时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:02] | Hey, Earl. | 厄尔 |
[00:03] | It’s the brand new us in brand new gently used outfits. | 全新的我们穿着别人没怎么穿过的二手衣 |
[00:08] | The pit stains are vintage. | 污渍走得可是复古风呢 |
[00:11] | I dug mine out of a dumpster. | 我这身是从垃圾桶翻出来的 |
[00:13] | It wasn’t even touching the diaper. | 完全没有接触到任何尿布的呢 |
[00:16] | I’m not used to seeing you girls in clothes. | 我看你们俩穿[自己]衣服好不习惯 |
[00:19] | Things just sound creepier when you’re old. | 老头子说这话 听起来更变态 |
[00:23] | As new part owners of the diner, | 作为餐厅的新合伙人 |
[00:25] | we’re making improvements. | 我们要作出改进 |
[00:26] | Heh, not in the food or decor | 当然不是改进食物或装修 |
[00:28] | ’cause LOL. | 因为 呵呵你懂的 |
[00:30] | But we’re just gonna look better. | 但改进的是我们 要更美 |
[00:35] | Oleg, did you hear the news? | 奥列格 你听说了吗 |
[00:36] | We’re not wearing uniforms anymore. | 我们以后不穿制服上班啦 |
[00:38] | Cool. | 好啊 |
[00:39] | Let’s do it. | 那就不穿了 |
[00:43] | Just say the word. | 只要一句话 |
[00:45] | The underwear is tear-away too. | 内裤也是一撕就掉哦 |
[00:48] | Don’t say words. | 千万别说话 |
[00:52] | Oh, God! | 天啊 |
[00:53] | I think I just looked into the eye of the tiger. | 我觉得我仿佛已经看到了他的”马眼”了 |
[00:56] | Oh, it’s my roach friend, Pierre. | 我的蟑螂朋友皮埃尔来了 |
[00:59] | Bonjour, Pierre. | 你好[法语] 皮埃尔 |
[01:01] | Au revoir, Pierre. | 再见[法语] 皮埃尔 |
[01:06] | Stop, drop, and roll! | 停下 趴下 打滚 |
[01:09] | You’re on fire. | 你身上着火了 |
[01:09] | You’re on fire. | 你身上着火了 |
[01:11] | Now scissor a little. It can’t hurt. | 来 磨两下豆腐 磨磨不碍事儿 |
[01:25] | Okay, now that no one can see Oleg’s nipples, | 好了 现在奥列格的奶头遮起来了 |
[01:29] | let’s start. | 我们开始吧 |
[01:30] | As you know, Max and I are part owners of the diner. | 你们也知道 我和麦克斯是这家餐厅的合伙人 |
[01:33] | You been telling us every damn day | 你每一天都会告诉我们一遍 |
[01:34] | like a skinny cuckoo clock. | 就像瘦版的布谷报时钟 |
[01:37] | Which reminds me, | 这倒提醒我 |
[01:39] | I timed my medication to it. | 根据你报时 我到该吃药的时间了 |
[01:42] | Pill me, Earl. | 我也”药” 厄尔 |
[01:44] | What was that? | 那是什么你就吃 |
[01:46] | I don’t know. | 我不知道啊 |
[01:47] | Like to keep my body guessing. | 我喜欢让我的身体玩猜猜看 |
[01:49] | So what’s this meeting for? | 开会到底要干嘛 |
[01:51] | The baby’s almost here | 宝宝快出生了 |
[01:52] | and I still have a bunch of new father stuff to do: | 我还有很多新手爸爸该干的事没干呢 |
[01:54] | build a crib; | 造一张婴儿床 |
[01:55] | get rid of 60 yards of butt-beads. | 扔掉总长55米的各式肛门拉珠 |
[01:59] | You can build a crib? | 你还会造婴儿床啊 |
[02:02] | Anyway, the big change we’re talking about | 总而言之 我们讨论的”大改变” |
[02:04] | is changing right now. | 现在正在换衣服呢 |
[02:06] | Han? | 阿憨 |
[02:07] | I don’t want to! | 人家不想穿这个啦 |
[02:09] | Okay, fine. | 好吧好吧 |
[02:20] | Those shorts look like a cheap hotel, | 这短裤看着就像廉价酒店 |
[02:22] | no ballroom. | 没有舞厅[“蛋”巢] |
[02:25] | I already lost my diner. | 我已经失去我的餐厅了 |
[02:26] | Haven’t I been shamed enough? | 被羞辱得还不够吗 |
[02:28] | Thanks for reminding me. Caroline? | 多谢提醒 卡洛琳 |
[02:35] | Now you have. | 现在够了 |
[02:36] | And this is what you get for gambling on ladies’ tennis | 这就是你的下场 谁让你赌女子网球 |
[02:39] | and owing us $25,000. | 还欠我们2万5啊 |
[02:42] | You look like Bob’s “little” boy. | 你看起来像鲍勃的”小”儿子 |
[02:42] | “鲍勃的大儿子”是美国一家美式连锁餐厅 汽车通道点餐是对着人偶的嘴 | |
[02:46] | Should we order directly into your mouth? | 我们该直接往你嘴里点餐吗 |
[02:52] | Han, since the diner is now owner operated, | 阿憨 现在这家餐厅是合伙人经营制 |
[02:55] | if we have to wait on tables, so do you. | 如果我们得干活 那你也一样 |
[02:57] | You’re gonna cover our shifts because our other business, | 我们不在你就得顶替我们 因为我们另一家店 |
[03:00] | the dessert bar, is opening in two days. | 甜品酒吧 还有两天就开业了 |
[03:02] | Did you say you own a dessert bar? | 你刚是不是提到你有一家甜品酒吧 |
[03:04] | Huh… pill time. | 吃药时间又到了 |
[03:07] | I don’t know why I can’t catch a break from you two. | 真不知道我上辈子欠了你们多少债 |
[03:10] | I had to put up with Max’s heartbreak | 麦克斯和洛城男友兰迪分手 |
[03:12] | over her LA boyfriend Randy for months. | 我默默忍受了她好几个月心碎不想干活 |
[03:14] | It was more indulgent than Beyonce’s “Lemonade.” | 这比碧昂斯的《柠檬特调》还要宽容啊 |
[03:14] | 这部电影由同名专辑的12歌串联 前部分控诉老公出轨偷情 后部分原谅他 | |
[03:18] | – How dare you? – She’s a queen. | -好大的胆子 -她可是女王大人 |
[03:22] | The name “Randy” is off-limits in this diner, Han. | 兰迪这个名字在餐厅里是禁忌 阿憨 |
[03:25] | Like ambition or fresh milk. | 雄心壮志和新鲜牛奶也是 |
[03:27] | Girls, while you have us trapped here, | 姑娘们 你们逼我们出席的同时 |
[03:30] | what the hell is a dessert bar? | 我想问甜品酒吧到底是什么玩意 |
[03:33] | Is it cake with alcohol in it? | 是蛋糕里面有酒 |
[03:35] | Or alcohol with cake? | 还是酒配蛋糕啊 |
[03:36] | ‘Cause either way, nobody wants to make love | 因为无论哪种 没人会在 |
[03:39] | after eating a big hunk of pie. | 吃完一大块馅饼后 还想做爱 |
[03:42] | Earl, everybody understands the concept. | 厄尔 大家都懂这个概念 |
[03:46] | I don’t get the dessert bar thing either. | 我也搞不懂这甜品酒吧 |
[03:48] | Who wants to hear from a human mustard packet? | 谁想听人体黄芥末酱包的意见啊 |
[03:52] | Randy, Randy, Randy. Zing! | 兰迪 兰迪 兰迪 咬我啊 |
[03:58] | Damn, baby got back. | 靠 小矮子有辣臀啊 |
[04:00] | Thanks for the input, but I think I know what I’m doing. | 多谢你们的意见 但我知道我在做什么 |
[04:03] | I went to Wharton. | 我可是沃顿毕业的 |
[04:05] | Wharton. | 提到沃顿了 |
[04:06] | That’s my last pill. | 该吃最后一片药了 |
[04:10] | Hey, every-baby! | 各位宝宝安安 |
[04:14] | Yeah, it’s my due date. | 没错 预产期到了 |
[04:17] | This baby is taking longer to come out | 等这个宝宝出来的时间比 |
[04:19] | than a Catholic from Indiana. | 印第安纳州的天主教徒出柜的时间还要久 |
[04:23] | Sophie, do you feel anything? | 苏菲 你有感觉到什么了吗 |
[04:26] | I mean, besides the vibrating panties I got you? | 除了我送给你的震动内裤之外的感觉 |
[04:30] | Oh, is that what that sound is? | 原来怪声音是那个啊 |
[04:31] | I thought a bee got in here. | 我还以为店里飞进一只蜜蜂呢 |
[04:33] | Well, I’ll be in my booth | 我去我的专座 |
[04:35] | waiting for my baby. | 等待我宝宝的降临 |
[04:45] | Welcome to the Williamsburg Diner. | 欢迎来到威廉斯堡餐厅 |
[04:49] | I’ll be your waiter, Han. | 我是您的服务员 阿憨 |
[04:52] | Who’s the new girl? | 这个新妞是谁啊 |
[04:55] | I don’t like her. | 我不喜欢她 |
[05:01] | None of these bartenders have dessert bar experience. | 这些酒保全都没有甜品酒吧的工作经验 |
[05:05] | I guess that’s because we made it up. | 我猜那是因为这种酒吧是我们瞎编的 |
[05:07] | That one guy got drunk at the M&M’s store. | 有个家伙在巧克力豆专卖店喝醉过 |
[05:10] | That’s in the ballpark. | 能勉强搭上边吧 |
[05:11] | You just like him ’cause he gave you candy. | 你喜欢他是因为他给你糖果了 |
[05:14] | It did not hurt. | 试试又不会死 |
[05:18] | Hey. I’m here for the bartender job. | 你好 我是来应聘酒保工作的 |
[05:21] | Well, you’re not holding your penis, | 你手里没有提着你的”鸟” |
[05:22] | so you’re doing better than the last guy. | 这已说明你比上一个好多了 |
[05:25] | Full disclosure: that guy’s still in the running. | 完全公开原则 那家伙还在候选名单 |
[05:28] | Mine would be here, but he gets nervous at interviews. | 我也想露鸟 但我的鸟面试时会紧张 |
[05:32] | He’s funny. | 他好有趣 |
[05:33] | He’s an actual bartender. | 他的工作就是酒保 |
