| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Okay, now holding sides of hearth in position, | 抓住壁炉两侧 固定好位置 |
| [00:04] | lower mantelpiece assembly onto top tabs. | 将壁炉台组合至壁炉上方 |
| [00:09] | Look at that, I built a fireplace with my own two hands. | 你看 我靠着自己这双手造了个壁炉呢 |
| [00:13] | You’re so butch. | 你好龙精虎猛哦 |
| [00:15] | Aw, I got a little paper cut. | 哎哟 被纸割伤手了 |
| [00:17] | Of course you did. | 完全不意外 |
| [00:19] | Your hands are softer than veal. | 你的芊芊玉手比小牛肉还嫩呢 |
| [00:22] | Oh, before I forget, Saturday I’m planning a little | 趁我没忘 提醒你一下 这周六 |
| [00:25] | Dungeons and Dragons night with the guys. | 我约了大家玩《龙与地下城》哦 |
| [00:26] | Really? That’s how you’re gonna spend your Saturday night? | 真的吗 周六晚你就打算这么庆祝啊 |
| [00:29] | Oh, come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play anymore. | 别这样 我几乎都没什么机会玩了 |
| [00:31] | Oh, you poor thing. | 你个可怜的娃 |
| [00:32] | Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you | 有个真实存在还能滚床单的女朋友 |
| [00:34] | getting in the way of your board games? | 碍着你跟你心爱的小桌游嬉戏了吗 |
| [00:38] | Little bit, yeah. | 是有一点啦 |
| [00:42] | Oh, great! I’ve always wanted to play Dungeons and Dragons. | 好耶 我一直都想玩玩看《龙与地下城》呢 |
| [00:45] | Yeah, oh, I’m sorry. | 抱歉 是我不好 |
| [00:46] | I should’ve mentioned this earlier. | 我应该先说在前头 |
| [00:48] | You’re not invited. | 你未被邀请 |
| [00:52] | Why not? | 为什么没有啊 |
| [00:53] | Amy, from time to time, | 艾米 每隔一段时间 |
| [00:55] | we men need to break free from the shackles of civility | 我们男人都需要挣脱文明礼仪的束缚 |
| [01:00] | and get in touch with our primal animalistic selves. | 并回归原始野性的自我 |
| [01:04] | By rolling dice | 就掷掷骰子 |
| [01:05] | and playing make-believe with little figurines? | 然后用小人偶玩幻想游戏也算啊 |
| [01:07] | Yeah, like a bunch of savages. | 是啊 又野蛮又粗暴啊 |
| [01:12] | Saturday night? | 周六晚啊 |
| [01:13] | But I’ve been working late all week. | 我这周天天都加班 |
| [01:15] | That was gonna be our night. | 还想着那晚能是二人时光呢 |
| [01:16] | But I have to go. | 我不去不行啊 |
| [01:17] | We play as a group. | 我们大家要一起玩啊 |
| [01:18] | If-if I’m not there, then everyone will blame you. | 要是我去不成 其他人会说你坏话的 |
| [01:21] | They’ll be all, “Bernadette ruined everything. | 他们就会说 “伯纳黛特超扫兴 |
| [01:24] | She’s the worst.” | 她个臭八婆” |
| [01:27] | So, you see? | 你理解吗 |
| [01:28] | I have to play Dungeons and Dragons… | 我不能不去玩《龙与地下城》啊 |
| [01:32] | for the marriage. | 是为我们婚姻着想 |
| [01:35] | You’re an idiot. | 你个死白痴 |
| [01:38] | I’m your idiot. | 是你的小白痴 |
| [01:39] | Forever. | 死都甩不掉哦 |
| [01:42] | So, listen, I know we talked about | 听我说 我们之前的确是说了 |
| [01:45] | getting a bite to eat in Silver Lake, | 要去银湖吃吃东西 |
| [01:47] | and then seeing the Christmas lights in Griffith Park, | 然后去格里菲斯公园看看圣诞灯饰 |
| [01:49] | but Leonard’s talking about a big D and D game at his place. | 可莱纳德找我们去他家玩《龙与地下城》呢 |
| [01:53] | Saturday night just went from crazy to epic! | 周六夜要从嗨翻升级成史诗级啦 |
| [02:26] | All right, Sheldon, to start our quest, | 谢尔顿 要想开始征途 |
| [02:29] | you need to open this little Christmas gift I got you. | 你必须先打开我送你的这圣诞礼物 |
| [02:32] | A Christmas gift? | 圣诞礼物啊 |
| [02:34] | You know I don’t enjoy Christmas. | 你明知道我不爱圣诞节 |
| [02:37] | What’s wrong with Christmas? | 圣诞节有什么不好啊 |
| [02:38] | Oh, where to begin? | 太多缺点 不知从何开始 |
| [02:40] | Trees indoors. | 室内摆树 |
| [02:42] | Overuse of the words “’tis” and “’twas.” | 猛拽古文 例如”此乃”圣诞佳节 |
| [02:45] | And the absurd custom of one stocking. | 还有这荒谬的单脚袜习俗 |
| [02:48] | Everyone knows socks belong in pairs. | 是人都知道 袜子就该成双成对 |
| [02:51] | Who uses one sock? | 谁会要单脚袜啊 |
| [02:53] | Pirate with a peg leg? | 一只脚是木制假腿的海盗吧 |
