| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | Okay, Max, here are the paint chips for our new dessert bar. | 麦克斯 这是我们甜品酒吧的油漆颜色图 |
| [00:04] | Don’t eat them. This isn’t your childhood. | 别吃掉 这不是你的童年 |
| [00:07] | These are all pink. | 全都是粉色 |
| [00:08] | You want the walls of our bar to be all pink? | 你希望我们甜品酒吧的墙是粉色吗 |
| [00:10] | It’ll be the first time someone drinks | 来店里喝酒顾客大概会是 |
| [00:12] | after they enter a vagina. | 史上首次进”阴道”里喝酒的人吧 |
| [00:15] | Oh, hey… no vagina in the dina. | 餐厅里不许出现”阴道”二字 |
| [00:19] | Or your apartment. Ever. | 你的公寓里也没有出现过”阴道” |
| [00:23] | You know, this isn’t Hooters. | 这里不是女服务员卖肉餐厅 |
| [00:25] | The v-bomb isn’t usually batted around the workplace. | 那种字眼通常不会随便出现在公共场合 |
| [00:29] | Speaking of batting things around, | 说到随便出现 |
| [00:31] | our cat wants you to come over again. | 我家喵星人想你再来一趟 |
| [00:34] | Yesterday you said your cat | 昨天你才说你家喵星人 |
| [00:35] | was too cool to hang out with me. | 太霸气 不屑与我为伍 |
| [00:39] | So which is it? | 所以到底是怎么样 |
| [00:41] | ‘Cause I am free tonight. | 因为我今晚还真的有空 |
| [00:55] | Hey, everybody! | 大家安安 |
| [01:01] | You know what today is? | 你们知道今天是什么日子吗 |
| [01:03] | I hope it ain’t the 15th, | 希望不是15号 |
| [01:05] | ’cause that means I missed dialysis. | 因为那意味着我错过做透析了 |
| [01:08] | No, I’m 20 weeks preggers. | 不是啦 是我怀孕满20周了 |
| [01:10] | And it’s time for Oleg and I to choose the godparents. | 是时候我和奥列格为孩子选干爹妈了 |
| [01:14] | You know, it’s an old Polish tradition. | 这是我们波兰的一个老传统之一 |
| [01:17] | Like pierogies and public hangings. | 就像波兰饺子与绞刑示众 |
| [01:21] | Godparents? | 干爹妈[上帝父母]吗 |
| [01:22] | God didn’t even give me parents-parents. | 上帝连真的爹妈都没给过我 |
| [01:25] | He just gave me some lady that took me home from the hospital | 他只给了我用影带出租店塑料袋 |
| [01:27] | in a Blockbuster Video bag. | 把我从医院装回家的女人 |
| [01:30] | It’s a big decision. | 这是个重大决定 |
| [01:31] | You have to pick a couple who would raise the child | 因为你得选一对跟你有相同信仰与价值观的 |
| [01:33] | with your beliefs and values. | 夫妇来当干爹妈 |
| [01:35] | And Hugh Hefner and whoever he’s banging | 但《花花公子》的老板和他的小蜜 |
| [01:37] | already said no. | 已经拒绝了我们 |
| [01:40] | Yeah, so I’m making a list. | 所以我在列张候选人表 |
| [01:42] | But Oleg doesn’t want anyone in prison. | 但奥列格不想要在监狱的人 |
| [01:45] | You know, so that knocks out most of the women in my family. | 所以我家族里的女人基本都被淘汰出局了 |
| [01:49] | You know, you guys could also have | 你们俩也可以在家 |
| [01:51] | these conversations at home. | 讨论这些话题啊 |
| [01:54] | But this counter is where they made the baby. | 但这个台子就是他们造人的地方 |
| [01:58] | Hey, Earl. | 你好啊 厄尔 |
| [01:59] | Oh, good, I need somebody strong. | 太好了 我正需要一名壮汉帮忙 |
| [02:03] | Uh, would you carry this over there, | 能麻烦你把这个搬到那里 |
| [02:07] | put some coffee in it, | 然后往里面加点咖啡 |
| [02:10] | and bring it back to me? | 然后再搬回来给我吗 |
| [02:15] | I’ll hot this up in a second. | 我很快就帮你搞定 |
| [02:17] | Just let me hot this one up first. | 先等我把这妞搞定就行 |
| [02:24] | What’re you doing here? | 你来干嘛呢 |
| [02:26] | I know you don’t like me to bother you during your free time, | 我知道你不喜欢我在你闲暇时间烦你 |
| [02:30] | but I missed you. | 但我想你了 |
| [02:31] | And I want to tell you something in person. | 而且我有事情想当面对你说 |
| [02:33] | Well, whatever it is, I probably have it too. | 无论是什么”病” 我估计也有 |
| [02:37] | And I probably had it first. | 而且估计比你早就染上了 |
| [02:40] | It’s not that. | 不是这种事 |
| [02:41] | But now I’m worried. | 但你说完我开始担心了 |
| [02:44] | No, I met with this law firm in Manhattan, | 我跟一家在曼哈顿的律师事务所谈了 |
| [02:46] | and they want to make me a partner. | 他们想让我成为合伙人 |
