| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:06] | We are so screwed. | 我们完蛋了 |
| [00:07] | How are we gonna memorize all this? | 这么多内容怎么可能全记住 |
| [00:08] | Let’s just go over it again. | 那咱们就再复习一遍 |
| [00:09] | Kingdom, phylum, class– | 界 门 纲 |
| [00:11] | order, family, genus, species. | 目 科 属 种 |
| [00:15] | I use a mnemonic device. | 我用了记忆法 |
| [00:17] | “Kevin, please come over for gay sex.” | “凯文 过来爆个菊”[首字母一致] |
| [00:22] | Why wouldn’t you use “Karen”? | 你为啥不用”凯伦”呢 |
| [00:23] | ’cause it’s gay sex, dummy. | 因为玩的是爆菊啊 傻瓜 |
| [00:25] | So use “Great”. | 那就用”啪啪啪” |
| [00:26] | Now I can’t remember anything. Thanks! | 这下我全都记不住了 我谢你啊 |
| [00:28] | God, why do we always wind up in this position? | 老天爷啊 我们为何老是被逼到这般田地呢 |
| [00:30] | For all the time you spend here, | 我们在这里耗费了这么多时间 |
| [00:31] | you’d think we wouldn’t have to cram so much. | 不该还这么死记硬背对付考试啊 |
| [00:33] | Maybe we never get any work done | 也许是因为我们处得太嗨了 |
| [00:34] | because we have so much fun hanging out together. | 所以我们根本就没好好学过习 |
| [00:36] | Definitely, maybe that’s why. | 绝对的 很可能就是这原因 |
| [00:40] | Ah, the duali-dean of man. | 啊 双面俏院长来也 |
| [00:45] | I’m dressed this way because I have good news and bad news. | 穿成这样是因为我带来了好消息和坏消息 |
| [00:48] | You have got to be kidding me. | 真是刺瞎我的氪金狗眼 |
| [00:50] | The bad news is professor Kane has the flu. | 坏消息是凯恩教授得了流感 |
| [00:53] | The good news is Biology class is canceled… | 好消息是生物课取消了 |
| [00:57] | After you. | 您先请 |
| [00:58] | What a gentleman. | 真是绅士风度 |
| [01:01] | Guys, we don’t have to cram last minute anymore. | 伙计们 咱不用临时抱佛脚啦 |
| [01:04] | Last minute got moved to tomorrow. | 可以到明天再抱了 |
| [01:06] | Three-hour lunch? Three-hour lunch? Three-hour lunch? | 三小时午餐 三小时午餐 三小时午餐 |
| [01:08] | Three hours? | 三个小时 |
| [01:09] | I could watch the first half of three movies. | 我能看完一部半电影了 |
| [01:11] | Ooh, I don’t have to go to the fast food restaurant across the street. | 这样我也不去街对面的快餐店吃了 |
| [01:13] | I can go to the fancy one across town. | 我要去城外的高档餐厅 |
| [01:15] | Their manager wears a tie. | 那里的经理还打领带 |
| [01:15] | If we don’t eat, we can make-believe an whole episode’s | 要是不吃饭 咱就能在幻梦空间 |
| [01:17] | worth of Inspector Spacetime in the Dreamatorium. | 演上整整一集的 《时空探长》 |
| [01:19] | – Word. – Yeah. | -一个字 -好 |
| [01:22] | Maybe we should go to Senor Kevin’s. | 咱也许该去凯文餐厅 |
| [01:24] | Britta, didn’t you want to try that | 布雷塔 你不想尝尝新出的 |
| [01:25] | new cage-free bean burrito? | 散养芸豆玉米烤饼吗 |
| [01:26] | The tortillas are made with micro-financed flour. | 据说面饼是用小额信贷出的面粉做的 |
| [01:29] | Troy, you could drive. | 特洛伊 你可以当司机 |
| [01:30] | You always like that spiral parking ramp. | 你一直都很喜欢那里停车场的螺旋坡道 |
| [01:32] | You just keep turning left, but you end up up! | 只要不停向左拐 就可以直接到上头 |
| [01:34] | I can’t go to Senor Kevin’s. | 我不能去凯文餐厅 |
| [01:35] | The manager and I are enemies. | 我跟那经理是仇家 |
| [01:36] | He said Die Hard was bad. | 他说《虎胆龙威》不好看 |
| [01:37] | – He said Die Hard was bad. – I know, buddy. | -他说《虎胆龙威》不好看 -我懂的 |
| [01:39] | Well, how about this. | 那 要不这样 |
| [01:40] | This lunch is already a runaway train, no point in stopping it. | 反正这顿午餐行程已定 没得回头 |
| [01:43] | Troy, Britta, you go to Senor Kevin’s. | 特洛伊 布雷塔 你们去凯文餐厅 |
| [01:46] | Abed promised he’d show me how the Dreamatorium works. | 阿布蒂之前答应给我介绍幻梦空间 |
| [01:48] | – Today’s the perfect day for it. – But I want to– | -今天不去更待何时 -可我想… |
| [01:49] | Abed, don’t you think today’s the perfect day for it? | 阿布蒂 你不觉得今天去正好合适吗 |
| [01:52] | No. | 不觉得 |
| [01:53] | – Abed. – Is this a social cue? | -阿布蒂 -这算是社交暗示吗 |
| [01:56] | I left my puttin’ on the ritz cane in here earlier. | 我的炫舞手杖落这儿了 |
| [02:00] | I know it probably has another name, | 我知道也许这另有名字 |
| [02:02] | but, um, can I be perfectly honest with you guys? | 不过嘛 我能跟你们坦诚相告吗 |
| [02:05] | I think I went too far with this one. | 我觉得我这次玩得有点过火了 |
| [02:08] | I have to go to the bank today. | 我今天还得去银行啊 |
| [02:11] | What am I supposed to tell people in line? | 我该怎么给排队的人们说什么呢 |