| [02:55] | Actually that helps, thank you. | 有用处我就舒服多了 谢啦 |
| [02:58] | Would you just look inside? | 就赶紧看里面有啥嘛 |
| [03:01] | Oh, a scroll. | 是个卷轴 |
| [03:03] | I like scrolls. | 我最爱卷轴了 |
| [03:05] | They’re my third favorite system of | 卷轴是我第三喜爱的 |
| [03:06] | transmitting the written word. | 文字传输方式 |
| [03:09] | After stone tablets and skywriting. | 仅在石碑与飞机空中文字之后 |
| [03:13] | “You have all been summoned to join | “在座各位皆是被召唤来参与 |
| [03:14] | a thrilling Dungeons and Dragons adventure. | 紧张刺激的《龙与地下城》冒险的人选 |
| [03:17] | Your quest begins in | 你们踏上征途的起因 |
| [03:18] | a secret northern village of elves | 是由于一个神秘的北方小精灵村庄 |
| [03:21] | who have all been massacred.” | 被人血洗屠村” |
| [03:22] | I like where this is heading. | 这故事走向我喜欢 |
| [03:25] | “Your task is to rescue their leader | “你们的任务是要营救 |
| [03:27] | from a dungeon of ogres.” | 被困于食人魔地下城的村长” |
| [03:29] | Oh, that’s a saucy twist. | 好妙的故事转折啊 |
| [03:31] | “That leader’s name: | “而村长的名字是… |
| [03:32] | Santa Claus”” | 圣诞老人” |
| [03:33] | No, no, no! | 不 不 不啊 |
| [03:37] | It’s actually, “Ho, ho, ho,” | 圣诞老人是”呵 呵 呵”的笑 |
| [03:37] | but you’ll get the hang of it. | 你再多练练就会了 |
| [03:40] | Thought it’d be fun to make | 我觉得把节日混合入任务里 |
| [03:41] | a quest with a holiday theme. | 会很有意思嘛 |
| [03:43] | Fun? | 有意思吗 |
| [03:44] | Mixing Dungeons and Dragons with Christmas is | 把《龙与地下城》跟圣诞节混合起来 |
| [03:46] | like making a sandwich of grape jelly, | 就像是做三明治 把最好吃的果冻 |
| [03:48] | the best-tasting jelly, | 葡萄果冻 |
| [03:49] | and petroleum jelly, the worst-tasting jelly. | 跟最难吃的果冻 石化制果冻混一起 |
| [03:54] | Okay, here we go. | 好了 开始啦 |
| [03:55] | “You find yourselves | “你们发现自己 |
| [03:57] | in the smoking remains of Santa’s village. | 身处于圣诞村烟雾弥漫的废墟之中 |
| [03:59] | Clearly, a great battle has taken place.” | 显然 此地刚发生过一场大战” |
| [04:02] | Oh, man, the first monster I see, | 好兴奋啊 第一个怪物露头 |
| [04:03] | I’m gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand, | 我要潜到他背后 掏出我的小魔棒 |
| [04:06] | and shoot my magic all over his ass. | 用我的魔法射满他菊花 |
| [04:12] | Do you hear yourself when you say these things? | 你说出这些话时 自己有听到吗 |
| [04:16] | Okay, there are ogre tracks and a trail of | 在雪地上发现了食人魔足印 |
| [04:18] | broken candy canes in the snow. | 还有用拐杖糖碎块留下的路线线索 |
| [04:20] | Sheldon, what do you do? | 谢尔顿 你采取什么行动 |
| [04:21] | I signal my contempt for your cruel plan | 我选择这你残酷 没人性 |
| [04:23] | to shove Christmas joy down my throat | 硬逼我庆祝圣诞节计划 |
| [04:25] | by making a gesture that says, “get a load of this guy.” | 以”你们瞧这二货”的言语来加以鄙视 |
| [04:30] | Fine. Howard, what do you do? | 行 霍华德 你采取什么行动 |
| [04:32] | I follow the ogre tracks, | 我选择跟随食人魔足印 |
| [04:34] | checking for secret doors along the way. | 并在跟踪时 检查路上有无暗门密道 |
| [04:38] | And you discover a secret door leading to a dark corridor. | 你发现了一个门后是阴暗走廊的暗门 |
| [04:41] | Okay, guys, let’s make a plan: | 兄弟们 先布置好计划 |
| [04:42] | spell casters in the back, warriors in the front… | 战士走前排 法师站后排 |
| [04:44] | No, screw that noise, I’m going in. | 少废话 老子要杀进去了 |
| [04:46] | Hang on, Santa, I’m coming for you! | 圣诞老人 撑着点 我来救你了 |
| [04:50] | Okay, you run into a room full of weapons, | 你跑进了一件兵器房里 |
| [04:54] | hit a trip wire… | 触发了陷阱 |
| [04:57] | …a cannon blows your face off, you die, you’re out of the game. | 一门大炮炸飞了你的头 角色死亡 你出局了 |
| [05:01] | But… a canon? | 等等 一门大炮啊 |
| [05:03] | Am I really out of the game? | 我真的出局了吗 |
| [05:05] | Lucky. | 你真幸运 |
| [05:08] | Okay, come on, moving on. | 好了 游戏继续进行 |
| [05:09] | Wait, doesn’t anyone have a rod of resurrection? | 等等 你们身上都没有复活之棒吗 |
| [05:12] | Because if you’ve got one, I need it bad. | 你们谁有 我急需这跟小棒棒啊 |
