| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | So… cellular mitosis is what? | 说说 有丝分裂的定义 |
| [00:03] | I miss Troy. | 我想特洛伊了 |
| [00:05] | Wrong, and stop guessing that. | 错误答案 你也别猜那个了 |
| [00:06] | – Annie. – I’m worried about Abed. | -安妮 -我担心阿布蒂 |
| [00:08] | He hasn’t left the apartment since Troy moved out. | 自从特洛伊搬走后他就没出过公寓大门 |
| [00:10] | He won’t even play in the Dreamatorium. | 他甚至都不玩幻梦空间了 |
| [00:11] | Sorry, not “Play.” | 抱歉 不是”玩” |
| [00:12] | “Render imaginated dreamscapes.” | “表演想象中幻梦场景” |
| [00:14] | Guys, we just finished retaking biology all summer, | 大伙 我们整个暑假都在重修生物 |
| [00:17] | and if I don’t pass this final, it was for nothing. | 如果我通不过期末考试 那就白费功夫了 |
| [00:19] | Can we stay on target? | 我们能不跑题吗 |
| [00:21] | Did someone say “Sexy construction worker”? | 是不是有人提到”性感建筑工人”啊 |
| [00:23] | Stay–stay on target. | 坚持住 别跑题 |
| [00:25] | I’m dressed like this | 我打扮成这样 |
| [00:26] | because I’m building to big news. | 是因为我要创造重大新闻 |
| [00:29] | Subway has officially ended its agreement with Greendale, | 赛百味跟格林德尔的合约已经正式终止 |
| [00:33] | and the restaurant I’ve chosen to occupy the cafeteria kiosk is… | 而我选来填补自助餐厅空缺的店铺就是 |
| [00:38] | Shirley’s Sandwiches! | 雪瑞三明治 |
| [00:41] | I just need one of you to sign this | 我只需要你俩中的一个 |
| [00:43] | as the official owner of the business. | 作为官方代表签署这份合约 |
| [00:45] | Ooh, we should both sign it, we’re 50-50 partners. | 我们俩都该签字 股份对半开的 |
| [00:47] | But there’s only one dotted line on the form, so… | 但是表格上只有一条虚线 所以… |
| [00:49] | – Oh, well, Pierce can– – Me. | -这样的话 皮尔斯可以 -我来 |
| [00:51] | – Hey! – I paid for it. | -凭什么 -我出的钱 |
| [00:52] | Well, there’d be no “it” to pay for | 要是没有我艰苦卓绝的努力 |
| [00:53] | if I hadn’t done all the work. | 你有钱也没处使 |
| [00:55] | My goodness, this molehill is becoming a mountain. | 哎呦 小小罅隙积怨逐重高若大山了呢 |
| [00:58] | You guys work it out, | 你们努力解决 |
| [00:59] | while I put together an alpine costume. | 我去捯饬一套登山装 |
| [01:01] | I knew eventually you’d try to box me out of my own business, | 我就知道你早晚要鸠占鹊巢 |
| [01:04] | just like Hawthorne Wipes did. | 就跟霍桑纸业一个德行 |
| [01:06] | I’m not letting you guilt me | 我可不会容忍你 |
| [01:07] | into letting you call yourself the owner of my company. | 利用我的同情心霸占我的生意 |
| [01:11] | Jeff! Hello? | 杰夫 发什么呆 |
| [01:12] | – Get involved. – No. | -帮帮他俩 -不 |
| [01:14] | I am here to replace my fake bachelor’s | 我来这里是为了拿到真正的文凭 |
| [01:17] | so I can get back to my life as a lawyer. | 好重回律师生涯 |
| [01:19] | Nobody else is sacrificing their interests. | 人不为己天诛地灭 |
| [01:21] | Don’t ask me to sacrifice mine. | 别强求我做牺牲 |
| [01:22] | Don’t ask me to sacrifice mine. | 别强求我做牺牲 |
| [01:25] | That’s you just now. | 你刚才就这语气 |
| [01:28] | Okay, so name the stages of mitosis. | 好了 说出有丝分裂的四个阶段 |
| [01:31] | – Ooh, I gotta go. – Unbelievable. | -我得走了 -难以置信 |
| [01:34] | Today is Abed’s first therapy session. | 今天是阿布蒂心理治疗第一疗程 |
| [01:36] | His what? | 什么治疗 |
| [01:36] | He’s been feeling extra vulnerable lately | 他最近感到极度的脆弱 |
| [01:38] | having lost Troy to the air conditioning repair school, | 因为特洛伊被空调维修学院抢走了 |
| [01:41] | so he’s finally gonna let me | 所以他终于同意让我 |
| [01:42] | practice my psych skills on him. | 在他身上演练心理治疗技巧 |
| [01:44] | Give me some credit, Winger. | 对我有点信心 翁格 |
| [01:46] | What’s the worst that could happen? | 再坏能坏到哪儿去 |
| [01:47] | Classic tee-up. | 典型的”垫高球托”法则 |
| [01:47] | 高尔夫术语 比喻降低自己 垫高别人 使其颇为自信却也无法离开自己 | |
