时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:08] | Shit! | 靠 |
[00:11] | Bitch, it’s 10:04! | 贱人 已经10点04分了 |
[00:12] | I overslept! I packed my alarm! | 我睡过头了 我把闹钟也装行李箱了 |
[00:13] | I’ll change so fast! | 我马上换衣 |
[00:15] | No bra! Save time! | 别穿胸罩 节约时间 |
[00:17] | – It’s 10:44. – Okay, we got this. | -10点44了 -我们可以的 |
[00:19] | I am not letting you miss your last NYCBEC, bitch! | 我不会让你错过你最后一次吃纽约培蛋奶三明治 贱人 |
[00:28] | I think we might get it, dude! | 我觉得我们有希望赶到 |
[00:31] | Oh, Jesus Christ. | 老天 |
[00:32] | Okay. Come on, sister. | 快起来 姐妹 |
[00:33] | Come on. We don’t got time! | 快 我们没时间了 |
[00:38] | Ma’ams, children are dying! | 女士们 儿童在死亡 |
[00:39] | Ilana, cat pass! | 阿拉娜 学猫过人 |
[00:41] | They’re starving! They’re so hungry! | 他们挨饿 他们饥肠辘辘 |
[00:43] | You need to feed them! | 你得给他们食物 |
[00:44] | From the moment they’re born, they’re dying! | 他们从出生那刻 就在死亡 |
[00:47] | This isn’t the end! | 这不是结束 |
[00:49] | Get us! | 来抓我们啊 |
[00:50] | We’re almost there. We’re so close. Yes. | 就快到了 快了 是的 |
[00:51] | Get ready for the best bacon, egg, and cheese | 准备好享用纽约最棒的 |
[00:52] | in New York City. | 培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治 |
[00:55] | What? | 什么 |
[00:58] | Oh, no! | 不 |
[01:07] | I can’t believe that the bodega | 不敢相信有着 |
[01:09] | with the best bacon, egg, and cheese is literally gone. | 最好吃的培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治的杂货店没了 |
[01:12] | Okay, it’s okay. | 没事 没事 |
[01:13] | We’re gonna get one right now and forget that ever happened | 我们现在就去买 然后在吃痛苦的培根鸡蛋奶酪 |
[01:16] | when we’re taking painful bacon, egg, and cheese shits later, okay? | 三明治的时候 当刚才的事没发生过 好吗 |
[01:19] | – Oh, I can’t wait. – Come on. | -我等不及了 -来吧 |
[01:21] | You’re listening to Hot 97. | 你现在收听的是Hot97电台 |
[01:23] | – Ugh, the sign. – Let’s lay on the charm. | -看那标语 -我们用美人计 |
[01:30] | My goodness. | 天呐 |
[01:32] | So much on the menu that looks delicious. | 菜单上有好多美味的东西 |
[01:35] | – Yeah. – What do we get? | -是啊 -我们吃什么呢 |
[01:37] | I know it’s “wate,” | 我知道现在是”睡觉时间” |
[01:39] | but I really would like some “bweakfast” food. | 但我真的很想吃”爪餐” |
[01:42] | Hey, hunky boy. | 帅哥 |
[01:44] | Hi. Hi. | 嗨 嗨 |
[01:47] | Can we get two bacon, egg, and cheeses? | 我们能要两份培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治吗 |
[01:52] | Nope. No eggs after 11:00. | 不行 11点后不供应鸡蛋 |
[01:55] | You know what? | 知道吗 |
[01:56] | – This is this angel’s final breakfast in New York City. – Yeah. | -这是这位天使在纽约的最后一顿早餐 -嗯 |
[02:00] | Before she goes and rebuilds homes | 然后她就要去给海啸的 |
[02:01] | for Christian tsunami victims. | 基督教受害者重建家园 |
[02:03] | Okay, that’s not true. | 没有的事 |
[02:04] | And you are gonna deny her this? | 而你要将她拒之门外 |
[02:06] | You are gonna deny her this Make-A-Wish? | 不满足她的心愿 |
[02:09] | For shame. | 可耻 |
[02:11] | Shame! | 可耻 |
[02:13] | Shame! | 可耻 |
[02:24] | I’m just gonna leave some money. | 我留点钱 |
[02:26] | That was inappropriate. | 刚才太不得体了 |
[02:37] | I feel better. Let’s go. | 我感觉好多了 走吧 |
[02:39] | – This is gonna be delish. – We got this. | -会很可口的 -没问题 |
[02:42] | – We got this. – Jesus Christ. | -没问题 -老天 |
[02:46] | Oh, no, no. We’re not doing this. | 不 不 我们不在这儿吃 |
[02:51] | I can’t believe we couldn’t find you | 不敢相信我们没法 |
[02:53] | one last bacon, egg, and cheese before you go. | 在你走前让你最后吃到一次培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治 |
[02:56] | I failed you. | 我辜负了你 |
[02:57] | No, you didn’t, dude. | 不 你没有 |
[02:58] | And also, maybe I, like, can buy the ingredients. | 还有 或许我可以买原料 |
[03:01] | We could FaceTime while I make it in Boulder. | 我在波尔德一边做一边和你视频 |
[03:04] | Oh, God. | 天 |
[03:05] | It’s not the bacon, egg, and cheese. It’s just — | 不是培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治 只是 |