[05:35] | He’s qualified, and he’s still not holding his penis. | 资质符合 而且还没有露鸟 |
[05:37] | You’re hired. | 你被雇佣了 |
[05:38] | Welcome aboard, Randall. | 欢迎加入 兰德尔 |
[05:39] | I hate that name. People call me “Randy.” | 我讨厌这个名字 人们都叫我”兰迪” |
[05:43] | And we hate that name. Out you go. | 我们讨厌这个名字 你可以走了 |
[05:45] | No, no, no. | 不不不 |
[05:46] | No, no, that’s… come on. | 别啊 别这样 |
[05:47] | He’s not gonna bother me. | 他不会影响到我 |
[05:49] | He looks nothing like my Randy. | 他跟我的兰迪完全不像 |
[05:51] | My Randy is a | 我的兰迪 |
[05:53] | mountain of a man. | 如山一般高大伟岸 |
[05:55] | But life got in the way. | 但生活成了我们的阻碍 |
[05:57] | He lives in LA and I was starting this dessert bar. | 他住在洛杉矶 而我要打理这家甜品酒吧 |
[06:01] | Yeah, she’s not over it. | 唉 她仍余情未了 |
[06:03] | Yeah, and you really pooped the bed with the name thing. | 唉 你的名字让到嘴边的鸭子飞了 |
[06:07] | He could pick me up with one arm | 他可以一手拎着我 |
[06:09] | and carry Chinese food with the other. | 一手拎着中餐 |
[06:13] | Where’d that guy go? | 那家伙去哪儿了 |
[06:15] | He disappeared faster than Adam Lambert. | 他比亚当·兰伯特的名气消失得还快 |
[06:18] | Max, we need to avoid any reminders of Randy. | 麦克斯 我们得避开任何会让你想到兰迪的事物 |
[06:21] | I can’t go back to that depression you were in. | 我不想再次经历你抑郁的那阶段 |
[06:23] | It was so hard for me. | 我太可怜太难熬了 |
[06:26] | Don’t worry. | 别担心 |
[06:28] | I’ll be okay and so will we. | 我会没事的 我们也会没事的 |
[06:30] | This is Williamsburg; | 这里可是威廉斯堡 |
[06:31] | you can’t spit without hitting a bartender. | 随便吐个口水都能打中一个酒保 |
[06:33] | Or an artisanal pickle maker. | 或腌泡菜的人 |
[06:36] | Why do we live here? | 我们为什么要住这里啊 |
[06:38] | I’m here for the bartender interview. | 我是来面试酒保的 |
[06:45] | Oh, no, you two. | 不是吧 居然是你俩 |
[06:48] | How do we know him? | 我们认识他吗 |
[06:50] | Wait a minute. | 等等 |
[06:51] | Dad? | 爸爸 |
[06:54] | You’re the puppet guy that tried to sue us | 你是那个想告我们的木偶男 |
[06:56] | two years and three businesses ago | 就在两年前 我们三个生意之前时 |
[06:59] | She broke my puppet. | 她弄坏了我的木偶 |
[07:02] | Wait, we never had sex. | 等等 我们没有上过床啊 |
[07:06] | Did we? | 对吧 |
[07:08] | Do you wiggle a lot? | 你是不是老爱扭啊 |
[07:11] | I do. | 是的 |
[07:13] | But we didn’t. | 但我们没上过床 |
[07:15] | Anyway, uh, since I changed psychopharmacologists, | 总而言之 我换了精神药物学家后 |
[07:20] | the puppets aren’t talking to me | 木偶们跟我说话的次数 |
[07:22] | as much. | 变少了 |
[07:24] | Here’s my resume. | 这是我的简历 |
[07:37] | Please don’t call the references. | 千万不要打给上面的介绍人 |
[07:39] | They’re all jealous of me. | 他们都嫉妒我会说我坏话 |
[07:42] | Under special skills, you wrote, “Revenge.” | 特殊技能这里 你填的是《复仇》 |
[07:45] | Oh, whoops, that was supposed to be under | 哎呀 那应该是填在 |
[07:47] | “Favorite TV Shows.” | “喜爱的电视剧”那一栏 |
[07:49] | But can’t we just let bygones be bygones? | 都过去了 我们能既往不咎吗 |
[07:51] | I mean, really, I’ve done a lot of work on myself. | 说真的 我下了很大功夫改变自己 |
[07:53] | I have found inner peace, | 我找到了内心的平和 |
[07:55] | and I’ve completely… completely centered myself | 我通过一系列…一系列的治疗 |
[07:58] | through a series of… of therapy sessions | 完全… 完全集中自我后… |
[08:00] | that became intensely sexual. | 从治疗变成了性关系 |
[08:06] | Yeah, I know. It’s on your resume. | 我知道 你简历上有写 |
[08:08] | Him you can call. | 你可以打给他 |
[08:11] | We don’t like to work with | 我们不喜欢同事是 |
[08:13] | nemesises. | 臭人[仇人] |
[08:16] | Nemesi? | 丑人 |
[08:18] | Let’s just go with “Creepy people that we hate.” | 这么说吧 “我们讨厌的怪人” |
[08:22] | Fine. | 行 |
[08:23] | You two, with your porcelain skin | 你们俩皮肤白嫩 |
[08:26] | and your businesses. | 开个店了不起啊 |
[08:29] | I’ll go back to my crappy daytime job, | 我回去继续干我那份破工作 |
[08:31] | but FYI, Cagney and Lacey, | 但提醒你们一句 美国警花 |
[08:35] | nobody knows what the hell a dessert bar is. | 没人知道甜点酒吧到底是什么鬼 |
[08:39] | What is so hard to understand? | 有这么难以理解吗 |
[08:40] | It’s signature cocktails | 不就是招牌鸡尾酒 |
[08:42] | paired with dessert confections. | 配上甜品糖果吗 |
[08:45] | Why do all my enemies have to be geniuses? | 为什么我的仇家都是天才 |
[08:51] | He does seem a lot better. | 他的确看起来好多了 |
[08:53] | Max, we open in two days; we need a bartender. | 麦克斯 还有两天就开业了 我们需要一个酒保 |
[08:55] | Look, I will just take care of the drinks | 听着 酒水这块就先交给我 |
[08:57] | till we find the right person not named “Randy.” | 我们会找到不叫”兰迪”的合适人选 |
[09:00] | Max, look around. We did it. | 麦克斯 看看这里 我们做到了 |
[09:03] | And it only cost every cent we got | 只不过花光了 |
[09:05] | from your big movie deal. | 你电影合同挣来的每一分钱而已 |
[09:06] | And the weed money you were hiding | 还有你藏在”非大麻钱”盒子里的 |
[09:07] | in that box labeled “Not weed money.” | 用来买大麻的每一分钱 |
[09:10] | I’m gonna go check out the bathroom again. | 我再去检查一下厕所 |
[09:12] | You know you’ve made it when you have an industrial flush. | 拥有能自动冲水的马桶时 就知道自己成功了 |
[09:14] | The seat is clean. You don’t even have to hover. | 马桶圈是干净的 你不用撅着屁股 |
[09:17] | Come on! | 这么爽 |
[09:20] | Delivery for Max and Caroline. | 麦克斯和卡洛琳的快递到了 |
[09:24] | What are you wearing? | 你穿的是什么呀 |
[09:26] | And I don’t know how this is possible, | 我不知道这怎么有可能 |
[09:27] | but you have a camel toe. | 但你居然有骆驼趾 |
[09:30] | It’s my flower delivery uniform. | 这是我的送花制服 |
[09:32] | I picked up a shift so I could pay you two shrews faster | 我多打份工 就可以快点还你俩悍妇钱 |
[09:35] | and get my diner back. | 早点把餐厅弄回来 |
[09:37] | Now, could you please sign? I left my bicycle unlocked. | 麻烦签收一下 我的自行车没锁呢 |
[09:40] | It says, “Max and Caroline, | 上面写着 “麦克斯和卡洛琳 |
[09:41] | congratulations on your dessert bar, Randy.” | 祝你们的甜品酒吧开张大吉 兰迪” |
[09:45] | These are from Randy. | 这花是兰迪送的 |
[09:46] | Oh, my God. Get these out of here. | 天啊 快拿出去 |
[09:48] | The Upsy Daisies are our most popular item. | 雏菊宝宝是我们最受欢迎的花束 |
[09:52] | Widows get into fist fights over them. | 寡妇们可是为了这花大打出手呢 |
[09:55] | Yes! | 爽 |
[09:57] | Han, get these out of here. | 阿憨 快把这花拿走 |
[09:58] | I can’t have her see these. Go. | 我不能让她看见这花 快走 |
[10:00] | I will make a notation that you did not tip. | 我会写个批注 说你没给小费 |
[10:03] | No 19-digit promo code for you. | 你休想拿到19位数电子优惠码 |
[10:09] | The mail wasn’t there, but that unexplained puddle | 没有信件 但走廊那个不明水坑 |
[10:11] | in the hallway is thriving. | 现在越来越大了 |
[10:14] | I’m afraid they’re gonna call it a pool | 我好怕他们会称其为”泳池” |
[10:15] | and try to raise our rent. | 然后以此来提高租金 |
[10:17] | Good! | 很好啊 |
[10:18] | I’d love to have friends over to my puddle for a change. | 我也想有天能换我邀请朋友到自家水坑玩 |
[10:22] | Our liquor license was supposed to come today. | 我们的酒水供应许可证今天应该寄到了呀 |
[10:24] | We should have gotten mail by now. | 现在早应该收到信件了 |
[10:25] | We also should have left batteries | 我们也早该将电池 |
[10:27] | in the carbon monoxide detector, | 放进一氧化碳检测器 |
[10:28] | but I got tired of all the beeping. | 但我受够了那玩意一直响 |
[10:31] | Do your eyes feel bloodier than usual? | 你的眼睛是不是比平时更红啊 |
[10:35] | Hey, gals! | 姑娘们 |
[10:37] | Yeah, nope. Still not a mother. | 是的 没动静 我还没当妈 |