| [02:47] | They’re making you a partner? | 他们要让你成为合伙人[伴侣]吗 |
| [02:49] | Well, then they’re gonna catch it too. | 那估计他们也会”染上”了 |
| [02:53] | So, Randy, | 兰迪 |
| [02:54] | you really are a lawyer? | 你真的是律师啊 |
| [02:56] | I thought you just played lawyers in gay porn. | 我还以为你只是在基佬黄片里演过律师 |
| [03:02] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [03:03] | I will tell my trainer. | 我会告诉我的健身教练 |
| [03:05] | He was in gay porn. | 他倒是真拍过基佬黄片 |
| [03:08] | Hey, Buzz Lightyear, | 巴斯光年 |
| [03:10] | I’m still waiting for that coffee. | 我还在等那杯咖啡呢 |
| [03:14] | All right, well, I’ll be in my booth | 好啦 我去我的卡座坐了 |
| [03:16] | working on my godparent list. | 继续弄我的干爹妈列表 |
| [03:18] | And whoever we pick should be like one of those | 我们最后选的人 |
| [03:20] | perfect families on TV like, well, the Brady’s, | 一定会像电视上的完美家庭 比如《脱线家族》 |
| [03:25] | and the Huxtables… | 《天才老爹》 |
| [03:25] | 84-92年热播的情景喜剧《The Cosby Show》 《我爱我家》的导演就是受此剧的启发而拍摄 | |
| [03:27] | Or, you know what? Scratch that last one. | 算了 最后这部不要[主角为黑人一家] |
| [03:31] | Wow, if you’re considering moving to New York, | 如果你真的考虑要搬来纽约 |
| [03:33] | it must be a pretty good job. | 那个工作铁定很不错吧 |
| [03:34] | Well, there’s a couple other reasons. | 还有一些其他原因 |
| [03:37] | The bagels. | 好吃的百吉饼 |
| [03:38] | I have tickets to Hamilton in seven years. | 百老汇音乐剧《汉密尔顿》七年的票 |
| [03:42] | And there’s this girl here I kind of like. | 外加这里有个我还算喜欢的姑娘 |
| [03:44] | Who is she? I’ll kill her. | 她是谁 我去宰了她 |
| [03:47] | So two of the partners want to take me out tomorrow night | 其中两个合伙人明晚想带我 |
| [03:51] | to some fancy private dinner at someplace called Beak. | 去一家名叫”喙”的高档私人餐厅 |
| [03:54] | You’re going to Beak? | 你要去”喙”吗 |
| [03:55] | It’s hidden away in a private apartment, | 这餐厅隐藏在一间私人公寓里 |
| [03:58] | practically under the Williamsburg Bridge, | 就在威廉斯堡大桥的下方 |
| [04:00] | so you pretty much have to walk. | 所以基本上得走去 |
| [04:02] | How awful and chic is that? | 真是太糟糕太时髦了 |
| [04:05] | I read in Time Out that that place is so exclusive, | 我在杂志上读到 那地方特隐秘 |
| [04:07] | it’s technically not even a restaurant. | 基本上都算不上是家餐厅了 |
| [04:10] | Big deal. | 有啥了不起 |
| [04:11] | This diner gets called “Not a restaurant” all the time. | 这家餐厅也总被人说”算不上餐厅”啊 |
| [04:14] | Hey, did they tell you to just bring Max, | 他们有说只能带麦克斯吗 |
| [04:15] | or was it more of a “bring whoever”? | 还是随便你带人 |
| [04:19] | I’ll take that as a yes. | 我就当是可以随便带人了 |
| [04:21] | I’d love to join you at Beak tomorrow night. | 我十分乐意明天加入你们在”喙”的晚餐 |
| [04:23] | How could I say no to Beak? | 我怎么拒绝的了”喙”的诱惑 |
| [04:25] | It’s spring, so that’s peak Beak. | 春日时光 “喙” |
| [04:29] | So you want to go? | 你想去吗 |
| [04:30] | Want to be my date? | 想当我的女伴吗 |
| [04:31] | Nah, pass. | 表要 我不去 |
| [04:33] | Fancy restaurants are one of the three things I don’t do. | 三样我不愿意干的事情中 高档餐厅是一样 |
| [04:35] | You know the other two. | 另外两样你懂的 |
| [04:38] | Didn’t we blow past those week one? | 我们不是第一周的时候就全”干”了吗 |
| [04:41] | Max, are you crazy? | 麦克斯 你疯了吗 |
| [04:43] | Why, is one of my pupils getting all small? | 为啥 我的其中一个瞳孔又缩小了吗 |
| [04:47] | It happens now. I don’t know why. | 它现在无缘无故就这样 我也不知道为什么 |
| [04:49] | What was that out there? | 你刚才是在干嘛 |
| [04:50] | “Nah, pass.” | “表要 我不去” |
| [04:52] | Randy’s not just asking you to dinner-dinner. | 兰迪不仅仅是单纯邀请你去吃饭 |
| [04:54] | This isn’t about food. | 重点不是食物 |
| [04:55] | It’s about your future together. | 是你们在一起的未来 |
| [04:57] | He’s moving here for you. | 他要为你搬来这里 |
| [04:59] | You just “Naw pass” -ed on Randy. | 而你说”表要 我不去”拒绝了兰迪 |
| [05:03] | Weird, I didn’t love your impression the first time, | 怪了 你第一次模仿我时我不喜欢 |
