| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:22] | Some people use it, like, to settle their stomach. If you… | |
| [00:25] | Happy Father’s Day, mothers! | |
| [00:27] | – Hey. – Hi, hi, hi. | |
| [00:29] | – Oh, you made bruschetta? – Hi, lovely. | |
| [00:31] | – I’m making bruschetta. – Oh, hey there, Sunny. | |
| [00:34] | My ex is with Hiya’s ex. This is Hiya. | |
| [00:36] | – Oh, hi. – Uh, Chaya. | |
| [00:37] | – Chaya. – Hiya. | |
| [00:39] | Chaya. It’s a hard C-H. | |
| [00:41] | Hard. Like, uh, | |
| [00:42] | challah French toast. Chaya. | |
| [00:45] | Hiya. | |
| [00:47] | I can’t with these shiksas. | |
| [00:49] | Hiya just got separated, too. | |
| [00:51] | – Our husbands work together. – Ex-husbands. | |
| [00:53] | – Ex-husband. Get used to saying it. – No. | |
| [00:55] | I’m not saying it. | |
| [00:56] | He’s just having a moment. He’s coming back. | |
| [00:58] | I got to believe he’s coming back. | |
| [01:00] | That’s what I thought in the beginning. | |
| [01:01] | – Ha! – Okay, | |
| [01:02] | – just reminding everyone. – Yeah, right. Exactly. | |
| [01:05] | Lesbian. Single mom. | |
| [01:07] | Every mom is a single mom. | |
| [01:09] | No, no. Real single mom, | |
| [01:11] | not divorced single mom. | |
| [01:13] | Stop bragging. | |
| [01:16] | So, where are your kids? | |
| [01:17] | – Jeff took them camping. – Mmm. | |
| [01:19] | His mantra is to be the best dad and ex-husband | |
| [01:23] | he possibly can be. | |
| [01:25] | That’s so annoying. | |
| [01:28] | Wait, why? | |
| [01:30] | Why? Why? | |
| [01:33] | Because of the years. | |
| [01:36] | Do you know how many years we spent | |
| [01:38] | sitting at the kitchen table | |
| [01:40] | with you crying over him | |
| [01:42] | and me begging for you to leave him? | |
| [01:45] | Five years. | |
| [01:47] | Five. | |
| [01:48] | Five years. | |
| [01:49] | You were tortured, and now that | |
| [01:51] | he’s not your problem anymore, he’s amazing. | |
| [01:54] | I know. It’s crazy, | |
| [01:56] | but we’re really happier | |
| [01:59] | than we ever have been, and we’re working on being | |
| [02:01] | the best exes we can be to each other. | |
| [02:04] | – Why is that…? – That’s-that’s great. | |
| [02:06] | Good for you, I guess. I just… | |
| [02:08] | I just can’t ever do something like that. | |
| [02:12] | That’s not… | |
| [02:14] | That’s big. | |
| [02:19] | Oh. | |
| [02:21] | This is happening because of you. | |
| [02:25] | You got me through the dark days. | |
| [02:28] | Oh, man. | |
| [02:31] | It’s my job. | |
| [02:32] | Don’t forget, okay? | |
| [02:34] | Never forget. | |
| [02:36] | Damn. I wanted to be like Jennifer Garner. | |
| [02:39] | She’s the number one best ex-wife in the world. | |
| [02:42] | She’s so pretty. She cooks. | |
| [02:44] | – You cook. – How does she get over it? | |
| [02:47] | He shtups the nanny, he breaks his sobriety, | |
| [02:49] | she jumps in the car, she drives him to rehab, | |
| [02:52] | and now they all go on vacations together with the kids. | |
| [02:55] | I’m gonna be sick. | |
| [02:57] | And she composts and makes her own honey | |
| [03:00] | and probably mead and… | |
| [03:02] | I love her hair. | |
| [03:11] | We were having a honeymoon of a divorce. | |
| [03:16] | We were gonna handle | |
| [03:17] | the whole thing ourselves on the Internet. | |
| [03:19] | – Okay. This is mediators. – Mediators. But I’m gonna… | |
| [03:21] | – But we-we can do it online. – Mediators are here. Lawyers… Yeah. | |
