时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:06] | All I’m saying is, if they took all the money they spent | 我只是想说 一部像样的《绿巨人》 |
[00:08] | trying to make a decent Hulk movie, | 让电影公司砸了不少钱 |
[00:09] | they could probably just make an actual Hulk. | 他们完全可以拿这笔钱 造一个真正的绿巨人出来 |
[00:13] | That is apt and amusing. | 这观点真是聪明又有趣 |
[00:15] | I think I shall share that with Amy Farrah Fowler. | 我应该跟艾米·菲拉·福勒分享 |
[00:19] | She’ll appreciate the witticism. | 她一定会欣赏你的妙语连珠 |
[00:21] | Thank you. | 不敢当 |
[00:22] | It’ll also help improve her initial impression of you. | 这同时也能改善你在她心目中的最初印象 |
[00:27] | So what’s going on with you two? | 你们俩最近如何 |
[00:28] | Well, the status is as it always was. | 状态一直维持不变 |
[00:31] | She’s a girl. She’s a friend. | 她是位女生 她也是位朋友 |
[00:33] | She is not my– | 但她不是我的 |
[00:34] | please forgive me for doing this– | 请原谅我做这个动作 |
[00:36] | “Girlfriend.” | “女朋友” |
[00:38] | Right, right. | 好吧 好吧 |
[00:40] | So you’re still just texting and emailing? | 所以你们一直保持在发短信和发邮件的阶段吗 |
[00:42] | You don’t feel any need to hang out with her, you know– | 你难道一点也不想跟她呆在一起吗 比如 |
[00:44] | be in the same room? | 呆在一个房间也好啊 |
[00:46] | Leonard, you are my best friend. | 莱纳德 你是我最好的朋友 |
[00:49] | I’ve known you for seven years, | 我认识你整整七年了 |
[00:50] | and I can barely tolerate sitting on the couch with you. | 而我却还难以忍受 咱俩同坐在一个沙发上这个事实 |
[00:54] | Imagine my attitude regarding | 你就可以想象得到 |
[00:56] | prolonged physical proximity to Amy Farrah Fowler. | 我对与艾米·菲拉·福勒长时间身体接触的态度了 |
[01:00] | Got it. | 明白了 |
[01:02] | I sense judgment on your part. | 我感觉你有意见 |
[01:04] | No, no. | 没有 哪有 |
[01:06] | Maybe a little. | 或许有那么一点儿吧 |
[01:08] | May I suggest that your criticism is based on jealousy. | 我可以认为你的批评是基于嫉妒吗 |
[01:13] | Jealousy? What do I have to be jealous of? | 嫉妒 有什么值得让我嫉妒的 |
[01:15] | I have a functioning and satisfying relationship with a female. | 我与一位女性有一段运行良好且令人满意的关系 |
[01:20] | You have none. | 而你没有 |
[01:23] | Oh, right. That. | 被你说中了 |
[01:25] | Jealousy is an ugly green-eyed monster– | 嫉妒是一个丑陋的 眼发绿光的怪物 |
[01:27] | not unlike the Hulk– | 跟绿巨人浩克一样 |
[01:28] | who, by the way, also has a girlfriend. | 随便说一下 人家也是有女朋友的 |
[01:32] | In this iteration, Jennifer Connelly, | 在这段重播里 妮弗·康纳利 |
[01:34] | whom you may recall as the girlfriend of Russell Crowe | 或许你记得的版本是《美丽心灵》里 |
[01:36] | in A Beautiful Mind, | 罗素·克洛的女朋友 |
[01:37] | a feel-good romp if there ever was one. | 说不定都和绿巨人共赴巫山了 |
[01:42] | I’m not jealous. | 我才没有嫉妒 |
[01:45] | Leonard not jealous. | 莱纳德一点儿也不嫉妒 |
[02:14] | You know, it just occurred to me, | 我刚想到一件事 |
[02:15] | if there are an infinite number of parallel universes, | 如果存在千万个平行宇宙 |
[02:19] | in one of them, there’s probably a Sheldon | 在其中的一个 那里很可能有一位谢尔顿 |
[02:22] | who doesn’t believe parallel universes exist. | 他根本不相信有平行宇宙的存在 |
[02:26] | Probably. What’s your point? | 很可能 你的重点是什么 |
[02:27] | No point. | 没重点 |
[02:28] | It’s just one of the things | 这只是让千万个我中的某我 |
[02:29] | that makes one of the mes chuckle. | 发笑的理由之一 |
[02:34] | What makes you chuckle, Leonard? | 莱纳德 什么事会让你发笑 |
[02:36] | Hmm, recently? | 最近吗 |
[02:38] | Not much. | 不是很多 |
[02:39] | Is it because of the conflict that arises | 是因为那场争端吗 起因于 |
