| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | Hi everybody. I’m Jeff. Mr. Winger | 大家好 我是杰夫 翁格先生 |
| [00:06] | And this is Fundamental of Law. | 这门课是「法律基础」 |
| [00:13] | Any questions? | 有问题吗 |
| [00:15] | You, red hair. I’m not gonna learn names. | 红头发的 我不记名字 |
| [00:17] | – Will there be a syllabus? – “Will there be a syllabus?” | -有教学大纲吗 -有教学大纲吗 |
| [00:19] | is good example of a question. Moving on. | 这样的问题很好 继续 |
| [00:22] | – Ski Cap. – how are we gonna be graded? | -帽哥 -判分标准是怎样的 |
| [00:24] | Oh, no spoilers, Ski Cap. | 没有剧透哦 帽哥 |
| [00:27] | – Maybe we better do names. – Dave. | -咱们还是自报名字吧 -戴夫 |
| [00:29] | What percent of our grade will the final be? | 期末考试分数占多大比重 |
| [00:31] | come on, guys, percentages, grades, that syllabus thing… | 拜托孩子们 比例 评分 大纲什么的 |
| [00:34] | Are we human beings or just question-and-answer machines? | 我们是人类 还是问答机器 |
| [00:38] | We’re students. And you’re a teacher. | 我们是学生 你是老师 |
| [00:43] | Yeah. I’m a teacher. | 对 我是老师 |
| [00:50] | Did you see that? That teacher just leered at me. | 看到没 那个老师用眼神勾搭我 |
| [00:54] | – Ew. – Hey, look, | -恶心 -瞧啊 |
| [00:55] | It’s the star of “Head of the ass.” | 「混蛋之首」的大明星 |
| [00:58] | Shut up, Leonard! Nice earring. | 闭嘴 伦纳德 耳环不错 |
| [01:00] | You look like the road manager for the California Raisins. | 你活像「加州葡萄干」巡演经纪人 |
| [01:02] | Whoa! What kind of teacher talks to a student like that? | 哪个教师跟学生这样说话啊 |
| [01:05] | – Right? – Yeah. | -对吧 -对哦 |
| [01:14] | – Fresh meat, huh? – Yeah, Jeff Winger, Law. | -新人吗 -对 杰夫·翁格 教法律 |
| [01:18] | Buzz Hickey, Criminology. | 巴兹·汉基 教犯罪学的 |
| [01:20] | You can have that half of the office, but come spring, | 办公室的一半归你 但到了春天 |
| [01:22] | that corner is stacked to the rafters with fetal pigs. | 那个角落会堆满成串的乳猪 |
| [01:25] | I won’t be here that long. | 我不会待太久的 |
| [01:26] | This is sort of a temporary gig for me. | 这份工作是小插曲 |
| [01:28] | I get it. | 我懂的 |
| [01:29] | Teaching to make ends meet until a real job comes along, | 教书为了糊口 找到正经工作就走人 |
| [01:32] | – yeah, me too. – Oh, cool. | -跟我一样 -那挺好 |
| [01:34] | – How long have you been… – 15 years. | -你教书有… -15年了 |
| [01:38] | 15 years and counting. | 纪录还在刷新 |
| [01:40] | “Temporary gig.” | 还小插曲呢 |
| [01:43] | Oh, I like you. | 我喜欢你 |
| [02:12] | Oh, the new table turned out great, Abed. | 新桌子原来这么棒啊 阿布蒂 |
| [02:15] | Splendid varnishing. | 油漆好亮啊 |
| [02:16] | “Table mark II”? | 马克桌二代 |
| [02:18] | I added that, and a few custom upgrades. | 我加的 还做了些定制升级 |
| [02:20] | It’s voice activated. | 可以语音激活 |
| [02:21] | Table, resume table mode. | 桌子 恢复桌子模式 |
| [02:25] | Table, power down. | 桌子 关机 |
| [02:26] | Wait! I got a cup on there. | 等等 我杯子还在上边呢 |
| [02:29] | Oh, teacher man! | 哟 老师好 |
| [02:30] | – It’s professor Winger! – Mr. Winger. | -是翁格教授 -翁格先生 |
| [02:33] | Please don’t razz me about being a teacher. | 别拿我当老师的事开涮啦 |
| [02:35] | Teaching is the most noble profession in the world. | 教师是世界上最高尚的职业 |
| [02:38] | Yeah, tell that to the guy that shares my office. | 对 去跟我办公室的同僚说吧 |
| [02:39] | He fixes cuckoo clocks for fun. | 他以鼓捣布谷鸟钟为乐 |
| [02:41] | That sounds like Mr. Hickey, my criminology professor. | 怎么像是汉基先生 我的犯罪学教授 |
| [02:44] | I certainly hope you’ll be a better teacher than him. | 真心希望你当老师能比他强 |
| [02:46] | Annie, I don’t know law. | 安妮 我不懂法律 |
| [02:47] | I wasn’t a real lawyer, remember? | 我是个冒牌律师 记得吗 |
| [02:49] | I can’t just pretend I’m teaching. | 我装不了多久的 |
| [02:51] | I’m not Mythbusters. | 我不是「流言终结者」 |
| [02:53] | There’s a two-day course | 有个两天的课程 |
| [02:54] | called “Nicolas Cage: good or bad.” | 叫做「尼古拉斯·凯奇: 好还是坏」 |
