| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:13] | 丑陋的虫虫事实 除虫害公司 | |
| [00:22] | Did someone switch Tina to white noise? | 有人把蒂娜调到白噪音模式了吗 |
| [00:24] | Tina, sweetie, why are you making your sad mumble grumbles? | 亲爱的蒂娜 为什么要发出难过的咕哝声 |
| [00:27] | I’m just nervous about the oral report | 我好紧张 今天我要在课上 |
| [00:29] | I have to give in class today. | 做口头报告 |
| [00:31] | For Wagstaff 75th Anniversary Week. | 这周是瓦格斯塔夫小学75周年校庆周 |
| [00:33] | Ooh, right! | 对哦 |
| [00:34] | The 75th anniversary thing. | 75周年校庆 |
| [00:36] | That school’s getting up there, huh? | 学校办得还挺像样 |
| [00:38] | Yeah, it looks much younger, | 是啊 看上去更年轻了 |
| [00:39] | but it had a lot of work done. | 但其实是背地里动了手脚 |
| [00:40] | Boob job. | 隆胸什么的 |
| [00:41] | Our class had to make posters | 为了校庆大会 |
| [00:43] | for the anniversary assembly. | 我们班要做海报 |
| [00:44] | Also, breaking news– | 另外 重大新闻 |
| [00:45] | fourth graders don’t know how to spell “Anniversary.” | 四年级学生还不会写”校庆” |
| [00:48] | Well, Tina, I’m sure you’ll do great, | 蒂娜 我相信你可以的 |
| [00:49] | even though sometimes you get | 尽管对公开演讲的恐惧 |
| [00:50] | a debilitating fear of public speaking. | 有时会让你发挥失常 |
| [00:52] | Sorry, pretend I didn’t say that last part. | 抱歉 最后那句当我没说 |
| [00:54] | It’s not just that. | 不只是那样 |
| [00:55] | This is a speech with a partner. | 这次是搭档演讲 |
| [00:56] | Zeke and I are doing a report together. | 我要和齐克一起作报告 |
| [00:58] | Wait. Why is having a partner bad? | 等等 有搭档不是很好吗 |
| [01:01] | I kind of have a reputation | 在搭档演讲这件事上 |
| [01:02] | when it comes to doing oral reports with partners. | 我的名声可能不算太好 |
| [01:05] | They call her “The cooler.” | 她的绰号是”冰盒” |
| [01:06] | She’ll take your perfectly good oral presentation | 她会让原本进行得很好的口头报告 |
| [01:08] | and throw a bunch of cold sweat on it. | 淹没在她的冷汗里 |
| [01:10] | They also call her the cooler | 还有另一个原因 |
| [01:11] | because you can sit on her at the beach. | 在海滩别人可以坐她身上 |
| [01:13] | I just don’t want to let my partner down, | 我就是不想让搭档失望 |
| [01:14] | so I get all nervous and sweaty | 结果就变得超紧张 |
| [01:16] | and I mess up my note cards and… | 然后就会弄乱手卡 然后… |
| [01:18] | …my mouth gets all phlegmy, | 嘴里就有很多痰 |
| [01:19] | like right now, ’cause I’m thinking about it. | 就像现在这样 我一想这件事就会这样 |
| [01:22] | Okay, calm down. | 好了 冷静 |
| [01:23] | You know, maybe just picture everyone with a giant booger | 你可以想象每个人都有块大鼻屎 |
| [01:25] | that’s trapped in their nose hairs | 跟鼻毛缠成一团 |
| [01:27] | and they look ridiculous. Speaking of… | 看起来滑稽极了 说到这个 |
| [01:29] | Bob. Nose hairs. | 鲍勃 你的鼻毛 |
| [01:31] | Well, I gotta go. | 我得走了 |
| [01:32] | Not because I had a booger in my nose. | 不是因为我鼻子里有鼻屎 |
| [01:34] | I’m gonna go to the Tuesday farmers market | 周二沼泽港有农贸集市 |
| [01:36] | in Bog Harbor for produce. | 我去买食材 |
| [01:37] | That’s what Dad says when he goes to his mistress. | 老爸去找情妇的时候就会这么说 |
| [01:39] | Tina, I’m sorry about the sweat stuff. | 蒂娜 出汗的事 抱歉 |
| [01:41] | Y-You get that from me. | 你遗传了我 |
| [01:42] | Sometimes I put rolled up socks under my arms. | 我有时会把袜子卷起来放在腋下 |
| [01:45] | No wonder this guy’s got a mistress. | 难怪这男人能找到情妇 |
| [01:48] | Hey, partner! | 搭档你好 |
| [01:49] | I’m real excited about our report today. | 我很期待今天的报告 |
| [01:51] | Hey, Zeke. Yup! | 是啊 齐克 |
| [01:53] | I mean, I’m not nervous or anything. I-I feel great. | 我可没紧张什么的 感觉好极了 |
| [01:55] | Tell that to your pits. | 这话跟你的腋窝说去吧 |
| [01:57] | Anyone have an extra pair of socks I can borrow? | 哪位有多余的袜子可以借我吗 |
| [01:58] | For… no reason? | 没什么原因 |
| [01:59] | I have extra socks, | 我有多的袜子 |
| [02:01] | but I’m wearing them over my other socks. | 但被我穿在了其它袜子外面 |
| [02:03] | Why do you have all those clothes on? | 你们为什么穿了这么多层衣服 |
| [02:05] | Jocelyn and I are doing our Wagstaff Anniversary report | 我和乔丝玲要一起做校庆报告 |
| [02:07] | on what popular people wore, past and present. | 主题是受欢迎的人在不同时代都穿什么 |
| [02:10] | We’re gonna take off layers to reveal popular people clothes | 我们会一层层脱掉衣服来展示 |
| [02:13] | from different decades. Yes, you’re jealous. | 各个时期的潮人服饰 你们嫉妒了 |
| [02:15] | Who’s jealous? Oh, them. | 谁嫉妒 是他们 |
| [02:18] | See ya later, Tina! | 回见 蒂娜 |
| [02:19] | We got this, right? | 我们能行的 对吧 |
| [02:20] | Yeah, totally, thumbs up! | 当然 给我们点赞 |
| [02:21] | Oh, God. | 老天 |
| [02:24] | Tina. Are you okay? | 蒂娜 你还好吗 |
| [02:25] | Yeah, really great. | 好极了 |
| [02:27] | Okay, I think I know what’s going on. | 好吧 我知道是怎么回事了 |
| [02:29] | Let’s go to my office. | 去我办公室吧 |
| [02:30] | This seems like a situation for the Anxiety Society. | 看起来是焦虑互助社发挥作用的时候了 |
| [02:33] | So, Panicky Paul, Nervous Nellie, | 这三位是惊慌保罗 紧张内莉 |
| [02:36] | and Worry Murray have all experienced | 以及担忧默里 他们都经历过 |
