| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:16] | Toilet paper: one of mankind’s crowning achievements. | 厕纸 人类最伟大的发明之一 |
| [00:18] | Without it, we’d have to use leaves | 没有它 我们就只能用叶子 |
| [00:20] | or newspaper or a horse. | 或者报纸 或者马 |
| [00:22] | And no one loves TP more than George and Harold. | 没人比乔治和哈罗德更爱厕纸了 |
| [00:24] | Not for its intended use, but for pranks. | 不是自己用 而是为了恶作剧 |
| [00:33] | – Man, I love TP. – Same. | -我真爱厕纸 -我也是 |
| [00:37] | I’m running out of oxygen! | 我没气了 |
| [00:39] | *So George and Harold make comic books* | *乔治和哈罗德画漫画书* |
| [00:41] | – We’re cool! – Me too! | -我们好着呢 -我也是 |
| [00:42] | *But they had a mean old principal Who told them what to…* | *但是他们有个指手画脚的老校长* |
| [00:45] | *So they got a Hypno-Ring And first they made him dance* | *于是他们做了个催眠戒指先让他跳舞* |
| [00:48] | *Then accidentally* | *然后不小心* |
| [00:49] | *kinda on purpose Turned him into Captain Underpants* | *可能故意把他变成了内裤队长* |
| [00:53] | *With a snap, he’s the Captain Not the brightest man* | *一声响指 他是队长可能不是最聪明的人* |
| [00:56] | *And don’t forget, when he gets wet You’re back where you began* | *别忘了 他一碰水你就得从头开始* |
| [01:00] | *Put it all together What could possibly go wrong* | *开始闹吧能出什么问题呢* |
| [01:03] | *Now, this is the end Of the Captain Underpants song* | *内裤队长之歌到这里就结束啦* |
| [01:06] | *By George Beard and Harold Hutchins* | *由乔治·彼尔德和哈罗德·哈钦森所作* |
| [01:13] | That means “Toilet paper time-out.” | 意思是”厕纸时间到了” |
| [01:15] | While George and Harold | 虽然乔治和哈罗德 |
| [01:16] | had successfully TP’d most items in Piqua, | 已经成功给皮奎大多地方都蒙上了厕纸 |
| [01:18] | they had their eyes on an even bigger prize. | 他们还有更加远大的志向 |
| [01:21] | TPing the entire school is gonna be the greatest prank ever. | 把整个学校都蒙上厕纸应该会是最棒的恶作剧 |
| [01:24] | We’re gonna be legends. | 我们会成为传奇 |
| [01:26] | Good thing we have a TP Teepee. | 还好我们有厕纸帐篷 |
| [01:27] | It’s the best TP-only store that only sells TP. | 这是最棒的只卖厕纸的厕纸店 |
| [01:32] | Sorry, guys. You’re banned. | 抱歉 伙计们 你们不得入内 |
| [01:33] | Banned? For what? | 不得入内 为什么 |
| [01:35] | Too much TPing. | 蒙了太多厕纸 |
| [01:36] | Your principal, Mr. Krupp, sent this over. | 你们的校长 克拉普老师发来的这个 |
| [01:38] | Whoa. Nice poster. | 这传单真不错 |
| [01:40] | – Can we have it? – No. | -能给我们吗 -不行 |
| [01:42] | Great. What are we gonna do now? | 太棒了 我们现在该怎么办 |
| [01:44] | – Don’t worry, buddy, we still got– – No, you don’t. | -别担心 我们还有… -不 没了 |
| [01:46] | Aw, man. | 伙计 |
| [01:49] | – Hey, there, Er… – ica. | -你好 艾 -瑞卡 |
| [01:53] | Erica, you don’t know where we could get, | 艾瑞卡 你知道我们在哪儿能搞到 |
| [01:55] | like, a thousand rolls of toilet paper? | 一千卷厕纸吗 |
| [01:57] | We were on the verge of pulling an epic TP prank. | 我们马上要完成一个传奇厕纸恶作剧 |
| [02:00] | We would’ve been legends. | 我们本来可能成为传奇 |
| [02:02] | Oh, so you’re giving up? Legends don’t give up– | 你们要放弃了 传奇从不会放弃 |
| [02:04] | legends like Horatio Dump. | 霍雷肖·邓普这样的传奇 |
| [02:07] | “Horatio Dump. | “霍雷肖·邓普 |
| [02:08] | He never gave up.” | 他从来不放弃” |
| [02:10] | Long ago, people threw their trash wherever. | 很久以前 人们随地丢垃圾 |
| [02:12] | Then Horatio Dump said, | 然后霍雷肖·邓普说 |
| [02:13] | “Trash belongs in one place, not all over.” | “垃圾只能丢在一个地方 不能乱扔” |
| [02:16] | People hated him for it. | 人们因此讨厌他 |
| [02:18] | But he never gave up. | 但他从来没有放弃 |
| [02:20] | And that’s why the place where trash goes is named– | 所以扔垃圾的地方都叫 |
| [02:22] | The Horatio? | 霍雷肖吗 |
| [02:24] | – The dump. – That’s made up. | -邓普[垃圾场] -这是编的 |
| [02:25] | No, that’s tenacity. | 不 这叫韧性 |