| [02:56] | I’m signing up. I’ve always wanted to know. | 我选了 我一直想了解这个 |
| [02:58] | Nicolas Cage is one of pop culture’s greatest mysteries. | 尼古拉斯·凯奇是流行文化的最大谜团之一 |
| [03:00] | Oh, there’s a course on Nicolas Cage, | 有门课专门讲尼古拉斯·凯奇 |
| [03:02] | but if you mention Jesus to your science teacher, | 而你跟理科老师提耶稣 |
| [03:03] | you get a written warning. | 就会得到书面警告 |
| [03:04] | Well, Jesus wasn’t in 70 movies. | 耶稣可没演过70部电影 |
| [03:05] | I’m in. Cage class, sounds fun. | 我也选 凯奇课 听着不错 |
| [03:07] | Jeff, you don’t have time to take a blow-off class. | 杰夫 你没时间上这种没用的课 |
| [03:09] | You need to figure out what you’re gonna | 你得弄清楚要给你的学生 |
| [03:10] | – teach your students. – Thanks, annie, | -教什么内容 -谢谢 安妮 |
| [03:12] | for one glorious second, I forgot I was a teacher. | 我差一点忘记自己是一名人民教师了 |
| [03:41] | Oh! Look at Mr. Smarty Pants! | 瞧瞧咱的聪明先生 |
| [03:45] | I am so excited! | 我好兴奋啊 |
| [03:47] | Jeff is gonna help me save the school. | 杰夫要帮我拯救这所学校 |
| [03:49] | Not all by himself. I am learning Excel. | 也不是全靠他哦 我在学Excel制表 |
| [03:52] | – Jeff, do you know Excel? – No. | -杰夫 你会用Excel不 -不会 |
| [03:54] | Well, it looks like you do. | 你的长相说你会用 |
| [03:58] | Yay, teaching! | 耶 教课咯 |
| [04:02] | I, as you know, am Dramatic professor Sean Garrity, | 我就是喜剧学教授肖恩·加瑞提 |
| [04:06] | and you are now embarking on an odyssey of discussion | 你们即将进行一段史诗般的讨论 |
| [04:09] | about an actor who keeps the world asking: | 一个令全世界不停发问的演员 |
| [04:12] | Nicolas Cage, good or bad? | 尼古拉斯·凯奇 好还是坏 |
| [04:14] | Yes, young man? | 请讲 年轻人 |
| [04:16] | – So you don’t know? – Mr. Nadir. | -那你不知道答案吗 -纳德尔先生 |
| [04:18] | Mr. Nadir drove our TV studies professor out of his mind | 纳德尔先生把电视研究学的教授逼疯了 |
| [04:23] | by proving that there was an answer | 因为他一直在证明「谁是老板」 |
| [04:24] | to the question “Who’s the boss?” | 是有答案的 |
| [04:26] | – Angela. – I admire your brain, Mr. Nadir. | -是安杰拉 -我佩服您的头脑 纳德尔先生 |
| [04:29] | I did not admire professor Sheffield, | 我并不佩服谢菲尔德教授 |
| [04:33] | but I promise you, this question has no answer. | 但我对你打包票 这问题没答案 |
| [04:37] | Your homework is to watch five Nicolas Cage films by Wednesday, | 你们的作业是周三前看完五部凯奇的电影 |
| [04:40] | No marathons. | 不要连续看 |
| [04:42] | Space out your viewings. | 给自己些消化的时间 |
| [04:43] | Five, that’s it? | 就看五部呗 |
| [04:46] | Be careful, Abed nadir. | 小心点 阿布蒂·纳德尔 |
| [04:47] | Promise me you will be careful. | 向我保证你会谨慎对待 |
| [04:51] | I have no idea how to make a curriculum. | 我根本不知道怎么做课程表 |
| [04:54] | Becoming a teacher was a huge mistake. | 当老师真是个天大的错误 |
| [04:56] | Without a doubt. | 一点没错 |
| [04:58] | That said, there are certain perks. | 这说明 我们也有某种特权 |
| [05:01] | Excuse me. | 借光 |
| [05:02] | I didn’t know teachers could cut in line. | 我可不知道原来教师还能插队 |
| [05:04] | I can actually experience this food warm and disgusting. | 这食物让我感觉既温暖又恶心 |
| [05:07] | Winger, what are you doing? | 翁格 你干毛呢 |
| [05:09] | This line is for food, not for Lionel Richie tickets. | 这是排队买饭 不卖演唱会门票 |
| [05:13] | This is my house. | 这是我的地盘 |
| [05:16] | Come here. | 你过来 |
| [05:18] | This man’s name is Mr. Winger, | 他的名字是翁格先生 |
| [05:22] | And Mr. Winger is a teacher. | 翁格先生是老师 |
| [05:25] | You know what that means? | 明白什么意思吗 |
| [05:27] | It means he gets your meatballs. | 就是你要把肉丸献给他 |
| [05:31] | Ah, please. That’s all I have. | 求求您 我只有这么多了 |
| [05:37] | Get outta here. | 滚吧 |
| [05:40] | Place is a zoo. | 这地方就是动物园 |
| [05:41] | The trick is, you gotta show the other baboons | 门道就是 你要让别的狒狒知道 |
| [05:44] | you got a bigger, redder ass. | 你的屁股更红更大 |
| [05:45] | Let’s hit the lounge. | 去休息室吧 |
| [05:52] | Everybody, this is the new guy, Winger. | 伙计们 这位是新人 翁格 |
