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美式主妇(American Housewife)第5季第1集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 美式主妇(American Housewife)第5季第1集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
时间 英文 中文
[00:03] Anna-kat, are you done with your breakfast? 安娜凯特 你吃完早餐了吗
[00:07] Anna-kat! 安娜凯特
[00:08] Did you know the wildflower girls camp 你知道吗 野花女孩露营
[00:09] has a ropes course, canoeing, and horseback riding? 包含绳索课程 皮艇和骑马项目
[00:13] Yeah — kids change. 没错 孩子会变的
[00:15] The packing list says that fifth graders and above 打包清单写着五年级及以上学生
[00:17] need to bring feminine hygiene products, 需要带上女性卫生用品
[00:19] which means this could be my year! 也就是说今年可能是我的主场
[00:26] Can you believe it? 你能相信吗
[00:27] Anna-Kat is going to sleepaway camp! 安娜凯特居然要去野外宿营
[00:29] We have taken her from being a weirdo 在我们的引导下 她从怪咖成长为
[00:31] to a strong, confident girl. 自信坚强的女孩
[00:32] She just gave her dad a high-five about menstruating. 她刚为了月经跟她爸击掌
[00:35] She still has a little weirdo left in her. 她还是有点怪
[00:38] Kate. Donks. 凯特 大屁股
[00:40] Read the latest draft of the book. Love it. 我读了自传的最新草稿 大爱
[00:43] The ending still needs a little work, 结局有待修改
[00:44] so meet me at our office. 所以来我们办公室找我
[00:46] Uh, we might be working late, 我们可能会讨论到很晚
[00:47] so I brought you some of those canned protein drinks for old women. 所以我给你带了几罐老女人喝的蛋白饮料
[00:52] This is the fifth conclusion he’s shot down. 这是他毙掉的第五个结局了
[00:54] I keep trying to be poignant, 我一直想表现出深刻
[00:55] but I guess I’ll just give him what he wants — a happy ending. 但我还是满足他吧 给他一个美满结局
[00:59] Thanks for not saying anything. 谢谢你善意的沉默
[01:01] Mom! 老妈
[01:03] The list for graduation came out, and I’m not on it! 毕业名单出来了 但我不在上面
[01:05] It’s only two days away! What was it? 再过两天就毕业了 怎么回事
[01:07] You didn’t turn a paper in? 你没交论文吗
[01:08] You forgot to fill out some forms? 你忘记填什么表了吗
[01:09] No, my freshman year, I gave you a library book to return, 不 我大一那年叫你帮我还一本书给图书馆
[01:12] and you never did. 结果你没还
[01:14] That sounds about right. 好像有这回事
[01:15] I’m not going to graduate because of you! 你要害我毕不了业了
[01:17] Okay, calm down. I’m your mother. 好了 冷静点 我是你老妈
[01:18] I’ll take care of it. 我会搞定的
[01:20] Okay. Thank you. 好的 谢谢你
[01:21] And, Taylor, a little gratitude would be nice. 泰勒 表示下感激又不会死
[01:24] I literally just said “thank you.” 我刚刚跟你说了”谢谢”
[01:26] To be fair, I wasn’t listening. 说句公道话 我没在听你说话
[01:35] I like all your endings, 你写的每个结局我都喜欢
[01:37] but they’re not making me want to hit “subscribe.” 但你没能打动我到让我想按”订阅”
[01:39] I don’t know what else to say about your life. 我不知道你的人生还有什么可写
[01:40] You’re only 25 years old. 你只有25岁
[01:42] You shoot your friends with paintball guns, 你成天用彩弹枪射你的朋友
[01:44] then buy them fast-food franchises. 然后请他们吃快餐赔罪
[01:47] I do do that. 我的确会这样做
[01:49] I still think we need a great ending, 我还是认为我们需要一个伟大的结局
[01:51] and you and I are not gonna rest until we come up with one. 想不出来就不能休息
[01:59] That’s smart. 明智之举
[02:00] I need my lady sharp tonight. 我需要我的女人今晚如狼似虎
[02:06] Next year’s gonna be amazing. We’ll be juniors. 明年会非常精彩 到时我们就高三了
[02:08] We can drive ourselves to school. 可以自己开车上学
[02:10] We’ll be in that hot Spanish teacher’s class. 可以上那位火辣西语女老师的课
[02:12] Senora Campos! 坎普斯老师
[02:15] So, me and Kelly, we didn’t know 我和凯莉本来不知道
[02:16] if we were gonna stay together 我们会不会分开
