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马男波杰克(BoJack Horseman)第3季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 马男波杰克(BoJack Horseman)第3季第9集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
时间 英文 中文
[00:15] “还好我没做那个节目” 《穴居人》制作人如是说
[00:22] BoJack! Beautiful day, huh? 波杰克 天气不错吧
[00:24] Perfect day to go outside, not read the trades 应该出门走走 不要关注收视率
[00:26] or talk to anyone in the industry 也不要跟公司的人说话
[00:28] or watch entertainment television 也不要看娱乐评论节目
[00:30] or have a gut feeling about the ratings 更不要凭直觉判断
[00:31] for your television show last night. 昨晚的收视率如何
[00:33] Princess Carolyn, I’m dying. 卡洛琳公主 我要死了
[00:35] Damn it, you read the trades. 该死 你看了收视率
[00:36] My heart is in my stomach, my stomach is in my butt, 我的心到了胃里 我的胃到了屁股里
[00:39] and my butt ran away with the spoon. 而我的屁股跟着勺子跑了
[00:41] That makes sense because your butt is quite a dish. 说得通 毕竟你的屁股非常可口
[00:44] Can you come over? I need you. 你能不能过来 我需要你
[00:50] What the…? 怎么回…
[00:52] I ordered a few feel-better pizzas to feel better. 我叫了”安慰”披萨来安慰自己
[00:56] It did not work. 没什么卵用
[00:57] Then I sprinkled happy pills on them, 然后我就撒了点快乐药片
[00:59] and washed it all down 为了顺利咽下去
[00:59] with a “Please, God, make my pain go away” Vermouth 又喝了”上帝请带走我的痛苦”苦艾酒
[01:02] and ice cream float. 和漂浮冰淇淋
[01:03] – Somehow I feel worse. – That’s a real mystery. -但是感觉却更糟糕了 -我不是很懂
[01:05] My show was terrible. 我的节目糟透了
[01:06] Why did I insist on a mockumentary format? 我为什么要做伪纪录片式的节目
[01:09] It’s already an overused trope now, in 2007. 2007年 这修辞早就被用烂了
[01:12] Hey! Mockumentary is not a trope, 伪纪录片不是修辞手法
[01:14] it’s a device for storytelling. 是叙事方式
[01:16] And your show is daring and cutting edge. 你的节目非常大胆 走在时代尖端
[01:18] People just aren’t ready. 只是观众没有准备好
[01:19] Yeah. Yeah, people! It’s not me. 没错 怪观众 不怪我
[01:22] It’s the people that are the problem! 问题在于观众
[01:24] Everyone’s dumb and I am great. 众人皆醉我独醒
[01:26] Why do I always forget that? 我为什么总忘记这一点呢
[01:27] That’s the spirit. 就是这种劲头
[01:29] I’m starting to think this show 我开始觉得这个节目
[01:30] is the best thing that happened to me. 是我遇到的最好的事
[01:32] – Really? – Yeah. -真的吗 -对
[01:32] Cuz it made me realize 因为它让我意识到
[01:34] you’re the best thing that happened to me, 你是我遇到的最好的人
[01:35] with your sexy cat eyes and your cute little hair curl. 猫眼如此性感 还有可爱的小卷毛
[01:38] You look like a soft serve strawberry ice cream. 你看起来就像软软的草莓冰淇淋
[01:42] BoJack, we can’t. I’m your agent. 波杰克 不能这样 我是你的经纪人
[01:44] You are so much more than that. 你远远不止是我的经纪人
[01:46] You’re my lighthouse, my Garmin. 你是我的灯塔 我的导航
[01:48] You’re the little plastic table they put in pizza boxes 你就是那披萨盒子里
[01:50] to keep the pizza from getting smushed. 保护着披萨的塑封垫片
[01:52] You’re Princess Carolyn. 你是卡洛琳公主
[02:00] Don’t you break my heart, BoJack Horseman. 你不许伤我的心 马男波杰克
[02:03] – What? – What? Nothing. -你说什么 -什么 没什么
[02:04] Did you just say something to me? 你跟我说话了吗
[02:05] No, I was just being wistful, I guess. 没有 我只是在想事情
[02:07] Well, can you be wistful a little quieter? 那你能不能安静点想
[02:10] Not everyone is interested in your wist. 并不是每个人都想知道你在想什么
[02:12] Okay, BoJack. 好 波杰克
[02:16] – You smell nice. – Thanks, BoJack. -你闻着好香 -谢谢 波杰克
[03:23] Okay, gotta go. 我得挂了
[03:24] I’m about to meet my most important client. 我要见我最重要的客户了
[03:26] I know you’re not really on the phone. 我知道你只是在假装打电话
[03:28] Bye, Mr. President. 再见 总统先生
[03:29] Give my love to your basketball friends. You too. 替我向你的篮球朋友们问好 你也是
[03:33] So, should we get dinner, or are you just thinking drinks? 要点餐吗 还是只点喝的就好
[03:35] – I’m not planning on staying long. – Oh, okay. -我不会待很久 -那好吧
[03:38] I’m glad you wanted to meet, 很高兴你约了我
[03:39] because I am so pumped to tell you 因为我等不及要告诉你
[03:41] all about the exciting projects I’m lining up for you. 我为你安排了多少项目
[03:44] That won’t be necessary. 不必了
[03:45] Once you get your Oscar nom, 只要你拿到奥斯卡提名
[03:46] we’ll have our pick. That’s the key. 就可以随便挑了 这才是关键
[03:48] You think Halle Berry would’ve been offered Catwoman 如果哈莉·贝瑞没有得奥斯卡奖
[03:51] if she wasn’t an Oscar winner? 她能有机会演猫女吗
[03:52] We just gotta find you your Catwoman. 我们只要找到适合你的”猫女”即可
[03:54] I’m not sure if a Catwoman 我觉得猫女
[03:56] is really the best thing for my career right now. 并不适合我现在的事业走向
[03:59] Right, well, like I said, we are getting lots of offers. 也是 不过我们还有很多其他选择
[04:02] Listen, Princess Carolyn– 听我说 卡洛琳公主