[02:41] | from your desperate need to pair-bond with a woman, | 你极其需要与一个女人建立对偶关系 |
[02:44] | and the apparent collective decision of all womankind | 而显然所有的女性做出的决定 |
[02:46] | to deny you that opportunity? | 都是否决了你 |
[02:50] | Um… | 呃 |
[02:52] | Shut up. | 你还是把嘴闭上吧 |
[02:55] | You know, when my grandfather died, | 当我爷爷过世之后 |
[02:57] | and Meemaw was alone, my mom arranged for her | 剩奶奶独自一人 我妈妈就安排 |
[02:59] | to visit a center three times a week | 让她一周去三次活动中心 |
[03:01] | where she could socialize with other lonely people. | 在那里 她可以与同样孤独的人交流 |
[03:05] | It’s very nice. | 这个安排非常好 |
[03:06] | They discuss current events, play bridge, get a hot meal. | 他们讨论时事 玩桥牌 吃热乎乎的饭 |
[03:10] | That sounds lovely. | 听起来不错 |
[03:11] | It is if you like bridge. | 如果你喜欢玩桥牌的话 |
[03:14] | Do you like bridge, Leonard? | 你喜欢玩桥牌吗 莱纳德 |
[03:17] | Sheldon, I’m just not dating someone right now. | 谢尔顿 我只是现在没有人约会而已 |
[03:20] | I don’t need to go to a senior center. | 不用把我送到老年活动中心吧 |
[03:24] | Meemaw resisted at first, but now she loves it. | 奶奶一开始也是拒绝 但后来她欲罢不能 |
[03:28] | Fine. If I don’t meet someone soon, | 好 如果我最近还没碰到合适的人 |
[03:29] | you can put me in a home. | 你就把我送去养老院得了 |
[03:31] | It’s not a home. | 那不是养老院 |
[03:32] | It’s a senior center. | 是老年人活动中心 |
[03:35] | We’d never put Meemaw in a home! | 我们绝不会把奶奶送到养老院 |
[03:39] | Hey, guys. | 嗨 大家好啊 |
[03:40] | – Hey. – Hey. | -嗨 -嗨 |
[03:41] | All right, I’ll bow to social pressure: Hey! | 我屈服于社交的压力 跟你们打声招呼吧 |
[03:47] | Excuse me. That’s my girlfriend, Bernadette. | 抱歉 我女朋友伯纳黛特打来的 |
[03:49] | I assigned her her own ringtone– | 我给她设了专门的铃声 |
[03:51] | “Bernadette,” By The Four Tops. | 用的“四顶尖”唱的《伯纳黛特》 |
[03:53] | Hello, Bernadette. | 伯纳黛特 你好啊 |
[03:56] | When I call him, his phone plays “Brown Eyed Girl.” | 我给他打电话时 铃声是”褐眼女孩” |
[04:00] | Which, now that I think about it, is not so good. | 现在回想起来 好像不是那么好了 |
[04:03] | You realize he’s just rubbing our noses in the fact | 你应该意识到 他是在炫耀他有女朋友而咱们没有 |
[04:05] | that he has a girlfriend, and we don’t. | 故意让咱们不爽 |
[04:07] | You mean, you don’t. | 你是说 你没有吧 |
[04:10] | You have a girlfriend? | 连你都有女朋友了 |
[04:11] | How could you have a girlfriend? | 你怎么会有女朋友呢 |
[04:12] | You can’t even speak to women. | 你在女人面前连话都说不出来 |
[04:13] | Two words– deaf chick. | 送你两个字 聋女 |
[04:17] | It doesn’t matter if I can’t talk, | 所以我说不说话都没关系 |
[04:19] | because she can’t hear me. | 因为她根本听不见 |
[04:22] | What? | 什么 |
[04:22] | That’s what she said. | 这是她的原话 |
[04:26] | Great. You have a girlfriend, Howard’s got a girlfriend, | 很好 你有女朋友 霍华德有女朋友 |
[04:28] | – Sheldon’s got a girl… – No, no, no, no! | -谢尔顿有女 -错错错错 |
[04:29] | …who’s a friend. | 女性朋友 |
[04:30] | Thank you. | 多谢 |
[04:33] | What about you, Stuart? | 你呢 斯图特 |
[04:34] | You have a girlfriend yet? | 你有女朋友了吗 |
[04:35] | Oh, yeah. Yeah. | 有了 有了 |
[04:36] | I met her at Comic-Con, | 我们是在动漫大会上相遇的 |
[04:38] | the one place in the world where saying | 那里是全世界唯一一个地方 |
[04:40] | “I own a comic bookstore” | 可以用”我有一家漫画书屋” |
[04:41] | is an actual pickup line. | 作为真正的开场白 |
[04:44] | Oh. Well, good for you. | 哇哦 恭喜你 |
[04:45] | Not really. She’s horrible. | 其实她很可怕 |