[02:17] while she’s at Penn and I’m at Tufts. 到时她会去宾大上学 我会去塔夫茨大学
[02:19] But then we took that online quiz 但之后我们做了个在线测试
[02:20] “Are you and your high school sweetheart built to last?” “你和你的高中恋人能否长久”
[02:23] And it looks like we totally are. 看结果我们绝对能走下去
[02:24] Well, Trip and I don’t have to worry about that. 我和特里普就不用担心这一点
[02:26] Yeah, she’s staying in town taking a gap year, 没错 她会留在镇上度过间隔年
[02:28] and I’m going to college. 我会去上大学
[02:29] I’m just not sure where to apply yet. 我就是还不确定要申请哪所学校
[02:30] You had to apply months ago. 几个月前就得申请了
[02:34] I guess I’m taking a gap year, too. 那看来我也要间隔一年了
[02:36] We should take the quiz anyway. 我们还是应该做做那个测试
[02:38] Just for fun. 就当作好玩
[02:39] Well, yeah, even if it’s just for fun, 就算只是闹着玩
[02:40] I’m supposed to get extra time to take it. 我做测试也应该得到额外的学时
[02:42] It’s in my chart. 我的表里写了
[02:46] What do you mean, you don’t want me to go to camp?! 你说不希望我去露营是什么意思
[02:48] It looks so fun! 看起来超好玩的啊
[02:49] There’s no more dangerous place in the world than summer camp. 这世上没有比夏令营更危险的地方了
[02:52] Except maybe Olive Garden. 除了橄榄花园意大利餐厅
[02:54] Those unlimited breadsticks are dangerous to my waistline. 那些无限供应的面包棒对我的腰围极度有害
[02:57] How could it be dangerous? 怎么会危险呢
[02:58] It’s just super fun activities. 都是些超好玩的活动
[03:00] They have dodgeball. 他们有躲避球
[03:01] More like death-ball. 是死亡球才对
[03:02] Water skiing. 滑水
[03:03] Water-dying. 滑尸吧
[03:04] Arts and crafts. 手工艺
[03:05] Arts and dying. I can do this all day. 手工作死 我能跟你扯一整天
[03:09] I was so excited, but I hadn’t really considered all the — 我本来很兴奋的 但我没仔细考虑过这些…
[03:12] All the dying? I know. no one does. 花式死法吗 我懂 没人会考虑
[03:15] I’m sorry, but I’m gonna have to say no to this idea. 抱歉 我不得不反对你这个想法
[03:17] I’m glad I talked to you before I went. 我很庆幸我去之前先找你谈过
[03:19] I probably saved your life today. 我今天很可能救了你一命
[03:24] Slow down, punks. 慢点 小子
[03:26] Katie! Just the person I wanted to see. 凯蒂 我正想找你
[03:29] Ablin, for the thousandth time, 阿布林 我说过无数次了
[03:31] I don’t plan parties any more. 我现在不策划派对了
[03:32] So I’m not going to do your strange wedding. 所以我不会替你策划你的古怪婚礼
[03:34] It’s not strange to wear a kilt. 穿苏格兰裙有什么古怪的
[03:35] You’re not Scottish. 你又不是苏格兰人
[03:36] I get sweaty when I get nervous, 我一紧张就出汗
[03:38] and it’s the only socially acceptable way 这是唯一一个为社会所接受的
[03:40] for me to ventilate my nethers. 给我下面通风的方式
[03:48] Excuse me. 打扰一下
[03:52] Tara. What are you doing here? 泰拉 你怎么会在这儿
[03:54] I volunteer two afternoons a week. 我每周有两个下午在这里当志愿者
[03:56] Because I care about giving back to the community. 因为我在乎回馈我的社区
[03:59] What do you want, Katie? 你有何贵干 凯蒂
[04:00] I have to pay Taylor’s library fine 我得替泰勒付图书馆罚金
[04:02] so that she could graduate. 好让她能顺利毕业
[04:08] The book is four years late. 这本书逾期四年
[04:10] Paying a fine isn’t even an option anymore. 已经没有付罚金这个选项了
[04:12] Just says “see administrator.” 上面就写着”找管理员”
[04:13] Tara, can you just help me out? 泰拉 拜托你帮帮忙
[04:15] I promise I’ll stop bringing the class 我保证不再给班上的人
[04:16] Vegan cupcakes that are not even remotely vegan. 带根本不素的素食蛋糕
[04:19] You what? 你说什么
[04:20] You can’t bake without eggs. everyone knows that. 没有鸡蛋烤个屁蛋糕 是人都知道
[04:22] Even you stupid vegans. 包括你们这些蠢素食者
[04:25] Even if I wanted to help you — which I don’t — 就算我想帮你 当然了 我并不想
[04:28] I can’t. 我也帮不了
[04:29] It’s a computer thing, 这需要电脑操作
[04:30] and I don’t have the code to override the system. 我没有覆盖系统的密码
