| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:05] | Max, what is all this? | 麦克斯 这些是什么鬼 |
| [00:07] | I thought we were running fancy purchases past each other | 我还以为上次你骂我乱买双层厕纸后 |
| [00:10] | since you yelled at me for splurging on two-ply. | 我们买奢侈品都得互相监督呢 |
| [00:13] | You might as well wipe with dollar bills, your royal heinie. | 何不直接用一元纸钞擦您的皇家屁股呢 |
| [00:17] | This is for a big cake order I got | 这是我为戒暴食匿名会的订单 |
| [00:19] | from Over-Eaters Anonymous. | 买的材料啦 |
| [00:20] | And, like it’s members, it’s a big ‘un. | 这订单就像他们的成员一样 老”大”了 |
| [00:23] | I thought we didn’t take special orders anymore | 我还以为我们现在不接这种特殊订单了 |
| [00:25] | since we opened the dessert bar. | 因为我们开了甜品酒吧 |
| [00:27] | You know, like how girls stop doing mouth stuff | 就像是女孩们得到戒指后 |
| [00:30] | after they get a ring. | 就不干”口活儿”了 |
| [00:32] | Which is why I don’t give girls rings. | 这就是为什么我不给女人们戒指 |
| [00:34] | They’re having a group cheat day and I wanna help them. | 他们想要集体偷吃一天 我想帮忙嘛 |
| [00:38] | It’s my way of giving nothing. | 这是我回”报复”社会的方式 |
| [00:39] | Max, that’s terrible. | 麦克斯 这样太坏了 |
| [00:41] | We can’t enable people that have a real problem. | 我们不能纵容那些真有毛病的人 |
| [00:43] | They’re paying us 1,000 bucks. | 他们会给我们一千块 |
| [00:45] | Like I said, the customer is always right. | 诚如我所说 顾客永远是上帝 |
| [00:48] | You know, with that kind of money, | 有了这笔巨款 |
| [00:49] | we could go from two-ply to wet wipes. | 咱们能从双层厕纸提升到湿纸巾呢 |
| [00:51] | Pfft, slow your two-ply roll, money bags. | 土豪 你双层厕纸的巨轮能缓缓吗 |
| [01:05] | Ugh, there’s no room on our side. | 我们小店那半边都没空位 |
| [01:07] | Han’s side is empty though. | 阿憨这倒挺空 |
| [01:08] | Just like his Little People, Big World viewing parties. | 就像侏儒真人秀的观赏派对一样空 |
| [01:12] | I went once. | 我去看过一次呢 |
| [01:14] | Oh, Han left another note | 阿憨又留了条信息 |
| [01:15] | telling us not to put our stuff on his stuff. | 说不许我们把东西放他的东西上 |
| [01:18] | There’s not enough alcohol in the world | 喝掉全球的酒也无法让我愿意把 |
| [01:20] | to get my stuff on his stuff. | 我的”东西”放他的”东西”上 |
| [01:22] | “Dear girls, how are you? | “亲爱的姑娘们 你们好吗 |
| [01:23] | Been unseasonably hot lately, hasn’t it?” | 最近热得仿佛不像冬天 对吧” |
| [01:26] | He really beats around the bush. | 真是会棒打树丛 不着边际兜圈子 |
| [01:28] | Again, not enough alcohol. | 世上的酒还是不够让他”棒”打我”树丛” |
| [01:30] | “I’d really appreciate | “十分希望你们 |
| [01:31] | if you kept your supplies on your–“ | 可以把自己的存货放在自己那…” |
| [01:32] | Wow, his notes are more boring | 他的留言比你的 |
| [01:34] | than your “Remember when I had money” stories. | “还记得我有钱的那会儿”故事还无聊啊 |
| [01:36] | Come on, Max. We’re slamming Han. | 别这样 麦克斯 咱们是在吐槽阿憨 |
| [01:38] | Let’s stay focused. | 别跑题了 |
| [01:40] | Remember when I had money, though? | 但还记得我有钱的那会儿吗 |
| [01:42] | I’m crafting my response to Han right now. | 我正在动手给阿憨回应呢 |
| [01:45] | I wanna keep it light. | “火”气不用太大 |
| [01:47] | Did I ever tell you | 我跟你说过 |
| [01:48] | we actually had a money room | 当年我家真有储钱间吗 |
| [01:49] | – like in Richie Rich comics? – Yep. | -跟人家漫画里一样 -说过了 |
| [01:52] | Hello, girls. | 你们好啊 姑娘们 |
| [01:54] | Read anything good lately? | 最近有读到什么好文字吗 |
| [01:56] | Perhaps a note on stationary that says, | 比如一张写在便条上 署名有 |
| [01:58] | “From the desk of a jelly bean addict? | “某软心糖豆爱好者敬上”的纸张 |
| [02:01] | Han, if you have something to say, | 阿憨 如果你有话要对我们说 |
| [02:04] | look us in the kneecaps and say it. | 请你直视我们的膝盖 大大方方地说 |
| [02:08] | I smell smoke, and where there’s smoke, | 我闻到了烟味 每次一有烟 |
| [02:10] | there’s usually something of mine burning. | 几乎都是我的东西被烧了 |
| [02:13] | Earl, watch the diner for me. | 厄尔 帮我看着店 |
| [02:15] | Sure thing. | 没问题 |
| [02:17] | Girls, watch the diner for me. | 姑娘们 帮我看着店 |