| [02:38] | what you’re experiencing. Isn’t that nice? | 你正在经历的状况 很棒吧 |
| [02:40] | It’s just– I have to give an oral report with Zeke… | 我要跟齐克一起做口头报告 |
| [02:45] | I just got a text. | 我的短信来了 |
| [02:46] | Oh, my God, it’s from Cassie. | 我的天 是卡茜 |
| [02:47] | She’s a person I’m dating. | 我的约会对象 |
| [02:49] | Twice. We went on two dates. | 两次 我们已经约会两次了 |
| [02:51] | Okay… | 好吧 |
| [02:52] | Cassie had a nice time last night. | 卡茜昨晚很开心 |
| [02:54] | What do I write back? | 我该怎么回复 |
| [02:55] | Maybe… say you had a nice time, too? | 或许…可以说你也很开心 |
| [02:58] | Ooh, that’s good! | 很不错 |
| [03:00] | Okay, Tina, back to you. | 好的蒂娜 说回你的事情 |
| [03:01] | Did the dolls work, or… what are we doing? | 玩偶有帮助吗 还是怎么样 |
| [03:04] | A little? | 有点用 |
| [03:05] | See this crystal? | 看见这块水晶了吗 |
| [03:06] | Cassie gave it to me. | 卡茜送我的 |
| [03:07] | That’s… nice. | 那还…挺不错 |
| [03:08] | She says it brings good energy | 她说水晶能给携带者 |
| [03:10] | to whoever is in possession of it. | 带来正能量 |
| [03:11] | I-I think that’s how she put it. | 她应该是怎么说的 |
| [03:13] | Are you saying maybe it could help me? | 你是说这也许能帮到我吗 |
| [03:15] | What? Oh, because of your thing? | 什么 你的那件事吗 |
| [03:17] | With the nervousness? Maybe. | 缓解你的紧张吗 也许吧 |
| [03:18] | I mean, Cassie’s so pretty. | 卡茜这么漂亮 |
| [03:20] | And her car was so clean. | 车又那么干净 |
| [03:21] | So, maybe she’s right… about crystals. | 她也许是对的 关于水晶的事 |
| [03:23] | So, yeah, go ahead and borrow it. | 拿去吧 这个借给你 |
| [03:25] | Okay. I mean, I guess it can’t hurt. | 好 反正也没坏处 |
| [03:27] | Unless it’s sharp. | 除非它很锋利 |
| [03:28] | That part’s a little sharp. Thanks, Mr. Frond. | 这边有点锋利 谢谢 福旺德老师 |
| [03:30] | Wait, wait, wait, wait. How does this look? | 等等 这个回复如何 |
| [03:32] | Maybe just one full line | 两行感叹号 |
| [03:33] | of exclamation points instead of two? | 换成一行会不会好一点 |
| [03:34] | But then how will she know I’m excited? | 那她怎么知道我很兴奋 |
| [03:37] | He’s back! | 他回来了 |
| [03:38] | Oh, thank God. I was worried about you. | 谢天谢地 我很担心你 |
| [03:41] | Why? I was just at the farmers market. | 为什么 我就去了趟农贸市场 |
| [03:43] | Yeah, but you know how farmers get. | 我知道 但农民一旦拿起草叉 |
| [03:44] | With their pitchforks. | 可怕的很 |
| [03:46] | Whoa, that’s a big box of fruits and veggies. | 你买了好大一箱水果和蔬菜 |
| [03:48] | Yeah, and I got a huge discount on all this, too. | 对 都是很便宜买的 |
| [03:50] | Look at this carrot. It’s got legs. | 瞧瞧这个胡萝卜 它有两条腿 |
| [03:52] | We could put a little pair of pants on it. | 都可以给它穿条小裤子了 |
| [03:54] | And this tomato’s all lumpy. | 这番茄坑奇形怪状的 |
| [03:55] | Wait a minute, all this stuff in here is weird-looking. | 等等 这里面的东西都长得很奇怪 |
| [03:57] | Yeah, that’s why it was so cheap. | 是的 所以才这么便宜 |
| [03:59] | Also, it’s all about to go rotten. | 而且 它们都快坏了 |
| [04:02] | Yum. | 真不错 |
| [04:02] | People get so judgmental about how food looks. | 人们对食物的长相太苛刻了 |
| [04:05] | I mean, ugly, soft, discolored food is food, too. | 丑的 软的 变色的食物也依然是食物 |
| [04:08] | No, it’s not. Sorry. | 它们算不上食物 抱歉 |
| [04:09] | I’m proud of you, Bobby. You saved all this food. | 我为你骄傲 鲍鲍 你拯救了这些食物 |
| [04:12] | Yeah. I mean, nobody at the farmers market | 是的 虽然农贸市场没人真的 |
| [04:14] | said the word “Hero,” | 用到”英雄”这个词 |
| [04:15] | but I think they were thinking it. | 但我觉得他们内心是这么看我的 |
| [04:17] | Hey, Linda, can you turn the tomato that way? | 琳达 你能把番茄翻个面吗 |
| [04:19] | So it’s not looking right at me | 我不想它一直用奇怪的眼睛 |
| [04:20] | with its weird tomato eyes? | 盯着我 |
| [04:22] | Okay, but the other side’s worse. | 好 不过另一面更糟 |
| [04:24] | And here comes Mr. Carrot. | 这位是胡萝卜先生 |
| [04:26] | I’m coming to say hi to you, Teddy. | 我来跟你打个招呼 泰迪 |
| [04:28] | I don’t like it! I don’t like it! | 我不喜欢 我不喜欢 |
| [04:30] | …and in the ’90s, | 在20世纪90年代 |
| [04:32] | popular people at Wagstaff wore baby doll dresses | 瓦格斯塔夫小学的红人穿的是洋娃娃裙 |
| [04:35] | like Wynona Ryder did in Reality Bites, | 就像薇诺娜·瑞德在《现实的创痛》里那样 |
| [04:37] | which is my dad’s favorite movie | 那是我爸最喜欢的电影 |
| [04:38] | and also the password for his laptop. | 也是他笔记本电脑的密码 |
| [04:41] | And these are lace-up jeans from the 2000s. | 这是21世纪的系带牛仔裤 |
| [04:43] | It’s like your pants are shoes. | 裤子就像鞋子一样 |
| [04:45] | And these are our clothes. | 这是我们的衣服 |
| [04:46] | Because we’re great. So, yeah, the end. | 因为我们也很”红” 我们报告完了 |
| [04:48] | Thank you, Tammy and Jocelyn. | 谢谢苔米和乔丝玲 |
| [04:50] | That was… an example of what happens | 这就是…我没审核 |
| [04:52] | when I don’t vet your report topics. | 你们报告主题的结果 |
| [04:54] | Okay! Tina, Zeke, let’s hear your report | 好了 蒂娜 齐克 让我们听听你们 |
| [04:57] | on Wagstaff’s Amazing Alumni. | 关于瓦格斯塔夫小学杰出校友的报告 |
| [04:58] | You ready? | 走吧 |
| [05:02] | Okay, let me know when you’re, | 你那口气吸完 |
| [05:03] | at the end of that deep breath and we’ll start. | 请告诉我下 我再开始 |