[04:32] Who does? 那谁有
[04:34] So, you want your daughter to graduate, 所以你希望你女儿能毕业
[04:36] but she can’t unless I punch in 但她毕不了业 除非我输入
[04:38] my administrative override code. 我的管理员覆盖密码
[04:39] What to do? what to do? 我该怎么做才好呢
[04:42] Fine! 我投降
[04:43] I’ll plan your wedding. 我会替你策划婚礼
[04:45] Great. 好极了
[04:45] So, during summer break, 暑假期间
[04:47] Maria and I wish to take a riverboat trip together. 我和玛丽亚想一起坐江轮游览
[04:49] But mother will not let us travel in sin. 但母亲不会允许我们未婚同居
[04:51] You’re a grown man. 你是成年男子了
[04:53] One might say an old man. 可以说是个老男人了
[04:55] Why do you still listen to your mother? 你为什么还那么听你妈的话
[04:56] Because I don’t want to get grounded. 因为人家不想被禁足啊
[04:58] In any event, we must be wed in the next two days. 不管怎样 我们必须在未来两天内完婚
[05:00] The riverboat leaves out of chicago 毕业典礼结束后
[05:02] shortly after graduation. 江轮就马上驶离芝加哥
[05:03] It’s not gonna be easy to throw together a wedding the last second. 临时准备好一场婚礼并非易事
[05:06] What’s your budget? 你有多少预算
[05:06] $195. 195块
[05:08] We spent all our money on the riverboat cruise, 我们把钱都拿去买江轮游船票了
[05:10] But it’s top-of-the-line. 但那是业内顶尖的船
[05:11] We’re only sharing our room with four other couples. 我们只和四对夫妇共享房间
[05:14] I guess I could pull together a small — 我应该能办好一场小…
[05:16] No. Maria’s always dreamed of a big wedding. 不 玛丽亚一直梦想有一场盛大的婚礼
[05:19] Can you get the guest list together in time? 你能及时整理好宾客名单吗
[05:20] Oh, that’ll be easy. 那太简单了
[05:22] Neither of us have much family, 我们俩都没什么家人
[05:23] and our friend will be out of town that day. 而且我们的朋友那天都不在城里
[05:25] Then how is it going to be big? 那怎么让婚礼盛大起来
[05:26] That’s up to you to figure out, 那就靠你来解决了
[05:27] if you want your daughter to graduate. 如果你想让你女儿毕业
[05:30] Anything else? 还有别的要求吗
[05:32] Yes. 有
[05:33] Maria wants to walk down the aisle to bagpipes, 玛丽亚希望在走红毯时要有风笛乐队演奏
[05:35] And she wants the whole thing professionally videoed. 她还希望有专业摄影师录下整个过程
[05:37] You want all that for $195? 预算195块还有这么多要求吗
[05:40] Actually… 实际上
[05:42] $191.55. 只有191.55块
[05:43] I got a starbucks this morning. 我今早喝了杯星巴克
[05:52] Basically, i’m being blackmailed. 基本上来说 我被敲诈了
[05:54] In order for Taylor to graduate, 为了让泰勒能顺利毕业
[05:55] I have to plan Ablin’s wedding. 我不得不策划阿布林的婚礼
[05:58] That’s so unfair. 这太不公平了
[05:59] Actually, it’s kind of my fault. 实际上 这是我的错
[06:01] Yeah, I had a feeling. 好吧 我早有预感
[06:02] Where am I going to find 200 warm bodies to sit quietly 我上哪儿去找200个大活人安静地坐着
[06:04] and watch a couple of strangers get married? 观看一对陌生人的婚礼啊
[06:06] Would you say there’d be 200 of those warm bodies at graduation? 你觉得毕业仪式上有200个大活人吗
[06:11] Are you saying that Ablin and Maria 你是说阿布林和玛丽亚
[06:13] should get married in the middle of graduation? 应该在毕业仪式过程中结婚吗
[06:15] You’ve got the crowd, you’ve got the venue. 嘉宾有了 场地有了
[06:17] And there are already drinks and desserts afterward, 而且典礼结束后还有饮料和甜点供应
[06:19] So you don’t have to pay for a reception. 所以你都不需要花钱准备婚礼招待
[06:20] Oh, my god! this could actually work! 天呐 这还真有可能成功呢
[06:23] I suppose I have to ask for permission. 大概我需要申请到许可才行
[06:24] Who is in charge of the graduation committee? 毕业委员会的负责人是谁
[06:26] Tara Summers. 泰拉·萨莫斯
[06:28] If I didn’t know better, 如果我不是够聪明
[06:29] I’d think all my feuds make my life more difficult. 我还以为是我的各种仇敌让我的生活更艰难呢
[06:38] I’m done with the quiz. 我完成测试了