| [05:05] | but I loved it the second. | 但第二次我超喜欢呢 |
| [05:08] | Randy’s moving here for a job. | 兰迪搬来是因为工作 |
| [05:10] | This dinner isn’t about some law partners. | 这顿饭主题不是什么律师合伙人 |
| [05:12] | It’s about you and him as partners. | 而是你和他要”合伙”了 |
| [05:15] | Do you hear words I don’t? | 是我有漏听他说了什么话吗 |
| [05:17] | You’re going to that dinner, young lady, | 那顿晚餐你必须得去 小姑娘 |
| [05:19] | end of discussion. | 别争了 |
| [05:20] | Oh, that was so mom-ish! | 这话好有妈妈范儿啊 |
| [05:23] | I wouldn’t know. I’ve never met one. | 我不知道 我没见过妈 |
| [05:35] | Oh, good, this is it. | 太好了 是这里 |
| [05:37] | We knocked on another apartment door, | 我们敲错了另一家的门 |
| [05:38] | but the only thing they were cooking was meth. | 他们唯一在做的东西是冰毒 |
| [05:41] | We walked across a bridge for this? | 我们徒步走过大桥就为了这个吗 |
| [05:44] | This is basically my apartment, | 这跟我的公寓唯一差别是 |
| [05:45] | except our wild birds are alive. | 我家的野鸟都是活的 |
| [05:48] | Randy, you made it. | 兰迪 你成功啦 |
| [05:50] | And I mean, you made it because you’re eating at Beak. | 不是说功成名就 是说你成功能在这吃饭 |
| [05:54] | I mean, the wait list here is longer | 排队要吃这里的名单 |
| [05:55] | than an episode of HBO’s Vinyl. | 比又臭又长的HBO剧《黑胶时代》还长 |
| [05:58] | Max, this is Marissa, one of the partners. | 麦克斯 这位是玛丽莎 其中一位合伙人 |
| [06:00] | Marissa, this is Max. | 玛丽莎 这位是麦克斯 |
| [06:01] | She’s my girlfriend. | 她是我女朋友 |
| [06:03] | Max? Cute. | 麦克斯吗 这名字挺好 |
| [06:04] | Is that short for Maxine? | 是麦克儿欣恩的短称吗 |
| [06:05] | Technically, it’s long for “Meh.” | 其实应该是”咩”的长称 |
| [06:09] | Sorry, I don’t get it. | 抱歉 没懂你意思 |
| [06:10] | Probably because of the Klonopin I had to take | 可能是我吃了镇静剂 |
| [06:12] | when that homeless man tried to talk to me on the way in. | 因为刚才在来的路上 有流浪汉想跟我说话 |
| [06:15] | Uh, Max, this is Leila, another partner at the firm, | 麦克斯 这位是蕾拉 事务所另一位合伙人 |
| [06:18] | and her wife, Lei. | 还有她夫人 蕾 |
| [06:20] | She’s not just my wife. | 她不止是我夫人 |
| [06:22] | She’s also a star on Instagram. | 还是图片分享网的网红 |
| [06:24] | See? I talk about your accomplishments. | 你看 我也跟别人说你的成就啊 |
| [06:28] | I put wigs on statues | 我给雕像戴假发 |
| [06:31] | and then photograph them from behind. | 然后从背后给它们拍照 |
| [06:36] | That’s it? | 就这样吗 |
| [06:37] | That’s it. | 就这样 |
| [06:41] | Max… | 麦克斯 |
| [06:42] | are you a lawyer too? | 你也是律师吗 |
| [06:44] | Uh, no, but I presided over a food court or two in my day. | 不是 但我也曾负责过一两个饮食区[食物法庭] |
| [06:48] | Max and her partner, Caroline, | 麦克斯与她的同伴 卡洛琳 |
| [06:49] | are in the process of opening a dessert bar. | 正在筹备开一家甜品酒吧 |
| [06:51] | And I don’t mean “partner” in the romantic sense. | 她那个”同伴”指的不是情侣的那种 |
| [06:53] | I’ve got that department covered. | 这部分是我的地盘 |
| [06:56] | Well, welcome, Randy and Max. | 欢迎你们 兰迪与麦克斯 |
| [06:57] | You know, I’ve been hoping to add another | 我一直希望我们事务所的小团体中 |
| [06:59] | straight couple to the law firm mix, | 能多一对异性恋情侣 |
| [07:01] | but, you know, they’re so hard to find nowadays. | 但这年头这真是不好找 |
| [07:05] | Lei and I met on an | 蕾跟我是在 |
| [07:05] | Orange is the New Black message board. | 《女子监狱》的留言板认识的 |
| [07:09] | It’s kind of become the lesbian Tinder. | 那留言板有点类似拉拉的约炮软件 |
| [07:12] | Uh, Randy, wasn’t there rumor of a third? | 兰迪 你好像说还有第三个人吗 |
| [07:15] | Oh, I keep pitching that, | 我一直跟他这么建议 |
| [07:16] | but he “likes me too much.” | 但他”太爱我一个人” |
| [07:19] | Again, don’t quite get it. | 抱歉 我又没懂 |
| [07:21] | Little hazy. | 吃了药有些晕 |
| [07:23] | Well, I’ll have to tell the chef he’s preparing | 我得去告诉大厨 因为他就准备了 |
| [07:25] | oyster foam for six. | 六人份的蚝泡 |
| [07:26] | I’m sorry, “Oyster foam”? | 抱歉什么”蚝泡” |
