| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [04:13] | Whoa! | |
| [04:17] | – Hi. Dude. Mom. – Hey. | |
| [04:19] | I missed you so much. | |
| [04:21] | Oh, you did? | |
| [04:24] | – Baby. – Oh, ew. | |
| [04:25] | – Mom, don’t. – Oh, sorry. | |
| [04:27] | – Yes. Yes, sir. – Okay. | |
| [04:28] | I missed… Yes. | |
| [04:29] | I missed… Very good. Hello. | |
| [04:32] | Who is that? | |
| [04:34] | – Hi, Mom. – Who is this? | |
| [04:36] | – Hi, Gran. – Who is this? | |
| [04:39] | I missed you so much. | |
| [04:40] | I missed you. | |
| [04:42] | I brought presents. | |
| [04:43] | – You did?! – Yeah. | |
| [04:45] | Cute! | |
| [04:46] | Hi, Gran the man. | |
| [04:49] | – What? – Slow down. | |
| [04:50] | – Oh. I’m sorry, Gran. – Oh, come on. | |
| [04:52] | I forgot about your life jacket. | |
| [04:54] | Never mind. | |
| [04:56] | – Hello, darling. – Hi, Gran. | |
| [04:58] | – I missed you. – Aw. | |
| [04:59] | Did you miss me? | |
| [05:01] | We only ever have today. | |
| [05:06] | Are you helping your mother with the luggage? | |
| [05:08] | – She’s got it. – She’s fine. | |
| [05:09] | Cool, cool, cool. I’ll just, uh… | |
| [05:11] | Did you ask her? | |
| [05:12] | – Nan, she’s fine. – Oh, please. | |
| [05:14] | – It’s not even that heavy. – All right. | |
| [05:16] | – All right. – I got everything. | |
| [05:20] | Ow. | |
| [05:29] | Mom. | |
| [05:30] | Has it been raining like this the whole time? | |
| [05:31] | Yes. | |
| [05:33] | – That’s so cozy. – No fair. | |
| [05:34] | I wish it would rain like this all year. | |
| [05:36] | – Same. – Why is the window open? | |
| [05:38] | Close your window, for God’s sake. | |
| [05:40] | Okay. | |
| [05:41] | How’s my dogs? And Dr. Bedloe? | |
| [05:43] | They’re good, bunny. | |
| [05:44] | They missed you, but I missed you the mostest. | |
| [05:48] | Aw. | |
| [05:49] | Mom, I want to create a dating profile for you. | |
| [05:51] | – A what? – Can you turn down the music, | |
| [05:53] | please? I can’t hear myself think. | |
| [05:55] | Okay. Jesus. | |
| [05:57] | – Anything else, milord? – Mom. | |
| [05:59] | Mom. Mom! | |
| [06:01] | – Oh! Turn this up. – What? | |
| [06:02] | No projectiles. | |
| [06:04] | – Mom, I want to make a dating profile – Turn it up. | |
| [06:05] | for you on, like, Bumble or Raya or some shit. | |
| [06:07] | No, thank you. I’m all set. | |
| [06:10] | I am a volcel. | |
| [06:12] | I’m a voluntary celibate. | |
| [06:14] | It’s true, Mom. You need someone. | |
| [06:16] | Why? I’m fine. I’m seriously fine. | |
| [06:19] | I have my friends and you guys and Uncle Rich, | |
| [06:22] | our dogs and Dr. Bedloe, and-and my work. | |
| [06:30] | ♪ We don’t need, we don’t need… ♪ | |
| [06:34] | So… | |
| [06:36] | did you guys have a good time while you were there? | |
| [06:41] | I don’t know. Kind of. | |
| [06:44] | You can have had a good time. | |
| [06:46] | It’s okay by me. | |
| [06:53] | Mom. | |
| [06:54] | Really sorry to say this, | |
| [06:56] | but my-my dad wanted to know | |
| [06:57] | if you were gonna send him something? | |
| [07:00] | Oh. What? | |
| [07:02] | Um, he told me to ask you. | |
| [07:05] | Sorry, what-what is that? | |
| [07:07] | Is he asking for money? | |
| [07:09] | You really shouldn’t be driving in this weather. | |
| [07:11] | We could get trapped in a mudslide. | |
| [07:13] | Mom, I don’t think you should send him any money anymore. | |
| [07:15] | I mean, his family owns, like, a ton of businesses. | |