| [05:55] | He’s having trouble planning his curriculum. | 他不知道该如何做课程表 |
| [05:59] | What? | 搞毛啊 |
| [06:02] | Here’s all you need to know: | 你只需知道这些 |
| [06:04] | Break into groups, grade each other’s papers, | 分组 互相评分 |
| [06:06] | and please enjoy the seven-disc edition of Planet Earth. | 然后欣赏七碟装的「行星地球」 |
| [06:10] | Is there a Mr. Winger in here? | 翁格先生在这里吗 |
| [06:13] | Jeffrey, we need to carve out some time to learn Excel. | 杰夫瑞 我们得挤点时间出来学Excel |
| [06:16] | Do you guys know Excel? I’m learning. | 你们知道Excel吗 我在学 |
| [06:18] | You know the rules, Pelton. | 你懂规矩的 派尔顿 |
| [06:19] | Drop the checks and move on. | 扔下工资条 马上滚蛋 |
| [06:21] | Oh. Jeffrey, | 杰夫瑞 |
| [06:22] | I’m gonna boot up my computer and download the tutor… | 我要启动电脑然后下载教程 |
| [06:26] | – What was that about? – Union rules. | -这也可以吗 -工会规定 |
| [06:28] | Management’s not allowed in the faculty lounge. | 管理层与狗不得进入员工休息室 |
| [06:31] | I could get used to this. | 这个我会习惯的 |
| [06:40] | Nicolas cage is so weird. | 尼古拉斯·凯奇好奇怪哦 |
| [06:42] | I mean, he seemed scared to smell that flower | 他貌似害怕闻那朵花 |
| [06:44] | but happy to get shot. | 但却愿意被枪击 |
| [06:46] | He’s a complex performer. | 他是个复杂的演员 |
| [06:47] | He’ll give you The Rock, Con Air, then Face Off, | 演了「勇闯夺命岛」「空中监狱」和「变脸」 |
| [06:49] | and you think you understand, but then Windtalkers, | 你以为了解他了 他又去演了「风语者」 |
| [06:51] | Guarding Tess, The Wicker Man. | 「第一夫人的保镖 」 「异教徒」 |
| [06:52] | He begs you to stop watching, but you can’t. | 他祈求大家不要去看 但你欲罢不能 |
| [06:56] | That was an odd choice. | 这个选择很蹊跷 |
| [06:58] | Would you say it was odd good or odd bad? | 这个蹊跷是褒义还是贬义 |
| [06:59] | Maybe he’s just good in good movies | 也许他在好电影里演得好 |
| [07:01] | and then acts crazy in crap to make drug money. | 然后瞎演几部烂片挣点白粉钱 |
| [07:03] | But is he good, or is he bad? Every actor is something. | 但他到底是不是好演员 每个演员都有定论 |
| [07:06] | Robert Downey Jr., good, Jim Belushi, bad. | 小罗伯特·唐尼好 吉姆·贝鲁西不好 |
| [07:08] | Van Damme, the good kind of bad, | 尚格·云顿 正面角色演得差 |
| [07:09] | Johnny Depp, the bad kind of good. | 强尼·德普 反派演得好 |
| [07:11] | There’s a spectrum, and Cage is on it. | 就这么个范围 凯奇也在其中 |
| [07:13] | I just have to find him. | 我只需把他找出来就行 |
| [07:15] | I’m gonna go check on Jeff. | 我去问问杰夫 |
| [07:19] | – Hello. – hey, Jeff, how’s the old curriculum going? | -喂 -杰夫 旧课程进行得如何呀 |
| [07:23] | Great. Consider our nation’s youth pre-inspired. | 棒极了 我国青年都已经洗好脑了 |
| [07:26] | Want a refill, Winger? | 要续杯吗 翁格 |
| [07:27] | – Is that Hickey? – Yeah. | -是汉基吗 -对啊 |
| [07:29] | We’re working on syllabuses. | 我俩一起研究「教学捣肛」呢 |
| [07:30] | Hey, let’s turd some lockers! | 咱们去储物柜里拉粑粑去 |
| [07:34] | Gotta go! Teacher thing! | 挂了哈 为师去干正经事了 |
| [07:36] | It’s “Syllabi.” | 是教学大纲啦 |
| [07:38] | Guterman. Droppin’ mad science? | 古特曼 搞疯狂科学去呀 |
| [07:41] | Ooh, Elaine, take it easy on the Oxford commas. | 伊莱恩 小心使用「牛津逗号」啦 |
| [07:44] | Hey, walk, don’t run, Mister! This isn’t a racetrack! | 慢慢走 别跑 先生们 这又不是跑道 |
| [07:47] | Okay, Dangerous Minds, let’s break into groups, | 好了 危险游戏 咱们先分组 |
| [07:50] | Discuss Chapter One, and if you are lucky, | 讨论第一章 如果你们够幸运 |
| [07:53] | we might sneak in a little Planet Earth. | 咱们没准儿再看会儿「行星地球」 |
| [07:56] | Any questions? | 有问题吗 |
| [07:59] | Just a few. | 就几句 |
| [08:02] | Ahh, she in your class, yo! | 原来她在你班上哟 |
| [08:10] | So I guess, just… | 那么我想 应该… |
| [08:14] | Read Chapter One. | 阅读第一章 |
| [08:16] | And memorize the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure. | 背诵「联邦民事诉讼程序法」 |
| [08:18] | Class dismissed. | 下课 |
| [08:20] | Not so fast, Jeff. | 别那么着急 杰夫 |
| [08:26] | I assume you know why I’m keeping you after class. | 我想你也知道为什么我要留你的堂 |
