutionary standpoint, | 因为从进化的角度看 |
[08:36] | you’re a slave to your desire to reproduce. | 你不过是自身繁殖欲望的奴隶 |
[08:39] | But during the work day, | 但在工作时间 |
[08:41] | when you feel possessed by amorous intent, | 当你觉得自己有求欢的意图时 |
[08:44] | may I suggest that you suppress it | 我能否建议你 |
[08:46] | by leafing through this illustrated book | 通过翻阅这本性传播疾病的绘本 |
[08:49] | of sexually transmitted diseases? | 来抑制住你的欲望 |
[08:51] | Let’s see here. Oh, yes. | 我们看一下 就这页 |
[08:54] | Check out this oozy doozy. | 你看看这张小恶心图片 |
[08:58] | I have to go. | 我要走了 |
[09:00] | So does this fellow, | 这位仁兄也是 |
[09:01] | but he can’t without it burning like hot soup. | 但他走不了 他那里就跟热汤那样烧得慌 |
[09:10] | Hey, pretty lady. | 嗨 美女 |
[09:13] | Oh, you seem extra happy. | 你看起来格外开心啊 |
[09:15] | Uh, I guess I am. | 应该是吧 |
[09:16] | Any particular reason why? | 有什么特别的原因吗 |
[09:18] | Mm, I don’t know, just having a good day. | 不知道 就是今天过得还不错 |
[09:20] | This morning Sheldon fell asleep on the way to work, | 早上谢尔顿在去上班的路上睡着了 |
[09:22] | so I got to listen to the radio– | 所以我有机会听广播 |
[09:23] | that was pretty crazy. | 好疯狂的一早 |
[09:26] | Anything else? | 还有别的吗 |
[09:27] | I found this quiz online called | 我在网上发现一个小测试 |
[09:29] | “Which Star Trek Character Are You?” | 名叫”测测你是星际迷航中的谁” |
[09:30] | and it only took me four tries to get Captain Kirk. | 我测了四次 终于测到柯克船长[角色] |
[09:34] | That’s great. | 很好啊 |
[09:35] | Oh. It. Was. | 的确如此 |
[09:40] | Well, I’m glad you’re having such a great day. | 很高兴你今天过得这么开心 |
[09:42] | And the one thing that could make it even better | 还有一件让我更开心的事就是 |
[09:45] | is an evening with my special girl. | 晚上要跟我特别的姑娘约会 |
[09:47] | Oh, and who’s that? | 哪一个啊 |
[09:48] | What do you mean? | 这话什么意思 |
[09:50] | Oh, I just didn’t know if you meant me or Alex. | 我不知道特别的姑娘 是指我还是艾利克斯 |
[09:52] | Um, why would I mean Alex? | 为什么会指艾利克斯 |
[09:54] | Because I know she hit on you | 因为我知道她对你有意思 |
[09:56] | and I know you liked it! | 而且我还知道你很暗爽 |
[09:58] | What…? | 哪里…有 |
[10:01] | Don’t play dumb with me, Ricardo Shilly-Shally! | 别跟老娘装傻 里卡多·谢利沙力 |
[10:11] | I’m missing something. | 我是不是漏了什么事 |
[10:14] | Did you say something to Penny about Alex? | 你是不是跟佩妮说了艾利克斯的事 |
[10:17] | Oh, yes. Yeah, and a fat lot of good it did me. | 没错 而且还得到了”很多帮助”呢 |
[10:21] | All she did was get mad at you. | “帮助”就是她光顾着生你的气了 |
[10:25] | Why would you do that? | 你为什么要这样做 |
[10:27] | I needed advice about a woman. | 我需要关于女人的建议 |
[10:29] | I would have asked you, | 我本来可以问你的 |
[10:30] | but if the last few years have proven anything, | 但要说过去几年证明了什么 |
[10:32] | it’s that you can’t tell a uterus from a unicycle. | 那就是你连子宫和独轮车都分不清 |
[10:36] | At least I know not to blab to a girl | 至少我知道随便对女生透露 |
[10:38] | about somebody flirting with her boyfriend. | 有人追她男友是不对的 |
[10:41] | Good to know. | 知道这个太好了 |
[10:42] | Yeah, a few more helpful hints like that, | 你再多说点这类的金玉良言 |
[10:44] | you may find yourself on the Council of Ladies. | 就可以名正言顺地加入姐妹顾问团了 |
[10:47] | Hello. | 你好 |
[10:48] | I see. | 这样啊 |
[10:51] | Uh, what time? | 几点 |
[10:53] | Very well, then. | 好的 |