| [01:48] | Shut up, leonard, I know about your crooked wang. | 闭嘴 伦纳德 我知道你小弟弟折弯了 |
| [01:51] | No such thing as bad press. | 这种事没什么见不得人的 |
| [01:57] | Hey, Abed. | 嗨 阿布蒂 |
| [02:07] | This can’t be good. | 大事不妙 |
| [02:36] | There are those who ask, why connect the capillary tube | 有些人问 为什么要把毛细管 |
| [02:40] | directly to the compressor valve? | 与压缩机阀直接连通呢 |
| [02:43] | Oh, sure, why not just attach it | 可不是么 干嘛不直接把它 |
| [02:45] | to the moisture accumulator? | 接到吸湿器上算了 |
| [02:48] | Hey, Troy. We boring you? | 我说 特洛伊 你觉得无聊吗 |
| [02:50] | I miss my friends. | 我怀念我的朋友们 |
| [02:51] | He misses his friends. | 他想他的小伙伴们了 |
| [02:55] | Mr. Barnes… | 巴恩斯先生… |
| [02:56] | Gather your things and come with me. | 收好你的东西跟我来 |
| [03:00] | Now! | 马上 |
| [03:02] | The sun chamber. | 烈阳室 |
| [03:03] | A shameful relic from a savage chapter of our history. | 这是我们学院杀伐历史中留下的可耻遗迹 |
| [03:07] | Repairmen would duel each other inside, | 修理工们明争暗斗自相残杀 |
| [03:09] | losers succumbing to heat exhaustion, or worse. | 失败者们中暑而死 或者下场更惨 |
| [03:13] | Troy, there is a prophesy. | 特洛伊 有一个神谕 |
| [03:16] | I miss Abed so much. | 我想死阿布蒂了 |
| [03:17] | I’m ashamed to confess that I once thought | 我羞于承认 曾几何时 |
| [03:21] | that this might be me. | 我以为自己是背负神谕的人 |
| [03:23] | Now I realize that it’s you. | 现在我意识到那是你 |
| [03:26] | You are the true repairman, Troy. | 你是真正的修理工 特洛伊 |
| [03:29] | You fix not only air conditioners… | 你不仅能修复空调… |
| [03:32] | But the men who fix them. | 还能平息修理工之间的争端 |
| [03:35] | It’s a trade school. It’s a two-year degree | 这就是所专科学校 两年的学制 |
| [03:38] | in boxes that make rooms cold. | 研究的是给房间制冷的小盒子 |
| [03:41] | Sir, there’s been a flow duct rupture in quadrant four. | 头儿 第四象限的流管道破裂 |
| [03:43] | I’ll handle it. | 我来处理 |
| [03:45] | This is your destiny, Mr. Barnes. | 这是你的使命 巴恩斯先生 |
| [03:47] | The true repairman will repair man. | 真正的修理工能修复人心 |
| [03:56] | Abed. | 阿布蒂 |
| [03:58] | I’m not talking to you because I’m not crazy. | 我不会跟你说话的 因为我没疯 |
| [04:00] | Think of it as inner dialogue. | 就当这是内心独白吧 |
| [04:01] | I’m reading the novelization of Chronicles of Riddick. | 我在阅读《星际传奇》小说 |
| [04:04] | Can you honestly tell me that’s a saner decision? | 你敢告诉我这是个正确的决定吗 |
| [04:06] | You’re worried you’ll go crazy without Troy. | 你担心自己离了特洛伊会发疯 |
| [04:08] | That’s why you’re gonna let Britta fix you, right? | 所以你才让布雷塔来治疗你 对吗 |
| [04:11] | Because you think you’re broken, | 因为你认为自己有缺陷 |
| [04:12] | you’re gonna get diagnosed by someone | 你真的要让一个将”X战警”视为 |
| [04:13] | who said her favorite superhero was “X man”? | 最爱的超级英雄的人给你下诊断吗 |
| [04:15] | I’m a little scared. Things are bad. | 我有点害怕 事态很糟 |
| [04:18] | When the world gets bad enough, Abed, | 阿布蒂 当整个世界堕落的时候 |
| [04:19] | the good go crazy. But the smart… | 好人会发疯 但聪明人 |
| [04:23] | they go bad. | 则会黑化 |
| [04:25] | Come on in here, let’s talk about it. | 进来吧 我们谈谈 |
| [04:28] | I think it’s safer if I talk to Britta. | 我认为还是跟布雷塔谈比较好 |
| [04:29] | I think it’s even safer if I talk to her first. | 我认为还是我先跟她谈谈更好 |
| [04:33] | Hello. | 你好啊 |
| [04:35] | Are you here to help me with biology, | 你是来帮我复习生物的吗 |
| [04:37] | or get me to help you? | 还是有求于我 |
| [04:39] | – Bi-ol-o-gy. – Are you lying? | -生…物…啊 -你在撒谎吗 |
| [04:41] | Hard to break the word “yes” into lilting syllables, huh? | 很难抑扬顿挫地说出”是” 对不对 |
| [04:44] | Ye-es? | 是…啊 |
| [04:46] | Look, Pierce and I are so close | 听着 皮尔斯和我马上就能 |
| [04:48] | to getting the sandwich shop going. | 让三明治小店开张了 |