| [07:18] | Okay, well, what do you think? | |
| [07:19] | I want to give him money? | |
| [07:21] | I don’t want him coming for me. | |
| [07:25] | Bless you. | |
| [07:26] | One for a wish, two for a kiss, three’s for a letter… | |
| [07:30] | – If anyone sneezes. | – If anyone sneezes. |
| [07:32] | Ow. | |
| [07:36] | Don’t pick at it. Don’t pick at it. | |
| [07:39] | Gran, how long do you have to wear the Cardiac Buddy for? | |
| [07:41] | Ugh. Well, it’s a temporary situation, | |
| [07:43] | but I’m almost finished. | |
| [07:45] | I just need the okay from my cardiologist. | |
| [07:47] | Excuse me all over the place, | |
| [07:49] | but I really can’t bear it anymore. | |
| [07:51] | – Mm. – I don’t remember why I have | |
| [07:52] | to have it. I’m in perfect health. | |
| [07:54] | Nan? | |
| [07:55] | – Nan! – Oh. I feel very tired. | |
| [07:58] | Mom? | |
| [07:59] | Mom, is something | |
| [08:00] | going on with Nan? Is she having a heart attack | |
| [08:03] | or something? | |
| [08:06] | Mom? | |
| [08:08] | Mom. | |
| [08:17] | You’ll need to wear a personal defibrillator | |
| [08:19] | for a few months while we monitor your situation. | |
| [08:24] | – Whoa! – Whoa. | |
| [08:25] | Bollocking shit-licker! | |
| [08:27] | Phil. Don’t do that. Christ’s sakes. | |
| [08:31] | – Oh, God. – Fuck you! | |
| [08:34] | Mom! | |
| [08:35] | What are you doing right now? | |
| [08:37] | Well, it’s incredibly rude and dangerous. | |
| [08:41] | It’s not for you. It’s for the driver | |
| [08:44] | to have road rage if she so chooses. | |
| [08:47] | – Jesus! – Oh, my God. | |
| [08:49] | Behave! Close your window. | |
| [08:51] | God. | |
| [08:52] | Guys, don’t encourage her. | |
| [08:54] | – Follow that driver! – God! | |
| [08:56] | MOONX357. | |
| [08:58] | – That’s the number plate. – Shh! | |
| [09:00] | Hey, hey, hey. | |
| [09:01] | – Nan! – I mean… Mom! | |
| [09:03] | Shh. That’s it. | |
| [09:09] | Okay. | |
| [09:11] | Get out. | |
| [09:12] | Don’t be ridiculous. | |
| [09:14] | – Mom! | – Mom! |
| [09:16] | Get… out. | |
| [09:18] | I have a serious heart condition. | |
| [09:20] | I could pop off at any moment. | |
| [09:22] | Which you’d be very glad about | |
| [09:23] | when I’m not in your hair anymore. | |
| [09:25] | Bro, that’s what the defibrillator is for. | |
| [09:27] | – It’ll shock you and call the hospital. – Mom! | |
| [09:30] | It even has a GPS in case she gets lost. | |
| [09:33] | You’re not allowed in the car anymore. | |
| [09:35] | Goodbye now. | |
| [09:36] | If you can’t behave, you can’t stay. | |
| [09:44] | Go on! Get going. | |
| [09:46] | You can leave me here like the squirrels | |
| [09:48] | and the skunks and the roadkills. | |
| [09:50] | Okay. Bye. | |
| [09:52] | – Nan, come back! – Nan! | |
| [09:54] | – Phil! – Nan, oh, my God. | |
| [09:55] | – Nan, come on! – Mom! | |
| [09:57] | – Come back. – Nan! Come back! | |
| [09:58] | – Nan! M… – Stop. Don’t. | |
| [10:00] | Turn around. | |
| [10:01] | – Mom! You can’t just do that! – Mom, you can’t do that! | |
| [10:05] | Okay. Phil, that’s enough. | |
| [10:07] | Come back. | |
| [10:09] | – Wow. Okay. – Mom, stop. | |
| [10:10] | Mom, you can’t just do that. | |
| [10:12] | – Yes, I can. – No, you can’t. Go back. | |
| [10:14] | – Yes, I can. – Go back. | |
| [10:15] | – Mom! – Uh-uh. Uh-uh. | |
| [10:17] | Let me enjoy this. I have had custody | |
| [10:19] | of your grandmother the whole time you’ve been away. | |
