| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:02] | – Gandalf. – Aragorn! | – 甘道夫 – 阿拉贡 |
| [00:04] | Gandalf! | 甘道夫 |
| [00:05] | Denzel, there’s no way Gandalf’s dick was bigger than Aragorn’s. | Denzel 甘道夫的屌绝对没有阿拉贡的大 |
| [00:09] | What? Not only was it bigger, he could shoot fireballs off that shit. | 什么? 不光比他大 人家的屌还能发射火球 |
| [00:14] | Look out! That guy’s burning down a village with his dick! | 当心 那家伙用他的屌烧毁了一个村子 |
| [00:16] | I know for a fact that Viggo Mortensen’s hung like an Elven horse. | 反正我知道Viggo Mortensen的巨屌和精灵马一样大 |
| [00:19] | – What, you seen it? – Not in person. It was in a dream. | – 怎么着 你见过? – 不是当面见的 在梦里 |
| [00:23] | Ooh, can you believe it’s only three days until J.R.R. Tol-Con? | 你能相信还有三天就是J.R.R.托尔金展了么? |
| [00:26] | I can’t wait to go with you, Denzel! | 等不及和你一起去啦 Denzel |
| [00:31] | ♪ Lord Of The Rings is our favorite thing. ♪ | ♪ 我们最爱指环王 ♪ |
| [00:33] | ♪ Lords and Orcs and magical Kings. ♪ | ♪ 领主 兽人 还有神国王 ♪ |
| [00:35] | ♪ Look at that human and Elf have a fling. ♪ | ♪ 看那人类和精灵一夜情 ♪ |
| [00:37] | ♪ Gollum is trying to steal Frodo’s bling. ♪ | ♪ 咕噜想要偷走弗罗多的指环 ♪ |
| [00:39] | Shut up, shut up, shut up! | 停 停 停 |
| [00:42] | Uh, what the hell are y’all talking about? | 你们说特么什么呢? |
| [00:44] | Lord Of The Rings convention. You know, wizards and dragons and stuff. | 魔戒展 你知道的 巫师啦 恶龙啦之类的 |
| [00:48] | Before y’all arrested me | 在你们逮捕我之前 |
| [00:49] | I was on my way to a convention filled with wizards and dragons. | 我也要去一个展览会来着 那里都是巫师和恶龙 |
| [00:53] | – For real? Y’all dress up and stuff? – Oh, hell yeah, we do. | – 真的? 你们都化妆什么的么? – 绝逼要化啊 |
| [00:58] | Still better than comic-con. | 多少比动漫展好吧 |
| [01:14] | What’s the matter, Connie? | 你怎么了 Connie? |
| [01:16] | Malloy replaced my toiled seat with a bear trap. | Malloy把我的马桶圈换成捕熊夹了 |
| [01:19] | What? | 什么? |
| [01:21] | What a prankster. | 好个调皮鬼 |
| [01:23] | Malloy’s always been kind of an asshole but | Malloy一直就这么浑 但… |
| [01:25] | is it just me, or is he, like, way worse recently? | 我看错了 还是他最近真越来越完蛋了? |
| [01:27] | Well, if he is, I haven’t noticed. | 如果是他 我可没觉得 |
| [01:32] | Ah, good, another Doonesbury I don’t get. | 好嘛 我又落下一集Doonesbury |
| [01:34] | Why is Malloy acting out all of a sudden? | Malloy怎么突然间变这么坏了? |
| [01:37] | Because he’s a wild animal, and Woody never disciplines him. | 因为他是野生动物 Woody也从来不好好管教他 |
| [01:40] | He just gives him sugar and weapons. | 净给他糖果和武器了 |
| [01:42] | For your information, Dr. Phil, I’m a harsh disciplinarian. | 我就正式告诉你 Phil博士 我是个严厉的实施纪律者 |
| [01:46] | Why, last night, Malloy said a dirty word | 要知道 昨晚Malloy骂完街 |
| [01:48] | and I washed his mouth out with a bar of chocolate. | 我还用巧克力棒好好给他刷了刷嘴呢 |
| [01:50] | Stop it, please. | 停下 快停下 |
| [01:53] | – Woody! – Fine. | – Woody – 好吧 |
| [01:54] | Malloy, stop trying to murder Steve, or else! | Malloy 不管你是想杀Steve还是怎么地 停下来 |
| [02:01] | This will teach you to ruin my fun. | 让你再敢毁了爷的乐子 |
| [02:04] | Okay, okay, I’m sorry. | 好吧 好吧 我错了 |
| [02:08] | “Well,” he said, “I’m back”. | “好了” 他说道”我回来了” |
| [02:11] | – The end. – God damn! | – 全书完 – 诶我擦 |
| [02:14] | Now that is how you close out an epic fantasy trilogy! | 这才配称得上是一本梦幻三部曲史诗的结局 |
| [02:16] | I can’t believe you never read these before you met me. | 真不敢相信你在遇到我之前从来没读过这些 |
| [02:19] | The only thing that gets read in Detroit is your rights. | 在底特律你唯一能读到的东西就是你的”权利” |
| [02:21] | Steve, I’m glad you opened my eyes to this fantastical world. | Steve 我很高兴你能带我见识到这么神奇的世界 |
| [02:24] | It helps me forget that I work in a boring-ass park | 让我忘了自己是在无聊透顶的公园里上班 |
| [02:26] | and that my best friend is a nerd with a micro-phallus. | 并且我最好的朋友是个JJ短小的呆子 |