| [02:29] | Cool. What’s tenacity? | 厉害 韧性是什么 |
| [02:32] | Erica? | 艾瑞卡 |
| [02:34] | – She’s like Batman. – Minus the angry mumbling. | -她就像蝙蝠侠 -就是不会愤怒地低语 |
| [02:43] | Mr. Ree, Mr. Ree! | 雷先生 雷先生 |
| [02:45] | That’s fancy French toilet paper, not a sack of potatoes. | 这是高级法国厕纸 不是一代番茄 |
| [02:48] | This is Mr. Ree, the school janitor. | 这是雷先生 学校清洁工 |
| [02:50] | He’s a dedicated employee | 他是一名认真的员工 |
| [02:51] | and definitely doesn’t have a secret past. | 绝对没有秘密的过去 |
| [02:54] | Ooh, I’ve said too much. | 我说的太多了 |
| [02:57] | Three-ply, quilted, plush weave. | 三层 棉的 毛绒面 |
| [02:59] | Not the usual sandpaper you order. What’s the occasion? | 不是你经常定的那种草纸 为什么 |
| [03:01] | We have a new French teacher, and I want her to have the best. | 我们新来了一位法语老师 我想给她最好的 |
| [03:04] | So you got a crush on the “Ooh-la-la”? | 看来你对她有好感啊 |
| [03:06] | What? That’s ridiculous! | 什么 太荒谬了 |
| [03:08] | It’s not like I want to take long walks at the movies, | 我又不是想跟她散步看电影 |
| [03:11] | trading butterfly kisses or– or anything! | 进行蝴蝶吻之类的 |
| [03:14] | – Whatever floats your boat, chief. – My boat floats fine! | -你想开什么船都行 老大 -我的船很棒 |
| [03:18] | – Liar. – What? | -骗子 -什么 |
| [03:18] | Yeah, you heard me. | 你没听错 |
| [03:23] | Thanks, Marge. | 谢谢 玛姬 |
| [03:24] | Now, guard this toilet paper with your life. | 现在用你的生命守护这堆厕纸 |
| [03:27] | It was very expensive. | 非常贵的 |
| [03:29] | So expensive, I had to use most of your salary to pay for it. | 贵得我只能贴上你大部分的工资了 |
| [03:32] | 第二章 克拉普的爱 | |
| [03:34] | This is Ms. Yewh, the new French teacher. | 这是尤老师 新来的法语老师 |
| [03:36] | She loves everything French. | 她喜欢所有法国风的东西 |
| [03:39] | And she always wanted to go to Paris, | 她一直想去巴黎 |
| [03:41] | but she’d settle for French-speaking Canada. | 但是说法语的加拿大也行 |
| [03:43] | The best way to learn French is by speaking French, | 学法语最好的办法就是说法语 |
| [03:46] | which means in my French class we will only speak en franais. | 也就是说在我们的法语课上 我们只能说法语 |
| [03:50] | – Oui? – If we’re banned from the TP Teepee, | -好吗 -如果我们不能去厕纸帐篷 |
| [03:52] | where are we gonna get TP? | 我们要从哪里搞厕纸 |
| [03:53] | – Uh, the bathroom? – Smart. | -厕所 -真聪明 |
| [03:56] | Uh, excuse me. We got to go to the bathroom. | 不好意思 我们要去厕所 |
| [03:58] | Yeah, me too. | 我也是 |
| [03:59] | In French. | 用法语说 |
| [04:00] | You want us to go to the bathroom “In French”? | 你要我们用法语说去洗手间吗 |
| [04:02] | Oui, oui. | 是的 |
| [04:04] | We apologize for using a joke that is over 280 years old. | 抱歉我们用了一个土得掉渣的笑话 |
| [04:08] | Sit, s’il vous pla?t. | 请坐下 |
| [04:09] | Dang. | 讨厌 |
| [04:14] | What the… | 搞什… |
| [04:14] | Ms. Yewh, uh… | 尤老师 |
| [04:25] | I just wanted to make sure you’re settling in | 我只是想确保你适应这里 |
| [04:27] | and to see if you had any questions– | 看看你是否有任何问题 |
| [04:29] | I have a question. Why are you wearing skinny jeans? | 我有一个问题 你为什么穿紧身牛仔裤 |
| [04:32] | No more questions, you two! | 你们俩不准再问问题 |
| [04:33] | Did you join a band? | 你参加乐队了吗 |
| [04:35] | Go stand at the window | 去窗边罚站 |
| [04:36] | and pick out the Dumpster you’ll be living in | 然后给我退出法语教室 |
| [04:38] | after you flunk out of French class! | 去收拾你们即将要住的大垃圾箱 |
| [04:41] | – Okay. – Anyway… | -好 -话说 |
| [04:43] | Do you have everything you need? Chalk– | 你还缺些什么吗 粉笔… |
| [04:47] | Uh, anyway, there’s a new teacher orientation this afternoon. | 话说 今天下午有一场新教师介绍会 |
| [04:51] | It’s gonna be a blast! And it’s… | 肯定会很轰动的 而且 |
| [04:54] | …mandatory! | 必须出席 |
| [04:57] | This is our current TP inventory? | 这是我们目前的厕纸存货吗 |