| [10:22] | Mom, this isn’t funny anymore, and it’s raining! | |
| [10:24] | She could get electrocuted. Shock, shock, shock, shock. | |
| [10:27] | Okay, okay. | |
| [10:29] | I’m going back. | |
| [10:31] | Getting the old hawk. | |
| [10:39] | So, did you guys have fun at your dad’s? | |
| [10:44] | – Mm. – It was fine. | |
| [10:46] | All G. | |
| [10:49] | Cool. Cool, cool, cool. | |
| [10:53] | Can we get Fruit by the Foot? | |
| [10:54] | They didn’t let us have any fun food. | |
| [10:56] | Fruit by the Foot? | |
| [10:58] | You know it. | |
| [11:04] | Nan! Nan, Nan, you have to come back. | |
| [11:08] | – What? Why? – Come on, Nan. | |
| [11:10] | – She doesn’t mean it. – No, she doesn’t. | |
| [11:11] | – She does mean it. – No, she doesn’t. | |
| [11:12] | She does. | |
| [11:14] | Thank you, Frankie. | |
| [11:16] | Thank you. You see? | |
| [11:17] | Your girls look after me. | |
| [11:20] | I was gonna walk home, actually. | |
| [11:22] | Yeah. | |
| [11:23] | – You wouldn’t have got me. – Mm-hmm. | |
| [11:25] | They did. | |
| [11:42] | Thank you, guys. | |
| [11:54] | _ | |
| [11:58] | _ | |
| [12:05] | _ | |
| [12:15] | _ | |
| [12:24] | _ | |
| [12:34] | Sprang Break! | |
| [12:36] | Sprang Break! | |
| [13:03] | ♪ Put the nipple to the bottle, never satisfied ♪ | |
| [13:08] | ♪ Put the nipple to the bottle… ♪ | |
| [13:12] | ♪ Now the cow must die ♪ | |
| [13:14] | ♪ Hey! How you gonna get it? ♪ | |
| [13:18] | ♪ If I ain’t gonna give it? ♪ | |
| [13:21] | ♪ How you gonna get it? Ooh! ♪ | |
| [13:23] | ♪ If I ain’t gonna give it? ♪ | |
| [13:25] | ♪ Mm. ♪ Morning. | |
| [13:27] | Coffee? Mm. | |
| [13:29] | I worked until 2:30. | |
| [13:31] | Can you please just…? | |
| [13:34] | Mom, I love you. | |
| [13:35] | Can you… just go? Please. | |
| [13:43] | There’s all kinds of things that… | |
| [13:48] | … people can participate in during the day, | |
| [13:50] | even if they have jobs at night, | |
| [13:52] | and they-they wake up, and they go out, | |
| [13:56] | let the sun hit their skin. | |
| [13:58] | You know, even if they work in restaurants. | |
| [14:02] | And there’s all kinds of things they can participate in. | |
| [14:06] | You know, work at night | |
| [14:08] | and actually see the light of day, maybe. | |
| [14:12] | I don’t know. It’s a crazy thought. | |
| [14:58] | Mom? | |
| [15:00] | Mom! Mom. | |
| [15:02] | – Hmm. – Chef? | |
| [15:03] | – Sam? Samwell Tarly? – Yes. Mm. | |
| [15:06] | Your Grace. Breakfast is ready. | |
| [15:09] | Mom. | |
| [15:10] | – Yes. Mm. – Okay. | |
| [15:12] | – So… – Hmm. Yes? What? | |
| [15:15] | I kind of want… a… | |
| [15:20] | I kind of want… | |
| [15:22] | I want a big party this year for my birthday. | |
| [15:25] | What?! Serious?! | |
| [15:28] | Yeah. I really do. | |
| [15:29] | I-I mean, I… I want a big party. | |
| [15:31] | I’ve never had one before. | |
| [15:33] | Who you telling? I’ve been wanting | |
| [15:35] | to do something like this for you forever. | |
| [15:37] | – Okay, well, I want a party. – Okay. | |
| [15:40] | Okay! This is the best thing ever! | |
| [15:43] | What do you want? | |
| [15:44] | You want a party bus with a stripper pole? | |
| [15:46] | You want Moonlight Rollerway? | |
| [15:48] | You want a girls party? | |
| [15:50] | You’re gonna be 15. | |
| [15:52] | You’re gonna be 15. | |
| [15:54] | Oh, Jesus. | |
| [15:56] | Oh, God, I hope you take it easier on me at 15 than Max did. | |
| [16:01] | That was intunse. | |
| [16:03] | I know what I want. | |