[03:08] | Oh, God! Why the fuck would you go to Boulder? | 天 为什么你要去波尔德 |
[03:11] | I mean, well, mainly for the residency program. | 主要是为了艺术家入驻项目 |
[03:14] | Yeah, yeah, residency, but — | 嗯嗯 入驻项目 可是 |
[03:15] | but what the fuck is the culture there? Rocks? | 那边有什么文化 石头吗 |
[03:17] | What could you possibly find at Boulder? | 你能在波尔德发现什么 |
[03:20] | What does Colorado have to offer that New York City doesn’t? | 什么东西科罗拉多有而纽约没有 |
[03:22] | Well, for one, recreational weed. | 首先 娱乐性大麻 |
[03:26] | Right. | 对哦 |
[03:27] | Yeah, but you’re gonna come so soon. | 是 但你很快就可以来 |
[03:29] | Oh, my God! | 我的天 |
[03:30] | I told you you can come whenever you want. | 我跟你说了你可以随时过来 |
[03:32] | No, look. | 不 你看 |
[03:35] | It is. It is! | 真的是 真的是 |
[03:38] | New York City, you’ve done it again! | 纽约啊 你又给我惊喜 |
[03:40] | Abbi, this is a Wa-Unchi toilet. | 艾比 这是Wa-Unchi马桶 |
[03:43] | Don’t you see? | 你看不到吗 |
[03:44] | We thought we were on some classic | 我们以为今天会像往常一样 |
[03:46] | Abbi and Ilana New York City journey today. | 就是艾比和阿拉娜在纽约街头闲逛 |
[03:48] | – We thought it was for the bacon, egg, and cheese. – Yeah. | -我们以为是为了培根鸡蛋奶酪三明治 -嗯 |
[03:49] | When, in fact, this was our mission all along. | 而实际上 这才是我们今天的任务 |
[03:54] | Okay. | 好吧 |
[03:56] | Okay, but — so — so, what is exactly the new mission now? | 嗯 所以我们的新任务是什么 |
[04:00] | This toilet. We’re gonna bring it back to my house. | 这个马桶 我们要把它带回我家 |
[04:03] | Are you…sure? | 你 确定吗 |
[04:06] | Abbi, this is a Wa-Unchi. | 艾比 这是Wa-Unchi |
[04:08] | It’s an intelligent toilet with an UV light | 这是一款智能马桶 它的紫外线 |
[04:10] | that breaks down the germs of fecal matter in the bowl. | 可以杀死马桶里粪便的细菌 |
[04:13] | It has a heated seat and warm water that sprays in your ass | 有加热座圈 你大便完后 |
[04:16] | after you take a dump just like a bidet. | 有温水喷洒你的屁股 就像净身盆一样 |
[04:18] | God, every time you are sprayed, you are reborn. | 天 每一次被喷 就等于是重生 |
[04:21] | Okay, Ilana, this is someone else’s. | 阿拉娜 这是别人的 |
[04:22] | This is gross. Just don’t touch it so much. | 好恶心 别一直摸 |
[04:24] | Abbi, this was our tiny little mission for the day. | 艾比 这是我们今天的小任务 |
[04:28] | Come on. It’s a $10,000 toilet. | 拜托 价值一万的马桶 |
[04:31] | I need this. | 我需要它 |
[04:35] | Yeah, okay, yeah. | 好吧 |
[04:36] | Let’s — you know what? Let’s take the toilet home! | 我们 我们把马桶带回家 |
[04:39] | You won’t regret it, mister! | 你不会后悔的 先生 |
[04:41] | – I’ll get a cab. – Okay. | -我去拦出租车 -好 |
[04:43] | Yeah, hey, yes. | 这里 对 |
[04:46] | Okay. Tilt. | 好的 倾斜 |
[04:47] | I’ll do this. | 我这样 |
[04:48] | Legs. Legs. | 腿 腿 |
[04:49] | Step. | 迈步 |
[04:53] | You dick! | 垃圾 |
[04:54] | – Toilet discrimination. – Okay, um… | -歧视马桶 -好吧 |
[04:59] | Okay. | 好的 |
[05:01] | Jesus. Uber is surging 60 times the normal rate. | 天 优步现在比正常价溢价了60倍 |
[05:04] | Okay, I’ll — I’ll just call us a Lyft. | 好 那我叫个来福车 |
[05:06] | Woof, my rating is very low. | 我的评分很低 |
[05:08] | Probably from the pee incident. | 多半是因为那次撒尿事故 |
[05:11] | Again, sorry about that. | 再次抱歉 |
[05:12] | – Totally fine. – All right. | -没事 -嗯 |
[05:14] | How are we gonna get this toilet back to Brooklyn? | 我们要怎么把这马桶带回布鲁克林 |
[05:30] | We’re gonna walk it across the bridge? | 我们带着它走过桥 |
[05:32] | That’s right. | 没错 |
[05:36] | Kids are suckers, man. | 小孩太傻了 |
[05:38] | 70 bucks for an old skateboard? | 70块买一个二手滑板 |
[05:40] | Too easy. | 太容易了 |
[05:42] | I can’t believe we’ve never | 不敢相信我们从没 |
[05:43] | walked across the Brooklyn Bridge together. | 一起走过布鲁克林大桥 |
[05:45] | Yeah, it’s kind of nuts that we managed to do it individually. | 是啊 我们竟然都单独走过 |
[05:48] | I mean, we’re almost always together. | 我们可是几乎形影不离 |
[05:52] | Ilana, I’m really proud of you, dude. | 阿拉娜 我很为你骄傲 |