[06:39] I just finished my last question. 我刚答完最后一个问题
[06:41] Here we go. 查看结果啦
[06:43] We did it! 我们成功了
[06:43] What are you talking about? 你在胡说什么啊
[06:44] It says we’re – a “dumpster fire of a couple.” 上面说我们这对情侣就像是”垃圾桶里烧起的火”
[06:46] Yeah. dumpster fires are good. 是啊 垃圾桶里烧的火很棒啊
[06:48] They make the lighting in the alley all cool 那会让小巷里的光线
[06:50] for when the turtles come out of the sewer 在忍者神龟从下水道里跳出来
[06:51] and beat up bad guys and eat pizza and stuff. 打败坏人 吃披萨的时候显得很酷
[06:53] No, dumpster fires are not good, Trip. 不 垃圾桶里的火才不好 特里普
[06:55] This quiz says – we’re never gonna make it! 这测试说 我们永远不可能修成正果的
[06:57] Babe, are you serious right now? 宝贝 你是认真的吗
[06:59] It’s just an online quiz. 就是个线上测试而已
[07:00] But Bailey and Garrett took it, 但贝莉和加里特做了这个测试
[07:02] and they broke because of it. 然后因为这测试分手了
[07:03] And they were perfect together. 他们明明是那么配的一对
[07:04] Bailey and Garrett don’t have what we have. 贝莉和加里特可没有我们这种深厚的感情
[07:07] I guess. 大概是吧
[07:08] Also, Bailey and Garrett didn’t break up because the quiz. 再说贝莉和加里特分手也不是因为这个测试
[07:11] They broke up because they found out they’re first cousins. 他们分手是因为他们发现他们是表兄妹
[07:18] Wow, you look terrible. 天呐 你的脸色太糟了
[07:20] What happened? 发生什么事了
[07:21] Did one of your footmen apply for parental leave? 是你的仆人之一要求请产假吗
[07:22] Gustav did, and he’s been spoken to. 古斯塔夫请了 但我已经找他谈过话了
[07:25] But no, this is more serious than that. 但不是为这事 我要说的事比这严重得多
[07:28] My parents bought an estate in palm beach. 我父母在棕榈滩买了栋房子
[07:30] Oh, that’s sick, bro! 那真是太酷了 兄弟
[07:31] No, you don’t understand. 不 你不明白
[07:33] They’re selling our westport estate. 他们要把在西港的房子卖掉
[07:35] We’re moving to Florida. 我们要搬去佛罗里达州了
[07:36] Oh, so you’re gonna take the private jet to school everyday. 所以你每天要乘私人飞机来上学了
[07:38] No, because…I’ll be going to school down there. 不 因为 我要去那边上学了
[07:41] Wait. 等等
[07:43] You’re seriously moving? 你真要搬走了吗
[07:45] Florida has no state income tax. 佛罗里达州没有州所得税
[07:47] It was either there or the caymans. 要么搬去那里 要么搬去开曼群岛
[07:49] And my mother’s allergic to conch, 我妈对贝类食物过敏
[07:51] so it’s like, what’s the point? 所以 有什么意义呢
[07:52] Dude, you can’t go. 兄弟 你不能走
[07:54] We’ve got plans. 我们还有好多计划啊
[07:59] Can’t believe this is happening. 真不敢相信会发生这种事
[08:02] Florida. 佛罗里达州
[08:04] I mean, I’m happy for you fiscally, but… 在财务方面我很为你开心 但…
[08:07] I know. 我明白
[08:16] Okay, I need someone who’s already a part of graduation 好了 我需要一个本来就要参加毕业典礼
[08:18] who’s also ordained to marry them. 同时又有资格为他们证婚的人
[08:21] Plus a bagpiper. 再加个风笛手
[08:22] Oh, the things you do for your kid. 为了孩子真是操碎了心啊
[08:24] Isn’t this all your fault? 难道这不都是你自己的错吗
[08:26] Like I would ever verbally acknowledge any part in this. 说得好像我会亲口承认任何事一样
[08:29] Watch a cop show, Greg. 多看点警匪剧吧 格雷格
[08:31] Oh, hey, honey. 你好啊 宝贝
[08:32] So, I’ve decided not to go to camp this summer. 我决定今年夏天不参加夏令营了
[08:34] What are you talking about? 你在胡说什么呢
[08:36] You were so excited to go. 你本来对这事万分激动啊
[08:37] Well, I was, but then I talked to Franklin, 本来是的 但我后来跟富兰克林聊了聊
[08:39] and he said that camp is way too dangerous 他说夏令营太危险了
[08:42] and is not on board with me going. 坚决反对我去
[08:44] First of all, we would never send you to a camp that wasn’t safe. 首先 如果夏令营不安全 我们是不会送你去的
[08:46] And second, Anna-Kat, 其次 安娜凯特
[08:48] I have raised you to be an independent young woman. 我一直努力把你培养成独立的年轻女性
