时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:04] | Han, what’re you doing in our bar? | 阿憨 你来我们酒吧干嘛 |
[00:06] | You know we can’t serve kids. | 你明知道酒吧禁止接待未成年人 |
[00:08] | Or did you just want to see | 还是你是想看看 |
[00:09] | what a successful business looks like? | 一门成功的生意是怎么样 |
[00:12] | I know what a successful business looks like. | 我知道成功的生意是怎么样啊 |
[00:14] | My cousin runs a Blimpie’s in Queens. | 我表哥在皇后区开了廉价潜艇堡店 |
[00:17] | You have a relative that works at a Blimpie’s? | 你有亲戚在廉价潜艇堡店工作啊 |
[00:20] | Is he single? | 他单身吗 |
[00:25] | Hi, I’m Clint, the new bartender. | 我叫克林特 我是新来的酒保 |
[00:26] | It’s a pleasure for you to meet me. | 你能认识我是你的荣幸 |
[00:29] | I hired Clint away from that cool bar down the street. | 我从街尾那家很酷的酒吧把克林特挖来 |
[00:32] | He has a following. | 他有追随者 |
[00:33] | And his following followed him here, | 而他的追随者追随他到我们这了 |
[00:34] | and now we have a following. | 所以我们店也有追随者了 |
[00:35] | You following? | 你能听懂[追随]吗 |
[00:38] | Oh, a following. | 追随的粉丝啊 |
[00:39] | Like I had on YouTube before they got all weird about nudity. | 在视频网站严查裸露视频前 我也有很多啊 |
[00:57] | Girls, this place has more people in it | 老妹 在你这里的人 |
[00:59] | than my first marriage. | 比我首段婚姻还人多 |
[01:02] | Hey, Earl. | 厄尔 |
[01:02] | Cacao Storm for my diabetic dreamboat? | 给我的糖尿病梦中情人来杯可可风暴吗 |
[01:05] | Well, you know I can’t say no to booze. | 你知道我拒绝不了酒 |
[01:07] | If I could, I’d still be in The Temptations. | 如果能 我就不会从大牌黑人合唱团被踢走了 |
[01:10] | No, no, no, it’s very little booze, okay? | 不不 这里面酒精含量非常少 |
[01:13] | See, you drink it for the raw cacao. | 主要卖点是原可可粉 |
[01:15] | Yeah, it releases serotonin | 它有助于释放血清素 |
[01:17] | and boosts your energy and your mood. | 激发你的能量 振奋你的心情 |
[01:18] | I’m pretty much a genius. | 我基本上就是个天才 |
[01:22] | And I’m pretty much gonna pass. | 我基本上还是不喝了吧 |
[01:26] | You want to try a Cacao Storm? Huh, buddy? | 想试一杯可可风暴吗 小兄弟 |
[01:29] | Yeah, you do. | 你当然想喝 |
[01:30] | They’re addictive. | 它们可让人上瘾了 |
[01:32] | Raw cacao with a little chocolate liqueur. | 原可可粉搭配少量巧克力酒 |
[01:34] | It’s how I got to be such a big deal. | 我就是靠这个变得远近驰名 |
[01:38] | And it’s how I’m gonna get a new wardrobe | 我也要靠这个卖得特好的饮品 |
[01:39] | with the way these are selling. | 买新衣服啦 |
[01:41] | Soon, I’ll be able to buy clothes from places | 很快我就不用去那种又卖天然气 |
[01:43] | that don’t also sell gas. | 又卖衣服的店里买衣服了 |
[01:46] | I’ll try one. I am a little stressed. | 我试一杯吧 我最近压力有点大 |
[01:49] | I’m entering the post office’s | 我要参加今年邮局的 |
[01:51] | Federal Duck Stamp Contest this year. | 联邦鸭子邮票大赛 |
[01:51] | 发行来为水禽及湿地保护筹款的邮票 上面图案采比赛征集制 此邮票深受集邮者喜爱 | |
[01:54] | They still have post offices? | 这年代了邮局还存在啊 |
[01:56] | I wonder if my “Wanted” Poster’s still up. | 真不知道我的那张通缉令还在不在 |
[01:59] | It is. You were a cute kid. | 还贴在墙上呢 你小时候超可爱 |
[02:02] | And they have a contest to design | 他们每年都举办比赛 |
[02:04] | a new duck stamp every year. | 设计新的鸭子邮票图案 |
[02:06] | If I win, my mallard drawing will be on | 我要是赢了 我画的绿头鸭 |
[02:08] | official United States postage. | 将会印在美国邮票上 |
[02:11] | How can there be a winner of a contest | 这比赛怎么可能有赢家 |
[02:12] | you have to be a loser to enter? | 参赛的全是人生输家啊 |
[02:15] | You feeling the buzz yet, son? | 感觉到那股爽劲儿了吗 小弟弟 |
[02:18] | You should. I only use pure Columbian cacao. | 应该会感觉到 我用的可是科伦比亚纯可可 |
[02:21] | Strongest in the city– actually, in the state. | 全市劲儿最强的 其实是本省最强 |
[02:23] | I just didn’t want to brag about it. | 我不想太显摆而已 |