| [07:29] | Foam from an oyster? | 蚝的泡沫吗 |
| [07:31] | That sounds delicious. | 听起来就”好吃”啊 |
| [07:34] | I know your idea of fine dining | 我知道你所认为的高级料理 |
| [07:37] | is a ham and cheese Hot Pocket, | 是芝士火腿馅饼 |
| [07:39] | but I am really glad you came. | 但我真的很高兴你能来 |
| [07:40] | Oh, here’s Lenin. | 这位是列宁 |
| [07:41] | Um, Randy, Max, this is Lenin. | 兰迪 麦克斯 这位是列宁 |
| [07:44] | He’s the chef. And my lover. | 他是这里的厨师 也是我爱人 |
| [07:52] | We have sex too. | 我们也啪啪啪啊 |
| [07:56] | Lei and I are “post sex.” | 我跟蕾是”后性爱” |
| [07:58] | All intimacy, no penetration. | 各种亲密 但是不”进出” |
| [08:05] | I’ll be serving a meal of seven bird-themed courses, | 等会我将会上七道禽类主题的餐点 |
| [08:08] | each one it’s own unique flight of fancy. | 每一道都含有独特的飞行幻想 |
| [08:11] | Not my words, a very giggly Anderson Cooper. | 不是我的话 是咯咯笑的帅哥名主播说的 |
| [08:14] | Now, before we begin, do either of you | 在我们开始前 你们两个人 |
| [08:16] | have any food allergies? | 有对任何食物过敏吗 |
| [08:17] | Just one, birds. | 就一种东西 禽类 |
| [08:21] | I don’t get her, either. | 我也不懂她 |
| [08:23] | Let’s all sit. | 大家请坐 |
| [08:25] | Max. | 麦克斯 |
| [08:28] | Why do you want me to sit that far from the table? | 你为什么想要我坐得远离桌子 |
| [08:31] | That’s me being polite. | 这是有礼的举动 |
| [08:36] | You are in for such a treat. | 你们这趟绝对不枉此行 |
| [08:39] | Lenin is a real artist. | 列宁是个真正的艺术家 |
| [08:41] | He spends all day making these | 他整天醉心于制作这些 |
| [08:42] | teeny-tiny, delicate little meals, | 屁点儿大又好吃的小料理 |
| [08:45] | which is why I pay our rent. | 所以房租都得我来付 |
| [08:50] | Our first course is a French delicacy. | 我们第一道菜是法国佳肴 |
| [08:53] | The Ortolan Bunting bird, roasted and eaten whole. | 鸟名为”圃鹀” 烤熟了 可整只吃 |
| [08:58] | Just grasp the bird by its head and start eating at the feet. | 抓住它的头 从脚部开始吃吧 |
| [09:02] | Enjoy. Obviously. | 好好享受 肯定的 |
| [09:10] | Can’t wait to get that bird foot in my mouth. | 真是”等不及”把那鸟脚放进我嘴里呢 |
| [09:20] | How’s the baby pigeon and oyster foam, Max? | 麦克斯 乳鸽跟耗泡如何 |
| [09:22] | Oh, delicious. | 太好吃了 |
| [09:23] | It’s amazing how full babies can make you. | 真没想到鸟宝宝也能让人这么饱 |
| [09:28] | No, Lei, way too many photos of me eating foam. | 别拍了 蕾 拍太多我吃泡沫的照片了 |
| [09:32] | Like a rabid dog. | 我就像口吐白沫的狂犬病狗 |
| [09:38] | Oh, good. This is it. | 太好了 是这里 |
| [09:40] | The guy who opened the other apartment door | 刚才我敲错门 开门的人 |
| [09:41] | wasn’t wearing pants. | 没穿裤子 |
| [09:43] | Or underwear. | 也没穿内裤 |
| [09:45] | Or was circumcised. | 也没有割包皮 |
| [09:47] | Hi! I’m here. | 我到了 |
| [09:49] | What did I miss? | 我错过[没懂]什么了 |
| [09:50] | The point of literally every movie we see together. | 我们看过的每一部电影的中心思想 |
| [09:54] | Marissa, this is Caroline, Max’s business partner. | 玛丽莎 这是卡洛琳 麦克斯的生意伙伴 |
| [09:57] | She texted she was coming. | 她发过短信说她会来 |
| [09:58] | She’s usually not covered in this much sweat. | 她通常不会这么大汗淋漓 |
| [10:01] | Sorry, I had to run across the bridge, | 抱歉 我是跑步跑过大桥 |
| [10:03] | ’cause you need a credit card for one of those city bikes. | 因为公共自行车需要有信用卡才能租用 |
| [10:05] | Um, if I had a credit card, | 如果我都有信用卡了 |
| [10:06] | why would I be riding a damn bike? | 我为毛还要骑自行车啊 |
| [10:09] | I’m at Beak. I’m trendy again! | 我来到”喙” 姐又时尚了 |
| [10:13] | Fifth course. | 第五道菜 |
| [10:14] | Tiny poached noisy scrubbird with fiddle ferns | 小嘈杂薮鸟配蕨菜 |
| [10:18] | and fermented egg. | 外加皮蛋 |
| [10:19] | Oh, that sounds so gross. I bet it’s great. | 听起来就好恶心 一定很好吃 |
| [10:24] | Max, eat. | 麦克斯 吃啊 |
| [10:26] | I sure will. | 会的会的 |
| [10:28] | When I used to watch Tweety Bird, | 小时候看卡通崔弟鸟时 |