| [08:28] | Not really. | 不知道 |
| [08:29] | Ski Cap and White Dave got lots of stuff wrong too. | 帽哥和白戴夫也犯了不少错啊 |
| [08:31] | You’re the teacher, Jeff. | 你可是老师啊 杰夫 |
| [08:32] | You don’t have to rub it in. | 你也没必要反复强调吧 |
| [08:33] | What I saw today was embarrassing. | 今天我看到这一切真是让人脸红 |
| [08:36] | You were late, you clearly had no idea… | 你上课迟到 很显然你完全不知道… |
| [08:38] | Hey! | 喂 |
| [08:40] | You had no idea what tort reform meant, | 你完全不晓得什么叫「侵权法改革」 |
| [08:42] | And when I asked you to explain the Sixth Amendment, | 当我要你解释一下「第六条修正案」时 |
| [08:44] | – You pled the Fifth! – I know my rights. | -你辩的是第五条 -我知道我的权利 |
| [08:45] | No, you don’t. That’s the problem. | 你不知道 这就是问题所在 |
| [08:51] | Here. I gathered some materials. | 给 我收集了一些资料 |
| [08:53] | Tomorrow morning, before class, | 明天一早 上课之前 |
| [08:55] | I need to verify that you know enough to teach. | 我需要确定你有足够的知识可以教人 |
| [08:57] | You’re gonna quiz me? You’re the worst. | 你居然要考我 你是坏人 |
| [08:59] | I wish Troy was in my class instead of you! | 我希望特洛伊在我课堂上而不是你 |
| [09:01] | I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, | 我恨她 恨她恨她恨她 |
| [09:03] | I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, I hate her, I hate her. | 我恨她 恨她恨她恨她 |
| [09:04] | Hey, wait, I warned you to separate these worlds. | 等下 我警告过你要区分好彼此的世界 |
| [09:08] | She’s lead, we’re chalk. | 她是优等生 咱们才是老大 |
| [09:13] | She needs to be taken out. | 应该把她踢出去 |
| [09:16] | Of your class. I say minus her. | 踢出你的课堂 我是指给她减分 |
| [09:19] | – Minus her? – Give her A-minuses. | -减分 -给她个A减 |
| [09:21] | It’ll drive her nuts, she’ll drop. | 肯定让她抓狂 然后弃课 |
| [09:22] | She’ll call me on it. She’ll report me. | 她会来跟我闹 她会告我的状 |
| [09:23] | Teachers don’t have to explain minuses. | 老师从来都不用解释为啥给减分 |
| [09:25] | Why do you think we invented ’em? | 不然你以为为什么要发明教师这个职业 |
| [09:28] | – She’s my friend. – Eh. | -她是我朋友 -切 |
| [09:29] | You like the Leonard meatballs? | 你喜欢伦纳德的肉丸子不 |
| [09:31] | They added something special. | 里面加了很特别的料 |
| [09:37] | It’s Leonard. | 伦纳德的肉 |
| [09:43] | Come on, I’m just messing with you. | 我跟你开玩笑呢 |
| [09:45] | You done with your bit? I’d like my earring back. | 搞定了没 把我的耳环还回来 |
| [09:48] | Yeah? | 是吧 |
| [09:49] | Go get your earring, you piece of human garbage. | 去捡呀 你个人渣 |
| [10:04] | Oh, my God. | 天哪 |
| [10:07] | Okay, hey, I have a working theory, | 嘿 我得出一个规律 |
| [10:09] | And don’t react until you’ve heard the whole thing. | 在没听完全部内容之前不要随便反应 |
| [10:10] | If you watch closely, at the seven-minute mark in Snake Eyes, | 如果你仔细看「蛇眼」的第七分钟 |
| [10:13] | You’ll notice the moment where an alien arm could’ve come up and… | 你会注意到当外星人胳膊出现时是不可能 |
| [10:15] | Abed, this isn’t worth it. | 阿布蒂 这样不值得 |
| [10:17] | Maybe Nicolas Cage is just… crazy. | 也许尼古拉斯·凯奇只是 疯了而已 |
| [10:21] | All actors are crazy, Annie. Some crazy actors are good, | 所有演员都是疯子 安妮 有些疯得好 |
| [10:23] | some are bad, but none of them are neither. | 有些疯得坏 没有人两个都没有 |
| [10:25] | There’s no such thing as both, so which one is… | 也没有人两个都是 所以哪一种是… |
| [10:26] | Nicolas Cage, huh? Oh! Oh! | 尼古拉斯·凯奇 嗷嗷 |
| [10:33] | Okay, so break into groups, | 好了 分成小组 |
| [10:35] | and then, you guys quiz each other. | 然后呢 你们互相考对方 |
| [10:38] | Mr. Winger, is that really the best use of our time? | 翁格先生 这是对宝贵时间的最好利用吗 |
| [10:41] | Seems like the value of having you here is… | 看来你在这里的价值也不过是… |
| [10:43] | I think my value as a teacher is to teach you how to learn. | 我觉得我作为老师的价值就是教你们如何学习 |
| [10:46] | I think you’re telling us we should teach ourselves. | 我觉得你说的是我们应该自己教自己 |