| [02:28] | Best friend? Thanks, pal. | 最好的朋友? 谢谢 伙计 |
| [02:31] | Tol-Con’s gonna be awesome! | 托尔金展肯定会超棒 |
| [02:33] | Ooh, you have no idea. Here’s the best part. | 那必须的 这是最好的部分 |
| [02:36] | There’s a costume contest? | 还有COS比赛? |
| [02:38] | And the winner gets to meet v-v-v… | 获胜者会见到V-V-V… |
| [02:42] | Viggo Mortensen Viggo Mortensen! | |
| [02:44] | I’ve got the perfect costume! | 我有一套完美的COS服 |
| [02:46] | The mythical Shadowfax! | 神奇的影疾 |
| [02:52] | The Lord of all horses! | 马中之王 |
| [02:54] | Hey, wait, what the hell? | 等等 诶哟我去? |
| [02:57] | This ain’t right! | 你搞错了 |
| [02:58] | Stop! Help! | 停 救命啊 |
| [03:01] | From now on, you getting in the back. | 从现在开始 你在后面 |
| [03:04] | – What happened here? – Malloy did it. | – 什么情况? – Malloy干的 |
| [03:06] | Where is your little Prince Charming? | 你家那个可爱小王子呢? |
| [03:08] | Don’t ask me, I’m grounded. | 甭问我 我被关禁闭了 |
| [03:10] | I saw him go that way with a flamethrower. | 我看他拿着喷火器往那边去了 |
| [03:13] | Oh, I thought you were bobbing for french fries again. | 嗨 我还以为你又炸薯条了呢 |
| [03:16] | – Where did he get a flamethrower? – What? It was Christmas. | – 他哪来的喷火器? – 怎么? 圣诞节嘛 |
| [03:19] | Malloy is a troubled youth, Woody. I should know. I used to be one. | Malloy是个问题青年 Woody 我知道 因为以前我也是 |
| [03:23] | See, back when I was a kid in Detroit, I was in a gang. | 你看 小时候还在底特律时 我就是个混混 |
| [03:26] | We called ourselves the cool friends gang. | 我们称自己是酷友帮 |
| [03:30] | And when I say we were hard-core, I mean we were hard-core! | 我们说我们很硬气的时候 我们就是很硬气 |
| [03:34] | Get outta the sleigh, bitch! | 滚下雪橇 贱人 |
| [03:43] | Whoa, Denzel was in a gang! | Denzel以前还是个混混 |
| [03:45] | Let’s all take a moment to soak in that startling revelation. | 在这段黑历史面前咱们都喘口气先 |
| [03:48] | – This is serious, Woody. – Ah, you’re all overreacting. | – 这事不是闹着玩的 Woody – 是你反应得太过了 |
| [03:51] | Malloy hasn’t gotten into any real trouble yet. | Malloy还没惹出什么大麻烦呢 |
| [04:00] | 3 counts of grand theft auto, 137 moving violations | 3起飞车盗窃 137次交通违章 |
| [04:03] | 12 counts of attempted vehicular homicide, and he called my partner a [Bleep] dipshit. | 12次撞人未遂 还叫我搭档是个大傻X |
| [04:06] | First of all, I don’t know where he could have heard language like that. | 首先 我不知道他是从哪学来的那种话 |
| [04:10] | Second, your partner looks like a [Bleep] dipshit. | 其次 你的搭档看着就是个大傻X |
| [04:13] | If this bear steps foot in our town again, we’re throwing him in prison. | 如果这只熊再到镇上来 我们就把它扔号子里去 |
| [04:16] | Prison? Don’t worry, officers. I’ll make sure nothing like this ever happens again. | 坐牢? 别担心 警官 我保证不会再出现类似的事件了 |
| [04:23] | Oh, God. Maybe he is out of control. | 天呐 也许他真是失控了 |
| [04:26] | What am I gonna do? | 我该怎么办? |
| [04:27] | I think it’s time I made a call to my boys in Detroit to scare this bear straight. | 我想是时候打电话叫我那帮底特律哥们来”劝劝”这熊崽子弃暗投明了 |
| [04:31] | Right after I practice galloping as a mythical horse. | 等我练习完神马跑步就打去 |
| [04:34] | Aw, man! | 诶妈呀 |
| [04:39] | There come my boys. | 我哥们来了 |
| [04:40] | The baddest gangstas in Detroit. What? | 底特律最黑恶的势力 啥? |
| [04:46] | Good afternoon, Denzel. | 下午好 Denzel |
| [04:48] | These Urkels are gonna scare Malloy straight? | 这些土包子是要来吓唬Malloy的吗? |
| [04:51] | They’re wearing goddamn penny loafers! | 他们还穿着地摊上买的懒汉鞋 |
| [04:53] | Wow. You guys look different. | 你们变化可真大 |
| [04:55] | Y’all still gang banging, right, murder bone? | 你们还在一起混呢吧 杀人狂? |
| [04:57] | Oh, no. I teach Jewish-African-American studies at the Community College. | 没啦 我在社区大学给美籍非裔犹太人教书呢 |
| [05:02] | And I own a Kia dealership. | 我现在卖起亚汽车呢 |
| [05:04] | Bug eyes here does the marketing for me. | 歪眼仔帮我跑销售呢 |