[02:25] | It’s one of the greatest things about me. | 谦虚是我最大的优点之一 |
[02:28] | Yes, yes. | 的确 的确有啊 |
[02:29] | I think I feel it. A little jolt. | 我感觉到了 小后劲 |
[02:32] | Wasn’t that your American Gladiator name? | 这是你《美国角斗士》里的艺名吗 |
[02:35] | Why you got to harsh my buzz? | 你为啥要来泼老子冷水 |
[02:39] | Wait till this duck flies to stamp victory. | 等我的鸭画荣获桂冠 |
[02:42] | Then I’ll be ridicule-proof. | 世间再无人敢嘲弄我 |
[02:43] | You’ll never be wedgie-proof. | 但你此生内裤还是会被人拉过头顶 |
[02:49] | I just checked our receipts. | 我看了一下我们的收入 |
[02:50] | We already made $1,500 tonight. | 我们今晚已经赚了一千五了 |
[02:52] | Max, if this keeps up, | 麦克斯 如果能保持 |
[02:53] | we’ll be able to watch Hulu without commercials. | 我们很快就能买线上视频无广告会员啦 |
[02:53] | 带广告是7.99美金一个月 无广告是11.99美金一个月 | |
[02:56] | $1,500 in one night? | 一晚上就有一千五吗 |
[02:59] | I didn’t even make that much | 我当年告发我妈的 |
[03:00] | when I turned in my mom for the reward money. | 悬赏奖金都没那么多 |
[03:03] | Plus, it think this is better than you bartending, Max. | 而且这样也比你亲自当酒保靠谱 |
[03:06] | You were great, but your “One for them, one for me” policy | 你也不错 但你的”你一杯 我也一杯”政策 |
[03:09] | got a little topless. | 最后有点无上限[上衣]了 |
[03:11] | You enjoyed the tips, didn’t you? | 你难道就没享受那小费吗 |
[03:14] | I said “tips.” | 我是说乳头[小费] |
[03:18] | Excuse me, excuse me. | 让让 让让 |
[03:25] | Haven’t you seen a stroller in a bar before? | 没在酒吧里见过婴儿推车吗 |
[03:29] | Hey, girls. | 姑娘们 |
[03:30] | What, you’re not even gonna say hello, | 你们连声招呼都不愿意打吗 |
[03:32] | ’cause I look like garbage? | 就因为我看起来像一坨垃圾 |
[03:35] | You didn’t even give us a chance, Sophie. | 你连让我们打招呼的机会都还没给 苏菲 |
[03:37] | You were too busy running over all of our customers. | 你刚才都在忙着碾过我们的顾客 |
[03:40] | Well, I’m sorry if I’m embarrassing you | 要是我的样子让你觉得丢人了 |
[03:42] | with the way I look, Caroline. | 那真是不好意思啊 卡洛琳 |
[03:45] | Look, I don’t have time to make me | 我都没时间把我自己 |
[03:47] | and baby Barbara look sexy. | 跟芭芭拉宝宝打扮性感 |
[03:49] | Max, maybe we should get manicures? | 麦克斯 或许我们可以去做个指甲 |
[03:52] | I haven’t had one since Gwyneth Paltrow | 我上次做指甲还是格温妮丝·帕特罗 |
[03:53] | was only a little annoying. | 只是稍微讨人厌的那年呢 |
[03:56] | We don’t have grooming money. | 我们哪来的美容钱啊 |
[03:58] | I’m still cutting my hair with a sword like Mulan. | 我到现在还像花木兰一样用剑斩头发呢 |
[04:01] | Max, we’re doing really well, | 麦克斯 我们生意这么棒 |
[04:03] | so why not enjoy our success a little? | 何不稍微享受一下我们的成功呢 |
[04:05] | I mean, we don’t have “screw you” money yet, | 虽然我们还没赚够”去你丫的”钱 |
[04:05] | 来自女星刘玉玲所发表的言论 指的是足够让自己 在工作上有不爽时 辞职走人无后顾之忧的存款 | |
[04:07] | but we have enough to be mildly unpleasant. | 但是也够过上只是轻微不爽的日子啦 |
[04:10] | No kiddin’! | 还真是呢 |
[04:13] | Oh, come on, come on! | 快点 快点啊 |
[04:15] | I want to get our nails did. | 我想快点去做指甲 |
[04:17] | Why does it take so long for a load to finish? | 为什么总是要这么久才能”完事” |
[04:21] | Have you tried dirty talk? | 你试过淫声浪语了吗 |
[04:26] | Oh, that’s my dryer. | 那是我的烘干机 |
[04:28] | Oh, mine now. | 现在是我的了 |
[04:29] | You snooze, you lose. | 走神你就输了 |
[04:32] | But I wasn’t snoozing, why am I losing? | 可我都没走神 怎么会输了呢 |
[04:35] | ‘Sup, Janice? | 最近好吗 珍妮丝 |
[04:37] | How’s things down at the Coinstar? | 零钱换钞小铺最近如何 |
[04:39] | I’m ready for a change. | 我准备好要”换”了 |
[04:43] | Max, don’t engage her, she threw my clothes on the ground. | 麦克斯 别跟人套近乎 她把我衣服都丢地上了 |
[04:46] | Buzzer go off? You snooze, you lose. | 警示音响起后 走神你就输了 |