| [05:17] | Get in here with your rod and give it to me. | 赶紧掏出你的棒棒 给人家来一棒嘛 |
| [05:21] | Okay, you need to say these things | 好吧 你说话之前 |
| [05:22] | in your head before you say them out loud. | 得把原话在脑子里好好过一遍 |
| [05:27] | Hey, guys. | 伙计们 |
| [05:28] | I don’t mean to interrupt your little game, | 我不是故意打断你们的小游戏 |
| [05:29] | but I thought you’d like to see what you’re missing out on. | 但我觉得你们会想知道 自己都错过了啥 |
| [05:32] | So… | 那么… |
| [05:33] | Bernadette? | 伯纳黛特 |
| [05:41] | Bernadette’s wearing leopard-print pumps | 伯纳黛特脚踩豹纹高跟鞋 |
| [05:42] | and a rack-tastic red dress from Forever 21. | 身穿爆乳红裙 均购自”永远21″ |
| [05:52] | And there’s Amy, | 接下来是艾米 |
| [05:53] | showing all kinds of ankle. | 与她的露”脚踝”装 |
| [05:56] | In an outfit I’m assuming is from Forever 63. | 身上那件衣服 我估计是购自”永远63″吧 |
| [06:02] | And I, myself… | 而我自己呢… |
| [06:06] | …am wearing a little number that got me | 穿着一条小码紧身裙 我可是靠它 |
| [06:08] | out of two speeding tickets and jury duty. | 免了两张超速罚单和陪审员的义务 |
| [06:12] | I know they’re making a rhetorical point, | 我知道她们是用夸张手法来表达某事 |
| [06:13] | I just don’t know what it is. | 可我真看不出是说什么事 |
| [06:16] | See you, boys. We are going drinking. | 再见 伙计们 我们要去喝酒啦 |
| [06:17] | Uh, wait, can I come with you? | 等等 我能跟你们一起去吗 |
| [06:19] | My character died. | 我玩的角色死了 |
| [06:22] | Sorry, Raj, it’s girls’ night out. | 抱歉 拉杰 今晚是闺蜜之夜 |
| [06:24] | Maybe another time. | 或许下次吧 |
| [06:28] | Okay… | 好吧 |
| [06:30] | Come on. | 走吧 |
| [06:33] | Girls’ night, girls’ night! | 闺蜜之夜 闺蜜之夜 |
| [06:39] | How does he not hear that? | 他怎么会听不到自己说这种话呢 |
| [06:44] | So, what’s the plan? | 有什么大计 |
| [06:45] | Are we gonna teach our fellas a lesson | 我们要不要给各自的男友一点教训 |
| [06:46] | by getting stinking drunk, | 喝个酩酊大醉 |
| [06:48] | luring strange men into the bathroom, | 勾引陌生男人到厕所 |
| [06:50] | and turning the toilet stall into a temple of the senses? | 把厕所隔间变成性爱感官神殿 |
| [06:54] | – No! – No! | -不要 -当然不 |
| [06:55] | Geez, who’s Forever 63 now? | 天啊 现在谁才是”永远63″啊 |
| [07:00] | Can we get another bottle of champagne for the table? | 能给我们桌再来一瓶香槟吗 |
| [07:02] | Don’t worry. | 别担心 |
| [07:03] | It’s my treat. | 我请客 |
| [07:04] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [07:05] | You should come to girls’ night more often. | 你应该多来参加我们的闺蜜之夜 |
| [07:07] | And not just because if you weren’t here, | 绝不是因为如果你不在 |
| [07:09] | this would be a can of Pabst. | 我们就要从喝香槟沦落为喝啤酒哦 |
| [07:11] | My pleasure; nothing makes me happier | 这是我的荣幸 能有机会宠溺女人 |
| [07:13] | than the chance to spoil a lady. | 比任何事都让我开心 |
| [07:14] | Just ask my dog. | 不信问问我的狗 |
| [07:16] | My vet says if I give her any more foie gras, | 兽医说如果我再喂她鹅肝酱 |
| [07:18] | she’s going to die of gout. | 她就要死于痛风了 |
| [07:21] | Hey, let’s help Raj meet a girl tonight. | 我们今晚帮拉杰找个姑娘吧 |
| [07:24] | No, no, no, I’m fine. | 别了别了 我无所谓 |
| [07:25] | Okay, wait, are we talking one-night stand | 慢着 我们说的是找个姑娘搞一夜情 |
| [07:26] | or do we want to get him into a relationship? | 还是找个姑娘谈恋爱呀 |
| [07:29] | Let’s get him laid! | 找个姑娘把床上 |
| [07:32] | Stop it. You’re ruining girls’ night. | 别这样 闺蜜之夜 主角是闺蜜 |
| [07:36] | Raj, you’re a great guy, | 拉杰 你是个好男人 |
| [07:37] | you’re in a bar full of single women; let us help you. | 而且这酒吧全是单身女人 让我们帮你吧 |
| [07:40] | Yeah, you’re a real catch. | 对啊 你真的是个好对象 |
| [07:41] | I know you’re shy, but that doesn’t mean | 我知道你害羞 但这并不意味着 |
| [07:43] | you shouldn’t have someone wonderful in your life. | 你生命中不应拥有一位佳人 |
| [07:45] | That’s sweet of you. | 你们真好心 |
| [07:46] | But what can you do to help? | 但你们能怎么帮我呢 |
| [07:48] | We’ll nose around, | 我们四周打探一下 |