| [03:24] | What are we gonna do with our rings? | |
| [03:26] | – I guess I never got that far. – Hock them. | |
| [03:28] | We can hock them, yeah. | |
| [03:29] | We were gonna live, like, on a compound | |
| [03:32] | and raise the girls together. | |
| [03:35] | Then his mother got into his head. | |
| [03:42] | He’s ready for you. | |
| [03:52] | So, | |
| [03:54] | you’re LeBron, and this is the key. | |
| [03:56] | But you can’t get through, you can’t get through. | |
| [03:58] | So what do you do? | |
| [04:00] | Basketball not your sport? | |
| [04:03] | How’s this? Divorce… | |
| [04:06] | is like hockey. | |
| [04:08] | You have face-offs and fights, | |
| [04:11] | goals, heroes, villains. | |
| [04:13] | But the kids are the puck. | |
| [04:16] | Can we do soccer? | |
| [04:18] | I don’t know soccer. | |
| [04:20] | Let me make this easy. | |
| [04:22] | You make more money than he does. | |
| [04:24] | So? | |
| [04:25] | So, in the words of the immortal Jim Morrison, | |
| [04:30] | come on, baby, settle. | |
| [04:32] | Let’s settle. | |
| [04:44] | And I’ve been paying ever since. | |
| [04:47] | Did I tell you that Tom | |
| [04:49] | now refers to his 25-year-old girlfriend | |
| [04:52] | – as his soul mate? – Ew. | |
| [04:54] | How fun is that. | |
| [04:55] | So, when he was 30, a baby was born | |
| [04:57] | with part of his soul, and now he has sex with it? | |
| [05:00] | Yeah. | |
| [05:02] | Someone please tell me why the hell | |
| [05:03] | she’d want to be with him. | |
| [05:05] | He has a cyst on his left testicle | |
| [05:06] | that swells in the heat. | |
| [05:07] | He has to constantly ice | |
| [05:09] | his old balls in the summer. | |
| [05:11] | – No! – I’m eating. | |
| [05:13] | I cannot wait till he has his second family after 60. | |
| [05:16] | I hope they’re twins, and I hope that maybe | |
| [05:19] | coaching all their sports and shit will kill him. | |
| [05:21] | Baruch Hashem. | |
| [05:22] | – Baruch Hashem. – Baruch Hashem. | |
| [05:25] | – Baruch Hashem. – Cheers to that. | |
| [05:27] | Least you know why he left. | |
| [05:29] | Yeah, Richard swears up and down it’s not another woman. | |
| [05:32] | I don’t even understand what happened. | |
| [05:35] | I thought we were happy. | |
| [05:40] | And I don’t know how | |
| [05:41] | – I’m gonna live without him. – Oh, baby. | |
| [05:44] | Oh, man. | |
| [05:46] | Okay. Circle. | |
| [05:48] | Do you want a Xanax? | |
| [05:50] | Yes, I do. | |
| [05:51] | – How many? – Three. | |
| [05:53] | – Good. – Is that all? | |
| [05:57] | The doctor is in. | |
| [06:01] | Widows are so lucky. | |
| [06:03] | Sam. | |
| [06:04] | – I’m just saying. – We don’t all hate them. Stop. | |
| [06:07] | What? | |
| [06:08] | You know, Ari wasn’t perfect. | |
| [06:10] | And to be fair, | |
| [06:13] | I was the one who cheated on him. | |
| [06:16] | Thank God we ended it before it went too far south. | |
| [06:20] | Did you know the whole time | |
| [06:23] | that he was gay? | |
| [06:26] | Gay? | |
| [06:29] | Ari’s not gay. | |
| [06:31] | No, I know. | |
| [06:36] | This kills me. | |
| [06:37] | I got to tell you this before he gets here. | |
| [06:39] | Tom wants to know what brand of sheets I buy. | |
| [06:41] | – What? – This dude. | |
| [06:42] | Does he want me to, like, put roses on his pillows | |
| [06:44] | before he gets home to go to bed? | |
| [06:46] | – You’re not texting him back. – But then I’m a dick | |