| [16:05] | I want a quinceañera. | |
| [16:07] | You want a quinceañera? | |
| [16:10] | You can’t. | |
| [16:11] | We can’t do that. | |
| [16:13] | We’re too white for that. We’re not allowed. | |
| [16:15] | It’s against the law. | |
| [16:16] | It’s not cultural appropriation, Mom. | |
| [16:19] | It’s-it’s appreciation. | |
| [16:20] | I mean, I-I want to honor the roots of the land | |
| [16:23] | that I literally live on, | |
| [16:24] | which was, for all intents and purposes… | |
| [16:26] | Let’s face it… Mexican land. | |
| [16:29] | I mean, c-come on. Uh, Los Feliz, uh, Sepulveda, | |
| [16:32] | Pico, Santa Monica. | |
| [16:34] | Are you kidding me? I-I want to acknowledge | |
| [16:36] | that California is a Latinx commonwealth of people | |
| [16:38] | who have been marginalized. | |
| [16:42] | You’re so culturally… whatever. | |
| [16:45] | No, I’m not. | |
| [16:48] | Well, geez, you never even had a Bat Mitzvah. | |
| [16:51] | I know. That’s the point, and now I’m too old for one. | |
| [16:54] | And you’re too Jewish for a quinceañera. | |
| [16:57] | And you’re not too old for a Bat Mitzvah. | |
| [16:59] | You can get Bat Mitzvahed at any age. | |
| [17:02] | Remember, we went to Auntie Pascal’s Bat Mitzvah. | |
| [17:04] | Yeah, but Mom, I-I want to be the age of the thing | |
| [17:06] | that we’re supposed to be celebrating | |
| [17:08] | traditionally at the time. | |
| [17:09] | Huh. | |
| [17:11] | Well… | |
| [17:12] | And I want my dad to come. | |
| [17:16] | I mean… | |
| [17:17] | you to invite him. | |
| [17:19] | I want… whether he shows up or not, I-I don’t care. | |
| [17:22] | I just, I want… | |
| [17:24] | you to invite him. | |
| [17:27] | Okay. Okay. Okay. | |
| [17:30] | Okay. Okay, okay. | |
| [17:33] | Listen, I-I-I-I am happy | |
| [17:37] | to have a party for you. That would be my pleasure | |
| [17:39] | – to do that for you. – You have to… | |
| [17:41] | invite my dad, Mom. | |
| [17:43] | Oh. | |
| [17:47] | You have to. It’s part of it. | |
| [17:51] | Oh. | |
| [17:53] | “Oh, my God, shoes.” | |
| [17:57] | Sorry, not sorry. | |
| [18:00] | Will you? | |
| [18:02] | Mm-hmm. Yes. | |
| [18:04] | Uh-huh. Yup. | |
| [18:05] | Yes, I am. I will do that. | |
| [18:11] | I love you. | |
| [18:18] | I love you. | |
| [18:33] | All right. And… | |
| [18:36] | “Oh, my God, shoes.” | |
| [18:38] | ♪ Oh, my God, shoes ♪ | |
| [18:40] | – ♪ Shoes ♪ – “These shoes rule.” | |
| [18:42] | ♪ These shoes rule ♪ | |
| [18:43] | – “These shoes suck.” – ♪ These shoes suck ♪ | |
| [18:46] | – ♪ These shoes suck! ♪ – “These shoes suck.” | |
| [18:48] | ♪ Shoes ♪ | |
| [18:49] | – _ – Oh. | |
| [18:52] | ♪ Shoes ♪ | |
| [18:54] | – ♪ These shoes suck ♪ – “These shoes suck.” | |
| [18:56] | ♪ These shoes suck, shoes ♪ | |
| [18:59] | – “Oh, my God, shoes.” – ♪ Oh, my God, shoes. ♪ | |
| [19:05] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:07] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:11] | ♪ Splash in the coffee ♪ | |
| [19:13] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:15] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:19] | ♪ Splash in the coffee ♪ | |
| [19:22] | – ♪ Matzo balls ♪ – ♪ Matzo balls-a-reeney ♪ | |
| [19:24] | – ♪ Gefilte fish ♪ – ♪ A-gefilte fish-o-vootie ♪ | |
| [19:26] | – ♪ Pickled herring ♪ – ♪ A-pickled herring-vootie ♪ | |
| [19:28] | – ♪ Lox-a-rooney ♪ – ♪ Oh, lox-a-rooney ♪ | |