| [05:06] | Iba beebe settum uppa theeba big wavy men and inflatababull gobarillas. | 那娘们的奶子嘛比那男人的胸鸡大还喷火呢 |
| [05:11] | Yeah, he never really recovered from that drive-by. | 是啊 他还没从那次飞车抢劫中缓过劲儿呢 |
| [05:17] | Oh, great. Now we have four Denzels? | 好吧 现在有四个Denzel了? |
| [05:25] | So this is the little punk bitch who thinks he’s a criminal. | 那么你就是那个自封犯罪天才的小阿飞了 |
| [05:29] | Yeah, well, you eye to eye with some real criminals, bitch! | 是啊 现在 你正和货真价实的罪犯对上眼了 小贱人 |
| [05:32] | I assumed, but it sounds racist when I say it. | 或许吧 但我这样说是在歧视你们 |
| [05:34] | Back in the day, we got in some serious shit. | 之前我们可做过不少牛X事呢 |
| [05:37] | Carjacking, pushing dope, breeding midgets and fighting them to the death. | 劫车 贩毒 喂养侏儒 然后把他们给揍死 |
| [05:42] | Okay, that last one caught me off guard. | 不错 最后一条我可没料到 |
| [05:44] | Shit was for real, Malloy. | 都是真人真事 Malloy |
| [05:45] | We had no rules and didn’t respect the law. | 我们无拘无束 不受法律约束 |
| [05:48] | We just ran around, doing whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted. | 我们肆意闯荡 为所欲为 肆意妄为 |
| [05:52] | That sounds awesome. Why’d you stop? | 听起来挺牛X 为啥不干了? |
| [05:54] | Yeah, why did we stop? | 是啊 为啥咱们不干了? |
| [05:57] | Because we turned our lives around, fool! | 因为咱们改过自新了 蠢货 |
| [05:59] | But you may not be so lucky. | 但你就没那么走运了 |
| [06:01] | So you guys used to be bad asses. | 那么你们曾经有两把刷子嘛 |
| [06:03] | Now you’re the target demo for HGTV. | 而现在园艺节目都能要你们参演了 |
| [06:06] | Where do I sign up? | 我要到哪给你们报名? |
| [06:07] | – We still know how to get down. – Yeah. | – 我们可是廉颇未老啊 – 是啊 |
| [06:09] | Just last week, I bought a bumper pool table! | 就在上周 我买了一张有缓冲杆的台球桌 |
| [06:12] | Last Friday my wife left for a conference in Tulsa and I got to masturbate! | 上周五我老婆去塔尔萨开会 我还在家狠狠撸了一管 |
| [06:16] | Iba collect recipes offba Pinterest. | 我在餐馆回收用掉的菜单 |
| [06:20] | Oh, he’s right. Our lives suck. | 他说的没错 咱的生活很操蛋 |
| [06:22] | Remember old officer Pulaski with the gimp leg? | 还记得瘸腿老警官Pulaski吗? |
| [06:25] | Used to chase us like this? | 那时他是这样追我们的吧? |
| [06:26] | “Hey, mother[Bleep]! Get over here!” | “嘿 狗杂种们 快滚回来” |
| [06:28] | “Get over here, little mother[Bleep]!” | “滚回来 小狗杂种们” |
| [06:32] | Then we shot him in the face. | 然后我们打爆了他的脸 |
| [06:35] | Feels good to laugh again. | 重开笑颜的感觉真好 |
| [06:36] | See? That’s the spirit. | 看到没? 你们就应该这样 |
| [06:38] | Guys, I don’t mean to play doctor, but you’ve all got a case of the “no funsies”. | 我不是给你们看病 大伙们 但你们都得了”生活蛋疼”综合症 |
| [06:41] | That’s what we get for sharing needles. | 这就是交叉注射毒品的代价 |
| [06:44] | Man, the bear’s right. I’m bored. | 天呐 这熊说的没错 我真很无聊 |
| [06:46] | Meba tooba. | 我一样耶 |
| [06:47] | I drive a goddamn minivan. | 我他喵的还开小车呢 |
| [06:51] | What do you say we hit the town and have some real fun? | 不如我们到镇子上闹点事 来点真刀真枪的? |
| [06:53] | – Yeah! – Hell, yeah! | – 很好 – 棒极了 |
| [06:54] | Hold on. | 等等 |
| [06:55] | You’re supposed to be scaring the bear straight, not declaring the bear’s great! | 你们是来把这只熊扳回正轨 不是和他一起出去闹鬼 |
| [06:58] | Don’t be a punk, D. We about to tear shit up old school. | 别扫我们的兴 D仔 是时候推翻传统了 |
| [07:01] | – You in or out? – Uh, in? | – 你跟不跟我们走? – 跟? |
| [07:03] | So, cubsy wubsy, did my homeboys scare you straight yet? | 嗨 小毛球 我的朋友们给你上完课了? |
| [07:06] | Suck it, cracker! | 吃我一拳 死鬼 |
| [07:08] | – Yeah! – Yeah, take it! | – 受死吧 – 尝尝这个 |
| [07:15] | Denzel, hey, there you are. I’ve been looking all over for you. | Denzel 可找到你了 我满世界都没看到你人影 |
| [07:18] | You didn’t show for Shadowfax practice. Everything okay? | 你没来和我一起排练 有什么事耽误了? |
| [07:21] | Whoa, hold up. Who the [Bleep] is this hookey donkey? | 等等 这头蠢驴是尼玛谁? |
| [07:24] | I get it! He’s a hookey donkey. | 我知道了 他就是头蠢驴 |