| [02:13] | “I had good news and bad news”? | 有个好消息和一个坏消息 |
| [02:17] | Come on, Craig. | 算了 克拉格 |
| [02:18] | Get you life together. | 好好过日子吧 |
| [02:53] | I am Inspector Spacetime. | 我是时空探长 |
| [02:55] | And I know that which is unknown. | 我通晓所有的未知 |
| [02:58] | Duty-bound to protect a universe of innocent unremarkables, | 义不容辞保护这无辜而平凡的宇宙 |
| [03:01] | I patrol it in the x7 dimensionizer | 我和我忠实的助手雷吉 |
| [03:04] | with my loyal constable, Reggie. | 负责七维空间的巡逻守护 |
| [03:06] | This week, however, Reggie has been forced to go to lunch. | 然而这周 雷吉被迫去吃午餐了 |
| [03:09] | So I’m aboard the much crappier H.M.S. Spacetime 12, | 因此在最烂的季节 我和临时助手吉内瓦 |
| [03:12] | from the worst season ever, with temporary constable, Geneva. | 一起登上了烂到家的时空飞船12号 |
| [03:17] | Geneva, I need the quantum spanner, the big one. | 吉内瓦 我需要量子扳手 大号的 |
| [03:20] | Oi, Gov’ner, quantum spammer, up an’ at ’em, in’it? | 嗷 长官 量子扳手 妥妥的 |
| [03:26] | If we can’t get out of orbital lock, | 如果我们不能弄开这轨道锁 |
| [03:28] | The Blorgons may intercept. | 河蟹战警便会拦截到我们 |
| [03:30] | Tut tut, M’lord. | 啧啧啧 长官 |
| [03:31] | Wouldn’t give a tuppence for that sticky wicket. | 区区小事何惧之有 |
| [03:35] | Okay, stop simulation. | 行了 暂停模拟 |
| [03:37] | More British? | 再多点英国口音? |
| [03:38] | I can’t do this anymore. | 我演不下去了 |
| [03:40] | But the Blo-gons might intercept– | 可红鞋战警可能会拦截… |
| [03:42] | It’s Blorgons with an “R”. | 是河蟹战警 |
| [03:43] | Blo-gon means “Thank you” in Blorgon. | 红鞋在河蟹战警里是谢谢的意思 |
| [03:45] | Can’t we play something I know about | 就不能玩些我熟悉的 |
| [03:46] | Like Hospital Administration? | 比如医院管理 |
| [03:51] | You’re mad at me for playing matchmaker with Troy and Britta. | 你是生气我替特洛伊和布雷塔牵线 |
| [03:54] | You think you’re gonna lose Troy. | 你觉得会失去特洛伊 |
| [03:56] | I’m not petty, Annie. | 我没那么小气 安妮 |
| [03:57] | I’m mad at you because you tampered | 我生气是因为你肆意篡改 |
| [03:58] | with the fabric of the group. | 学习小组的结构 |
| [03:59] | How do you know Troy and Britta pairing up | 你怎么确定特洛伊和布雷塔成为一对 |
| [04:00] | wouldn’t destroy everything? | 不会全盘尽毁呢 |
| [04:02] | I run the scenarios. | 我预演过这个场景 |
| [04:02] | I examine this stuff from every conceivable angle. | 我从各种可能性的角度演算过 |
| [04:04] | Oh, and you can do that but I can’t? | 就你能掐会算 我就不行吗 |
| [04:07] | You don’t have a patent on being a control freak, Abed. | 控制狂又不是你的专利 阿布蒂 |
| [04:09] | I kind of do. | 就是我专利 |
| [04:10] | You think this is just a room where Troy and I play Dinosaurs | 你以为这里只是我跟特洛伊玩恐龙 |
| [04:12] | Versus riverboat gamblers together? | 大战游轮赌徒的房间吗 |
| [04:14] | Sure, it’s how I got the construction approved, | 当然 我凭此获得了改建许可 |
| [04:15] | but, much like myself, | 但正如我自己一样 |
| [04:16] | the Dreamatorium has higher functions. | 幻梦空间有着更高级牛逼的功能 |
| [04:19] | Would you like me to show you how your stunt | 想让我演示一下 在你乱点鸳鸯谱后 |
| [04:20] | with Troy and Britta will play itself out? | 特洛伊和布雷塔的结局如何 |
| [04:22] | Why not? | 干吗不呢 |
| [04:23] | Execute simulation Troy/Britta. | 执行模拟特洛伊/布雷塔 |
| [04:25] | Render environment Senor Kevin’s. | 渲染环境 凯文餐厅 |
| [04:29] | oh, those appetizers were dope and legit! | 这些开胃小点太美味了 |
| [04:33] | I don’t usually support lunch | 我通常不支持午餐 |
| [04:34] | because it’s unfair to breakfast. | 因为这对早餐太不公平了 |
| [04:37] | I never thought about meals fighting each other. | 我从没想过三餐还能互相掐架 |
| [04:41] | I guess that explains why you never | 我想这就是我们从没见过 |
| [04:43] | see any two of them on the same table. | 早餐午餐出现在同一张餐桌上的原因 |
| [04:45] | So I guess Annie’s pretty hot to get us together. | 我觉得安妮还挺热心撺掇我们俩一起 |
| [04:47] | She probably just doesn’t understand people. | 她可能只是不了解人心 |
| [04:50] | Well, the sooner the food comes, | 菜上得越快 |
| [04:51] | The sooner this will be over. | 这事结束得越早 |
| [04:54] | I’m afraid your food won’t be ready for another half hour. | 恐怕您点的菜还要有半小时才能上桌 |
| [04:57] | I’m too busy misunderstanding the whole point of Die Hard. | 我正忙着努力理解《虎胆威龙》的主旨 |
| [05:02] | I can’t wait to get home to Abed. | 我迫不及待地想回家找阿布蒂 |
| [05:05] | So you can dart back and forth | 你不就是会来来回回地 |