[08:51] If there is something that you want to do, 如果你想做什么事
[08:53] don’t ever let a boy get in your way. 千万别让一个男孩阻止你
[08:55] Are you sure? 你确定吗
[08:56] Franklin made it sound really scary. 富兰克林说得很吓人
[08:58] He thinks everything’s scary. 他觉得什么都吓人
[09:00] The kid’s 11 years old and wears a life alert necklace. 那孩子才11岁 就戴上急救警报项链了
[09:02] You’re right! 你说得对
[09:03] I don’t have to listen to Franklin just because he’s a boy. 我不需要因为富兰克林是男孩就听他的
[09:05] Exactly. you don’t have to listen to anyone just because — 没错 你不需要听任何人的…
[09:07] Quiet, you! 你给我闭嘴
[09:16] Pardon me, young man! 请稍等 年轻人
[09:22] The ultimate prank — the paintball bazooka! 终极恶作剧 彩蛋火箭筒
[09:27] I paid the robotics team at MIT to create it. 我花钱请麻省理工的机器人研究小组发明了这个
[09:29] Totally worth it. 太值了
[09:30] Not worth it, but at least we have an ending to your book. 不值得 但至少你的书现在有了结尾了
[09:33] Congrats, Lonnie. 恭喜你 朗尼
[09:35] I-I don’t know. 我 我不太确定
[09:36] I think we move this up to the beginning 我觉得我们该把这事放在书开头的部分
[09:38] A-and then we try to figure out a way to top ourselves. 然后我们再想办法超越自己
[09:40] You want to top yourself? Do it on your own time. 你想超越自己是吗 随你的便
[09:43] I’m done with you, – and I’m done with this project! 我跟你没有关系了 跟写书的项目也没关系了
[09:47] Donks, don’t be like that. 海臀 别这样嘛
[09:49] Fine! I don’t need you! 好吧 我不需要你
[09:52] I’ll just go find another old dude! 我会再去找个老家伙来帮我写的
[09:53] There’s a Tommy Bahama three blocks from here! 离这里三个街区就有家汤米·巴哈马中老年服装店
[10:00] Done. 完成
[10:01] Okay. I finished, too. 好了 我也完成了
[10:03] Let’s try this again. 我们再试下
[10:05] Fireworks! 是焰火
[10:05] No! 不
[10:06] Nuclear bomb! 是核弹
[10:08] We are never gonna make it! 我们永远不可能修成正果了
[10:12] Maria, this wedding dress belonged to my friend Doris. 玛丽亚 这件婚纱是我朋友多瑞丝的
[10:16] It’s custom-made, from Italy. 是在意大利定制的
[10:17] It’s exquisite! 简直太精美了
[10:20] This has – a fairly substantial burn mark. 这里有一块相当大的火烧痕迹啊
[10:22] Yeah, Doris got a little arson-y after the divorce. 没错 多瑞丝离婚后变得有点爱纵火
[10:25] But it’s free. 不过是免费的啊
[10:26] Maria, you’re crafty. you can fix it. 玛丽亚 你心灵手巧 你能修补好的
[10:28] She hemmed my pajamas into shorties. 她给我的睡衣镶边 最后成了短裤
[10:30] They’re quite short. 相当短哦
[10:33] And who will be performing our sacred vows? 谁来主持婚礼 领着我们说婚誓呢
[10:35] I haven’t nailed that down yet, but don’t worry. 我还没搞定这个 不过别担心
[10:37] I’m working on it. 我在努力了
[10:37] Well, until you do figure it out, 在你想出办法前
[10:39] your little piggy will not be going to market. 你的小猪猪可休想去市场
[10:41] Your little piggy will stay home. 你的小猪猪只能待在家里
[10:43] I call all students little piggies. 我称呼学生们为小猪猪
[10:45] Market is graduation. home is home. 市场是指毕业 家就是家
[10:47] After all this, 这事之后
[10:48] the two of us are going back to a more formal relationship. 我们两个必须回归正常的人际关系
[10:54] Mrs. A, Taylor just told me to go home. A太太 泰勒刚刚叫我回家去
[10:56] That stupid quiz is messing with her head. 那个傻兮兮的测试搞得她神经兮兮的
[10:58] Don’t pay attention to quizzes, Trip. 别把测试放在心上 特里普
[11:00] I literally never have. 我是真的没放在心上
[11:01] But Taylor did, and now she’s really upset with me. 但泰勒放在心上了 现在她很生我的气
[11:03] She won’t even listen to what I have to say. 她都不肯听我的解释和劝导
[11:04] What I suggest you do is to trick her into hearing you. 我建议你骗她听你说
[11:07] Tricking is a major part of any long-term relationship. 欺骗是任何长久关系中必不可少的一部分
[11:10] If only it was that easy to get this wedding sorted out. 如果办婚礼也这么简单就好了