| [04:58] | Seven squares? We couldn’t even cover a– | 只有七截吗 我们都不够用来… |
| [05:01] | Holy cow! George, look. | 我的天 乔治 你看 |
| [05:05] | Whoa. A TP mother lode. | 厕纸矿山 |
| [05:07] | It’s a TP TD. | 那是厕纸触地得分 |
| [05:10] | Touchdown! | 触地得分 |
| [05:12] | – So good. – You’re not getting anything | -太好了 -除了立刻去我办公室谈话 |
| [05:14] | except a talking-to in my office, now. | 你们什么也得不到 |
| [05:17] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [05:26] | That toilet paper is for Ms. Yewh and Ms. Yewh only. | 那些厕纸是专门为尤老师一个人准备的 |
| [05:30] | She must go to the bathroom a lot. | 她去洗手间的次数肯定很频繁 |
| [05:32] | Yeah. That’s a lot of “Oui, oui.” | 是的 那可是很多的”是的” |
| [05:34] | Ooh, we’re sorry again. | 再次表示抱歉 |
| [05:36] | She’s an excellent teacher with a great head of hair, | 她是一位出色的教师 拥有一头美丽的秀发 |
| [05:39] | and she smells like Saint Patrick’s Day. | 而且身上有圣帕特里克节的味道 |
| [05:41] | What? | 什么 |
| [05:42] | So keep your grubby little paws off that toilet paper, | 所以不准你们肮脏的爪子去碰那些厕纸 |
| [05:45] | or else. | 不然看着办 |
| [05:45] | – Or else what? – You– you… know what else! | -不然怎样 -你们知道的 |
| [05:47] | – You don’t have anything, do you? – Get out! | -你根本没招吧 -出去 |
| [05:51] | Let’s roll– TP roll. | 我们走 厕纸卷 |
| [06:00] | Yeah! | 好棒 |
| [06:02] | Nope. | 不行 |
| [06:06] | Not yours. | 不是你们的 |
| [06:09] | For Ms. Yewh! | 为了尤老师 |
| [06:11] | We’re never gonna get that TP. | 我们永远也拿不到那些厕纸 |
| [06:13] | He’s keeping all of that for Ms. Yewh. She’s the problem. | 他把所有厕纸都留给尤老师 她才是问题 |
| [06:16] | You’re right. So… what if we got rid of Ms. Yewh? | 你说得对 如果我们撵走尤老师呢 |
| [06:20] | You mean like… | 你是说 |
| [06:21] | Yes. | 没错 |
| [06:22] | We make a comic to embarrass her so much, she quits. | 我们画个漫画让她丢脸 她就会辞职了 |
| [06:25] | It’s worked before– well, by accident. | 之前成功过的 虽然是意外成功的 |
| [06:28] | Captain Underpants | 内裤队长 |
| [06:29] | and the Quarrelsome Tyranny of Queen Tootenfarti, | 之残暴好斗的响屁女王 |
| [06:33] | by George Beard and Harold Hutchins. | 由乔治·彼尔德和哈罗德·哈钦森所作 |
| [06:34] | Once, there was this annoying French teacher | 以前 有一个讨厌的法语老师 |
| [06:36] | who was awful and really loved French stuff | 不仅人坏 而且很喜欢法国的事物 |
| [06:38] | and made all the kids talk French, like, “Oui, oui, oui, oui.” | 总是逼所有的孩子说法语 |
| [06:41] | One day, she took the kids on a field trip in a bus and stuff. | 有一天 她带孩子们坐车外出游玩 |
| [06:43] | They were all, “Yay,” until they found out | 大家都很兴高采烈 直到他们发现 |
| [06:45] | it was to a museum to see French junk. | 只是去博物馆看法国废物 |
| [06:47] | – “Le boring!” – “I le know!” | -“无聊” -“就是” |
| [06:49] | But first, they had to walk through the mummy exhibit. | 但是他们得先经过木乃伊展 |
| [06:51] | The mummy was Queen Tootenfarti, an ancient Egyptian queen. | 那具木乃伊叫做响屁女王 一位古埃及皇后 |
| [06:54] | The sign said, “Don’t touch the mummy,” | 指示牌上写着 “别碰木乃伊” |
| [06:56] | but the teacher did ’cause she’s dumb, | 可老师还是碰了 因为她是笨蛋 |
| [06:58] | and the mummy woke up, | 结果木乃伊觉醒了 |
| [06:58] | and she farted her mummy spirit into the teacher | 她对老师放了一个奇臭无比的响屁 |
| [07:01] | and made the teacher the mummy. | 让她变成了木乃伊 |
| [07:03] | Her face got all rotten and yucky. | 她的整张脸腐烂又恶心 |
| [07:05] | She scared all the kids. “Groan! Groan in French!” | 她吓坏了所有的孩子 嘴里用法语哼哼着 |
| [07:08] | Captain Underpants flew in. “Tra-la-la-la-la. | 内裤队长飞了进来叫道 |
| [07:10] | Stop, mummy!” | “住手 木乃伊” |
| [07:11] | And she’s all, “I will eat you, | 她还是用法语说 |
| [07:12] | ’cause I’m hungry” — also in French. | “我会吃掉你 因为我饿了” |