| [05:06] | doing impressions of your friends. | 模拟你朋友的样子嘛 |
| [05:08] | There’s no science at work here. | 这里又没什么科学原理 |
| [05:10] | You’re right. | 说得对 |
| [05:13] | The science is at work in here. | 科学原理在这儿运行呢 |
| [05:18] | This is the Dreamatorium’s engine. | 这是幻梦空间的引擎 |
| [05:21] | My thoughts are collected by this box | 我的思想被收集在这个盒子里 |
| [05:22] | And everything I know about my friends is stored here. | 我所知道有关我朋友的一切都储存在这里 |
| [05:24] | Both are distilled by logic | 两用逻辑蒸馏 |
| [05:25] | and then recombined into objective observation. | 并调配成客观观察 |
| [05:28] | I’m able to simulate any of the study group | 由此我可以模拟学习小组任何一个成员 |
| [05:29] | And even a half-accurate Chang in over 7,000 unique situations. | 甚至包括7000种特殊场景下的半真昌 |
| [05:33] | Abed, it’s cardboard tubes and a funnel. | 阿布蒂 这就是纸板做的管道和漏斗 |
| [05:36] | Well you see it that way because it’s calibrated | 只有脑力达标的人才能看到本质 |
| [05:37] | to a specific level of brain function. | 所以你只能看到表象 |
| [05:39] | Right. I’m stupid. | 对 我就是蠢 |
| [05:41] | Not stupid, just less able to see what I see. | 不是蠢 就是没我看得深远 |
| [05:44] | Gee, you’ve got it all figured out. | 就你最明白 |
| [05:49] | King of toilet paper rolls over here. | 你可真成了厕纸之王了 |
| [05:53] | Hey, Troy, I’m glad you called. | 特洛伊 真高兴你打来电话 |
| [05:55] | Your lunch is going well, right? | 饭吃得还好吧 |
| [05:56] | Yeah, just checking on Abed. | 还好 我就问问阿布蒂的情况 |
| [05:58] | Making sure he’s okay. | 他还好吧 |
| [06:00] | What? He’s fine. | 什么 他挺好的 |
| [06:03] | He just implied I operate on a lower level | 就是拐弯抹角地说我脑力不足 |
| [06:04] | of brain function, so business as usual. | 表现不力之类的 跟平时一样 |
| [06:07] | Great, um, just, you know, make sure he stays comfortable. | 好吧 你好好照顾他 |
| [06:11] | I worry about him when I’m not around. | 我不在就怕他出状况 |
| [06:13] | Well, he’s fine, he always will be. | 他挺好 他能不好吗 |
| [06:16] | People bend over backwards to cater to him. | 谁都得对他卑躬屈膝 |
| [06:18] | He’s just extra sensitive in the Dreamatorium. | 他把幻梦空间看得很重 |
| [06:21] | It takes a lot out of him to run that thing. | 费了他不少心思 |
| [06:23] | I don’t want you to break his brain. | 你可别把他搞崩坏了 |
| [06:25] | Bye, Troy. | 挂了 特洛伊 |
| [06:27] | How is he? | 他怎么样 |
| [06:28] | He’ll be okay. | 没事 |
| [06:29] | It’s so sweet how much you care about him. | 你这么关心他 真是贴心 |
| [06:32] | And another thing I hate about Die Hard, | 我又想起《虎胆龙威》一个槽点 |
| [06:34] | Two FBI agents named Johnson | 居然俩FBI探员都叫约翰逊 |
| [06:39] | I’ve been thinking about our Inspector Spacetime scenario. | 关于《时空探长》的演绎 我想了下 |
| [06:41] | It might work better if instead of playing Geneva, | 要是你不演吉内瓦 而是演罗莎蒙德 |
| [06:43] | you played Rosamund. | 说不定就能行 |
| [06:46] | and she only had three lines. | 而且只有三句台词 |
| [06:48] | I have a better idea. | 我有更好的主意 |
| [06:50] | You know what would make your scenarios a lot more realistic? | 你知道怎么能让戏更贴近生活吗 |
| [06:52] | If Troy weren’t on a date. | 特洛伊没出去约会就好了 |
| [06:53] | Why don’t you take all your thoughts | 你可以保留你所有的想法和逻辑 |
| [06:55] | and your logic and add one step to the process. | 不过要加上一个步骤 |
| [06:58] | – What are you doing? – From now on, | -你干嘛 -从现在起 |
| [06:59] | before you do or say anything, | 不管你打算说什么做什么 |
| [07:01] | you’re gonna think about how it affects the people around you. | 都要先考虑对周围人可能造成的影响 |
| [07:04] | We lower functioning brains call this “Empathy”. | 我们这种脑力不足的人称之为”体恤他人” |
| [07:11] | Abed? | 阿布蒂 |
| [07:14] | Abed? | 阿布蒂 |
| [07:17] | Oh, my god, I broke Abed. | 完了 阿布蒂被我搞崩坏了 |
| [07:23] | Abed? | 阿布蒂 |
| [07:24] | You know how you wanted me to tell you | 还记得吗 你以前求过我 |
| [07:25] | when you were being scary weird | 一旦你不再怪得可爱而是怪得吓人 |
| [07:27] | instead of cute weird? | 就要提醒你 |
| [07:28] | This is scary weird. | 这就算是怪得吓人了 |
| [07:34] | Hello, Annie. | 你好 安妮 |
| [07:37] | What was I doing on the floor? | 我刚才怎么躺在地上了 |
| [07:39] | Were we…Doing it? | 我们在…啪啪啪吗 |
| [07:41] | Are you being Jeff? | 你在学杰夫吗 |
| [07:43] | Well, I’m not being a Kardashian. | 反正我没在学卡戴珊 |