| [10:47] | I don’t think you’re gonna learn if I tell you how to think. | 如果我告诉你该怎么想 你是学不到东西的 |
| [10:49] | I think if you tell us what you think, | 我觉得如果你告诉我们你的想法 |
| [10:50] | then we’ll learn that. | 我们会学习到的 |
| [10:51] | I thought you should break into groups, | 我觉得你们应该分成小组 |
| [10:52] | but you failed to learn that, so your theory’s invalid. | 如果你学不到的话 那你的推理就不能成立 |
| [10:56] | Ooh, snap. | 够拽哦 |
| [11:00] | Break into groups. | 分成小组 |
| [11:01] | Mr. Winger, how did you do that? | 翁格先生 你是怎么做到的 |
| [11:04] | – Do what? – You won an argument against Annie Edison. | -什么 -你跟安妮·埃迪生辩论吵赢了耶 |
| [11:07] | You don’t argue with Annie, Garrett, | 不要跟安妮吵架 加瑞 |
| [11:08] | you let her argue with herself until she loses. | 你让她自己跟自己吵 直到她输掉就好 |
| [11:10] | – You can win by not arguing? – Yeah, Ski Cap. | -你不用吵都能赢 -没错 帽哥 |
| [11:13] | Anyone that tries to argue has already lost, | 想吵架的就已经先输掉了 |
| [11:15] | because they pick an argument to lose. | 因为他们选择了一场要输的辩论 |
| [11:17] | I mean, that’s why I never lost a case. | 所以说 我从来不输官司 |
| [11:19] | Prosecutors beat themselves, because they d…here. | 公诉人会自己打败自己 因为他们… |
| [11:23] | Because they draw a circle | 因为他们画了个圈 |
| [11:26] | around something called “The truth,” | 框住一些叫做「真相」的东西 |
| [11:28] | And they say that everything outside it is a lie. | 他们声称圆圈之外的都是谎言 |
| [11:32] | Annie. | 安妮 |
| [11:34] | Don’t cry, you were right. | 别哭了 你是对的 |
| [11:36] | I actually might enjoy teaching. | 我真的挺喜欢教书 |
| [11:38] | I’m not crying because of you. | 我哭不是因为你 |
| [11:41] | I got this from Professor Hickey. | 我从汉基教授那里得了这个 |
| [11:43] | What the hell? He gave you a dead rat? | 搞什么鬼 他给了你一只死耗子 |
| [11:45] | No, this is my witness intimidation project. | 不是 这是我的证人恐吓作业 |
| [11:47] | He gave me this. | 他给了我这个 |
| [11:49] | A-minus. | A减 |
| [11:50] | I guess I overextended my schedule. | 我想是我的课业太多了 |
| [11:53] | I’m sorry, Jeff. I have to drop your class. | 抱歉了 杰夫 我得退掉你的课了 |
| [11:57] | Okay, thoughts on Nicolas Cage. | 好 谈谈对尼古拉斯·凯奇的感想吧 |
| [12:00] | I think he’s a genius. | 我觉得他是个天才 |
| [12:02] | I mean, he keeps getting hired for some reason, | 我是说 他一直能拍片总是有原因的 |
| [12:03] | and it’s not because of his hair. | 而且绝不是因为他的头发 |
| [12:05] | I don’t know, if I was in 70 films over 30 years, | 我可不晓得 如果我能三十年拍七十部电影 |
| [12:08] | and I spent each one talking at random volumes, | 而且每部我说话的音量都不一样 |
| [12:10] | I might accidentally win an Oscar. | 没准儿我能赢个奥斯卡的吧 |
| [12:12] | I think our opinions about pop culture are fed to us | 我觉得我们对流行文化的观点是灌输我们 |
| [12:14] | by machines designed to criminalize human autonomy. | 机器设计的东西 将人类自主权定罪 |
| [12:16] | Good one. | 说得好 |
| [12:21] | Dear god. | 上帝啊 |
| [12:22] | – Abed. – No, stand back. | -阿布蒂 -别 退后 |
| [12:23] | Give him space. | 给他一点空间 |
| [12:30] | Nicolas Cage, good or bad. | 尼古拉斯·凯奇 好还是坏 |
| [12:32] | A challenge, certainly, but not unsolvable, | 当然是个挑战 但并非无解 |
| [12:36] | Because all actors have distinct values, | 因为所有演员都有不同的价值 |
| [12:39] | which I use to find answers. | 而我则利用这一点寻找答案 |
| [12:41] | Abed, how much Nicolas Cage did you… | 阿布蒂 你对尼古拉斯·凯奇做了多少… |
| [12:43] | Enough! | 够了 |
| [12:46] | I watched enough to find… the answers. | 我看了很多 足够找到答案了 |
| [12:50] | Because this… this is my reality, | 因为这是我的现实 |
| [12:53] | this is how I learned to be, and my being | 这是我的认识 而我的人生 |
| [12:56] | doesn’t allow for Nicolas… | 绝不允许尼古拉斯… |
| [12:57] | Freaking Cage, okay? | 草泥马的凯奇 |
| [13:00] | Oh, yeah! | 嗷耶 |
| [13:02] | Yeah! Oh! Oh! | 耶 嗷嗷 |
| [13:12] | Oh, I’m a cat. I’m a sexy cat. | 我是一只猫 我是一只性感猫咪 |
| [13:32] | Abed? | 阿布蒂 |
| [13:33] | Think of something safe like | 想点安心的东西 比如 |