| [05:06] | Ready. | 好了 |
| [05:06] | Hey, Tina, when you look back | 蒂娜 当你回顾 |
| [05:08] | at 75 years of Wagstaff, what do you see? | 瓦格斯塔夫小学这75年 你看到了什么 |
| [05:11] | What do I see? | 我看到了什么 |
| [05:12] | I Spy Amazing Alumni! | 我看见了杰出校友 |
| [05:14] | – Nice. – Thanks. | -不错 -谢谢 |
| [05:15] | Hey, you know what, Zeke? | 不如这样 齐克 |
| [05:16] | Let’s talk about those amazing alumni. | 我们来聊聊那些杰出的校友 |
| [05:18] | Alumn-I’d love to! | 非常乐意 |
| [05:20] | We’re killing it. | 我们绝了 |
| [05:21] | Tina, you knocked it out of the park. | 蒂娜 你表现得太棒了 |
| [05:23] | Yeah, you didn’t get all sweaty like you usually do. | 是的 你没像往常一样全身冒汗 |
| [05:25] | It’s true. The report went pretty smoothly. | 真的 报告进行得很顺利 |
| [05:27] | And this thing only stabbed me once. | 而且这东西只戳到了我一次 |
| [05:29] | Is that a diamond? | 这是钻石吗 |
| [05:30] | Did you steal that from a scepter? | 你从权杖上偷来的吗 |
| [05:31] | Oh. No, it’s a crystal. | 不是 这是水晶 |
| [05:33] | Mr. Frond let me borrow it | 福旺德老师借给我的 |
| [05:34] | ’cause I was nervous about our report. | 因为我对报告的事很紧张 |
| [05:35] | The woman he’s dating gave it to him. | 这是他的约会对象给他的 |
| [05:37] | She said it brings good energy. | 她说能带来正能量 |
| [05:38] | – Good energy like a protein bar? – No. | -像蛋白棒那样的能量吗 -不是 |
| [05:41] | Tina, Zeke, I’m supposed to select | 蒂娜 齐克 我要选几组 |
| [05:43] | some of the oral reports to be given again tomorrow | 口头报告 明天在瓦格斯塔夫小学 |
| [05:46] | at the Wagstaff Anniversary assembly | 校庆大会上再展示一次 |
| [05:47] | and I’m choosing you guys. | 我打算选你们 |
| [05:49] | – Oh, my God! – Do what? | -天啊 -什么 |
| [05:50] | Yep. And Tammy, Jocelyn, | 对 苔米 乔丝玲 |
| [05:52] | since you two were the only other people | 除蒂娜他们以外 |
| [05:54] | who didn’t just read from | 你俩是唯一没有照读 |
| [05:55] | the school website’s “About us” section, | 学校官网简介的组合 |
| [05:57] | you will also be presenting your report at the assembly. | 因此你们也可以在校庆大会上作报告 |
| [06:00] | – Wow. – Ew. I mean, yay! | -哇 -恶心 我是说好耶 |
| [06:02] | What do you say, Tina? | 你怎么想 蒂娜 |
| [06:03] | You up for doing this again tomorrow? | 有信心明天再报告一次吗 |
| [06:04] | You can do it if I’m with you, Tina. | 有我在 你可以的 蒂娜 |
| [06:06] | Also, it might feel cool | 另外 如果你现在 |
| [06:07] | if you press me to your face right now. | 把我贴在脸上 会感觉凉凉的哦 |
| [06:09] | Or do it later, maybe. People might not get it. | 还是待会儿吧 别人会觉得奇怪的 |
| [06:11] | Here’s an oral report, Zeke– Let’s do it! | 我给你个口头报告 齐克 我们做吧 |
| [06:13] | That’s not really a report, but yeah! | 这算不上报告 不过太好了 |
| [06:19] | Tina, I’m so proud of you! | 蒂娜 我真为你骄傲 |
| [06:21] | My little lordy lordy, look who’s doing her report-y | 我的小宝贝要当着全校师生的面 |
| [06:23] | in front of the whole school! | 作报告呢 |
| [06:25] | Yeah, you went from scaredy-cat to She’s All That. | 是啊 胆小鬼瞬间变身《窈窕美眉》 |
| [06:27] | So, Tina, | 蒂娜 |
| [06:28] | you think a crystal made you do well on your report? | 你觉得是水晶让你在报告中表现出色吗 |
| [06:31] | I mean, I don’t know if I like your tone. | 我不太喜欢你说这话的语气 |
| [06:33] | But yes. Maybe. I’m not sure. | 不过是的 也许吧 我也不确定 |
| [06:36] | I’m just saying, it could be that you practiced a lot. | 我就想说 也可能是因为你练习了很多次 |
| [06:38] | Like, over and over. | 很多很多次 |
| [06:39] | Like, a few times, I thought you were talking to me, | 有几次 我还以为你在和我说话 |
| [06:41] | ’cause you were staring right at me | 因为你直勾勾地盯着我 |
| [06:42] | and I said “What, Tina?” | 我说 “什么 蒂娜” |
| [06:43] | And you just kept talking about alumni. | 而你只是继续说校友的事 |
| [06:46] | Look. All I can say is before I got this crystal, | 我只能说 没有水晶之前 |
| [06:47] | I was the cooler, and then yesterday I wasn’t. | 我是冰盒 但昨天我不是 |
| [06:50] | I was the… furnace. | 我成了… 火炉 |
| [06:51] | – The Her-nace. – Mom, is this dinner? | -“蒂”炉 -妈妈 这是晚餐吗 |
| [06:54] | It’s, like, all vegetables | 怎么全是蔬菜 |
| [06:55] | and I don’t have enough places to hide them. | 我都没地方藏了 |
| [06:57] | Well, your dad bought a giant box of weird produce | 你爸买了一大箱 |
| [06:59] | for the restaurant and there’s no way | 奇形怪状的食材回来 |
| [07:01] | we’re gonna be able to use it all down there, | 餐厅根本用不完 |
| [07:02] | so I brought some up here. | 我就拿了一些上来 |
| [07:03] | And this is our life now. | 咱家现在就这么吃了 |
| [07:05] | I smell a reality show. | 我嗅到了真人秀的味道 |
| [07:07] | Hey, you kids want to take these apples to school? | 要不带些苹果去学校 |
| [07:09] | Give ’em to your teachers? | 分给老师一些 |
| [07:11] | Are you sure that’s an apple? | 你确定那是苹果吗 |
| [07:12] | It’s fine. It’s natural. | 没问题 天然的 |
| [07:14] | That’s how apples look sometimes. | 苹果有时就长这样 |
| [07:16] | It kinda looks like Dad’s butt. | 和爸爸的屁股有点像 |
| [07:17] | – But not as red. – Oh, yeah. It does. | -只是没那么红 -是啊 确实像 |
| [07:21] | Hey, Mr. Frond. So… | 福旺德老师… |
| [07:22] | about this crystal you loaned me… | 你借给我的水晶 |