| [04:49] | – I just need you to help– – Look. | -我只是需要你帮忙 -听着 |
| [04:51] | You want one piece of free advice? | 你想要一句免费的忠告吗 |
| [04:52] | Let Pierce cool down. | 稳住皮尔斯 |
| [04:54] | You know how crazy and paranoid he can get. | 你知道他发起疯来能偏执到什么地步 |
| [04:55] | A-ha! Crazy? Paranoid? Impotent? | 逮到你了 发疯 偏执 有心无力吗 |
| [04:59] | – Cellular… – I knew you’d run to Jeff, | -细胞… -我就知道你会来找杰夫 |
| [05:01] | – and turn him against me. – Mitosis. | -并策反他跟我对着干 -有丝分裂 |
| [05:03] | Guys, why are we yelling? | 大伙 这是嚷什么呢 |
| [05:05] | You sign that paper, I’ll sue. | 你敢签合同 我就告你 |
| [05:06] | Well, hold on. | 等等 |
| [05:07] | This will be settled in Greendale court, 3:00 P.M. | 本案将于下午三点由格林德尔法庭审理 |
| [05:10] | Obviously, Shirley has her counsel, | 显然雪瑞已经找好律师了 |
| [05:12] | and I get to dress like a judge. | 而我又能cos法官咯 |
| [05:15] | I was born in a courtroom, | 我就是在法庭出生的 |
| [05:16] | sued it for my own placenta, and won. | 跟我的胎盘来了番殊死搏斗并得以胜出 |
| [05:19] | Now I’m calling my lawyer. | 现在我要给我律师打电话了 |
| [05:23] | My biology final is at 5:00. | 我的生物期末考试五点开始 |
| [05:27] | I’m available from 3:00 to 4:00. | 三点到四点间我有空 |
| [05:30] | I’ll see you in court. | 法庭上见 |
| [05:32] | Hello, Abed? Ready to get therapized? | 阿布蒂 在吗 准备好接受心理治疗没 |
| [05:36] | Abed? | 阿布蒂 |
| [05:46] | Hello, Britta. | 你好 布雷塔 |
| [05:51] | Come in. | 请进 |
| [05:54] | What’s going on? | 这是怎么回事 |
| [05:55] | Vice Dean Laybourne was repairing a flow duct rupture, | 副院长莱伯恩在修理破裂的流管道时 |
| [05:58] | and he inhaled a lethal dose of freon. | 吸入了致命剂量的氟利昂 |
| [06:07] | May his breeze join the wind. | 愿他的灵魂轻舞飞扬 |
| [06:13] | Okay, so mitosis is when cells divide… | 有丝分裂即细胞分裂为… |
| [06:16] | I wonder who Pierce is gonna get to represent him. | 我很好奇皮尔斯会请谁作为他的代理律师 |
| [06:18] | I promise, whoever Pierce brings | 我保证 无论皮尔斯请到谁 |
| [06:20] | won’t be prepared for me. That’s the Winger guaran– | 都无法与我相匹敌 这是翁格的保证 |
| [06:23] | Is that the cold-blooded former colleague | 那是你的冷血前同事吗 |
| [06:24] | that got you fired from your old law firm | 就是他向州律师公会告发你 |
| [06:26] | by ratting on you to the state bar? | 害你被前律所解雇的吗 |
| [06:27] | Tee. | 球托 |
| [06:34] | So is this a conflict of interest? | 所以这算是利益冲突吗 |
| [06:36] | You know, Alan working at your former firm and all? | 你懂的 艾伦在你的前律所工作啥的 |
| [06:38] | Hey, Pierce just did you the biggest favor of your life. | 皮尔斯可帮了你大忙了 |
| [06:40] | He hired a guy I’ve spent the last two years | 他请来的这个小子 就是两年来 |
| [06:42] | fantasizing about stabbing in the–Sundance! | 让我恨不得一刀捅…霸王弟 |
| [06:44] | Tango! | 探戈兄 |
| [06:46] | So…the case of the Sandwich signature. | 哎哟 接下三明治店归属案啦 |
| [06:50] | What are you doing here? | 你怎么来了 |
| [06:51] | I mean, me, I have to, but you? | 我嘛 是生活所迫 你来搅和啥啊 |
| [06:52] | Hawthorne’s a cash cow, | 霍桑可是款爷 |
| [06:53] | And old a-con here is tugging at that teat. | 咱老江湖 有油水就要挤 |
| [06:58] | That’s money. | 钱来了 |
| [06:59] | Money. | 钱来了 |
| [07:01] | Please stop that. | 别挤了 |
| [07:02] | So full disclosure. The firm would really like | 跟你说白了吧 事务所发话了 |
| [07:05] | to keep vitamin “P” in its medicine chest. | 要抓牢皮爷不撒手 |
| [07:09] | Full disclosure. | 我也跟你说白了 |
| [07:10] | I really want to be done by 4:00. | 咱最好四点前完事 |
| [07:11] | Oh, that’s the Jeff Wing basket I remember loving. | 哎哟 你风采不减当年啊 |
| [07:14] | Hey, just go easy on Shirley. | 你对雪瑞客气点 |
| [07:15] | Scout’s honor, Sinead O’connor. | 以童子军名誉发誓 西尼德·奥康娜 |