| [07:49] | see if we can find a nice girl, and then introduce you. | 看看能不能找到一个不错的姑娘 然后介绍你认识 |
| [07:51] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [07:52] | Well, a couple of things. | 有几点要注意 |
| [07:54] | Don’t tell them I come from money. | 别告诉她们我出身富庶 |
| [07:56] | I want them to love me for me. | 我要她们爱我 而不是爱我的钱 |
| [07:59] | They must be insanely hot. | 她们一定要超级性感 |
| [08:03] | Like, nines or tens. | 身材样貌起码得有9分或10分 |
| [08:06] | Nines or tens? | 9分或10分吗 |
| [08:08] | Okay, an eight is acceptable | 好吧 8分也可以接受 |
| [08:10] | if she’s willing to bring another eight to the hot tub. | 前提是她会带另外一个8分女来跟我三人泡澡 |
| [08:13] | Bottom line: you’ll take any woman who’ll have you, right? | 反正 我们找着啥样的你都会要 对吧 |
| [08:16] | In a New Delhi minute. | 果断会要 |
| [08:19] | I don’t remember you buying these miniatures in my store. | 我不记得你在我店里买过这些小模型啊 |
| [08:22] | Oh, uh, yeah. | 是没买过 |
| [08:24] | I got ’em on Amazon. | 这是在亚马逊上买的 |
| [08:26] | Sure. I get it. | 当然 我懂的 |
| [08:27] | Why support a friend | 与其扶持一个朋友 |
| [08:29] | when you can support a multinational conglomerate | 为何不去扶持一家把你朋友的生活 |
| [08:31] | that is crushing the life out of that friend? | 挤压得穷苦潦倒的跨国大企业呢 |
| [08:35] | I know, but when I shop online, | 我知道 但当我上网购物时 |
| [08:36] | I can do it on the toilet. | 我可以边上厕所边买 |
| [08:39] | Have you seen my store? | 你见过我的店吗 |
| [08:40] | The whole place is a toilet. | 那个地方跟厕所没两样 |
| [08:42] | C-Can we please move this along? | 能继续进行游戏了吗 |
| [08:44] | Yeah, sorry. | 可以 抱歉 |
| [08:44] | Uh, you come to the end of the tunnel | 你们走到了的尽头 |
| [08:46] | and find a large chest. | 发现了一个大宝箱[大胸] |
| [08:49] | What do you do? | 你将采取什么行动 |
| [08:49] | And, Howard, do not say, | 对了 霍华德 拜托不要说 |
| [08:51] | “I feel up the large chest.” | “我要上去抓一把” |
| [08:54] | Excuse me, I’m a married man now. | 不好意思 我现在可是已婚男人 |
| [08:56] | I wasn’t going to say anything so juvenile. | 我才不会说这么幼稚的话呢 |
| [08:59] | Great. What do you do? | 很好 那你会怎么做 |
| [09:00] | I walk up to the large chest, | 我会走到那个大胸[大宝箱]前 |
| [09:02] | bury my face in it and go. | 把我的脸埋进去 然后这样玩 |
| [09:09] | – I open the chest. – It’s locked, | -我选择打开宝箱 -锁着呢 |
| [09:11] | but suddenly the door behind you slams shut | 但你身后的门突然砰一声关上 |
| [09:13] | and now the walls of the room start closing in. | 现在房间两侧的墙壁开始往中间逼近 |
| [09:16] | That’s not good. | 这下惨了 |
| [09:17] | My character and I both have claustrophobia. | 我和我的角色都有幽闭恐惧症 |
| [09:20] | Glowing letters appear on the chest that read, | 宝箱上出现发光的字 上面写着 |
| [09:23] | “If squashed to death you wish not to be, | “如果你不想被夹死 |
| [09:25] | sing of Svaty Vaclav and his victory.” | 那就高歌圣威特·瓦茨拉夫和他的胜利” |
| [09:28] | – Who the hell is Svaty Vaclav? – Walls are getting closer. | -谁是圣威特·瓦茨拉夫 -墙越来越近了 |
| [09:30] | Oh, boy, happy place, happy place. | 我得赶紧想着开心的地方 |
| [09:32] | Wait, Svaty Vaclav was the Duke of Bohemia. | 等等 圣威特·瓦茨拉夫是波西米亚的君主 |
| [09:35] | You’re ten seconds away from getting crushed! | 你还有十秒钟就要被夹成肉酱了 |
| [09:37] | Nine, eight… | 九 八… |
| [09:38] | What are we supposed to do? | 我们该怎么办 |
| [09:39] | – …seven, six… – Wait, wait. | -七 六 -等下 等下 |
| [09:40] | Svaty Vaclav is better known as Good King Wenceslas | 圣威特·瓦茨拉夫就是受人喜爱的 |
| [09:44] | from the beloved Victorian Christmas carol. | 维多利亚时代圣诞颂歌里的仁君温瑟拉 |
| [09:45] | Never heard of it. | 从来没听说过 |
| [09:46] | Must be the one Christmas song not written by a Jewish guy. | 肯定就那首圣诞颂歌不是犹太人写的 |
| [09:50] | …three, two… | 三 二… |
| [09:51] | Somebody sing the damn song! | 快唱那首该死的颂歌 |
| [09:53] | * Good King Wenceslas looked out * | * 是日圣徒节 * |
| [09:54] | * On the feast of Stephen * | * 贤君帘外望 * |