[10:56] | That was the Human Resources Department at the university. | 是学校的人事部打来的 |
[11:00] | Apparently, my assistant Alex has filed a complaint | 我的助理艾利克斯居然投诉了我 |
[11:03] | accusing me of inappropriate behavior in the workplace. | 说我在办公场所有不当行为 |
[11:07] | Oh, my God, what did you do? | 老天啊 你做了什么 |
[11:09] | Hmm, let me think. | 我回忆一下 |
[11:13] | Nothing. I’m a delight. | 没什么啊 我超萌超有爱的 |
[11:26] | Human Resources Department. | 人事部 |
[11:28] | Human Resources Department. | 人事部 |
[11:30] | Human Resources Department. | 人事部 |
[11:33] | Come in. | 请进 |
[11:36] | Hello. | 你好 |
[11:37] | Ah, Dr. Cooper, have a seat. | 是你啊 库珀博士 请坐吧 |
[11:39] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[11:40] | I called you in today because your assistant | 我今天叫你来是因为你的助理 |
[11:42] | Alex Jensen has lodged a complaint against you. | 艾利克斯·詹森投诉了你 |
[11:45] | So I’ve been told. | 我听说了 |
[11:46] | But I can’t understand what she has to complain about. | 但我不明白她有什么可抱怨的 |
[11:49] | I mean, she has a front-row seat as I make scientific history. | 她处在见证我改写科学界历史的最前线 |
[11:53] | There’s string cheese in my mini-fridge, | 我的迷你冰箱里随时备有奶酪棒 |
[11:55] | and that’s for anyone. | 大家都可以享用 |
[11:58] | Yeah, and just yesterday | 而且就在昨天 |
[11:59] | I led her away from a life of sexual promiscuity | 我向她展示染上妇科病的生殖器图片 |
[12:02] | by making her look at pictures of disease-ridden genitalia. | 指引她走出了淫乱的歧途 |
[12:12] | Cancel my next appointment. | 取消下一位的面谈 |
[12:15] | This is gonna take a while. | 这位估计得耗点时间 |
[12:17] | Dr. Cooper, | 库珀博士 |
[12:18] | you said things to your employee | 你对你的下属 |
[12:20] | that you just cannot say in the workplace. | 说了在职场上不应该说的话 |
[12:23] | Like what? | 比如什么 |
[12:24] | Well, according to Ms. Jensen, | 据詹森女士说 |
[12:26] | you said that she was a slave to her biological urges | 你说她是自己生理需求的奴隶 |
[12:29] | and called her an “egg salad sandwich.” | 并且称呼她为”鸡蛋沙拉三明治” |
[12:36] | I don’t even know what that means, | 虽然我不知道那是什么比喻 |
[12:38] | but I’m gonna go ahead and tell you you can’t say it. | 但我告诉你 说那种话是不行的 |
[12:42] | Oh! I see the confusion here. | 我明白怎么会有误会了 |
[12:45] | No, no, Alex thought I was singling her out. No. | 艾利克斯以为我在针对她 不是这样的 |
[12:48] | I meant that all women | 我的意思是所有女人 |
[12:51] | are slaves to their biological urges, you know? | 都是自己生理需求的奴隶 |
[12:53] | Even you. | 你也一样 |
[12:57] | You’re a slave. | 你是个奴隶 |
[13:03] | I’m a what? | 我是什么来着 |
[13:05] | Well, y-you… I-I’m just saying, you know, | 我的意思是 |
[13:08] | at a certain point in a woman’s menstrual cycle… | 在女性生理周期的某一时刻 |
[13:10] | Whuh-ah! | 停停停 |
[13:12] | You can’t talk about that, either, Dr. Cooper. | 这也是你不能谈论的 库珀博士 |
[13:14] | Your language is entirely inappropriate, | 你的语言非常不恰当 |
[13:16] | and I’m gonna advise that you shut your mouth right now. | 我建议立刻给我闭嘴 |
[13:19] | I d… I don’t see why I’m the one being persecuted here. | 我真不明白被指责的怎么会是我 |
[13:22] | Dr. Hofstadter– he was bragging about | 霍夫斯塔德博士 每抓到一个听众 |
[13:25] | his sexual desirability to anyone who would listen. | 他就要炫耀自己有多风靡女性万千 |
[13:28] | You know, and Howard Wolowitz– | 还有霍华德·沃罗威茨 |