| [07:14] | Captain Underpants is like, “So? Me too! | 内裤队长说 “那又怎样 我也饿了 |
| [07:17] | I had to leave dinner | 为了来打倒你 |
| [07:18] | with my mummy to come fight you, mummy!” | 我不能和我妈妈吃晚饭 木乃伊” |
| [07:20] | The mummy attacked, | 木乃伊出招了 |
| [07:21] | but he could see she was kind of sad and stuff. | 但是他看得出她有点难过 |
| [07:23] | Captain Underpants thought, | 内裤队长想 |
| [07:24] | “Hey, she was in a box, like, very long! | “她在箱子里待了很长时间 |
| [07:27] | She must be lonely!” | 她肯定是寂寞了” |
| [07:28] | So he wrapped himself in toilet paper | 所以他给自己裹上厕纸 |
| [07:29] | and made her think he was her boyfriend. | 让她认为他是她男朋友 |
| [07:31] | “You’re so pretty, grr and groan!” | 他说”你真漂亮 哼哼” |
| [07:33] | She fell for it and he grabbed her hand, | 她相信了 然后他抓住她的手 |
| [07:35] | but ’cause she was a million years old, it crushed to dust. | 可因为她已经上亿岁了 所以碎成了灰烬 |
| [07:38] | “Oops,” Said Captain Underpants. | 内裤队长说 “糟了” |
| [07:39] | The mummy was all, | 木乃伊气疯了 |
| [07:40] | “Now I’m mad and French,” | 说”现在我很生气 而且我是法国人” |
| [07:41] | which is super dangerous. | 这可是超级危险的 |
| [07:44] | She attacked! She, like, threw out all this old stuff | 她出招了 她把所以古文物扔得到处都是 |
| [07:46] | and went, “Oui oui, oui, oui, oui, oui,” all over the place. | 然后用法语说”是的 是的” |
| [07:49] | He fell inside a car-sar-ca-gophulous box! | 他掉进了一具木乃伊棺材里 |
| [07:52] | She was gonna eat Captain Underpants! | 她正准备吃掉内裤队长之际 |
| [07:53] | But then someone came and hit her on the head | 然后有人来了 用平底锅砸她的头 |
| [07:55] | with a frying pan and knocked her out. | 把她砸晕了 |
| [07:57] | “Who did that?” Said the kids. | 孩子们说”谁干的” |
| [07:59] | And Captain Underpants said, “Why, that’s my mummy!” | 内裤队长说”怎么了 是我妈妈干的” |
| [08:01] | And it was! It was his mom who stopped the old French Fartentooti | 的确 是他妈妈阻止了这个法国老臭屁 |
| [08:06] | and saved the day. | 拯救了大家 |
| [08:07] | The end. | 大结局 |
| [08:08] | So how long before Ms. Yewh quits? | 尤老师还要多久会辞职呢 |
| [08:10] | All she has to do is read the comic, | 她只要看了这个漫画 |
| [08:13] | get mad, fill out all of the paperwork– | 就会生气 然后完成辞职申请… |
| [08:15] | – So… how long? – Six to eight years. | -那是多久 -六到八年 |
| [08:18] | – We can’t wait that long. – You two. | -我们等不了那么久 -你们两个 |
| [08:20] | Got a major gravy spill in the kitchen. | 厨房里的肉汁倒出来了 |
| [08:22] | Need your help. | 我需要你们的帮助 |
| [08:23] | You want us to wipe up gravy? | 你要我们去擦干净那些肉汁吗 |
| [08:24] | No. You’re not certified for that. | 不 你们还不够格干这个 |
| [08:27] | I need you to guard that toilet paper. | 我需要你们去守着那些厕纸 |
| [08:35] | You see, Mr. Krupp asked Mr. Ree to guard the toilet paper, | 克拉普老师让雷先生去守着那些厕纸 |
| [08:39] | but neglected to say from whom– | 但他没有说要防谁… |
| [08:41] | meaning fortuitous error for George and Harold and this story. | 意味着乔治和哈罗德的偶然意外和这个故事 |
| [08:44] | *TP* | *厕纸* |
| [08:45] | *It’s not just for tushies. It can also be for pranks* | *不仅能擦屁股 还能搞恶作剧* |
| [08:48] | *And it’s really a gas* | *它真的很令人愉快* |
| [08:50] | *That’s gas as in funny Not gas as in farty* | *那是有趣的源泉 不是真正的汽油* |
| [08:53] | *Cause pranking with TP is always a blast* | *因为用厕纸搞恶作剧很爽* |
| [08:56] | We’re so close. Almost legends. | 我们几乎要成为传奇了 |
| [08:58] | Just got to cover this last bit. Let’s hit it. | 还要包上最后一点 来吧 |
| [09:03] | Now, I know you like French stuff, | 我知道你喜欢法国的一切 |
| [09:05] | and I know you like to go to the bathroom, | 你喜欢去厕所 |
| [09:07] | So I got you a little surprise. | 所以我给你准备了个小惊喜 |
| [09:11] | Oh, no, eternal winter! | 不 永恒的冬天 |
| [09:23] | – No! – We’re not finished. | -不 -我们还没完成 |
| [09:24] | Oh, yes, you are. | 不 你们结束了 |