[04:02] Signore Horseman! Principessa Carolina! 马男先生 卡洛琳公主[意大利语]
[04:06] Sandro, how you doing, you handsome devil? 桑卓小帅哥 最近怎么样
[04:08] To be honest I am, how you say, sweating bull’s nets. 说实话 怎么说呢 大汗”牛篱”
[04:11] – You mean sweating bullets? – I don’t think so. -你是说大汗淋漓吗 -不是
[04:14] Sweating bullets. How does that make the sense? 大汗淋漓 根本说不通嘛
[04:16] How does sweating bull’s nets make sense? 那请问您的大汗”牛篱”何解
[04:18] I don’t want to be caught in bull’s nets. 跟公牛一起关在牛篱中很可怕啊
[04:20] He may try to, I don’t know, kiss me. 他万一那什么 亲我怎么办
[04:22] I prefer kissing cows. 我更喜欢亲母牛
[04:23] No judgment, just a preference. 并不是歧视 只是个人喜好
[04:25] I love kissing cows! 我特别喜欢亲母牛
[04:27] Don’t tell my wife. I’m kidding! 别告诉我妻子 开玩笑的
[04:29] She knows. She’s a cow! 她知道 她就是一头母牛
[04:31] And I only kiss her. 而我只亲她
[04:35] Okay, very good. 好了 非常好
[04:36] Sandro, haven’t you lived in America for like 30 years? 桑卓 你不是在美国住了快30年吗
[04:38] Ignore him. Why are you sweating bullets and/or nets? 别理他 所以你为什么会大汗”牛”漓
[04:42] Because there is a restaurant critic here tonight. 因为今天晚上有个美食评论家来了
[04:47] Very interesting. 有趣得很
[04:51] Critics are the worst. That’s my review of critics. 评论家最讨厌了 这是我对评论家的评论
[04:53] Two thumbs down! Four percent fresh! 两个差评 新鲜度4%
[04:55] One star! You all eat a flat butt! 一星 都吃屎去吧
[04:58] Did you not know there was a critic here? 你不知道有评论家会来吗
[05:00] You own this place. 这可是你的餐厅
[05:01] But I never see you do anything to help run it. 不过从来没见过你出什么力
[05:03] This place runs itself. Right, Sandro? 餐厅自己能运作 是吧 桑卓
[05:05] Well, my wife and children and therapy man 我的老婆和孩子 还有心理医生
[05:08] may not agree so much, 大概不太同意
[05:09] but if you say so, Signore Horseman. 不过马男先生 您说的都对
[05:11] Even his wife and kids and therapy man agree. 连他老婆孩子和心理医生都同意
[05:13] Well, as the Black Guy Pete say, 正如黑眼”舅舅”[黑眼豆豆]所说
[05:16] “Tonight’s gonna be a good night.” “今晚一定要嗨”
[05:18] Please. Enjoy. 祝用餐愉快
[05:20] I know you’re not happy 我知道你不开心
[05:21] about what happened with the Kelsey project. 凯尔西那个项目进展不顺
[05:22] I get it. I pushed a little too hard 我明白 为了让你拿到应得的钱
[05:24] to get you the money you deserve. 我有些操之过急了
[05:26] What can I say? 我能说什么
[05:27] Sometimes I’m too good of an agent, so deals fall apart. 有时候我的工作能力太强 容易适得其反
[05:30] That’s a thing that happens when agents are really good. 经纪人能力强的时候就容易出现这种情况
[05:32] – That’s not– – Moving forward! -我不这样认为… -下一个话题
[05:34] I know you’re not happy with how I handled Ethan Around. 我知道你不喜欢我对《胡闹的伊森》的处理结果
[05:36] – Or didn’t handle it. – Bygones! -你根本没处理 -都过去了
[05:38] It was just because I was busy getting you the Pegasus movie, 那是因为我忙着帮你搞定飞马那部电影
[05:41] which I know you did not get, 我知道你最后没有演成
[05:42] but trust me, you’ll see not getting these movies 但是相信我 总有一天你会发现
[05:45] was the best thing that ever happened to you. 没演这些电影是你遇到的最好的事
[05:47] Onwards and upwards! Tally ho! To the stars! 塞翁失马焉知非福 呔嗬 要上天
[05:50] Okay, you’re forcing me to use the cards. 好吧 这是你逼我的
[05:54] “Princess Carolyn, clear throat, “卡洛琳公主 清嗓子
[05:57] I have been very disappointed–“ 我对你非常失望…”
[05:59] Ring! Hello, Your Highness. 铃铃铃 喂 国王陛下
[06:01] It’s a king, I have to take this. In the bathroom. 是国王打来的 我必须得接 在卫生间里接
[06:04] Oh, fish, oh, fish! 天呐 天呐
[06:07] Who’s out there? Are you talking to me? 谁在那儿 你是在跟我说话吗
[06:09] No. 不是
[06:11] All right, Pink Lady, think. 好了 小粉 冷静想想
[06:13] – Are you talking to me? – Are you a pink lady? -你在跟我说话吗 -你是粉红姐妹会的吗
[06:15] I was a Pink Lady 我曾经是
[06:16] in my high school’s production of Grease. 就在我们高中演的《油脂》里
[06:18] – Were you Rizzo? – No, Jan. -你演的是里索吗 -不 是珍
[06:21] Then don’t waste my time. 那就别浪费我时间了
[06:28] Now, let us bow our heads and bray. 现在 让我们低头祷叫一下
[06:43] Yes, right away! 好 马上去办
[06:45] So back to what you were– 让我们回到原先的…
[06:50] – Oh, my goodness, what is this? – Yeah, what is this? -天呐 这是什么 -是啊 这是什么
[06:53] *Happy 23 years working together* *一起共事23周年快乐*
[06:56] *Join me* *跟我一起唱*
[06:57] Oh, my God. 天呐
[06:58] – *23, 23 years* – *23 years* -*23 23周年* -*23周年*
[07:00] You’re making this up. 这是你编的吧
[07:01] – *Happy 23 years working together* – *Happy 23years* -*共事23周年快乐* -*23周年快乐*
[07:04] *Can you believe this, two plus three equal 23* *难以置信吧 2加3等于23*
[07:06] This is just stream of consciousness. 这是意识流吧
[07:08] – *23 years working together* – *23 years* -*一起共事23周年* -*23周年*