[10:40] | Oh, I’m so bored. | 我好无聊啊 |
[10:43] | I’ve Netflix’d, Hulu’d, Amazoned. | 看完三家在线视频网站的视频了 |
[10:46] | I’m about to HBO GO out of my mind. | 我准备要换第四家狂看了 |
[10:50] | Sophie, where did you get those Upsy Daisies? | 苏菲 这小雏菊哪儿来的 |
[10:53] | Oh, Han gave them to me. | 阿憨给我的 |
[10:55] | Yeah, and he tried to sell me a time-share in the Poconos. | 他还试图卖给我波克诺山的一套分时度假房 |
[10:58] | Yeah, but I got to say, | 可我不得不说 |
[11:00] | I was a little intrigued. | 我有一点点动心了 |
[11:02] | Sophie, you shouldn’t be down here. | 苏菲 你不该下来 |
[11:04] | There’s a probable carbon monoxide leak. | 我们这里的煤气很可能泄露了 |
[11:06] | You should go check out our pool. | 你去看看我们的泳池吧 |
[11:09] | Why did Han give you flowers? | 为什么阿憨要送你花 |
[11:11] | Is he trying to hit that? | 他想上你吗 |
[11:13] | Oh, well, he’d have to reach that first. | 那他也得先够得着那里才行啊 |
[11:16] | No, they were for you guys. | 没有啦 这花是送给你们的 |
[11:18] | Yeah, Caroline didn’t want them. | 卡洛琳不想要 |
[11:20] | Yeah, but I’m not above garbage flowers. | 可我不介意收别人不要的花 |
[11:23] | These are from Randy for me. | 这花是兰迪送给我的 |
[11:28] | You! | 你居然 |
[11:30] | Max, I didn’t want to tell you about the flowers. | 麦克斯 我不想告诉你花的事情 |
[11:32] | I didn’t want to upset you. | 因为我不希望你不开心 |
[11:34] | If you don’t want to upset me, | 如果你不希望我不开心 |
[11:35] | then why do you chew salad so loudly? | 那你嚼沙拉的时候为什么这么大声 |
[11:39] | Uh, she’s got a point there, Caroline. | 她说得很对 卡洛琳 |
[11:47] | I am not mad. | 我 不 生气 |
[11:50] | You’re not? | 真的吗 |
[11:51] | No. | 真的 |
[11:52] | It was really nice of Randy to send flowers | 兰迪人真好 还特地送花过来 |
[11:54] | and maybe I should call him. | 或许我该打给他 |
[11:56] | Bad idea to get in touch with Randy. | 跟兰迪联系可不是个好主意 |
[11:58] | Very bad idea, like, | 这主意糟透了 就像 |
[12:00] | jumpsuits on short women. | 小矮子穿连体裤 |
[12:01] | What? | 什么 |
[12:02] | He did a nice thing | 他发出了善意 |
[12:04] | and I just want to thank him. | 我只想谢谢他 |
[12:05] | We’ll thank him together. | 那我们一起谢他 |
[12:07] | You know what people like to get nowadays? | 你知道现在的人喜欢什么吗 |
[12:08] | A handwritten note. Let me grab my stationery. | 手写便条 让我拿我的信纸 |
[12:12] | It’s a Rite Aid receipt so there’s plenty of room. | 这是一张收据 有大把地方写字 |
[12:16] | – Dear Randy… – You know what? | -亲爱的兰迪 -算了 |
[12:18] | Just calling Randy is rude. | 打给兰迪太失礼了 |
[12:20] | Since when do you worry about rude? | 你什么时候开始担心失礼这件事了 |
[12:22] | – You interrupt almost every… – I want to FaceTime him. | -你几乎每次都打断… -我直接跟他视频好了 |
[12:24] | That’s much worse, and you just interrupted me Ag… | 那样更糟 你刚又打断我说话… |
[12:26] | – Hi, Randy. – Max! | -兰迪 -麦克斯 |
[12:28] | It’s so great to hear from you. | 很高兴你能找我 |
[12:30] | Is Caroline not there, or is she standing behind you | 卡洛琳不在吗 还是她站在你身后 |
[12:33] | with her arms folded, looking angry? | 双臂交叉 一脸不爽 |
[12:35] | My arms aren’t folded, they’re on my hips. | 我没有交叉双臂 我叉的是腰 |
[12:37] | And I’m not angry, | 而且我没有不爽 |
[12:38] | but Max called you without my permission. | 但麦克斯没有经过我同意就打给你 |
[12:41] | Hi, Miss Channing. | 你好 钱宁姐 |
[12:44] | Max has to get off the phone. | 麦克斯必须挂电话 |
[12:46] | You’re embarrassing me. | 你这样我好丢脸啊 |
[12:48] | Max, it took you three months | 麦克斯 你用了整整三个月 |
[12:50] | and a palette of Cheetos to get over him. | 吃了全部口味的薯片才忘了他 |
[12:52] | You covered the screen, not the speaker. | 你盖住的是屏幕 不是麦克风 |
[12:56] | You shouldn’t be talking to him. | 你不该跟他说话 |
[12:58] | You shouldn’t be wearing blue eye shadow. | 你也不该画蓝色眼影 |
[13:01] | You told me it looked nice | 是你说好看的 |
[13:03] | and now I’ve ruined the receipt and I can’t take it back. | 现在小票毁了 我不能退货了 |
[13:06] | Guys, I’m getting whiplash. | 两位 我脖子要扭伤啦 |
[13:08] | You know what? Everyone just calm down. | 都不要激动好不好 |
[13:11] | I’m just saying thank you. | 我只是想说声谢谢 |
[13:14] | God-uh! | 搞毛啊 |
[13:17] | Sophie, is it time? | 苏菲 到时间了吗 |
[13:18] | Are you in labor? | 你要生了吗 |
[13:20] | No. | 不 |
[13:21] | I broke my masturbating underwear. | 我自慰内裤坏了 |
[13:25] | Ah, but you know how that goes. | 但你知道怎么回事吧 |
[13:27] | I do not | 我不知道 |
[13:29] | and I will not act like I might. | 我也不会表现得我可能知道 |
[13:32] | You know, you’re a puzzle | 你是一个 |
[13:34] | that I have no interest in solving. | 我完全没兴趣解开的迷 |
[13:38] | Here’s your mail. | 你的信来了 |
[13:39] | The mail. | 信 |
[13:40] | Our liquor license. | 我们的酒水供应许可证 |
[13:41] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
[13:42] | You know what, | 对了 |
[13:43] | I think my masturbating underwear is short-circuiting, | 我觉得我的自慰内裤短路了 |
[13:46] | but… eeh… oh… but it feels pretty good. | 但… 触电感觉可是相当好哟 |
[13:52] | Is not coming because I made a tiny mistake on the forms? | 申请没通过 因为我填表时犯了个小错 |
[13:57] | Well, if it makes you feel any better, | 如果这话能让你好过些 |
[13:59] | nobody knows what a dessert bar is. | 我想说 没人知道甜品酒吧是什么鬼 |
[14:02] | And frankly, | 老实说 |
[14:03] | it just makes people angry. | 这点会让人很不爽 |
[14:08] | Max, I have bad news. | 麦克斯 我有个坏消息 |
[14:09] | Oh, my God… you’re naked! | 天啊 你怎么没穿衣服 |
[14:11] | I’m saying thank you to Randy. | 我在感谢兰迪呢 |
[14:15] | Looks like Randy is thanking himself. | 貌似兰迪在”感谢”他自己 |
[14:19] | Oh, hey, sorry about that. | 抱歉 |
[14:20] | That thank you kind of got away from us. | 感谢的过程有点失控了 |
[14:24] | Max, put your pants on, we’re going downtown. | 麦克斯 把裤子穿上 我们要去市区 |
[14:26] | That’s funny, Randy just told me | 真巧 兰迪刚叫我脱掉裤子 |
[14:28] | to take them off for the same reason. | 因为他也要去”湿区” |
[14:37] | Last time I saw a line this long, | 我上一次看见这么长的队伍[毒品] |
[14:39] | it went up my nose. | 统统被我吸进鼻子了 |
[14:41] | And I almost married Katt Williams. | 我还嗨到差点嫁给凯特·威廉姆斯 |
[14:44] | Excuse me? | 请问一下 |
[14:45] | Is there a different line for people | 这里有没有另一排队伍 |
[14:47] | who just made one tiny mistake and it’s not her fault | 是专门给表上有小错 但不是填写人的错 |
[14:49] | ’cause she was just overwhelmed at the time? | 是因为当时太累才填错的人排的 |
[14:57] | Max, we’re gonna die here. | 麦克斯 我们要死在这里了 |
[14:58] | Ugh, finally. | 终于解脱了 |
[15:01] | I’d give out flyers for the dessert bar, but I just saw | 我本想在这里发发甜品酒吧的传单 但我刚看见 |
[15:02] | someone pull an unwrapped cheese stick out of his pocket. | 有人从口袋里掏出一根没包装的芝士条 |
[15:05] | I can’t believe you filled out a form wrong. | 真不敢相信你填表也会出错 |
[15:08] | Start a business much? | 还创业呢 |
[15:11] | Uh, in my defense, this is kind of your fault. | 在我看来 这算是你的错 |
[15:15] | Me? How is it my fault? | 我 怎么就成了我的错了 |
[15:17] | I was in a fort made out of pillows most of July. | 我七月大部分时间都在枕头乡里 |
[15:20] | Or was it August? | 还是当时已经八月了 |
[15:22] | I don’t know, you can lose track of time in a fort. | 我不知道 你在枕头乡会忘记时间流逝 |
[15:24] | Exactly. | 没错 |
[15:25] | I had to jackass around this whole city | 但我不得不满城跑 |
[15:27] | to get the dessert bar ready while you were | 筹备甜品酒吧 而你却在 |
[15:29] | rolling in the deep, getting over Randy. | 悲伤中翻滚 试图忘掉兰迪 |