| [09:26] | And after you clean up this mess, | 清理完这些之后 |
| [09:27] | you’re going to mow the entire football field. | 去修剪整个球场的草坪 |
| [09:30] | That doesn’t sound so bad. | 听起来不是很糟 |
| [09:31] | – With your teeth! – What? | -用你们的牙修剪 -什么 |
| [09:33] | – How would we do that? – With your teeth! | -我们要怎么做 -用你们的牙齿 |
| [09:35] | But how would we do that? | 但我们怎么做得到 |
| [09:36] | With… with your teeth! | 用…用你们的牙齿 |
| [09:40] | Just wanted to see if he’d say it three times. | 只是想看看他会不会说三遍 |
| [09:42] | So good. | 太棒了 |
| [09:43] | 第三章 冲刷盛况 | |
| [09:46] | We were so close. This is gonna take forever. | 我们差点就成功了 这好难清理 |
| [09:48] | If only someone had invented | 只要有人发明 |
| [09:50] | a device to get rid of toilet paper quickly, | 一种快速除掉厕纸的设备 |
| [09:52] | perhaps using water to flush it away. | 也许可以用水冲掉它 |
| [09:54] | Wait. They did. | 等等 的确有这样的设备 |
| [10:03] | – It’s working. – Almost done. | -真的有用 -快搞定了 |
| [10:09] | – Dang, we’re good. – Even when we don’t want to do it. | -我们真厉害 -即使我们并不想这样 |
| [10:16] | Listen up, hairnets. I’ve got a very important date– | 听着 发套们 我有个很重要的约会 |
| [10:18] | err, that’s new teacher’s orientation, | 那是新老师的入职培训 |
| [10:20] | and everything needs to be perfect. | 一切都需要很完美 |
| [10:22] | I’ll get out the paper plates. | 我会把纸盘拿出去 |
| [10:24] | Paper? What are you– | 纸吗 你在… |
| [10:25] | Plastic! The good plastic. | 要塑料的 优质的塑料 |
| [10:27] | Now, Ms. Yewh likes French stuff, | 尤老师喜欢法国的东西 |
| [10:29] | so make the cafeteria look like French. | 所以要把食堂布置得像法国风格 |
| [10:32] | And make some escargot, whatever that is. | 做一些食用蜗牛之类的 |
| [10:38] | And clean up this dump. | 把这垃圾清理掉 |
| [10:41] | What is this? A comic? | 这是什么 漫画吗 |
| [10:43] | “Annoying French teacher,” “Queen Tootenfarti”… | “烦人的法国老师” “响屁女王” |
| [10:47] | Sacrebleu! | 天哪 |
| [10:48] | That’s a French word from the Internet. | 这是网上的一个法语单词 |
| [10:50] | Don’t worry, my sweet. I’ll make sure you never see this. | 别担心 小甜心 我不会让你看到这个 |
| [10:54] | I swear. | 我发誓 |
| [10:57] | Give me those comics! | 把漫画给我 |
| [10:59] | Give me that! | 给我 |
| [11:01] | And– ooh– that! | 还有你 |
| [11:09] | That’s all of ’em… I think. | 应该全部都在这里了 |
| [11:16] | But he thinks wrong. There was one left. | 但他错了 还剩下一本 |
| [11:19] | What? Quoi? Moi? | 什么 什么 是我吗 |
| [11:23] | Easiest cleanup ever. | 这是最简单的清理方法了 |
| [11:25] | Yep, we worked smarter, not harder. | 对 我们只需要更机智 不用更努力 |
| [11:30] | Hey, are your feet wet? | 你的脚湿了吗 |
| [11:32] | That can’t be good. | 糟糕 |
| [11:34] | 第四章 不 不C行 | |
| [11:35] | We got to unclog these toilets, | 我们要疏通厕所 |
| [11:37] | or Krupp is gonna flush us. | 否则克拉普要把我们冲走了 |
| [11:39] | Relax, buddy, we’re golden. | 放轻松 兄弟 我们可聪明了 |
| [11:40] | Look! | 看 |
| [11:41] | “Gone to The Clogs Mega Ultra Maximum-Strength Clog Remover.” | “清除堵塞就用超级无敌堵塞清除剂” |
| [11:45] | “Just use one drop.” Hmm. | “一滴就搞定” |
| [11:49] | How about the whole jug? | 不如整罐倒下去 |
| [11:54] | The whole jug? You’ve doomed us all. | 整罐都倒了吗 你害了大家 |
| [11:57] | That stuff’s experimental, | 那东西是试验性的 |
| [11:59] | unpredictable, and kind of pricey. | 效果不可预测 也很贵 |
| [12:01] | The pipes at Jerome Horowitz | 杰罗姆·霍维茨小学的水管 |
| [12:03] | were rated to handle the flushing of exactly 47 comics, | 只能承受冲走47本漫画 |
| [12:06] | one gallon of de-clogger, | 一加仑的堵塞清除剂 |
| [12:08] | and 500 rolls of toilet paper. | 还有五百卷厕纸 |
| [12:10] | As long as no one flushes one more… | 只要不再多冲走一本… |
| [12:12] | Quoi? Garbage. | 什么 垃圾 |