[07:13] Okay, cool. 好吧 就这样
[07:15] Can you believe it, BoJack? 你相信吗 波杰克
[07:17] It’s been almost a quarter of a century. 这个世纪都己经过了四分之一了
[07:19] Talking on the phone pretty much every day, 每天互通电话很多次
[07:21] sharing our deepest dreams and secrets, 分享心灵最深处的梦想与秘密
[07:24] being there for each other through all of it, bosom friends, 互相扶持度过难关的知心好友
[07:27] Anne of Green Gables style. 就像《清秀佳人》里那样
[07:28] Let’s toast to another 23 years. What do you say? 让我们为下一个23年举杯欢庆如何
[07:31] You’re fired. 你被炒了
[07:34] I can’t believe this. You’re firing me? 难以置信 你居然要炒我
[07:36] – Me? – What? No. -居然是我 -什么 不是啊
[07:38] You have no idea, everything I do around here! 你根本不清楚我为这里付出了多少
[07:41] – Half the kitchen staff is my family. – No. -厨房里一半的员工都是我的家人 -不
[07:43] – Honestly, just– – I detest you! -老实说 只是… -我恨你
[07:45] I hope you rot in the hell! 我咒你下地狱
[07:47] We’re headed down a road that– 你完全理解错…
[07:48] You washed-up has-been no-good joke! 你的事业告吹做笑话都不配
[07:51] You are the opposite of an onion, 你和洋葱恰恰相反
[07:53] because if I cut you, I am no gonna cry. 因为如果我把你剁了 我一滴眼泪都不会流
[07:56] Well, now you are fired. 好吧 现在你真被炒了
[07:58] Good luck finding 祝你有幸能找到
[07:59] another charming first-generation Italian immigrant 第二个像我这样既有魅力 口音又好听
[08:02] with this kind of darling accent, 还能用语言梗来搞笑的
[08:04] who makes equally delightful malapropisms! 第一代意大利移民
[08:07] You, sir, have just cut off your nose 你 先生 刚把自己的马鼻给切了
[08:10] and thrown Sprite in your face! 还往自己脸上砸了罐雪碧
[08:13] I am a classic stereotype 这年头已经很难遇见
[08:15] that is tough to come by nowadays, 像我这么原汁原味的意大利人了
[08:18] because Italians don’t emigrate so much 因为意大利人已经不怎么
[08:20] to America no more. 移民到美国了
[08:21] Botticelli, Barbarelli, Beetle Bailey! 波提切利 巴巴芮拉 甲壳虫贝利
[08:24] Modigliani, Masaccio, Marmaduke! 莫迪里阿尼 马萨乔 马默杜克
[08:27] Avanti, all of you! Andiamo! 阿凡提 所有人 我们走
[08:30] So that was weird, huh? 真奇怪啊 不是吗
[08:34] Please stop looking at me. 请不要再盯着我看了
[08:36] Too bad about Sandro, huh? 桑卓可真惨 对不对
[08:38] You’re the one who’s fired, obviously. 很显然你才是被炒的那个人
[08:43] Right. 没错
[08:43] Ryan Murphy is doing a re-imagining 瑞恩·墨菲想重拍
[08:45] of The Life and Times of Harriet Tubman. 《哈莉特·塔布曼的一生》
[08:47] But in this version, she’s a tub-man, 只不过这次她是个浴缸人
[08:50] with the comparative strength and agility of a tub! 力大无穷 如浴缸般灵敏迅捷
[08:53] – PC. – He’s looking for someone -PC -他想找个人来演
[08:54] to play the Underground Railroad conductor. 地下逃亡线的引路人
[08:54] 十九世纪美国秘密路线网络和避难所 用以帮助黑奴逃亡
[08:57] Great, but you don’t represent me anymore. 很好 但你已经不再代理我了
[08:59] Okay, I get it. I’m fired. Sheesk. 好 我懂了 我被炒了 行了吗
[09:01] You’re gonna spend a couple days being mad at me, 你要花上好几天来对我发泄怒气
[09:04] then I’ll get you another gig, 接着我会帮你争取个片约
[09:05] and you’ll be my client again, just like every time. 这样你就又成了我的客户 每回都是这样
[09:08] Can we get past the part where you’re mad at me 我们能不能直接跳过你生气这一段
[09:10] and get to the part 直接进入到
[09:11] where you’re stealing General Lee’s plutonium 你把李将军的钚燃料偷来
[09:13] to fuel your subterranean steam-punk slave-tram? 给你那地下蒸汽朋克黑奴逃亡列车加油那一段好吗
[09:17] “It’s best, for both of us, “这样对我们都好
[09:18] if we end this relationship once and for all.” 只要我们能彻底一刀两断”
[09:22] Bojack, I’m sorry I screwed up, 波杰克 很抱歉我把事情搞砸了
[09:24] you don’t have to read off the– 可你也用不着读…
[09:25] “You take me for granted, “你未经我的同意
[09:26] made decisions that were against my wishes, 擅自做了有违我心意的决定
[09:28] and worst of all she’s got my globes a-warming!” 最糟糕的是 她让我的”球球”变暖
[09:32] Wait, what? 等等 你说什么
[09:32] – How did that get in there? – What is that? -怎么突然跳到这儿了 -那是什么
[09:34] A punch line to a joke from the roast of January Jones. 詹纽瑞·琼斯吐槽大会上我要讲的梗
[09:36] A global warming joke? 全球变暖的笑话吗
[09:38] It’s an important issue. Here we go. 那是个很重要的问题 我们继续
[09:39] “Our relationship no longer has any–“ “我们之间的关系不再有任何…”
[09:41] “January has only gotten hotter and hot–” Nope. “一月变得越来越热…” 不是这里
[09:44] Were you at the roast of January Jones? 你受邀出席詹纽瑞·琼斯吐槽大会了吗
[09:46] No, but I wrote some jokes 没有 不过我写了些笑话
[09:47] in case someone got sick and they needed a backup. 以防有人病倒了需要替补人员
[09:49] Do you even know January Jones? Why would they call you? 你认识詹纽瑞·琼斯吗 他们为什么会找你去
[09:51] I don’t know, I guess I thought that 不知道啊 可能是因为我以为
[09:53] my agent could get me in the mix if Jason Sudeikis– 我的经纪人能让我混进去 如果杰森·苏戴奇斯
[09:57] How did these get out of order? 怎么顺序就变乱了呢