| [02:20] | I gotta go to the bathroom again. | 我又得去上厕所了 |
| [02:22] | My prostate changes faster than the lineup of The View. | 我的前列腺变化速度比《观点》换主持人还快 |
| [02:22] | 知名脱口秀节目 主持人通常由几名女人组成 该节目已换过超过20位女主持 | |
| [02:27] | – Caroline, watch the diner for me. – Max, watch the diner for me. | -卡洛琳 帮我看着店 -麦克斯 帮我看着店 |
| [02:30] | Jinx, you owe me a soda. | 厄运结 你欠我一瓶饮料 |
| [02:32] | But not from here. | 但不要店里的饮料 |
| [02:35] | Hilar, right? | 好笑吧 |
| [02:36] | Not you. | 不是你好笑 |
| [02:38] | Randy was giving me a Facetime motorboat. | 是兰迪在给我视频蹭大胸[摩托艇]呢 |
| [02:42] | Hey, Caroline. | 卡洛琳你好啊 |
| [02:43] | Arr, it was a bit nippy in there. | 海水海风有些刺骨啊 |
| [02:47] | Ahoy, Captain. | 哟呵 船长你好 |
| [02:48] | Oh, why am I playing along? | 我为什么要配合这个烂哏 |
| [02:51] | Well, we should probably stop having phone sex | 我们不能再视频做爱下去了 |
| [02:53] | ’cause I’m at Pinkberry | 我在粉红莓酸奶店 |
| [02:54] | and I got a lot of decisions to make. | 得做好多决定呢 比如挑什么配料 |
| [02:57] | Well, call me back so your pinkberries | 有空聊 免得你裤裆里粉红莓 |
| [02:58] | don’t become blueberries. | 憋坏憋成铁青蓝莓 |
| [03:02] | Girls, come on. This is a workplace. | 姑娘们 自重 这里可是工作场所 |
| [03:05] | Do you think I can use dish soap on these? | 你们觉得我能用洗碗精洗这玩意吗 |
| [03:10] | You should use gasoline on those. | 你应该用汽油点了它们 |
| [03:13] | So… | 所以… |
| [03:14] | isn’t it about time you and Randy | 你跟兰迪是不是到了 |
| [03:15] | made your relationship official again? | 应该正式宣布复合的时候了 |
| [03:17] | You talk to him more than you talk to me, | 你跟他说话比跟我说话还多 |
| [03:19] | which brings me to my second point: | 这导致了我要说的第二点 |
| [03:21] | I’m hurt. | 我好受伤 |
| [03:23] | We are not in a relationship. | 我跟他才没有在谈恋爱 |
| [03:25] | Or a long-distance relationship. | 也没有远距离恋爱 |
| [03:27] | We are just two people looking for good lighting | 我们只是两个在寻觅完美灯光 |
| [03:30] | for our sex parts. | 照耀我们性器官的狼友 |
| [03:33] | Excuse me. | 不好意思 |
| [03:34] | I’m looking for Earl Washington. | 我想找厄尔·华盛顿 |
| [03:36] | How do you know Earl’s last name? | 你怎么知道厄尔的姓氏 |
| [03:38] | Even his license just says Earl. | 他就连驾照上都只有厄尔呢 |
| [03:41] | You’re not the DirecTV lady, are you? | 你不是直播卫星电视台的人吧 |
| [03:43] | ‘Cause he told us he’s not paying for Starz | 他说你们的付费电视频道 |
| [03:45] | till the channel actually gets some. | 得来点”有料”的内容 他才会付钱 |
| [03:47] | Earl Washington, about 6’2″, | 厄尔·华盛顿 大概1米88 |
| [03:50] | strong as an ox, big bushy afro? | 壮得像条牛 头顶浓密爆炸头 |
| [03:54] | Honey, we shrunk the Earl. | 亲爱的 我们把厄尔缩小了 |
| [03:58] | Um, when was the last time you saw this “Big Earl”? | 你上次见到这位”大厄尔”是什么时候 |
| [04:02] | 1961. We were sweethearts. | 1961年 我们是爱人 |
| [04:05] | But I went to Havana to visit my family | 但我回古巴哈瓦那看家人 |
| [04:07] | and to bring Earl back some cigars. | 顺便想给厄尔带几根古巴雪茄 |
| [04:09] | Then the revolution came and the rest is communism. | 结果我们那里爆发革命 就只剩下共产主义了 |
| [04:12] | Earl’s got people hunting him down across time and space, | 有人跨越时间空间千里寻厄尔 |
| [04:15] | and I can’t get a second date? | 而我连第二次约会都要不到 |
| [04:18] | Earl! | 厄尔 |
| [04:20] | Oh, it’s you. | 果然是你 |
| [04:22] | I recognize that swagger. | 我认出了你那范儿 |
| [04:25] | She does? | 她从哪能看出范儿 |
| [04:27] | Wow, Pilar. | 皮拉尔 |
| [04:29] | You have my cigars? | 我的雪茄带来了吗 |
| [04:33] | He remembers her, but yesterday | 他能记得她 可昨天 |
| [04:35] | he accidentally worked a full shift at Denny’s. | 他还因为记错 在快餐店干了一整天呢 |
| [04:40] | I can’t believe I’m here. | 真不敢相信我能在你面前 |
| [04:42] | You know, I tried to float to you on a porta-potty in 1984, | 1984年的时候 我试着用移动厕所漂来 |
| [04:45] | but it did not work out. | 但这方法大失败 |
| [04:47] | I haven’t been this excited | 我上次这么兴奋至极 |
| [04:48] | since I found out I didn’t work at Denny’s. | 还是我发现原来我不在快餐店打工的时候呢 |
| [04:52] | You are still a fine piece of man, Earl. | 厄尔 依旧还是人中之龙 |