| [12:16] | That would be the “One more.” | 这就是那不可承受的一本 |
| [12:20] | Oh, poo. | 便便 |
| [12:35] | I am the queen! | 我是女王 |
| [12:38] | The queen of TP! | 厕纸女王 |
| [12:48] | I am the TP Mummy! | 我是厕纸木乃伊 |
| [12:50] | Give me TP! Oui, oui, oui! | 给我厕纸 |
| [12:54] | Okay, the whole jug was too much. | 一整罐太多了 |
| [12:56] | We’re gonna die! | 我们会死的 |
| [12:59] | If you want to live, come with me. | 如果你们想活命 就跟我来 |
| [13:09] | 第五章 加速仇恨 | |
| [13:14] | Ah, Ms. Yewh. | 尤老师 |
| [13:17] | I, um, uh, huh… see you’ve draped yourself | 我看你用湿厕纸 |
| [13:20] | in wet toilet paper. | 装饰自己 |
| [13:21] | Is that the latest in French style? | 是法国风格的最新流行趋向吗 |
| [13:26] | What? Ah, look! | 什么 看 |
| [13:28] | As you can see, I’m a big French fan myself. | 正如你所看到的 我自己是个大法国迷 |
| [13:33] | What is that? | 那是什么 |
| [13:34] | – Escargot. Snails. – Snail? | -蜗牛 蜗牛 -蜗牛 |
| [13:37] | Uh, yes. Of course. | 对 当然 |
| [13:42] | Mmm, so French. Want– | 太法国了 想… |
| [13:45] | I want all the TP! | 我想要所有的厕纸 |
| [13:48] | And once I have it, all will bow down before me | 一旦我拥有了所有厕纸 所有人都臣服于我 |
| [13:52] | or never go to the bathroom again! | 要么就永远都别再去厕所 |
| [13:56] | Uh, well, that’s, uh, that’s a big ask. Oof! | 那是个很大的请求 |
| [14:04] | I can’t believe there’s a secret toilet lab under the school. | 真难以置信 在学校下面竟然有个秘密厕所实验室 |
| [14:07] | No one’s supposed to know, but that monster was gonna get you, | 没人应该知道 但那怪物会抓住你们的 |
| [14:10] | so I had no choice. | 所以我别无选择 |
| [14:16] | So, what, you’re some kind of secret toilet agent? | 那么 你是某种秘密厕所代理吗 |
| [14:19] | Used to be. I was in charge of making T.E.R.D.S. | 以前是 我负责制造厕超祛器 |
| [14:22] | – Gross! – It’s an acronym. | -好恶心 -是首字母缩写 |
| [14:24] | It stands for Toilet Eliminator of Really Dangerous Stuff. | 全称是厕所超危险物质祛除器 |
| [14:27] | But if you were a secret toilet guy, | 但是如果你是秘密厕所的人 |
| [14:29] | why did you work at the school? | 你为什么在学校工作 |
| [14:31] | Uh, mainly, I get to keep anything | 我主要保管 |
| [14:32] | that’s been in the lost and found more than a month. | 在失物招领处放了超过一个月的东西 |
| [14:34] | Really? That’s it? | 真的吗 就这样 |
| [14:43] | All right, all right. I’ll tell you. | 好了 好了 我告诉你们 |
| [14:44] | Just quit hounding me, will you? | 别缠着我了 行吗 |
| [14:48] | In the late 1990s, the government hired me to make T.E.R.D.S., | 在二十世纪九十年代代末 政府雇我制造厕超祛器 |
| [14:52] | a huge, massive toilet to | 一个大的 巨大的厕所 |
| [14:54] | eliminate the most serious threats on Earth– | 来消除地球上最严重的威胁… |
| [14:56] | poisonous chemicals, weapons of mass destruction, envelopes. | 有毒的化学品 大规模杀伤性武器 信封 |
| [14:59] | Envelopes? | 信封 |
| [15:00] | Ever gotten a paper cut from one of those bad boys? | 有被这些坏家伙割伤过吗 |
| [15:03] | Anyway… | 不管怎样… |
| [15:04] | During our first official test flush, the handle got stuck. | 在我们第一次试冲的时候 把手卡住了 |
| [15:12] | Run! | 快跑 |
| [15:15] | Massive flooding. | 大洪水 |
| [15:17] | I tried to jiggle it, but the handle wouldn’t budge. | 我尝试摇晃它 但把手并没有动 |
| [15:24] | I jiggled. | 我摇啊摇 |
| [15:26] | I jiggled and jiggled and | 我摇啊摇 |
| [15:27] | jiggled and jiggled and jiggled until… | 摇啊摇 摇啊摇直到… |
| [15:30] | No! | 不 |
| [15:43] | People got hurt. | 人们受伤 |
| [15:44] | It was all my fault. | 都是我的错 |
| [15:47] | They shut us down, and I left T.E.R.D.S. behind me, | 他们关停了我们 留下了破碎的 |
| [15:51] | shattered. | 厕超祛器 |
| [15:52] | Wait a minute. M-maybe we could use T.E.R.D.S. | 等等 也许我们能利用厕超祛器 |
| [15:55] | To stop that mummy. | 来阻止木乃伊 |
| [15:56] | You can’t give up. If Horatio Dump had given up, | 你不能放弃 如果霍雷肖·邓普放弃了 |