[09:58] So in the joke, are the globes your balls? 所以在这个笑话里 “球球”就是你的蛋蛋
[10:00] And they get warm when you see January Jones? 你一看到詹纽瑞·琼斯它们就变暖吗
[10:03] Is that how balls work? 蛋蛋是这样的吗
[10:04] I don’t know. It’s a work in progress. 我不知道 这仍是未解之谜
[10:06] Professional integrity! 找到职业诚信了
[10:08] “Our relationship “我们的关系
[10:08] no longer has any professional integrity. 不再有任何职业诚信
[10:10] So it’s gotta end. Stand to leave.” 因此必须中断 起身离开”
[10:13] Shouldn’t have read that part. 我不该把这段念出来的
[10:14] “When you reflect on this, “等你反应过来
[10:15] you’ll see it’s best for both of us. 就会发现这对我们双方都好
[10:17] Exit restaurant.” Goddamn it. 离开餐厅” 该死
[10:19] Wow, that was– I don’t know what that was. 那可真是…我都不知道那是什么
[10:22] Hey! Where are you going? 喂 你要去哪儿
[10:25] Who gave you this idea? Spanakopita? 是谁给你出的主意 是皮塔饼吗
[10:28] This has nothing to do with Ana. 这事和安娜没有任何关系
[10:29] Here you go, sir. 这是您的钥匙 先生
[10:31] – I’ll get it! – You two are b’thumping. -我去捡 -你们有一腿
[10:33] Now you do whatever she says? 所以现在你对她言听计从
[10:35] – Is that what’s happening? – No. -事情是这样对不对 -不对
[10:36] No, you’re not b’thumping or no, 你和她没一腿吗
[10:37] you’re not doing whatever she says? 你难道不是在对她言听计从吗
[10:39] I’m not doing whatever she says. 我没有对她言听计从
[10:40] So you are b’thumping. 那你和她就有一腿
[10:42] I understand from context what you mean, 我懂你什么意思
[10:43] but there’s no way b’thumping is a thing. 不过有没有一腿根本就无关紧要吧
[10:46] I’ll get it! 我去捡
[10:47] Hey you don’t have to do everything your little falafel pocket tells you to. 你不必对鹰嘴豆饼[希腊菜]言听计从
[10:50] – You screwed up! – Once! In 23 years! -你搞砸了 -23年来就这一次
[10:54] I’ll get ’em. 我去捡
[10:55] All these years I carried you, 这些年没人待见你的时候
[10:56] when no one wanted to work with you. 是我一直支持你
[10:58] I still managed to get you jobs. 想方设法帮你接到角色
[11:00] And then you would flake, or sabotage them, 然后你要么爽约 要么搞得一团糟
[11:02] or get wrapped up 要么陷入
[11:03] in some crisis or emergency or vague sadness. 某种危机 紧急状况 或莫名的忧伤之中
[11:06] Everyone told me to dump you– 所有人都让我别管你
[11:07] my bosses, film execs, directors, 我的老板 制作人 导演
[11:09] they all told me you were washed up, 他们都跟我说你已经扶不起来了
[11:11] a nobody, a has-been, a joke, 是个无名小卒 过气明星 演艺圈的笑柄
[11:13] too portly for TV. 脑满肠肥不上镜
[11:14] Too portly for TV? Who said that? 脑满肠肥不上镜 谁说的
[11:16] It doesn’t matter. 这不重要
[11:16] It does. Who said it? 很重要 谁说的
[11:17] Luis Guzman. 路易斯·古兹曼
[11:18] Luis Guzman. Luis Guzman said I’m too portly for TV? 路易斯·古兹曼 他好意思说我脑满肠肥不上镜
[11:22] You know what you’re right, BoJack. 知道吗 你说的对 波杰克
[11:23] This is for the best. 这样最好
[11:24] I no longer have to lug your talentless, 老娘再也不用背着你这块一无是处
[11:26] self-centered, self-sabotaging, 自私自利 自我毁灭
[11:27] dead-weight carcass of faded talent around my neck. 江郎才尽 死气沉沉的朽木行走天涯了
[11:30] – Hey. – Thank you for firing me. -注意点 -多谢你炒了我
[11:31] I’m gonna go pour myself 我要去给自己倒一小杯
[11:32] a little celebratory potato juice, 洋芋汁好好庆祝一下
[11:34] because this is the best goddamn thing 被你炒鱿鱼简直是老娘
[11:35] that’s ever happened to me. 人生中最大的幸事
[11:37] Hey! Hey! Hey! 等等 站住 回来
[11:44] I’ll get it. 我去捡
[11:45] You do not talk to me like that and walk away. 你不能羞辱我完之后就那么走了
[11:47] Oh, no? What’s happening? 不能吗 怎么回事
[11:49] This is so weird. I’m walking away, 真奇怪 我竟然走开了
[11:51] even though you told me not to. 即便你说不准
[11:52] Right, I don’t work for you anymore. 那又怎样 我已经不给你打工了
[11:54] – Hey! – Excuse me, Mr. Horseman? -回来 -打扰一下 马男先生
[11:57] – Not now. – We have a slight problem in the kitchen. -别来烦我 -厨房里出了一些小状况
[12:00] Where is everybody? 人都去哪了
[12:00] That’s the problem. They all quit. 问题就在这里 他们都辞职了
[12:02] The kitchen’s backed up with orders. 点的单都还没做呢
[12:03] No one’s getting food. 这样下去客人都没得吃了
[12:04] And the critic is growing very impatient. 评论家也越来越没耐心了
[12:07] Writing that down… 把这个记下来…
[12:10] – Just do what you normally do. – But there’s no chef. -按惯例行事就行了 -可没有主厨啊
[12:12] Well then, tonight’s your lucky night. You just got promoted. 那今晚就是你的幸运夜 你被升主厨了
[12:15] But I don’t want to be a chef. 可伦家不想当主厨啊
[12:16] I want to sing. 想唱就唱
[12:19] Kidding kidding. I’m actually just happy being a waiter. 开个玩笑 这个服务员我当得很开心
[12:21] I’m not my job. 工作不是我的全部
[12:22] A lot of people think that– 很多人认为…
[12:23] You’re the chef! Start cheffing! 你现在就是主厨 开始干事
[12:25] Oh. 怎么这样
[12:31] What? Fifty teeth? Get out of here. Let me see. 什么 50颗牙 不可能吧 我要看
[12:36] Would you look at that. 瞧瞧这一嘴牙