| [07:17] | Oy-yay, oy-yay, the honorable Craig Pelton presiding. | 辣妹子辣 辣妹子辣 院长法官驾到啦 |
| [07:22] | First off, there’s one decision | 首先 请各位帮个忙 |
| [07:24] | I’ll need your help making. | 帮我参考一下 |
| [07:26] | judging Amy judge Judy? | 是扮艾米法官还是朱迪 |
| [07:29] | You say your name is evil Abed, | 你说你是邪恶阿布蒂 |
| [07:31] | which does not throw me, because I’m a therapist. | 我呢也觉得不奇怪 谁叫咱是心理医生呢 |
| [07:34] | So let’s talk about evil. | 就聊聊邪恶吧 |
| [07:40] | You know what? Maybe I should talk to good Abed instead. | 算了 我还是先跟良民阿布蒂聊一聊吧 |
| [07:42] | Where I come from, his name is lame Abed. | 在我的国度里 他那种称为矬人 |
| [07:44] | – And you come from… – The darkest timeline. | -你哪国的 -平行时空里最黑暗的深渊 |
| [07:47] | You might call it the britta of timelines, | 也可以叫布雷塔时空 |
| [07:49] | where everything is the worst. | 因为在那个时空 一切都混乱不堪 |
| [07:50] | Jeff has one arm there. Annie shot Pierce. | 杰夫是独臂 安妮朝皮尔斯开枪 |
| [07:52] | Troy can’t speak– | 特洛伊是哑巴 |
| [07:53] | Now we’re getting somewhere. I think lame Abed sent you | 我听出眉目了 矬人阿布蒂让你代言 |
| [07:57] | to talk because you’re more equipped to deal with fear. | 是因为你比较擅长于处理恐慌情绪 |
| [08:00] | That’s the lame way of seeing it, yes. | 以矬人之心度神人之腹 意思倒也差不多 |
| [08:02] | Here’s the truth. | 这么跟你说吧 |
| [08:04] | I’ve crossed into your dark timeline, | 我已经进入了你的黑暗时空 |
| [08:06] | And now I’m going to darken it. | 而且要让它愈加黯淡 |
| [08:08] | How? | 你要干什么 |
| [08:08] | Tell me about your parents, Britta. | 你父母什么情况 布雷塔 |
| [08:10] | Um…no? | 不告诉你 |
| [08:16] | Barnes, you should be in the chapel. | 巴恩斯 你应该待在殡仪馆的 |
| [08:18] | We lost a great man today. | 英才辞世 该好生缅怀 |
| [08:19] | Yeah, he was the best, wasn’t he? | 是啊 他的确是一代英才 |
| [08:21] | That’s why I don’t understand | 正因为如此 我更不明白了 |
| [08:22] | how he could rupture a freon line. | 他怎么会把氟利昂管搞爆了 |
| [08:26] | that’s kind of a rookie mistake. | 这可是低级错误 |
| [08:27] | I’m sure it was just a faulty valve. | 应该是阀门有问题吧 |
| [08:29] | My first order as vice dean, | 我上任副院长的第一个指示 |
| [08:30] | I’m gonna have them all replaced. | 就是要把阀门都换了 |
| [08:31] | So you’re vice dean now? | 你是副院长了吗 |
| [08:33] | Why the sudden interest in air conditioning repair? | 你怎么突然关心起空调维修的事儿了 |
| [08:35] | I thought you missed your friends. | 你不是念念不忘老同学吗 |
| [08:36] | – I do. – Then go be with them. | -是啊 -那就去找他们 |
| [08:38] | I’m releasing you. | 我放你走 |
| [08:40] | – But you– – Good-bye, Troy. | -可是 -再见 特洛伊 |
| [08:47] | Miss Edison, do you recognize the baby in that picture? | 埃迪生小姐 你认得照片里这个孩子吗 |
| [08:50] | That’s Shirley’s baby ben. | 是雪瑞的孩子 本 |
| [08:52] | Would you think less of Shirley Bennett | 要是你知道雪瑞·伯纳德 |
| [08:55] | if she offered to sell Ben on craigslist | 为了跟丹泽尔打一炮愿意上网卖儿子 |
| [08:58] | for a chance to bump it with Denzel? | 你会因此看扁她吗 |
| [09:01] | That was a joke for my cousin. | 那是跟我家人说笑的 |
| [09:03] | Damn those facebook privacy settings. | 都怪脸谱网那不靠谱的隐私设置 |
| [09:05] | – Jeff, do something. – He’s got nothing. | -杰夫 想想办法 -他什么料也没有 |
| [09:07] | I’m sure she didn’t mean that. | 她肯定不是说真的 |
| [09:08] | Or perhaps she doesn’t even love that baby, | 说不定她根本不爱自己的儿子 |
| [09:12] | because she spent most of last year not even knowing | 因为她去年一整年都在纠结 |
| [09:16] | – who the father is. – objection. | -孩子他爹到底是谁 -反对 |
| [09:18] | Establishing character, your honor. | 臆断原告人品 法官大人 |
| [09:19] | This woman is clearly unfit to own a sandwich shop. | 这个女人明显不适合当店铺主人 |
| [09:21] | Alan, come on. | 艾伦 省省吧 |
| [09:24] | No furths. | 没有问题了 |