[15:31] | So… | 所以 |
[15:33] | hello from the other side. | 来自枕头乡外的问候 |
[15:37] | Girl fight. | 妹子撕逼 |
[15:38] | Worldstar. | 开撕啦 |
[15:42] | And now, after all that, | 事到如今 你经历了那么多 |
[15:44] | I catch you going down on Randy’s iPhone. | 却被我抓包你和兰迪在视频激情 |
[15:46] | I’m warning you right now, | 我现在就警告你 |
[15:48] | I am not bathing you again. | 我不会再帮你洗澡了 |
[15:50] | Look, there is a mathematical formula | 听着 有一道数学公式 |
[15:53] | involved in break-up sex. | 存在于分手炮里 |
[15:54] | What do you know about math? | 你懂个屁数学啊 |
[15:56] | You always leave out six when you count to ten. | 你连数1到10 都会忘了数6 |
[16:00] | Doesn’t mean you’re stupid. | 那不意味着你蠢 |
[16:01] | A lot of persons do that. | 很多人都会这样 |
[16:04] | Typically, in a break-up, | 通常来说 两人分手后 |
[16:05] | if you live in the same city, | 如果你们住在同一个城市 |
[16:07] | you go to the guy’s house to pick up your stuff, | 你去男方家里收拾你的东西 |
[16:09] | and then you do it. | 你们会打一炮 |
[16:10] | That’s one time. | 这是第一炮 |
[16:12] | Then you “forget something” and he brings it to your place | 然后你”漏拿了东西” 他送到你家 |
[16:15] | and then you do it. | 你们又会打一炮 |
[16:15] | That’s two. | 这是第二炮 |
[16:16] | Then you run into each other at a bar, | 然后你们在酒吧相遇 |
[16:19] | do it in the bathroom. | 在厕所里打炮 |
[16:20] | Three. | 第三炮 |
[16:21] | Then you fake a pregnancy. That’s four. | 接着你假装怀孕 第四炮 |
[16:24] | Then he fakes an STD. That’s five. | 再接着他假装得性病 第五炮 |
[16:26] | And then you’re broken up. | 再然后你们就彻底分手了 |
[16:31] | There’s been no math. | 根本没有数学 |
[16:33] | Five is a number. | 五是一个数字 |
[16:35] | Numbers are math. Read a book. | 数字就是数学 看看书吧 |
[16:38] | Yeah. Read a book. | 对啊 要多看书 |
[16:40] | Name a book. | 你说个书名来听听 |
[16:42] | The phone book. | 电话本[书] |
[16:46] | This line is for municipal licenses only. | 这里只办市政许可证 |
[16:49] | Not driver’s licenses, wedding licenses, or whatnot. | 驾照 结婚证或其他的 一律不在这里 |
[16:52] | Municipal licenses. | 只办市政许可证 |
[16:53] | If you don’t know what that is, you’re in the wrong line. | 如果你不知道是什么 那你就是排错队了 |
[16:56] | How could you not know what line | 怎么会有人不知道 |
[16:57] | you’re supposed to be standing in? | 就瞎排队呢 |
[17:03] | Randy, let me call you back from the bathroom. | 兰迪 我等下去厕所打给你 |
[17:05] | I know where it is. I used to work here. | 我知道在哪儿 我以前在这工作过 |
[17:07] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
[17:09] | Hey, Caroline. | 卡洛琳 |
[17:11] | Oh, Max was just thanking me for the flowers again. | 麦克斯又在因为花的事感谢我呢 |
[17:13] | That’s why I’m not wearing a shirt. | 所以我没有穿上衣 |
[17:16] | Or pants. | 或裤子 |
[17:18] | Uh, let me call you back, but keep your pants off. | 晚点打给你 裤子先别穿上哦 |
[17:22] | What? I am not counting that as one. | 干嘛 这一次我不会算入五次中 |
[17:24] | Were you really gonna spank it | 你真的打算在 |
[17:26] | in the middle of the municipal building? | 政府办公楼打他屁股吗 |
[17:28] | Spank it? | 打屁股 |
[17:30] | Don’t be crass, Caroline. | 别这么低俗好吗 卡洛琳 |
[17:32] | Yes. | 是的 |
[17:34] | Next! | 下一个 |
[17:35] | Ding ding ding! | 来了 来了 |
[17:37] | It’s just some clerical error | 应该只是笔误之类的 |
[17:38] | so we should be able to get our license today. | 我们应该今天就可以拿到许可证了 |
[17:40] | Let me handle this. | 让我来处理 |
[17:41] | You know you have a history of | 毕竟你也知道你过去有 |
[17:42] | getting slappy with bureaucrats. | 碰到官老爷就犯二的历史 |
[17:45] | Hi. | 您好 |
[17:46] | We got this in the mail, | 我们收到这封信 |
[17:48] | and there’s been some teensy little mistake… | 里面貌似有个小小的错误 |
[17:49] | Well, well, well! | 哎哟哟 |
[17:53] | Him! | 这货 |
[17:56] | I’ve got this, Moesha. | 莫伊莎 放着我来 |
[17:58] | Why don’t you go clean up your little | 你何不去清理一下 |
[17:59] | Lean Cuisine explosion in the microwave? | 微波炉里你弄出来的速冻食品残渣呢 |
[18:02] | Oh, she’s a mess. | 她可邋遢了 |
[18:05] | Now, how can I | 我能怎么 |
[18:07] | not help you two? | 给两位帮倒忙呢 |
[18:10] | This is your dead-end job? | 这就是你说的没出路工作吗 |
[18:12] | I pictured you working as a drug mule | 我还想象你是去当运毒人 |
[18:14] | or a seat filler on The View. | 或脱口秀节目充场面的观众呢 |
[18:17] | That’s a job? | 那也叫工作吗 |
[18:19] | Dude, I just made a mistake on the application. | 兄弟 我就只是申请表上填错了 |
[18:22] | Can’t you just give us a break? | 能不能放我们一马 |
[18:23] | Our dessert bar is supposed to open tomorrow night. | 我们的甜品酒吧本来应该明晚开幕 |
[18:25] | Please? | 求你了 |
[18:26] | I gave up a boyfriend for this business, | 我为了这生意放弃了我男朋友 |
[18:28] | and I’m gonna mess up | 如果这事黄了 |
[18:29] | her pretty face if it doesn’t work out. | 我一定会把她这张美颜划个稀巴烂 |
[18:31] | Max, thank you. | 麦克斯 谢谢你 |
[18:33] | I was starting to think you didn’t think I was that pretty. | 我本来还开始觉得你认为我没那么好看呢 |
[18:37] | If we don’t fix this, we’re gonna have to delay our opening. | 如果我们不搞定这事 我们开幕就得延后了 |
[18:40] | So please? | 求求你了 |
[18:42] | You know what? | 这样吧 |
[18:43] | Let me talk to my supervisor. | 我跟我上司谈谈 |
[18:52] | His neck’s a little rusty, | 他的脖子有些僵硬了 |
[18:54] | but that’s a no. | 但他摇头了 |
[18:59] | I would make us a drink but without a liquor license, | 我想给咱俩调杯酒 但没有许可证 |
[19:02] | all I can make is meth. | 我唯一能做的只有冰毒 |
[19:04] | This is all my fault. | 这全是我的错 |
[19:05] | No, I was in a funk about Randy | 不是 是我因为兰迪变成废人 |
[19:08] | and you had to do all this stuff on your own. | 所以你得自己张罗各种大小事 |
[19:09] | – It’s my fault. – Okay, good. | -是我的错 -好吧 太好了 |
[19:11] | That’s what I really thought, | 这才是我真实想法 |
[19:13] | but I just wanted to make sure it was out there. | 但我想先确定咱俩都这么想 |
[19:16] | We have zero luck, Max, zero. | 麦克斯 我们毫无运气 屁点没有 |
[19:19] | I just stopped by to say | 我就顺便过来说一句 |
[19:22] | I’m sorry about your dessert bar. | 甜品酒吧的事我也很遗憾 |
[19:25] | You two are unlucky A, F. | 你俩倒霉到”像屎”啊 |
[19:30] | That’s “As Freddie.” | 是”像屎迪哥” |
[19:32] | He’s a friend of mine. | 他是我的朋友 |
[19:34] | He’s very unlucky. | 他就倒霉到不行 |
[19:37] | Earl, | 厄尔 |
[19:38] | there’s no outside liquor. | 不能从外面带酒 |
[19:40] | ‘Cause it just makes us feel worse. | 因为这会让我们感觉更糟糕 |
[19:42] | This ain’t outside liquor. It’s from the diner. | 这不是外面带的酒 这是餐厅的 |
[19:44] | Can’t you tell by the beef floating in it? | 从酒上飘的牛肉碎 你看不出吗 |
[19:48] | Oh, my God. It’s not from outside. | 天啊 这不是外面带的酒 |
[19:50] | It’s from the diner. | 是从餐厅内部 |
[19:51] | Max, who owns the diner? | 麦克斯 餐厅老板是谁 |
[19:53] | Me, you, and an Asian squirrel. | 我 你 还有一只亚洲松鼠 |
[19:56] | Max, we don’t need a liquor license because… | 麦克斯 我们不需要再申请许可证因为… |
[19:58] | We already have one. | 我们已经有一个了 |
[20:00] | Oh! I just did more math. | 我又做了一道数学题 |
[20:02] | Still not math! | 这也不算数学 |
[20:06] | I haven’t seen women move that fast | 我上一次看女人跑这么快 |
[20:09] | since the Activia recall. | 是酸奶出现细菌污染被召回那次 |
[20:12] | Here it is! | 找到了 |
[20:14] | Oh, my God, Han’s middle name is Margaret. | 天啊 阿憨的中间名是玛格丽特 |
[20:17] | Sometimes the universe just gives you a gift. | 想不到天上真的会掉馅饼啊 |