[04:48] | When she wants to have sex, | 当她想做爱的时候 |
[04:49] | she puts on her plus-size Wonder Woman costume and shouts, | 她会穿上她超大号的神奇女侠装 然后大喊 |
[04:52] | “Who wants to take a ride in my invisible plane?” | “谁想坐一下我的隐形飞机” |
[04:57] | Why don’t you just break up with her? | 你为什么不直接跟她分手呢 |
[04:59] | No, no, I can’t. | 不 我做不到 |
[05:01] | Why not? | 为什么 |
[05:01] | ‘Cause then I’d be alone, like you. | 因为分手后 我形影单只 像你一样 |
[05:07] | Dude, why don’t you just invoke | 兄弟 你为什么不让沃罗威茨 |
[05:08] | your girlfriend pact with Wolowitz? | 履行女友条例呢 |
[05:10] | Because I don’t need his girlfriend | 因为我用不着他女朋友 |
[05:13] | to set me up with one of her girlfriends. | 介绍一个女朋友给我 |
[05:15] | I’m perfectly capable of finding a girl on my own. | 我完全有能力自己找一个女朋友 |
[05:18] | Oh, Leonard, you remind me | 莱纳德 你让我想到 |
[05:20] | of the funny old story about a man | 一个古老的搞笑故事 |
[05:22] | who walks into a women’s correctional institution | 是讲一个男人拿着一叠 |
[05:24] | with a stack of paperwork | 女囚犯的释放许可 |
[05:26] | that will allow the female convicts to go free. | 走进女子监狱 |
[05:29] | You’re saying I couldn’t get laid | 你是想说 我即使拿着赦令 |
[05:30] | in a women’s prison with a handful of pardons. | 走进女子监狱 也没人会跟我上床 |
[05:34] | Are you going to let me tell the story or not? | 你到底还让不让我讲这个故事了 |
[05:40] | Leonard? | 莱纳德 |
[05:42] | Are you sleeping? | 你在睡觉吗 |
[05:43] | No. | 没有 |
[05:44] | Are you ill? | 你病了吗 |
[05:45] | No. | 没有 |
[05:46] | Are you still depressed | 你还为你的寂寞和无人疼爱 |
[05:47] | because you’re alone, and no one loves you? | 而郁郁寡欢吗 |
[05:51] | I don’t know. Maybe. | 不知道 也许吧 |
[05:52] | I want you to know that I’m genuinely concerned | 我想让你知道 我由衷地关心 |
[05:54] | about your well-being. | 你的身体健康 |
[05:56] | – Thank you. – You’re welcome. | -谢谢 -不用客气 |
[05:58] | But it’s still no reason to have your feet in my spot. | 但是你还是没有理由把脚放在我的位子上 |
[06:04] | May I offer an observation? | 我可以说说我的看法吗 |
[06:08] | What the hell? How long has she been here? | 搞什么 她在这多久了 |
[06:10] | Since we got home from the comic bookstore. | 打我们从漫画店回来开始 |
[06:12] | That was two hours ago. | 那是两小时前的事了 |
[06:14] | As per your suggestion, | 根据你的建议 |
[06:15] | we’re hanging out. | 我们正在相处 |
[06:16] | Quite frankly, I don’t see | 老实说 我都不知道 |
[06:17] | what all the hoopla’s about. | 你有什么好大惊小怪的 |
[06:19] | Go on, Amy. | 继续说 艾米 |
[06:20] | From a neurobiological standpoint, Leonard, | 从神经生物学的角度看 莱纳德 |
[06:22] | you may be alone | 你之所以独身 |
[06:23] | because your psychological state is causing | 可能是由于你的心理状态 |
[06:25] | an actual pheromone-based stink of desperation. | 导致你的身体散发出绝望的味道 |
[06:30] | Did you know that, Leonard? | 你知道这个理论吗 莱纳德 |
[06:31] | – No. – I did. | -不知道 -我就知道 |
[06:34] | I understand that some people find mates | 我知道有些人在公共聚集场所 |
[06:36] | in social gathering places such as bars or taverns. | 像是酒吧或是小酒馆里寻找伴侣 |
[06:39] | Have you tried a bar or tavern? | 你到酒吧或是酒馆试过吗 |
[06:40] | No, I’m not gonna try to pick up a woman in a bar. | 没有 我才不要去酒吧里泡妞呢 |
[06:43] | Wise decision. You see, Amy, | 明智的决定 听我分析 艾米 |
[06:45] | success at a bar is based on classic male attributes | 想要在酒吧成功找到伴侣 是要靠 |
[06:49] | such as height, strength, attractiveness, | 典型的男性特质的 像是身高 力量 |