| [19:30] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:32] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [19:36] | ♪ Splash in the coffee ♪ | |
| [20:19] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [20:23] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, splash ♪ | |
| [20:25] | ♪ In the coffee ♪ | |
| [20:27] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [20:29] | ♪ Dunkin’ bagel, dunkin’ bagel ♪ | |
| [20:33] | ♪ Splash in the coffee ♪ | |
| [20:35] | ♪ How about a bowl of gefilte fish? ♪ | |
| [20:40] | He’s young, honey. | |
| [20:43] | That’s what young people do, they move on. | |
| [20:48] | You need some more brown? | |
| [20:51] | Uh, I don’t think I should. | |
| [20:54] | I don’t think I should. | |
| [20:57] | I think the brown is getting me more down. | |
| [21:03] | I knew I was in for pain. | |
| [21:06] | Yeah. | |
| [21:08] | Well, at least he had the balls to be honest with you. | |
| [21:16] | Finally, I had to say the words. | |
| [21:22] | “You seem different. What’s going on?” | |
| [21:25] | And when he said… | |
| [21:29] | “I feel like I’m not as into it as you are,” | |
| [21:34] | I argued with him. | |
| [21:39] | I tried to talk him into… | |
| [21:42] | loving me. | |
| [21:45] | I tried to talk him into it. | |
| [21:49] | Tried to talk him into loving me the way I love him, and… | |
| [21:56] | It’s insane. | |
| [21:59] | Stupid. | |
| [22:02] | But I didn’t care. | |
| [22:08] | Super attractive. | |
| [22:09] | Yeah, really cute. | |
| [22:10] | Cute-cute, right? | |
| [22:12] | It’s like a pheromone. | |
| [22:14] | Desperacy. | |
| [22:17] | Such a good look on me. | |
| [22:20] | – Oh. – Shh. | |
| [22:21] | Hi. | |
| [22:23] | – Sorry. – No, no. | |
| [22:32] | You okay, Guncle Rico? | |
| [22:37] | This is… this is so embarrassing. | |
| [22:39] | I’m a mess. | |
| [22:43] | Come here. | |
| [22:50] | Thank you. | |
| [22:57] | Do you know, | |
| [22:59] | you’re gonna get through this. | |
| [23:01] | Time is your friend. | |
| [23:03] | And we’re all here for you. | |
| [23:05] | And you’ll find love again. | |
| [23:07] | And if you put the work in now, | |
| [23:09] | you’ll be better in the long run. | |
| [23:12] | And, later, | |
| [23:13] | when you meet someone, | |
| [23:15] | they’ll be better for you. | |
| [23:17] | Because you’ll be better then, too. | |
| [23:21] | Okay. | |
| [23:27] | Good night, sleep tight, don’t let the bedbugs bite. | |
| [23:30] | See you in the morning light. | |
| [23:31] | Not if I see you first. | |
| [23:34] | I love you both. | |
| [23:43] | Uh… | |
| [23:47] | I can’t believe she even exists. | |
| [23:49] | Same. | |
| [23:55] | – That killed me. – Yeah. | |
| [23:59] | Why don’t you put the Housewives on? | |
| [24:02] | – Yes. – Yeah. | |
| [24:03] | – Housewives. – Yeah. | |
| [24:13] | Good? | |
| [24:14] | Yes. | |
| [24:15] | Hon. | |
| [24:17] | Hey, hey, hey, baby! | |
| [24:22] | Oh, my God! It’s so good to see you! | |
| [24:29] | I love you so much. | |
| [24:32] | I love you more. | |
| [24:38] | Well, I hope you’re ready, ’cause… | |
| [24:41] | tonight’s the night I’m finally gonna stick it in. | |
| [24:46] | Fuck yeah. | |
| [24:51] | My evil plan worked. | |
| [24:54] | You turned me. | |
| [24:56] | I turned you. Yes. | |
| [25:00] | Oh, this is a good one. | |
| [25:02] | – You’ve seen this? – Mm-hmm. | |
| [25:05] | Duker! | |
| [25:07] | – Get chocolate! – Oh, that’s… | |
| [25:09] | From the secret drawer! | |
| [25:11] | Oh, that’s a great idea. | |
| [25:13] | – Mm. – Oh. |