[04:49] | Ugh, now I have to wash these again because there’s… | 现在这些都得重新洗过了 因为地上有… |
[04:52] | what I really hope is fudge on the floor. | 我真心希望地上的是巧克力松糕 |
[04:57] | Where’s my underwear? | 我的内裤上哪去了 |
[05:02] | Looks like Ralph has a job interview. | 貌似拉尔夫要去面试 得打扮体面 |
[05:05] | Ralph, that’s my underwear. | 拉尔夫 那是我的内裤 |
[05:07] | Give it back. | 还给我 |
[05:08] | Ugh, I can’t wait till we don’t have to come here anymore. | 真希望我们能快点不用再来这里 |
[05:11] | But where will we cook our chicken? | 那我们以后上哪煮鸡肉啊 |
[05:17] | You know what? | 你知道吗 |
[05:18] | We’re successful now. | 我们现在是成功人士 |
[05:19] | We don’t have to come here anymore. | 不需要再来这里了 |
[05:23] | Can I have your attention, everyone? | 大家能注意我一下吗 |
[05:24] | Uh, that depends, are you a cat video? | 得看了 你是可爱喵星人影片吗 |
[05:28] | I’d like to make an announcement. | 我想要宣布一件事 |
[05:30] | As of today, we are saying good-bye to this place. | 从今日起 我们要告别这里 |
[05:33] | So Ralph, you can keep my panties, | 拉尔夫 我的内裤你就收下吧 |
[05:35] | I know you have a wedding next month. | 我知道你下个月还有婚礼 |
[05:37] | Max and I are successful enough now to afford | 我跟麦克斯现在功成名就 |
[05:40] | our own washer and dryer. | 够钱买自己的洗衣机与烘干机 |
[05:43] | Or more realistically, a low-budget fluff-and-fold. | 实际点说 应该是廉价的请人洗衣服务 |
[05:46] | So take one last look at us– | 你们可以再看我们一眼 |
[05:48] | But no need to take out your penis, Marty. | 但不需要把你的鸡鸡掏出来 马蒂 |
[05:54] | Come on, Max, let’s go get our manicures. | 走吧 麦克斯 咱们去做指甲去 |
[05:56] | Good-bye, Laundromat, we are never coming back | 再见啦 自助洗衣店 我们永远不会再回 |
[05:58] | to this hell hole again. | 你这地狱深渊啦 |
[06:00] | You just put another load in the washer. | 你刚刚才又洗了一批衣服 |
[06:02] | We are coming back to this hell hole again. | 我们还会再回你这地狱深渊的 |
[06:09] | Earl, we got manicures! | 厄尔 我们做了指甲啦 |
[06:12] | Caroline wanted our nails to project success, so… | 卡洛琳想要我们的指甲透露出成功气息 所以… |
[06:18] | What says “Classy lady” like Monopoly houses? | 有什么比大富翁游戏的房子更显档次呢 |
[06:23] | Wow, congratulations, Max. | 恭喜你啊 麦克斯 |
[06:25] | This is probably the closest any of us will ever come | 这大概是我们这群人里 |
[06:27] | to owning a house. | 最接近拥有房子的一次了 |
[06:30] | Speak for yourself, Earl. | 厄尔 你买不起别牵扯上我们 |
[06:32] | Max and I are successful now. | 麦克斯跟我现在可成功了 |
[06:34] | I said good-bye to the Laundromat this morning, | 我今早跟自助洗衣店说了再见 |
[06:36] | and this afternoon, I said good-bye to the bodega | 今天下午 我跟那家我们去 |
[06:38] | where we get our flu shots. | 打流感疫苗的杂货店说了永别 |
[06:40] | You could’ve waited till after I got my | 你明明可以等到我买完我的 |
[06:41] | flu shot and sandwich combo. | 流感疫苗加三明治特价套餐再告别 |
[06:44] | Hi, could you bring me a water, please? | 能麻烦帮我倒杯水吗 |
[06:47] | Um, could you bring someone water | 如果你手指上有房子 |
[06:48] | if you had houses for fingers? | 你有办法帮人倒水吗 |
[06:54] | I can’t wait till we say good-bye to this place. | 真等不及能挥别这地方的时刻 |
[06:57] | I’m gonna be really mean. | 我绝对会毒舌到极点 |
[06:58] | I may do it as a poem. | 可能写首诗吐槽吧 |
[07:00] | What rhymes with “Rat-infested”? | 有什么跟”鼠辈为患”押韵啊 |
[07:03] | Flat-chested. | “平胸咋办” |
[07:07] | You better slow down. | 你别太得意忘形 |
[07:08] | We’ve only had one good night at the dessert bar, | 我们就只是甜品酒吧生意好了一晚 |
[07:10] | and you said we had to keep working at the diner | 你也说我们得在这里继续工作到 |
[07:12] | till we made enough to be legally poor. | 我们挣够钱升级到”合法”贫穷 |
[07:15] | Okay, fine. | 好吧 行 |
[07:16] | It’s like those nails are making you reasonable | 感觉那些指甲让你变得通情达理 |