[06:52] | the ability to hold one’s liquor and throw darts — | 魅力 还有喝酒和投飞镖的能力 |
[06:54] | separately or together. | 或是边喝酒边投飞镖的能力 |
[06:56] | Leonard has none of these attributes, | 而莱纳德不具备其中的任何一点特质 |
[06:58] | right, Leonard? | 对吧 莱纳德 |
[07:01] | Right. | 没错 |
[07:04] | That’s not true of all bars. | 并不是在所有吧都要这样的 |
[07:05] | Juice bars, for example. | 比如说果汁吧 |
[07:07] | Oh! Good point, Amy. | 说得好 艾米 |
[07:09] | Yeah, building on your premise, | 在这个前提下 |
[07:11] | Leonard could frequent sushi bars, | 莱纳德可以经常光顾寿司吧 |
[07:13] | salad bars, oyster bars, | 沙拉吧 生蚝吧 |
[07:15] | the Apple Genius Bar…what are you doing? | 还有苹果天才吧 你在干吗 |
[07:17] | Keep going. I’m listening. | 继续说吧 我听着呢 |
[07:21] | That was rude. | 真没礼貌 |
[07:23] | He does it all the time. | 他总是这样 |
[07:24] | He’s a cornucopia of social awkwardness. | 他就是社交无能的集合体 |
[07:28] | Cornucopia. | 集合体 |
[07:29] | What a mellifluous word. | 多么甜美流畅的词呀 |
[07:31] | Let’s make that our word of the day. | 就把这个词定为今日美词吧 |
[07:32] | Agreed. And we’ll use mellifluous tomorrow. | 同意 明天开始用”甜美流畅” |
[07:36] | Well, I have to void my bladder. | 我要去排空一下我的膀胱 |
[07:39] | It was nice spending this time with you. | 跟你一起相处很愉快 |
[07:41] | Wait. | 等一下 |
[07:42] | I have a request. | 我有个请求 |
[07:43] | Yes? | 什么请求 |
[07:44] | I’d like you to meet my mother. | 我想让你见见我的母亲 |
[07:46] | I see. | 知道了 |
[07:47] | Can I get back to you on that? | 我回头答复你好吗 |
[07:49] | Certainly. Good night. | 当然可以 晚安 |
[07:50] | Good night. | 晚安 |
[07:57] | Leonard, Leonard, Leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[07:59] | Leonard, Leonard, Leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:00] | Leonard, Leonard, leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:02] | Leonard, Leonard, Leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:04] | Leonard, Leonard, Leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:05] | Leonard, Leonard, | 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:06] | Leonard, Leonard… | 莱纳德 莱纳德 |
[08:07] | Yeah, what? | 干吗 |
[08:09] | Amy Farrah Fowler has asked me to meet her mother. | 艾米·菲拉·福勒让我见她母亲 |
[08:12] | Yeah. So? | 那又怎样 |
[08:14] | What does that mean? | 这是什么意思 |
[08:16] | Well, you know how you’re always saying | 你不是总是说 |
[08:18] | that Amy is a girl who’s your friend, | 艾米只是你的女性朋友吗 |
[08:20] | and not your girlfriend? | 而不是你的女朋友 |
[08:21] | – Uh-huh. – You can’t say that anymore. | -嗯 -你以后就不能再这么说咯 |
[08:26] | Wait. What? | 等一下 你说什么 |
[08:28] | Look, she obviously wants | 她很显然 |
[08:29] | to take your relationship to the next level. | 想要你们的关系更进一步 |
[08:31] | I don’t want the next level. | 我不想更进一步 |
[08:33] | I like this level. | 我喜欢现在这步 |
[08:36] | Fix it for me! | 帮我搞掂她 |
[08:38] | Me? | 我 |
[08:39] | Well, how am I supposed to fix it? | 我怎么帮你搞掂啊 |
[08:41] | Simple! You want a girlfriend, | 很简单 你想要女朋友 |
[08:43] | Amy wants to be someone’s girlfriend. | 艾米想要当别人的女朋友 |
[08:44] | Take her off my hands. I give you my blessing. | 我把她给你 我会祝福你们的 |
[08:48] | That is insane. | 你都疯的 |
[08:49] | You’re right. It would never work. | 没错 不会成功的 |
[08:50] | Amy finds you tedious. | 艾米觉得你很乏味 |
[08:53] | Okay, good luck. | 好吧 祝你好运 |