| [06:48] | because I’m icing him out on Father’s Day. | |
| [06:50] | – I like it. – Ice his balls. | |
| [06:52] | Ice his balls, baby. | |
| [06:54] | Ugh, can we stop talking about balls? | |
| [06:56] | Yeah. | |
| [06:58] | Wait a second. Wait a second. | |
| [07:00] | He’s coming here? | |
| [07:01] | He’s dropping off the twins. | |
| [07:03] | Okay. The fun never stops, even when we get rid of him. | |
| [07:14] | Hey, Sam. | |
| [07:15] | Hi. | |
| [07:16] | – Smells good in here. – Thank you. | |
| [07:21] | Are you staying? | |
| [07:23] | I know you like hanging out at lady gatherings. | |
| [07:26] | Just dropping off the kids. | |
| [07:28] | On Father’s Day. | |
| [07:30] | Nice. | |
| [07:32] | I spent the entire day with them. | |
| [07:34] | W-Was that a whole four hours | |
| [07:37] | with your own kids? | |
| [07:39] | Impressive. Hmm. | |
| [07:41] | You’ve always been gunning for me. | |
| [07:42] | Wh-What is your problem? | |
| [07:46] | You’re a terrible husband. | |
| [07:50] | How do you know? | |
| [07:53] | Lala tells me everything. | |
| [07:57] | She does? | |
| [07:59] | Mm-hmm. | |
| [08:00] | Did she tell you how | |
| [08:02] | when the twins were born, she got so depressed | |
| [08:04] | she could barely take care of them? | |
| [08:06] | I-I know about that. | |
| [08:08] | That was… that was hard. | |
| [08:11] | Yeah. Uh, yeah. | |
| [08:12] | That-that was hard, Sam. | |
| [08:15] | Do you know that when her mom died, | |
| [08:17] | she just never bounced back? | |
| [08:19] | That I begged her to get help, but she refused? | |
| [08:22] | And do you know she hasn’t let me touch her in two years? | |
| [08:26] | She tell you that? | |
| [08:31] | Yes, I finally called it, | |
| [08:34] | but this has been a long time coming. | |
| [08:37] | You may not like me, and that’s fine, | |
| [08:40] | but you have no idea what my story is, | |
| [08:42] | and you have no right to judge someone else’s marriage. | |
| [08:49] | You’ve been divorced a long time now. | |
| [08:51] | – Don’t you worry? – About what? | |
| [08:54] | Your bitterness. | |
| [08:55] | You’re getting brittle and hard. | |
| [08:59] | It’s not a good look on you, Sam. | |
| [09:08] | Yeah, well, at least I don’t have to ice my balls | |
| [09:10] | when it’s hot outside! | |
| [09:22] | – Okay. – Are you okay? | |
| [09:24] | Yeah, I was gonna walk and see you. | |
| [09:26] | – Pretty good, so I won’t move around. – Yeah. | |
| [09:29] | We got married when we were 18. | |
| [09:33] | At 21, he started being very, very mean to me. | |
| [09:39] | But… in those days, | |
| [09:41] | you didn’t get divorced. | |
| [09:43] | So you stayed together until you were 90? | |
| [09:45] | You know, it seemed the best thing to do | |
| [09:48] | would be just to stay there and not leave. | |
| [09:52] | And, uh, I was, I was going to be dying soon anyway. | |
| [09:55] | And so was he. | |
| [09:58] | But when we both turned 90, | |
| [10:01] | I just had had enough. | |
| [10:04] | So… | |
| [10:07] | I left him. | |
| [10:09] | And that was 17 years ago. | |
| [10:12] | And these have been the happiest | |
| [10:15] | 17 years of my entire life. | |
| [10:21] | All right, Pearl! | |
| [10:23] | Thatta girl. | |
| [10:24] | Okay, baby! | |
| [10:28] | Did you get all that? | |
| [10:30] | Isn’t she great? | |
| [10:37] | I am the patron saint of divorced children. | |
| [10:41] | And if you have any questions, you ask me. | |