| [04:55] | And you are beau-ti-ful. | 而你依旧美 到 爆 |
| [04:58] | Girl, let’s get outta here. | 美人 咱们走吧 |
| [04:59] | How do you feel about exclusively being on top? | 你对完全享有在”上面”的权利意愿如何 |
| [05:06] | He’s still got it. | 他宝刀未老 |
| [05:08] | Where is he hiding it? | 他的宝刀平常都藏哪了 |
| [05:11] | That is so cute. | 太萌太有爱了 |
| [05:12] | I hope she knows CPR. | 希望她知道怎么做心肺复苏术 |
| [05:17] | Those over-eaters are really getting their money’s worth. | 那帮暴食客的银子花得可真值回票价 |
| [05:20] | Especially since you added the meat layer. | 尤其你还往蛋糕里加了一层肉 |
| [05:23] | It’s gonna compliment the potatoes. | 跟土豆搭配相得益彰 |
| [05:27] | Speaking of complimenting my potatoes, | 说到相得奶涨 |
| [05:29] | listen to what Randy texted. | 你听听兰迪给我的短信 |
| [05:31] | No, thanks. If I liked porn, | 不用了 谢谢 我要喜欢黄书 |
| [05:33] | I wouldn’t have thrown away Sophie and Oleg’s | 我就不会扔掉苏菲跟奥列格的 |
| [05:34] | “We’re Having a Baby” card. | “弄瓦之喜”卡片了 |
| [05:37] | No, this is disturbingly clean. | 不 这短信异常不带任何色情 |
| [05:40] | “Have an hour layover in Newark Airport tomorrow. | “明天会在纽约纽瓦克机场停留一小时 |
| [05:42] | So close and yet so far.” | 但却感觉与你咫尺天涯” |
| [05:45] | What does that mean? | 他这话什么意思 |
| [05:45] | Does he wanna see my boobs or my junk? | 他是想看我的奶子还是下面 |
| [05:48] | Now he’s speaking my language. | 他说的是我的语言 |
| [05:50] | The language of romantic comedy. | 浪漫喜剧语 |
| [05:52] | He wants more. | 他想要更多 |
| [05:54] | My butt? | 要看我的屁股吗 |
| [05:56] | Max, he wants you to meet him at the airport. | 麦克斯 他想跟你在机场见面 |
| [05:58] | Airports are the romantic climax to every great love story. | 机场是所有伟大爱情故事浪漫的高潮 |
| [06:01] | Casablanca, | 《卡萨布兰卡》 |
| [06:03] | Love Actually, | 《真爱至上》 |
| [06:04] | Snakes on a Plane. | 《航班蛇患》 |
| [06:06] | Ah, now I get it. | 现在我懂了 |
| [06:09] | So point to it on my body. | 你就指他想看我身上哪里吧 |
| [06:14] | Hey, girls. | 姑娘们 |
| [06:17] | I’m trying to make the baby laugh. | 我在试着逗我宝宝笑 |
| [06:19] | Here’s one… | 比如这个笑话 |
| [06:20] | Two girls walk into a dessert bar | 两个姑娘走进一家甜品酒吧 |
| [06:23] | and they never leave. | 就卡在里面一辈子了 |
| [06:29] | Ah, see? Nothing. | 你们看 毫无反应 |
| [06:32] | You girls think I’m funny. Right? | 你们俩觉得我很有趣 对吧 |
| [06:34] | You married Oleg, so you have a sense of humor. | 你嫁给了奥列格 肯定很有幽默感啦 |
| [06:39] | I don’t get it. | 没懂 |
| [06:42] | I’m trying to make Barbara laugh, | 我试着让芭芭拉笑 |
| [06:44] | but you know what? I’m like Leno at 10:00. | 但就像杰·雷诺10点的节目一样 |
| [06:44] | 该知名深夜脱口秀主持人曾在2010年时 主持过一档晚上十点播出的节目 收视不佳 | |
| [06:47] | You know? I’m getting nothing. | 观众毫无反应 |
| [06:50] | See? Crickets. | 你们看 静悄悄 |
| [06:52] | Have you tried any got-your-nose material? | 你试过”我偷走你鼻子啦”这招吗 |
| [06:54] | Always makes Caroline laugh. | 每次都能逗卡洛琳笑 |
| [06:57] | Stop! | 别这样 |
| [06:58] | Give me back my nose! | 快把我鼻子还我 |
| [07:02] | You know what? That’s really not funny. | 这个真的不好笑 |
| [07:07] | You know what they say. | 大家都说 |
| [07:08] | That babies that are this age are supposed to laugh, | 像她这么大的婴儿应该要会笑了 |
| [07:11] | and that gets me really worried. | 所以她不笑我很担心 |
| [07:13] | ‘Cause what if Barbara has no idea what’s funny? | 万一芭芭拉不知道什么好笑怎么办 |
| [07:17] | Like a Netflix comedy. | 就像网飞的喜剧一样 |
| [07:20] | Narcos is pretty funny, | 《毒枭》就挺好笑啊 |
| [07:22] | but I guess you had to be there. | 不过可能你得亲身经历才会觉得好笑 |
| [07:24] | Wait a minute. I got something. | 等等 我有一个 |
| [07:29] | Ah, she doesn’t even like fart jokes. | 她连放屁笑话都不喜欢 |
| [07:34] | Neither do we. | 我们也不喜欢 |
| [07:37] | Speak for yourself. | 别随便代表我发言 |
| [07:41] | All right. | 好了 |
| [07:43] | Did you text Randy back? | 你回兰迪短信了吗 |
| [07:45] | I don’t know what to say to him. | 我不知道怎么回他 |
| [07:47] | How does, “New phone, who dis?” sound? | 你觉得回”新手机 这是谁”怎么样 |