| [07:46] | So where are we now? | 现在场景是哪里 |
| [07:47] | We’re in the doctor’s lounge of Greendale hospital school. | 格林德尔医学院 医生休息室 |
| [07:50] | Hospital school? | 医学院 |
| [07:52] | It’s a sexy emotional school | 是一所性感暧昧的学校 |
| [07:53] | where doctors save lives and make love, | 医生在此妙手回春 颠鸾倒凤 |
| [07:55] | Often simultaneously. | 通常二者兼顾哦 |
| [07:57] | Our stories, ripped from the headlines. | 我们的故事 占据头条 |
| [07:59] | Our passions, unbridled. | 我们的激情 恣意放纵 |
| [08:00] | Our cafeteria, eh… | 我们的咖啡厅 |
| [08:03] | Make love to me, Ann. | 献身于我吧 安 |
| [08:05] | I know I’m just a surgeon | 我知道我只是个外科医生 |
| [08:06] | and you’re a hotshot upstart administrator, | 而你是正处事业上升期的院长 |
| [08:08] | But damn the rules, damn the system, | 可去他的狗屁规定 狗血体制完蛋去 |
| [08:10] | damn our two foot height disparity, | 你我之间两英尺的身高差也见鬼去 |
| [08:12] | I want you. | 我想要你 |
| [08:13] | Okay, Abed, I get it, | 行了 阿布蒂 懂你意思了 |
| [08:14] | we have different sensibilities. | 咱俩对体恤的定义不一样 |
| [08:16] | Later. | 回见 |
| [08:21] | Bye. | 再见 |
| [08:22] | I’m leaving. | 我走了 |
| [08:33] | Okay, Dr. Jeff, | 好吧 杰夫医生 |
| [08:36] | Can you please tell me where I can find Abed? | 请问你知道阿布蒂在哪吗 |
| [08:38] | I owe him an apology. | 我要向他道歉 |
| [08:41] | Abed? Never heard of him. | 阿布蒂 没听说过 |
| [08:43] | Terrific. | 好嘛 |
| [08:47] | I asked you a question, doctor. | 我问你问题呢 医生 |
| [08:48] | I’m a surgeon! | 我是外科医生 |
| [08:49] | And I’m your administrator! | 我是你的院长 |
| [08:51] | I left my wife for you and she was pregnant! | 我为了你抛弃发妻 她当时还怀着孕呢 |
| [08:53] | Who do you think inseminated her? | 又是谁叫她怀上的 |
| [08:55] | Now tell me what I want to know or god as my witness, | 立即回答我的问题 否则黄天在上 |
| [08:57] | I’ll have your stethoscope. | 姐立即没收你的听诊器 |
| [08:59] | Fine. | 算你狠 |
| [09:00] | Dr. Perry might know. | 派利医生可能知道 |
| [09:03] | Render environment bio lab. | 环境渲染 生物实验室 |
| [09:08] | Look, there’s Britta and Troy fooling around with each other. | 看那 布雷塔和特洛伊正在瞎搞呢 |
| [09:11] | Look, there’s Abed having overcome his issues. | 看那 阿布蒂已经恢复了 |
| [09:14] | Nice try. | 没用啦 |
| [09:15] | Dr. Barnes, Dr. Perry. | 巴恩斯医生 派利医生 |
| [09:18] | We just saved an uninsured homeless man’s life. | 我们刚挽救了一名流浪汉的生命 |
| [09:22] | Using an unapproved procedure. | 采用了一种未获批准的手术 |
| [09:24] | Now, we’re going to kiss. | 现在我们要接吻了 |
| [09:33] | This is what you think I want? | 你以为我是来看这个的吗 |
| [09:34] | What do you want, administrator? | 那你想看什么 院长大人 |
| [09:36] | I want to talk to Abed. | 我想跟阿布蒂说话 |
| [09:38] | There’s no one here by that name | 这里没这个人 |
| [09:39] | – You’re lying. – Maybe I am, so what? | -你说谎 -也许吧 你又能怎样 |
| [09:42] | I was raised on the mean streets of harlem. | 我可是黑人区里混大的 |
| [09:44] | I’m not scared of you. | 才不怕你 |
| [09:45] | Well, be scared of this. | 那你瞧好吧 |
| [09:50] | Sodium pentothal, known commonly as truth serum. | 硫喷妥钠 俗称吐真剂 |
| [09:56] | I saw Abed’s name in the hospital school files, | 我在医学院档案里见过阿布蒂的名字 |
| [10:00] | I love butt stuff, I hate spiders, | 我有恋臀癖 讨厌蜘蛛 |
| [10:02] | I stole a pen from the bank, | 从银行偷过一支笔 |
| [10:03] | I cried during About A Boy… The soundtrack… | 看《单亲插班生》时我痛哭流涕 那配乐 |
| [10:07] | I don’t wash my hands before surgery. | 我做手术前不洗手 |
| [10:09] | I can see why women find Clive Owen attractive to the point | 我知道克里夫·欧文让女人着迷的原因 |
| [10:12] | where I might just as well be attracted to him. | 我也因为同样的原因迷恋他 |
| [10:14] | I use comparisons to Hitler to win arguments on the internet | 为了在网上掐架获胜 我动不动就拿出 |
| [10:16] | at the drop of a hat. | 希特勒做比喻 |
| [10:18] | I know nothing about wine. | 我对酒一窍不通 |
| [10:20] | I’m more turned on by women in pajamas than lingerie. | 穿睡衣的女性比穿内衣的更让我性致勃勃 |
| [10:22] | I just want to know they feel comfortable. | 我只想让她们穿得舒适而已 |
| [10:24] | I didn’t get Inception. | 我没看懂《盗梦空间》 |
| [10:28] | I didn’t get Inception. | 我没看懂《盗梦空间》 |
| [10:34] | You said you saw his name in the files. | 你说在档案里看到过他的名字 |
| [10:35] | There’s so many layers. | 好多页呢 |
| [10:37] | Right, render environment medical study room. | 对 环境渲染 医学院自习室 |