[05:54] | I mean, obviously, for going back to school | 为你回到学校感到骄傲 |
[05:56] | to become the most badass therapist new York City has ever seen, | 成为纽约史上最厉害的心理医生 |
[06:00] | but also for the Phone Wigs! I mean, | 也为你的手机假发感到骄傲 |
[06:02] | I really feel like you have something there. | 我真觉得有戏 |
[06:04] | Like, that has legs, you know? | 潜能巨大 |
[06:07] | We have so many dope ideas. | 我们有很多很酷的点子 |
[06:09] | We have to make sure we keep up the brainstorming sessions going. | 我们得把我们的头脑风暴继续下去 |
[06:12] | It’s really important. | 很重要 |
[06:13] | I mean, I strongly, strongly believe in | 我对那个 |
[06:17] | the joint gynecologist/waxing/laser hair removal thing. | 妇科医生/蜜腊脱毛/激光脱毛三合一的点子很有信心 |
[06:21] | – Oh, yeah. – It’s like a one-stop shop. | -嗯 -就像是一站式服务机构 |
[06:23] | Come on, that’s genius. | 拜托 这简直是天才 |
[06:25] | I mean, I still also believe in the Dorito dust. | 我仍然对多力多滋粉末充满信心 |
[06:28] | I mean, I’m just eating the chip for the dust. | 我吃玉米片就是为了吃那粉末 |
[06:30] | Exactly. | 没错 |
[06:30] | And it’s just, like, cut out the middleman | 就好比是去掉中间商 |
[06:32] | and get me a vial straight of that dust | 直接给我一瓶那粉末 |
[06:34] | for spicing or for swigging. | 用来做调料或者大口吞咽 |
[06:36] | I just found out, dude, that Doritos are tortilla chips. | 我才知道多力多滋是玉米片 |
[06:41] | Wild. | 无法无天 |
[06:41] | – I mean, no one talks about that. – No. | -从来没人说过 -是啊 |
[06:46] | Abbi, I’ve been thinking a lot about | 艾比 我最近一直在想 |
[06:48] | this whole end-of-the-world thing. | 世界末日的事 |
[06:50] | If the apocalypse happens, we’re not gonna be in the same city. | 如果末日真的到来 我们会身处不同的城市 |
[06:53] | Shit. If we’re not in the same city, | 该死 如果我们不在同一座城市 |
[06:55] | how are we supposed to find each other? | 我们要怎么找到彼此 |
[06:58] | Once the electricity goes down, | 一旦停电 |
[07:00] | all the banks are gonna be hacked and drained. | 所有银行就会被黑 洗劫一空 |
[07:02] | That’s exactly what is going to happen. | 这是必然会发生的 |
[07:05] | You know what? First thing you do when you get to Boulder, | 知道吗 你到波尔德后要做的第一件事 |
[07:07] | you go to the bank. You take out a shit ton of cash. | 就是去银行 取一大笔钱 |
[07:10] | I’m talking half your savings, okay? | 我是说一半的积蓄 |
[07:11] | You go back to your dorm. You find a loose floorboard. | 你回到你的宿舍 找一块松动的地板 |
[07:14] | You pry it open, and you stuff the cash in there. | 撬开 把现金装进去 |
[07:16] | You create a hidden nook. Shit’s gonna be nuts. | 弄一个隐藏角落 到时会很疯狂的 |
[07:19] | Ooh, I love hidden nooks. I’m on it. | 我喜欢隐藏角落 我记住了 |
[07:21] | I read this article — well, headline — | 我看了一篇文章 其实是标题 |
[07:24] | that said that only four days after it all goes dark, | 说仅仅在变黑四天后 |
[07:27] | New Yorkers are gonna start killing each other. | 纽约人就会开始自相残杀 |
[07:29] | We got to get out of the cities and have cash on hand. | 我们得逃离城市 手上要有现金 |
[07:32] | Yeah. We’re also gonna need those straws | 嗯 我们还需要那种 |
[07:33] | that allow you to drink your own pee. | 可以喝自己尿的吸管 |
[07:35] | We’re gonna need to get that gel | 我们要买那种 |
[07:36] | that marathoners use for, like, energy and shit. | 马拉松运动员用来补充能量的胶 |
[07:39] | Oh, we’re also gonna need to get those pants | 还需要那种一拉 |
[07:40] | that zip and become shorts so you have both. | 就变短裤的裤子 这样就长短兼备 |
[07:43] | You’re gonna have to stock up on your contact lenses. | 你得囤隐形眼镜 |
[07:44] | But I really, really think | 但我真的 真的觉得 |
[07:46] | you should consider doing Lasik, for real. | 你应该考虑去做准分子激光原地角膜消除术 不开玩笑 |
[07:48] | Good call. Good call. | 好主意 好主意 |
[07:49] | Okay, where should we plan to meet up? | 好 我们该在哪碰面 |
[07:51] | All right. Why don’t I pull up the map? | 我把地图拿出来 |
[07:53] | Hold on. | 等等 |
[07:55] | All right, well, it looks like St. Louis is right in the middle. | 看样子圣路易斯就在正中 |
[07:58] | I mean, we could meet right in the middle of the arch. | 我们可以在弧线的正中碰面 |