| [07:26] | We’re Shadowfax, the Lord of all horses. | 我们是影疾 万马之王 |
| [07:31] | – Tell ’em, Denzel. – Denzel, you’re friends with this guy? | – 告诉他们 Denzel – Denzel 这家伙是你朋友? |
| [07:33] | Oh, don’t pay attention to Steve, fellas. | 别被Steve转移注意力了 大伙们 |
| [07:35] | He’s just a local pedophile we keep around to clean out the shitters. | 他只不过是这里的恋童癖 我们雇他来清马桶的 |
| [07:37] | Now let’s go! Later, local pedophile Steve. | 快走吧 回见啦 本地恋童癖Steve |
| [07:50] | You guys have gotten pretty soft. You sure you still know how to commit crimes? | 你们看起来有些手生了 确定自己还记得怎么兴风作浪? |
| [07:53] | Of course we do. | 这不废话嘛 |
| [07:55] | I said, “I want a small business loan,” mother[Bleep]! | 我说 “给我贷点小款做生意” 狗杂种 |
| [07:58] | What do you mean this Zumba Groupon’s expired, mother[Bleep]? | 你敢说这张尊巴舞的优惠券过期了 狗东西? |
| [08:02] | I sabida, “putta my child in your pribata schoobada, moboda fuboda!” | 我丫和你说 “他咩把我儿丢你学校读勒个书 瓜娃子” |
| [08:08] | Someone please tell me what the hell he just said. | 拜托来个人帮我翻译下他的鸟语 |
| [08:11] | Yo, your kids are gonna love it here. They got an excellent drama department. | 你们肯定会爱上这地方的 这学校的戏剧学院相当不错 |
| [08:16] | Freeze, scumbags! | 举起手来 人渣们 |
| [08:19] | I don’t like this at all. Way too many blacks in here. | 这地方真让我恼火 黑鬼忒尼玛密集 |
| [08:27] | Turn to the right. Eyes forward. | 向右转 眼睛向前看 |
| [08:34] | Good afternoon, gentlemen. I’m Warden Smalls. | 下午好 先生们 我是典狱长小姬子 |
| [08:39] | Electric chair! | 电椅伺候 |
| [08:45] | Anyway, I run a fair and honorable Christian prison here. | 不管怎样 我都会本着基督教义 公平公正的履行典狱职责 |
| [08:49] | Rule number one… no sarcasm. | 第一条规定… 话里不准带刺 |
| [08:53] | Aw, that’s a great rule. | 矮油 这规定好赞喏 |
| [08:55] | Well, looks like we got us a rebel here. | 好嘛 看来这儿有人不识抬举 |
| [08:58] | Try this on for size. | 尝尝这个吧 |
| [09:01] | Why’d you hit me? | 为毛打我? |
| [09:02] | Because as the Bible says | 因为圣经里说 |
| [09:03] | it’s much more painful to watch your friend suffer for your sins. | 看着你的朋友为你的罪过受苦 会让你的痛苦更上一层楼 |
| [09:08] | Oh, yeah, it is. | 啊呀 是啊是啊 |
| [09:10] | That sounds like more sarcasm, boy. | 听起来更让我如鲠在喉啊 小伙子 |
| [09:13] | Oh, no, please, stop. | 不 别打了 拜托 停下 |
| [09:15] | I’ll break you of that sarcasm, son | 只要能让你的嘴巴放乖点 小伙子 |
| [09:17] | if I have to break every billy club over your friend’s head. | 我不在乎把所有的警棍都打断在你朋友的脑袋上 |
| [09:21] | Hey! Ah, stop! Oh! God damn! | 够了 打住 天呐 |
| [09:25] | Hey, Warden, that’s a really nice tie. Take that, Malloy! | 嘿 典狱长先生 您这款领结真心帅气哟 挨打吧 Malloy |
| [09:29] | Ow! Wait, wait, wait! | 等等等等等等 |
| [09:30] | I thought my friend had to suffer for my sins. | 我还以为我朋友会为我的罪恶受罚呢 |
| [09:32] | I was being sarcastic, idiot! | 我是在挖苦你呢 痴呆 |
| [09:34] | Welcome to Hazelhurst prison. | 欢迎来到Hazelhurst监狱 |
| [09:36] | I guarantee you boys gonna stay in line… | 我会保证你们在这里服服帖帖 |
| [09:39] | Or my name isn’t Warden Tiny Smalls. | 不然我就不叫典狱长超级小姬子 |
| [09:43] | Electric chair! | 电椅伺候 |
| [09:51] | Scare me straight, huh? Good plan, Woody. | 扳我回正轨是吧? 算你狠 Woody |
| [09:53] | When we get home, I’m gonna spank the shit out of you! | 等我回去 看我不把你屁股打得喷出翔来 |
| [09:56] | You’re not going home, Malloy. | 我不会让你回去的 Malloy |
| [09:57] | You’re staying here until you’ve learned a lesson. | 除非你吸取教训 否则你得一直呆在这儿 |
| [09:59] | Oh, you’re getting an angry spanking now! | 别怪我现在就冲出来打你屁股 |
| [10:02] | – Get me out of here, Woody. – Well, I… no! | – 把我弄出去 Woody – 我… 不行 |
| [10:04] | No, I made my decision, and I’m sticking to it! | 不 我决意已定 绝不会动摇 |
| [10:07] | Good-bye, Malloy! | 再见了 Malloy |
| [10:09] | Be strong, Papa Bear. | 坚强点 熊他爸 |
| [10:11] | Don’t look back. It’s called tough love. | 别回头 这叫爱之深 责之切 |
| [10:17] | Oh, what the… | 日 搞毛… |