| [09:29] | I thought you said you were gonna go easy. | 你不是答应对她客气点吗 |
| [09:30] | Felt easy to me. | 我觉得挺客气了 |
| [09:34] | What was he wearing? | 他当时穿的什么 |
| [09:35] | He was dressed as a dinosaur. | 扮成恐龙的样子 |
| [09:37] | Is that why you dropped out of high school? | 你是因为这个才高中退学的吗 |
| [09:38] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [09:39] | Are those even real glasses? | 你戴的是真眼镜吗 |
| [09:40] | No. | 不是 |
| [09:41] | Ah, do you feel that, Britta? | 你感觉到了没 布雷塔 |
| [09:43] | Your timeline’s 10% darker now. | 你的时空比原来黯淡了百分之十 |
| [09:45] | This was 10%? | 这才百分之十 |
| [09:47] | Do you know what kind of person becomes a psychologist, Britta? | 知道什么人才会当心理医生吗 布雷塔 |
| [09:49] | A person that wishes, deep down, | 就是那种内心深处非常渴望 |
| [09:50] | that everyone more special than them was sick, | 那些比他们有意思的人都有病 |
| [09:52] | because “Healthy” | 这样”无趣”的他们 |
| [09:53] | Sounds so much more exciting than “Boring.” | 就可以自我安慰为”心理健康”了 |
| [09:56] | You’re average, Britta Perry. | 你就是庸人一个 布雷塔·派利 |
| [09:57] | You’re every kid on the playground that didn’t get picked on. | 你就是那种没人看得上的小孩 |
| [10:00] | You’re a business casual potted plant, | 毫无特色的打工妹 |
| [10:01] | A human white sale. | 没人要的可怜虫 |
| [10:02] | You’re VH1, Robocop2, | 你就是《VH1》《机械战警2》 |
| [10:04] | Aback to The Future 3. | 《回到未来3》 |
| [10:05] | You’re the center slice of a square cheese pizza. | 你就是方形芝士披萨最中间那一片 |
| [10:07] | Actually, that sounds delicious. | 感觉还挺好吃的 |
| [10:09] | I’m the center slice of a square cheese pizza. | 我才是方形芝士披萨最中间那一片 |
| [10:11] | You’re Jim Belushi. | 你是吉姆·贝鲁什 |
| [10:15] | 12% 12% | |
| [10:19] | Where are you going? | 你去哪里 |
| [10:20] | To make this timeline the darkest of all. | 把黑暗带给每个人 |
| [10:22] | Starting with your lame hero, Jeff Winger. | 就从你们的矬人英雄 杰夫·翁格开始 |
| [10:24] | I don’t suppose lame Abed owns a bone saw. | 矬人阿布蒂应该没有骨锯吧 |
| [10:44] | So, Pierce, you’re seeking full ownership of Shirley’s sandwiches. | 皮尔斯 你来争取雪瑞三明治店的完全所有权 |
| [10:48] | After all, you did provide 100% of the financing. | 因为资金完全出自你 |
| [10:52] | Correct. | 对 |
| [10:53] | You really did? Oh, damn it. | 真的吗 该死 |
| [10:55] | Jeez, I came to this thing unprepared. | 老天 我果然没准备好 |
| [10:57] | I mean, I-I guess it’s my job to somehow tarnish you | 我本来 应该在法庭之上 |
| [11:01] | in the eyes of the court, but, uh… | 挑出你的毛病 可是 |
| [11:04] | – Let me check my notes. – Take your time. | -我查一下笔记 -慢慢查 |
| [11:06] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [11:08] | Hey, uh, while I’m doing this… | 我在这边查着 |
| [11:10] | Does anybody know any funny jokes? | 谁能在一边说个笑话什么的 |
| [11:13] | I do. | 我来 |
| [11:14] | An Irish and a Jew walk | 一个爱尔兰人和一个犹太人 |
| [11:16] | into a Chinese laundry… | 走进一家中国洗衣店 |
| [11:18] | with a gay duck. | 还带着一只基佬鸭子 |
| [11:20] | – All right, okay! – Oh, right! | -行了 -行了 |
| [11:21] | So you’re telling me they’re not good at basketball? | 你们是想说他们不会打篮球咯 |
| [11:23] | I have no questions, your honor. | 我没有问题了 法官大人 |
| [11:37] | Cruel. Cruel, cruel, cruel. | 残酷 残酷 残酷 残酷 |
| [11:39] | In the name of the five winds… | 以五风之名 |
| [11:41] | East, west, north, | 东风 西风 北风 |
| [11:44] | the one we keep secret, and south, | 秘风和南风 |
| [11:46] | I hereby proclaim you– | 在此 我授你为 |
| [11:49] | This ceremony is a lie. | 这仪式就是扯淡 |
| [11:50] | And having a special room for it | 为了这种屁事还腾出一间房 |
| [11:51] | is a waste of valuable floor space. | 简直就是浪费空间 |
| [11:53] | You are no longer a student here. | 你已经不是这里的学生了 |