[08:00] | This is so funny. | 好好笑 |
[08:01] | Colorado is where I thought Montana was. | 我一直以为科罗拉多州那里是蒙大拿州 |
[08:04] | You’re gonna be actually where I thought Oklahoma was. | 你要去的地方我以为那是俄克拉荷马州 |
[08:06] | That’s cool. Mormons are dope. | 酷 摩门教酷毙了 |
[08:08] | Well, I think Utah is actually the Mormon area. | 犹他州才是摩门教的地盘 |
[08:11] | Oh, right, right, right. | 对对对 |
[08:13] | – Momo’s still dope, though. – Yeah. | -但是摩门教还是很酷 -嗯 |
[08:15] | Okay, Abbi, promise me when you get to Colorado, | 艾比 答应我 你到了科罗拉多后 |
[08:17] | you’re also gonna get a bike | 你要买辆自行车 |
[08:18] | ’cause that’s why everybody’s gonna be killing each other — | 因为人们会为了汽油 |
[08:20] | for the gas. | 而自相残杀 |
[08:21] | Bike’s are the O.G. best friends of people. | 自行车是人类最初的最好朋友 |
[08:23] | Whew, okay, I’ll get a bike. | 好的 我会买自行车 |
[08:25] | Hey, let’s stop over here for a second. | 我们在这停一下吧 |
[08:34] | Should we write something? | 我们要不要写点什么 |
[08:36] | Yeah. | 嗯 |
[08:49] | So, should we, uh — should we jump? | 我们 我们要跳吗 |
[08:53] | Yeah. | 嗯 |
[08:55] | No, seriously, should we jump? | 我是认真的 我们要跳吗 |
[08:59] | We can’t. We have our big dinner date tonight. | 不行 我们今晚还约了晚饭 |
[09:02] | You said the reservations were, like, really hard to get. | 你说很难预约的 |
[09:04] | – That’s true. – We got to go. | -是的 -我们必须去 |
[09:12] | Ilana, I’m — I’m really scared. | 阿拉娜 我 我很怕 |
[09:16] | I’m, like — | 我… |
[09:17] | I’m moving across the country | 我要搬到国家另一头 |
[09:19] | and, like, changing my whole life? | 彻底改变我的生活 |
[09:23] | I mean, I’m — I’m not gonna know anybody. | 我 我在那一个人都不认识 |
[09:25] | I’m really scared of the change, too, | 我也很怕这次改变 |
[09:28] | but we’re both gonna be better for it. | 但我们都会变得更好 |
[09:32] | You really think so? | 你真这么想吗 |
[09:34] | I know it. I know it. | 我确信 我确信 |
[09:39] | You know, Ilana, me and you — | 阿拉娜 我和你 |
[09:42] | we’re still gonna be us, no matter what. | 无论如何 我们还是我们 |
[09:45] | That’s never gonna change. | 这一点永远不会变 |
[09:47] | Even if we’re in different cities, that’s never gonna change. | 就算我们在不同的城市 这也永远不会变 |
[09:51] | I know. | 我知道 |
[09:53] | But it is gonna change. | 但是会变 |
[09:57] | But this is still gonna be the most beautiful, | 但这仍然会是我生活中最美 |
[10:04] | deep, real, | 最深刻 最真实 |
[10:08] | cool and hot, meaningful, | 最酷 最性感 最有意义 |
[10:11] | important relationship of my life. | 最重要的关系 |
[10:14] | Me, too. | 我也是 |
[10:15] | I’ve never felt so cool. | 我从没感觉这么酷过 |
[10:17] | I’ve never felt so cool. | 我从没感觉这么酷过 |
[10:20] | Really–not–not as cool as when I’m with you. | 真的 和你在一起的时候我才感觉最酷 |
[10:22] | Me, neither. | 我也是 |
[10:26] | Abbi? | 艾比 |
[10:28] | I don’t think I can go to this dinner tonight. | 我应该去不了今晚的晚餐了 |
[10:31] | I just — I can’t say goodbye again, you know? | 我 我没法再次说再见 你懂吗 |
[10:35] | This is — This is too perfect. | 这 这太完美了 |
[10:37] | Wait, Ilana, no. | 等等 阿拉娜 不 |
[10:38] | We were gonna splurge and get, like, the whole bottle of wine. | 我们说好要大肆挥霍 喝一整瓶红酒的 |
[10:41] | I know, but — | 我知道 可是 |
[10:43] | I can’t do it. I’m really sorry. | 我做不到 真的对不起 |
[10:46] | You know what? You take the Wa-Unchi. | 这样吧 Wa-Unchi马桶给你 |
[10:49] | You’ll be the envy of your whole dorm. | 全宿舍的人都会羡慕死你 |
[10:51] | It’s not a dorm. | 那不是宿舍 |
[10:53] | – Goodbye, my queen. – Wait. | -再见 我的女王 -等等 |
[10:59] | Meet you in St. Louis! | 圣路易斯见 |
[11:08] | 艾比&阿拉娜 永不分离 | |
[11:18] | What the fuck? | 什么鬼 |
[11:22] | Hey, Bevers! | 贝弗斯 |
[11:26] | I got us food! | 我给咱们买了吃的 |
[11:58] | Abbi, thank God you picked up. | 艾比 谢天谢地你接了 |
[12:00] | I fell asleep. | 我睡着了 |
[12:01] | I was sunbathing nude on the roof again. | 我又在屋顶裸体日光浴 |
[12:04] | You — you were? | 是吗 |
[12:06] | Yeah, anyway, the door locked behind me. | 嗯 总之 门被关上了 |