| [10:29] | all I could think was, “God, that looks delicious.” | 我一直都是想着”它一定很好吃” |
| [10:34] | You’re doing great. | 你已经做得很好了 |
| [10:36] | Who wants some more wine? | 谁要再来点酒 |
| [10:37] | I’m guessing Max. | 我猜麦克斯想要 |
| [10:40] | I can’t believe we’re here, | 真不敢相信我们在这里 |
| [10:41] | eating the finest… what’d he say this was? | 吃着最上等的… 他说这是啥鸟 |
| [10:44] | Blue jay? | 冠蓝鸦吗 |
| [10:46] | Aren’t you proud of me? | 你不为我骄傲吗 |
| [10:47] | I got through the first four courses. | 我成功撑过了四道菜[门课]呢 |
| [10:49] | That’s more courses than I finished in high school. | 我高中都没撑过这么多门课 |
| [10:53] | Oh, look at this pretentious, | 瞧瞧这做作 |
| [10:55] | deliberately relaxed large napkin. | 故意随意摆放的大餐巾 |
| [10:57] | Love it and hate it. | 真是让人又爱又恨 |
| [11:01] | What is that? | 那是什么 |
| [11:02] | This first four courses! | 前面四道菜 |
| [11:04] | I cheated, like in high school! | 跟在高中一样 我作弊了 |
| [11:06] | I couldn’t eat it; it’s gross. | 我吃不下去 太恶心了 |
| [11:08] | No, gross is when you hand the guy at Del Taco | 不 你给墨西哥卷饼店那家伙65美分 |
| [11:11] | 65 cents and tell him to surprise you. | 让他给你的惊喜 那才叫”恶心” |
| [11:14] | You are judging me for not eating most of my | 你居然因为我不愿吃每周六上午 |
| [11:16] | Saturday morning cartoon lineup? | 我爱看的卡通人物而批评我 |
| [11:18] | You want to chomp down on Foghorn Leghorn? | 你想咬一口大公鸡莱亨吗 |
| [11:21] | When a great guy like Randy is moving to New York for you, | 当像兰迪这么棒的男人为了你而搬来纽约 |
| [11:25] | yes, you have to eat your childhood favorites! | 你必须硬着头皮 把你童年的最爱吃下去 |
| [11:29] | Anyone like to come see the de-spining | 谁先过来看怎么把小喇叭鸟 |
| [11:31] | of the tiny trumpeter bird? | 的脊椎抽掉吗 |
| [11:33] | This could push me over a million followers. | 这没准会让我粉丝突破一百万 |
| [11:37] | I can’t eat that, Caroline. | 我吃不下去 卡洛琳 |
| [11:39] | And I have nowhere to put it. | 现在我也没有地方塞了 |
| [11:40] | My bra is at crazy capacity. | 我的胸罩已经超载了 |
| [11:43] | The fire marshal almost kicked out my left boob. | 消防员都要因为场地太满 把我左乳踢走了 |
| [11:46] | Why can’t you just try it? | 你为何不能直接尝一口呢 |
| [11:48] | You’ve had worse things in your mouth. | 你嘴里肯定塞进过更恶心的东西 |
| [11:52] | He’s moving here to be with you. | 他是为了你搬来这里 |
| [11:54] | He’s moving here for a job. | 他是为了工作搬来这里 |
| [11:56] | Look, whatever comes next, | 听着 无论接下来是什么 |
| [11:57] | just put it in your mouth and eat it. | 都给我塞进嘴巴里 吃掉它 |
| [11:59] | Well, I did not know the bird was gonna be alive. | 我都不知道那只鸟还是活生生的 |
| [12:01] | Worst part? Making eye contact. | 最糟糕的部分是 跟它对视 |
| [12:06] | Creamed kimchi | 奶油泡菜 |
| [12:08] | and pelican tongue with Asian pear. | 鹈鹕舌头配亚洲梨 |
| [12:11] | Enjoy. | 请享用 |
| [12:12] | The least you can do is swallow a little tongue. | 你至少可以吞下一小条舌头吧 |
| [12:16] | Tongue swallowing? Foam? | 吞舌头 嘴沾白沫 |
| [12:17] | This isn’t a restaurant; it’s a heroin overdose. | 这不是餐厅 这是吸毒过量 |
| [12:23] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
| [12:32] | Good for you, Max! | 好样的 麦克斯 |
| [12:33] | This is real growth. | 这才是真正的成长 |
| [12:36] | Is it bad I feel like the tongue is tasting me back? | 我感觉那舌头也在品尝我 是不是不太好啊 |
| [12:48] | Max, you look sweaty. | 麦克斯 你在冒汗 |
| [12:50] | Like when you try to do math. | 就像你试图算数时一样 |
| [12:54] | I think that tongue is looking for an exit. | 我觉得那舌头正在我体内寻找出口 |
| [12:58] | Randy, we’re really excited for you to come work with us. | 兰迪 我们十分兴奋你能与我们一起共事 |
| [13:01] | How fast can you move to New York? | 你能多快速搬来纽约 |
| [13:02] | Not as fast as I have to get to that bathroom. | 那也比不上我去厕所的速度快 |
| [13:07] | Excuse us, | 失陪了 |
| [13:08] | we have to go to the little sparrow’s room. | 我们得去下小麻雀的房间 |
| [13:11] | Nope, it’s cool, false alarm. | 不用了 没事 虚惊一场 |