| [07:50] | If you were Sally, you would have never met Harry. | 如果你是莎莉 你一定不会遇到哈利 |
| [07:53] | If he wants me to meet him at the airport, | 如果他想要我去机场见他 |
| [07:55] | he’s gonna have to come out and ask me. | 那他就得直接点问我 |
| [07:56] | He wants you to meet him. | 他想你去找他啊 |
| [07:58] | He’s just speaking in the language of romance. | 他只是用浪漫的语言来表达而已 |
| [08:00] | Which you don’t understand | 而你不听懂他的话 |
| [08:01] | ’cause it doesn’t have any burps in it. | 因为这话中没带有恶搞的打嗝声 |
| [08:04] | I know how to interpret these things. | 而我知道怎么翻译这些话 |
| [08:06] | Uh, sorry, but you are horrible at interpreting things. | 不好意思 你翻译话中话的功力超差好吗 |
| [08:09] | You thought when I first said “Hi” to you | 比如你把我当初对你说的”你好” |
| [08:11] | it meant I wanted you to move in with me for six years. | 误解为邀请你搬来跟我同住六年 |
| [08:15] | Sorry if you had me at “Hello”. | 你对我问好时 已掳获我心 是我的错 |
| [08:22] | There she is 18 hours later. | 18小时的苦工后 宝贝完工 |
| [08:24] | Mama’s greatest accomplishment: | 老娘此生最大的成就 |
| [08:26] | Maple vanilla rum cake | 枫糖香草朗姆蛋糕 |
| [08:27] | with a raspberry cream cheese filling | 内含覆盆子奶油奶酪夹心 |
| [08:29] | and a white chocolate crumble. | 与白巧克力碎 |
| [08:31] | Also, there’s a ham in it. | 另外 里面还有火腿 |
| [08:32] | Can you have a contact heart attack | 人能光凭看着某样东西 |
| [08:34] | from looking at something? | 就得到心脏病吗 |
| [08:35] | ‘Cause my left arm is tingly. | 我的左臂现在有点酸麻感 |
| [08:38] | Let’s load this monster in the back. | 把这个”大家伙塞进后面”吧 |
| [08:40] | How many times have I said that? | 这句话我不知道说过多少次了 |
| [08:43] | Ooh, can I get a hunk of that ham? | 我能吃一片那个火腿吗 |
| [08:44] | No! | 不许 |
| [08:47] | Oh, there’s no room on our side. | 我们那边没位置放了 |
| [08:49] | Oh, my God, Max, why is this so heavy? | 天啊 麦克斯 这怎么那么重 |
| [08:52] | That’s gonna be the layer of hot dogs. | 罪魁祸首肯定是里面那层热狗 |
| [08:54] | Let’s just put it on Han’s side. | 就放阿憨那半边吧 |
| [08:56] | Move his note. I’ll burn it later. | 先把纸条移开 我等会再烧了 |
| [08:58] | Aw, he got this one notarized. | 这张还是公证过的呢 |
| [09:01] | And he’s a notary. | 他还是一名公证员 |
| [09:03] | There’s a lot of sides to that square. | 他这人有许多面 |
| [09:08] | So… | 所以呢 |
| [09:08] | I’ve been thinking about your airport outfit. | 我一直在想你去机场穿什么 |
| [09:11] | You’re not gonna like this, but I think it may be time | 你可能会不喜欢 但我觉得是时候 |
| [09:13] | for you got a third shirt. | 你买第三件衬衫了 |
| [09:15] | You’re not gonna like this. | 你应该也不喜欢这句话 |
| [09:16] | I think it’s time for you to get a second friend. | 但我觉得是时候你去结识第二个朋友了 |
| [09:19] | You haven’t seen Randy in six months. | 你都六个月没见到兰迪了 |
| [09:21] | I mean, you’ve seen parts of him on your phone, | 虽然你在手机上见过兰迪的部分”身体” |
| [09:23] | but you haven’t seen the whole. | 但你都没见到完整的他 |
| [09:25] | Oh, I’ve seen the hole. | 我有见到他菊花[完整]啊 |
| [09:27] | He fell getting out of the shower. | 他出浴的时候滑倒了 |
| [09:29] | What is wrong with you? | 你是闹哪样啊 |
| [09:30] | I know you’re crazy about him. | 我知道你明明就很爱他 |
| [09:31] | I am, but what if he doesn’t want me to come? | 是啊 可是万一他不想我去怎么办 |
| [09:34] | What if I get there and I’m like, “Hey,” | 万一我到了现场 跟他说”嘿嘿” |
| [09:37] | and he’s like, “Uh, hey…” | 结果他说… “那啥…” |
| [09:39] | I don’t wanna be embarrassed. | 我不想难为情啊 |
| [09:41] | Then don’t say “Hey” like that ever. | 那就请你这辈子都别这么说”嘿” |
| [09:44] | And since when do you care about being embarrassed? | 而且你什么时候开始介意难为情这种事了 |
| [09:47] | Your raincoat is a trash bag. | 你的雨衣是个垃圾袋 |
| [09:49] | Ugh, it matches my duct tape shoes. | 它跟我的胶带鞋子很配啊 |
| [09:53] | I am not going to the airport. | 我才不要去机场 |
| [09:56] | Uh, sure, Pilar. | 没问题 皮拉尔 |
| [09:58] | It’s on like Donkey Kong. | 就像大金刚游戏一样 “杠杠”地 |
| [10:01] | How’s it going with Pilar? | 跟皮拉尔怎么样啦 |