| [07:25] | is it okay if I keep it for the assembly today? | 我可以今天校庆大会之后再还你吗 |
| [07:27] | Yeah, sure. | 没问题 |
| [07:28] | Big things are happening, Tina. | 有大事要发生了 蒂娜 |
| [07:30] | I’m asking Cassie out on a third date. | 我打算第三次约卡茜出来 |
| [07:32] | What do you think of this? | 你觉得这个邀请如何 |
| [07:33] | “Want to come over for dinner tonight? | “今晚要过来吃晚餐吗 |
| [07:35] | “I make a mean casserole. | “我做个简单的砂锅 |
| [07:36] | “Or in your case, a Cassie-role. | “可以称之为卡茜锅 |
| [07:38] | “LOL. I told you I can be funny sometimes. | “哈哈哈 我说过我可以很幽默的 |
| [07:41] | Anyway, this is Phillip Frond.” | “总之 我是菲利普·福旺德” |
| [07:44] | Perfect? | 完美 |
| [07:44] | Great. Adding a heart, heart, heart, heart, | 好极了 加一颗心 心 心 心 |
| [07:47] | heart and send. | 心 发送 |
| [07:49] | You got this, Zeke. | 你没问题 齐克 |
| [07:50] | There’s my partner! | 我的搭档来了 |
| [07:51] | – Don’t talk! – What are you guys doing? | -别说话 -你们在干嘛 |
| [07:53] | Zeke is trying to break his record | 齐克在破他自己的纪录 |
| [07:55] | for how long he can hold up a pencil with his lip. | 看他用嘴唇能停住铅笔多久 |
| [07:58] | You know, I never think school’s gonna be interesting | 每当我觉得学校无聊透了的时候 |
| [08:00] | and then something like this happens. | 就总能撞见这种事 |
| [08:01] | Oh, my gosh, Zeke, three more seconds. | 天啊 齐克 还有三秒 |
| [08:03] | Two. One. | 二 一 |
| [08:04] | New record! | 新纪录 |
| [08:05] | I’m the holding up a pencil with my lip champ! | 我是嘴吸铅笔冠军 |
| [08:08] | I think you can quit school now. | 我觉得你现在可以退学了 |
| [08:09] | Hey! I bet it was because Tina was here. | 我猜是因为蒂娜在这 |
| [08:12] | – With the crystal. – Oh, yeah. | -带着水晶 -对 |
| [08:13] | Hey, Tina, can I borrow the crystal for PE today? | 蒂娜 我能借这个水晶上今天的体育课吗 |
| [08:15] | We’re running hurdles and I want to clear all of them. | 我们要跨栏 我需要跨过所有的栏 |
| [08:17] | So I don’t hit my penis like last time. | 不想又像上次那样撞到鸡鸡 |
| [08:20] | No. Mr. Frond trusted me with it | 不行 福旺德老师信任我 |
| [08:22] | and I don’t think I should lend it out. | 我觉得我不应该借出去 |
| [08:24] | Hey, I wasn’t holding the crystal | 我破嘴吸铅笔的纪录时 |
| [08:25] | when I broke my lip pencil record. | 并没有拿着水晶 |
| [08:27] | Tina was just standing near me. | 蒂娜只是站在我旁边 |
| [08:28] | Maybe if she’s just there, | 也许只要她在场 |
| [08:29] | you won’t hit your poor penis. | 你就不会撞到你可怜的鸡鸡了 |
| [08:31] | Oh, yeah. Tina, could you do that? | 对啊 蒂娜 你能来吗 |
| [08:33] | – Sure. I guess. – Great, let’s go. | -可以 应该 -太好了 我们走吧 |
| [08:36] | They think Tina and her crystal have powers. | 他们觉得蒂娜和她的水晶有魔力 |
| [08:38] | That rock could make us some paper. | 我看到了变现的机会 |
| [08:40] | And maybe some money, too. | 还能赚钱 |
| [08:44] | Oh, sir! Don’t forget your free fruit or vegetable. | 先生 请挑一个免费的水果或蔬菜 |
| [08:46] | – What? – Yeah, one with every meal. | -什么 -每餐我们都赠送 |
| [08:48] | Take it! | 快拿着 |
| [08:50] | I think I’m just gonna go? | 我还是直接走吧 |
| [08:51] | Sorry, Linda. His loss. | 真遗憾 琳达 是他的损失 |
| [08:53] | Yeah. You want it, Mort? | 是啊 你要吗 莫特 |
| [08:55] | – Here’s your burger, Teddy. – Oh, thanks. | -你的汉堡 泰迪 -谢谢 |
| [08:58] | What’s that? What’s happening? | 这是什么 怎么回事 |
| [08:59] | we’re trying out a new thing. | 我们在作一项新尝试 |
| [09:01] | A side salad is included with your meal. | 在套餐里加一份小菜沙拉 |
| [09:03] | No thanks. It looks weird. | 不用了 谢谢 看着很奇怪 |
| [09:05] | It doesn’t matter what it looks like, Teddy. | 看相不重要 泰迪 |
| [09:07] | Close your eyes and eat it. | 闭上眼睛吃掉就好了 |
| [09:08] | Bob, I know what you’re doing. | 鲍勃 我知道你在干嘛 |
| [09:09] | You’re trying to get rid of your weird vegetables. | 你想处理掉那些奇形怪状的蔬菜 |
| [09:11] | I’m not a garbage disposal. | 我不是垃圾处理器 |
| [09:13] | You kind of are. You ate that lemon rind that time. | 你算是吧 你上次吃了柠檬皮 |
| [09:15] | Oh, this again? | 又提这茬是吧 |
| [09:16] | You put a lemon wedge on my plate. | 你在我盘子里放了一瓣柠檬 |
| [09:18] | What do you think a guy’s gonna do? | 你觉得正常人会怎么做 |
| [09:19] | At least it was a normal-looking lemon. | 至少那还是一瓣看起来正常的柠檬 |
| [09:21] | Bob, let’s face it. | 鲍勃 接受现实吧 |
| [09:22] | Even with the salads and the free ugly food bowl, | 就算是做成沙拉和免费赠送 |
| [09:24] | we’re not gonna get through all this stuff | 我们也无法在这些蔬菜变质前 |
| [09:26] | before it goes bad. | 把它们处理掉 |
| [09:27] | I think we might have to throw out the food | 到时候该扔的还是得扔 |
| [09:29] | we didn’t want anyone to throw out. | 否则该有人吃坏肚子了 |
| [09:30] | Don’t say that! | 别这样说 |
| [09:31] | I mean, what are we supposed to do with this sad, | 那你说我们该怎么处理 |
| [09:32] | old cucumber that’s at the end of its life? | 这根已经走到生命尽头的可怜黄瓜呢 |
| [09:35] | Oh, actually, this one’s going to Mort. | 其实这根是给莫特的 |
| [09:36] | Right. Yay. | 好 棒啊 |
| [09:38] | Wait! That’s it! | 等等 我想到了 |
| [09:39] | I- I know what we can do! | 我知道我们要怎么做了 |
| [09:40] | We’ll just do what Mort does. | 我们就做莫特平时做的 |