| [10:41] | There’s head nurse, Shirley, | 护士长雪瑞 |
| [10:42] | talking to tragic, heart-wrenching alzheimer’s Patient | 正在跟悲痛欲绝的老年痴呆病患 |
| [10:45] | and emmy-contender, Pierce Hawthorne. | 兼艾美奖提名者皮尔斯·霍桑说话 |
| [10:48] | Mr. Hawthorne, you’re out of your bed again. | 霍桑先生 你又下床了 |
| [10:51] | ‘Cause I think I’m on a train. | 我以为在火车上呢 |
| [10:54] | Shirley, get me the file on Abed. | 雪瑞 帮我把阿布蒂的档案找出来 |
| [10:56] | Abed doesn e exist, young lady. | 没有这个人 姑娘 |
| [10:58] | He exists if I say so. | 我说有就有 |
| [10:59] | This is my hospital school. | 这是我开的医学院 |
| [11:01] | Your hospital school, young lady, is a simulation | 姑娘 你的医学院只是仿真模拟 |
| [11:03] | being run through a filter of other people’s needs. | 并且都要通过一个”他人需求”过滤器生成 |
| [11:05] | Abed’s been filtered out because nobody needs him. | 阿布蒂被过滤掉了 因为没人需要他 |
| [11:08] | I need him. | 我就需要 |
| [11:09] | Well you’re not simulated. | 可惜你不是幻境中人 |
| [11:10] | No, but this is! | 好吧 但这下就不同了 |
| [11:14] | And there are more where that didn’t come from. | 老娘还有更厉害的招还没使出来呢 |
| [11:16] | This is a private compartment. | 这里是私人隔间 |
| [11:17] | Jeff, get the files. | 杰夫 去拿档案 |
| [11:19] | Why me? | 为什么让我去 |
| [11:20] | Because you can see the cabinets. | 因为你能找到档案柜 |
| [11:23] | And I’ll make love to you. | 事成之后我将以身相许 |
| [11:24] | Jackpot. | 爽爆了 |
| [11:29] | There is an Abed in this hospital school, | 医学院里倒有个叫阿布蒂的 |
| [11:32] | but he’s not a doctor. | 但他不是医生 |
| [11:35] | He’s a patient. | 他是个病人 |
| [11:36] | – Notify security! – Conductor! | -保安 -快来人 |
| [11:38] | Jeff, take me to that Abed. | 杰夫 带我去找那个阿布蒂 |
| [11:40] | Where is that? | 他在哪呢 |
| [11:41] | Enough games, just take me where I wanna go. | 我玩够了 就带我去我想去的地方吧 |
| [11:44] | Follow me. | 跟我来 |
| [11:47] | Are we close? | 快到了吗 |
| [11:47] | Almost there, although you should probably run in place | 近在咫尺了 不过你应该跑起来 |
| [11:50] | and let the hall way move around you. | 让路自己在你脚下飞驰 |
| [11:59] | Here we are. | 咱们到了 |
| [12:00] | Where? | 到哪儿了 |
| [12:01] | Where you wanted to go. | 到你想去的地方了 |
| [12:02] | The last night of school, first year. | 第一学年放假前的最后一夜 |
| [12:05] | The night we kissed. | 咱俩激情热吻的那一晚 |
| [12:07] | Abed wasn’t there, so whose memory is this? | 阿布蒂当时可没在场 这是谁的记忆 |
| [12:10] | Maybe it’s yours. | 可能是你的 |
| [12:12] | Maybe the Dreamatorium really works. | 或许幻梦空间真的有效 |
| [12:14] | Or maybe Leonard was watching from the bushes | 又或者是伦纳德躲在草丛中偷窥到了 |
| [12:16] | and told Abed about it. | 然后告诉了阿布蒂 |
| [12:19] | I don’t have cable. | 我可没有告密 |
| [12:21] | Knock it off, Abed. | 少来这套 阿布蒂 |
| [12:22] | I’m not Abed. | 我不是阿布蒂 |
| [12:23] | You’re confused, and so was I. | 你有点困惑 我曾经也是如此 |
| [12:26] | But not any more. | 但我已不再迷惘 |
| [12:28] | Jeff–Abed stop. | 杰夫…阿布蒂 别闹了 |
| [12:30] | I don’t want to do this. | 我不想再陪你胡闹了 |
| [12:31] | I want to talk to ABed. | 我想跟阿布蒂谈谈 |
| [12:36] | I’m taking the file. | 我拿着档案呢 |
| [12:39] | Oh, it says Abed isn’t the recovery parlor. | 看起来阿布蒂可不是个回收站 |
| [12:43] | Condition–never better. | 身体状况 好得不能再好了 |
| [12:45] | You’re not holding anything. | 你手上空无一物 |
| [12:49] | This is the file. | 档案在这 |
| [12:51] | Abed Nadir, psychiatric patient 1373, | 阿布蒂·纳德尔 1373号精神病人 |
| [12:55] | Control freak with no empathy. | 毫无同理心的控制狂 |
| [12:57] | People bend over backwards to cater to him. | 大家不得不尽力去迎合他 |
| [13:00] | Signed, Healthcare Administrator Annie Edison. | 签名 医院院长安妮·埃迪生 |
| [13:06] | That’s out of context. | 你这是断章取义 |
| [13:09] | You’ve thought of everything, Annie. | 你操心得太多了 安妮 |
| [13:10] | With Abed gone and Troy and Britta together, | 阿布蒂消失了 特洛伊和布雷塔好上了 |
| [13:13] | there’s nothing standing in the way of us. | 再没有什么能妨碍咱俩了 |
| [13:15] | Wait, what? | 等等 你说啥 |
| [13:16] | Come on. | 来吧 |
| [13:17] | This is you dream. | 这是你梦寐以求的 |
| [13:19] | This is why you played matchmaker. | 你是因此才扮演红娘的角色 |
| [13:21] | This is what’s important to you. | 这才是你在意的事情 |
| [13:25] | You are not Jeff. | 你又不是杰夫 |
| [13:27] | Because Jeff cares about Abed. | 因为杰夫关心阿布蒂 |