| [10:03] | You crazy kids still having fun? | 你们俩疯狂的孩子玩得开心吗 |
| [10:05] | She’s wearing me out. | 她快把我累垮了 |
| [10:07] | Well, at least you have somebody. | 至少你有个人啊 |
| [10:10] | Whoa, simmer down, Lonely Island. | 冷静啊 寂寞孤岛[乐队名] |
| [10:14] | Earl, what’s going on? | 厄尔 怎么回事 |
| [10:15] | She wants to see everything she’s missed | 她想看她这五十年来 |
| [10:17] | in the last 50 years. | 错过的一切 |
| [10:19] | Now she wants to go to Disney World. | 现在她还要去迪士尼乐园 |
| [10:21] | You know what, Earl? You need to breathe. | 厄尔 你需要喘口气 |
| [10:23] | How about we go for one of those invigorating walks we take | 要不我们一起做你腿部血液不循环时 |
| [10:26] | whenever your leg blood isn’t moving? | 都会做的健走吧 |
| [10:29] | Do you need your Walker, Earl? | 需要你的拐杖[走路]吗 厄尔 |
| [10:30] | Of course I do. | 当然啦 |
| [10:33] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [10:38] | Just put it right over– | 就直接放在… |
| [10:41] | That admittedly gorgeous cake | 无可否认这蛋糕看上去很赞 |
| [10:43] | is not the property of the Williamsburg Diner. | 但它不是威廉斯堡餐厅的所有物 |
| [10:46] | I’m losing interest real fast here Han. | 我没兴趣继续抱着这玩意 |
| [10:48] | Where am I putting this box? | 我该放哪儿 |
| [10:49] | I’m moving the cake. | 我去把蛋糕搬走 |
| [10:51] | You play with the bull, you get the Han. | 人若犯憨 憨必犯人 |
| [10:55] | I guess CrossFit failed me again today. | 看来我的混合健身课今天又让我失望了 |
| [10:55] | 近年来风靡全球的健身体能体系 有氧运动结合重量训练的高强度全身练习 | |
| [10:57] | You went once and you passed out. | 你就去了一次 还晕了过去 |
| [10:58] | I didn’t hydrate. | 那是因为缺水 |
| [11:04] | Oh, boy. | 瓜娃子 |
| [11:06] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [11:08] | Is that a hot dog? | 那是一根热狗吗 |
| [11:10] | Wake up, Han. Wake up. | 快醒醒 阿憨 快醒醒 |
| [11:12] | You’re having a terrible dream | 你只是在做一个很可怕的梦 |
| [11:14] | where you destroyed something very important to the girls | 梦见自己毁掉了那俩恶女很重要的东西 |
| [11:17] | and they’re going to kill you. | 她们绝对会弄死你的 |
| [11:19] | Yeah, we’re still here. | 是的 我们还在案发现场 |
| [11:20] | You dropped the cake. This is happening. | 你把蛋糕弄掉了 这事真发生了 |
| [11:23] | What have I done? | 我都干了什么 |
| [11:27] | Looks like someone got themselves in a little jam. | 看来有人就”酱”自己作”贱”自缚 |
| [11:31] | Mmm, raspberry. | 覆盆子果酱 |
| [11:32] | Stop licking things. | 别舔了 |
| [11:34] | We need to put this back together. | 我们得把蛋糕恢复原样 |
| [11:36] | Yes, yes, this is working. | 就这样 可以复原 |
| [11:39] | No one will be the wiser. | 没人会发现的 |
| [11:41] | We’ll just frost over the crime. | 我们只需在外表上一层糖霜 |
| [11:44] | Why is there a ham? | 怎么还会有火腿 |
| [11:46] | This cake makes no sense! | 这蛋糕太莫名其妙了 |
| [11:49] | Get up. | 给我起来 |
| [11:50] | You’re making a fool of yourself. | 你真是丢人现眼 |
| [11:52] | And that’s coming from a guy | 连我这个早些时候 |
| [11:53] | who burnt his nuts on a hand dryer earlier. | 被烘手机烫到蛋蛋的人都觉得你丢人 |
| [11:57] | Tell me what to do. | 那你告诉我该怎么办 |
| [12:01] | Relax. | 淡定 |
| [12:03] | This cake had no family, | 这个蛋糕没有家人 |
| [12:05] | no friends, no dental records. | 没有朋友 也没有牙科记录 |
| [12:08] | I’ve done this before. | 这种事我有经验 |
| [12:10] | With other cakes, of course. | 当然我说的是处理别的”蛋糕” |
| [12:13] | I’m so scared. | 人家好怕怕 |
| [12:19] | Earl is really in a bad way over Pilar. | 皮拉尔真的让厄尔处于两难的地步 |
| [12:22] | I’ve never seen him that confused. | 我从来没看见他如此困惑 |
| [12:24] | Well, then you’ve never watched him button a shirt. | 那你肯定没见过他系衣服扣子的时候 |
| [12:27] | – Where’s the cake? – The cake? | -蛋糕在哪儿 -蛋糕吗 |
| [12:29] | We put it right here. | 我们明明就放在这儿啊 |
| [12:31] | It couldn’t have grown little legs and walked away. | 它不可能长出小脚 然后自己跑掉 |
| [12:34] | Little legs? | 小脚 |
| [12:35] | Han! | 阿憨 |
| [12:40] | Oleg, have you seen our cake? | 奥列格 你有见过我们的蛋糕吗 |
| [12:42] | I see a lot of cakes. | 我见过很多蛋糕 |