[07:18] | and I don’t like it. | 我不喜欢 |
[07:26] | Han, your hair! | 阿憨 你的头发 |
[07:27] | Who are you supposed to be, Edward Scissor-hans? | 你这是什么造型 爱德华·小憨手吗 |
[07:32] | I was up all night, sketching my stamp. | 我一晚没睡 都在画我的邮票 |
[07:35] | Want to see my duck? | 想看我的鸭鸭[鸡鸡]吗 |
[07:37] | Praying that wasn’t an auto-correct. | 祈祷你说的话 不是错别字 |
[07:42] | Look at all the practice ducks I’ve drawn. | 看看这些我练习画的鸭 |
[07:44] | The American Wood duck. | 美国木鸭 |
[07:45] | The Harlequin duck. | 丑鸭 |
[07:47] | The Spot-Billed duck. | 斑嘴鸭 |
[07:49] | A mallard. | 绿头鸭 |
[07:50] | A mallard. | 绿头鸭 |
[07:52] | A mallard, a mallard– | 绿头鸭 绿头鸭 |
[07:54] | Caroline, take is batteries out. | 卡洛琳 把他的电池拔出来 |
[07:57] | This beauty’s gonna win me the stamp contest. | 这只美鸭将会为我赢得大赛 |
[08:00] | All I have to do now is color it. | 万事俱备 只差上色了 |
[08:02] | And then sit back and plan my victory party. | 然后好好休息 计划我的庆功派对 |
[08:06] | Guess which stamp I’ll use to send the invites? | 你猜我会用什么邮票来邮寄邀请函 |
[08:09] | Gay flag? | 基佬彩虹旗邮票吗 |
[08:11] | No, a mallard! | 不 是绿头鸭邮票 |
[08:15] | Where’d you get that cacao from? | 你从哪弄来的可可粉啊 |
[08:17] | Clint gave me a couple grams before he left last night. | 克林特收工回家之前留了几克给我 |
[08:20] | I’ve been micro-dosing it all day. | 我一整天都微剂量在服用 |
[08:35] | Why are you rubbing it on your gums? | 你为什么要直接抹牙龈上啊 |
[08:38] | Are you teething? | 长牙嘴痒吗 |
[08:41] | Clint says the buzz is stronger if I take it straight. | 克林特说直接吸收爽度更强 |
[08:45] | Okay, I didn’t believe Clint when he said cacao was addictive, | 我本来还不相信克林特说的可可粉会上瘾 |
[08:48] | but I also didn’t believe in leprechauns | 但我本来也不相信爱尔兰矮妖是真的 |
[08:50] | until I started working for one. | 但在矮妖店里做事后我就信了 |
[08:55] | If I cut my gums… | 如果我把牙龈割开 |
[08:59] | Will it enter my bloodstream any faster? | 粉会不会更快进入我的血管啊 |
[09:01] | You’re a junkie! | 老毒虫你应该懂啊 |
[09:03] | Han, you’re acting like that time you had a whole Red Bull. | 阿憨 你又跟上次喝完整瓶红牛一样嗨了 |
[09:07] | Okay… | 好了 |
[09:08] | you have a problem! | 你上瘾了 |
[09:11] | I’m telling Clint you’re cut off. | 我会告诉克林特不许再供应你 |
[09:14] | Well, I’m telling Clint I love him. | 那我要告诉克林特我爱他 |
[09:15] | He loves that. | 他就爱听这个 |
[09:18] | Fine, I’ll just finish my stamp without cacao. | 行 我只好不靠可可粉完成我的邮票了 |
[09:22] | Damn it! | 去你的 |
[09:26] | Hi, everybody! | 大家安安 |
[09:33] | I hope they’re never expecting Barbara | 我希望他们永远都不指望 |
[09:35] | to have a short-term memory. | 芭芭拉开始有任何短期记忆 |
[09:39] | Oh, look away, look away. | 别看了 别看我了 |
[09:42] | Things have gotten real bad. | 情况越来越糟糕了 |
[09:46] | I look like all of you now. | 我现在看起来像你们这帮人了 |
[09:49] | Sophie, why didn’t you come with us to the nail place? | 苏菲 你为什么不跟我们一起去做指甲 |
[09:52] | It was so much fun. | 可好玩了 |
[09:55] | I couldn’t make it, I was too busy | 我去不了 太忙了 |
[09:57] | bedazzling Barbara’s diapers. | 忙着给芭芭拉的尿布贴亮片 |
[10:01] | I’m just gonna have to face it– | 我只能接受这个事实了 |
[10:03] | I’m not gonna be pretty again for at least 12 years. | 我至少有12年的时间不能再美艳动人了 |
[10:08] | Oh, I’ll be Caroline’s age by then. | 天啊 到时候我就到了卡洛琳的岁数了 |
[10:12] | Sophie, I keep saying, you’ll always be sexy to me. | 苏菲 我总是告诉你 你在我眼里永远性感 |
[10:16] | And I hate to sound all lovey-dovey, | 我不想说些情意绵绵的肉麻情话 |
[10:18] | but you’re giving me a boner. | 但我的鸡因你而勃 |
[10:22] | You’re just saying that ’cause you have to. | 你是因为没得选才这么说 |
[10:25] | I don’t want your pity boner. | 我才不要你的同情勃 |
[10:32] | Caroline, if pity boners are a thing, | 卡洛琳 如果真有同情勃这回事 |