[13:29] | he spent two years using university resources | 他花了两年时间 利用学校的资源 |
[13:32] | building a six-breasted sex robot. | 制造了一个六乳性爱机器人 |
[13:35] | And at the office Christmas party, | 我还在部门的圣诞派对里 |
[13:37] | I heard Rajesh Koothrappali | 听到拉杰什·库萨帕里 |
[13:39] | refer to you several times as “brown sugar.” | 好几次称你为”棕糖美妞” |
[13:44] | Hofstadter… | 霍夫斯塔德 |
[13:46] | Wolowitz… | 沃罗威茨 |
[13:47] | and the last one was Rajesh Koothrappali? | 最后一个是拉杰什·库萨帕里 |
[13:50] | Yes. | 是的 |
[13:51] | No, yeah, but in his defense, | 对 但我得为他澄清一下 |
[13:53] | that wasn’t racist. | 他不是对你有种族歧视 |
[13:54] | He’s also brown. | 他也是棕皮肤人种 |
[14:03] | * Sorry Alex hit on me * | * 抱歉艾利克斯喜欢我 * |
[14:07] | * Hit on me * | * 喜欢我 * |
[14:09] | * Hit on me * | * 喜欢我 * |
[14:12] | * Sorry Alex hit on me * | * 抱歉艾利克斯喜欢我 * |
[14:14] | * I’d no idea I’m cute * | * 我不知道自己很讨喜 * |
[14:22] | Oh, damn it, you are. | 可恶 你确实讨喜 |
[14:24] | Please forgive me. | 原谅我吧 |
[14:25] | I should have told you about Alex. | 我应该早点告诉你艾利克斯的事 |
[14:27] | I don’t care about Alex. | 我不在乎她 |
[14:29] | Fine, I care. | 好吧 我在乎 |
[14:30] | Okay, I hate that bitch. | 好吧 我讨厌那小贱人 |
[14:33] | But what really hurt is that you liked it so much. | 但你竟然那么暗爽 太让我难过了 |
[14:35] | I mean, do I need to be worried? | 我需要担心你变心吗 |
[14:37] | Of course not. No. Why? | 当然不用啦 担心什么啊 |
[14:39] | Because…she is pretty and smart, | 因为她又漂亮又聪明 |
[14:41] | and when you talk about work, she doesn’t have to go home | 你们要是谈论工作的东西 她不必跑回家 |
[14:43] | and look up words in the dictionary to understand what you said. | 翻翻字典才能理解你在说什么 |
[14:47] | – You do that? – No. | -你会那样做啊 -才不会 |
[14:51] | Hang on. Are you feeling insecure? | 等一下 你是没有安全感吗 |
[14:53] | Because that’s my thing, | 那可是我专属的事 |
[14:54] | and if you take it away, | 要是你把这个活抢走了 |
[14:55] | I don’t know what I’m bringing to this relationship. | 那我们的关系之中 我就贡献不出东西了 |
[14:58] | Yes, Leonard, I am insecure. | 对 莱纳德 我没安全感 |
[15:01] | – Happy? – No, | -开心吗 -不 |
[15:02] | I’m not happy. | 不开心 |
[15:09] | – Why are you smiling? – I’m sorry. | -那你干嘛笑 -对不起嘛 |
[15:11] | I just never think of you having feelings like that. | 我从没想过你会有这种感觉 |
[15:14] | – Well, I do. – Why? | -我有的 -为什么呢 |
[15:15] | Nothing is ever going to happen between me and Alex. | 我和艾利克斯绝对没可能 |
[15:19] | Good. | 很好 |
[15:21] | Come here. | 过来 |
[15:26] | – I’ll tell you a secret? – What’s that? | -告诉你个秘密吧 -什么 |
[15:28] | With all these women chasing me, | 有这么多姑娘追我 |
[15:30] | I kind of do feel like Captain Kirk. | 我觉得自己好像柯克船长 |
[15:33] | – Can I tell you a secret? – Sure. | -我也能说个秘密吗 -当然 |
[15:35] | Keep talking about Captain Kirk, | 继续说什么柯克船长吧 |
[15:37] | and we’re all gonna stop. | 估计我们撑得过今天撑不过明天 |
[15:40] | Message… received. | 信息 已收到[模仿柯克船长] |
[15:46] | Ah, excuse me. | 不好意思 |
[15:49] | Hello. | 你好 |
[15:51] | This is Dr. Hofstadter. | 我是霍夫斯塔德博士 |
[15:54] | Okay. | 好的 |
[15:57] | All right, thank you. | 知道了 谢谢 |
[16:00] | That’s weird. | 奇了怪了 |
[16:01] | I’m getting called in to Human Resources. | 人事部叫我过去一趟 |
[16:05] | What did you do? | 你做了什么了 |