[08:54] | Wait! What am I supposed to do? | 等一下 我该怎么办啊 |
[08:56] | Well, have you considered telling her how you feel? | 你有没有想过跟她分享你的感受 |
[08:59] | Leonard, I’m a physicist, not a hippie. | 莱纳德 我是物理学家 不是嬉皮士 |
[09:04] | All right, well, let me see | 好吧 让我想想 |
[09:05] | if I can explain your situation using physics. | 看我能不能用物理现象解释给你听 |
[09:08] | What would you be | 如果说你被绑在 |
[09:10] | if you were attached to another object | 一个围绕轴心成螺旋状的 |
[09:12] | by an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis? | 倾斜平面上的话 你的下场会是什么 |
[09:16] | Screwed. | 拧一块儿了[也有完蛋的意思] |
[09:21] | There you go. | 懂了吧 |
[09:26] | Amy’s right. | 艾米说的没错 |
[09:27] | He is tedious. | 他真没劲儿 |
[09:33] | Howard, get the door! | 霍华德 去开门 |
[09:38] | Why can’t you get it? | 你干嘛不去 |
[09:40] | You know I’m doing a bowel cleanse for my colonoscopy! | 你知道我在为准备结肠镜检查浣肠 |
[09:46] | I’m like an upside-down volcano here. | 我这里就像个大头朝下的火山 |
[09:53] | Oh, hey. | 是你呀 好啊 |
[09:54] | I hope you didn’t hear that. | 但愿你没听到 |
[09:55] | The volcano thing? No. | 火山什么的吗 没听到 |
[09:58] | What’s with the T-shirt? | 怎么穿了这么一件T恤 |
[10:00] | You working at the Apple store now? | 现在在苹果专卖店打工了吗 |
[10:01] | No, it’s just something I threw on. | 不是啦 就是随便穿的 |
[10:04] | I know all your shirts. | 你的衣服我都认得 |
[10:05] | That’s not one of them… | 你没这件 |
[10:07] | You were pretending to work at the Genius Bar | 你假装在天才咨询吧工作 |
[10:08] | to pick up women, weren’t you? | 借机泡妞是不是 |
[10:12] | Yeah. | 是 |
[10:15] | Turns out, they guard the iPods, | 我发现原来他们只管看着iPod |
[10:16] | but they don’t guard the shirts. | 没人管这些T恤 |
[10:18] | So, how’d it go? | 那成果如何 |
[10:20] | It was going well. | 本来挺顺利的 |
[10:21] | I was showing this super hot girl | 我给个辣妹展示 |
[10:23] | how to boot up in Safe Mode. | 怎样从安全模式启动 |
[10:24] | The manager got suspicious, and, well, long story short, | 经理起了疑心 长话短说吧 |
[10:28] | they really do have a little jail in the mall. | 那商场里真的有个小号房 |
[10:32] | Just FYI, don’t try to go back with a fake mustache. | 听哥句劝 千万别贴上假胡子接着回去装 |
[10:35] | I mean, they may not really be geniuses, | 他们虽然不天才 |
[10:37] | but they see right through that. | 却能立马看出你是装的 |
[10:40] | I want to invoke the girlfriend pact, Howard. | 我申请调用女友约定 霍华德 |
[10:43] | You that desperate? | 你这么饥渴 |
[10:44] | No, I just… I want what you have. | 也不是 我就是想像你一样 |
[10:46] | You know, I want a woman in my life. | 你懂的 身边有个女人 |
[10:48] | Holy Moses, | 天呐 |
[10:50] | how much liquid can be in one tokus? | 菊花到底能灌进多少液体啊 |
[10:57] | To be clear, I meant like Bernadette, not your mother. | 明确一下 我说的是伯纳黛特不是你妈 |
[10:59] | Yeah, I know what you mean. | 我明白你的意思 |
[11:05] | Well, I’m off to meet Bernadette’s friend. | 我要去见伯纳黛特的朋友了 |
[11:07] | How do I look? | 我看起来咋样 |
[11:09] | As if one of the plants | 就好像《人体异形》里 |
[11:10] | from Invasion of the Body Snatchers duplicated you in every way, | 某植物复制出来的你 |
[11:14] | only with an absurd amount of hair gel. | 不过是海量发胶版的 |
[11:18] | What are you working on? | 你在干嘛呢 |
[11:19] | I’m removing my digital footprint from the Internet | 我在清除我的网络足迹 |
[11:22] | so Amy Farrah Fowler can’t find me | 这样艾米·菲拉·福勒就找不到我了 |
[11:24] | and compel me to meet her mother. Ah. | 也就没法逼我见她妈了 |