| [10:45] | I’m here to give you free legal advice. | |
| [10:47] | Now, if the divorce is new, | |
| [10:49] | there’s gonna be a honeymoon period. | |
| [10:51] | Ziva? | |
| [10:52] | What’s a honeymoon period? | |
| [10:54] | Well, it’s not an actual honeymoon, | |
| [10:56] | but it’s when the… | |
| [10:57] | What, Andi? | |
| [10:58] | I haven’t gotten my period yet. | |
| [11:03] | Womp, womp, womp. | |
| [11:07] | ♪ He talks about you in his sleep ♪ | |
| [11:09] | ♪ There’s nothing I can do to keep ♪ | |
| [11:12] | ♪ From crying when he calls ♪ | |
| [11:14] | ♪ Your name, Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:17] | ♪ Jolene, Jolene, Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:21] | ♪ Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:24] | ♪ I’m begging of you, please don’t take my man ♪ | |
| [11:27] | ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ | |
| [11:29] | ♪ Jolene, Jolene, Jolene, Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:33] | ♪ Jolene, Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:36] | ♪ Please don’t take him just because you can ♪ | |
| [11:40] | – ♪ Don’t do it ♪ – ♪ Don’t take him ♪ | |
| [11:42] | – ♪ Don’t take him away ♪ – ♪ Don’t take him ♪ | |
| [11:50] | ♪ Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:52] | ♪ Jolene, Jolene ♪ | |
| [11:54] | ♪ Jolene… ♪ | |
| [11:59] | Yes! | |
| [12:00] | Oh, my God. | |
| [12:02] | – That was beautiful. – That was cathartic. | |
| [12:04] | Oh, that felt good! | |
| [12:07] | – Crossing over. – How talented. | |
| [12:09] | – What about you? – Not that talented. | |
| [12:14] | So who are you dating, Sam? | |
| [12:16] | What? Oh. | |
| [12:18] | No. | |
| [12:19] | I don’t. I’m on a time-out. | |
| [12:21] | I don’t play well with others. | |
| [12:24] | – All right. – If this doesn’t work out, | |
| [12:26] | I am going to have spend every other Christmas totally alone. | |
| [12:29] | Well, you could always come to my house and watch | |
| [12:32] | me and Murray fight with the cat over the tinsel, huh? | |
| [12:35] | I’m getting a drink. | |
| [12:36] | Why, no? | |
| [12:37] | – No, you come to mine. – You come to mine. | |
| [12:39] | – Or hers, see? – All good. | |
| [12:41] | I think it’s a good offer. | |
| [12:43] | Can I come to your house for Christmas? | |
| [12:47] | Done. | |
| [12:50] | The title of my speech is called | |
| [12:52] | “Divorce: The Gift that Keeps on Giving.” | |
| [12:54] | Did you know that as children of divorced families | |
| [12:56] | we’re 50% as likely to grow up and get divorced ourselves? | |
| [12:59] | So if you get divorced in your future, | |
| [13:01] | blame your mom and dad. | |
| [13:03] | Our next speaker is the Fox family accountant, | |
| [13:06] | Mr. Rey Rodriguez. | |
| [13:10] | Hey, guys. | |
| [13:11] | Just a heads-up, I was raised by a single mom. | |
| [13:14] | Never even knew my dad. | |
| [13:15] | – I don’t know my dad, either. – My man. | |
| [13:17] | That’s what’s up. Yeah. | |
| [13:20] | Okay, so as far as money goes, | |
| [13:22] | there’s only a few things you need to know right now. | |
| [13:24] | First of all, there’s a simple rule | |
| [13:27] | called the 20-50-30, all right? | |
| [13:31] | Let’s say you make a dollar. | |
| [13:33] | You save 20 cents, | |
| [13:35] | you spend 50 cents on something you need | |
| [13:37] | and 30 cents on something you want. | |
| [13:39] | – You. – Do you have any tips | |