| [10:18] | What the hell’s wrong with you? Leave me alone! | 你他娘有啥毛病? 离我远点 |
| [10:25] | Damn, I don’t remember prison being this scary back in the day. | 靠啊 我没记着以前的监狱这么恐怖来着 |
| [10:27] | Oh, come on, Denzel. It ain’t that bad. | 别怕 Denzel 没啥了不起的 |
| [10:31] | Ohba, shibbit! | 哇 擦 |
| [10:33] | – Man, we’re gonna die in here! – Chill out, D. There’s four of us. | – 兄弟 咱会死在这里的 – 冷静点 D仔 咱有四个人呢 |
| [10:36] | As long as we stick together, we’ll be fine. | 只要咱齐心协力 绝对没事的 |
| [10:38] | That’s right, suckas! | 说得好 你们这些傻X |
| [10:40] | Nobody’s gonna mess with the cool friends gang! | 我倒要看看谁敢惹咱”酷友帮” |
| [10:43] | Who wants to step to this, huh? Nobody? | 谁先自告奋勇 嗯? 没人敢吗? |
| [10:46] | That’s what I thou… | 我想的也是… |
| [10:48] | They call me “Meat Hammer,” because I got a Meat Hammer. | 他们都叫我”肉锤” 因为我长了个肉锤锤 |
| [10:51] | And I don’t mean a tenderizing utensil. | 我指的不是锤肉的厨具 |
| [10:53] | – Got it. – I mean a Meat Hammer. | – 我懂的 – 我指的就是肉锤锤 |
| [10:55] | – Uh huh. – In my pants. | – 呃哼 – 裤子里的肉锤 |
| [10:57] | – Following you. – You know what? | – 听懂了 – 算了吧 |
| [10:59] | I’m just gonna go ahead and spell it out for you. | 我直接跟你说清楚好了 |
| [11:01] | – I’m referring to my dick. – I got it! | – 我说的是我鸡鸡 – 晓得了 |
| [11:08] | ‘Sup, bitch? Como se llama, ese? | 干嘛呢 贱人 你叫啥 小子? (西语) |
| [11:11] | Of course I’d like chips and salsa. You guys got any queso? | 我当然喜欢薯片和沙司啦 你们还有奶酪吗? |
| [11:14] | Hey, watch your mouth, son! This is Paco, leader of the Latin Kings. | 别装疯卖傻的 小子 这位是Paco “拉丁王者”的领袖 |
| [11:18] | That’s a weird name for a landscaping company. | 园林绿化公司起这种名字实在太怪了 |
| [11:20] | – What? I’m gonna kill… – Knock, knock. | – 什么? 老子宰了… – 有人在吗? |
| [11:23] | – Oh, who’s there? – Amish Hank. | – 是谁呀? – 龊屎牛 |
| [11:26] | – Uh, amish Hank who? – I’ma shank you! | – 哪个龊屎牛啊? – 老子戳死你 |
| [11:37] | Yeah, it’s been real lonely in here since my last cellmate died. | 哎呀 自打我上个舍友死了之后 这里变得好寂寞呢 |
| [11:41] | How’d he die? | 怎么死的? |
| [11:42] | The Doc in the infirmary said his anus got turned inside out… somehow. | 医务室的说他是因为肛门外翻而死 也不知道咋整的 |
| [11:47] | – You boys are free to go. – Yeah, that’s what I thought! | – 你们几个小子可以走了 – 好 不出我所料 |
| [11:50] | Can’t no prison contain the cool friends gang. | 没有监狱可以关得住”酷友帮” |
| [11:52] | – Move out my way! – Not you, son. | – 别挡我的道 – 你不行 小子 |
| [11:54] | – Just your friends. – Yeah, man, sorry about that. | – 只许你的朋友走 – 兄弟 对不住啦 |
| [11:57] | I could only call in favors for the three of us. | 我只找得到救三个人的路子 |
| [11:59] | Hey, what about sticking together? | 说好的”齐心协力”呢? |
| [12:01] | The only thing you need to be concerned about | 你现在唯一需要担心的就是 |
| [12:03] | sticking together is your butt cheeks. | 好好夹紧你的屁股蛋子就行 |
| [12:06] | You gonna be doing a hard 12 in here. | 你得呆在这里陪我的12啦 |
| [12:09] | And I don’t mean 12 years of hard time. | 我指的可不是12年的苦狱 |
| [12:12] | – I mean 12… – I know! | – 我指的是我12英寸的… – 晓得 |
| [12:16] | All right, everyone, thank you for coming to audition. | 是这样的 大家 谢谢你们来参加面试 |
| [12:18] | As you know, my ex-best friend Denzel | 你们都知道 我的前基友Denzel |
| [12:21] | is rotting in a prison because he’s a class-a jerk. | 正在吃牢饭 因为他就是个顶级大混蛋 |
| [12:23] | Which means one of you is going to replace him as my partner | 这也就意味着你们其中一个要取替他 |
| [12:27] | in the Tol-Con costume contest. | 做我”托尔金会展”COS比赛搭档 |
| [12:29] | Contest? Craigslist said “horse costume”. | 比赛? 你在同城网上不是说”化装成马”? |
| [12:33] | I thought this was a furry freak sex party! | 我还以为是那种化装成动物的性交聚会呢 |
| [12:35] | This is not a furry freak sex party. | 这不是化装动物的淫乱好吧 |
| [12:41] | Jorge, wait! | Jorge 等一下 |
| [12:42] | What I meant was, we’re going to a furry sex party. | 我说的意思是 比赛完咱就去动物化装淫乱派对 |