[12:37] You’re thrilled to have me out of your life huh? 能摆脱我你很开心吧
[12:39] Because I was such a burden all those years. 毕竟我这些年来给你造成这么大压力
[12:41] Can I close my mouth now? 我能闭上嘴了吗
[12:43] – Know what I think? – Don’t wanna hear it. -知道我怎么想吗 -没兴趣听
[12:45] I think you like being there to rescue me. 我觉得你喜欢扮圣母来拯救我
[12:46] – Hi hi, I close my mouth, okay? – Nobody cares! -这里这里 我闭嘴了哟 -随你便
[12:49] – Okay– – Nope, I’m still counting. -好的 -张着 我还在数
[12:51] You like it when I’m a mess. 你就喜欢看见我一团糟的样子
[12:53] Because it makes you feel good about yourself. 因为这样会让你觉得自己非常被需要
[12:55] Guess what? I never asked for that. 知道吗 我从来都不想要你的救赎
[12:57] You ask all the time. 你一直都需要
[12:58] You have never not been asking me to rescue you. 你没有一次不求我帮你
[13:01] “Princess Carolyn, help me! “卡洛琳公主 帮帮我
[13:03] I slept with the gaffer’s wife 我把灯光师的老婆睡了
[13:04] and now he’s not lighting me properly. 现在他都不好好给我打光了
[13:06] Princess Carolyn, 卡洛琳公主
[13:07] I threw up on Elle Fanning in a bounce house. 我在跳跳屋里吐在艾丽·范宁身上了
[13:10] Princess Carolyn, why am I such a big stupid asshole?” 卡洛琳公主 为什么我这么傻逼又混蛋呢”
[13:13] Okay, great, more abuse. Right on schedule. 很好 继续人身攻击 不出所料
[13:15] Oh, that’s abuse? 这也算人身攻击
[13:16] “BoJack, you’re such a big, stupid asshole. 波杰克 你就是个超级傻逼大混蛋
[13:18] BoJack, why were you even in the bounce house, dummy? 波杰克 你去跳跳屋做什么 笨蛋
[13:21] BoJack, you wasted my thirties!” 波杰克 你浪费了我30岁那10年
[13:24] I never said you wasted my thirties. 我从来没这么说过
[13:27] Didn’t have to, you’re always saying it. 不用明说 但言语间都透露着那个意思
[13:28] And I don’t like being around you, because I feel bad. 我不喜欢跟你在一起 那让我感觉很糟
[13:33] You make me feel bad. 你让我觉得很糟
[13:36] So this isn’t about me being a bad agent. 所以不是因为我是个不称职的经纪人
[13:39] It’s about a lot of things. 因为很多事情
[13:41] – Where are you going? – Away. -你去哪里 -离开
[13:43] Hey, listen, man. 听着 兄弟
[13:45] I don’t wanna get in the middle of this, 我不想介入其中
[13:46] – It’s none of my business. – No, boy. -这不关我的事 -没错
[13:47] – But I just have to say I love that sweater. – What? -但我只想说 我喜欢你的毛衣 -什么
[13:51] – Can you give it to me? – What? No. -能送我吗 -什么 不行
[13:52] I held my mouth open a really long time. 可我张了那么长时间的嘴
[13:55] What does that have to do–? 那个跟毛衣…
[13:55] I just feel like you’re not being fair, 我觉得你这样太不公平了
[13:57] to me or Princess Katniss. 无论是对我还是对凯特尼斯公主
[13:59] – Wait, who? – Your friend. -等等 谁 -你朋友
[14:00] You’ve forgotten her already? Typical BoSchwack. 你已经忘了她了吗 果然是波舒瓦克[怪胎]
[14:03] Alright, that’s enough out of you. 真是受够你了
[14:05] It’s all right, It’s all right. You’re gonna get through this. 没关系 没关系 你能搞定的
[14:07] You’re gonna get through this. 一定能撑过去
[14:08] Are you okay? 你还好吗
[14:09] Are you okay? You’ve been in there a long time. 你还好吗 你已经在里面很久了
[14:12] I left for a while and came back. 我出来了一会儿又回来了
[14:14] Just so you know, this wasn’t an easy decision. 我想让你知道 这是个艰难的决定
[14:17] – This is the ladies’ room! – What’s going on out there? -这里是女厕所 -外面发生什么了
[14:19] Are you watching a movie? 你在看电影吗
[14:21] I agonized over this. Ask Ana. 我很苦恼 就去问了安娜
[14:23] Oh. So you did talk about it with Ana. 看吧 你果然跟她商量过了
[14:25] Yeah. I respect her opinion. 是的 我尊重她的意见
[14:31] Paws not claws! Paws not claws! 别上爪子 别上爪子
[14:33] Hey! Ow! God, you’re strong. 苍天啊 你好强壮
[14:43] This is exactly the kind of unprofessionalism I’m talking about. 这就是我说的丧失专业精神
[14:47] You want to talk about professionalism? 你想跟我谈专业精神
[14:49] Yes, yes I do. 是的 没错
[14:54] But not here. 但不是在这里
[14:58] You say you want professionalism? Bullshit. 你说你想保持专业关系 简直屁话
[15:01] You want a mommy you can slide your dick in and out. 你想要的不过是个能给你暖屌的妈而已
[15:04] I can want that and also want professionalism. 我可以性事专业两不误
[15:06] A sex-mommy who keeps her boundaries 一个自律又能暖床的妈
[15:08] is that too much to ask? 我的要求过分吗
[15:09] Is there a single woman you’ve worked with 跟你合作过的女性之中
[15:11] who you haven’t tried to groggily thrust yourself into? 有哪个不是被你烂醉之后给上了的
[15:15] Oh my God. Is it any wonder I don’t want to be around you? 上帝啊 还觉得我想摆脱你让你很诧异吗
[15:17] All you do is tell me I’m a terrible person. 你一直乐此不疲地告诉我我有多渣
[15:20] Please, you’re such a self-pitying masochist, 得了吧 你这个自怨自艾的受虐狂
[15:23] I could say ten nice things and one mean thing, 我夸你十句 骂你一句
[15:25] you would only hear the one mean thing. 你总是只听到难听的那一句
[15:27] I’d love it if you said ten nice things to me. 你倒是说十句好听的来听听啊