| [13:13] | Nope, real alarm. Very real alarm. | 不 是真的 超级无敌真 |
| [13:15] | – Should I come in with you? – No! | -要我跟你进去吗 -不用 |
| [13:17] | Even I don’t want to go in there! | 甚至连我自己都不想进去 |
| [13:20] | I doubt this door is soundproof, so talk loud. | 我怀疑这门不隔音 所以你讲话大声点 |
| [13:22] | Just start with your normal volume, | 先从你正常的音调开始 |
| [13:24] | and then dial it down a notch. | 然后再小声一点 就是大声了 |
| [13:27] | Oh, Marissa! | 玛丽莎 |
| [13:29] | You have to tell me | 快告诉我 |
| [13:30] | where you found these fabulous glasses. | 这些漂亮的玻璃杯在哪儿买的 |
| [13:36] | Restoration Hardware? | 是新复古品牌A |
| [13:37] | Crate and Barrel? | 还是美式现代品牌B |
| [13:41] | Restoration Hardware Modern? | 抑或新复古现代品牌C |
| [13:42] | West Elm? CB2? | 贵版宜家D 年轻现代E |
| [13:43] | CB3? Is there one of those yet? | 还是无品牌F 没有一个中的吗 |
| [13:46] | You know what? Let’s get some music going! | 要不 我们放点音乐吧 |
| [13:48] | Like some really loud dubstep, | 放那种特别大声的电子乐 |
| [13:49] | ’cause I’m running out of breath. | 因为我要喘不上气了 |
| [13:51] | Oh, there’s no music allowed here. | 这里不让放音乐 |
| [13:53] | It would get in the way of hearing | 这样我们就听不到品尝食物时 |
| [13:54] | the symphony of taste. | 口中的交响曲了 |
| [13:57] | Not my words. | 听别人说的 |
| [13:58] | Okay, they were my words. | 好吧 其实是我自己说的 |
| [14:00] | I think I’d like to make a toast. | 我想举杯致敬 |
| [14:02] | Oh, no, please don’t make a toast. | 不 拜托不要这样做 |
| [14:03] | I’ve begun not to like you. | 我已经开始不喜欢你了 |
| [14:12] | Seriously, Lenin. | 说真的 列宁 |
| [14:13] | Not even a little light piano? | 连轻柔的钢琴曲都不行吗 |
| [14:15] | You don’t need to reinvent the freaking wheel here. | 又不是让你做多费劲的事 |
| [14:18] | Hey, Caroline, please. Just sit. | 卡洛琳 拜托 快坐下 |
| [14:19] | You know what, I see if I have another Klonopin. | 我找找看还有没有镇静剂 |
| [14:21] | – I’m fine. – It’s not for you. | -我不需要 -不是给你的 |
| [14:24] | Caroline. | 卡洛琳 |
| [14:25] | Should I go in there? | 我该进去看看吗 |
| [14:26] | ‘Cause I am not hearing the standard | 因为我没听见标准的那套 |
| [14:28] | tinkle and a hand wash. | 嘘嘘声和洗手声 |
| [14:31] | No, don’t move. Stay there. | 不 别动 坐着就好 |
| [14:32] | That noise is just the pipes backing up a little. | 那噪音只是水管有点堵而已 |
| [14:35] | Well, a lot. | 非常堵 |
| [14:40] | Oh, Lord! | 上帝啊 |
| [14:42] | They’re young. | 年轻人嘛 |
| [14:47] | My camera needs to be in there. | 我得进去拍 |
| [14:49] | Enough with the camera! | 不要拍了 |
| [14:50] | I’m alive! | 你也要搭理下我这个活物吧 |
| [14:55] | Max. | 麦克斯 |
| [14:58] | Where are you going? | 你要去哪里 |
| [14:59] | Anywhere but here! | 离开这里 |
| [15:02] | Max, seriously! | 麦克斯 别闹了 |
| [15:04] | What’s going on in there? | 里面到底什么状况 |
| [15:05] | Everything’s okay in here! | 里面一切都好 |
| [15:06] | We’ll be out in a minute. | 我们马上出去 |
| [15:09] | If you’re not gonna let me in, at least… | 如果不让我进去 那至少也… |
| [15:16] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
| [15:17] | Wait up! | 等等 |
| [15:19] | You don’t have to be embarrassed in front of me. | 你无需在我面前觉得丢脸 |
| [15:21] | I’ve seen worse. | 我见过更糟的 |
| [15:24] | Okay, no I haven’t. | 好吧 我没有 |
| [15:26] | Just go away! | 你走开啦 |
| [15:27] | I can’t take that sad look. | 我受不了你那个悲哀的表情 |
| [15:29] | It’s the same look you gave Chestnut | 上次栗宝把屎拉在沙发上 |
| [15:30] | that time he crapped on the couch. | 你也是这个表情 |
| [15:33] | I’m fine alone; you didn’t have to leave. | 我一个人能行 你不用跟出来 |
| [15:35] | No, I did. | 不 我必须出来 |
| [15:36] | They couldn’t possibly think one person | 他们一定认为那不可能是 |
| [15:38] | was responsible for all that. | 一个人的呕吐量 |
| [15:41] | Plus, I don’t want to leave you. | 再说了 我不想扔下你 |
| [15:42] | You’re sick. | 你不舒服 |