| [09:41] | – Eat real slow and chew a million times? – What? | -吃得超级慢 每口都嚼100万次吗 -什么 |
| [09:44] | We pickle it. | 做成泡菜 |
| [09:46] | Ooh! Good idea, Bob! | 好主意啊 鲍勃 |
| [09:48] | Why is that like what I do? | 这怎么是我做的事 |
| [09:49] | You know, like embalming. | 就像你给尸体防腐一样 |
| [09:51] | That’s not even really… Okay, never mind. | 这根本不是 算了 不解释 |
| [09:53] | All of the sudden I’m feeling picklish! | 忽然我就感觉泡菜热情满满 |
| [09:55] | All right! | 开始吧 |
| [09:57] | Tina, my favorite sister… | 蒂娜 我最爱的姐姐 |
| [09:59] | – Hey! – And there’s the crystal. | -嘿 -还有水晶 |
| [10:00] | Good, good. | 很好很好 |
| [10:01] | You know, I’ve been thinking. | 我在想 |
| [10:02] | You and this crystal could help a lot of people. | 你和这个水晶可以帮助很多人 |
| [10:05] | And I feel like it’s our duty | 我觉得我们有义务 |
| [10:06] | to find these people and ask for a small fee | 找到那些人并向他们收取一小笔费用 |
| [10:09] | in order for you to stand next to them. | 好让你站在旁边保佑他们 |
| [10:11] | You love it. | 你喜欢这个计划 |
| [10:11] | Anyway, here’s Peter Pescadero. | 长话短说 这是彼得·派斯卡德罗 |
| [10:13] | And for the low, low price of fifty cents, | 只需区区50美分 |
| [10:15] | he’d like some crystal Tina time. | 他将得到水晶与蒂娜的保佑时间 |
| [10:17] | Wait. What? | 等等 什么 |
| [10:18] | I’ve been working on my breakdancing moves, | 我最近在练习霹雳舞的动作 |
| [10:20] | but I still can’t crack the windmill. | 但一直没能破解旋转风车这个动作 |
| [10:21] | There’s a crack in my windmill. This guy. | 我的风车上倒是有个破洞 就是这家伙 |
| [10:24] | Could you just stand near me | 我练习的时候 |
| [10:25] | while I practice for one second? | 你能站在我边上一会儿吗 |
| [10:27] | Oh. I guess… | 可以吧 |
| [10:28] | But I can’t promise anything is going to happen. | 但我不能保证你能成功 |
| [10:30] | You can do this, Peter. | 你可以的 彼得 |
| [10:32] | Windmill…! | 旋转风车 |
| [10:33] | He’s doing it. I think. | 我做到了 我感觉是 |
| [10:36] | Okay, Rudy, go ask Chloe your question. | 好了鲁迪 去问克洛伊吧 |
| [10:38] | I mean, I still think she’s a dumb shampoo bottle | 我还是觉得她就是一瓶无脑的 |
| [10:40] | in the shape of a person. | 人形洗发水 |
| [10:42] | But you paid your money, so have at it. | 但是你付钱了 所以上吧 |
| [10:44] | Bring it home, Rudy. | 你可以的 鲁迪 |
| [10:45] | Hey, Chloe. | 克洛伊 |
| [10:46] | How about you and I be science partners today? | 今天的科学课可以和我搭档吗 |
| [10:48] | I was gonna be Emmy Butler’s partner today. | 我今天本来和艾美·巴特勒搭档了 |
| [10:51] | – Oh. – But then she got sick, | -这样啊 -但是她生病了 |
| [10:52] | which is gross, so yeah. Just for today. | 真恶心 所以可以 但是仅限今天 |
| [10:55] | And maybe you do all the experiments for both of us, | 你把我们俩的实验全做了吧 |
| [10:57] | ’cause I don’t like wearing the goggles. | 我不想戴护目镜 |
| [10:59] | They hurt my hair. | 戴着会破坏我的发型 |
| [11:00] | – Yes! – Barf. | -太好了 -我吐了 |
| [11:01] | I can’t believe I’m doing this. | 难以相信我在干这事儿 |
| [11:03] | What the heck? | 管他的 |
| [11:04] | It’s for online poker. | 为了赢扑克 不妨一试 |
| [11:06] | I never go all in like this. | 我从来没有全押过 |
| [11:07] | But screw it, I like this hand. | 但去他的 我觉得这手牌有戏 |
| [11:09] | Is it a royal flush? | 是同花顺吗 |
| [11:10] | That’s the only poker hand I know | 我只知道这个牌型 |
| [11:12] | because it sounds like a fancy poop. | 因为它听起来像一坨高贵的大便 |
| [11:14] | Oh, my God, I won! I won! | 天呐 我赢了 我赢了 |
| [11:17] | You know, the right thing to do is to give us half. | 你赢的钱应该分我们一半 |
| [11:19] | – No. – We’ll talk later. | -不行 -稍后再谈 |
| [11:21] | Today is the best day of this young man’s life. | 今天是我这个小年轻一生中最美好的一天 |
| [11:23] | I finally got the corner piece of the mac and cheese. | 我终于打到了边角上的芝士通心粉 |
| [11:26] | – Crystal worked again, huh? – Yup. | -又是水晶起作用了吧 -没错 |
| [11:28] | Every other time I’ve asked, Hildy said, | 以前我每次问 希尔迪都说 |
| [11:29] | “You get what you get and you don’t get upset.” | “打什么吃什么 不准有意见” |
| [11:32] | But this time, Tina’s crystal was there | 但这次 有蒂娜的水晶在 |
| [11:34] | and now I’m in the corner suite, baby! | 让我打到了边角大餐 宝贝 |
| [11:36] | Well, eat up. | 赶紧吃 |
| [11:37] | We got some more crystal customers booked after lunch. | 饭后还有几个顾客要接待 |
| [11:39] | Actually, I was thinking | 老实说 我在想 |
| [11:40] | we should give the crystal a rest. | 我们应该让水晶休息一下了 |
| [11:42] | I’m not sure exactly how it works, | 我不知道它具体怎么运作 |
| [11:43] | but… maybe we should save some of its powers | 但是 也许我们应该保留一点它的魔力 |
| [11:46] | for me and the assembly? | 给我在校庆大会上用 |
| [11:47] | I mean, I don’t know how to recharge this thing. | 我不知道要怎么给它充电 |
| [11:49] | I bet Billy Crystal would know. | 比利·克里斯托肯定知道 |
| [11:50] | Tina! There you are. | 蒂娜 你在这儿啊 |
| [11:52] | Cassie said yes to having Cassie-role with me. | 卡茜答应和我一起吃卡茜锅了 |
| [11:54] | Also, she asked me about the crystal | 她还问我水晶的事 |
| [11:56] | and I said I was enjoying it very much. | 我说我用得很好 |
| [11:57] | So I will be needing it back after you give your speech. | 所以你演讲完后就得还我了 |
| [12:01] | You okay, Jocelyn? | 没事吧 乔丝玲 |