[20:20] | This entitles the owner, operator, operators… | 凡持有该证的老板 经营者 经营者们… |
[20:23] | That’s us! | 就是我们 |
[20:23] | …of the Williamsburg Diner | 威廉斯堡餐厅的经营者 |
[20:25] | to serve alcohol to those persons 21 and over, | 有权贩卖酒类给21岁以上顾客 |
[20:28] | reserving the right to not serve those persons | 以及不卖酒类商品给 |
[20:29] | who do not supply valid ID! | 不能出示有效证件客人 |
[20:31] | Max, do you know what this means? | 麦克斯 你知道这代表什么意思吗 |
[20:32] | I am totally carding Han Margaret | 我绝对要在憨·玛格丽特 |
[20:35] | when he comes in our dessert bar, | 来甜品酒吧时 检查他证件 |
[20:37] | which is so opening tomorrow night. | 我们酒吧明晚绝对能开幕 |
[20:40] | Hey, every-baby. | 各位宝宝安安 |
[20:43] | Still preg… achoo! | 还怀着… |
[21:03] | Are you guys seeing this too? | 你们也看到这个了吗 |
[21:08] | I’m never gonna forget it. | 我这辈子都忘不掉了 |
[21:12] | I think my water broke. | 我的羊水好像破了 |
[21:15] | Oleg! | 奥列格 |
[21:15] | Get out here and bring the mop bucket. | 快拿水桶拖把出来 |
[21:17] | Sophie’s in labor. | 苏菲要生了 |
[21:18] | Oh. I’m calling the car right now. | 我现在就打电话叫车 |
[21:21] | It says “Your Lyft driver is already here.” | 上面写着”你的司机已到” |
[21:24] | Did somebody order a car? | 有人叫车吗 |
[21:27] | Look, it’s Minnie Driver. | 是女演员明妮·德里弗[迷你司机] |
[21:30] | Sophie, we’re having a baby. | 苏菲 我们的孩子要出世啦 |
[21:34] | I’m scared. | 我好怕 |
[21:36] | She should be scared, | 她的确该怕 |
[21:37] | she’s wearing electric underwear. | 她穿着通电内裤呢 |
[21:42] | Slow, easy breaths. | 慢慢来 深呼吸 |
[21:44] | I am! | 我有啊 |
[21:46] | I was more talking to myself. | 我其实是在跟自己说啦 |
[21:48] | Don’t leave me in there alone. | 别丢下我一个人啊 |
[21:51] | You know I see dead people. | 明知道我快死 现在都能看到鬼了 |
[21:54] | It’s coming. | 要来了 |
[21:55] | It’s coming! | 就要来了 |
[21:59] | It’s here! | 到了 |
[22:01] | The baby? | 孩子吗 |
[22:08] | Well, a baby. | 的确来了个”孩子” |
[22:10] | Oh, good, our goober driver’s here. | 好了 我们的”幼”步司机到了 |
[22:12] | Aren’t I suffering enough | 为了从你俩手上赎回餐厅 |
[22:14] | to get the diner back from you two? | 我受的苦还不够吗 |
[22:16] | I’m already driving for Lyft and Uber | 我已经同时是滴滴和优步的司机 |
[22:19] | and selling Molly out of that glove compartment. | 副驾杂物箱里还有兼职卖的摇头丸呢 |
[22:21] | Shotgun! | 我要坐副驾 |
[22:25] | Han, I hate to hit the stereotype of Asian women drivers, | 阿憨 我不想说亚洲女司机车技都烂 |
[22:29] | but could you speed the hell up? | 但你他娘的能不能开快点 |
[22:31] | Do you want to arrive quickly | 你们是想快点到达 |
[22:33] | or do you want to arrive safely? | 还是想要安全到达 |
[22:35] | A teddy bear doesn’t count as carpooling, lady! | 放个泰迪熊你开毛多人车道啊 死婆娘 |
[22:40] | I can’t have a car baby. | 我孩子不能是车生儿 |
[22:42] | Three of my brothers were born in the car. | 我三个兄弟都是车上出生的 |
[22:45] | On the way to the woods, | 都是在去森林的路上 |
[22:46] | where they were supposed to be born. | 他们本应该在森林里出生 |
[22:49] | Sophie, do you think you could move your seat up a scooch? | 苏菲 你的座位能不能往前拉一点 |
[22:52] | Only because I think my leg is broken. | 只因我腿已压骨折 |
[22:55] | This reminds me of a road trip I took one time | 这让我想起有次公路旅行 |
[22:58] | with Earth, Wind & Fire. | 我跟大地风火乐团的人一起 |
[23:00] | The car was so cramped, | 结果因为车上太挤 |
[23:01] | we had to leave Wind behind. | 我们只好先放”风”下车 |
[23:03] | I feel like someone just left some wind behind in here. | 我觉得车上的某人屁股也放了”风” |
[23:08] | Signal much? | 敢打灯吗 |
[23:12] | Sophie, smile for the camera. | 苏菲 冲镜头笑一个 |
[23:17] | I don’t want to miss a minute. | 我不想错过任何一秒 |
[23:19] | No Golishevsky man has ever been there | 我家族的男人还没有过任何一个 |
[23:21] | for the birth of his child. | 是孩子出世时在身边陪着的 |
[23:23] | Why, because it’s bad luck | 为啥 是因为看到 |
[23:24] | to see your wife before she’s born? | 自己的老婆出生会带来霉运吗 |
[23:27] | You tell one story where your uncle marries his daughter, | 跟人分享自己的叔叔娶了他女儿的故事 |
[23:30] | and suddenly, you’re the incest guy. | 突然之间 自己就被人当乱伦男 |
[23:33] | Uh-oh. | 惨了 |
[23:35] | It’s happening. | 真要生了 |
[23:38] | Ah, I can feel the baby’s head. | 我能感觉到宝宝的脑袋 |
[23:47] | It’s your sandwich. | 是你的潜艇堡啊 |
[23:50] | It’s yours now. | 送你吧 |
[23:54] | All right. | 好吧 |
[23:57] | Sophie, you have to make it to the hospital. | 苏菲 你得撑到医院啊 |
[23:59] | I sold my rare toe-porn collection | 我卖了我世面罕见的脚趾控黄片 |
[24:02] | to pay for a fancy birthing suite. | 订了高档产房呢 |
[24:05] | I’m gonna give birth to this baby in style. | 我要很有范儿地生下这孩子 |
[24:08] | I won’t have to protect it from wild animals afterwards, | 毕竟生完不需要担心有野生动物袭击 |
[24:11] | you know, which is nice. | 这感觉太好了 |
[24:14] | Sophie, don’t get too comfortable in that suite. | 苏菲 别在高档产房里待舒爽了才生 |
[24:16] | You’re gonna need to drop it like it’s hot | 一到医院就把孩子像 |
[24:18] | the second we get to the hospital. | 拉开插销的手榴弹一样扔出来 |
[24:20] | Max and I have to get ready for our dessert bar opening. | 我和麦克斯还得给甜品酒吧开幕做准备呢 |
[24:23] | Baby on board! Move it or lose it! | 车上有婴儿 挡我者死 |
[24:27] | In their defense, it looks like no one’s driving this car. | 替他们辩解下 他们看不出这车是有人驾驶的 |
[24:34] | Excuse me, doctor? It’s been 12 hours. | 不好意思 医生 已经12小时了 |
[24:37] | Is there some way we could speed this up? | 有没有什么方法能加速一下 |
[24:39] | You know, jumping jacks, Indian food, | 比如让她开合跳 吃印度菜拉出来 |
[24:41] | a C-section? | 或剖腹产 |
[24:43] | Does she need to be in here? | 她有在场的需要吗 |
[24:45] | Yeah. | 有吧 |
[24:48] | Yeah, that one | 这妞 |
[24:50] | and the other one over there are the godparents. | 跟那边那妞 是这孩子的干妈 |
[24:53] | Max. | 麦克斯 |
[24:55] | Yeah, girl. | 加油啊 老姐 |
[24:57] | They’re not a couple. | 她们不是一对 |
[24:59] | Oleg thinks they do it a little though. | 虽然奥列格觉得她们有一点拉拉倾向 |
[25:03] | Only 1 centimeter. I don’t feel anything. | 只开了一公分 还是没有出来的迹象 |
[25:06] | It could be a while. | 估计还得一阵 |
[25:07] | Sophie, you may want to take off the Spanx. | 苏菲 你最好把束腹裤脱了吧 |
[25:09] | I’m pregnant. | 我只是怀孕 |
[25:11] | I’m not dead. | 又不是死了 |
[25:15] | Oh, man, tub legs. | 坐浴缸脚麻了 |
[25:18] | I’ll be back. | 我会再回来 |
[25:19] | But not because I want to. | 不过不是因为我想回来 |
[25:23] | Oleg, come on, film the room. | 奥列格 赶紧啊 拍下这产房 |
[25:26] | I want our baby to know that I was treated like a queen. | 我想要孩子知道我曾有过女皇般待遇 |
[25:31] | You know, I think Elton John had this room | 我记得艾尔顿·约翰生孩子的时候 |
[25:33] | when he gave birth. | 好像就是在这间生的 |
[25:35] | I’m sorry, I lost y’all. | 抱歉 我刚才找不到你们 |
[25:37] | I feel asleep on a gurney and woke up in the morgue. | 我在轮床上睡着 醒来发现被人推到停尸间了 |
[25:43] | I scared the pants off a bunch of med students. | 我把一票医科学生给吓尿了 |
[25:49] | Ooh, there’s my alarm. | 我的闹钟响了 |
[25:51] | I have to go have break-up phone sex with my ex, Randy. | 我得去跟我的前男友兰迪打电话分手炮了 |
[25:54] | Like you do. | 就像你们一样 |
[25:56] | Well, don’t go very far ’cause | 别走太远 |
[25:58] | Oleg gets fainty in hospitals | 奥列格在医院 |
[26:00] | and supermarkets that also sell clothing. | 跟那些卖丑衣服的超市会头晕 |
[26:04] | It’s just too much. | 太难以接受了 |
[26:07] | Max, you and Randy have had more sex since your break-up | 麦克斯你跟兰迪打过的分手炮 |