[10:34] | you have got to get back out there. | 那你得赶紧重出江湖啊 |
[10:38] | I was thinking the same thing. | 我刚才也在想同一件事 |
[10:44] | You got the stuff, Clint? | 克林特 你带货来了吗 |
[10:46] | It’s premium grade, right? | 是顶级货吧 |
[10:48] | If it isn’t, you’re in for a very | 如果不是 那你就准备接受 |
[10:51] | unpleasant conversation. | 一场不太愉快的交谈了 |
[10:54] | My guy from Columbia guarantees it. | 我哥伦比亚的供货商跟我保证过 |
[10:57] | Not the country, we went to college together. | 不是那个毒品大国 是我哥伦比亚大学的同学 |
[11:00] | Want a little taste? | 想验个货吗 |
[11:02] | You bet your butt I do! | 废话 还用你说 |
[11:03] | I want to make sure it’s not cut with Nestle Quik. | 我想确定里面没有掺杂便宜雀巢咖啡粉 |
[11:11] | That’s the stuff muddy donkeys are made of. | 脏驴鸡尾酒就是用这种货调的 |
[11:16] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
[11:18] | Uh, fancy meeting you here. | 没想到在这遇见你 |
[11:20] | Clint and I were just bro-ing out over… | 我和克林特在叙兄弟情呢 聊聊… |
[11:23] | sports. | 运动啊 |
[11:24] | And breasts. | 大胸啊 |
[11:26] | And…zoos? | 还有…动物园啊 |
[11:29] | What do men talk about? | 男人平时见面都聊什么呀 |
[11:31] | Hey, Max. | 麦克斯 |
[11:33] | We killed it last night, huh? | 昨晚我们赚翻了 对吧 |
[11:34] | Me more than you. | 我的功劳大过你哦 |
[11:36] | You gonna want this or not, I got to go do my podcast. | 你到底要不要 我得去做我的播客了 |
[11:39] | I’m interviewing myself. | 我要采访我自己 |
[11:41] | I know a drug deal when I see it! | 是不是毒品交易 我一看就能看出来 |
[11:44] | He’s cut off. | 他不许碰毒 |
[11:45] | Like me on $2 margarita night. | 就像2元酒之夜 我不许碰酒一样 |
[11:48] | Max, I need that cacao to finish my duck stamp! | 麦克斯 我需要可可粉来完成我的鸭子邮票 |
[11:51] | One last ride on the chocolate pony. | 让这匹巧克力小马再带我飞最后一次吧 |
[11:54] | Look at you– chocolate all over your face. | 瞧瞧你 满脸都是巧克力 |
[11:57] | You look like Jonah Hill reading the reviews for War Dogs. | 你就像《军火贩》的肥男主在看影评 爽得咧 |
[12:01] | Clint, don’t you dare sell it to him. | 克林特 你不许卖给他 |
[12:04] | You can’t tell me what to do, okay? | 轮不到你告诉我该怎么做 |
[12:06] | I’m serious–I will quit. | 我是说真的 我会辞职的哦 |
[12:08] | Oh, hmm, I’ll say the same thing I said to my mother– | 那把我对我妈说的同一句话送给你 |
[12:11] | resignation accepted. | 接受请辞 |
[12:14] | You just made a huge mistake. | 你犯了一个天大的错误 |
[12:18] | You’re talking to someone | 不用你说我也知道 |
[12:23] | Right, Han? | 你说是吧 阿憨 |
[12:27] | That scumbag couldn’t have taken all the cacao. | 那个人渣不可能把全部可可粉都带走吧 |
[12:30] | Quick, help me check the cabinets. | 快 帮我找找酒柜有没有 |
[12:33] | Keep away from my drawers, Han. | 别碰我的抽屉[内裤] 阿憨 |
[12:35] | You got to be used to hearing that. | 这句话你肯定整天听到 |
[12:39] | Max, I just gave a good-bye speech at the free clinic. | 麦克斯 我刚跟免费诊所告别了 |
[12:42] | Oh, also, the lab technician | 对了 那个实验室技术员 |
[12:44] | said for you to call her ASAP. | 让你尽快打给她 |
[12:47] | Ugh, Claire freaks out about everything. | 克莱尔什么事都爱大惊小怪 |
[12:50] | I’ll tear this place apart! | 我要把这地方翻个底朝天 |
[12:53] | Where the hell is the cacao? | 可可粉到底在哪里 |
[12:55] | What’s happening, where’s Clint? | 发生什么事了 克林特去哪儿了 |
[12:57] | – He quit. – He quit? | -他辞职了 -他辞职了 |
[12:59] | But what about his following? | 但他的追随者怎么办 |
[13:00] | What about our following? | 我们的追随者怎么办 |
[13:01] | What about my good-bye tour? | 我的告别巡回秀怎么办 |
[13:03] | Say good-bye to it. | 跟你的告别秀告别啊 |
[13:06] | I think I found some! | 我好像找到了点 |
[13:10] | Nope, that was straight-up dirt. | 不是 那是纯灰尘 |
[13:13] | It’s for the best. | 这样最好 |
[13:14] | ‘Cause Jane Cacaoski over there can’t get enough. | 因为那位可可粉小姐已经走火入魔了 |