| [09:56] | * When the snow lay ’round about * | * 积雪覆大地 * |
| [09:58] | * Deep and crisp and even * | * 松脆且平旷 * |
| [10:00] | The walls are getting slower. | 墙越来越近啦 |
| [10:01] | * Brightly shone the moon that night * | * 是夜月皎皎 * |
| [10:03] | * Though the frost was cru-el * | * 寒霜亦凄凄 * |
| [10:05] | * When a poor man came in sight * | * 但见褴褛者 * |
| [10:07] | * Gath’ring winter fu-el * | * 拾薪不停息 * |
| [10:14] | The walls stop! You’re safe! | 墙壁停下了 你们安全了 |
| [10:16] | That was amazing, Sheldon. | 你可真牛 谢尔顿 |
| [10:17] | – How did you know that? – It was simple. | -你怎么会唱这个 -很简单 |
| [10:19] | I combined a well-known, historical fact | 我将一个关于波西米亚的知名历史事件 |
| [10:21] | about Bohemia with the memory of my grandparents, | 与我对外祖父母的记忆结合在一起 |
| [10:24] | Mee-Maw and Pop-Pop, singing Christmas carols | 那时候外公和外婆 唱着圣诞颂歌 |
| [10:26] | while I sat in front of the fire and tried to build | 而我在壁炉前尝试用乐高来制造 |
| [10:28] | a high-energy particle accelerator out of Legos. | 一个高能粒子加速器 |
| [10:32] | Okay, continuing our quest. | 继续我们的任务吧 |
| [10:34] | W-W-Wait. | 等一下 |
| [10:35] | There’s still four more verses. | 还有四段没唱呢 |
| [10:36] | You don’t sing a song and not finish it. | 总不能唱个开头没结尾吧 |
| [10:38] | * Hither, page, and stand by me * | * 嗟尔侍者来 * |
| [10:40] | * If thou know’st it telling ,* | * 务必据实语 * |
| [10:41] | * Yonder peasant, who is he? * | * 彼处何许人 * |
| [10:43] | * Where and what his dwelling? * | * 此人何所居 * |
| [10:45] | * Brightly shone the moon that night, though the frost…* | * 是夜月皎皎 寒霜亦凄… * |
| [10:58] | Looks like he’s doing pretty good. | 看来他进展不错啊 |
| [11:00] | Of course he is. | 那是当然了 |
| [11:01] | Look, that girl just got dumped by her boyfriend. | 那姑娘刚被男朋友甩了 |
| [11:03] | She’s angry, she’s drunk, | 满心愤怒 又醉得烂醉 |
| [11:04] | and her favorite movie is Slumdog Millionaire. I mean… | 最爱的电影还是印度电影《贫民窟的百万富翁》 |
| [11:07] | That is some low-hanging fruit. | 必须手到擒来啊 |
| [11:11] | Oh, here he comes. | 他回来了 |
| [11:13] | – So, how’d it go? – Great. | -怎么样啊 -一切顺利 |
| [11:14] | I bought her a couple of drinks, | 我请她喝了几杯酒 |
| [11:16] | and she gave me her E-mail address. | 她就把邮箱地址给我了 |
| [11:20] | “Jennifer@not-even-if-you-were- the-last-guy-on-earth.loser”” | 杰妮芙@就算男人死光了只剩你都不要.废柴 |
| [11:26] | What? | 什么 |
| [11:27] | I’m sorry, Raj. | 真遗憾 拉杰 |
| [11:28] | Why can’t I find someone? | 我怎么就找不到我的佳人呢 |
| [11:30] | I’m smart, I’ve got a cool job, | 我智商高 工作好 |
| [11:32] | and my naturally bronzed complexion means | 天生古铜的肤色说明 |
| [11:34] | I can pull off mustard yellow in a way most guys can’t. | 别人穿了难看的芥末黄 我也能穿得帅气 |
| [11:38] | Oh, honey, it’s not you, it’s them. | 亲爱的 不怪你 是她们脑子有病 |
| [11:40] | No, it’s not. | 不是的 |
| [11:42] | She was too beautiful for me. | 她太漂亮了 我高攀不上 |
| [11:44] | – Why would you say that? – It’s true. | -你怎么会说这种话 -是真的 |
| [11:47] | I’m always attracted to women I can’t have. | 我总是迷恋自己得不到的姑娘 |
| [11:49] | I do it all the time. | 我老是这样 |
| [11:51] | I did the same thing with the two of you. | 我以前对你们两个就是啊 |
| [11:53] | The two of them? | 她们两个 |
| [11:54] | I don’t understand. | 我不太明白 |
| [11:57] | Well, uh, there was a time when I had a thing for Penny, | 曾经有段时间我暗恋过佩妮 |
| [12:01] | and I thought she was into me, too, | 而且当时我以为她也喜欢我 |
| [12:02] | because she got drunk and naked | 因为有一次她喝醉后脱光 |
| [12:03] | and climbed into bed with me. | 跟我爬上了床 |
| [12:05] | But apparently I misread those signals. | 但很显然是我自作多情了 |
| [12:10] | And you liked Bernadette also? | 你也喜欢过伯纳黛特啊 |
| [12:12] | That was before Penny. | 那是在佩妮之前 |
| [12:14] | I make it a rule to only fall for | 我自己定了个规矩 一次只能 |