| [11:55] | And we use this room for yoga on weekends. | 而且这间房周末还用作瑜伽房呢 |
| [11:58] | – Remove him. – I am the truest repairman. | -让他走 -我是最真实的修理工 |
| [12:03] | And this man is a dishonor | 而这个人 |
| [12:05] | to making air conditioners work good. | 不配修空调 |
| [12:06] | And I have the right to challenge him… | 我有权对他提出挑战 |
| [12:09] | In the sun chamber. | 我们去烈阳室对决 |
| [12:11] | Holy crap. | 我勒个去 |
| [12:13] | Your less than honor, can I call a recess? | 法官小哥 我请求休庭 |
| [12:16] | Ooh, yay, costume change. | 好耶 可以换装咯 |
| [12:17] | Court briefly adjourned. | 短暂休庭 |
| [12:20] | What are you trying to do, Winger? | 你想怎么样 翁格 |
| [12:22] | Zealously represent your client? | 别跟我说什么认真打官司 |
| [12:24] | Let me make things a little easier for you. | 我跟你打开天窗说亮话吧 |
| [12:27] | Figure out a way to throw this case, | 想办法撇掉这案子 |
| [12:29] | or figure out where you’re gonna work | 不然就得想清楚你在毕业后 |
| [12:31] | when you get out of here, because I don’t know | 去哪里工作 怎么说呢 |
| [12:32] | where it’s gonna be if it’s not for us. | 如果我们公司不要你的话 |
| [12:34] | That’s right, Jeff. I went there. | 没错 杰夫 我就要玩得这么大 |
| [12:37] | You drove me there. Miss Daisy’s in the house, | 你开车送我的 戴茜小姐在家 |
| [12:40] | thanks for the ride, sorry about slavery. | 多谢你开车载我 对于奴隶制我很抱歉 |
| [12:42] | Don’t oversell your clout, Alan. | 别把自己吹得跟一把手似的 艾伦 |
| [12:43] | You’re partner because I sold you to Ted. | 你能做合伙人 是因为我向泰德推荐你 |
| [12:45] | – Ted respects me– – Ted’s gone. | -泰德很尊重我的意见 -泰德走了 |
| [12:47] | He got too old, couldn’t swim with the sharks, and got eaten. | 他太老了 游不过鲨鱼 被吃了 |
| [12:50] | That makes no sense. He started the firm. | 胡说八道 公司是他创立的 |
| [12:52] | You can’t lose your own firm. | 自己公司怎么会混不下去 |
| [12:53] | You can if you’re dead. | 死了就会呀 |
| [12:54] | That shark thing was not a metaphor. | 鲨鱼那事不是比喻 |
| [12:56] | I’m the big dog now. | 现在我是当家老大了 |
| [12:58] | So you want the last three years | 如果你希望在这所不入流学校 |
| [13:01] | in this toilet to have a point? | 熬的三年 有点意义的话 |
| [13:03] | Then I’m the guy you got to make happy. | 那你就得哄我开心 |
| [13:05] | Or, you know, you could finish up your big win here. | 或者 享受你最后的一次胜利吧 |
| [13:07] | Court is in session. | 开庭 |
| [13:09] | Blind justice presiding– aah! Oh, my god! | 蒙眼的正义女神将主持 我的妈呀 |
| [13:13] | Ahh! Oh, one more recess. | 再次休庭 |
| [13:17] | I hit the corner right on a fresh tattoo. | 桌角正好撞到新纹的纹身上 |
| [13:20] | Well boys and girls, | 先生们女士们 |
| [13:23] | I hope you brought your popsicles, | 希望各位带了冰棍 |
| [13:26] | Because it’s about to get scalding hot | 因为在烈阳室里 |
| [13:31] | in the sun chamber. | 将会炙热似火 |
| [13:34] | You already know the rules… | 大家都知道规则 |
| [13:37] | Because there aren’t any! | 那就是没有规则 |
| [13:41] | Jeez, Dennis, are you on coke? | 老天 丹尼斯 磕药磕傻了吧 |
| [13:43] | Take that crap off and sit down. | 脱掉这些鬼东西 坐下吧 |
| [13:47] | Sorry about that. Of course there are rules. | 不好意思 当然是有规则的 |
| [13:50] | Two men are sealed in the chamber, | 两人进入密封的小房间里 |
| [13:52] | each with a broken unit. | 房间里各有一台坏掉的空调 |
| [13:53] | The heat will increase until one man yields… | 房间温度会不断上升 直到有人认输 |
| [13:56] | Or dies. | 或是死亡 |
| [13:57] | Begin! | 开始 |
| [14:11] | You’re just in time for Jeff’s closing statements. | 你刚好赶上杰夫的结案陈词 |
| [14:13] | Who cares? Everything is terrible. | 谁在乎啊 世界是黑暗的 |
| [14:15] | Oh, no. Have you been watching Dance Moms again? | 不是吧 你又看《妈妈舞者》了[真人秀] |
| [14:17] | I’m thinking of dyeing my hair. | 我想染头发 |