[11:12] I don’t even have someone to marry them. 我都没有婚礼主持人
[11:14] I can do it. 我能做主持人
[11:14] – You have to be ordained. – I’m ordained. -你得得到任命才行 -我被任命了
[11:16] I did it online 是在网上获得的
[11:17] so I could perform a marriage ceremony for Anna-Kat’s toy ponies, 好让我给安妮凯特的玩具小马举行婚礼
[11:20] Twinkle Toes and Duffy Mcsprinkles. 闪光脚趾和达菲·麦克糖霜
[11:22] She wanted it legal. 她想搞的正式点
[11:23] That’s amazing! 太好了
[11:24] Now all I need is someone 现在我只需要一个
[11:25] who knows how to play the bagpipes. 会吹风笛的人了
[11:27] Franklin wasn’t available? 富兰克林没空吗
[11:28] Franklin plays the bagpipes? 富兰克林会吹风笛吗
[11:29] Yeah. 会
[11:30] He joined a bagpiping group as a way to rehab his asthma, 他加入了一个风笛组来治疗哮喘
[11:33] and it turned into a passion. 结果变成了爱好
[11:34] Then it’s all set. 那就都妥了
[11:35] Taylor is gonna graduate! 泰勒可以毕业了
[11:37] You would’ve loved the ceremony, Mrs. A. 你肯定会喜欢那场婚礼的 A太太
[11:39] Duffy Mcsprinkles got cold hooves, 达菲·麦克糖霜临阵退缩了
[11:41] but a last-minute pep talk from Starburst von Clydesdale 但星爆·冯·克莱斯戴尔最后的鼓励
[11:43] sorted them out. 解决了问题
[11:44] It was…beautiful. 非常感人
[11:55] You’re quiet today. 你今天很安静
[11:57] I don’t want to talk about it. 我不想谈
[11:58] Oh, you took that the wrong way. 你误会了
[12:00] I like you quiet. 我喜欢你安静
[12:04] Well, I’m ready for this graduation/wedding thing. 我准备好参加这个毕业结婚典礼了
[12:06] I think I have everything set. 我想我都搞定了
[12:07] The moment that they are married, 他们结婚的那刻
[12:09] Ablin will allow Taylor to graduate. 阿布林会让泰勒毕业
[12:11] So, is Lonnie meeting us there? 朗尼会在那里跟我们碰头吗
[12:13] I’ve asked him to film the ceremony. 我让他拍摄婚礼来着
[12:14] I don’t know. We’re not speaking. 我不知道 我们不说话了
[12:19] Is Franklin meeting us there with his bagpipes? 富兰克林会带着风笛和我们在那边碰头吗
[12:22] No idea. 不知道
[12:22] Ever since I told him I’m still going to summer camp, 自从我告诉他我要参加夏令营后
[12:25] he’s not talking to me. 他就不跟我说话了
[12:29] Okay. 好吧
[12:30] Let’s go! I’m ready to graduate. 走吧 我准备好毕业了
[12:33] We’ll see. 我们看吧
[12:34] What do you mean, “we’ll see”? 什么叫”我们看吧”
[12:35] You did take care of my library fine, right? 你帮我还清了借书费 对吧
[12:39] I can’t believe my baby’s graduating. 真不敢相信我的宝贝要毕业了
[12:41] Stop! 别闹了
[12:44] Works every time. 屡试不爽
[12:51] Hello, Westport Unified Class of 2020! 大家好 西港联合学校2020届的同学
[12:54] Wow, we did it. 我们做到了
[12:55] Come on, let’s hear some applause. 来吧 大家来点掌声
[12:58] Even some of you I didn’t even think 我甚至想不到你们中的某些人
[13:00] had the grades to graduate are here today. 也能得到能在今天毕业的成绩
[13:02] Nah, I’m just kidding. But anyway… 我开玩笑呢 不过话说回来
[13:04] These last few years have been some of the best of my life. 过去几年 是我人生中最棒的几年
[13:07] Lonnie! Thank god you made it. 朗尼 太好了 你来了
[13:09] Where’s your video camera? 你的摄影机呢
[13:10] Yeah, don’t worry. I got my people all over this thing. 别担心 我的人在拍呢
[13:12] It’s nice of you to show up, 你真好心 决定过来
[13:13] but I’m still not talking to you. 不过我还是不跟你说话
[13:16] You want a poignant ending? Here it is. 你不是想要深刻的结局吗 给你一个
[13:18] My whole world is about collecting likes 我的整个世界都是在收集
[13:20] from people I don’t know. 我不认识的人的点赞
[13:21] But the one person that I actually want to like me 但唯一一个我希望他喜欢我的人
[13:23] doesn’t right now. 现在不喜欢我了
[13:26] You know why my book doesn’t have an ending? 你知道为什么我的书没有结局吗
[13:29] It’s because I don’t… want this to end. 因为我不想让这一切结束
[13:33] You and me. 你和我
[13:35] Thanks for being you. 谢谢大家做自己