| [12:43] | This is New York City. Cakes up the wazoo. | 这里是纽约城 蛋糕多得要死 |
| [12:46] | Pancakes, baby cakes, patty cakes. | 薄饼”蛋糕” 小宝贝”蛋糕” 拍手”蛋糕” |
| [12:48] | They should change the name to New Cake City. | 其实真应该改名叫纽蛋城 |
| [12:51] | He knows something. | 他肯定知道什么 |
| [12:52] | Not much, but something. | 虽然不多 但多少知道一些 |
| [12:54] | But that is a pretty great name for New York. | 但这名字还真挺适合纽约的 |
| [12:58] | Earl, have you seen a man-sized cake | 厄尔 你有看见蛋糕大小的人 |
| [13:00] | being carried by a cake-sized man? | 抬着一个人形大小的蛋糕吗 |
| [13:03] | I have other stuff on my mind. | 我有自己的事要烦 |
| [13:04] | I gotta tell Pilar I don’t wanna go to Disney World | 我得告诉皮拉尔我不想去迪士尼乐园 |
| [13:07] | and Burning Man’s off too. | 火人节我也不想去了 |
| [13:09] | Hello, girls. | 姑娘们 |
| [13:10] | I’ve been thinking of adding a chicken leg to the shift meal. | 我在想工作餐要不要给你们加个鸡腿 |
| [13:14] | Thoughts? | 意下如何啊 |
| [13:15] | Where’d you hide our cake? | 你把我们的蛋糕藏哪儿了 |
| [13:17] | With the rest of your body? | 跟你身体其余部分藏在一起吗 |
| [13:20] | Who crapped in your coffee? | 你的咖啡被人拉屎了吗 这么炸毛 |
| [13:23] | First I’m gonna say: | 首先我要说 |
| [13:24] | That’s a strong yes on the chicken leg. | 强烈赞成工作餐加鸡腿 |
| [13:26] | Now, where’s my maple vanilla cake with hot dog filling? | 现在快说我的枫糖香草夹热狗蛋糕去哪儿了 |
| [13:29] | We put it on your side of the shelf and now it’s gone. | 我们放在你那半边的台子上 现在不见了 |
| [13:32] | I have no idea what you’re talking about. | 我完全不知道你们在说什么 |
| [13:35] | Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to cake a phone call. | 抱歉失陪了 我要去”蛋”个电话 |
| [13:38] | I mean, make a phone cake. | 我是说 打个电”糕” |
| [13:41] | Search him, Max. | 搜他身 麦克斯 |
| [13:42] | All the way down to his Underoos. | 连他的卡通小内裤都要搜 |
| [13:44] | Check my Underoos. | 来搜我的小裤裤啊 |
| [13:46] | There’s something sweet in there, | 里面兜着美味可口的东西 |
| [13:47] | but it’s not cake. | 但肯定不是蛋糕 |
| [13:50] | You’ve got nothing on me. | 你们没有证据 |
| [13:51] | Oleg, tell them I haven’t seen their cake. | 奥列格 告诉她们我没见过她们的蛋糕 |
| [13:54] | Right, bro? | 对吧 好兄弟 |
| [13:55] | Cake? What cake? I see a lot of cakes. | 蛋糕 什么蛋糕 我见过很多蛋糕 |
| [13:57] | This is New York City. Cakes up the wazoo. | 这里是纽约城 蛋糕多得要死 |
| [13:59] | patty cakes, pancakes, baby cake. | 薄饼”蛋糕” 小宝贝”蛋糕” 拍手”蛋糕” |
| [14:00] | – They should name the city, uh– – New Cake City. | -其实真应该改名叫… -纽蛋城 |
| [14:02] | Yeah, we got it. | 我们知道了 |
| [14:04] | Maybe Han’s telling the truth. | 或许阿憨说的是实话 |
| [14:06] | Do you think one of those over-eaters | 你觉得有没有可能其中一名暴食客 |
| [14:08] | could have snuck in here without us knowing? | 趁我们不注意偷偷溜进来吃掉了 |
| [14:10] | You saw how cramped it is back there. | 你也看到后面地方有多狭窄 |
| [14:11] | This morning I had to go in one boob at a time. | 今天早上我想进来还得先进左奶再进右奶 |
| [14:14] | Where could it be? | 那能去哪儿呢 |
| [14:18] | Just ’cause your keys were in there one time. | 钥匙丢在里面过一次而已 需要这样吗 |
| [14:24] | Hey, everybody. | 大家安安 |
| [14:25] | We’re here. | 我们来啦 |
| [14:27] | Yeah, me and the ice queen. | 没错 我和冰山妹 |
| [14:30] | You know, if she doesn’t laugh soon, | 如果她还不会笑 |
| [14:32] | people are gonna think she’s German. | 人们就要以为她是德国人了 |
| [14:38] | She’s getting real monster truck rally | 她可以用那台巨型婴儿车 |
| [14:40] | with that carriage. | 参加疯狂大脚赛车了 |
| [14:42] | Well, I guess I’m gonna have to make another cake. | 看来我只能再做一个蛋糕了 |
| [14:44] | I have 60 “Just checking in” voicemails on my phone | 我手机收到了60则”随口问问”的语音留言 |
| [14:47] | asking about it. | 都在问问问 |
| [14:48] | Oh, 61. | 61则了 |
| [14:50] | But you have to go meet Randy at the airport. | 可你得去机场见兰迪啊 |
| [14:51] | I’m not going to the airport. | 我才不去机场 |
| [14:53] | Besides, I have too many enemies at Hudson News. | 再说了 我在机场便利店有太多仇家 |
| [14:59] | This is the second best hot dog cake I’ve ever had. | 这是我吃过第二好吃的热狗蛋糕 |