| [14:22] | Evil Abed, what are you doing? | 黑化阿布蒂 你干什么 |
| [14:23] | I’m going to cut off Jeff Winger’s arm. | 我去切掉杰夫·翁格的胳膊 |
| [14:24] | I won’t let you. That’s horrible. | 我不允许 太恐怖了 |
| [14:25] | Don’t you mean dark? Welcome to my world. | 你是说恶毒吧 欢迎来到我的世界 |
| [14:35] | Jeff! Winger! | 杰夫 翁格 |
| [14:42] | Jeffrey, this is a– a terrible situation | 杰夫瑞 我让你陷入了这样 |
| [14:44] | for me to have put you in. | 进退两难的境地 |
| [14:45] | A guy like Alan isn’t above making trouble for you | 艾伦这家伙原来在公司 |
| [14:47] | – at your old firm. – Shirley, I– | -就给你小鞋穿 -雪瑞 我… |
| [14:49] | It’s not worth your career. | 这事不值得你搭上前程 |
| [14:52] | I want you to have what you want. | 我希望你能够心想事成 |
| [14:56] | – Thank you, Shirley. – Settle down. | -谢谢 雪瑞 -安静 |
| [14:58] | Okay, Jeffrey, let’s have your closing statement. | 好了 杰夫瑞 请做结案陈词 |
| [15:33] | Your honor… | 法官大人 |
| [15:34] | I have no closing statement, | 我不会做结案陈词 |
| [15:35] | because I’m throwing the case. | 因为我拒绝受理此案 |
| [15:37] | No, no, it’s okay. | 不 没事的 |
| [15:38] | It’s fine, don’t worry. | 没事 别担心 |
| [15:40] | My client, Shirley Bennett, | 我的当事人 雪瑞·伯纳德 |
| [15:41] | my friend of three years, | 我三年来的好朋友 |
| [15:42] | she told me that it was okay. | 她说不受理没关系 |
| [15:44] | She said what I want was more important. | 她说我的需求更重要 |
| [15:49] | She’s right, right? | 她说的对 对吗 |
| [15:51] | I mean, guys like me, | 像我这样的人 |
| [15:53] | we’ll tell you there’s no right or wrong. | 会告诉你世上没有对错可言 |
| [15:55] | There’s no real truth. | 没有绝对的真相 |
| [15:58] | I’ll kill you. | 我会杀了你 |
| [15:59] | I’ll kill you just like I killed him. | 我杀了他 我也会杀了你 |
| [16:02] | And as long as we all believe that, | 只要哄得大家都信了 |
| [16:04] | guys like me can never lose. | 像我这样的人就永远也不会输了 |
| [16:07] | Was that out loud? | 我大声说出来了吗 |
| [16:08] | Because the truth is… | 因为真相是 |
| [16:11] | I’m lying when I say there is no truth. | 我说没有真相是句谎话 |
| [16:14] | The truth is– the pathetically, stupidly, | 真相是 可悲的 愚蠢的 |
| [16:18] | inconveniently obvious truth is… | 尴尬的明显真相是 |
| [16:22] | Helping only ourselves is bad, | 只为自己着想是自私的 |
| [16:24] | and helping each other is good. | 为他人考虑才是伟大的 |
| [16:28] | Now I just wanted to get out of here, | 现在我只想离开这里 |
| [16:30] | pass biology, and be a lawyer again | 通过生物课考试 再次成为律师 |
| [16:32] | instead of helping Shirley. | 而不是在这里帮助雪瑞 |
| [16:34] | That was bad. | 这样不对 |
| [16:35] | And my former colleague | 而我的前同事 |
| [16:36] | wanted so badly to keep his rich client | 非常可怜地想留住阔佬客户 |
| [16:40] | that he just asked me to roll over | 不惜以提供我工作为诱 |
| [16:42] | in exchange for my old job. | 让我放弃官司 |
| [16:45] | So I guess we all walked in here pretty bad. | 所以我想 我们都是以自私的心态来到这 |
| [16:49] | But now… | 但现在 |
| [16:51] | Shirley’s gone good. | 雪瑞做出了无私的举动 |
| [16:53] | Shirley’s helping me. | 雪瑞在帮助我 |
| [16:54] | It’s that easy. | 其实很简单 |
| [16:56] | You just stop thinking about what’s good for you, | 只要不再为自己的私利打算 |
| [16:59] | and start thinking about what’s good for someone else. | 而是设身处地地为他人着想 |
| [17:12] | And you can change the whole game | 你可以改变整个游戏 |
| [17:14] | with one move. | 只要一个善举就行 |
| [17:21] | Now if you like this idea, you can make it true | 如果你认同这个观点 你可以通过 |
| [17:24] | by doing something good for everyone here. | 帮助身边人使之成为真相 |
| [17:28] | Throw this case out of court. It’s dumb. | 别再审了 这官司完全没意义 |
| [17:31] | That is all. | 陈词完毕 |
| [17:34] | I withdraw my case. | 我撤回起诉 |
| [17:36] | Why didn’t you just do some | 你怎么不来段关于友谊的 |