[15:29] You don’t think I can? I can say nice things. 你以为我说不出来吗 我能说出来
[15:32] Ready when you are. 随时恭候
[15:32] Does self-pitying masochist count, 说我是自怨自艾的受虐狂那一句算吗
[15:34] or are we starting from scratch? 还是从头开始
[15:35] Okay, one– I’m freezing my whiskers off. 好 一 我的胡须都要冻掉了
[15:38] You have a natural charisma. 你有天生的魅力
[15:40] You hesitated, that means it’s a lie. 你犹豫了 说明你在说谎
[15:41] Two, you are loved by millions. 二 你受万千人宠爱
[15:43] That’s not a compliment. 这不算夸奖
[15:44] So is Kim Jong Un and Teri Hatcher. 金正恩和泰瑞·海切尔也是
[15:47] I got this. I got this. 我可以的 我可以的
[15:48] Pre-heat oven? Where’s the pre-heat button? 预热烤箱 预热的按键在哪
[15:50] Excuse me? Waiter? 打扰一下 服务员
[15:52] Where are my family’s double-fudge cheese pies? 我们家点的双份软糖奶酪派还没好吗
[15:54] I’m not your waiter anymore. I’m the chef. 我不是服务员了 我是主厨
[15:56] Then who’s our waiter? 那谁是服务员
[15:58] you’re the waiter now. Ta-da! 现在你就是服务员了 接住
[16:01] I can’t be a waiter. 我不能当服务员
[16:02] I have a very important business meeting tomorrow. 我明天要开一个很重要的商务会议
[16:04] You get someone else to do it. 会找别人去开
[16:06] I’m the chef and whatever I say goes! 现在我是主厨我说了算
[16:08] Okay. Who gets these soy balls and onion cubes? 好吧 大豆丸子加洋葱块是谁的
[16:10] Table eight. Deliver those soy balls, soldier. 八号桌 立刻送过去 士兵
[16:12] You got it, boss. 是 老板
[16:14] Number six. You know how to make me laugh. 第六条 你知道怎么逗我笑
[16:16] So I’m a clown to you? Like Joe Pesci in Home Alone? 我是你的小丑咯 像小鬼当家李的乔·佩西
[16:20] You recognize you’re being impossible, right? 你知道你有多不可理喻了吧
[16:22] I don’t know how you put up with me for so many years. 不知道这么多年你怎么能忍受了我
[16:23] I didn’t put up with you, BoJack. 我没在忍受 波杰克
[16:26] I liked being with you. And I don’t regret it. 我喜欢和你在一起 我不后悔
[16:30] I don’t regret the trip to the Bahamas. 我不后悔和你去巴哈马群岛
[16:32] Or the bracelet you bought me for my 38th birthday. 还有你在我38岁生日时送我的项链
[16:35] Or when my dad died 还有我爸去世时
[16:36] and you came to the funeral with me and held my hand. 你来参加葬礼 还握着我的手
[16:39] I’m doing this for both of us. You understand? 我这么做是为了我们两个 你懂吗
[16:42] Did you ever love me? At all? 你爱过我吗
[16:44] I don’t– I’m not– 我没有…我不会
[16:47] You know that I don’t do the whole love thing. 你知道我不搞恋爱那一套
[16:51] Either you end up hurting someone or they hurt you. 结局不是伤害别人就是被伤害
[16:53] So, what’s the point? 所以为什么要恋爱呢
[16:55] Yeah. 没错
[16:57] This sucks. 糟透了
[16:59] I did this to myself. I do this to myself. 都是我自作孽 一直在自作孽
[17:02] Why do I do this to myself? 我为什么要自作孽
[17:03] I don’t know. 我也不懂
[17:04] Maybe if you’re good at putting out fires, 也许你就擅长救火
[17:06] you just run from fire to fire 救完一个再救下一个
[17:08] and don’t really think about– 都没想…
[17:09] Oh, God, I don’t wanna be a chef! 上帝啊 我不想当主厨
[17:11] I want to be not on fire! 我不想引火上身
[17:13] We gotta put out that fire! 我们得赶紧救火
[17:15] I hate Mondays! 我讨厌周一
[17:18] I figured out how to pre-heat the oven. 我现在知道怎么预热烤箱了
[17:22] This night has been a disaster. 今晚简直是灾难
[17:24] The good news is 有个好消息
[17:25] I got my kid to prep my important meeting at work. 我让我的孩子们去准备重要会议了
[17:27] The bad news is all the customers went home. 坏消息是顾客们都走了
[17:30] They didn’t like the screaming 他们不喜欢听到尖叫声
[17:31] and felt like their food was a little too “on fire”. 还觉得他们的菜都有点”过火”
[17:34] It’s called a char, dumbshits. 这叫碳烤 笨蛋
[17:35] The critic’s still here. 美食评论家没走
[17:39] She still wants her mushroom risotto. 她还在等她的意式蘑菇炖饭
[17:43] I don’t know how to make risotto. 我不会做意式炖饭
[17:46] I know how. 我会
[17:47] What are you doing? No, go home. 你还在这干嘛 回家吧
[17:48] You’re right. What am I doing? 你说的对 我在这干嘛
[17:51] All right. 好吧
[17:55] Good luck. 祝你好运
[18:01] *Keep driving, keep driving* *往前开 往前开*
[18:03] *Girl, don’t turn that car around* *女孩你千万别回头*
[18:06] *Break your pattern of needing to fix other people* *别再一直当圣母*
[18:11] *Just keep on driving away* *开上车继续走*
[18:15] Who do they write these songs for? 这破歌是写给谁的
[18:18] *Don’t go back to the restaurant* *那间餐厅别再回*
[18:21] *This is Carolyn* *因为我是卡洛琳*
[18:23] *Keep driving away* *千万别回头*
[18:30] Goddamn it. 该死的
[18:31] How should I know? 我怎么知道
[18:32] Do I look like an expert in cooking oils? 你看我像烹饪用油专家吗
[18:34] We have to choose! We’re running out of time. 我们得选一个 没时间了
[18:37] – Olive. You wanna use olive oil. – What? -橄榄油 应该用橄榄油 -什么
[18:38] What are you doing? 你在这干嘛
[18:40] Let me do this. You’ll burn the place to the ground. 我来吧 你俩会把整间餐厅搞垮