| [12:46] | Yes! You haven’t lived till you’ve contracted herpes from a gigantic squirrel! | 赞 你不从”大松鼠”那儿染点疱疹 你就算白活 |
| [12:59] | ♪ Gonna visit my cubsy wubs in the big, scary prison. ♪ | ♪ 我要去可怕的大监狱 看我的熊仔 ♪ |
| [13:02] | ♪ Gonna bring him home because he has learned his lesson. ♪ | ♪ 要把他带回家家 因为他已经学乖 ♪ |
| [13:04] | What the hell? | 搞毛啊? |
| [13:07] | Okay, so look, Vato, Tuco over in cell 31? | 听着 有情况 Vato 31号房的Tuco |
| [13:10] | He shows me no respect. He’s gotta go. | 对我没大没小的 摆平他 |
| [13:12] | Yo, I’ll take care of it. | 好 我会搞定的 |
| [13:14] | Wait, but I am Tuco. | 等一下 我就是Tuco啊 |
| [13:19] | Cubsy wubs? | 小毛球? |
| [13:21] | What’d you call our leader, ese? | 兄弟 你喊我们老大什么来着? |
| [13:23] | You want for me to make this bitch ass dead? | 您想让我弄死这死贱人吗? |
| [13:25] | No, that’s cool, dog. I think I remember this fool from back in the hood. | 不用 没关系的 老弟 这家伙好像是我以前帮会的小弟 |
| [13:29] | What happened to you, Malloy? | 他们拿你怎么了 Malloy? |
| [13:30] | Nothing happened to me, gringo. This is my family now. | 他们没拿我怎么样 老哥 现在这里就是我家啦 |
| [13:34] | Julio, is that my moon pie? | Julio 你在吃我的月亮派吗? |
| [13:37] | I knew it, Malloy! I knew tough love was a bad idea! | 我就知道 Malloy “严爱”简直就是扯淡 |
| [13:40] | I never should’ve listened to those asshole Rangers. | 我就不该听信那些傻X林警的 |
| [13:43] | Don’t you worry. Daddy is gonna bust you outta here. | 别担心 老爹会把你弄出去的 |
| [13:46] | Bust me out? This is my home, homes. | 弄我出去? 这就是我家啦 老哥 |
| [13:48] | I ain’t going nowhere. | 我哪儿也不去 |
| [13:50] | Brah, I heard Vato killed Julio and Tuco. | 兄弟 我听说Vato把Julio和Tuco都干掉了 |
| [13:52] | He is out of control. Take him out. | 他失控了 把他解决掉 |
| [14:05] | Okay, Jorge, there’s the line for the costume contest. | 好啦 Jorge COS比赛在那边排队 |
| [14:08] | When does the furry sex commence? | 那性交派对啥时候开始呢? |
| [14:10] | My sack grows tight with anticipation! | 我满蛋蛋的期待啊 |
| [14:13] | In a minute. Come on. | 一会儿的 咱赶快 |
| [14:14] | Left, right, left. | 左 右 左 |
| [14:16] | Shorten your gait. | 步子跟紧点 |
| [14:17] | – Come on. – What the… what the [Bleep]? | – 快走 – 我靠 搞毛 |
| [14:19] | Denzel could do it. What’s so hard about this? | Denzel都做得到 这能有多难 |
| [14:22] | Because my eyes sting from the fumes coming from your anus. | 是因为你的屁辣了我的眼 |
| [14:26] | You smell like the Middle East! | 你闻起来就像中东人 |
| [14:32] | Hey, great Gollum costume. | 你这”咕噜”扮得真像 |
| [14:33] | I have Progeria. | 我是得了早衰症 |
| [14:37] | Okay, we’re next! I think we’ve still got a shot at winning. | 好 我们上 我觉得我们还是有机率获胜的 |
| [14:40] | – I’m sorry, you’re disqualified. – What? Why? | – 对不起 你被取消参赛资格了 – 什么? 为什么啊? |
| [14:43] | Yeah, you’re disqualified because you’re missing the back half of your costume. | 你被取消资格 因为你还缺少服装的另一半 |
| [14:46] | Jorge Jorge! | |
| [14:47] | You are the biggest, sexiest furry in here. | 你是这里最粗犷 最性感的动物啦 |
| [14:50] | Tell me, what are you, a bear? Huh? | 快告诉我 你扮的是什么 熊吗? 嗯? |
| [14:52] | A gorilla? | 大猩猩? |
| [14:53] | I’m Peter Jackson. | 我Peter Jackson |
| [14:58] | Here, relax. Have some toilet wine. | 来 安啦 喝点”茅坑红酒”呗 |
| [15:01] | Nah, nah, I’m good. I had a bunch of shitter sake earlier. | 不用 我够了 之前喝了点”便所清酒” |
| [15:04] | Now, I don’t want to just make love. We should get to know each other. | 我不想一上来就做爱 我们应该彼此了解 |
| [15:07] | Ooh, good idea. We should have lots of long conversations. | 好主意 我们应该好好促膝长谈一番 |
| [15:11] | – What’s your favorite color? – Blue. | – 你最喜欢什么颜色? – 蓝色 |
| [15:13] | – Okay, let’s do it. – What? | – 好了 来吧 – 啥? |
| [15:15] | Hey, hey, that’s not gonna fit! It ain’t gonna fit! | 嘿 嘿 塞不下诶 塞不下诶 |
| [15:17] | Not so fast! | 先别急 |
| [15:19] | You cannot have sex with this man. | 你不能和这个男人上床 |