[13:17] | I’ll just get back behind the bar. | 我回吧台后面[监狱]工作了 |
[13:19] | Now, if you’ll excuse me, one of my hotels came loose | 抱歉先失陪啦 其中一间牢房的犯人跑出来了 |
[13:22] | while I was giving someone the finger. | 都怪我当时忙着对人竖中指没看好 |
[13:25] | I guess I’m going to have to call that other dealer | 我想我只能打给广告分类网上 |
[13:27] | I found on Craigslist. | 另一位粉贩子了 |
[13:29] | I’m Ice-T and I need my Coco. | 我是老鼠 我要我的大米 |
[13:32] | Han, if you can get that cacao, | 阿憨 如果你能拿到可可粉 |
[13:33] | Max can make the Cacao Storms herself. | 麦克斯自己也能做可可风暴 |
[13:36] | I’ve seen her make opium out of poppy seed bagels and a Lacroix. | 我见过她用罂粟籽面包圈和气泡水做出鸦片 |
[13:40] | Han, call that dealer. | 阿憨 快打给粉贩子 |
[13:41] | Already dialing. | 已经拨出去了 |
[13:42] | I’m halfway down the Hershey Highway. | 我已经在去”后庭”的半路上了 |
[13:45] | I meant the Fudge Factory. | 我是说软糖工厂 |
[13:48] | I don’t want to hear about your personal life, | 我不想知道你的私生活 |
[13:50] | just call the dealer. | 快打电话吧 |
[13:55] | Han, where is this guy? | 阿憨 那家伙在哪儿 |
[13:57] | I’m scared. | 我好害怕啊 |
[13:58] | Someone might think we’re a couple. | 别人可能会误会我们是情侣 |
[14:01] | I hope he gets here soon. | 我也想他马上来啊 |
[14:02] | I just snorted a pint of Chunky Monkey. | 我刚吸食了一品脱的冰淇淋 |
[14:07] | That’s him, now act cool. | 他来了 淡定点 |
[14:09] | Yoo-hoo, Mr. Drug Dealer! | 毒贩子先生 你好呀 |
[14:11] | Right here. | 这边 |
[14:12] | You’re embarrassing me! | 你真让我丢脸 |
[14:14] | Oh, also, tell him we’re not a couple. | 对了 记得告诉他我们不是情侣 |
[14:17] | You guys here for the cacao? | 你们俩是来买可可粉的吗 |
[14:18] | Let’s cut to the chase, where’s the dope? | 废话少说 货在哪儿 |
[14:21] | Standing right in front of me. | 我面前就有一蠢货 |
[14:22] | We’re not together. | 我们不是情侣哦 |
[14:24] | You want the cops to hear us? | 你们想让警察听见吗 |
[14:26] | Would it matter? You’re selling chocolate. | 有关系吗 你是在卖巧克力粉 |
[14:29] | I know, but it’s more fun to act like it’s naughty. | 我知道 但假装违法感觉更好玩啊 |
[14:31] | That’s the only reason I do this. | 这是我干这行的唯一原因 |
[14:33] | I’m so bored. | 我无聊死了 |
[14:34] | I’m a stay-at-home grandpa. | 我是一名全职爷爷 |
[14:36] | Show me the skrank! | 给我看街粉 |
[14:38] | That’s the word I made up for street cacao. | 这是我为街头可可粉专门编造的一个词 |
[14:41] | Here it is. | 在这 |
[14:42] | Had to kill a hooker to get it. | 为了得到它 我还杀了一名妓女 |
[14:45] | I wish. | 瞎说的啦 |
[14:47] | My daughter-in-law works for Nestle. | 我的儿媳妇在雀巢工作 |
[14:52] | Earl, what’re you doing out here? | 厄尔 你在这里干嘛 |
[14:54] | Just to be clear, I’m out here with Han | 先把话说清楚 我跟阿憨在这里 |
[14:55] | for business, nothing romantic. | 纯粹是公事 绝对没私情 |
[14:59] | What are you doing out here | 你们在外面私会 |
[15:00] | with my Canadian Viagra connection? | 我的加拿大伟哥供货商干嘛 |
[15:04] | – Hey, Earl! – Hey, Bill! | -厄尔 -比尔 |
[15:07] | Hey, man, how’s your daughter-in-law? | 伙计 你的儿媳妇还好吗 |
[15:09] | Still climbing the corporate ladder at Nestle Toronto? | 还在多伦多的雀巢公司想着往上爬吗 |
[15:12] | And doing CrossFit on the weekends. | 然后周末健健身 |
[15:14] | And Ted’s finally got his real estate license. | 泰德终于拿到真正的房屋中介执照了 |
[15:16] | No one cares, Grandpa! | 没人想听 老爷爷 |
[15:19] | Tell that to the pigeons in the park! | 你去跟公园里的鸽子唠家常吧 |
[15:21] | I’m this close to main-lining Tootsie Rolls. | 老子都快要把巧克力糖注射进静脉了 |
[15:25] | – Here’s the money. – Not this again! | -给你钱 -不是吧 |
[15:28] | I come out here to smoke a joint, | 我就出来想抽支大麻烟 |
[15:30] | and I walk in on a drug deal? | 就这么让我撞见毒品交易吗 |
[15:32] | Shame! | 可耻 |