[13:37] Nah, I’m just kidding. 不 我开玩笑的
[13:38] Well…there’ll probably be a book tour, right? 也许会有新书巡展签售会呢 对吧
[13:41] Book tour. 巡展签售会
[13:43] Yes! 没错
[13:44] I didn’t think of that. 我怎么没想到
[13:45] Ooh, badonks, with a brain as big as his ass! 海臀 脑袋和屁股一样大
[13:50] We’re back! 我们又回归了
[13:52] We look forward to our future 我们期待着能有一个
[13:53] with perfect, “Class-of-2020” vision. 完美 2020届式的未来
[13:57] Thank you. 谢谢大家
[14:09] The smart kids get to talk at these things every year. 每年聪明的学生都有机会在台上演讲
[14:13] What about the not-so-smart kids? 那不那么聪明的学生呢
[14:15] They have something to say, too. 他们也有话要说
[14:16] So, with the lowest grade point average, 现在要请平均绩点最低的同学
[14:19] Your “maledictorian,” Trip Windsor. 最差致辞生 特里普·温莎
[14:24] What?! 什么
[14:28] Dearly beloved, 亲爱的同学们
[14:30] what is graduation if not a celebration of love? 如果毕业典礼不庆祝爱 又怎能称为毕业典礼呢
[14:34] How is it a celebration of love? 这怎么就是爱的庆典了
[14:35] The maledictorian is speaking! 最差致辞生在说话呢
[14:39] …and the teachers who helped guide us 在过去四年 或者五年
[14:40] through these past four — or five — years, 帮助辅导过我们的老师们
[14:44] And most importantly, 最重要的是
[14:46] the love between an administrator and his girlfriend. 一位管理人员和他女友之间的爱情
[14:54] Franklin made it! It’s all coming together! 富兰克林来了 慢慢成型了
[14:56] Greg, Oliver, go! 格雷格 奥利弗 上
[15:20] Will you give me away? 你能把我交给新郎吗
[15:22] Sure. 当然
[15:24] Wouldn’t be the strangest thing that’s happened today. 这也算不上今天最奇怪的事了
[15:54] I’m gonna talk to Ablin about whatever this is 我要找阿布林谈谈现在的情况
[15:56] and shut it down! 然后马上让其停止
[16:10] Love, like Math, it doesn’t always make sense. 爱情 像数学一样 不是一直都讲得通
[16:15] Like English, it doesn’t always make sense. 像英语一样 不是一直都讲得通
[16:20] Like Science, it doesn’t make sense at all. 像科学一样 完全讲不通
[16:23] But the difference is, love doesn’t have to make sense. 但区别在于 爱情不需要讲得通
[16:26] Because it’s not something that you learn. 因为这不是让你学的东西
[16:28] There’s no stupid quiz that you have to pass, 没有愚蠢的测试让你必须通过
[16:32] ’cause love is making up words in scrabble. 因为爱情就像在拼字游戏里编词
[16:35] 经典动画《爱探险的朵拉》中 朵拉的经典台词
[16:35] And yelling “swiper, no swiping” together. 然后一起喊”狐狸你别偷”
[16:38] It’s something that you feel. 是你的感受
[16:41] And I feel it, now and forever. 而我感受到了 从今直到永远
[16:47] Maria. 玛丽亚
[16:49] Do you take Principal Ablin to be your husband? 你愿意让阿布林校长做你的丈夫吗
[16:53] I do. 我愿意
[16:54] Principal Ablin, do you take Maria to be your wife? 阿布林校长 你愿意让玛丽亚做你的妻子吗
[16:58] I do. 我愿意
[16:59] I now pronounce you Principal and Wife. 我现在宣布你们是校长和校长夫人了
[17:03] You may kiss the bride. 你可以亲吻新娘了
[17:05] Wait, wait, wait! 等等 等等
[17:06] Does my daughter graduate? 我女儿能毕业了吗
[17:07] Absolutely. 当然
[17:24] Everyone, afterward, please join us 各位 之后请参加
[17:26] for our wedding reception in the main gymnasium. 我们在体育馆大堂举行的婚宴
[17:29] You mean the PTA’s Annual Graduation Buffet?! 你说的是家长会年度毕业自助餐吗
[17:33] Either way, we’re playing “brick house.” 不管叫什么 我们都要放砖房乐队的歌
[17:49] Alright, now let me get one with just the siblings. 好了 我拍一张只有兄弟姐妹的照片
[17:55] Can you believe our baby graduated? 你能相信我们的宝贝毕业了吗
[17:56] Just two more to get rid of. 只要再打发两个就行了
[17:58] Your sentimentality is touching. 你的多愁善感真令人感动
[18:10] Look at you. 瞧瞧你
[18:12] You’re upset your sister’s graduating. 你姐姐毕业让你难过了
[18:14] No. It’s Cooper. 不 是库珀
[18:16] He’s moving with his family to Florida. 他要和家人搬去弗罗里达州了