[12:08] | Can you come up and bring my kimono? | 你能把我的和服拿上来吗 |
[12:10] | I’m extremely sunburned. | 我晒伤严重 |
[12:12] | Everywhere. | 全身都伤了 |
[12:14] | All right, Bevers, uh, you know, cover yourself up. | 好了 贝弗斯 把你遮好 |
[12:17] | I don’t want to see your sunburned penis. | 我不想看到你晒伤的鸡鸡 |
[12:19] | Open your eyes. | 睁开眼睛 |
[12:21] | No. | 不要 |
[12:22] | It’s kosher, dude. Open ’em up. | 没事的 姐们 睁开吧 |
[12:24] | Surprise! | 惊喜吧 |
[12:27] | What?! | 什么 |
[12:28] | Wait. What, Ilana? | 等等 阿拉娜 |
[12:31] | Oh, my God. | 我的天 |
[12:33] | Come on. My girl got to have a proper, royal queen send-off. | 拜托 我的女人必须要有正式气派的践行会 |
[12:38] | And sorry about the bridge before. | 之前桥上的事不好意思 |
[12:40] | I was very much processing this all at once. | 我当时在消化这一切 |
[12:43] | But then also, I had to leave to set this up, so — | 同时我得来这边布置 所以 |
[12:45] | Well, this is the cutest thing I have ever seen, | 这是我见过的最可爱的事 |
[12:49] | but I have to change. | 但我得去换衣服 |
[12:51] | Yeah, of course. Of course. | 当然 当然 |
[12:52] | Guys, Abbi and I are gonna go downstairs! | 各位 我和艾比要下楼 |
[13:01] | Abbi and I are back, you guys! | 艾比和我回来了 |
[13:05] | My God. Trey! | 天啊 特雷 |
[13:07] | Batter up! Trey! | 该你上了 特雷 |
[13:10] | Geez. | 天 |
[13:11] | – Hi. – It’s so good to see you. | -嗨 -很高兴见到你 |
[13:12] | Yeah. I’m really happy to see you. | 嗯 我很开心见到你 |
[13:15] | Oh, I got you something. | 我给你买了东西 |
[13:19] | They’re free weights. | 是自由重量器材 |
[13:20] | What? Thank you so much. | 什么 太谢谢了 |
[13:21] | I’ll — I’ll try to put it on my carry-on. | 我会尽力把它们装进我的手提行李 |
[13:24] | – Cool, yeah. – All right. | -好 -好 |
[13:25] | – Ooh, you all right? – Yeah, yeah, yeah, I got — | -你没事吧 -没事 我 |
[13:27] | Okay. I’ve always said, Abbi and incremental free weights, | 好 我总说 艾比和增量自由重量器材 |
[13:30] | – match made in heaven. – Yeah. | -是天作之合 -嗯 |
[13:32] | You’re really special to me, Abbi. | 你对我来说很特别 艾比 |
[13:34] | You’re really special to me, too. | 你对我来说也很特别 |
[13:37] | Well, then, I guess it’s now or never. | 那我想现在机不可失 |
[13:39] | Abbi Gary Anna Abrams, will you marry me? | 艾比·加里·安娜·艾布拉姆斯 你愿意嫁给我吗 |
[13:46] | Um…oh, Trey. | 特雷 |
[13:48] | Two carats. | 两克拉 |
[13:50] | No. Right? | 不行 对吗 |
[13:52] | Right, yeah, no. | 嗯 不行 |
[13:54] | Yeah, no. | 是的 不行 |
[13:56] | You know what? | 知道吗 |
[13:57] | – You know what? It was a big swing. – No, no, no. | -本来机会就不大 -不不 |
[13:58] | I just figured, this is my last chance, you know, so — | 我只是想着这是我最后一次机会 所以 |
[14:02] | It’s cool. | 没事 |
[14:03] | Maria — Cut the video, okay? Delete it. | 玛利亚 别拍了 删掉 |
[14:05] | She said no. | 她拒绝了 |
[14:07] | Okay, well, I should probably go | 好吧 我也许该走了 |
[14:09] | ’cause you said no to my proposal, | 因为你拒绝了我的求婚 |
[14:10] | but promise me you’ll eat for your blood type, okay? | 不过答应我你要针对你的血型饮食 好吗 |
[14:14] | – Okay. – Yeah. | -好了 -嗯 |
[14:15] | Done. Here you go. | 完了 给 |
[14:17] | – Thank you, all right. – Oh, you want that? | -谢谢 -你想要吗 |
[14:18] | Thank you so much. All right, beefcake. | 非常感谢 好了 猛男 |
[14:19] | You’ve had enough time to show off your rock-hard tits | 你已经秀够了你梆硬的奶头 |
[14:21] | and your Adonis ass. | 还有你的美臀 |
[14:22] | It’s time to leave and exit, dawg. | 是时候离开了 亲 |
[14:24] | Okay, I was just saying goodbye. | 好 我刚在道别呢 |
[14:25] | And I took off work for this. | 我请假过来的 |
[14:27] | You did? That sucks. You know what else sucks? | 是吗 那太糟了 知道还有什么糟吗 |
[14:29] | When your best friend moves away, | 当你最好的朋友搬走 |
[14:30] | and everybody’s out for face time for her. | 人人都争着和她视频 |
[14:32] | Get out of here! | 快走 |
[14:33] | But maybe we’ll be friends. I don’t have any left. | 但我们也许会做朋友 我已经没朋友了 |
[14:46] | I’m sorry. | 抱歉 |
[14:48] | I’m gonna miss you. | 我会想你的 |