| [15:21] | Oh, thank you, baby Jesus! | 谢谢您嘞 耶稣亲大爷 |
| [15:24] | – Until after you marry him. – Wait, come again? | – 必须先把他娶过门 – 等下 再说一遍 |
| [15:28] | I run a good Christian prison here. | 我管理的是基督教监狱 |
| [15:31] | And I don’t allow any intercourse under my roof | 不允许在我的眼皮底下发生任何形式的交媾 |
| [15:34] | unless you share a union in the eyes of God. | 除非你们在耶稣的见证下结合 |
| [15:39] | Call the caterer, boys. | 联系筹备人 伙计们 |
| [15:40] | We’re having us a gay prison wedding! | 我们要举行同志婚礼了 |
| [15:43] | Oh, boy! We’re getting married! | 天呐 我们要结婚了 |
| [15:45] | – Wait, what’s the rush? – I’m a romantic. | – 等下 这有何急? – 我很浪漫 |
| [15:48] | And I got AIDS. | 还有艾滋 |
| [15:52] | All right, Brickleberry’s finest. | 好了 脆莓精英们 |
| [15:53] | Denzel’s about to become a human condom | Denzel快变成肉体避孕套了 |
| [15:55] | and my poor little baby has been brainwashed by a gang of landscapers. | 而我的小乖被一群园艺工人给洗脑了 |
| [15:59] | And we are gonna bust ’em both out. | 我们要一举救出他们 |
| [16:01] | Bust them out? That prison’s harder to get into than a sheep’s panties. | 救出他们? 要进那监狱比脱山羊裤子还难 |
| [16:04] | True, Hazelhurst penitentiary is notorious for two things… | 没错 Hazelhurst以两件事最臭名昭著 |
| [16:08] | One, its airtight security, and two, its fondness for forced homosexual weddings. | 第一 监管严密 第二 热衷举办强制性同志婚礼 |
| [16:13] | We’re gonna pose as a wedding events crew, slip in | 我们要打扮成婚庆团队 混进去 |
| [16:15] | and be gone with our friends before the rice pilaf is even cold. | 在卤肉饭凉了之前和伙伴们逃之夭夭 |
| [16:19] | Oh, my God, I’ve always wanted to plan a wedding! | 天呐 我一直想策划一场婚礼来着呢 |
| [16:21] | Easy there, Bridezilla. You’re on cake and flowers. | 淡定 难缠新娘 你负责蛋糕和鲜花 |
| [16:24] | – Connie, you’re the photographer. – Can I grab a couple titty pics of Ethel? | – Connie 你是摄影师 – 可以拍几张Ethel胸部的照片吗? |
| [16:28] | Firecracker Jim, you’re on demolition. | 火爆Jim 你负责爆破 |
| [16:30] | When you hear, “dun, duh, dun, dun, dun,” blow us an escape route! | 一听到婚礼进行曲时 就给咱们炸出一条出口 |
| [16:33] | Hell, yeah! Blowing shit up was my major in college! | 包咱身上了 咱大学就主修怎么把东西炸飞 |
| [16:37] | I didn’t know Brickleberry had a college. | 我没听说脆莓还有大学 |
| [16:39] | That’s because I blew it up! | 因为被我给炸飞了 |
| [16:41] | Them prison guards are gonna be packing a lot of heat, but so will we. | 然后监狱警卫就会大量武装 我们也一样 |
| [16:44] | When they start firing at us, poom! | 等他们开始朝我们开火 咱就… |
| [16:46] | Hey, look at me! I’m like a stripper with guns! | 瞧我 我看上去像个拿枪的脱衣舞娘 |
| [16:49] | Just like Granny Possumcods. She used to hold us at gunpoint and give us lap dances. | 就像Possumcods奶奶 她曾拿枪顶着我们脑袋 给我们跳了段脱衣舞 |
| [16:53] | I love Christmas. | 我爱圣诞节 |
| [16:54] | All right, team, let’s do this. | 好了 队员们 行动吧 |
| [16:59] | Hola, negro. | 你好啊 黑鬼 |
| [17:01] | Me and my boys just wanted to come down and give you a little wedding present. | 我和我兄弟就想过来给你一份小小的结婚礼物 |
| [17:06] | – Sweet, a shank. – No, it’s a toothbrush. | – 真好 一根细棍 – 不是 这是牙刷 |
| [17:09] | I figured you should have fresh breath while Meat Hammer | 我心想肉锤跟你啪啪啪整得你肛门外翻时 |
| [17:11] | turns your asshole inside out. | 你不应该有口臭 |
| [17:14] | Oh, no! How are we gonna get past the guards? | 不 我们该怎么过警卫的关卡? |
| [17:17] | Now everybody just stay cool. I got a whole back story worked out. | 大家保持冷静 我有一整套后备计划会管用的 |
| [17:21] | Good day, mate. Name’s Rick Swordfire. | 好呀伙计 我叫剑火Rick |
| [17:23] | I’m a bisexual Pisces who loves analingus. | 我是热爱舔肛的双性双鱼座 |
| [17:26] | How do you spell your last name? | 你的姓怎么拼? |
| [17:33] | All right. Let’s go! | 好了 咱们走 |
| [17:43] | – Hey, buddy, you okay? – No, not really. | – 伙计 你还好吧 – 不 不好 |
| [17:46] | I got screwed over by my best friend. | 我被最好的朋友放鸽子了 |
| [17:48] | Now I’ll probably never get to meet my hero. | 现在我可能再也见不到我的偶像了 |