| [13:34] | Holly Hunter, or Don Cheadle! | 荷莉·亨特或唐·钱德勒 |
| [13:38] | Abed? Abed! | 阿布蒂 阿布蒂 |
| [13:43] | That was brilliant. | 太赞了 |
| [13:48] | You gave Annie A-minus? | 你给安妮打了个A减 |
| [13:50] | How could you? What were you thinking? | 你怎么这样 你想什么呢 |
| [13:51] | – Are you drawing a peanut? – It’s a duck, | -你在画花生吗 -这是鸭子 |
| [13:54] | and it’s none of your concern, actually. | 而且这不管你的事 |
| [13:56] | Are you trying to cartoon? | 你是要画漫画吗 |
| [13:57] | Trying and succeeding. State your business. | 正努力取得成功 说你的事儿吧 |
| [14:00] | I want to know what kind of monster | 我想知道是什么样的怪物 |
| [14:01] | minuses the best student in his class. | 会给自己班上最好的学生减分 |
| [14:03] | I’m a monster? | 我是怪物 |
| [14:05] | I was in the storm drain lair of the Black River Ripper. | 我是栖息在雨水沟巢穴的黑水河开膛手 |
| [14:08] | I have seen human heads used for things other than heads, | 我目睹了人类的头脑用在头脑以外的事物上 |
| [14:11] | so you best not be calling me a monster. | 所以最好别叫我怪物 |
| [14:14] | Okay, you’re a bad teacher. | 好吧 你是个糟糕的老师 |
| [14:17] | I got her off your back. | 她不再纠缠你 多亏了我 |
| [14:18] | I was handling it. | 我明明应对得很好 |
| [14:19] | Unlike you, I know how to engage my students. | 不像你 我知道怎么鼓励我的学生 |
| [14:21] | I mean, I may not love teaching, | 我是说我或许不喜欢教书 |
| [14:23] | but I did fool around with it today, | 但我今天确实糊弄得不错 |
| [14:25] | and I may hook up with it again a few more times | 也许我还会再糊弄几次 |
| [14:27] | even if I do dump it right before Christmas. | 即使我可能会在圣诞节前撂挑子 |
| [14:29] | – We do not work for them. – Maybe we do. | -我们不是为他们而工作的 -也许是 |
| [14:31] | That does not count as an argument. | 那不算是辩护 |
| [14:33] | Yeah, well, drawing ducks doesn’t count as cartooning! | 是啊 画鸭子还不算画漫画呢 |
| [14:36] | It’s one duck, his name is Jim, | 就一只鸭子 他叫吉姆 |
| [14:38] | and publishers are interested! | 出版商们很感兴趣 |
| [14:41] | Miss Edison, good news. | 埃迪生小姐 好消息 |
| [14:43] | I talked to Professor Hickey and | 我跟汉基教授谈过 |
| [14:45] | it turns out your project was an “A.” | 原来你的作业得了A |
| [14:46] | You used your connections to change my grade? | 你走后门帮我改成绩 |
| [14:49] | No, an A-minus means you actually earned an “A,” | 不 得了A减其实代表你得了A |
| [14:51] | but your teacher doesn’t like you. | 但是老师不喜欢你 |
| [14:53] | – It’s a secret faculty thing. – What? | -这是教师队伍的小秘密 -什么 |
| [14:55] | – Are you kidding? – Et tu, Brute? | -你在开玩笑吗 -怎么连你都这样 |
| [14:57] | Am I using that right? | 我用对了吗 |
| [14:58] | I’ve been busting my butt for five years, | 我辛辛苦苦学习了五年 |
| [15:01] | and the whole thing comes down | 成绩却要看几个老废柴的脸色 |
| [15:02] | to a few old losers’ petty insecurities? | 和他们可怜的不安全感 |
| [15:05] | – Oligarchy! – Et tu, Brute! | -完全是寡头政治 -怎么连你都这样 |
| [15:08] | We’ve got to tell people! | 我们得去告诉大家 |
| [15:11] | Minuses are made up! | A减B减什么的 都是编出来的 |
| [15:15] | It’s riot time! Yeah! | 造反搞起来 |
| [15:19] | Bring me their heads! | 把他们的头颅拿来 |
| [15:22] | Pop pop! | 噼里啪啦砰砰 |
| [15:31] | Abed? I couldn’t find you at school, so I got worried. | 阿布蒂 在学校找不到你 我有点担心 |
| [15:35] | You’re throwing away all your little movies, why? | 你把你的电影都扔掉了 你干什么啊 |
| [15:38] | They have no value anymore. | 它们没有价值了 |
| [15:39] | Well, if you’re looking for something to believe in, | 如果你在寻找信仰 |
| [15:43] | I know a skinny, little Hebrew handyman you could meet. | 我可以为你引见一位瘦瘦的希伯来杂工 |
| [15:46] | I’m not going to become Christian, Shirley, | 我不会成为基督徒的 雪莉 |
| [15:48] | Or a better Muslim. | 或是一个更好的穆斯林教徒 |
| [15:50] | This was my religion. | 这是我的宗教信仰 |
| [15:51] | I thought the meaning of people was somewhere in here. | 我以为人类的意义在这其中 |
| [15:53] | Then I looked inside Nicolas Cage | 然后我看透了尼古拉斯·凯奇 |
| [15:54] | and I found a secret. | 发现了一个秘密 |