[15:34] | Hey, you! | 你 |
[15:35] | Get out of here before I pop a cap in your Honda Odyssey. | 快离开这 否则我就让你的面包车吃枪子儿 |
[15:38] | I’m sorry, it was either this, or have an affair. | 抱歉 要么干这行 要么干小三 |
[15:41] | And I’m just too tired. | 而我实在没那个体力啊 |
[15:45] | Well, it looks like I got to go tell Ruth | 看来我要告诉露丝 |
[15:47] | it’s gonna be an “everything but” kind of night | 今晚将会是”除了爱爱啥都行”之夜 |
[15:50] | Jeez. | 哎 |
[15:52] | I learned it from watching you, Dad? | 这都是跟你学的 父亲大人 |
[15:55] | Max, we need that cacao for our dessert bar. | 麦克斯 我们的甜品酒吧需要可可粉 |
[15:57] | I already told the soup kitchen what I think | 我已经跟救济厨房说了我对他们 |
[15:59] | of their tomato bisque, so there’s no turning back. | 番茄浓汤的真实想法 所以我们没有回头路了 |
[16:03] | Your addictions are both out of control. | 你们俩的瘾头都失控了 |
[16:06] | Caroline, there are no shortcuts to success | 卡洛琳 成功没有捷径 |
[16:09] | or creating a stamp-worthy mallard. | 创造一只能登上邮票的鸭子也是 |
[16:11] | Life is a slow, steady climb | 人生需要缓慢稳步往上爬 |
[16:14] | to just getting by. | 才能好好过活 |
[16:15] | Snap out of it! | 快振作起来 |
[16:17] | Me? You’re addicted too. | 别光说我 你也上瘾啊 |
[16:19] | To these nails. | 对象是你的美甲 |
[16:22] | No I’m not, I can stop any time! | 我才没有 我随时能打住 |
[16:29] | Then why are you crying? | 那你哭屁啊 |
[16:31] | ‘Cause I’m on my knees in an alley | 因为老娘在一条巷子里双膝跪地 |
[16:32] | and nothing fun is happening! | 却没有任何让我爽的事情发生 |
[16:35] | Home wrecker! | 破坏我”家”庭 |
[16:38] | You know, fine! | 好啊 |
[16:39] | Maybe I like the way they make me feel. | 或许我是迷上它们给我的感觉 |
[16:42] | But you–you were so high on success, | 可你呢 你如此热衷于成功 |
[16:45] | you were willing to let Han OD! | 你甚至愿意让阿憨吸粉过度 |
[16:47] | Or, at least, get really, really hyper-active. | 或者至少变得非常非常过度亢奋 |
[16:50] | So what? You don’t care about me, Max, do you? | 那又怎样 你又不在乎我 麦克斯 对吗 |
[16:54] | No. | 对啊 |
[16:57] | Maybe a little. | 或许有一点吧 |
[17:00] | See how your addiction has affected me, Caroline? | 看到你的瘾头对我造成多大的影响了吧 卡洛琳 |
[17:04] | I just had to admit I care about Han! | 害我刚不得不承认我在乎阿憨 |
[17:06] | Now I’m flying high on that! | 现在我真是开心到飞起啊 |
[17:08] | I’m gonna go try to finish my stamp. | 我要去试着完成我的邮票 |
[17:11] | Perhaps some hot cocoa would help. | 或许来杯热可可会有帮助 |
[17:13] | Administered rectally, of course. | 当然是指直接从直肠灌 |
[17:17] | Found it! | 找到了 |
[17:19] | Sophie? | 苏菲 |
[17:21] | Is there anyone we know not in this alley? | 怎么今晚所有熟人都在这条巷子里 |
[17:24] | I found Barbara’s bedazzler. | 我找到芭芭拉的水钻定型机了 |
[17:27] | Oh, yeah, it’s all about her now. | 是啊 现在啥事都以她为主 |
[17:30] | Oh, you can’t be gorgeous and be a good mother. | 很难同时做到外表美美哒 母爱棒棒哒 |
[17:33] | Just look at Neil Patrick Harris. | 你看尼尔·帕特里克·哈里斯就知道了 |
[17:36] | Well, I think he’s very charming | 我觉得他非常有个人魅力 |
[17:38] | and I think you’re being unfair. | 你这么说不公平了 |
[17:40] | This might be what’s left of my nails talking, but Sophie, | 这话可能是来自我剩余的美甲 但苏菲 |
[17:43] | if you’re not decked out with your boobs half showing, | 如果你不再用酥胸半露装饰自己 |
[17:45] | are you really setting the right example for Barbara? | 你是不是会给芭芭拉树立错误的榜样呢 |
[17:48] | Oh, from this side of the dumpster, | 对于身处垃圾箱中的我 |
[17:51] | you’re making a lot of sense, girl. | 你这话的确让我获益良多 姑娘 |
[17:54] | You really are. | 还真是 |
[17:55] | Are you gonna start brushing your teeth | 你要开始刷牙 |
[17:57] | and putting the seat down? | 把马桶盖放下来了吗 |
[17:59] | No. | 并没有 |
[18:02] | Here’s your flan-tini. | 这是你的果馅饼提尼 |
[18:04] | And here’s my flan-tini. | 这杯是我的果馅饼提尼 |