| [15:04] | I don’t want to jump to conclusions, | 我不想急着下结论 |
| [15:05] | but I think that’s our hot dog cake. | 但我觉得那是我们的热狗蛋糕 |
| [15:07] | Sophie, where did you get that? | 苏菲 这蛋糕哪来的 |
| [15:09] | Oleg. | 奥列格给的 |
| [15:10] | Can you believe he buried this? | 想不到他会把这玩意埋蛋糕里吧 |
| [15:13] | Good thing that I can dig. | 幸好我善于发掘 |
| [15:16] | It was Han. If it makes you feel any better, | 是阿憨干的 如果能让你们好过点 |
| [15:18] | he cried as we shoveled it into a bucket. | 我们把蛋糕铲进桶里时 他一直在哭 |
| [15:21] | Han! | 阿憨 |
| [15:22] | Get out here! | 快滚出来 |
| [15:23] | We know you killed our cake. | 我们知道你毁了我们的蛋糕 |
| [15:24] | You sold me out? | 你居然出卖我 |
| [15:27] | I want my 48.50 back, you stool pigeon. | 把我的48块5还给我 你个告密者 |
| [15:30] | I can’t bury a cake | 我做不到埋个蛋糕 |
| [15:31] | and not bring some home for my wife. | 却不拿一点回家给我老婆吃 |
| [15:34] | You heard my vows. | 我的结婚誓词你是知道的啊 |
| [15:36] | This is your fault | 这都是你们的错 |
| [15:37] | for not paying attention to my notes. | 谁让你们不看我的留言 |
| [15:40] | Prepare to meet your maker, Han. | 准备去见上帝[制造者]吧 阿憨 |
| [15:41] | Which I’m assuming is Mattel. | 我猜你的制造者应该是芭比娃娃制造商 |
| [15:43] | Please don’t kill me. | 求你们放我一条生路 |
| [15:45] | I have so much… A lot… | 我上有…下有… |
| [15:48] | well, some things to live for. | 反正就是有值得活下去的理由啦 |
| [15:53] | Did you hear that? | 你们听见了吗 |
| [15:54] | Ah, the girls scared Han, | 她们俩吓唬阿憨 |
| [15:56] | and it made Barbara laugh. | 让芭芭拉发笑了 |
| [15:58] | Ah, I guess she likes to hear other babies in danger. | 我猜她喜欢听到别的宝宝倒霉 |
| [16:03] | That’s my girl. | 果然是我的女儿 |
| [16:06] | Hi, Earl. | 厄尔 |
| [16:07] | I am excited to fly to Florida instead of floating there | 我好高兴能坐飞机去佛罗里达 而不是抱着 |
| [16:11] | on the door of a ’57 Chevy. | 雪佛兰老爷车的门漂过去 |
| [16:14] | Earl, is there anything you wanna tell Pilar | 厄尔 你有什么话想跟皮拉尔说吗 |
| [16:16] | about your trip to Disney World? | 关于你们的迪士尼之旅的事 |
| [16:18] | Yeah, I, uh… | 有 我… |
| [16:22] | got the park hopper. | 买了公园套票 |
| [16:23] | It’s two parks for the price of three. | 花三个公园的钱 却只能进两个公园 |
| [16:26] | Earl? | 厄尔 |
| [16:28] | Oh, hell. | 死就死吧 |
| [16:30] | Uh, Pilar… | 皮拉尔 |
| [16:33] | I don’t wanna got Disney World. | 我不想去迪士尼乐园 |
| [16:34] | I didn’t even like The Lion King. | 我甚至不喜欢《狮子王》 |
| [16:36] | Too much Africa stuff. | 非洲元素太多了 |
| [16:38] | I honestly don’t know how to process | 我真的不知道该怎么消化 |
| [16:40] | somebody not liking The Lion King. | 居然有人不喜欢《狮子王》这件事 |
| [16:43] | Look, Pilar, I’ve drank it all, | 听着 皮拉尔 该喝的酒我全喝了 |
| [16:45] | I’ve smoked it all, I’ve done it all. | 该抽的我也全抽了 该干的事也全干了 |
| [16:48] | You are just starting out on your ride. | 而你才开始你的旅程 |
| [16:50] | I don’t wanna slow you down. | 我不想拖慢你的脚步 |
| [16:53] | I see. | 我明白 |
| [16:54] | This is why I’m not going to the airport. | 这就是为什么我不想去机场 |
| [16:57] | She’s probably so embarrassed right now. | 她现在肯定觉得难为情 |
| [17:00] | You’d think I’d be embarrassed | 你觉得我肯定会难为情 |
| [17:01] | because I came all this way here for you, | 因为我大老远跑来找你 你却拒绝我 |
| [17:03] | but I don’t regret it. | 但我不后悔 |
| [17:05] | Uh, excuse me? | 不好意思 |
| [17:08] | Can I get some mustard for this cake? | 能给我上点黄芥末配蛋糕吃吗 |
| [17:11] | Earl, if I didn’t come, | 厄尔 如果我不来找你 |
| [17:13] | I’d always have wondered what could have been. | 我就会一直想 我们之间的各种可能性 |
| [17:15] | I am glad you came. | 我很开心你能来 |
| [17:18] | Showed me my heart can take a lot. | 让我知道 我这颗心脏承受力很强 |
| [17:21] | Whoever had this one before me | 不管之前这颗心脏的主人是谁 |
| [17:23] | must have been a jogger. | 那人一个定是个慢跑者 |
| [17:25] | It was great seeing you, Earl. | 很高兴见到你 厄尔 |
| [17:29] | Now, I’m gonna go get my Goofy on. | 我要去振翅”高飞”了 |
| [17:32] | Uh, Pilar, | 皮拉尔 |