[18:43] Fine. This isn’t one of those things 好吧 但这事情不算
[18:45] where you save my ass 你临危救场
[18:46] so I feel obligated to give you your job back. 好让我感觉必须雇你回来那一类
[18:48] Trust me. I know you have no sense of obligation to me. 相信我 我知道你对我没有任何义务
[18:52] Slam. I’m sorry, I’d rather not get involved. 打脸啦 抱歉 我不想牵扯进来
[18:55] Can I get you some more water? 需要为您加点水吗
[18:57] You look lovely. It’s a great blouse. 您穿得好美 这衬衫非常漂亮
[18:59] Mom, I wanna go home. 妈 我想回家
[19:02] This is a very important night for the restaurant. 今晚对这家餐厅非常重要
[19:04] How are we coming on the sales meeting? 销售会议的事办得怎么样了
[19:05] Did you get the big conference room? 订到大会议室了吗
[19:07] Winslow wants the big conference room 温斯洛要用大会议室
[19:09] for his presentation to corporate. 给公司的人做汇报
[19:11] You get back on that phone and you get me that big room. 接着打电话 把会议室给我搞定
[19:14] Okay, Mom. 好吧 妈妈
[19:17] The secret is stirring continuously. 秘诀在于要一直搅拌
[19:19] Right, so that’s the secret. 原来如此
[19:22] I’m gonna go roll some more soy balls. 我去再滚点大豆丸子了
[19:26] – Thanks for your help. – Sure. -谢谢你帮我 -不客气
[19:29] How do you know how to do this? 你怎么会做这个
[19:30] Mom was a live-in maid for a rich family. 我妈以前是大户人家的住家女佣
[19:32] She had a little trouble bending her elbow too much. 她想经常弯曲手肘有点困难
[19:34] Glug, glug. 一杯接一杯
[19:35] So unless I wanted us to be on the street, 所以为了不流落街头
[19:37] I had to cover for her, a lot. 我只能整天帮她擦屁股
[19:40] That rich family loved Italian food 那家人超爱吃意大利菜
[19:42] and champagne fountains. And cocaine. And private jets. 还有香槟喷泉 可卡因和私人飞机
[19:45] And screaming at each other. 还有冲彼此大吼
[19:47] “Who threw my cocaine in the champagne fountain?” “谁把我的可卡因扔进香槟喷泉里了”
[19:49] – So standard rich people stuff? – I guess. -富人们都这样吧 -估计是
[19:53] – How come you never told me that? – I did. -你怎么没跟我说过这些 -我说过
[19:56] It’s okay. I know you never remember anything. 没关系 我知道你不记事
[19:59] That’s not true. I remember the first time we met. 不是这样的 我记得我们第一次相见
[20:02] I went to see Marv. 我去找马弗
[20:03] You were at the desk in front of his office. 你坐在他办公室前的桌子那
[20:05] I thought you were cute and you said, 我觉得你很可爱 你说
[20:06] “It’s good to see you again.” “很高兴再见到你”
[20:09] Oh. So I guess we’d met before. 那我们之前已经见过了
[20:11] That was the third time we met. 那其实是我们第三次见面了
[20:13] The first time was when I was an intern. 我们第一次见面时我还是实习生
[20:15] I delivered a script to your house. 我去送剧本到你家
[20:18] You were passed out in the yard, 当时你在院子里晕过去了
[20:19] covered in tapioca pudding. 满身都是木薯布丁
[20:21] I hosed you down, dragged you inside, 我拿水管给你冲了冲 把你拖进了屋里
[20:22] covered you with a blanket. 然后用毯子把你盖上了
[20:24] – Really? I don’t remember that. – Shocker. -是吗 我不记得了 -好震惊
[20:26] So you’ve gone from daughter of a maid 所以说 你从一个女佣的女儿
[20:28] to head of your own company. 到拥有了自己的公司
[20:30] Well, the company’s not doing so hot. 我的公司情况不怎么好
[20:32] Don’t try to guilt me. 不要让我愧疚
[20:33] It’s not your fault. 这不怪你
[20:34] Turns out being an agent and running an agency 事实证明 当经纪人和经营经纪公司
[20:36] are two different skills. 是截然不同的
[20:38] It’s like asking a really delicious tomato 这就好比让一个美味的番茄
[20:40] to make you a tomato sandwich. 给你做一个番茄三明治
[20:41] How’s a tomato gonna make you a sandwich? 一个番茄怎么会做三明治
[20:43] He’s got no arms. 他没有胳膊
[20:44] You’ll figure it out. 你会想到办法的
[20:45] Princess Carolyn always lands on her feet. 卡洛琳公主总能重振雄风
[20:47] But I don’t even know why I’m doing it. 但我都不知道我为什么当经纪人
[20:49] Does any of it matter? 当经纪人什么的重要吗
[20:51] Why are you an agent at all if it makes you so miserable? 如果当经纪人让你这么痛苦 那你为什么还当
[20:54] Because I’m good at it. 因为我很擅长
[20:55] I mean, stuff hasn’t been hitting lately. 虽然最近情况不好
[20:57] But, usually, I’m really good at it. 但通常我都做得很好
[20:59] Just ’cause you’re good at something 有一些事 你擅长做
[21:00] doesn’t mean you have to do it. 不意味着你必须去做
[21:01] I’m good at driving sober, 我擅长清醒时开车
[21:02] but I don’t relish the opportunity. 但我并不珍惜这种机会
[21:05] But what else would I do? Who else would I be? 但除此之外我干什么呢 我还会成为谁
[21:10] I do love you, by the way. 对了 我是爱你的
[21:12] I mean, as much as I’m capable of loving anyone. 在我能爱一个人的能力范围内爱你
[21:15] Which is never enough. I’m sorry. 但这从来都不够爱 对不起
[21:23] Ta-da! 好了
[21:28] Well, it is truly… 这真的…
[21:33] how should I put this? Wonderful. 怎么说呢 美味
[21:38] So you’ll give Elefante a good review? 那你要给尚象餐厅好评吗
[21:39] Oh, no, I can’t do that. 不 这可不行