| [12:15] | one of my friends’ girlfriends at a time. | 爱上一位好朋友的女朋友 |
| [12:19] | I’m very old-fashioned that way. | 这方面我挺传统的 |
| [12:21] | So at, uh, some point, | 也就是说你曾经 |
| [12:24] | you probably had a thing for me, too. | 也喜欢过我了吧 |
| [12:29] | No, not really. | 那倒没有 |
| [12:33] | Oh, come on, Raj, not even a little bit? | 拜托 拉杰 一点都没有吗 |
| [12:37] | Not that I can think of. | 反正我想不起来这样过 |
| [12:41] | Think harder. | 给老娘仔细想 |
| [12:45] | Nope. | 没有 |
| [12:46] | I guess the heart wants what the heart wants. | 我的心会跟着心的感觉走吧 |
| [12:48] | Or in this case, doesn’t. | 而她不是我的菜 |
| [12:49] | I mean, at all. | 完全没兴趣 |
| [12:55] | What? | 看我干嘛 |
| [12:59] | * Ye who now will bless the poor * | * 但能济贫士 * |
| [13:01] | * Shall yourselves find blessing * | * 赐福自返还 * |
| [13:08] | Done? | 完啦 |
| [13:09] | I think the word you’re looking for is “bravo.” | 你想说的唱完赞叹词应该是”棒啊” |
| [13:13] | Okay, you leave the room and find yourself | 现在你们离开那个房间 发现自己 |
| [13:15] | standing before a pool of melted snowmen. | 来到一个里面有融化的雪人的池子面前 |
| [13:18] | Melted snowmen? | 融化的雪人 |
| [13:19] | Are there carrots and lumps of coal in the water? | 水里有雪人五官的胡萝卜和煤块吗 |
| [13:21] | I don’t know. What’s the difference? | 不知道 有差别吗 |
| [13:23] | It’s a game of the imagination, Leonard. | 这是个幻想游戏 莱纳德 |
| [13:25] | – Paint a picture. – Fine. | -给我好好描述画面 -好吧 |
| [13:27] | You leave the room and find yourself | 你离开那个房间 发现自己 |
| [13:28] | standing before a pool of melted snowmen. | 来到一个里面有融化的雪人的池子面前 |
| [13:30] | There are carrots and lumps of coal in the water. | 水里尽是胡萝卜和煤块 |
| [13:32] | Do we know what happened to the top hats and the corncob pipes? | 那雪人的大帽子和烟斗上哪了呢 |
| [13:35] | You see those, too. | 你也看见它们在水里了 |
| [13:36] | Oh, it’s like I’m really there. | 真是身临其境呀 |
| [13:41] | I gotta tell you, this-this is the most holiday fun I’ve had | 自从我的治疗师换了我的焦虑症药 |
| [13:45] | since my therapist changed my anxiety medication | 而且我也再也不在乎我的血便后 |
| [13:48] | and I stopped caring about the blood in my stool. | 我不得不说 这是我最开心的过节了 |
| [13:54] | Good story. | 好故事 |
| [13:57] | What are you drinking there? | 你喝什么呢 |
| [13:58] | Little eggnog? | 蛋奶酒吗 |
| [13:59] | Yes. | 是的 |
| [14:00] | What, is there a problem? | 怎么了 不行吗 |
| [14:01] | No, it’s nice to see you enjoying a holiday beverage. | 看你喝圣诞饮品挺好的 |
| [14:04] | Pretty Christmasy. | 很有节日氛围 |
| [14:05] | Since when is eggnog a Christmas drink? | 蛋奶酒什么时候成圣诞专属了 |
| [14:08] | Eggs are available all year ’round. | 一年四季都有鸡蛋生产 |
| [14:11] | I’ve been known to enjoy this poolside. | 大家都知道我爱在泳池边喝这个 |
| [14:14] | Come on, Sheldon. | 拜托 谢尔顿 |
| [14:16] | You know all the Christmas stories, and the carols, | 你知道每一个圣诞故事 和颂歌 |
| [14:18] | you’ve got an eggnog mustache going on there. | 现在还喝出了个蛋奶酒小胡子 |
| [14:20] | Just admit it. | 承认吧 |
| [14:22] | You’re getting a little Yuletide spirit. | 你挺喜欢圣诞的 |
| [14:23] | Oh, don’t be silly. | 别傻了 |
| [14:25] | Christmas is a bunch of baloney created by the tinsel industry. | 圣诞节只不过是装饰品工业编出来骗钱的 |
| [14:29] | Why is this so important to you? | 对你来说有什么要紧的啊 |
| [14:31] | Honestly, because I had enough crappy Christmases as a kid | 坦白说 因为我小时候的圣诞节都过得很糟 |
| [14:33] | and I’m tired of you sucking the joy out of them now. | 现在不想你再扫我的兴了 |
| [14:35] | What was so bad about them? | 怎么过得不好了 |
| [14:37] | I grew up in a house full of crazy academics. | 我家人都是疯子学术家 |
| [14:39] | Instead of leaving Santa milk and cookies, | 我们小孩不给圣诞老人留牛奶和饼干 |
| [14:42] | we had to leave him a research paper. | 而是得留给他一份研究报告 |
| [14:45] | And in the morning, you could tell he’d been there | 而第二天早晨 你会知道圣诞老人来过 |