| [17:50] | Come on, man. Sure you will. | 别垂头丧气的 伙计 你当然会见到 |
| [17:53] | Viggo Mortens… Viggo Mortens… | |
| [17:56] | Life is too short to be mad at your best friend. | 人生苦短 何必去责备你的死党呢? |
| [17:59] | You’re right, Viggo. And now he’s in a lot of trouble. | 说的没错 Viggo 现在他有大麻烦了 |
| [18:02] | He’s being forced to marry this guy in prison. | 他被强迫嫁给一个监狱里的家伙 |
| [18:04] | What? You need to help your friend. Think like a Hobbit, man. | 什么? 你得去救你朋友 像霍比特人一样 伙计 |
| [18:08] | You think that, uh, “Fredo” would allow “Gandar” to… | 你就这么想 Fredo会让Gandar去… |
| [18:11] | He’d use the invisibility, uh, necklace, uh… | 他会用隐形的… 项链… |
| [18:15] | All right, I’m sorry. I never saw those goddamn movies. | 好吧 抱歉 我没看过那部天杀的电影 |
| [18:28] | When that guy’s done with Denzel’s rectum | 等那家伙倒腾完Denzel的后庭 |
| [18:30] | people will pay to see Evel Knievel jump it. | 大家就会花钱去看摩托车惊险表演 |
| [18:41] | Okay, Firecracker Jim, blow it! | 好了 火爆Jim 开炸 |
| [18:48] | Those inbred hillbillies [Bleep] up their cue! | 近亲繁殖的乡巴佬特么听不懂提示啊 |
| [18:50] | Yeah, sorry about that. | 是呢 这事儿挺抱歉 |
| [18:52] | What the hell are you guys doing here? | 你们特么跑这里来干个鸟? |
| [18:54] | Well, yeah, we kinda got arrested on the way over here. | 因为那啥 咱们在来的路上被逮住了 |
| [18:57] | Turns out smoking meth while driving is a parole violation. | 原来开车时候抽大麻是无权保释的 |
| [19:01] | God damn it. Well, at least we’ve still got a giant wedding cake filled with guns. | 他奶奶的 至少我们还有装满枪支的巨大蛋糕 |
| [19:05] | Yeah, about that, there was just no way to get the guns inside | 关于那个吧… 实在没办法把枪放在里面 |
| [19:09] | without messing up the lavender buttercream frosting. | 又不破坏薰衣草奶油糖霜 |
| [19:11] | Sorry. | 抱歉 |
| [19:12] | Ethel, are you telling me that rather than springing Malloy and Denzel | Ethel 你是说我们不是来救Malloy和Denzel的 |
| [19:16] | we’re actually here to cater a goddamn wedding? | 我们其实是来操办这该死的婚礼的吗? |
| [19:20] | No, a beautiful goddamn wedding! | 才不 是美得要死的婚礼 |
| [19:29] | Dearly incarcerated | 亲爱的囚徒们 |
| [19:31] | we are gathered to witness the union between Meat Hammer and Denzel. | 我们集聚一堂共同见证肉锤和Denzel的结合 |
| [19:36] | Which shall last forever. | 一生一世 |
| [19:38] | For while gay marriage may be legal in our fine state… | 同志婚姻在咱们这个可爱的州是合法的 |
| [19:43] | Gay divorce is not. | 同志离婚可不是 |
| [19:46] | Meat Hammer, do you take Denzel to be your lawfully wedded gay prison partner? | 肉锤 你愿意娶Denzel作为你合法的监狱伴侣吗? |
| [19:52] | You bet I do. | 当然愿意 |
| [19:53] | And, Denzel, do you take Meat Hammer? | Denzel 你愿意接受肉锤吗? |
| [19:58] | Say it. You better say it. | 快答应 你赶紧答应 |
| [20:00] | I, uh… I d… | 我… 我… |
| [20:08] | Holy shit! Is that Viggo Mortensen? | 我擦 是Viggo Mortensen吗? |
| [20:10] | Man, his career is in the shitter! | 靠 他这事业与日俱屎啊 |
| [20:12] | I, Lord Of The Rings, command you… stop this wedding! | 我 魔戒之主 命令你 取消婚礼 |
| [20:22] | Steve, you saved me! | Steve 你救了我 |
| [20:24] | That’s what best friends are for! | 不然要好朋友还干嘛呢 |
| [20:26] | – Look, Steve, I’m sorry for… – Already forgiven. | – 听着 Steve 我很抱歉… – 已经原谅啦 |
| [20:28] | Now let’s get you out of here the quickest way possible… | 现在咱们赶紧以最快速度离开这里 |
| [20:31] | As two grown men in a horse suit. | 以两男套一马的形式 |
| [20:33] | Sounds good. I’ll take it from here. | 听上去不错 我在这一边 |
| [20:35] | Wait a minute! | 等下 |
| [20:36] | This is not a furry fook fest either! | 这可不是毛茸茸的集会 |
| [20:39] | Let’s ride, Steve! | 我们走 Steve |
| [20:41] | Giddyup, partner! | 好嘞 伙计 |
| [20:43] | No, no, leave me! I love it here! | 不要 不要 放开我 我喜欢这里 |
| [20:46] | Shadowfax, away! | 影疾 出发 |
| [20:51] | Now if somebody could only explain to me what the [Bleep] just happened? | 求问 有没人给我解释下这特么到底怎么回事? |