| [12:02] | I’m fine. I tripped on my jean laces. | 没事 我踩到裤带了 |
| [12:05] | So, Tina, as I was saying, I’ll need the crystal back. | 蒂娜 就如我刚刚所说 我需要拿回水晶 |
| [12:08] | Okay, Mr. Frond. I’ll give it back to you after the assembly. | 好的 福旺德老师 校庆大会后就还你 |
| [12:11] | And don’t worry, I’m taking good care of it. | 别担心 我有好好保管 |
| [12:12] | Oh, my God! It’s gone! | 我的天啊 水晶不见了 |
| [12:13] | What do you mean, “It’s gone”? | 你说什么 “不见了” |
| [12:15] | It was right here just a second ago! | 一秒钟之前水晶还在 |
| [12:16] | So was my mac and cheese! | 我的芝士通心粉也一样 |
| [12:18] | Oh, no. It’s there. Hi, you. | 不对 还在 你好啊 |
| [12:23] | Where’s Cassie’s crystal? | 卡茜的水晶去哪了 |
| [12:25] | Yeah, Tina! Where’s Cassie’s crystal? | 是啊 蒂娜 卡茜的水晶去哪了 |
| [12:27] | It was right there! On the table! | 刚刚还在这 就在桌子上 |
| [12:29] | One of the alumni keeps texting me. | 有一个校友一直在给我发短信 |
| [12:31] | He wants to know where to park his scooter. | 他想知道该把小型摩托停哪 |
| [12:33] | Tina, I need the crystal back by the end of the day. | 蒂娜 我需要在今天结束前拿回水晶 |
| [12:35] | Or else my Cassie-role is grass. | 否则我的卡茜锅就泡汤了 |
| [12:38] | Oh, my God. | 我的天啊 |
| [12:39] | If we don’t find it, my Cassie-role is grass, too! | 如果我们找不到 我的卡茜锅也泡汤了 |
| [12:41] | I’ll have to do the report with Zeke | 我得在没有水晶的情况下 |
| [12:42] | in front of the whole school with no crystal! | 和齐克一起在全校面前作报告 |
| [12:44] | Someone must’ve stolen it. | 一定是有人偷走了 |
| [12:46] | And during peak crystal business hours. | 就在这水晶租赁高峰期 |
| [12:48] | We gotta find this monster. | 我们得找出这个禽兽 |
| [12:49] | And we’ll start right after lunch. | 我们吃完午饭就开始 |
| [12:51] | – Gene… – Fine. | -吉恩 -好吧 |
| [12:52] | But the mac and cheese is coming with us. | 但是我得把芝士通心粉端上 |
| [12:54] | * Crystal, crystal, crystal * | *水晶 水晶 水晶* |
| [12:58] | * Who can pull the missing crystal? * | *谁能找回丢失的水晶* |
| [13:02] | * Distracting just to find the crystal * | *分散他们注意力 好找到水晶* |
| [13:06] | * Crystal, crystal, crystal, crystal. * | *水晶 水晶 水晶* |
| [13:12] | * We’re pickling * | *我们在腌制* |
| [13:13] | * Just like the cavemen used to do. * | *就和穴居人一样* |
| [13:17] | Here are all the jars we have. | 这里是我们所有的罐子了 |
| [13:18] | Oh, God. That’s a lot of smell. | 天啊 味道好大 |
| [13:20] | – What smell? – The vinegar. | -什么味道 -醋酸味 |
| [13:21] | It’s really strong. | 真的好浓 |
| [13:23] | We might’ve pickled our whole restaurant. | 我们可能把整个餐厅都染上味道了 |
| [13:24] | Wh-Why can’t I smell it? | 为什么我闻不到 |
| [13:26] | You’re pickled. Go to the basement and come back up. | 你也被腌了 去一趟地下室 然后回来 |
| [13:28] | Okay… Going down, going down. | 好 我下楼了 下楼了 |
| [13:31] | It’s really dirty down here, we should clean it. | 这下面真的很脏 我们应该打扫一下 |
| [13:33] | Turning around and… Oh, God! | 我回来了 天啊 |
| [13:35] | What have we done? You did this to us! | 我们做了什么 都是你的错 |
| [13:37] | I’m sorry! I thought I did good! | 我很抱歉 我以为我想了个好办法 |
| [13:39] | The produce is cursed, Bob! | 那些农产品被诅咒了 鲍勃 |
| [13:40] | No! They’re just ugly! | 不 它们只是丑了点 |
| [13:42] | Same thing! | 一回事 |
| [13:43] | This is going to destroy everything we built together. | 这会毁了我们苦心经营的一切 |
| [13:46] | Wait, I can’t smell it anymore. | 等等 我闻不到了 |
| [13:48] | Yeah. Me, neither. | 是啊 我也是 |
| [13:49] | – Should we keep pickling? – Yeah, it’s kinda fun. | -我们继续腌吧 -好啊 还挺好玩的 |
| [13:50] | * Picklin’, picklin’… * | *腌制 腌制* |
| [13:54] | The assembly’s in one hour. | 校庆大会一小时后就开始了 |
| [13:55] | We’ll never find the crystal before then. | 我们来不及找到水晶了 |
| [13:57] | There it is! | 在那里 |
| [13:58] | The crystal! Tammy has it. | 水晶 苔米手上 |
| [13:59] | What? No, I don’t! | 什么 我没有 |
| [14:01] | Wait a minute. | 等一下 |
| [14:02] | You had Jocelyn create a distraction in the cafeteria | 你让乔丝玲造作地摔了一大跤 |
| [14:05] | with her big, dramatic fall, didn’t you? | 转移我们的注意力 是吧 |
| [14:07] | No. You know Jocelyn’s knees don’t bend right. | 没有 你们都知道乔丝玲的膝盖有问题 |
| [14:10] | Give me back my crystal, Tammy! | 把我的水晶还给我 苔米 |
| [14:11] | It’s not your crystal, Tina. | 这不是你的水晶 蒂娜 |
| [14:13] | It’s Mr. Frond’s. You borrowed it from him. | 这是福旺德老师的 你从他那借的 |
| [14:16] | And maybe I borrowed it from you | 或许我也是从你那借的 |
| [14:17] | and I’m gonna give it back to Mr. Frond | 而且等我用完了之后 |
| [14:19] | when I am done with it. | 我会还给福旺德老师 |
| [14:20] | Because maybe I need some crystal power. | 因为或许我需要水晶的魔力 |
| [14:23] | What are you talking about? | 你在说什么 |
| [14:24] | I found out that one of the alumni who’s coming to the assembly | 我发现来参加校庆大会的校友之一 |
| [14:27] | is the woman who owns the boutique Mary Queen of Skorts. | 是坐拥裙式短裤女王玛丽精品店的女人 |
| [14:30] | Yeah, I know, she was in my report. | 没错 我认识她 她在我的报告里 |
| [14:31] | Yeah. And she’s in the fashion industry, Tina. | 对 她是时尚界的一份子 蒂娜 |
| [14:35] | If she likes my presentation, | 如果她喜欢我的展示 |