| [13:29] | And I did not push Troy and Britta together | 我撮合特洛伊和布雷塔才不是因为 |
| [13:31] | so this would happen. | 我想咱俩能成呢 |
| [13:32] | I did it because I thought they were cute together | 只是因为我觉得他俩很般配 |
| [13:34] | and this would have been a bonus. | 当然咱俩能圆满就算锦上添花了 |
| [13:36] | And we are not here. | 但是我们不在这个场景中 |
| [13:38] | And I’m not staying here because I hate whoever you are. | 不管你是谁 我讨厌你 我要走了 |
| [13:42] | You should probably storm off in– | 你横冲直撞的时候记得注意… |
| [13:45] | in place. | 墙 |
| [13:56] | Where do you wanna go next? | 你接下来想去哪儿 |
| [13:57] | I wanna be alone. | 我想一个人待会 |
| [13:59] | Sounds good to me. | 听起来挺好的 |
| [14:01] | Execute simulation, Annie/Annie. | 执行模拟 安妮与安妮 |
| [14:07] | There. | 搞定 |
| [14:08] | Now we’re alone. | 现在就剩咱自己了 |
| [14:10] | Great, so you’re me now. | 好嘛 现在你又开始扮我了 |
| [14:12] | Why are you blowing our magic moment with Jeff? | 你为什么要破坏我们跟杰夫的美妙时光呢 |
| [14:14] | It’s not magic. | 一点也不美妙 |
| [14:15] | It’s not even real. | 压根都不是真的 |
| [14:17] | But we love Jeff. | 不过我们确实爱杰夫 |
| [14:20] | No, we don’t. | 不 才没有 |
| [14:22] | We’re just in love with the idea of being loved. | 我们只是爱着那种被人爱的感觉 |
| [14:25] | And if we can teach a guy like Jeff to do it, | 如果能教会像杰夫那样的家伙来爱我们 |
| [14:27] | we’ll never be unloved. | 就再也不用担心没人爱我们了 |
| [14:28] | So we keep running the same scenario over and over | 我们可以一遍遍运行相同的场景 |
| [14:32] | hoping for a different result. | 期盼一个不一样的结局 |
| [14:33] | Running scenarios. | 运行场景 |
| [14:35] | Careful now. | 注意点 |
| [14:36] | You’re starting to sound like Abed. | 你现在说话的口吻有点像阿布蒂了 |
| [14:40] | So…I probably shouldn’t say things like “Star Wars. | 也就是说…我不能说”星球大战 |
| [14:43] | Zardoz, Cougar Town, cool, cool, cool.” | 萨杜斯 熟女镇 酷酷酷”之类的咯 |
| [14:46] | – Stop it. – Pop culture, pop culture. | -别闹了 -流行文化 流行文化 |
| [14:47] | – I’m on a TV show. – You’re gonna get in trouble. | -我上电视了 -你会有麻烦的 |
| [14:50] | Meta, meta. | 变形成功 |
| [14:52] | It’s Abed! | 阿布蒂 |
| [14:53] | I got an Abed here! | 阿布蒂出现了 |
| [14:55] | Get him! | 把他抓起来 |
| [14:56] | That’s it. | 正是如此 |
| [14:57] | I find you guilty of being Abed. | 我发现你愧于做阿布蒂 |
| [14:59] | You’re under arrest! | 你被逮捕了 |
| [15:00] | Can I just interject and say | 我能插嘴问下 |
| [15:01] | I don’t know what the hell’s going on? | 到底怎么回事么 |
| [15:11] | This time you’ll never get out. | 这次你可永远跑不了了 |
| [15:14] | Abed? | 阿布蒂吗 |
| [15:18] | Abed. | 阿布蒂 |
| [15:19] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [15:20] | I found you by turning into you, how cool is that? | 我通过变成你找到了你 我聪明吧 |
| [15:22] | Cool. Cool, cool, cool. | 酷 酷酷酷 |
| [15:23] | Tell me where we are so I can pretend to see it. | 告诉我咱们现在在哪 我好入戏 |
| [15:26] | We’re inside a locker. | 咱们被锁在一个储物柜里了 |
| [15:26] | It’s where I spent a lot of time in junior high. | 我初中大部分时间都是在这度过的 |
| [15:30] | You think this is where we’d put you? | 你觉得是我们会把你逼成这样 |
| [15:31] | You know that’s absurd, right? | 你明白这有多荒谬对吧 |
| [15:33] | Well, I’m not stupid. | 好吧 我又不傻 |
| [15:34] | You can see I’ve increased the square footage. | 你看 我把内部空间扩大了 |
| [15:36] | It’s a metaphorical locker. | 这个储物柜是一个暗喻 |
| [15:38] | It’s a place where people like me get put | 像我这样的人 |
| [15:39] | when everyone’s finally fed up with us. | 被大家厌恶了之后就会被关进这里 |
| [15:41] | Abed, so maudlin. | 阿布蒂 你太敏感了 |
| [15:44] | If you start turning into a vampire– | 如果你变成吸血鬼… |
| [15:45] | I’ve run the simulations, Annie. | 我已经模拟过了 安妮 |
| [15:46] | I don’t get married, I don’t invent a billion dollar website | 我没有婚配 也没创建价值数亿的网站 |
| [15:48] | that helps people have sex. | 方便广大网友约炮 |
| [15:49] | I don’t make in into Sundance, | 在圣丹斯和斯兰丹斯电影节里 |
| [15:50] | Slamdance or dance pants. | 我籍籍无名 舞裤也没我的份 |
| [15:52] | Troy invents dance pants in 2019. | 特洛伊在2019年发明了舞蹈裤 |
| [15:53] | Don’t tell him, he needs to stumble onto it. | 别告诉他 这事他得靠猿粪 |
| [15:55] | All right, listen. | 好吧 听着 |
| [15:57] | The scenarios you run in here are like | 你这儿上演的故事就像是 |
| [15:59] | great… science fiction. | 一部伟大的科幻小说 |