| [17:34] | can I catch a ride with you to the airport? | 我能搭你的便车去机场吗 |
| [17:36] | I gotta meet a guy. | 我要去找个男人 |
| [17:37] | Yeah, I guess I gotta meet a guy too. | 对啊 我猜我也该去找个男人了 |
| [17:41] | Caroline… | 卡洛琳 |
| [17:42] | do you wanna come? | 你要一起吗 |
| [17:44] | I thought you’d never ask. | 我还以为你不会叫上我呢 |
| [17:46] | So, should we share a cab? | 那我们是同搭一辆车吗 |
| [17:48] | You know, in Cuba, I shared an apartment with a horse. | 在古巴 我曾跟一匹马同住一间公寓 |
| [17:52] | Well, that’s just weird. | 那也太”怪”了吧 |
| [17:55] | Bye, Earl. | 再见 厄尔 |
| [17:56] | Aw, he’s asleep. | 他睡着了 |
| [18:02] | Yep, he’s asleep. | 没错 他是睡着了 |
| [18:07] | Caroline, hurry up. | 卡洛琳 快点 |
| [18:09] | Now we’re gonna be late. | 我们要赶不上了 |
| [18:10] | Ugh, there were plenty of people | 那里明明有很多人 |
| [18:11] | who could have helped that guy back into his wheelchair. | 可以扶那个人坐回他的轮椅 |
| [18:14] | All right, Randy’s last flight landed at terminal four, | 好啦 兰迪上一班飞机在第四航站楼降落 |
| [18:17] | and his next flight is out of terminal six. | 他下一班飞机在第六航站楼 |
| [18:19] | He should be here any second. | 他应该随时会到这里 |
| [18:20] | You look beautiful. | 你看起来真美 |
| [18:22] | You sure? | 是咩 |
| [18:23] | Do I have anything in my teeth? | 我牙齿上有东西吗 |
| [18:26] | Just the candy corn you use as a molar. | 只有你拿来当臼齿的玉米糖 |
| [18:30] | There he is! | 他在那儿 |
| [18:32] | Randy! | 兰迪 |
| [18:36] | Sorry, I’m not sure I’ll ever get to have | 抱歉 我不确定我有生之年会不会 |
| [18:37] | my own airport moment. | 有自己的机场时刻 |
| [18:39] | Caroline, what’re you doing here? | 卡洛琳 你在这里干什么 |
| [18:43] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
| [18:46] | Sir, I’m gonna need you to look deep into my eyes | 先生 我需要你直勾勾地看着我的眼睛 |
| [18:49] | while I frisk you. | 因为我要搜你身了 |
| [18:53] | And I’m gonna need you to take off that shirt. | 麻烦你先把上衣脱了 |
| [18:56] | This actually kind of happens to me a lot. | 这要求对我来说是家常便饭 |
| [18:59] | Even in libraries. | 甚至进图书馆也要脱 |
| [19:04] | Should I take my shirt off too? | 我的上衣也要脱吗 |
| [19:07] | No, you’re in an airport, not a McDonald’s. | 不必 你是在机场 不是在麦当劳打野战 |
| [19:11] | Max, I– | 麦克斯 |
| [19:12] | I didn’t think you were actually coming to see me. | 我想不到你真的会来见我 |
| [19:14] | Well, ’cause you didn’t actually ask. | 因为你也没有真的问我啊 |
| [19:17] | You look great. | 你看起来真不错 |
| [19:19] | Easy on the nipples there, Sheryl. | 奶头敏感 麻烦轻点好吗 |
| [19:22] | All right, you’re good. | 好了 你可以通过了 |
| [19:25] | No need to put your shirt back on, though. | 虽然没必要把上衣穿上 |
| [19:34] | You’re good. | 你不用脱 |
| [19:45] | I’m really happy you came. | 你能来我真的很开心 |
| [19:47] | You are? | 真的吗 |
| [19:48] | Then why didn’t you just ask me? | 那你为什么不直接找我来 |
| [19:52] | I guess I was worried you’d say no, | 可能我担心你会拒绝 |
| [19:54] | and I’d be embarrassed. | 然后我会难为情吧 |
| [19:55] | I was worried you didn’t want me to come | 我还担心你不想我来 |
| [19:56] | and then I’d be embarrassed. | 然后我来了 我会难为情呢 |
| [19:59] | Classic misunderstanding. | 经典的浪漫误会 |
| [20:02] | Look, I-I know we’re not supposed to get attached, but… | 我知道我们不该再爱上对方 可… |
| [20:04] | Say it. | 大胆说出来 |
| [20:07] | I want something more. | 我想更近一步 |
| [20:09] | I want a relationship. | 我想跟你交往 |
| [20:11] | Say it back. | 大胆回应他 |
| [20:15] | I wouldn’t hate that. | 我没意见 |
| [20:17] | Close enough. | 差不多了 |
| [20:20] | So we’re doing this? | 做戏要做全套吗 |
| [20:22] | Because if not, I gotta get back to Sheryl. | 因为如果不做 我就得回到安检员的怀抱 |
| [20:25] | She still has my shoes. | 我的鞋还在她那儿呢 |
| [20:27] | Uh, yeah, I think we have to. | 来吧 不做不行啊 |
| [20:31] | I mean, this is all Caroline has. | 卡洛琳就指着看这一幕了 |
| [20:37] | Oh, it’s so beautiful. | 这一幕太美了 |
| [20:45] | Oh, come on, people. | 拜托 冷漠的人们 |
| [20:46] | You heard her. This is all I have. | 你们也听到了 满足一下我的意淫啊 |