| [13:41] | of how to stop your mom from crying all the time? | |
| [13:44] | Just give her a hug. | |
| [13:46] | Anybody here have a bank account? | |
| [13:48] | Because I came to talk about money. | |
| [13:50] | – We’re kids. – So what? | |
| [13:52] | You want to retire before you’re 85? | |
| [13:54] | ‘Cause that shit’s real. | |
| [14:00] | I can’t wait till Murray starts smoking weed | |
| [14:02] | – so I can stop hiding from him. – Mm. | |
| [14:06] | Come here. I’m gonna shotgun you. | |
| [14:10] | Open your mouth. | |
| [14:18] | May I join you? | |
| [14:20] | What was that thing you were doing? | |
| [14:21] | Looked very fun. | |
| [14:23] | I’d like to try that. | |
| [14:25] | – Sure. – Gran? | |
| [14:26] | Gran, let’s go. Come on. | |
| [14:28] | You said we were going somewhere special. | |
| [14:30] | Oh, bollocks. | |
| [14:57] | During the Shah’s reign, | |
| [14:59] | the British-owned oil industry was nationalized. | |
| [15:01] | That was his first mistake that he made | |
| [15:03] | that led to the revolution. | |
| [15:05] | I’m very impressed, miss. | |
| [15:07] | How do you know so much about Persian history? | |
| [15:09] | Ubers… you see, I like to talk to people. | |
| [15:12] | And 99% of the time, they like to talk to me. | |
| [15:14] | There’s so much to be learned from Uber drivers about… | |
| [15:19] | Too much water. | |
| [15:21] | I asked for half a glass. | |
| [15:28] | Oh, my God, Nan! | |
| [15:30] | What?! It’s a waste. | |
| [15:32] | Well, yeah, but now he has to go and pour it out… | |
| [15:39] | Persian. | |
| [15:42] | They use that word to distinguish themselves | |
| [15:44] | from the theocratic Iranians back home. | |
| [15:47] | It’s nonsense. | |
| [15:48] | They should call themselves Iranians. | |
| [15:49] | Persia hasn’t existed since 1935. | |
| [15:57] | So who wants to go next? | |
| [16:18] | “Dear Ari, | |
| [16:20] | “I am sorry I cheated on you. | |
| [16:23] | “I just had to get out of the marriage. | |
| [16:25] | “I was so unhappy. | |
| [16:29] | “I don’t think I ever loved you. | |
| [16:34] | “There was so much pressure put on me | |
| [16:36] | “by my family to get married and have kids, | |
| [16:39] | “and you were kind and handsome, | |
| [16:41] | “and so I said yes without a thought. | |
| [16:44] | “Please forgive me. | |
| [16:46] | “I hope you find a woman | |
| [16:47] | who will love you and our kids.” | |
| [17:06] | “Dear Richard, | |
| [17:08] | “Out of everyone in the world, I chose you. | |
| [17:11] | “And in choosing you, I wasn’t only saying this is my man. | |
| [17:15] | “I was also saying | |
| [17:18] | “this is me. | |
| [17:21] | “I trust myself enough to know | |
| [17:23] | “what is right for me, what I need, | |
| [17:26] | “what I say yes to in life. | |
| [17:29] | “Marrying you was the greatest validation | |
| [17:31] | “of the trust I have in myself. | |
| [17:34] | “Which is why this is so painful. | |
| [17:36] | “I question myself. | |
| [17:38] | “I don’t trust myself anymore. | |
| [17:40] | “I’ve lost my compass. | |
| [17:44] | “I forgive you. | |
| [17:47] | “I do, and I’ll never stop loving you. | |
| [17:49] | “But it’s going to take a long time | |
| [17:51] | before I’ll be able to forgive myself.” | |
| [18:01] | “Tom, | |
| [18:03] | “I’m glad I finally found the courage | |
| [18:06] | “to move on from a relationship that was going nowhere. | |
| [18:10] | “For the sake of myself and our kids. | |