[11:27] | You’re going off the grid. | 你是在玩儿失踪啊 |
[11:28] | Exactly. | 正解 |
[11:29] | The old Unabomber approach. Kudos. | 早年炸弹客的做法啊 不错嘛 |
[11:33] | Thank you. | 多谢 |
[11:34] | I’ve also sent Amy a relationship termination notice | 我还发给了艾米一封关系终止通知 |
[11:37] | and changed my cell phone number and e-mail address. | 并更换了手机号和邮箱地址 |
[11:41] | What if she just comes over? | 她直接过来怎么办 |
[11:43] | She’ll get lost. | 她找不到的 |
[11:44] | We no longer live at 2311 Los Robles. | 我们已经不住Los Robles 2311号了 |
[11:47] | We now live at 311 Los Robles. | 我们的现住址是Los Robles 311号 |
[11:54] | You changed the address on the building? | 你把门牌号给改了 |
[11:56] | What about mail? | 信件怎么办 |
[11:57] | Oh, no worries– I explained my predicament | 放心吧 我跟咱的邮差解释了 |
[11:59] | to our letter carrier. | 我当前的囧境 |
[12:01] | He was sympathetic. | 他很是同情 |
[12:02] | His exact words were: | 他的原话是 |
[12:03] | “Got your back, Jack. | “哥们挺你 兄弟 |
[12:04] | Bitches be crazy.” | 妞儿们都疯了” |
[12:13] | Who is it? | 谁啊 |
[12:14] | Amy Farrah Fowler. | 艾米·菲拉·福勒 |
[12:19] | Darn! She found me! | 我去 被她逮到了 |
[12:21] | She’s been here before. | 她来过这里好不好 |
[12:24] | The only flaw in an otherwise perfect plan. | 智者千虑必有一失 |
[12:29] | Now, get my back, Jack. | 现在你得挺我 兄弟 |
[12:30] | – What do you want to do? – Tell her I’m not here. | -你想让我怎么办 -跟她说我不在 |
[12:32] | – Okay, where are you? – I don’t know. | -那你在哪儿 -不知道 |
[12:34] | You’ll have to devise a scenario | 你得自己设计个情节 |
[12:35] | that plausibly explains my absence, | 合理地解释我的不在场 |
[12:37] | keeping in mind that the key to a good lie lies in the details. | 要记得 说谎的秘诀在于善于编织细节 |
[12:55] | Hi, Amy. | 你好啊 艾米 |
[12:55] | Sheldon’s not here. | 谢尔顿不在 |
[12:57] | All right. | 好吧 |
[13:04] | Way to go on the details. | 细节编织得可真到位呀 |
[13:08] | Thanks again for doing this, Bernadette. | 再次感谢你帮我 伯纳黛特 |
[13:10] | Oh, I take pacts very seriously. | 我向来恪守约定 |
[13:12] | One time at my lab, | 有一次在实验室 |
[13:14] | a petri dish of genetically modified super-virus went missing. | 一个转基因超级病毒培养皿不见了 |
[13:17] | That day we made a pinky swear never to admit | 那天我们都拉钩发誓绝不承认 |
[13:19] | we crossed Ebola with the common cold. | 我们曾让埃博拉病毒和伤寒病毒结合 |
[13:24] | Why the hell | 你们为什么要 |
[13:24] | would you cross Ebola with the common cold? | 让埃博拉病毒和伤寒病毒结合 |
[13:28] | We never did. | 我们没有啊 |
[13:29] | That would be a terrible, terrible thing. | 那样就太可怕了 |
[13:34] | Hi. Sorry I’m late– I was at the gym. | 大家好 抱歉迟到了 我从健身房来 |
[13:36] | Spin class– worked up quite a sweat. | 动感训练课 真出了不少汗呢 |
[13:43] | Joy, this is Leonard. Leonard, this is Joy. | 乔伊 这是莱纳德 莱纳德 这是乔伊 |
[13:45] | – Hi. – Hi. | -好啊 -好 |
[13:46] | You don’t look like a genius. | 你真没有天才相 |
[13:48] | Go ahead, say something smart. | 来 说点有才的给姐听听 |
[13:49] | Uh… Aah! Time’s up. | 啊哈 时间到 |
[13:52] | Just kidding. | 开玩笑啦 |
[13:53] | First thing you need to know about me: | 你需要了解我的第一件事就是 |
[13:55] | I’m hilarious. | 我超搞笑的 |
[13:58] | Yeah. | 看出来了 |
[14:01] | So, Bernadette tells me | 伯纳黛特告诉我 |
[14:02] | she knows you from self-defense classes? | 你们是在自卫课上认识的 |
[14:04] | Yeah. Israeli Krav Maga. | 没错 以色列格斗术 |
[14:06] | Lots of fun. | 可好玩了 |
[14:07] | Basically, a hundred different ways | 基本上是学了一百种不同的 |