| [16:01] | They’re impressive and detailed and insightful, | 令人难忘 详叙其事 立意深远 |
| [16:05] | but they’re not accurate for crap. | 但它并非现实 |
| [16:07] | Science fiction never has been. | 科幻小说都是虚构的 |
| [16:09] | Look at 2001. | 就像2001太空漫游 |
| [16:11] | Did we have a Space Odyssey? | 难道我们真有奥德赛太空吗 |
| [16:12] | No, we got snowboarding in the Olympics | 没有 我们只有冬奥会单板滑雪比赛 |
| [16:14] | and we over-validated Carson Daly. | 以及被吹上天的卡森·戴利 |
| [16:16] | – That poor guy. – Yeah, cry me a river. | -可怜的人 -对 我都泪流满面了 |
| [16:18] | My point is, your simulations are nothing more than anxieties. | 我是想说 你模拟这些场景只能带来焦虑 |
| [16:22] | You’re afraid you don’t fit in. | 你担心自己不合群 |
| [16:23] | You’re afraid you’ll be alone. | 担心自己会落单 |
| [16:25] | Great news–you share that with all of us, | 好消息是 你愿把这些想法与我们分享 |
| [16:28] | so you’ll never be alone and you’ll always fit in. | 所以你绝对不会是孤单一人 |
| [16:32] | And, yes, that’s why I meddled with Troy and Britta. | 没错 所以我才撮合特洛伊和布雷塔 |
| [16:35] | You caught me. | 你猜对了 |
| [16:36] | I was trying to make life go according to some script. | 我本想让生活按某种规划进行 |
| [16:39] | I can’t. | 我做不到 |
| [16:40] | You can’t. | 你也做不到 |
| [16:42] | We both need to get more comfortable winging it. | 面对生活 我们要学会随机应变 |
| [16:45] | At least it’ll be less work. | 这样会轻松许多 |
| [16:47] | It would cut down my Dreamatorium time by 18 hours a week. | 我以后每周只在幻梦空间中待18小时 |
| [16:49] | I could take up yoga. | 我也可以练瑜伽 |
| [16:50] | You’ve got the body type. | 你身材很适合瑜伽 |
| [16:52] | Now let’s get you out of here. | 我们想办法把你弄出去吧 |
| [16:54] | I don’t know how. | 我不知该怎么办 |
| [16:55] | These fake shackles don’t have a fake key. | 这些幻梦手铐可没有匹配的钥匙 |
| [16:56] | Isn’t that what a… quantum spanner’s for? | 所以量子扳手就派上用场了 |
| [17:00] | Technically, no. | 理论上说 不对 |
| [17:03] | But that’s fine. | 但就这样吧 |
| [17:11] | So should we get back to lunch? | 一起回去吃午饭吧 |
| [17:13] | I guess so. | 好的 |
| [17:14] | A little more anticlimactic than I would have simulated it, | 不过这次环境模拟有点虎头蛇尾 |
| [17:15] | – But whatever. – Anticlimactic? | -就这样吧 -虎头蛇尾 |
| [17:18] | Render environment observo-deck, | 渲染环境 飞船操控中心 |
| [17:20] | H.M.S. spacetime 12. | 时空飞船12号 |
| [17:25] | Inspector, set the tachyon drive to hyperjump. | 探长 激活超光速加速器准备时空跳跃 |
| [17:28] | We must get to the other side of this star field | 我们要在河蟹战警追上前 |
| [17:30] | before the Blorgons intercept. | 抵达星空的另一端 |
| [17:33] | Blorgons in this sector? | 这片区域的河蟹战警吗 |
| [17:35] | Well, this mission has gone pear-shaped, indeed. | 这次行动已经完全失控了 |
| [17:38] | Prepare to hyperjump on my mark. | 听我命令 准备时空跳跃 |
| [17:41] | Bugger the dovecoats, inspector. | 探长 穿铁皮的河蟹战警来了 |
| [17:42] | We’re too late! Blorgons! | 我们慢了一步 河蟹来了 |
| [17:45] | Eradicate! Eradicate! | 斩草除根 斩草除根 |
| [17:48] | Our quantum blasters are useless against their armor. | 量子波打不透他们的盔甲 |
| [17:50] | We’re as cooked as Lord Nelson’s mutton, we are. | 我们这下死定了 万劫不复了 |
| [17:53] | Not if I can help it. | 我要出马解决这一切 |
| [17:54] | I’ll see you on the other side inspector…wherever that is. | 在星空的另一端见 探长 不论何地 |
| [17:58] | Don’t you mean “Whenever that is”? | 你是不是想说”不论何时” |
| [18:05] | Take that, Blorgon scum! | 尝尝这个 河蟹渣渣 |
| [18:07] | You’ll blo-gon me for this later. | 瞧我把你河蟹个精光 |
| [18:10] | Ow, Annie! | 安妮 |
| [18:12] | Oh, oh, my God! | 我的天呐 |
| [18:13] | Abed, I’m so sorry. | 阿布蒂 太对不起了 |
| [18:15] | No, no, you’re committing. | 没 你很是投入 |
| [18:17] | This is good stuff. | 干得不错 |
| [18:18] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [18:21] | I am Abed Nadir… | 我是阿布蒂·纳德尔 |
| [18:23] | And I don’t know a lot of things everyone else knows. | 大家都通晓的东西很多我都一无所知 |
| [18:25] | I wander the universe with my friend, Troy, | 我与伙伴特洛伊一同在宇宙中穿行 |
| [18:27] | doing whatever I want. | 随心所欲 |
| [18:29] | Sometimes accidentally hurting innocent unremarkables. | 有时会不小心伤到无辜路人甲乙丙丁 |
| [18:32] | This week, however, Troy went to lunch and I adapted. | 这周特洛伊去吃午饭 我便见机行事 |
| [18:36] | I now have the ability to enter the minds of others. | 现在我有了解读他人思想的能力 |