[16:07] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
[16:09] | I just got called in to Human Resources. | 人事部刚刚叫我过去一趟 |
[16:14] | – Why? – I don’t know. | -为什么 -不知道 |
[16:18] | That is so strange. | 真是太奇怪了 |
[16:20] | Human Resources wants to talk to me tomorrow. | 人事部叫我明天过去一趟 |
[16:22] | Could you stop licking your ass for two minutes? | 你能不能停下”孤菊自舔”两分钟啊 |
[16:24] | I have a problem here. | 老子现在有麻烦 |
[16:36] | Do you really think you should be drinking right now? | 你真觉得现在是喝酒的好时机吗 |
[16:39] | How else am I supposed to talk to the Human Resources lady? | 不然我等会怎么回答人事部小姐的问题 |
[16:43] | I don’t know. Seek professional help? | 不知道 看心理医生怎么样 |
[16:46] | I did. The guy at the liquor store said | 我有啊 酒类专卖店的人说 |
[16:48] | this stuff tastes great in coffee. | 这玩意配咖啡口感不错 |
[16:52] | Wait, you got called in, too? | 等下 你也被召来了吗 |
[16:54] | What is going on? | 出什么事了 |
[16:55] | Sheldon threw us all under the bus. | 谢尔顿把我们都拉来陪葬了 |
[16:58] | I feel like I’ve been called down to the principal’s office. | 我感觉自己像是见校长的坏学生 |
[17:00] | Although I wouldn’t mind if Brown Sugar suspended me. | 不过我可不介意被”棕糖美妞”打屁屁 |
[17:05] | From a sex swing! | 还是在性爱秋千上打哦 |
[17:09] | This may have been a mistake. | 喝酒可能是个错误决定 |
[17:12] | Relax. Everything’s gonna be fine. | 放轻松 没事的 |
[17:15] | You know, before I met Bernadette | 要知道在我碰到伯纳黛特前 |
[17:16] | I was in here every other day. | 我是这里三天两头报到的常客 |
[17:19] | Uh, little tip: | 友情提示下 |
[17:20] | turn off your “I Like Big Butts” ringtone before you go in. | 进去前先把”我喜欢大屁妞”的铃声调成静音 |
[17:25] | Well, this is all your fault. | 这都是你的错 |
[17:27] | How is this my fault? | 怎么成我的错了 |
[17:29] | If you weren’t screwing around with Sheldon’s assistant, | 如果你没和谢尔顿的助理鬼混 |
[17:30] | none of this would be happening. | 根本不会发生现在这种破事 |
[17:31] | I wasn’t screwing around with anyone. | 我才没跟任何人鬼混 |
[17:33] | Oh, of course not. | 是哦 没有 |
[17:34] | She was just sniffing around your goods | 那你是想说 她在”闻你的货时” |
[17:36] | because she was hunting for truffles. | 只是单纯在找松露而已吗[靠猪的嗅觉找] |
[17:39] | Ah, Mr. Wolowitz, it’s been a while. | 沃罗威茨先生 好久不见 |
[17:42] | Hey, Janine. | 你好 洁宁 |
[17:44] | How are Tom and the kids? | 汤姆和孩子们好吗 |
[17:46] | Fine. | 很好 |
[17:47] | You must be Dr. Hofstadter. | 你一定是霍夫斯塔德博士吧 |
[17:49] | Yes, but I think this is all a big misunderstanding. | 是 但我想这是个天大的误会 |
[17:52] | Yeah, yeah, me, too. | 你也误会我了 |
[17:53] | I didn’t do anything. | 我什么都没干 |
[17:55] | Is that alcohol on your breath? | 你怎么说话满嘴酒气 |
[17:56] | Howard built a sex robot. | 霍华德造了个性爱机器人 |
[18:03] | That is not true. | 没有这回事 |
[18:04] | All I did was build a robot. | 我就只是造了个机器人而已 |
[18:06] | Did it have six breasts? | 你那个机器人有六个胸吗 |
[18:08] | I’m sorry, I’m a feminist– | 抱歉 我是个尊重男女平等的人 |
[18:11] | I don’t notice things like | 我不会特别注意 |
[18:12] | how many breasts a robot has. | 机器人有多少乳房这种事 |
[18:15] | Well, hello. | 大家好 |
[18:18] | What are you doing here? | 你来干嘛 |
[18:19] | Actually, I came to speak to Mrs. Davis. | 我是来找戴维斯夫人的 |
[18:21] | And I’m a little busy right now. | 我现在有点忙 |
[18:22] | But I came to file a complaint. | 我是来投诉的 |