[14:49] | I’m gonna miss you, too, Linc. | 我也会想你的 林肯 |
[14:51] | How’s Ilana doing? I haven’t talked to her yet. | 阿拉娜怎么样 我还没和她说话 |
[14:52] | Um, yeah. Ilana is, uh — | 嗯 阿拉娜 |
[14:59] | You know what? Ilana’s gonna be great. | 阿拉娜会很好的 |
[15:00] | Yeah, I’ma check it. | 嗯 我去看看 |
[15:01] | Okay. All right. | 好的 |
[15:02] | – See you later. – I’ll catch you. | -回见 -待会儿来找你 |
[15:04] | Enough. Get out of here. | 够了 快走 |
[15:05] | Go, go! | 快点 |
[15:07] | Are you Abbi’s friend? | 你是艾比的朋友吗 |
[15:11] | Hi. | 嗨 |
[15:12] | Thank you for inviting me. | 谢谢邀请我 |
[15:13] | Yeah, you’re welcome. | 不客气 |
[15:15] | – You’re Abbi’s friend, too, you know? – Yeah. | -你也是艾比的朋友 -嗯 |
[15:18] | We’re no longer dating, right? | 我们没在交往了 对吗 |
[15:20] | And, uh, we’re gonna keep growing | 我们会继续培养 |
[15:22] | our real, yet platonic friendship. | 我们真实却不切实际的友谊 |
[15:25] | And that means honesty. | 这就意味着坦诚 |
[15:28] | So, um, I’m gonna be honest with you. | 所以我就跟你直说了 |
[15:33] | You got to get the fuck out of here. | 你得离开这儿 |
[15:34] | – What? – Yeah, it’s time to go. | -什么 -你该走了 |
[15:36] | – Yeah. – I heard about grad school. | -嗯 -我听说了你要读研究生 |
[15:38] | Jaimé told me. I wanted to congratulate you. | 海眉跟我说了 我想祝贺你 |
[15:40] | Yeah, you’re a good guy. We all know it. | 嗯 你是个好人 我们都知道 |
[15:41] | – You’re gonna be a great thera– – Go, go! | -你会成为一个出色的心理… -快走 |
[15:44] | Party’s over, bitch. | 派对结束了 贱人 |
[15:45] | You know, I know it’s scary, you know, moving away. | 我知道搬去另一个地方很可怕 |
[15:48] | But it’s good to remind ourselves | 但时不时提醒我们自己 |
[15:49] | that there’s other places besides New York City. | 除了纽约还有别的地方挺好的 |
[15:51] | Beautiful places. | 漂亮的地方 |
[15:53] | And New Jersey. | 以及新泽西 |
[15:55] | It’s gonna be great. | 会很棒的 |
[15:56] | – Yeah. – ‘Sup? | -嗯 -好啊 |
[15:58] | – Okay! – Jesus! | -好 -天啊 |
[16:01] | So, Ilana, who are all these people? | 阿拉娜 这些人是谁 |
[16:03] | Um, they’re people from your building. | 他们是你那栋楼里的人 |
[16:05] | I just needed to fill the party out. | 我得让派对显得热闹点 |
[16:08] | Can’t wait for brunch next weekend. | 等不及下周末的早午餐了 |
[16:09] | Jersey City is pretty damn lit. | 泽西市很酷 |
[16:11] | Mm-hmm. Yes, it is. | 嗯 确实 |
[16:13] | Go now, though. | 走吧 |
[16:15] | – What? – Like, to — | -什么 -你是说… |
[16:17] | To leave. To exit and leave. | 离开 离开这里 |
[16:18] | – Good to see ya, Jersey Boy. Love ya! – I’m sorry. | -很高兴见到你 泽西男 爱你 -抱歉 |
[16:24] | Hi, guys. Thank you so much for coming. | 你们好 谢谢你们过来 |
[16:26] | You can leave. Come on, go. | 你们可以走了 快走 |
[16:28] | Okay. So the exit is that way. | 好了 出口在这边 |
[16:31] | Get out of here! | 快走 |
[16:32] | Bye! | 再见 |
[16:41] | Okay, I’m almost here. I’m almost here. | 我快到了 我快到了 |
[16:43] | Now we can connect. Right. | 现在我们可以联络感情了 |
[16:48] | Well, I’m gonna stay at my own place tonight. | 我今晚会住在自己家 |
[16:53] | Gonna give you two broads some privacy. | 我会给你们一点隐私 |
[16:55] | And I have a present for you. | 我还给你准备了礼物 |
[16:57] | You didn’t have to get me anything. | 你不用给我买东西的 |
[16:59] | Oh, well, it’s just — | 只是个 |
[17:02] | So you can store your cheese in here. | 你可以在这里面放你的奶酪 |
[17:05] | Everyone will know whose cheese it is, | 人人都会知道是谁的 |
[17:08] | and they won’t be able to take it from you anymore. | 他们就不能再偷吃你的了 |
[17:12] | Thank you, Bevers. | 谢谢你 贝弗斯 |
[17:19] | I — I love it. It’s perfect. | 我很喜欢 很完美 |
[17:22] | And we’ll see each other again. | 我们还会再见面的 |
[17:25] | Yeah. | 嗯 |
[17:26] | All right. | 好了 |
[17:27] | Brunch at Felix tomorrow at 2:00. | 明天2点去菲利克斯吃早午餐 |
[17:29] | And then a movie. My choice. | 然后看电影 我来选 |
[17:30] | Clear your schedule, bitch. | 把日程排开 贱人 |
[17:41] | Thanks for the party. | 谢谢你办的派对 |
[17:43] | My pleasure. | 我的荣幸 |
[17:46] | Ready? | 准备好了吗 |
[17:48] | Disney. Go. | 迪士尼 开始 |