[18:21] I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t know. 真抱歉 宝贝 我不知道
[18:23] He’s my best friend. 他是我最好的朋友
[18:25] You know how hard it is 你知道能找到一个
[18:26] to find a best friend who really gets you? 真正懂你的挚友有多难吗
[18:28] I know this is hard for you, but maybe he’s excited. 我知道你肯定很难过 但或许他很开心呢
[18:33] He doesn’t want to go. 他不想去
[18:34] He never even sees his parents. 他几乎不怎么见到父母
[18:37] I don’t get why they’re forcing him to do this. 我不明白他们为什么要强迫他走
[18:41] I’m gonna miss him so much. 我会很想他的
[18:45] What am I gonna do, mom? 我该怎么办 妈妈
[18:59] I know you’re mad at me, 我知道你在生我的气
[19:01] but it was nice of you to show up today. 但谢谢你今天能来
[19:03] Bagpipers always see a job through. 风笛手总会完成任务
[19:05] Unlike harp players, who bolt at the first sign of conflict. 不像竖琴手 一见情势不对拔腿就跑
[19:08] I think it’s nice you’re so worried about me, 我很感激你这么担心我
[19:11] But it’s my decision to go to summer camp, Franklin. 但去夏令营是我的决定 富兰克林
[19:14] Nothing’s gonna happen. 什么也不会发生
[19:15] Oh, yes, it will! 那你就错了
[19:17] You don’t know what happens at summer camp! I do! 你不知道夏令营会发生什么 我知道
[19:19] It’s where girls get their first kiss! 女孩都会在那失去初吻
[19:21] Is that what you’re worried about? 你担心的就是这个吗
[19:23] Me kissing another boy? 我亲吻别的男孩
[19:25] You’re a real dummy, Franklin. 你真蠢 富兰克林
[19:34] There. Problem solved. 好了 问题解决了
[19:36] I don’t have any guy friends, so I have to brag to you. 我没什么好哥们 所以我只能向你炫耀
[19:39] I just got kissed by a really cute girl. 我刚被一个超可爱的女孩亲了
[19:45] My last home-cooked dinner with the Ottos, 我和奥图家的最后一顿家常便饭
[19:47] where we use paper towels as napkins 我们用纸巾当餐巾
[19:49] and my food isn’t plated properly. 我的食物没有精美摆盘
[19:52] I’m gonna miss this. 我会想念这些的
[19:54] Cooper, there’s something I’ve got to tell you. 库珀 我有事要告诉你
[19:56] No, let me go first. 不 让我先说
[19:58] I didn’t know what it meant 遇到你们之前
[19:59] to be a part of a family until I met you guys. 我根本不知道成为家庭的一部分是什么意思
[20:02] You’re warm and messy and loud, 你们温暖 乱七八糟 吵闹
[20:05] and you drink tap water, 还喝自来水
[20:06] which is just like drinking out of the toilet. 那根本就相当于喝马桶里的水
[20:09] Move on to your next point. 说下个要点
[20:11] You let me into your home and made me a part of all that, 你们让我进入你们的家庭 并让我成为一份子
[20:15] and I’ll always be grateful. 我会永远心怀感激
[20:19] I love you guys. 我爱你们
[20:22] Dude. 哥们
[20:24] Dude. 哥们
[20:26] Dude. 哥们
[20:28] Dude. 哥们
[20:29] Enough. 够了
[20:31] Greg and I had a conversation with your parents. 我跟格雷格和你父母谈了谈
[20:35] If it’s okay with you, 如果你同意
[20:36] they said that you can live with us until you graduate high school. 他们说你毕业之前都可以和我们住在一起
[20:40] What?! 什么
[20:41] They’ll send the jet for you every other weekend. 他们会每隔一周派飞机来接你
[20:43] Really? 真的吗
[20:43] Mm-hmm. 当然
[20:45] Dude! 哥们
[20:46] Dude! 哥们
[20:46] Dude! 哥们
[20:49] Dude. 哥们
[20:58] Okay. 这样
[20:59] What if I break into a delivery room, 如果我冲进产房
[21:02] I deliver someone’s baby, 给某个人接生
[21:04] but at the last minute, I make a switch and I hand them… 但在最后一刻 我狸猫换太子 给他们…
[21:08] A live possum? 一只活负鼠
[21:10] That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. 这是我听过的最蠢的事了
[21:12] But you know what? 但你猜怎么着
[21:13] Let’s do it! 我们做吧
[21:14] Let’s just finish the book! 我们完成这本书
[21:15] Sorry, but anyone over 30 likes an idea, it can’t be good. 抱歉 但任何30以上的人喜欢的想法都肯定不好
[21:19] That’s just science, bruh. 这是科学 兄弟
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