[26:10] | then I had with my college boyfriend. | 比我跟我大学男友”做”过的还多次 |
[26:12] | Granted, he was very busy with musical theater. | 虽然他是因为当年醉心于音乐剧 |
[26:15] | The only time we had sex was when he was in his Cats’ costume | 我们唯一一次做爱 是他穿着《猫》的戏服 |
[26:18] | and he asked me to give him a Rum Tum Tugger. | 并让我以剧中帅猫身份来”宠幸”他 |
[26:21] | The rule is | 规矩就是 |
[26:23] | you have sex five times before you’re broken up. | 在正式分手前得”做”足足五次 |
[26:25] | And this is number five. | 而这是第五次 |
[26:26] | Historically, the biggest, sweatiest, | 根据过往经验 最盛大 汗水淋漓 |
[26:28] | and the most butt-centric… | 最以菊花为中心的一次 |
[26:30] | his, not mine. | 他的 不是我的 |
[26:31] | So… | 所以 |
[26:33] | Do not disturb. | 请勿打扰 |
[26:36] | It’s facing the wrong way, and it’s very disturbing. | 你平板拿反了 画面十分恶心人[打扰] |
[26:40] | Hey, Randy. | 兰迪 你好啊 |
[26:41] | Oh, sorry, I just, uh, just woke up. | 抱歉 我… 刚起床 |
[26:44] | Looks like you’ve been up for awhile. | 感觉你已经”起立”一段时间啦 |
[26:46] | Mind if I camp under that pup tent? | 不介意我去你裤裆”帐篷”里待吧 |
[26:50] | Can you go roast his marshmallows somewhere else? | 你能去别的地方烤他的”串儿”吗 |
[26:56] | Excuse me, there’s a VVVIP patient coming in | 不好意思 有个超超超级贵宾要来 |
[26:59] | who needs this room. | 他们要求清出这间 |
[27:01] | I don’t care what kind of disease they have. | 我才不管他们是有啥病 |
[27:05] | I’m not going. | 老娘哪都不去 |
[27:10] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
[27:11] | That’s supermodel Vanessa Nibotito. | 是超模瓦妮莎·妮波迪托 |
[27:14] | She’s pretty and smart. | 她又漂亮又聪明 |
[27:16] | It’s hard, right girl? | 两者兼具很难吧 姐妹 |
[27:19] | I… I paid for this room. | 我付钱订了这间房呢 |
[27:20] | That giant bag of quarters? That’s us! | 那一大袋硬币是我们付的啊 |
[27:25] | Is my baby bump seriously getting bumped | 我的宝宝真的要被山寨版的我 |
[27:28] | by a poor man’s me? | 给挤去别间病房了吗 |
[27:31] | I’m so sorry. | 太对不住了 |
[27:33] | I could send you a copy of my motherhood book if you’d like. | 有兴趣我可以叫人送你一本我的怀孕全纪录 |
[27:36] | The lady I paid to write it did a great job. | 我请的代笔写得可好了 |
[27:41] | Oh, wait… wait a minute, no… I’m not going anywhere. | 等等 等等 不要 我哪都不去 |
[27:43] | No, wait a minute. | 不要 等等 |
[27:44] | Wait, I’m not… no, I’m not going. | 等等 我不要走 我不要 |
[27:46] | You can’t make me. No, wait a minute. | 你们不能逼我 别啊 |
[27:48] | Wait a min… oh, wait, wait, wait. | 等等 等等 稍等一下 |
[27:50] | Oh, look, I’m getting a little arm workout here. | 你们看 我在这还能做点手部锻炼呢 |
[27:57] | Sophie, the hospital is saying they bounced us from the room | 苏菲 医院说他们把我们赶出病房 |
[28:00] | because we took too long. | 是因为我们拖太长时间了 |
[28:01] | They’re offering us a cot near the burn unit of the ICU. | 给我们一张重症监护室烧烫伤科旁的小床 |
[28:06] | Well, | 好吧 |
[28:07] | ICU don’t understand that I’m not having this baby | 看来他们的人不知道 |
[28:11] | until I get back in my suite. | 我没回到那间房是不会生的 |
[28:13] | That’s a hard “No,” Chris. | 克里斯 她打死也不要 |
[28:16] | Guess who just flirted her way into a free carpal tunnel glove? | 猜猜谁调情骗来了免费的腕管综合症手套 |
[28:19] | Some girls flirt their way into a sugar daddy; | 某些女孩调情勾引干爹 |
[28:22] | I get medical supplies. | 而我则是免费医疗用品 |
[28:25] | And more good news… | 好消息不止如此 |
[28:26] | Did you get me my room back? | 你把我病房要回来了吗 |
[28:27] | No, those days are over. | 那段好日子已经过完了 |
[28:28] | We’re hallway people now. | 咱们现在是走廊游民的命 |
[28:30] | But I was able to print out flyers for our dessert bar. | 但我趁机给甜品酒吧打印了传单 |
[28:33] | I’d love to give them a rounded edge. | 我想给传单弄成圆边 |
[28:35] | Do you have scissors? | 你有剪刀吗 |
[28:36] | Are you kidding me? | 你是不是闹呢 |
[28:38] | Of course I do. Look in my bag. | 我当然有啦 我包里给你找 |
[28:41] | Sophie, they’re offering us a full-size bed, | 苏菲 他们愿意给我们完整大小病床 |
[28:44] | but it’s in an MRI machine. | 但是是在核磁共振机里 |
[28:46] | I think we should take it. | 我觉得我们该接受 |
[28:49] | Dessert bar opening tonight. | 甜品酒吧今晚开幕 |
[28:50] | We have a ramp. | 我们有轮椅专道 |
[28:52] | Excuse me, coming through. Coming through. | 不好意思 借过 借过 |
[28:55] | A-lister about to give birth. | 有大牌病人要生了 |
[28:58] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
[28:59] | Celebrity doctor, Nancy Gonzales! | 明星医生 南希·刚萨雷斯 |
[29:02] | You know, I wear your perfume. | 我喷的就是你出的香水呢 |
[29:05] | Nancy, you might have heard, dessert bar opening tonight. | 南希 你可能有听说 甜品酒吧今晚开幕 |
[29:09] | Someone needs to control the hallway people. | 来个人管管这些走廊游民 |
[29:13] | Randy. | 兰迪 |
[29:18] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
[29:22] | That wasn’t me, it was naughty nurse Wanda. | 不是我 是调皮护士旺达 |
[29:26] | I was about to give Wanda a shot. | 正打算给旺达”来一针” |
[29:28] | Well, she was gonna give it to herself, | 应该说是她要给自己”来一针” |
[29:29] | but I was gonna tell her exactly how to do it. | 只不过我会指导她准确该怎么”做” |
[29:32] | Max, isn’t playing doctor in a hospital | 麦克斯 在医院玩色情医生俏护士 |
[29:35] | a little on the nose? | 也太没哏了吧 |
[29:36] | I like to be on theme. | 我喜欢有个主题嘛 |
[29:37] | We can play pirate and lusty wench | 如果是在海鲜速食餐厅 |
[29:39] | when I’m in a Long John Silver’s. | 我也能跟他玩淫荡海盗娇村姑啊 |
[29:41] | No, you won’t because we’re not allowed in there | 你不能 因为我们就是因为这原因 |
[29:43] | for that very reason. | 上了店里的黑名单 |
[29:45] | Plus, didn’t you already have your fifth time? | 而且你不是已经搞过第五次了吗 |
[29:47] | You see, Caroline, break-up sex in LA is six times. | 卡洛琳 是这样的 洛城的分手炮是6次 |
[29:51] | It’s the DeVito-Perlman rule. | 明星夫妻雷亚与德维托的规矩 |
[29:52] | Rhea forgot her yoga mat, and five limoncellos later, | 雷亚闹分手时回家拿瑜伽毯 五瓶甜酒下肚 |
[29:55] | boom! | 一炮 |
[29:56] | The rest is history. | 剩下的就是过往云烟了 |
[29:59] | He’s a lawyer so we have to listen to him. | 他是律师 所以我们得听他的 |
[30:04] | Dessert bar opening tonight. | 甜品酒吧今晚开幕 |
[30:06] | Sophie, any progress in your nethers? | 苏菲 你下面有点动静了吗 |
[30:08] | ‘Cause our dessert bar opens in five hours, | 我们甜品酒吧再五小时要开幕了 |
[30:10] | and it promises I’ll be there on the flyer. | 而传单上写了我本人保证会在现场 |
[30:12] | Dessert bar opening tonight. I’ll be there. | 甜品酒吧今晚开幕 我会在场哦 |
[30:16] | Did you really have to refer to yourself as | 你真的要把自己称呼为 |
[30:17] | “New York’s Own Caroline Channing”? | “纽约招牌卡洛琳·钱宁”吗 |
[30:21] | She’s coming. Hallway people, clear a path. | 她要出来了 走廊游民 闪开 |
[30:27] | Congratulations | 恭喜你啊 |
[30:29] | because you’re invited to our dessert bar opening. | 因为你被邀请出席甜品酒吧开幕 |
[30:32] | You can bring the baby if you want, | 你可以带你的婴儿一起来 |
[30:33] | but I wouldn’t love it. | 不过我不会太高兴 |
[30:35] | What’s dessert? | 甜点是什么 |
[30:39] | I’m still tweeting that she’s coming. | 我还是要发微博说她会来 |
[30:42] | I’m taking the suite back, girls. | 我要把这间病房抢回来了 姑娘们 |
[30:45] | Roll me in! | 推我进去 |
[30:47] | Yeah, we’re not hallway people anymore. | 没错 我们又不是走廊游民啦 |
[30:57] | How long can sushi be sitting out? | 寿司可以放多久不坏 |
[31:03] | Ooh, not that long. | 没多久 |
[31:05] | What about this one? | 那这个呢 |
[31:07] | Max, don’t. | 麦克斯 别啊 |