| [14:37] | she might take me under her wing. | 她也许会将我招入她的羽翼之下 |
| [14:38] | I could be Anne Hathaway to her Meryl Streep, | 她就能像斯特里普对海瑟薇一样 是我的伯乐 |
| [14:40] | but I’d be blonde, which is even better. | 但是我是金发 这更有利 |
| [14:43] | Something’s falling out of my hands | 有东西从我手上漏下去了 |
| [14:44] | and into my locker and it’s closed. | 掉进了我的储物柜 储物柜关上了 |
| [14:48] | Now what do we do? | 我们现在怎么办 |
| [14:49] | I’ll tell you what we’re gonna do. | 我告诉你我们该怎么办 |
| [14:50] | We’re gonna go to class, | 我们去上课 |
| [14:51] | get some bathroom passes, | 上课的时候说要上厕所 |
| [14:53] | and break into Tammy’s locker. | 然后撬开苔米的储物柜 |
| [14:54] | And then what? Oh. Right. Get the crystal. | 然后呢 对了 拿水晶 |
| [14:57] | Glad you came back for a second lunch, Teddy. | 很高兴你回来吃第二顿午餐了 泰迪 |
| [14:59] | Because now you get to try the quick pickles. | 因为你现在可以尝尝速成腌菜了 |
| [15:02] | They should be ready. | 这些应该好了 |
| [15:03] | Oh, what a surprise. | 真是个惊喜 |
| [15:04] | Bob is trying to foist his ugly vegetables on people. | 鲍勃一直在强迫别人吃丑丑的蔬菜 |
| [15:07] | I’m ignoring that, because they’re pickles now. | 我就当听不到 因为这些是腌菜了 |
| [15:09] | They’re reborn. | 它们重生了 |
| [15:10] | They’re pretty pickle butterflies. | 它们是是美丽的腌菜蝴蝶 |
| [15:12] | And I won’t smell like this forever, right? | 我身上不会一直有这个味道吧 |
| [15:14] | – Right? – Pickled carrot, anyone? | -不会吧 -腌萝卜 有人要吃吗 |
| [15:17] | – No, thanks. – I’ll try it. | -丑拒 谢谢 -我试试 |
| [15:19] | You can’t even taste how mangled it looked. | 你吃的时候尝不出它有多丑 |
| [15:21] | Pickled cauliflower? | 腌花椰菜吗 |
| [15:22] | I think that’s a strawberry. | 我想这是草莓 |
| [15:24] | Oh, my God, I think that is a strawberry. | 天啊 我想这是草莓 |
| [15:25] | – Teddy? – Nah, I’m gonna pass. | -泰迪 -不 我不要了 |
| [15:28] | You know what, Teddy? | 知道吗 泰迪 |
| [15:28] | These pickles aren’t for you. | 这些泡菜不是给你准备的 |
| [15:30] | They’re for people who don’t want to waste food | 它们是给那些不想浪费食物 |
| [15:32] | and want to make the world a better place. | 想让这个地球变得更好的人准备的 |
| [15:34] | That strawberry doesn’t want to make the world a better place. | 那个草莓并不想让这个世界变得更好 |
| [15:37] | It’s frowning. It looks mean. | 它皱着眉头 一副刻薄样 |
| [15:38] | I’m not mean, Teddy, | 我不刻薄 泰迪 |
| [15:40] | I’m a nice strawberry. | 我是颗友善的草莓 |
| [15:42] | Stop it! | 别这样 |
| [15:43] | Sorry I’m late. | 抱歉 我来晚了 |
| [15:44] | I got my bathroom pass | 我请假出来上厕所 |
| [15:45] | and then I actually had to go to the bathroom. | 然后我就真不得不去洗手间 |
| [15:47] | How’s it going here? | 进行的怎么样了 |
| [15:48] | I mean, I don’t feel totally great | 撒谎逃课 |
| [15:49] | about lying to get out of class. | 让我觉得很不好 |
| [15:51] | And if we don’t get the crystal, | 如果我们拿不到水晶 |
| [15:52] | I’m probably gonna have a super sweaty, phlegmy meltdown | 我可能会在全校面前崩溃 一身大汗 |
| [15:54] | in front of the whole school. | 嗓子卡痰 |
| [15:55] | And Mr. Frond’s gonna hate me. | 福旺德老师会恨我 |
| [15:57] | – But other than that, fine. – Great! | -但除此以外 都还好 -很好 |
| [15:59] | Everything at this school is lousy | 这个学校里的一切都很差劲 |
| [16:01] | except for these weirdly amazing, | 除了这些奇怪的 |
| [16:03] | hard-to-break-into lockers. | 怎么都打不开的储物柜 |
| [16:05] | This is embarrassing– Ooh! I got it! | 这太尴尬了… 我打开了 |
| [16:07] | Yes! | 太棒了 |
| [16:08] | You guys are stealing the crystal from me! | 你们在偷我的水晶 |
| [16:11] | You stole it from me! | 是你从我这里偷的 |
| [16:12] | What does that have to do with anything? | 这有什么关系吗 |
| [16:14] | – Let go! – You go. | -放手 -你放手 |
| [16:18] | – Oh, no! – Oh, my God. | -不要 -天啊 |
| [16:20] | You know what, Tina? | 知道吗 蒂娜 |
| [16:21] | You can have it. | 这是你的了 |
| [16:22] | See you at the assembly. | 校庆大会上见 |
| [16:24] | Damn it, Tammy! | 该死的 苔米 |
| [16:26] | The crystal! It’s dead! | 水晶死了 |
| [16:28] | Unless it’s one of those crystals | 除非这种水晶 |
| [16:29] | that crawls back together? | 能重新聚成一块 |
| [16:31] | – Nope. – Tina, there you are. | -不会 -蒂娜 你在这里呀 |
| [16:33] | Please tell me you found the… | 请告诉我你找到了… |
| [16:35] | I’m so sorry. | 非常对不起 |
| [16:38] | I hear they’re doing great things | 我听说他们如今能用胶水 |
| [16:39] | with glue these days. | 做很多了不起的事 |
| [16:41] | Let’s go. | 我们走吧 |
| [16:48] | There’s Mary Queen of Skorts. | 那是裙式短裤女王玛丽 |
| [16:49] | Should I wave? Hey! | 我该挥手示意吗 你好 |
| [16:51] | Okay, she didn’t wave back or look in my direction, | 好吧 她没有向我挥手或看过来 |
| [16:53] | but I think she saw me and was like, “Who’s that girl?” | 但我觉得她看见我了 她在想”那女孩是谁” |
| [16:56] | Hey, Tina, you okay? ‘Cause you seem kind of nervous. | 蒂娜 你还好吗 因为你看起来有点紧张 |
| [16:58] | And you’re perspiring– a lot. | 你流了好多汗 |
| [17:01] | What? | 什么 |
| [17:01] | Don’t worry, we’ll be all right. | 别担心 我们会没事的 |
| [17:03] | You got the crystal. | 你有水晶 |
| [17:04] | Yeah, so… actually, I don’t. | 好吧 实际上 我没有 |
| [17:07] | Because Tammy stole it | 因为苔米偷走了水晶 |