[14:09] | to rip a guy’s nuts off. | 扯下男人蛋蛋的方式 |
[14:12] | Wow. Wouldn’t think there’d be that many. | 天呐 没想到这么多啊 |
[14:14] | Number 42! | 四十二招 |
[14:15] | Whoa! | 天呐 |
[14:17] | Isn’t she a pip? | 多可爱的姑娘啊 |
[14:26] | Proxima Centauri’s the nearest star. | 比邻星是最近的星星 |
[14:29] | The celestial bodies that follow are | 接下来的天体顺次是 |
[14:32] | Alpha Centauri A, Toli, | 半人马座艾尔法A星 托里星[B星] |
[14:35] | Barnard’s Star, | 伯纳德星 |
[14:36] | Wolf 359… | 沃尔夫359星 |
[14:43] | Lalande 21185, | 拉兰德21185星 |
[14:45] | Sirius A, Sirius B, | 天狼星A 天狼星B[双星] |
[14:48] | BL-Ceti, UV-Ceti, | 鲸鱼座BL星 鲸鱼座UV星 |
[14:51] | Ross 154… | 罗斯154星 |
[14:53] | Ross 248… | 罗斯248星 |
[14:57] | Epsilon Eridani, | 天苑四星 |
[14:59] | Lac-9352, | 拉卡伊9352星 |
[15:01] | Ross 128, | 罗斯128星 |
[15:02] | Procyon A… | 南河三A |
[15:04] | Oh, darn, that’s wrong! | 见鬼 错了 |
[15:12] | EZ Aquarii A, | 宝瓶座鲁坦星A |
[15:14] | EZ Aquarii B, | 宝瓶座鲁坦星B |
[15:16] | EZ Aquarii C, | 宝瓶座鲁坦星C |
[15:19] | Procyon A. | 南河三A |
[15:23] | Those are the stars that are nearest to me. | 这些是离我最近的恒星 |
[15:25] | Tra-la-la and fiddle-dee-dee. | 一闪一闪那么地亮晶晶 |
[15:32] | Oh, dear. | 天呐 |
[15:35] | They really do be crazy. | 妞儿们真是疯了 |
[15:44] | This lobster’s good on the way down | 这龙虾口感十足 |
[15:46] | and the way up. | 也回味无穷啊 |
[15:49] | Should be– it’s $30 a pound. | 应该的 一磅要30大洋呢 |
[15:52] | Hey, this is a date, right? | 这算是约会吧 |
[15:57] | Yep, it is. | 没错 |
[15:58] | 73! | 第73招 |
[16:01] | Excuse me, I have to go to the little girls’ room… | 不好意思 我要去一下洗手间 |
[16:04] | and take a wicked whiz. | 好好地通体舒畅一下 |
[16:07] | I’ll go with you. | 我也一起去 |
[16:08] | Fair warning– I had the asparagus. | 友情提醒 我刚吃了芦笋 |
[16:10] | My pea is gonna stink up the place. | 我排泄出来的芦笋宝宝们会让这地方臭气熏天 |
[16:15] | I think she likes you. | 我觉得她喜欢你耶 |
[16:21] | EZ Aquarii B… | 宝瓶座鲁坦星B |
[16:24] | EZ Aquarii C… | 宝瓶座鲁坦星C |
[16:34] | Excuse me, madam. | 借过一下 女士 |
[16:37] | Sheldon? | 谢尔顿 |
[16:40] | Rats! | 靠 |
[16:42] | I believe a misunderstanding may have occurred | 我请你去见我母亲这事 |
[16:44] | when I asked you to meet my mother. | 我想你可能有点误会 |
[16:46] | No misunderstanding. | 我没误会 |
[16:48] | I’ve learned what that request actually means, | 我了解到那个要求意味着什么 |
[16:51] | and I don’t want to be joined to another object | 我不想变成一个斜面绕轴 |
[16:53] | by an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis. | 螺旋状转上几圈之后的样子 |
[16:57] | In what way are you screwed? | 谁说你完蛋了 |
[17:01] | All I want to do is present you as my boyfriend to my mother | 我只是想把你当作男友介绍给我妈 |
[17:03] | so she’ll be satisfied that I’m in a relationship. | 让她相信我在恋爱 好让她放心 |
[17:07] | So we’d be perpetrating a ruse? | 这么说我们是要做戏咯 |
[17:09] | Precisely. | 一点没错 |
[17:10] | And you haven’t fallen hopelessly in love with me? | 你没有无可救药地爱上我吗 |
[17:14] | Don’t be absurd. | 别傻了 |
[17:17] | I find the notion of romantic love | 在我看来 爱情关系 |
[17:18] | to be an unnecessary cultural construct | 是种毫无必要的文化构造 |
[17:20] | that adds no value to human relationships. | 对人类关系毫无价值可言 |
[17:24] | Amy Farrah Fowler, that’s the most pragmatic thing | 艾米·菲拉·福勒 这是我听过的 |
[17:26] | anyone has ever said to me. | 最务实的话了 |
[17:29] | I trust this clarification allows us to return | 既然误会已经澄清了 |