| [17:37] | inspirational speech about friendship? | 激情澎湃的演讲 |
| [17:39] | You’re fired. | 你被炒了 |
| [17:47] | Way to go, soft serve. You’re finished. | 好样的 煽情专业户 你的事业结束了 |
| [17:50] | By the way, never got a chance to tell you this, | 对了 从来没机会告诉你 |
| [17:52] | but it was me who turned you in to the state bar. | 是我向律师协会告发你的 |
| [17:55] | I know. | 我知道 |
| [17:57] | And I never got a chance to thank you. | 我从来没机会谢谢你 |
| [17:59] | This place has made you so gay. | 这破地方让你变得太基情了 |
| [18:01] | Hey! Don’t use “Gay” as a derogatory term. | 注意点儿 别把基情当贬义词来用 |
| [18:05] | Booyah, good person. | 哎呀 做个好人 |
| [18:08] | Gentlemen, take this man | 先生们 将这个人 |
| [18:10] | to the infinite labyrinth of eternal ice. | 带到永恒坚冰迷宫 |
| [18:12] | – Yes! – No! | -好 -不 |
| [18:14] | No, take him to the police. | 不 带他去警局 |
| [18:18] | He murdered someone. Take him to jail. | 他杀人了 送他去坐牢 |
| [18:22] | You guys are weird. | 你们真够诡异的 |
| [18:23] | Jeff, that was great. | 杰夫 说的太好了 |
| [18:25] | You were like a white Blair Underwood. | 你就像白人版的布莱尔·安德伍德 |
| [18:27] | Shirley, if you’re willing, I think | 雪瑞 如果你也愿意 我觉得 |
| [18:28] | we should let Jeff sign the sandwich shop form. | 该让杰夫签署三明治小店的文件 |
| [18:29] | Yeah, you could represent both of us. | 你可以代表我们两个 |
| [18:31] | You know, like our attorney. | 做我们的律师 |
| [18:32] | My god, Pierce! You had your first good idea. | 天哪 皮尔斯 你头一次想出好点子啊 |
| [18:35] | – Thank you. – Britta, I’m so sorry. | -多谢 -布雷塔 对不起 |
| [18:38] | It doesn’t matter, Abed. | 没关系 阿布蒂 |
| [18:39] | I should’ve never played therapist with you. | 我不该在你面前扮心理医生 |
| [18:41] | I’ll change my major just one more time. | 我再换次专业好了 |
| [18:43] | But you can’t. You cured me. | 不行 你治好我了 |
| [18:45] | I mean, I’m not cured. I’m willing to admit | 我没好 但我愿意承认 |
| [18:46] | I definitely need therapy. | 我绝对需要心理医生 |
| [18:47] | You’re the only kind of shrink I could ever trust. | 我只相信你这个心理医生 |
| [18:49] | The kind with as little control over my mind as me. | 你能够像我一样 稍稍掌控我的思想 |
| [18:54] | Mind if I cut in? | 介意我也抱一下吗 |
| [18:55] | Troy! | 特洛伊 |
| [18:58] | You’re back. | 你回来了 |
| [19:00] | Yeah, I made a new rule | 我定了条规矩 |
| [19:02] | that the air conditioning repair school | 空调维修学院 |
| [19:03] | has to act like a regular school. | 必须得跟正常学院一样 |
| [19:05] | I can do that because I’m their messiah. | 我有这权利 因为我是他们的救世主 |
| [19:06] | Cool. I went crazy and I wanted to cut off Jeff’s arm. | 酷 我发疯了 我想切掉杰夫的胳膊 |
| [19:09] | I missed you so much, buddy. | 我好想你 兄弟 |
| [19:15] | So, Jeff, we still best friends? | 杰夫 我们还是好朋友吗 |
| [19:23] | All right. | 好了 |
| [19:24] | Cellular mitosis. What is it? | 细胞有丝分裂 是什么 |
| [20:37] | Hello, everybody. I’m Leonard. | 大家好，我是伦纳德 |
| [20:39] | And I’m here today to review Let’s Potato Chips. | 今天我个大家评测一下“耐吃薯片” |
| [20:44] | $1.79 at Kroger’s. | 花了1块7毛9在克罗格买的 |
| [20:49] | Get this sucker open… | 把这破玩意打开 |
| [20:50] | Ah, there we are. | 哈 搞定 |
| [20:52] | Now, I’ve already had some of these, | 其实我已经尝过了 |
| [20:55] | but let’s see. | 我再尝尝 |
| [20:58] | Mmm! Crispy. Mm-hmm. | 嗯 嘎嘣脆 |
| [21:01] | Salty, not too greasy. | 有点咸 不太油腻 |
| [21:04] | That one’s shaped like a duck. | 我吃出了一个鸭子的形状 |
| [21:06] | Well, I guess that’s definitely a buy. | 好了 我觉得这款产品值得购买 |
| [21:10] | That’s it. | 评测结束 |
| [21:12] | Let’s Potato Chips are good, and they’re a buy. | “耐吃薯片”的确耐吃 |
| [21:16] | LEONARD’S FOOD REVIEW!! | Leonard比Techmessager评测做的好 |