[18:06] | Good to be back. | 重回岗位感觉真好 |
[18:08] | Well, I tried, but I can’t find Clint. | 我试过了 但就是找不到克林特 |
[18:10] | I feel like every man I’ve ever had sex with. | 感觉就像我 跟男人上完床就跑没影一样 |
[18:14] | We don’t need Clint or his stupid cacao. | 我们才不需要克林特或他的傻逼可可粉 |
[18:16] | Uh, although, his podcast was pretty interesting. | 但是 他的播客还挺有意思的呢 |
[18:20] | Those girls he worked for sounded like nightmares. | 他的两位女老板听起来简直就是女魔头啊 |
[18:24] | I’m gonna have one, two, three Sprites. | 我要来一 二 三杯雪碧 |
[18:26] | We’re getting wild tonight. | 我们今晚想玩得野一点 |
[18:28] | Coming right up, Bill the Dealer. | 马上来 药头比尔 |
[18:30] | Oh, it’s just Bill now. | 现在就只是比尔了 |
[18:31] | I accidentally butt-dialed my wife during a major | 手机意外在我进行重大抗胃酸药交易时 |
[18:34] | Pepcid AC drop. | 打给了我老婆 |
[18:36] | She took the minivan. | 她把面包车没收了 |
[18:41] | Hey, everybody! | 大家安安 |
[18:44] | No, it’s not Suzanne Somers. | 不 我不是不老女星苏珊娜·萨默斯 |
[18:47] | It’s me, Sophie! | 是我 苏菲 |
[18:49] | Wow, Sophie got her sexy back. | 苏菲又回性感艳后路线了 |
[18:52] | Yeah, and front and under. | 还有艳胸跟艳穴 |
[18:55] | Sophie, you deserve a flan-tini. | 苏菲 这杯果馅饼提尼是你应得的 |
[18:58] | And so do I. | 也是我应得的 |
[19:00] | Oh, you know what, I did what you told me to do | 我按你让我做的方法做 |
[19:02] | and I dropped baby Barbara off at the trainer/babysitter, | 然后把芭芭拉宝宝送到了训练师兼保姆那里 |
[19:05] | and I had a bunch of Korean ladies go to town on me. | 然后再让一帮韩国女人帮我修剪”杂毛” |
[19:10] | Hey, where’s Oleg? | 奥列格呢 |
[19:11] | I told him to meet me here. | 我告诉他在这里跟我碰面 |
[19:16] | Sophie? | 苏菲 |
[19:18] | You look as beautiful as the day | 你今日美艳动人的程度 |
[19:19] | we first did it on the sink. | 犹如我们首次在洗手槽做爱的那天 |
[19:23] | Damn straight, I do! | 他妈还用你说 |
[19:26] | Yo, what’s with the white people’s clothes? | 你为什么穿着白人佬的衣服 |
[19:29] | Yeah, what’s going on? I can’t even see any nipple. | 对啊 这是怎么回事 连乳头都没露 |
[19:32] | But somehow, it’s worse. | 但却反而比以前更糟 |
[19:34] | Sophie, I want you to see that | 苏菲 我想让你看到 |
[19:37] | we don’t have to be the sexy couple anymore. | 我们不用像以前那样永远都当性感夫妻 |
[19:40] | Anymore? | 什么不用像以前 |
[19:41] | When were you guys the sexy couple? | 你们俩什么时候当过性感夫妻了 |
[19:43] | That weekend you went to Amish Country? | 你们去阿米什人区的那个周末吗 |
[19:46] | Oh, yeah. | 赞啊 |
[19:48] | Do you remember when we did it in that buggy | 还记得我们在那家人面前 |
[19:50] | in front of that family? | 在马车上做爱的画面吗 |
[19:53] | Oh, I bet they wish they had a camera for that. | 我敢赌他们当时一定很想拍下来 |
[19:57] | You want to go do it in the bathroom… | 想跟我去厕所做爱吗 |
[19:59] | buggy-style? | 用马车式 |
[20:02] | Oh, I’m gonna pretend that Jebediah | 我会假装那阿米什哥们 |
[20:05] | is turning away in shame. | 因为羞愧而别过头 没在看 |
[20:07] | I’m gonna pretend he isn’t. | 我会假装他没有 继续盯着看 |
[20:12] | I guess we’re scrubbing down our bathroom later. | 看来晚点我们得给厕所大清洗了 |
[20:15] | We’re heading out. | 我们要走啦 |
[20:16] | It’s almost 8:00. | 马上要八点了 |
[20:18] | Here’s my last bag of cacao. | 这是我最后一包可可粉 |
[20:20] | I can’t do anything with it, | 我处理不掉它 |
[20:22] | not with my cholesterol. | 我胆固醇过高 |
[20:24] | A tiny baggie of cacao? | 一小包可可粉 |
[20:26] | What’re we gonna do with this? | 我们能拿这干嘛 |
[20:28] | Same thing I do with any powder I find: | 跟所有我发现的粉末一样 |
[20:30] | see what all the fuss is about. | 试试它牛逼在哪 |
[20:37] | Not hating it. | 还不赖 |
[20:42] | Holding out on me? | 藏私货吗 |
[20:43] | You skrank skanks! | 你俩街粉小婊子 |
[20:46] | I’m coming in! | 我也要来分一口粉 |