| [18:14] | “I’m livid not only that you moved on so fast, | |
| [18:19] | “but that it’s with someone that hasn’t got | |
| [18:22] | “the physical, emotional and neurological challenges | |
| [18:27] | “that I do. | |
| [18:28] | “Now your life will be so much easier, | |
| [18:31] | “and you won’t have to face | |
| [18:32] | “all those disappointments we’ve discussed for years. | |
| [18:36] | “But, hey… | |
| [18:38] | I just have to remind myself that neither do I.” | |
| [18:52] | “I will never forget watching “The Matrix” with you | |
| [18:54] | “and being so worried you wouldn’t get it, | |
| [18:57] | but you did. | |
| [18:59] | “I remember loving you so much at that moment. | |
| [19:02] | “Then we had some dark days. | |
| [19:04] | “I felt so unwanted, so rejected. | |
| [19:08] | “I know it was your insecurity, | |
| [19:10] | “but I just couldn’t take it. | |
| [19:12] | “I don’t know our future, but I do know I’m glad | |
| [19:15] | – you are their dad.” – Oh. | |
| [19:17] | “I forgive you. | |
| [19:19] | Let us both live in our truth.” | |
| [19:54] | Sam? | |
| [19:56] | Oof. | |
| [20:04] | Y-You know what? | |
| [20:05] | I think I-I… I think I… | |
| [20:08] | I want to read mine. | |
| [20:09] | I think I should. | |
| [20:16] | “Dear Hitler and Hitler’s son, | |
| [20:20] | “Why aren’t you dead yet? | |
| [20:21] | “How are you? How is your day? | |
| [20:24] | “How do you live with yourself? | |
| [20:27] | “I don’t care how you treat me, but what about your kids? | |
| [20:31] | “How do you divorce your own kids? | |
| [20:33] | “They’re the best thing that ever happened to both of us. | |
| [20:36] | “Wondering how you sleep at night and why you aren’t dead. | |
| [20:40] | Love, Sam.” | |
| [20:48] | Oh. Okay. | |
| [20:53] | I got to let this shit go. | |
| [20:56] | – Mm-hmm. Yeah. – Let this shit go. | |
| [20:58] | – Let this shit go. Just… – That’s a good idea. | |
| [21:01] | There we go. | |
| [21:03] | – Yeah. – Yes. | |
| [21:04] | – Yeah. – Oh, that’s-that’s a beauty. | |
| [21:06] | – Get a good burn. – That’s a beauty right there. | |
| [21:08] | – Burn it. – It needs to get out. | |
| [21:10] | – Go from under. – Bye. | |
| [21:11] | – Yeah. – Bye. | |
| [21:13] | Out, damn spot! | |
| [22:03] | _ | |
| [22:05] | _ | |
| [22:21] | Look what the girls texted me. | |
| [22:24] | Little pumpkins. | |
| [22:25] | Oh, my God. | |
| [22:28] | Happy Father’s Day. | |
| [22:30] | Oh, happy Father’s Day, Father. | |
| [22:38] | You excited for your party? | |
| [22:41] | You gonna speak Spebrew or Hebrish or whatever? | |
| [22:48] | You know, when I was growing up, | |
| [22:50] | my father was hardly ever around. | |
| [22:53] | My parents stayed married, but my mother raised us all. | |
| [22:57] | Every mother is a single mother, you know. | |
| [23:00] | She worked three jobs, | |
| [23:03] | and he didn’t have fuck all to do with us. | |
| [23:07] | One morning, I was walking across the square, | |
| [23:09] | and I looked up, and there was my father | |
| [23:12] | holding hands with a woman. | |
| [23:15] | He turned as white as a ghost. | |
| [23:17] | He dropped the hand of the woman. | |
| [23:19] | It wasn’t my mother’s hand, you see. | |
| [23:22] | He walked over to me. | |
| [23:24] | “Phil,” he said. | |
| [23:27] | “Yes, Father.” | |
| [23:30] | He handed me a sixpence, and I went on my way. | |
| [23:34] | We never spoke of it. | |
| [23:39] | I tried to call my dad today to say “Happy Father’s Day,” | |