| [18:39] | – I’m hungry, are you hungry? – Yeah. | -我好饿啊 你饿了吗 -当然了 |
| [18:41] | I’ll make us buttered noodles. | 我去煮点黄油意面 |
| [18:42] | Using an elusive new technique known as “Empathy”. | 用的是”同理心”这一难以捉摸的新招 |
| [18:47] | So was the other fast food place worth the drive, Shirley? | 费那么大工夫开车去那家店值吗 雪瑞 |
| [18:50] | You know, half way there I thought, “What am I doing? | 走到一半我就想”我这是在干吗啊” |
| [18:52] | It’s the same fast food place in a different location. | 只不过换了个地 还是一样的快餐 |
| [18:54] | Have the margins of my life become so narrow?” | 我何时变得如此眼光短浅了 |
| [18:56] | So I went to the mall and had pizza. | 于是我去商场买了块披萨吃 |
| [18:58] | I be the matrix today. | 我今天够波折吧 |
| [18:59] | Sounds like this has been a game-changing day for all of us. | 看来今天对所有人来说都是转折点啊 |
| [19:03] | I almost sat on my balls, | 我差点坐到自己的蛋蛋 |
| [19:04] | but at the last second, I made an adjustment. | 不过最后一秒 我侧了侧身 |
| [19:08] | – Good job! – Good work. | -好样的 -干得好 |
| [19:10] | Good job, man. | 好样的 伙计 |
| [19:11] | Well, we had a good lunch, too. | 我们的午餐也很愉快 |
| [19:13] | Yeah. | 可不嘛 |
| [19:15] | I spoke to the manager about Die Hard, | 我跟餐厅经理就《虎胆龙威》做了交涉 |
| [19:17] | And I told him he should be ashamed of himself. | 我告诉他 他应该为自己感到羞耻 |
| [19:19] | Thanks. | 谢了 |
| [19:20] | Sorry I bailed on the Dreamatorium. | 很抱歉我今天没去幻梦空间 |
| [19:22] | It’s okay, Annie did pretty good in a pinch. | 没关系 我和安妮成功化险为夷 |
| [19:26] | All right, back to cramming? | 好了 继续温书吧 |
| [19:29] | The people at the bank loved my outfit. | 银行那边的人喜欢我这身打扮 |
| [19:32] | And they had all kinds of questions about it | 他们问了各种问题 |
| [19:34] | and my answers seemed to amuse and | 我的回答让他们很开心 |
| [19:37] | –and even liberate them a little. | 甚至是解放了他们的思想 |
| [19:39] | A few of us went to lunch | 我和一些人共进午餐 |
| [19:40] | and I had the deepest conversation of my life. | 我们进行了有生以来最为深刻的谈话 |
| [19:44] | I gotta go, I’m telling everybody. | 伙计们 我得走了 |
| [19:48] | Hmm, maybe after a long, dark night, | 也许漫漫长夜过后 |
| [19:51] | the sun is starting to rise on Greendale. | 太阳终要在格林德尔上方升起了 |
| [19:53] | Maybe. Maybe not. | 也许吧 也许不会 |
| [19:55] | You never can tell what kind of day you’re gonna have. | 你永远无法写定将来的日子 |
| [19:58] | Okay, I didn’t really avoid sitting on them. | 好吧 我其实坐到了蛋上 |
| [20:00] | I…sat right on them. | 直直地坐了上去 |
| [20:02] | – I’m sorry. – Pierce, I’m sorry. | -真可怜 -皮尔斯 我很抱歉 |
| [20:05] | Hurt like hell. | 疼死爹了 |
| [20:06] | I saw eagles. | 我都眼冒金星了 |
| [20:11] | Troy and Abed in the morning | 特洛伊和阿布蒂的早间秀 |
| [20:13] | – Today we’re joined by Annie Edison… – Hi! | -今天我们请到了安妮·埃迪生 -大家好 |
| [20:15] | Who’s gonna show us how to spruce up your apartment on a budget. | 她将教大家如何用最少的钱装饰自己的公寓 |
| [20:17] | So, Annie, what inspired this throw? | 那么 安妮 你这想法是怎么来的 |
| [20:19] | Well, I just thought that I’d cover up the stain | 我是想到了我要清理干净 |
| [20:21] | where Abed spilled code red on the couch last week. | 阿布蒂上周在沙发留下的鲜红点点 |
| [20:24] | Oops. Crafty. | 真机灵啊 |
| [20:25] | And you have some tips on entertaining. | 而且你要在款待客人方面支些招 |
| [20:26] | Yes, if you’re expecting company, | 没错 如果家里有人造访 |
| [20:28] | but you don’t have enough chairs, | 然而椅子却不够 |
| [20:30] | you can bring out pillows from your bedroom | 你可以把卧室里的枕头拿来 |
| [20:32] | and use them on the floor for a Moroccan feel. | 铺在地上坐 很有摩洛哥感觉哦 |
| [20:35] | Ooh, a taste of the orient. | 很有东方风韵 |
| [20:37] | Actually, boys, I have a little surprise for you. | 伙计们 我为你们准备了惊喜 |
| [20:40] | While you two were out playing blazer tag… | 趁你们玩运动枪的时候准备的 |
| [20:42] | That’s laser tag with sport coats. | 那是穿运动服玩激光枪 |
| [20:43] | I did a little extreme bedroom makeover! | 我给卧室来了个大改造 |
| [20:47] | I unbunked your beds and got scrap fabric and– | 我把上下铺拆开了 弄了些布料 |
| [20:53] | It’s okay, buddy. | 伙计 没啥的 |
| [20:53] | We can put it back. | 我们可以恢复回来 |
| [20:54] | We can put it back the way it was. | 可以按原样恢复回来 |
| [20:56] | – I’m so sorry. – It’s okay. | -太抱歉了 -没关系 |
| [20:57] | It’s–cut, Garrett. | 快切掉 加瑞特 |
| [20:59] | Sorry! | 抱歉 |
| [21:03] | 机械故障 正在检修 |