| [15:56] | People are random and pointless. | 人类随机而无意义 |
| [15:57] | well, in my religion, | 在我的宗教信仰中 |
| [15:59] | the whole point is that you can’t understand every little thing, | 最重要的事是你不会了解每一件小事 |
| [16:02] | and you know, there’s a word for people | 有个词就是给人类的 |
| [16:03] | who remind you that you’re not God, | 提醒他们你们不是上帝 |
| [16:05] | and invite you to try a little harder. | 诚邀你们再努力一点 |
| [16:07] | Prophets, Messiahs, Fung Fu pandas. | 先知 救世主 功夫熊猫 |
| [16:10] | – So Nicolas Cage is Jesus? – uh, no, | -尼古拉斯·凯奇是耶稣吗 -不 |
| [16:12] | but he clearly works in mysterious ways, | 但他行事的确诡异 |
| [16:15] | and maybe that’s just his job. | 也许那就是他的工作所在 |
| [16:18] | And that’s why critics can call him a genius or an idiot | 所以影评人可以叫他天才或是白痴 |
| [16:20] | and be right no matter what. | 不管怎样都是对的 |
| [16:21] | A demon to some and an angel to others, | 有人觉得是魔鬼 有人觉得是天使 |
| [16:23] | like a cenobite. | 就像修道士 |
| [16:24] | Excuse me, did you say cenobite? | 什么 你是说修道士吗 |
| [16:26] | Yeah, you know, cenobite, like from Hellraiser. | 是啊 修道士 「猛鬼追魂」里那个 |
| [16:27] | You like hellraiser? You know the word “Hellraiser”? | 你喜欢「猛鬼追魂」 你知道猛鬼追魂这词 |
| [16:30] | I thought Pinhead in space was a bit of a letdown, | 我觉得太空针头鬼有点扯淡 |
| [16:32] | but I’m in for the ride. | 但是我挺喜欢的 |
| [16:38] | Rise up, Greendale! | 起来吧 格林德尔 |
| [16:40] | Your teachers have been lying to you! | 你们的老师一直都在欺骗你们 |
| [16:42] | You deserve slightly higher grades! | 你们本应该拿到稍高学分的 |
| [16:46] | Slightly higher grades! Slightly higher grades! | 稍高学分 稍高学分 |
| [16:49] | The whole world is watching this! | 全世界都在看着我们 |
| [16:51] | – Yeah! – oh, Wait. | -噢耶 -等等 |
| [16:53] | I’m out of data minutes. | 我没有流量了 |
| [16:54] | The whole world will be watching this on the first of next month! | 在下个月第一天 全世界都会看着我们 |
| [16:58] | Slightly higher grades! Slightly higher grades! | 稍高学分 稍高学分 |
| [17:01] | – Jeffrey, do something! – Slightly higher grades. | -杰夫瑞 做点什么 -稍高学分 |
| [17:03] | Distract them. Take your shirt off! | 转移注意力大法 上衣脱掉 |
| [17:05] | – Here. – Slightly higher grades! | -来 我帮你 -稍高学分 |
| [17:07] | – Slightly higher grades! – Everybody, | -稍高学分 -所有人 |
| [17:09] | Calm down! Just listen! | 冷静下来 听我说 |
| [17:11] | Do you think the students and teachers at Harvard | 你们认为哈佛的学生和老师 |
| [17:14] | are at each other’s throats? | 会这样拼命大吵大闹吗 |
| [17:15] | No, because they’re all rich. | 不会 因为他们都很有钱 |
| [17:18] | We all have something in common too. | 我们也有共同点 |
| [17:21] | We all suck. We’re all broke. | 我们都很逊 都是穷光蛋 |
| [17:25] | We all just went through an entire week | 我们一整周吃恶心的肉丸餐 |
| [17:27] | of meatball lunches without even blinking. | 连眼都不眨一下的 |
| [17:30] | Oh, that’s on me. | 我的错 |
| [17:31] | I converted the lunch menu to a spreadsheet. | 我弄表格时一不小心把午餐单搞成重复的了 |
| [17:33] | The teachers here are teachers here | 学校的老师之所以来到这里 |
| [17:36] | because they did something wrong, same as the students. | 是因为他们做了错事 跟学生一样 |
| [17:41] | So get on the same team, because, take it from me, | 所以我们还在站成一队吧 听我的没错 |
| [17:45] | those of us that get to leave aren’t going anywhere. | 因为离开的那些人也好不到哪去 |
| [17:53] | – Boo! – No, you suck! | -下去吧 -你烂透了 |
| [17:56] | Jeffrey, go with my “Take off your shirt” plan! | 杰弗瑞 还是用我想出的脱衣绝技吧 |
| [17:58] | May I point out that you’re doing this together? | 我能指出你们在一起嘘我吗 |
| [18:02] | It’s all based on rows and columns of cells. | 它基于横排竖排什么的 |
| [18:06] | I think that’s why the call it “Excel.” | 所以才叫做「Excel」 |
| [18:08] | – I don’t care. – Mm-kay, | -我不关心 -好吧 |
| [18:09] | Now, I know it’s unrealistic to think that | 我知道认为我们能 |
| [18:11] | we can eliminate riots completely, | 完全制止暴动很不现实 |