| [15:43] | I think it’s beyond sick. | 比不舒服严重多了 |
| [15:45] | I lost bone mass in there. | 我把骨质都吐出来了 |
| [15:48] | My shoes are too big now. | 我现在鞋子都嫌大了 |
| [15:51] | I’m so embarrassed! | 真是好丢脸啊 |
| [15:52] | Hey, it happens. | 这是常有的事 |
| [15:54] | You got a stomach ache. | 你肚子疼而已 |
| [15:55] | You’re just not used to rich food. | 你只是不习惯吃有钱人吃的食物 |
| [15:57] | I’m not used to rich anything. | 我不习惯有钱人的任何玩意 |
| [15:59] | And if this is Randy’s world… | 如果兰迪的世界是这样… |
| [16:01] | uh, bird bones and pretentious people… | 鸟骨头和做作的人们 |
| [16:04] | then maybe my body is telling me I can’t take it. | 那或许我的身体在告诉我 我接受不了 |
| [16:09] | Max, if I got used to buying earrings at the AMPM, | 麦克斯 如果我能习惯在便利店买耳环 |
| [16:13] | you can get used to fancy food and pretentious people. | 那你也能习惯精美的食物 做作的人们 |
| [16:15] | You don’t get it! | 你不明白 |
| [16:16] | He is moving here for me. | 他是为了我才搬来这里 |
| [16:19] | Oh, do you think so? | 是哦 你也这么觉得吗 |
| [16:21] | I wish your best friend | 真希望你的好闺蜜 |
| [16:22] | had been telling you that for two days. | 在过去两天有跟你一直念叨这件事 |
| [16:24] | He’s moving his whole life. | 他要把他整个人生搬来这里 |
| [16:26] | I don’t know how to do that. | 我不知道该怎么办 |
| [16:27] | I didn’t even know how to react when he moved my chair for me. | 就连他给我搬椅子时 我都不知道该作何反应 |
| [16:31] | You were right, it’s not about the food; | 你说得对 这无关食物 |
| [16:32] | it’s about our future, | 这事关我们的未来 |
| [16:33] | and I just vomited all over our future. | 而我刚吐了我们的未来一脸 |
| [16:38] | What? | 干嘛 |
| [16:40] | I hate to say this, but you need a mint. | 我很不想这么说 但你需要来一颗薄荷糖 |
| [16:43] | Sorry, I love you, but you need a mint. | 抱歉 我爱你 但你需要来一颗薄荷糖 |
| [16:46] | I need to disappear. | 我需要消失 |
| [16:48] | What do you think of the name Sheila Newman? | 你觉得希拉·纽曼[新生]这名字怎么样 |
| [16:52] | Max! | 麦克斯 |
| [16:53] | Randy. | 兰迪 |
| [16:54] | Great, just in time to see me jump. | 太棒了 正好赶上看我跳下去 |
| [16:58] | What happened? Where’d you go? | 怎么回事 你们去哪儿了 |
| [16:59] | Oh, I jumped on that bike so fast, | 我太快跳上自行车 |
| [17:00] | my man parts are no longer talking to me. | 我的”兄弟们”再也不会跟我说话了 |
| [17:03] | She didn’t want to be sick in front of you. | 她不舒服 不想被你看见 |
| [17:06] | You got sick? | 你不舒服吗 |
| [17:08] | Okay, fine, we all heard it. | 好啦 我们都听见了 |
| [17:10] | But why did you leave without saying something? | 但你为什么一句话不说就走了 |
| [17:12] | Because words were the only thing | 因为话语是唯一一样 |
| [17:14] | not coming out of my mouth. | 不会从我嘴巴出来的东西 |
| [17:17] | Max? | 麦克斯 |
| [17:20] | You’re not gonna look at me? | 你不看着我吗 |
| [17:21] | I can’t. | 我不能 |
| [17:23] | Wait, here. | 等等 给 |
| [17:25] | Now she can. | 现在她能了 |
| [17:26] | You better get back there. | 你最好快回去 |
| [17:28] | I don’t want you to lose that job. | 我不想你失去这份工作 |
| [17:29] | I don’t want that job. | 我不想要这份工作 |
| [17:31] | I don’t know how many more pills Marissa took, | 我都不知道玛丽莎吃了多少药 |
| [17:33] | but she passed out in a pot of clam steam. | 但她晕倒在一锅清蒸蛤蜊里 |
| [17:36] | I missed clam steam? | 我错过了清蒸蛤蜊吗 |
| [17:38] | I’ve been reading about his clam steam. | 杂志上老提他做的清蒸蛤蜊 |
| [17:40] | Please stop saying “clam steam.” | 拜托不要再说”清蒸蛤蜊” |
| [17:42] | I can actually smell the words. | 我都可以闻得到这四个字的味儿了 |
| [17:45] | Okay, Max. | 好吧 麦克斯 |
| [17:46] | You are starting to turn green again, | 你又开始面如菜色了 |
| [17:48] | so why don’t you hop on, and I will ride you home | 要不你坐上来 我会骑自行车送你回家 |
| [17:51] | on my bicycle like a real man. | 像个爷们一样载你 |
| [17:53] | I don’t know, Randy. | 我不知道 兰迪 |
| [17:54] | A lot of stuff came up for me at that dinner. | 一顿饭的时间 很多东西涌上来 |
| [17:56] | And I’m not just talking about | 我不止是说 |