| [23:42] | but his voice mail was full. | |
| [23:45] | That was very generous of you. | |
| [23:47] | You know, I don’t not want to have a relationship | |
| [23:51] | with my dad. | |
| [23:53] | You know, I don’t want to live out this, like, | |
| [23:54] | legacy of shitty dads generationally or whatever. | |
| [23:59] | You know… Well, I hope you know… | |
| [24:02] | It’s most likely that he won’t show up for your party. | |
| [24:04] | I don’t care. Gran, stop. | |
| [24:11] | All right. | |
| [24:13] | I got something I want to give you for your bat-whatever, | |
| [24:15] | but I don’t want to give it to you at the party | |
| [24:17] | and get it lost in all the kerfuffle. | |
| [24:32] | – Oh, my God. – Mm. | |
| [24:33] | It’s real gold. | |
| [24:35] | Gran. | |
| [24:37] | It belonged to my grandfather. | |
| [24:39] | He was a bit of a tosspot, but I loved him. | |
| [24:43] | – It’s beautiful. – Mm. | |
| [24:46] | – I love it. – You do? | |
| [24:54] | Aw. | |
| [24:56] | Thank you. | |
| [24:59] | One bun, two buns, three buns, | |
| [25:01] | four buns, five buns. This is bun six. | |
| [25:04] | – I think I got it right this time. – Okay. | |
| [25:10] | I… it’s… I-I don’t even know. | |
| [25:12] | I mean, she’s-she’s so strict, and, like, | |
| [25:14] | there can’t even be a hair out of place. | |
| [25:17] | Like, it has to be glued down. | |
| [25:19] | Okay, come back. I’ll put more gel in it. | |
| [25:23] | Duke, is Mom making you go? | |
| [25:25] | No, no. I want to go. | |
| [25:27] | You should’ve seen her. She was so pissed | |
| [25:28] | – after I gave up soccer. – What did she say? | |
| [25:30] | But it’s not like she was the one that had to do it. | |
| [25:32] | – Like, it’s my choice. – Yeah, if you don’t want | |
| [25:34] | to do soccer, you don’t have to do soccer. | |
| [25:37] | What’s up? | |
| [25:39] | What’s going on? | |
| [25:50] | We just want to be with the sisters now. | |
| [25:54] | Copy that. | |
| [25:56] | Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Cool. | |
| [25:59] | Okay. | |
| [26:02] | – It’s nice, though… – There. | |
| [26:06] | … that you guys have sisters. | |
| [26:09] | So, you got this? | |
| [26:10] | – Mm-hmm. Yeah. – Right? I’ll just… | |
| [26:12] | I’ll just go throw myself off the side of the freeway. | |
| [26:15] | – Ooh, fun. – Yes. | |
| [26:18] | To the garbage with me! | |
| [26:21] | Don’t worry about this. | |
| [26:22] | I just, you know… ah… I have a better idea. | |
| [26:25] | I’m going to chop myself up into little pieces | |
| [26:28] | and flush myself down the toilet. | |
| [26:31] | That’s the natural place for me to go. | |
| [26:34] | And, uh, you guys better hope | |
| [26:38] | that I flush myself down super toilet. | |
| [26:42] | Otherwise, I will clog up | |
| [26:45] | the regular toilets, and you guys… | |
| [26:48] | All right, bye, Mom. | |
| [26:49] | … don’t even know how to use a plunger. | |
| [26:51] | I don’t think you’ve ever touched one or… | |
| [26:55] | know how to spell it, but that’s fine. | |
| [26:59] | I have stuff to do. | |
| [27:02] | I can go do stuff. | |
| [27:05] | Frankie?! | |
| [27:07] | I mean, we can hang out. | |
| [27:10] | It’s cool. | |
| [27:12] | It’s nice sisters want to be together with no mom. | |
| [27:15] | That’s fine. | |
| [27:18] | That’s cute. My work here is done. | |
| [27:20] | It’s obviously done. | |
| [27:23] | Nobody needs me anymore. | |
| [27:26] | That’s fine. Cool. |