[31:08] | It promises on the flyer | 传单上也保证了 |
[31:10] | that you’ll be at the dessert bar opening too. | 你到时候也会在甜品酒吧开幕现场 |
[31:12] | It’s in smaller letters, but it’s there. | 虽然用的字号比较小 但还是有写啊 |
[31:17] | Oh. I got here as fast as I could. | 我尽最快速度赶来了 |
[31:19] | To take the baby out? | 来把宝宝接生出来吗 |
[31:20] | No, to see the model. | 不 是来看超模啊 |
[31:23] | Um, she’s gone. | 她已经走了 |
[31:24] | She kept saying, “Where’s Doctor Gomulka?” | 她一直念叨”哥穆尔卡医生在哪” |
[31:26] | Really? | 她真叫我了吗 |
[31:27] | No, no one’s ever said that. | 没有 永远不会有人这么说 |
[31:29] | Well, since I’m already disappointed, | 反正已经失望至极 |
[31:32] | I guess I’ll take a look under the hood. | 我就再看一眼单子底下吧 |
[31:35] | Oleg, you know how I love to have a snack | 奥列格 你知道我很喜欢 |
[31:38] | when I get my exam. | 被检查时吃零食吗 |
[31:41] | I’ll go to the gift shop and grab you some | 我这就去礼品店给你买一些 |
[31:42] | chocolate-heavy trail mix and some Hubba Bubba. | 巧克力坚果包跟口香糖 |
[31:47] | Oh, and Oleg! | 奥列格 |
[31:48] | Turn the bag upside down and… oh. | 把袋子反过来然后… |
[31:51] | He knows. | 他懂我要求 |
[31:54] | Well, if I were a gambling man, I’d say | 如果我是个赌徒 我大概会赌 |
[31:56] | it’ll be at least five hours. | 至少五小时后出生吧 |
[32:03] | And that’s how I lost my house. | 我就是这么赌输掉我房子的 |
[32:07] | Nurse, I need something to cut the umbilical cord. | 护士 我需要东西剪脐带 |
[32:09] | Oh, I… wait, wait. | 等等 等等 |
[32:11] | You’re in luck. | 你运气真好 |
[32:19] | Sophie, | 苏菲 |
[32:21] | you did great. | 你太棒了 |
[32:23] | You’re a mother. | 你现在是个母亲了 |
[32:24] | Also, gesundheit. | 祝你健康 |
[32:27] | Aw, the baby’s beautiful. | 宝宝真好看 |
[32:29] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
[32:31] | I had the baby! | 我把孩子生下来了 |
[32:34] | And Oleg missed it. | 而奥列格错过了这一刻 |
[32:36] | Oh, and he had his heart set on seeing the baby being born. | 他一早就下定决心要看着孩子出世 |
[32:41] | And he missed it. | 结果他错过了 |
[32:42] | He’s never gonna forgive himself! | 他永远不会原谅自己 |
[32:45] | He’s never, never, never, never, never, never… | 他永远永远永远永远永远永远… |
[32:49] | Please, Sophie, calm down. | 别这样 苏菲 冷静 |
[32:51] | Maybe Oleg didn’t miss it. | 或许奥列格没错过 |
[32:54] | It worries me how little you know about science stuff. | 你对科学的无知好让我担心啊 |
[32:58] | We’ll fake the birth. | 我们可以来一场假生产嘛 |
[33:01] | You’re asking me to help you fake a birth? | 你是在叫我帮忙搞一场假生产吗 |
[33:04] | You’ll be fine. You’ve faked an orgasm. | 你能行 你都假高潮过了 |
[33:09] | Well, that’s true. | 好吧 的确 |
[33:13] | We have to make Oleg pass out long enough to bring | 我们得想办法让奥列格晕过去够长时间 |
[33:15] | the baby in and make him think he just missed | 才能把宝宝抱回来 再让他以为 |
[33:17] | a second of the actual birth. | 他其实只是走神了一下子 |
[33:19] | Sophie, act like you’re in labor. | 苏菲 快假装你要生了 |
[33:20] | Just yell and tell Oleg you wish you never met him. | 就大叫 然后说早知道就不该认识奥列格 |
[33:23] | It should be easy. | 应该很好演 |
[33:25] | He’s coming. Places. | 他来了 各就各位 |
[33:29] | Sorry it took so long, but the lady in front of me | 抱歉这么久才回来 但排我前面的女人 |
[33:31] | paid for her Jujubes with a third-party check. | 要用背书转让支票来付软糖钱 |
[33:35] | Oh, I’m in pain! | 我好疼啊 |
[33:38] | Oh, I’m about to have a baby | 我要生下孩子啦 |
[33:41] | for the first time! | 第一次呢 |
[33:43] | Okay. I’m ready. | 好了 我准备好了 |
[33:45] | I popped a Pepto and what I’m now realizing | 我随手拿了罐东西喝 现在我意识到 |
[33:47] | was a laxative. | 那是泻药 |
[33:50] | Oleg, | 奥列格 |
[33:52] | you stay out of the splash zone. | 快躲到溅射范围外 |
[33:53] | It’s go time. | 要生啦 |
[33:55] | Oh, there is some seriously birthy stuff going on down here. | 这底下有好些触目惊心不忍直视的东西 |
[33:59] | Oh, should we get a doctor? | 要不要去叫医生来啊 |
[34:01] | Even a girl one? | 没男的叫女的也好 |
[34:03] | There’s no time! | 没时间了 |
[34:04] | Because of all the oozing gunk! | 各种恶心分泌物大量喷出 |
[34:09] | Push, Sophie, push! | 用力 苏菲 用力 |
[34:12] | You… you… you… | 你 你 你个贱人 |
[34:16] | you did this to me | 都是你的害的 |
[34:17] | with your gorgeous penis! | 用你让我爽翻天的肉棒害惨我 |
[34:22] | We’re both sorry! | 我跟他都很对不起 |
[34:24] | Max, anything else disgusting going on down there? | 麦克斯 下面还有什么恶心的状况吗 |
[34:28] | Oh, yeah, we got a real sick situation here. | 这下面的状况简直要恶心死人啊 |
[34:31] | Oh, man, there’s a lot of placenta goo. | 天啊 好多胎盘粘液 |
[34:37] | I haven’t been this woozy since I was in a Super Target. | 我上次这么晕是进了一家超大型廉价超市 |
[34:42] | I’m not going down. | 我不会晕倒的 |
[34:43] | I’m not going down. | 我打死不晕 |
[34:44] | The wet, sludgy baby is fighting through the slime! | 湿哒哒黏糊糊的宝宝正在努力通过粘液 |
[34:52] | Oh, girls, quick. | 姑娘们 快点 |
[34:54] | He’s down. Get the baby! | 他晕了 快去抱孩子过来 |
[35:01] | Oh, my God. All right. | 天啊 好了 |
[35:04] | All right, now, to wake him up, | 行了 现在把他弄醒吧 |
[35:06] | yell “Immigration” or tickle his… | 喊”移民局”或痒他的… |
[35:09] | Immigration! | 移民局来啦 |
[35:11] | What’d I miss? | 我错过什么了 |
[35:13] | Look, Oleg. | 你看 奥列格 |
[35:15] | The baby is here. | 宝宝生下来啦 |
[35:19] | And it’s a girl. | 是闺女 |
[35:21] | She has a bejoonie, just like her mama. | 她也有个小洞洞 就像她妈妈 |
[35:25] | She’s beautiful, just like her mama. | 她真漂亮 就像她妈妈 |
[35:28] | Yeah. | 是啊 |
[35:29] | Do you want to hold her? | 你想抱她吗 |
[35:31] | Yeah? | 真的吗 |
[35:33] | Yeah. | 真的 |
[35:39] | Look. | 你看 |
[35:42] | That’s your daddy. | 他是你爸爸 |
[35:43] | Let her get settled in the world | 等她熟悉了这世界 |
[35:45] | before you start giving her bad news. | 再开始告诉她坏消息吧 |
[35:48] | Hello, baby. | 宝宝 你好 |
[35:50] | Barbara! | 芭芭拉 |
[35:53] | Barbara Kuchenski Golishevsky! | 芭芭拉·科臣斯基·高列彻夫斯基 |
[35:57] | Oh, that sounds real musical, doesn’t it? | 听起来很有旋律感 对吧 |
[36:01] | Depends what kind of music you listen to. | 看你都听哪种音乐了 |
[36:04] | Aww, she’s so cute. | 她好可爱啊 |
[36:07] | Barbara’s a definite? | 真确定叫芭芭拉了吗 |
[36:09] | Yeah. | 对啊 |
[36:10] | I’m your godmother. | 我是你干妈 |
[36:12] | One day I’m gonna teach you how to lie to these two. | 有一天我会教你怎么撒谎骗这两人 |
[36:16] | And also this one. | 还有这个人 |
[36:22] | Look at all those people at our door. | 看看这么多人等在我们门外 |
[36:25] | And not a torch in the mix. | 而且没人带着火把要寻仇 |
[36:28] | Oh, Earl. Are you lost again? | 厄尔 你又走丢了吗 |
[36:30] | The diner is next door! | 餐厅是在隔壁 |
[36:34] | Don’t confuse him. He’s our bouncer. | 别害他搞混 他是我们酒吧看门人 |
[36:36] | You’re our bouncer! | 你是我们酒吧看门人 |
[36:38] | Now, you don’t really expect everybody on this list | 你不会真指望你名单上所有人 |
[36:41] | to show up, now, do you? | 都会出席开幕式吧 |
[36:42] | ‘Cause Liam Hemsworth and I are in a Twitter feud. | 利亚姆·海姆斯沃斯跟我微博上在撕逼呢 |
[36:46] | Okay, some of it may have been wishful thinking, | 好吧 名单上有几个的确是有点痴心妄想 |
[36:48] | but I did text 2 Chainz. | 但我给二链子发短信了 |
[36:51] | We met him on a private plane once. | 我们有一次跟他在私人飞机上遇见 |
[36:52] | I gave him my digits. | 我给了他我的号码 |
[36:54] | Uh, 2 Chainz, is that a person or a dress code? | 二链子 是人名还是种着装方式 |
[36:57] | It’s both. | 两者皆是 |