[21:42] I waited over two hours to be served. 我等了两小时才等到菜
[21:44] The ambience was terrible. 餐厅环境糟糕
[21:46] You two were screaming all night. 你们俩整晚都在大喊大叫
[21:48] At one point, 刚才的时候
[21:49] a waiter ran through the restaurant on fire. 一个服务生还着火跑过了餐厅
[21:51] Unfortunately, you will be receiving my lowest rating: 很不幸 我要给你们打最低分
[21:55] four hundred and twelve stars, 412颗星
[21:57] out of a possible a billion. 满分十亿颗
[21:59] A billion stars? 十亿颗星
[22:00] Yes, that’s the rubric I use 对 我在汤博乐的
[22:01] on SamanthaGoesToRestaurants.Tumblr.Com. 萨曼莎评餐厅网上都是这么评的
[22:04] Oh, God, get out. 天啊 你快走吧
[22:05] I assure you the animated GIFs 我保证会用GIF动图
[22:09] with which I describe this encounter shall be scathing. 记录这次评价经历并严厉批评你们
[22:13] Mom! I just touched base with Rooney, re: Winslow. 妈妈 我刚跟鲁尼·回:温斯洛沟通了
[22:16] He’s out, we’re in. 他走 我们用
[22:18] The conference room is ours. 会议室是我们的了
[22:20] Perfect! This is the meeting 完美 我们要在这个会议上
[22:21] where we finally convince the big boys 终于说服那些大人物
[22:23] to let us get babies addicted to vaping! 允许我们让孩子对电子烟上瘾了
[22:25] Yes! Corporation! 太棒了 公司万岁
[22:33] – How about a drink? – I could drink. -要喝一杯吗 -没问题
[22:35] I don’t think I can. I’m heading out. 我喝不了 我要出去
[22:37] I got pretty badly burnt earlier and I’m sitll in a lot of pain. 我之前烧伤严重 现在还很疼
[22:39] I should probably go to the ER. 我可能应该去急救室
[22:41] Have a great night. 夜晚愉快
[22:48] What’s the second time we met? 我们第二次见面是什么时候
[22:50] – I went to a taping of Horsin’ Around. – Which episode? -《胡闹的小马》录音的时候 -哪一集
[22:54] It was the one where Olivia 奥利维亚在洗衣机里
[22:55] put too much detergent in the washing machine. 放了太多洗衣粉那集
[22:57] Nancy Reagan was the guest star. 那集前第一夫人南茜雷根是客串嘉宾
[22:59] I tell you, that woman was the real actor in the family. 讲真 那个女人才是家里真正的演员
[23:01] I just started working for Marv. 当时我刚开始在马弗手下工作
[23:03] I went backstage to introduce myself. 所以我去后台向你自我介绍了
[23:06] And then what happened? 然后呢
[23:07] You told me 你告诉我
[23:08] you were too tired pretending to be nice all night, 你整晚都在假装好人太累了
[23:10] and I needed to leave you alone. 所以让我不要去烦你
[23:12] I’m a real jerk? 我真是混蛋啊
[23:14] Yeah, but you’re honest, straightforward. 对 但你很诚实很直接
[23:17] You’re not fake nice and you don’t beat around the bush. 你不假装友好 你不拐弯抹角
[23:19] Your heart is tender, so you protect it from people, 你有颗善良的心 所以才保护起来了
[23:22] but sometimes you open up a wall and it’s incredible. 但有时候你会打开一堵墙 那会真的让人惊异
[23:26] You’re doing the best you can, 你已经尽力做到最好了
[23:27] considering your asshole parents. 毕竟你父母是一对混蛋
[23:29] You have great taste in art, 你的艺术品位很好
[23:31] and that pink spot on your nose is just adorable. 你鼻子上的粉色点点很萌
[23:34] How many nice things was that, about ten? 我夸了你多少句了 到十句了吧
[23:36] – Yeah, just about. – Okay, one more. -到了 -还有一点
[23:38] You let me help you tonight because you knew I needed it. 你今晚让我帮你是因为你知道我需要这样
[23:41] You did it for me, which was very sweet. 你是为了我才让我帮忙 你真好
[23:45] Thanks. You’re a good friend to me. 谢谢 你是我的好朋友
[23:48] – BoJack… – Yeah? -波杰克 -怎么
[23:50] Are we friends? 我们是朋友吗
[23:52] Yeah. I mean, I think we are. 是啊 我觉得我们是
[23:54] Or I think we can be. 或者我们可以做朋友
[23:56] Okay, then as a friend, I’m asking you… 好 那作为朋友 我请求你
[24:00] Please don’t leave me. 求你不要离开我
[24:01] – Princess Carolyn– – Please. -卡洛琳公主 -求你
[24:03] I can turn this around, I just need more time. 我可以扭转乾坤 我只是需要更多时间
[24:06] We’re in a fragile period, still finding our feet. 我们目前处在脆弱期 还在努力站稳脚跟
[24:08] Just give me six months and then you can go. 给我半年时间 还不成功你就可以走了
[24:11] I promise, I’ll never ask anything from you again, 我保证 以后我再也不让你去做什么了
[24:14] but please, give me six months. 但是求你再给我半年时间
[24:17] Sorry, I left my coat here. 抱歉 我忘记拿外套了
[24:26] I got it. 拿到了
[24:33] So? What do you think? 怎么样 可以吗
[24:37] No. 不行
[24:38] *Back in the ’90s* *九十年代时*
[24:40] *I was in a very famous TV show* *我参演了一部著名电视剧*
[24:47] *I’m BoJack the Horseman* *我是马男波杰克*
[24:49] *BoJack the horse* *那匹马波杰克的行为*
[24:51] *don’t act like you don’t know* *大家了如指掌*
[24:57] *And I’m trying to hold onto my past* *我想沉迷过去*
[25:01] *It’s been so long. I don’t think I’m gonna last* *都过了这么久 我想我不会长久了*
[25:06] *I guess I’ll just try and make you understand* *我应该会努力让你明白*
[25:09] *That I’m more horse than a man* *比起人我更像马*
[25:14] *Or I’m more man than a horse… BoJack!* *还是比起马我更像人 波杰克*
马男波杰克

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