| [15:59] | there’d be trash everywhere. | 就到处都是垃圾了 |
| [16:00] | Horatio Dump? The Horatio Dump? | 霍雷肖·邓普 那个霍雷肖·邓普 |
| [16:02] | He’s the reason I got into the field of elimination sciences. | 他是我进入消除科学领域的原因 |
| [16:05] | So you’re in? ‘Cause we really need your T.E.R.D.S.. | 所以你加入了 因为我们真的需要你的厕超祛器 |
| [16:08] | – You got to help us. – Come on. | -你得帮我们 -拜托 |
| [16:09] | Yeah. | 好 |
| [16:10] | Stop! Just stop. Don’t you see? Don’t you get it? | 停 停下来 你们没看到吗 你们不明白吗 |
| [16:15] | – Not really. – Me neither. | -不太明白 -我也是 |
| [16:16] | Sorry, boys, but I flushed T.E.R.D.S. away, | 抱歉 孩子们 但是我不再想厕超祛器的事了 |
| [16:19] | which is too bad, | 太糟了 |
| [16:19] | because it’s almost as if I was put here to solve | 因为就像是把我放在这里 |
| [16:21] | this very specific problem. | 来专门解决这类特别的问题的 |
| [16:24] | Anyway, good luck. | 不管怎样 祝你好运 |
| [16:25] | – Well, that was a huge waste of time. – Yeah. | -那可真是浪费时间 -是啊 |
| [16:27] | – Let’s go get Captain Underpants. – Yeah! | -去叫内裤队长吧 -好 |
| [16:30] | Ooh, a sign. “Caution: T.E.R.D.S. Slippery when wet.” | 一个标语 “小心 湿的时候厕超祛器很滑” |
| [16:33] | – No need to change this sign. – Nope. Can’t beat perfect. | -没必要改这标语了 -不需要改 已经最完美了 |
| [16:39] | Where… is… TP? | 厕纸…在…哪 |
| [16:43] | I don’t know. The bathroom? | 不知道 厕所 |
| [16:50] | We’ll always have cafeteria Paris. | 我们总是有巴黎自助餐厅 |
| [16:52] | Come on, Captain Underpants. | 快 内裤队长 |
| [17:01] | Captain Underpants, there’s a TP Mummy on the loose. | 内裤队长 厕纸木乃伊在为害四方 |
| [17:03] | Right. Whatever that means, it sounds bad. I like it. | 好 无论那是什么意思 听起来都很糟糕 我喜欢 |
| [17:08] | Which way? | 哪一边 |
| [17:13] | Hey, mummy. I’m gonna wipe you out. | 木乃伊 我来擦掉你 |
| [17:16] | Get it? ‘Cause toilet paper. | 明白吗 因为厕纸 |
| [17:19] | The following scene is so violent, | 接下来的画面太过于暴力 |
| [17:21] | we’re presenting it in the harmless graffiti | 我们用经常出现在厕所中的 |
| [17:22] | often found in public restrooms. | 无害的涂鸦来呈现 |
| [17:24] | Enjoy Stall-O-Rama. | 请欣赏连环画 |
| [17:26] | There once was a man who wore undies. | 曾经有个穿内裤的人 |
| [17:28] | He had a tough time with a mummy. | 他和木乃伊苦战 |
| [17:29] | He tried to fight back, but she gave him a smack. | 他想回击 她却给了他一巴掌 |
| [17:32] | And in the end, | 最后 |
| [17:33] | “Jimmy Slapthighs was here.” Wait, what? | “吉米·斯拉夫斯到此” 等等 什么 |
| [17:39] | Somebody call a plumber! | 来人啊 叫水管工 |
| [17:51] | I want all the TP! | 我要所有的厕纸 |
| [17:58] | – How are we gonna stop her? – With T.E.R.D.S.! | -我们要怎么阻止她 -用厕超祛器 |
| [18:02] | It’s Mr. Ree! | 是雷先生 |
| [18:11] | You were right, boys. It’s time for T.E.R.D.S.. | 你说得对 孩子 该用厕超祛器了 |
| [18:14] | Yeah! | 没错 |
| [18:15] | Now, if we only we had a way to make that TP Mummy follow us. | 要是我们能让这个厕纸木乃伊跟着我们 |
| [18:19] | That’s it! There! | 用那个 那里 |
| [18:20] | The TP Teepee TP. | 厕纸帐篷尖的厕纸 |
| [18:22] | “TP Teepee TP”? | 厕纸帐篷尖的厕纸 |
| [18:23] | – There. – Oh! The TP Teepee TP. Got it. | -那里 -厕纸帐篷尖的厕纸 没问题 |
| [18:27] | Then this happened. | 然后就这样了 |
| [18:29] | – She’s right behind us. – Keep running! | -她就在我们后面 -继续跑 |
| [18:35] | Mr. Ree, we’re running out of TP. | 雷先生 我们没有厕纸了 |
| [18:37] | Hang on, boys. T.E.R.D.S. Is dead ahead. | 坚持住 孩子们 厕超祛器就在前面 |
| [18:40] | Are you sure that’s it? | 你确定就是那里吗 |
| [18:42] | ‘Cause it looks like a regular mountain. | 因为这看上去只是一座普通的山 |
| [18:44] | The mountain will open, kid! | 这座山会打开 孩子们 |
| [18:45] | – Are you sure that’s– – The mountain will open! | -你确定那是… -这座山会打开 |
| [18:50] | It’s a– – | 这是… |
| [18:51] | Oh, yeah, right, the top. The top opens. Ah, it’s been a while. | 没错 山顶 山顶会打开 好久没用过了 |