| [18:13] | but I have been crunching the numbers, | 但是我经过鼓捣数字 |
| [18:15] | and I believe we can reduce them by 40%. | 我认为我们能降低到40% |
| [18:17] | Let’s hope the man doesn’t target you | 希望他们不会因为你敢于梦想 |
| [18:19] | – for dreaming this big. – Here’s my plan. | -而把你作为目标 -这是我的计划 |
| [18:21] | You know that “Save Greendale” Committee you pretended to form? | 还记得你假装成立「拯救格林德尔」委员会吗 |
| [18:24] | We need one of those for real. | 我们需要一个真正的 |
| [18:26] | I want a student/teacher alliance, with you in charge. | 我要组成一个学生/教师同盟 你来统领 |
| [18:30] | – I vote myself out. – You don’t have a quorum. | -我投票将我自己除名 -你都凑不够法定人数 |
| [18:32] | And don’t forget, if I fire you, you’re likely starve and die, | 别忘了 如果我炒了你 你可能会饿死 |
| [18:36] | so you know. | 你懂的 |
| [18:37] | Do you want me to cut your meatball? | 要我帮你切肉丸吗 |
| [18:41] | All right, look, there are two things I don’t do well, | 听着 有两件事我不擅长 |
| [18:46] | Apologies and drawing duck bills. | 道歉和画鸭舌头 |
| [18:49] | I lost perspective. | 我没搞清状况 |
| [18:50] | Students aren’t the enemy, | 学生不是敌人 |
| [18:51] | And, I don’t know, maybe my bills are a little pointy. | 怎么说呢 也许舌头画得有点尖 |
| [18:55] | Maybe I’m basing them on beaks. | 但我是根据它们嘴画的 |
| [18:57] | Apologize to Annie. | 给安妮道歉 |
| [18:59] | I did, I gave her an “A.” | 道了 我给了她A |
| [19:01] | I don’t know how else to make it right. | 我不知道还能怎么弥补 |
| [19:06] | Oh. I guess, I don’t know, I quit. | 我不知道 我辞职算了 |
| [19:11] | I got a better idea. | 我有更好的主意 |
| [19:12] | As our first order of business | 作为「拯救格林德尔」 |
| [19:14] | for the student/teacher Save Greendale committee, | 学生/教师委员会会议的第一个议题 |
| [19:17] | We hereby ban the Dean from attending future meetings. | 我们在此禁止院长再次出席 |
| [19:21] | – Yeah. – Our second order of business: | -好样的 -第二项议题 |
| [19:23] | – Lunch. – Yeah. | -午餐 -噢耶 |
| [19:38] | I’m taste-testing rations for the shelter I’m digging. | 我在为我挖的避难所试吃口粮 |
| [19:42] | Are you the coolest person in the world? | 你是世界上最酷的人吗 |
| [19:44] | I doubt it. | 恐怕不是 |
| [19:45] | I would like to address the fact that | 我想声明 |
| [19:47] | there are no Asian-americans represented here. | 委员会没有亚裔代表 |
| [19:49] | We can get Chang. | 我们可以找昌 |
| [19:50] | No need to rush into anything, I just wanted to address it. | 不必轻易做决定 我就是那么一说 |
| [19:53] | Anybody want some nuts? | 谁想吃坚果 |
| [20:08] | \h | 但今天不会学Excel |
| [20:11] | \h | 我的思绪如此法式 |
| [20:21] | – Quiet, I think Jeff’s coming. – This is gonna be hilarious. | -安静 杰夫好像来了 -肯定特好玩 |
| [20:35] | Yeah, pharmacy please. | 是的 接药房 谢谢 |
| [20:38] | Yeah, this is Buzz Hickey. | 我是巴兹·汉基 |
| [20:40] | I think you gave me the wrong medication. | 你们好像给错药了 |
| [20:42] | I usually get lipitor. | 我通常会拿到立普妥[降血脂药] |
| [20:44] | What do you mean my insurance won’t cover it anymore? | 说我的保险不能报销这药是什么意思 |
| [20:47] | My body doesn’t respond well to the generic stuff. | 通用药对我的身体不起作用 |
| [20:51] | Let me ask you a question, lady, can you pay out of pocket? | 我问你个问题 女士 你自己掏钱消费吗 |
| [20:54] | I’m an educator, ma’am, | 我是个教育工作者 女士 |
| [20:56] | living on a teacher’s salary! | 就靠教师工资过活 |
| [20:59] | No, I-I’m sorry. What’s your name? | 不 抱歉 你叫什么 |
| [21:03] | Leia, well, let me tell you something, Leia, | 莉亚 你听我说 莉亚 |
| [21:07] | I wake up every night screaming. | 我每晚都会尖叫着醒来 |
| [21:10] | Life is unfair, but it’s the only thing we g… | 生活不公平 但那只是… |
| [21:12] | Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I’ll call back later. | 好吧 我稍后再打过来 |
| [21:22] | Mom, it’s Buzz. I’m gonna say this as fast as I can. | 妈 我是巴兹 我有话直说 |
| [21:25] | We can’t afford to bury dad with the rest of the family. | 我们没钱把爸爸跟其他家人葬在一起 |