[37:01] | Earl, 2 Chainz is a famous rapper. | 厄尔 二链子是知名饶舌歌手 |
[37:04] | Oh, my God, 2 Chainz is here… ah! | 天啊 二链子来了 |
[37:07] | I’m letting 2 Chainz the famous rapper in before we open. | 我要让知名饶舌歌手二链子在我们开幕前进来 |
[37:14] | What’s up, Double C? | 最近好吗 琳琳 |
[37:16] | She prefers to be called, “New York’s Own Double C.” | 她比较喜欢被人称呼”纽约招牌大波琳妹妹” |
[37:20] | Sup? | 最近好吗 |
[37:21] | I can’t believe you made it to our dessert bar. | 真不敢相信你真的来我们甜品酒吧 |
[37:23] | I can’t believe anybody knows what a dessert bar is. | 我真不敢相信有人知道甜品酒吧是什么 |
[37:27] | Are you kidding? | 你在开玩笑吗 |
[37:28] | Sugar and alcohol go hand in hand. | 糖与酒最搭了 |
[37:30] | It’s two great tastes that taste great together. | 两种美妙滋味合而为一 |
[37:32] | Like how I seamlessly fuse new-school and old-school flows. | 就像我完美融合了新派与老派的旋律 |
[37:37] | Well, now I get it. | 现在我能理解了 |
[37:41] | Why didn’t you just say that, girls? | 你们为什么不这么跟我解释呢 |
[37:45] | Now, can I get one of those flan-tinis, please? | 我能来一杯果馅马丁尼吗 麻烦啦 |
[37:48] | Look, sorry I didn’t recognize you, 2 Chainz. | 二链子 抱歉我之前没认出你 |
[37:50] | I let my subscription to Vibe expire in 1984. | 我的音乐杂志1984年到期后就没续订了 |
[37:54] | Oh, that’s okay. | 没事的 |
[37:56] | I think they give discounts for return customers. | 他们好像有给回头客折扣 |
[37:58] | Oh, really? | 真的吗 |
[38:00] | Well, well, well! | 哎哟哟 |
[38:03] | Look who opened up a bar | 看看谁在我 |
[38:05] | after I denied them a liquor license. | 拒批许可证后开了家酒吧啊 |
[38:07] | Well, well, well, look who decided | 哎哟哟 看看是谁 |
[38:09] | to wear ladies’ pants hoping no one would notice. | 穿了女人裤子 还希望没人会发现啊 |
[38:13] | J. Petto, what are you doing here? | 劫佩托 你来干嘛 |
[38:15] | How did you know we were opening? | 你怎么知道我们今天开幕 |
[38:16] | I definitely didn’t give you a flyer. | 我绝对没给你发过传单 |
[38:18] | I follow 2 Chainz on Twitter, | 我有粉二链子的微博 |
[38:21] | sometimes in my car. | 有时候也在车里跟踪[粉]他 |
[38:24] | Just so you know, I have 911 on speed dial. | 告诉你 我一键就能打给警察 |
[38:29] | Our liquor license, sir. | 这是我们的酒水许可证 |
[38:32] | Uh, this belongs to the Williamsburg Diner. | 这是威廉斯堡餐厅的酒牌 |
[38:35] | They’re the same property. We own the diner. | 他们属于同家店 餐厅也是我们的 |
[38:37] | They’re related, | 两家店同出一脉 |
[38:38] | like Alec and whoever the grossest Baldwin is. | 就像帅大叔亚历克·鲍德温跟最丑的 |
[38:43] | Daniel. | 丹尼尔·鲍德温是兄弟 |
[38:45] | You can’t use another establishment’s liquor license. | 你不能用其他生意的酒水许可证 |
[38:48] | I’m shutting you two down | 我要勒令你们关闭 |
[38:50] | and I’m slapping the owner of the diner | 我还要罚款餐厅的老板 |
[38:52] | with a $25,000 fine. | 两万五千元罚款 |
[38:54] | Who is this bitch? | 这个贱人到底是谁 |
[38:58] | Just some mean, little man with | 就是个卑贱小人 |
[39:00] | nothing better to do on a Friday night than ruin our lives. | 大周五晚上没事干 就要跑来毁我们人生 |
[39:04] | Not true; I’m taking my aunt | 才不是 这里完事后我还得 |
[39:05] | to drag bingo right after this. | 带我阿姨去变性人宾果游戏呢 |
[39:08] | Well, girls, | 姑娘们 |
[39:11] | I managed to make it here after this dog fornicated | 这狗搞遍全绿点区的母狗后 |
[39:14] | his way across Greenpoint. | 才肯跟我过来这里 |
[39:17] | Been there. | 我去过 |
[39:18] | Done that. | 我搞过 |
[39:20] | Here’s $300. | 这里是三百块 |
[39:22] | My earnings after working 12 jobs | 这是我打了12份工 |
[39:25] | and being robbed 4 times. | 又被抢劫过4次后剩下的钱 |
[39:27] | Twice by the same girl. | 被同一个女的抢了两次 |
[39:31] | You can have your diner back. | 你可以要回你的餐厅 |
[39:33] | We feel bad about taking it from you, | 我们不忍心从你手里抢走餐厅 |
[39:34] | and also the owner of the diner owes | 而且餐厅的老板得付 |
[39:36] | old butt-chin here and the city $25,000. | 老屁股下巴哥跟市政府两万五罚款 |
[39:40] | What? | 什么 |
[39:41] | The diner is mine again? | 餐厅又是我的啦 |
[39:42] | Yeah, sorry. | 对啊 抱歉 |
[39:45] | Yes! | 太好啦 |
[39:46] | Yes! Yes! | 太好啦 太好啦 |
[39:48] | I have my baby back. | 我的宝宝又回到我手里啦 |
[39:50] | You have baby everything. | 你全身哪里不是宝宝大小 |
[39:52] | I’m shutting you down for 14 business days. | 我要勒令你们关门14个工作日 |
[39:56] | And you’re getting a bill in the mail | 而你会收到一封罚款信 |
[39:58] | with very confusing instructions. | 上面还会有非常让人不解的指示 |
[40:00] | And… | 还有 |
[40:02] | I’m having my birthday here. | 我要在这里办我的生日会 |
[40:05] | Let’s bounce, 2 Chainz. | 咱们走 二链子 |
[40:10] | So long, pal. | 再见啦 兄弟 |
[40:11] | You’re gonna have to find someone else to use as a chew toy. | 你得找别人来当你的磨牙玩具了 |
[40:16] | Oh, man. | 好吧 |
[40:18] | Sorry about the bar, girls. | 酒吧的事真遗憾啊 姑娘们 |
[40:20] | I mean, guess I’m gonna have to get me a bottle of rose | 看来我只能跟你外带瓶酒 |
[40:23] | and head over to Mrs. Fields’ again. | 然后去费尔斯太太饼干店里喝了 |
[40:27] | Does she have a sister? | 她有姐妹吗 |
[40:29] | Or a color TV? | 或者是彩色电视呢 |
[40:31] | See you later, girls. | 再见啦 姑娘们 |
[40:32] | It look like I’m gonna go party with the old man right here. | 看来我得跟这位老先生一起去派对啦 |
[40:40] | Can you guys just give us another minute? | 各位能再多等我们一会 |
[40:43] | Or 14 business days? | 或者14个工作日吗 |
[40:46] | The only thing that opened and closed faster than us | 唯一比我们还短命的大概只有 |
[40:48] | was Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot. | 不卖座电影《威士忌 探戈 狐步舞》了 |
[40:51] | Well, at least I didn’t get a blow out for this. | 幸好我没特别花钱去弄头发 |
[40:53] | That lessens the sting of a failed opening. | 让开幕失败所带来的伤痛轻了一点 |
[40:55] | Are you kidding? | 开什么玩笑 |
[40:56] | I think this is gonna make us more popular. | 我觉得这会让我们更炙手可热 |
[40:58] | You know how people always want what they can’t have. | 人永远都会想要他们得不到的东西 |
[41:01] | Like you with everything. | 就像你想要所有东西一样 |
[41:03] | If that’s true, then why do you look upset? | 如果这是真的 你为什么看起来很难过 |
[41:06] | ‘Cause Randy and I are really broken up. | 因为我跟兰迪真的彻底分手了 |
[41:09] | We burned through the Affleck-Garner clause, | 各种分分合合的明星夫妻条款 |
[41:12] | the Cox-Arquette addendum. | 或者招数都被我们拿来用过了 |
[41:14] | As soon as we got to the Bieber-Gomez principle, | 直到最终我们要用比伯跟戈麦斯原则时 |
[41:16] | we were ashamed of ourselves. | 我们都看不起自己了才结束 |
[41:19] | Max, you’re the queen of not following the rules. | 麦克斯 你可是破坏规矩界的女王 |
[41:21] | “Rules, schmules,” You say. | 你不是说”规矩 屁矩”吗 |
[41:23] | Yes! | 对啊 |
[41:24] | Rules, schmules! | 规矩 屁矩 |
[41:26] | And condoms, schmondoms. | 还有保险套 屁险套 |
[41:30] | Yeah, that one’s not great. | 这个就不怎么样 |
[41:32] | What I’m saying is you make stuff up. | 我的意思是你总自己想出新东西 |
[41:34] | Like this dessert bar. | 就像这个甜品酒吧 |
[41:35] | And that was a great idea. | 而这是个很棒的点子 |
[41:37] | So you should make up rules for you and Randy. | 所以你也应该为你和兰迪定个新规矩 |
[41:40] | ‘Cause it really seems like you guys care about each other. | 因为感觉你们真的很在乎彼此啊 |
[41:42] | Yeah, you’re right. | 好吧 你说得对 |
[41:44] | Break-up, schmake-up. | 分手 分屁手 |
[41:46] | Now, go call Randy | 去吧 打给兰迪 |
[41:47] | and make me want to burn my iPad. | 恶心到我想烧掉我的平板吧 |
[41:51] | Go, I’m begging you. | 去吧 求你了 |
[41:54] | Yeah, we’re gonna kill it | 我们绝对会大展宏图 |
[41:55] | in 14 business days. | 只要再等14个工作日就行了 |