| [18:59] | Tp! Tp! | 厕纸 厕纸 |
| [19:01] | Tp! Tp! Tp! Tp! | 厕纸 厕纸 厕纸 厕纸 |
| [19:07] | T.E.R.D.S. Is on the other side of that door. | 厕超祛器就在门的另一边 |
| [19:10] | Now, what was that code? | 密码是什么 |
| [19:12] | – Try number one. – Try number two. | -试试一号 -试试二号 |
| [19:14] | Oh, yeah, 12. | 没错 12 |
| [19:17] | Welcome to T.E.R.D.S., gentlemen. | 欢迎来到厕超祛器 先生们 |
| [19:20] | This is the omega toilet. | 这是欧米伽超级厕所 |
| [19:27] | Yep, it’s a big toilet. | 没错 真是个大厕所 |
| [19:29] | It sure is. | 没错 |
| [19:33] | More TP! | 还要厕纸 |
| [19:34] | Okay, boys, T.E.R.D.S. Is a go. | 孩子们 厕超祛器启动 |
| [19:38] | Captain Underpants, distract her. | 内裤队长 支开她 |
| [19:39] | Great idea! | 好主意 |
| [19:42] | Pick a card, any card. | 选一张牌 随便哪张 |
| [19:44] | Oh, no! She hates magic! | 不 她讨厌魔法 |
| [19:46] | Try what you did in our comic. | 试试你在漫画里做的 |
| [19:52] | And then I… I… | 然后我…我… |
| [19:54] | Good stuff, boys! I’m on it! | 好样的 孩子们 我马上去 |
| [19:59] | Want to go to the dump? | 想去垃圾桶里吗 |
| [20:01] | – It’s romantic. – I will destroy you! | -很浪漫哦 -我要毁了你 |
| [20:04] | Sounds like a yes to me. | 我觉得你是答应了 |
| [20:08] | Captain Underpants, phase two. | 内裤队长 第二阶段 |
| [20:19] | – You need to unwind. – It’s working! | -该脱掉了 -成功了 |
| [20:23] | What? | 什么 |
| [20:24] | You cannot flush me! | 你们冲不走我 |
| [20:27] | – What are we gonna do now? – Oui, oui, oui, oui! | -我们现在怎么办 -对对对对 |
| [20:29] | Bow down before me! | 在我面前低头吧 |
| [20:33] | Oui, oui! | 对对 |
| [20:34] | Oh, no! | 不 |
| [20:36] | – Oui, oui, oui! – What… | -对对对 -发… |
| [20:38] | is… going… on? | 生…了…什…么… |
| [20:41] | Oh, no! He’s turning back into Krupp. | 不 他要变回克拉普了 |
| [20:46] | Oui, oui, oui, oui, oui! | 对对对对对 |
| [20:47] | Mr. Ree, it’s overflowing. Help! | 雷先生 满出来了 救命 |
| [20:49] | – What do you want me to do? – Jiggle the handle! | -你们要我怎么做 -按下把手 |
| [20:53] | Jiggle the handle! | 按下把手 |
| [20:54] | Jiggle the handle! | 按下把手 |
| [20:57] | No. No, I-I can’t. | 不 不 我做不到 |
| [20:59] | You have to. Remember Horatio Dump. He didn’t give up. | 你必须要 想想霍雷肖·邓普 他不会放弃 |
| [21:04] | What should I do, Mr. Dump? | 我该怎么办 邓普先生 |
| [21:06] | Jiggle it. Just a little bit. | 按下来 就一点点 |
| [21:09] | I… can… jiggle it! | 我…能…按下 |
| [21:19] | It’s flushing! | 冲下去了 |
| [21:32] | And it didn’t expl– | 而且没有爆… |
| [21:37] | 第六章 短话更短说 | |
| [21:42] | It worked. | 成功了 |
| [21:45] | Where am I? And what’s that smell? | 我在那里 这是什么味道 |
| [21:47] | Smells like victory. | 胜利的味道 |
| [21:52] | No, it smells like a toilet. | 不 闻上去像是厕所 |
| [21:56] | Merci. You’re the janitor, oui? | 谢谢 你是清洁工吧 |
| [21:59] | Oui. | 对 |
| [22:00] | – French? – Actually… | -法国人 -其实 |
| [22:01] | French-Canadian. | 法加混血 |
| [22:04] | Close enough. | 也行了 |
| [22:05] | Wait! Wait! | 等等 等等 |
| [22:09] | I ate a snail for her. | 我为她吃了个蜗牛呢 |
| [22:11] | That was amazing! | 真是太棒了 |
| [22:13] | It’s too bad no one will ever know about this, | 只可惜没有人会知道这一切 |
| [22:15] | you know, because we’re deep inside the mountain of T.E.R.D.S. | 因为我们在厕超祛器的山里 |
| [22:19] | Sad high five. | 悲伤击掌 |
| [22:20] | Yep. Guess we’ll never be legends. | 看来我们永远不会是传奇了 |
| [22:22] | Except, in fact, they would be legends, | 然而事实上 他们会成为传奇 |
| [22:24] | because that huge amount of toilet paper flew through the sky | 因为大量的厕纸被冲向天空 |
| [22:27] | and completely covered Jerome Horwitz Elementary School. | 完全盖住了杰罗姆·霍维茨小学 |
| [22:31] | Ha! They did it! The knuckleheads did it. | 他们成功了 这两个呆子成功了 |
| [22:35] | Legends. | 传奇 |