[17:49] | Euro-loving Aryan Nation pre-teen porn. | 热爱欧洲人亚利安国儿童色情 |
[17:51] | Walt Disney was, like, um, jizzing, basically, | 华特·迪士尼喜欢 |
[17:54] | for rich Euros and feudal lords, | 有钱欧洲人和封建领主 |
[17:57] | and Mickey Mouse was supposed to represent a dirty little Jew. | 米老鼠代表的其实是下流犹太人 |
[17:59] | Straight up. | 真的 |
[18:00] | He was, like, on the ship, you know what I mean? | 它在船上 懂我意思吗 |
[18:02] | Like — He was, like, a plotting and scheming dirty little Jew, | 它就是个诡计多端的下流犹太人 |
[18:05] | which I love to plot and scheme, so I’m, like, you got me, Walt. | 我喜欢阴谋诡计 所以我想 被你识破了 华特 |
[18:11] | Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. | 好好 好好 |
[18:13] | Who do I want? Who do I want? | 我想听谁 我想听谁 |
[18:15] | I– I know. | 我知道了 |
[18:16] | Ready? From inside the mouth. | 准备 从嘴巴里面开始 |
[18:19] | Ohh, the Kennedys. | 肯尼迪家族 |
[18:22] | Ooh, thank you. The Kennedys. Obviously, first of all, sex addicts. | 谢谢 肯尼迪家族 首先他们有性瘾 |
[18:25] | Second of all, they killed Marilyn Monroe. | 其次 他们杀了玛丽莲·梦露 |
[18:27] | Wait, hold on. | 等等 |
[18:28] | I thought Marilyn Monroe died of a drug overdose. | 玛丽莲·梦露不是嗑药过量死的吗 |
[18:32] | The government killed her because she knew too much. | 政府杀了她因为她知道得太多了 |
[18:34] | Like, she just knew stuff about — | 她知道… |
[18:36] | Yeah, she knew about their bodies. She knew about their policies. | 她知道他们的身体 知道他们的政策 |
[18:40] | Like, where did you hear that? | 你从哪儿听说来的 |
[18:41] | I will double check, but, um — | 我核实下 不过 |
[18:45] | It’s widely known. | 这是人尽皆知的事 |
[18:46] | It’s widely known. | 人尽皆知 |
[18:48] | All right. | 好吧 |
[18:49] | Well, these are gonna come in handy for when I’m lonely. | 我寂寞的时候就可以看这些打发时间了 |
[18:53] | Okay, another one. | 再来一个 |
[18:57] | What’s up? | 好啊 |
[18:58] | The post office. | 邮局 |
[19:00] | Okay, so the way that the post office controls women is… | 邮局控制女性的方式是… |
[20:03] | Abbi? Abbi, Abbi, are you insane? | 艾比 艾比 艾比 你疯了吗 |
[20:07] | You — you weren’t gonna wake me up? | 你不打算叫醒我吗 |
[20:08] | Are you psychotic? You were gonna leave without saying goodbye? | 你精神错乱了吗 你不跟我道别就走吗 |
[20:11] | I’m sorry, dude. | 对不起 |
[20:13] | We said goodbye a million times. | 我们道别过无数次 |
[20:14] | I-I didn’t know how to do this one. | 我不知道这次该怎么道别 |
[20:15] | Yeah, but I got you something. | 但我给你准备了一样东西 |
[20:17] | It’s a go bag. | 一个应急包 |
[20:20] | The apocalypse will happen, | 末日会到来 |
[20:22] | and I will meet you in St. Louis. | 我会来圣路易斯见你 |
[20:24] | Right, okay. | 好的 |
[20:37] | I’m so proud of you. | 我很为你骄傲 |
[20:39] | I’m so proud of you, too, dude. | 我也为你骄傲 |
[20:40] | Really, you are, like — | 真的 你是 |
[20:42] | You’re the smartest person I know. | 你是我认识的最聪明的人 |
[20:44] | Really? | 真的吗 |
[20:46] | Yeah, are you kidding me? | 是啊 你开玩笑吗 |
[20:47] | I’m, like, the only person you know. | 我是你唯一认识的人 |
[20:51] | For real, though, Ilana. You, like — | 不过讲真 阿拉娜 你 |
[20:52] | You’re gonna kill it. I’m so excited. | 你会秒杀全场的 我好激动 |
[20:55] | For everything for you. | 为一切也为你 |
[20:57] | You’ve got so much. | 你体内 |
[21:00] | So much inside of you. | 蕴藏了巨大能量 |
[21:04] | You have so much to give. | 你有好多本事 |
[21:07] | So much all wrapped up. | 都包裹好了 |
[21:10] | And you’re just letting it unroll. | 等着你展开 |
[21:13] | I mean, I don’t even feel like I was, like, alive before I met you. | 我在遇见你之前甚至不觉得自己是活人 |
[21:16] | You, like, taught me — | 你教我 |
[21:18] | Taught me how to do it, dude. | 教我怎么有活力 |
[21:21] | Well, you’re alive as hell now. | 你现在活力四射 |
[21:23] | This is really brave, and it’s the right thing. | 你很勇敢 这也是正确的选择 |
[21:26] | I wouldn’t have been able to do it without you. | 没有你我肯定做不到 |
[21:31] | Come on, you dumb broads! | 快点 你们两个臭婆娘 |