| [14:47] | because the paper would be graded. | 因为你留的报告都评好分了 |
| [14:51] | No wonder you love Christmas. | 怪不得你这么喜欢圣诞节 |
| [14:52] | That sounds amazing. | 听起来真是太酷了 |
| [14:55] | It wasn’t amazing. | 一点也不酷 |
| [14:56] | I got a C-minus four years in a row. | 我曾连续四年得了C- |
| [14:59] | Yeah, I’m familiar with your work. | 我知道你的水平 |
| [15:01] | C-minus was your gift. | C-都算送了你大礼了 |
| [15:06] | Amy, I’m really sorry. | 艾米 真是对不起 |
| [15:08] | I didn’t mean to upset you. | 我不是故意让你难过的 |
| [15:10] | It’s fine. | 没事 |
| [15:11] | I’m used to being the girl who never gets looked at twice. | 我已经习惯被男生无视了 |
| [15:14] | I didn’t have my first kiss till I was 22, | 直到22岁 我才等到我的初吻 |
| [15:16] | and the guy only did it so I’d give him back his insulin. | 那人亲我是因为我拿他的胰岛素要挟 |
| [15:22] | Sometimes the pancreas wants what the pancreas wants. | 有时候 胰腺会跟着胰腺的感觉走 |
| [15:27] | Forget it. | 算了 |
| [15:28] | I don’t expect you guys to understand. | 我没指望你们能明白 |
| [15:30] | I understand. | 我明白 |
| [15:31] | In seventh grade, I played Spin the Bottle | 七年级我玩”转瓶子”游戏时 |
| [15:33] | and it landed on Alina Shankar. | 瓶子指向了爱林娜·香卡 |
| [15:35] | She said if I came near her, | 她说如果我敢靠近她 |
| [15:36] | she would break the bottle and cut me. | 她就敲碎瓶子捅我 |
| [15:39] | You think that’s bad? | 你觉得这样算悲催吗 |
| [15:41] | In college, I passed out at a frat party | 大学时 我在兄弟会派对上喝到不省人事 |
| [15:42] | and woke up with more clothes on. | 醒来时发现衣服没少 反而更多了 |
| [15:50] | Sometimes I get so lonely, | 有时候我感觉太孤单 |
| [15:51] | I sit on my left hand until it goes numb, | 我会坐在左手上直到左手麻木 |
| [15:53] | then I put it in my right hand | 然后用右手握住 |
| [15:55] | and pretend I’m holding hands with another person. | 假装是别人在握住我的手 |
| [15:59] | I do that, too. | 我也会这么做 |
| [16:01] | Sometimes the left hand tries to cop a feel. | 有时候左手想伸伸禄山之爪 |
| [16:05] | And I let it. | 我也任它随便摸 |
| [16:10] | It’s kind of nice to talk to someone who understands | 能和了解孤单的人聊天 |
| [16:12] | what it feels like to be alone. | 感觉真是太好了 |
| [16:14] | It is, isn’t it? | 是吧 |
| [16:15] | But you’re not alone anymore. | 但你现在不再孤单了 |
| [16:17] | – Now you’ve got Sheldon. – I do. | -你有谢尔顿 -是的 |
| [16:19] | And don’t worry, someday you’ll have somebody, too. | 别担心 终有一天你也会有佳人相伴的 |
| [16:22] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [16:24] | I hope she’s half as lovely and amazing as you are. | 她只要有你一半美丽聪慧 我就心满意足了 |
| [16:29] | Thank you, Rajesh. | 谢谢你 拉杰什 |
| [16:31] | He wants me, I’m good. We can go now. | 他对我动心了 我满意了 撤 |
| [16:36] | Damn it. | 我靠 |
| [16:37] | What? | 怎么了 |
| [16:38] | Now that I know she doesn’t like me, | 现在我知道她不喜欢我 |
| [16:40] | I’m kind of into her. | 我好像有点喜欢她了 |
| [16:43] | All right. | 好了 |
| [16:45] | I think I cracked the code to lower the drawbridge. | 我想我破解了密码 可以放下吊桥了 |
| [16:49] | Great. Let’s do it. | 太好了 开始吧 |
| [16:57] | The drawbridge is lowering. | 吊桥正在缓缓放下 |
| [17:05] | My carpal tunnel’s acting up. | 我的腕管综合症发作了 |
| [17:07] | Play through the pain! | 痛也得坚持 |
| [17:19] | You did it! The drawbridge is down. | 成功了 吊桥放下了 |
| [17:21] | You cross the chasm | 你们跨过峡谷 |
| [17:23] | and find yourself in a small dungeon room. | 来到一间小小的地牢 |
| [17:25] | And in the corner, chained to the wall, | 在墙角 是被铁链锁住 |
| [17:28] | you see a bloodied and beaten Santa Claus. | 被打到浑身鲜血的圣诞老人 |
| [17:31] | He says, “Ho, ho, help me.” | 他说 “呵 呵 救命” |
| [17:35] | Yes, we found Santa! | 太棒了 我们找到了圣诞老人 |
| [17:37] | Christmas is saved! | 圣诞节被拯救了 |
| [17:39] | Don’t ever tell my mother I said that. | 千万别告诉我妈我说过这句话[犹太人不过圣诞] |
| [17:43] | I take out my skeleton key | 我取出万能钥匙 |