[18:24] | Yeah, somebody has made me feel uncomfortable in the workplace | 有人在工作场所通过用不当的 |
[18:27] | by using language of an inappropriate and sexual nature. | 和带性字眼的言语骚扰我 让我觉得不适 |
[18:30] | And who was that? | 是谁呢 |
[18:32] | You, you dirty birdie. | 就你啊 你这色色的婆娘 |
[18:36] | I-I thought about the things you said to me yesterday, | 我回想了下你昨天跟我说过的话 |
[18:38] | and I realized I’m deeply offended. | 我意识到那是对我深深的冒犯 |
[18:39] | Now, be a dear and get me one of those complaint forms. | 现在乖乖去给本大爷拿投诉表来 |
[18:43] | That’s it. | 够了 |
[18:44] | All of you, in my office now! | 所有人 马上进我办公室 |
[18:50] | And thanks to you, I know better than to ask | 多亏你的”教导” 我不至于傻到问 |
[18:52] | if you’re menstruating. | 你是不是来”大姨妈”了 |
[18:57] | And based on your behavior, I don’t have to. | 而看你这狂躁样 不问也知道 |
[19:03] | It has been pointed out to me that… | 经过训示后 我才明白 |
[19:06] | some of the things I said to you | 我对你说的某些话 |
[19:08] | could be construed as… offensive, | 可能会被理解成 无礼 |
[19:11] | and I would like to offer you | 我愿意向你表达 |
[19:15] | my sincerest apology. | 我最真诚的歉意 |
[19:17] | – Thank you, Dr. Cooper. – Yeah, additionally, | -谢谢 库珀博士 -另外 |
[19:19] | you should know that the university has mandated | 跟你说下 校方要求我 |
[19:22] | that I take an online sexual harassment seminar | 参加在线性骚扰研讨班 |
[19:26] | so this sort of thing doesn’t happen in the future. | 这样以后不会再发生类似的事情 |
[19:29] | – Okay. – Yeah. Now, | -好的 -现在 |
[19:31] | unfortunately, uh, my time is much too valuable | 遗憾的是 我的时间太过宝贵 |
[19:35] | to waste on nonsense like this, | 不能浪费在这种屁事上面 |
[19:37] | so… um, I’m gonna need you to take it for me. | 所以 我需要你替我考过这个测试 |
[19:44] | Oh, and, uh, you’d better ace it– | 还有 你最好给我得个A |
[19:46] | they’re pretty mad. | 因为校方还挺生气的 |
[19:57] | So, hey, I was thinking about that stuff with Alex. | 我一直在想你和艾利克斯的事 |
[19:59] | Oh, would you stop worrying about that? | 拜托你别再为这个烦心了 |
[20:01] | I can’t help it. But, look, I figured | 我也没办法 但我想着 |
[20:03] | I could sit around and feel insecure, | 我可以不作为 一直觉得没安全感 |
[20:05] | or I could do something about it. | 或者也可以做出行动 |
[20:06] | So I got a course catalog at school | 所以我拿了学校的课程表 |
[20:08] | and looked at some of the science classes. | 看下了科学类课程 |
[20:11] | That’s great. | 太好了 |
[20:11] | No, it isn’t– they are extremely boring. | 一点也不好 那些课都闷死了 |
[20:13] | I mean, how do you not kill yourself, like, every day? | 你怎么撑到现在还没有自杀 |
[20:18] | Anyway, I decided I don’t need to be a scientist, | 话说回来 我觉得我没必要做科学家 |
[20:20] | I could just look like one. | 我只要看起来像就行 |
[20:22] | So I bought these. | 所以我买了这个 |
[20:24] | Glasses? | 眼镜 |
[20:26] | I really don’t think that’s gonna change– | 我不觉得这会有什么帮助… |
[20:27] | oh, my God, | 我的天啊 |
[20:28] | you look so smart and hot! | 你看起来真是聪明绝顶兼性感撩人 |
[20:31] | I know, right? Watch this. | 我知道 瞧好啦 |
[20:39] | Molecules. | 分子 |
[20:43] | Okay, come with me. | 跟我来吧 |
[20:44] | – Where are we going? – To my bedroom, | -去哪里 -我的卧室 |
[20:45] | so I can take everything off but those glasses… | 这样我可以扒光你除了眼镜外的一切衣物 |
[20:49] | and maybe the boots. | 靴子也留着好了 |