[21:32] | I’m saying goodbye to my best friend, you fucking fuck. | 我在跟我最好的朋友道别 傻逼 |
[21:35] | This is a once-in-a-lifetime, emotional moment | 这是一生只有一次和我灵魂姐妹的 |
[21:36] | with my soul sister, you rank rat whore! | 真情流露时刻 你个狗屎玩意儿 |
[21:37] | See if I tip you! | 看我给不给你小费 |
[21:40] | You’re just so beautiful from the inside out. | 你的美丽由内而外 |
[21:42] | No, dude, you are, really. | 不 你才是 真的 |
[21:45] | Okay. Go. | 好了 走吧 |
[21:46] | – Go, go, go, go, go. – Okay. | -走吧 -好 |
[21:48] | You got this. You got this. | 你可以的 你可以的 |
[21:53] | Okay. | 好了 |
[21:55] | Okay. Bye. | 好 拜拜 |
[22:08] | Okay. | 好的 |
[22:09] | I love you. | 我爱你 |
[22:29] | Fuck! | 靠 |
[22:42] | Oh, my God. | 我的天 |
[22:45] | Yes! | 棒 |
[22:47] | Freaking jackpot. | 中大奖了 |
[23:03] | Eww, dude! | 恶心 |
[23:04] | Insane. | 不可思议 |
[23:05] | Walking it? Disgusting. | 遛那只狗 太恶心了 |
[23:07] | Well, thank you for keeping me up to date | 谢谢你给我汇报 |
[23:09] | – on all of New York’s most current events. – Yeah. | -纽约的最新时事 -嗯 |
[23:13] | How have you been? | 你最近怎么样 |
[23:14] | Well, since last night, I went to sleep, | 昨晚后 我上床睡觉 |
[23:17] | and then I woke up, | 然后醒来 |
[23:18] | and then I went to the coffee shop. | 然后去咖啡店 |
[23:19] | – My coffee shop. – Cute, cute. | -我的咖啡店 -可爱 |
[23:22] | I also went to sleep and woke up, | 我也去睡觉然后醒来 |
[23:24] | so we are on the same schedule. | 所以我们日程是一样的 |
[23:26] | Ew, you know what happened to me today? | 你知道我今天遇到了什么吗 |
[23:27] | I bumped into this girl, and I was, like, “Sorry.” | 我碰到了一个女生 我说”抱歉” |
[23:29] | And she was, like, “You’re fine.” | 她说”你没事” |
[23:31] | Ew. “You’re fine”? | 靠 “你没事” |
[23:33] | – Fuck her. – Right? | -去她妈的 -是吧 |
[23:34] | I’m, like, I know I’m fine, at least. | 我知道我没事 至少没事 |
[23:36] | Just say, “It’s okay.” | 就说”没关系”不就行了 |
[23:37] | I mean, that’s not even part of my vocabulary. | 这根本不在我的词汇范围内 |
[23:39] | You have to be, like, trained for that to be a response. | 你必须经过训练才能这样回答 |
[23:42] | That’s right. Don’t tell me my value ’cause you know what? | 没错 别告诉我的价值 因为你知道吗 |
[23:44] | I’m actually foiiine. | 我棒呆了 |
[23:46] | – Oh, you foiiine, baby. – You, too. | -你确实棒呆 -你也是 |
[23:48] | All right, listen. I got to go. | 好了 我得挂了 |
[23:49] | Uh, I’ll call you when I leave the studio, okay? | 我离开工作室后再给你打电话 好吗 |
[23:51] | Ooh, the studio? Okay. | 工作室啊 好的 |
[23:53] | Love you, baby. | 爱你 亲爱的 |
[23:53] | All right. Love you, too. | 好 我也爱你 |
[24:14] | Dude, I am so excited to fucking deejay this bat mitzvah tonight. | 我好激动今晚要在这个犹太女孩成人仪式上做DJ |
[24:17] | Rich children, like, legit know how to party. | 有钱人小孩 真的懂怎么派对 |
[24:20] | But honestly, like, what is deejaying? | 不过什么是DJ |
[24:23] | I think it’s just a playlist, right? | 就是个歌单 对吗 |
[24:24] | Yeah, but, like, with a table. | 嗯 不过还有个桌子 |
[24:25] | You dropped these. | 你东西掉了 |
[24:26] | Oh, my God. Thanks. | 天 谢谢 |
[24:30] | Okay, so who were those guys | 和我们昨晚在屋顶上 |
[24:31] | we ended up playing pool with on the roof last night? | 打台球的那几个人是谁啊 |
[24:33] | I don’t know. I think one of them played for the Knicks. | 我不知道 有一个貌似是纽约尼克斯队的 |
[24:43] | Did you just make change with a homeless guy? | 你刚才是和流浪汉换零钱吗 |
[24:45] | First of all, it’s a man without a home. | 第一 那是个没有家的男人 |
[24:47] | Second, we gonna act like he ain’t got no small bills? | 第二 我们难道要假装他没零钱吗 |
[25:09] | The information inside your brain is just vast. | 你脑子里的信息浩瀚无穷 |
[25:13] | Vast and then also, there’s nothing. | 浩瀚无穷但也空空如也 |
[25:15] | Yeah, but good nothing. | 嗯 但是是好的空空如也 |
[25:16] | You’re, like, just smart, you know what I mean? | 你很聪明 懂我意思吗 |
[25:19] | – Am I, though? – Yes, you’re so smart. | -是吗 -是的 你特别聪明 |
[25:21] | – Thank you. – I wouldn’t say at, like, | -谢谢 -虽然不擅长 |
[25:22] | you know, reading and writing, but — | 看书写字 但是 |