| [17:57] | every single thing I ate this year. | 我今年吃过的每一样东西 |
| [18:01] | I mean, maybe I’m not right for you. | 或许我不适合你 |
| [18:06] | Don’t be so hard on yourself about tonight. | 今晚的事 你别太苛责自己了 |
| [18:08] | I mean, look at me. | 你看我 |
| [18:09] | I’m not brave enough to eat in that diner. | 我也没有勇气去你打工的餐厅吃饭啊 |
| [18:12] | Come here, you. | 过来 |
| [18:14] | Maybe wait another 60 seconds. | 或许再等60秒会更好 |
| [18:19] | I think we are different. | 我知道我们不一样 |
| [18:21] | But we kind of go together. | 但我们也算合拍 |
| [18:23] | Like peppered baby bird bladder and pesto. | 就像撒胡椒的幼鸟膀胱和香蒜酱 |
| [18:27] | Oh, no. Oh, no. | 完蛋了 完蛋了 |
| [18:28] | Oh, my God. | 天啊 |
| [18:30] | That’s gonna do it! | 我要吐了 |
| [18:37] | Wrong night to be driving a convertible. | 今晚开敞篷车真是中了”大奖”啊 |
| [18:41] | Oh, wait… no, no, no, no, no, no. | 等等 别跳别跳 |
| [18:52] | So how’s your first diner burger? | 你第一个餐厅汉堡如何啊 |
| [18:55] | It’s not bad. | 还不错 |
| [18:57] | I’m getting a little something. | 好像有吃到什么 |
| [18:58] | Um… mesquite? | 豆子吗[跟蚊子谐音] |
| [19:00] | Yeah, they die in the fan | 是啊 他们被灭蚊器弄死 |
| [19:02] | and then fall on the grill. | 然后尸体掉到了烤肉架上 |
| [19:05] | I’ll take mosquito burger over pelican any day. | 我宁愿吃蚊子汉堡也不吃鹈鹕 |
| [19:09] | Interesting, Randy. | 真有意思 兰迪 |
| [19:10] | You get two waitresses paying attention to you | 有两名服务员在专心服务你 |
| [19:13] | and most people get none. | 而大多数人一个都没有 |
| [19:16] | Like that one over there, | 就像那边那个 |
| [19:18] | over there, and that gentleman over there | 还有那边 以及那边那个男士 |
| [19:20] | who’s just giving up and leaving. | 等得不耐烦 都要走了 |
| [19:22] | Fine, Han, we will go over to the counter | 行了 阿憨 我们去吧台边上 |
| [19:24] | and continue to talk. | 继续聊天了 |
| [19:28] | I know I say a lot of stuff about you, | 我知道我老说你 |
| [19:31] | especially to your face, | 尤其爱当面说你 |
| [19:33] | but thank you for your help last night. | 但谢谢你昨晚的帮忙 |
| [19:35] | I know you would have done the same thing for me. | 我知道你也会为我做同样的事 |
| [19:37] | But if I ever get that sick, | 但如果我有这么不舒服 |
| [19:39] | you have my permission to kill me. | 我准许你杀了我 |
| [19:40] | I mean, when you went into that toilet, looking for my earring, | 当你走进那间厕所 为我找掉了的耳环时 |
| [19:44] | I knew I had found my post-sex partner. | 我就知道我找到了我的后性爱伴侣 |
| [19:47] | You did that for her? | 你居然为她这么做吗 |
| [19:51] | And all this time, we’ve been looking for | 一直以来 我们在寻找完美的一对 |
| [19:54] | the perfect couple to be godparents, | 给我们孩子当干爹妈 |
| [19:57] | and they’re right under our noses. | 而她们就在我们眼皮底下 |
| [20:01] | Girl-on-girl godparents. | 女女干娘 |
| [20:03] | I like it. | 我喜欢 |
| [20:05] | You two girls are gonna be great with the baby. | 你们俩姑娘一定能跟我宝宝好好相处 |
| [20:08] | I mean, Caroline, | 我是说 卡洛琳 |
| [20:10] | you were elbow-deep in Max’s upchuck. | 你半只胳膊伸进去掏麦克斯的呕吐物 |
| [20:13] | I mean, I wouldn’t even do that for my own father | 我都不会愿意为我亲爹这么做 |
| [20:15] | when he swallowed all those bees. | 当时他吞下了一堆蜜蜂 |
| [20:18] | Wow, Sophie, this is such a huge compliment. | 苏菲 这真是对我莫大的夸奖 |
| [20:21] | Tucked away in a terrible personal memory. | 虽然是夹在一个可怕的个人回忆里面 |
| [20:25] | Well, if something would ever happen to us, | 如果我们俩出了什么事 |
| [20:28] | let Max do the breast feeding. | 让麦克斯来喂奶 |
| [20:31] | ‘Cause, yeah, I don’t want the kid to starve. | 因为我可不想我的小孩饿死 |
| [20:35] | This is exciting! | 这真让人兴奋 |
| [20:36] | Randy, I’m gonna be a godfather. | 兰迪 我要当干爹啦 |
| [20:39] | And equally as exciting, | 同样让人兴奋的是 |
| [20:40] | I’m gonna be climbing out of that bathroom window | 我也要从那个厕所的窗户爬出去啦 |
| [20:42] | in about two minutes. | 就在差不多两分钟后开爬 |