| [17:44] | and run to Santa to unchain him. | 跑向圣诞老人给他解开铁链 |
| [17:46] | But first, I cast a spell of paralysis on Stuart and Howard. | 但我抢先向斯图尔特和霍华德施了麻痹咒 |
| [17:50] | What are you doing? | 你这是干嘛 |
| [17:51] | You can’t talk; you’re paralyzed. | 你不能说话 你已经被我麻痹了 |
| [17:54] | I get right up in Santa’s big, fat face and say… | 我来到圣诞老人的大肥脸跟前说 |
| [17:57] | Well, well, well, | 瞧瞧瞧 |
| [17:59] | Jolly old Saint Nick, we meet again. | 乐呵呵的圣诞老头儿 我们又见面了 |
| [18:02] | Yeah, I believe the last time we spoke | 我相信上次我们聊天 |
| [18:03] | was in the Baybrook Mall in Galveston, Texas, | 还是在德州加尔维斯顿市的溪湾商场 |
| [18:06] | when I was five years old, isn’t that right? | 我当时五岁 对吗 |
| [18:08] | Uh, okay. | 好吧 |
| [18:11] | My mother dragged me there | 我妈硬把我拉去 |
| [18:12] | and she plopped me down on your lap | 让我坐在你的大腿上 |
| [18:14] | and you asked me what I wanted for Christmas. | 你问我圣诞节想要什么 |
| [18:16] | And I told you “My Pop-Pop,” | 我告诉你 “我要我的外公” |
| [18:18] | because that was the year my grandfather died. | 因为那年我的外公去世了 |
| [18:21] | I missed him and I wanted him back. | 我想他 我想让他死而复生 |
| [18:25] | This is weird, right? | 现在有点诡异 对吧 |
| [18:30] | Pop-Pop was the only one in my family | 家里只有外公一个人 |
| [18:31] | who encouraged me to pursue science. | 鼓励我追求科学的真谛 |
| [18:34] | But you didn’t bring him back, did you? | 但你没让他起死回生 对吗 |
| [18:36] | Instead, I got Lincoln Logs. | 我得到的礼物是林肯积木 |
| [18:39] | Well, you can build a lot of neat things out of Lincoln Logs, | 用林肯积木可以搭出很多有意思的东西 |
| [18:42] | but Pop-Pop ain’t one of ’em. | 但是搭不出外公 |
| [18:45] | And now you’re here asking me for something– | 你现在竟然敢向我提出要求 |
| [18:48] | to save you. | 要我救你 |
| [18:49] | Well, sorry, Mr. Kringle, | 抱歉了 圣诞老人先生 |
| [18:52] | but today’s not your day. | 今天不能让你如愿了 |
| [18:53] | I’m leaving you here to rot, | 我要让你死在这里 |
| [18:55] | and I hope the ogres feast on your bones. | 希望食人魔把你吃到尸骨无存 |
| [18:58] | I take the skeleton key, | 我拿起万能钥匙 |
| [18:59] | and I toss it into the chasm, | 扔进峡谷里 |
| [19:01] | and on the way out, I give Santa | 离开之前 我给了圣诞老人的 |
| [19:03] | a swift kick in his bowl full of jelly! | 肥果冻肚皮闪电一踹 |
| [19:03] | bowl full of jelly 装满果冻的碗 是圣诞歌的歌词 形容圣诞老人的肚子 | |
| [19:08] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [19:10] | So Wolowitz and Stuart are paralyzed, Santa’s dead, | 沃罗威茨和斯图尔特被麻痹了 圣诞老人死了 |
| [19:13] | and I picked this over having sex with my girlfriend. | 而我居然不和女友上床跑来玩这个 |
| [19:35] | Santa? | 圣诞老人 |
| [19:36] | Oh, hello, Sheldon. | 你好 谢尔顿 |
| [19:40] | You should be asleep. | 你应该在睡觉啊 |
| [19:43] | Well, then, you shouldn’t have jingle bells on your boots. | 那你就别在靴子上挂铃铛吵人睡觉啊 |
| [19:47] | I’ve been wanting to talk to you. | 我想跟你聊聊 |
| [19:49] | I’m sorry I disappointed you when you were a little boy. | 抱歉在你小时候 我让你失望了 |
| [19:55] | I-I can do a lot of magical things, | 我能施展魔法做到不少事 |
| [19:58] | but unfortunately | 但遗憾的是 |
| [19:59] | bringing your Pop-Pop back isn’t one of them. | 我没有能力让你的外公死而复生 |
| [20:04] | I understand. | 我明白 |
| [20:06] | But I-I do have something special for you. | 但我有特别的礼物送给你 |
| [20:10] | Close your eyes. | 闭上眼 |
| [20:14] | Oh, I hope it’s a train. | 希望是火车 |
| [20:16] | Oh, it’s better than a train. | 比火车要好 |
| [20:19] | Two trains? | 两辆火车吗 |
| [20:23] | Better. | 更好 |
| [20:24] | I’m getting three trains. | 我要有三辆火车啦 |
| [20:28] | Okay, open ’em. | 好了 睁眼吧 |
| [20:34] | This is for leaving me in the dungeon | 这是回敬你把我留在地牢 |
| [20:36] | to be eaten alive by ogres! | 让食人魔给生吞活剥了 |
| [20:39] | Wait, uh, uh, hang on. | 等等 别激动 |
| [20:40] | I-In my defense… | 容我解释下 |
| [20:42] | Ho, ho, ho, ya big dork! | 呵呵呵 你个大傻帽 |