[17:31] | to boy-slash-friend-slash-girl-slash-friend status. | 我们该回到男性朋友和女性朋友关系了吧 |
[17:34] | Of course. | 当然 |
[17:36] | Would you like to join me for Chinese food? | 想和我一起去吃中餐么 |
[17:38] | Sheldon, please, you’re suffocating me. | 拜托 谢尔顿 别逼我 |
[17:43] | My apologies. | 不好意思 |
[17:44] | – Good night, Amy. – Good night, Sheldon. | -晚安 艾米 -晚安 谢尔顿 |
[17:48] | Come on, just give her a chance. | 别这样 给她个机会 |
[17:50] | Maybe she’ll grow on you. | 也许你会慢慢喜欢上她 |
[17:52] | or maybe she’ll finally succeed in ripping my nuts off. | 也可能她最终成功扯下了我的蛋蛋 |
[17:57] | There are still 93 ways she hasn’t tried yet. | 毕竟还有93种办法她没尝试过呢 |
[18:01] | Look, H-Howard, I appreciate the effort, | 听着 霍华德 谢谢你的好意 |
[18:03] | but this is, like, the worst date of my life. | 但这是我经历过的最烂一次约会了 |
[18:06] | Seriously? | 真的假的 |
[18:06] | I was once robbed by a pre-op transsexual I met on J-Date, | 我被个在犹太交友网上的准变性人给抢了 |
[18:10] | and that didn’t even crack my top ten. | 这种约会甚至都排不进我的最烂前十 |
[18:14] | I guess the difference is, I have some self-respect. | 我觉得区别在于 我懂得自重 |
[18:17] | Not that I’ve ever seen. | 我怎么不记得你有 |
[18:19] | It’s relatively new. | 最近才有的 |
[18:22] | I just know that | 我只是认识到 |
[18:23] | I’m not gonna spend time with someone I don’t like | 我不想就为了能有个女友 |
[18:25] | simply to have a girlfriend. | 而和不喜欢的女生在一起 |
[18:27] | I’m okay on my own. | 我一个人也挺好 |
[18:28] | Good news– I made lots of room for dessert. | 好消息 我的胃腾够空间来吃甜食了 |
[18:33] | Look, uh, Joy, it was nice to meet you, but… | 听着 乔伊 很高兴认识你 但… |
[18:36] | Yeah, you, too. Hey, you got anything for next weekend? | 我也是 你下周末有空么 |
[18:38] | I need a date for my cousin’s wedding. | 我表兄结婚 我要带个伴去 |
[18:41] | You’re asking me out? | 你在约我出去吗 |
[18:42] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
[18:42] | And it’s an open bar, | 酒啊什么的免费畅饮哦 |
[18:44] | so I’ll probably be giving it away. | 说不定可以酒后那什么一下 |
[18:49] | I look forward to it. | 我很期待 |
[18:58] | It’s nice to meet you, too, Sheldon. | 我也很高兴认识你 谢尔顿 |
[19:00] | I honestly didn’t believe Amy | 艾米告诉我她有个男友时 |
[19:02] | when she told me she had a boyfriend. | 我真的难以置信 |
[19:05] | I assure you I’m quite real. | 我向你保证 我是有血有肉的真人 |
[19:07] | and I’m having regular intercourse with your daughter. | 我和你女儿有着常规性交行为 |
[19:13] | What? | 啥 |
[19:14] | Oh, yes. | 是的 |
[19:15] | We’re like wild animals in heat. | 我们就如同发情期的野生动物 |
[19:18] | It’s a wonder neither of us has been hurt. | 我们居然还完好无损 真是奇迹 |
[19:22] | Amy… what is he saying? | 艾米 他在说什么 |
[19:25] | You wanted me to have a boyfriend, Mother. | 你希望我交个男友 妈妈 |
[19:27] | Well, here he is. | 这就是我的男友 |
[19:32] | Have to sign off now. | 现在我得下线了 |
[19:34] | My hunger for Sheldon is stirring in my loins. | 我对谢尔顿的欲望已让我的花径颤抖 |
[19:37] | Oh, yes, it’s time for me to make love | 是的 我是时候该去 |
[19:40] | to your daughter’s vagina. | 你女儿的阴道里做爱一番了 |
[19:47] | Thank you, Sheldon, that went very well. | 多谢 谢尔顿 效果不错 |
[19:49] | Agreed. | 同感 |
[19:50] | Amy, I find myself wondering | 艾米 我禁不住这样想 |
[19:52] | if we should actually engage in coitus | 我们在交往过程中 |
[19:55] | at least one time in our relationship. | 至少该真的性交一次试试 |
[19:58] | Bazinga. | 逗你玩 |
[20:02] | Bedtime. Please show yourself out. | 该睡觉了 你也该走了 |