| [17:08] | and then we got in a fight and broke it. | 然后我们打了一架 把水晶摔碎了 |
| [17:10] | Get over it, Tina. | 别去想了 蒂娜 |
| [17:10] | That was like ten minutes ago. | 这是十分钟前的事了 |
| [17:12] | Hold up. You don’t have the crystal, Tina? | 等等 你没有水晶吗 蒂娜 |
| [17:14] | – No. – Oh, boy. | -没有 -天啊 |
| [17:15] | Now I’m sweatin’. | 现在换我出汗了 |
| [17:16] | Right across my little, tiny mustache. | 汗水流过了我的小胡子 |
| [17:18] | It’s there. | 我有胡子 |
| [17:19] | Thank you, fifth grade, for that somber rendition | 五年级同学 感谢你们对火柴盒乐队 |
| [17:21] | of Matchbox Twenty’s “How Far We’ve Come.” | 《我们已经走了多远》的忧郁演奏 |
| [17:24] | Kazoos have never sounded so haunting. | 卡祖笛从未听起来如此诡异 |
| [17:27] | So… Wagstaff. | 瓦格斯塔夫小学 |
| [17:29] | 75 years, huh? | 75年了 对吗 |
| [17:30] | What a rich, wonderful past this school has had. | 这个学校有着多么丰富的历史和美好的过去 |
| [17:33] | But, eventually, everything is broken. | 但最终 一切都会破碎 |
| [17:36] | And dreams die. | 梦想会死去 |
| [17:37] | He’s taking it well. | 他坦然地接受了 |
| [17:39] | That’s it for this jar. | 这罐好了 |
| [17:40] | – Served all the pickles. – Great. | -所有泡菜都腌上了 -很好 |
| [17:42] | So we’ll just keep doing our part, being good people | 我们要继续我们的工作 做个好人 |
| [17:45] | and getting a box of ugly produce every week. | 每周买一箱难看的蔬菜水果 |
| [17:47] | – I love it. – Yeah… yeah. | -我很喜欢 -是的 好吧 |
| [17:49] | What? What’s with the face? | 怎么了 你这表情是什么意思 |
| [17:50] | You look like someone peed in your pickle jar. | 你看起来就像有人在你的泡菜罐里尿尿了 |
| [17:52] | It’s just… I mean, all of this was so much work. | 就是… 所有这些的工作量好大 |
| [17:55] | And everything smells. | 一切都好臭 |
| [17:57] | – Including you. – No! | -包括你 -不 |
| [17:59] | It’s true, Lin. You do. You both do. | 是真的 琳 你很臭 你俩都臭 |
| [18:02] | Should we… never do this again? | 我们是不是别再这样做了 |
| [18:04] | – Oh, thank God. – Oh, thank God. | -谢天谢地 -谢天谢地 |
| [18:05] | I was only doing this | 我这么做只是因为 |
| [18:06] | because I thought you really wanted to. | 我以为你很想这样 |
| [18:08] | I did. | 我之前是 |
| [18:08] | – But now I really, really don’t. – Yeah. | -但现在 我真的很不想这样 -好吧 |
| [18:11] | At least we saved all these sweet ugly babies | 至少我们救了这些可爱的丑宝贝 |
| [18:13] | from going to the dumpster. | 让它们不会被丢进垃圾箱 |
| [18:15] | We’re gonna get into heaven now, right? | 我们现在能上天堂了 对吗 |
| [18:17] | – Yeah. – I want to go to heaven, | -是的 -我想上天堂 |
| [18:18] | but not like that. | 但不是像这样 |
| [18:19] | Not like that. | 但不是这样 |
| [18:20] | And we all die alone. | 我们都将孑然死去 |
| [18:23] | And now, I’d like to bring up eighth graders Tina and Zeke | 现在 有请八年级的蒂娜和齐克 |
| [18:26] | to give their report entitled | 带来汇报演说 |
| [18:27] | “I Spy Amazing Alumni.” | 《我看见了杰出校友》 |
| [18:30] | Oh, God. | 天哪 |
| [18:32] | Hey, Tina, when you look back at 75 years of Wagstaff… | 蒂娜 当你回顾瓦格斯塔夫小学这75年 |
| [18:35] | – What do I see? – Okay… | -我想到了什么 -好吧 |
| [18:37] | I Spy Amazing Alumni! | 我看见了杰出校友 |
| [18:41] | Oh, no. | 垮了 |
| [18:42] | Let’s talk about those amazing alu… | 我们来聊聊那些杰出的校… |
| [18:46] | Sorry. Little phlegm. | 抱歉 有点咯痰了 |
| [18:47] | Anyway, ever heard of mary Queen of Skorts? | 总之 你有没有听说过裙式短裤女王玛丽 |
| [18:50] | Oh, wait. That was your part, Zeke. | 不对 这部分该你说 齐克 |
| [18:53] | Oh, now it’s me. | 又该我了 |
| [18:55] | She’s skort of a big… deal. | 她的短裤裙可…厉害了 |
| [18:58] | – Oh, boy. – I’m sorry. | -天哪 -抱歉 |
| [19:00] | I’m sorry, everyone. | 对不起 各位 |
| [19:01] | I’m not great at oral reports, | 我不擅长口头汇报 |
| [19:02] | and when I have a partner, | 特别是有搭档之后 |
| [19:03] | that makes me even more nervous. | 我就更紧张了 |
| [19:05] | I sweat like crazy. | 我真的汗流浃背 |
| [19:06] | And I get weird phlegm in my mouth. | 嘴里也有奇怪的痰 |
| [19:08] | It’s like a spit smoothie in there. | 就好像唾沫做成了奶昔 |
| [19:10] | And I’m extra nervous because I don’t have the crystal. | 我的紧张还源于我的水晶没了 |
| [19:12] | That’s a whole other thing. I had a crystal. | 我就要说起另一件事了 我曾经有水晶 |
| [19:14] | It might have had magic powers. I don’t know. | 它可能有什么特殊的魔力 我也不知道 |
| [19:17] | Are we still doing our report? | 我们还在汇报吗 |
| [19:18] | Anyway, maybe I should just accept that I get nervous. | 或许我应该接受我会紧张这个事实 |
| [19:21] | And maybe that’s okay. | 这也没什么大不了的 |
| [19:22] | I mean, why try not to be nervous when I definitely am? | 为什么明知我会紧张 还要让我不紧张呢 |
| [19:25] | I mean, look at this pit sweat. | 看看我咯吱窝里的汗 |
| [19:26] | Anyone need me to put out a small fire? | 有人需要我用这身汗灭个火吗 |
| [19:31] | Feels good to say it all out loud. | 大声说出来真痛快 |
| [19:32] | So, anyway… | 总之 |
| [19:33] | Oops! I’m getting the “Wrap it up” signal. | 我们到了总结发言的时间了 |
| [19:35] | Or that kid just really wants me to look at her watch. | 或者那个场务只是让给我炫耀她的手表 |
| [19:37] | Thank you! | 谢谢大家 |
| [19:40] | Well, didn’t really get to talk about the Wagstaff alumni | 我们刚才没谈到瓦格斯塔夫校友的事情 |
| [19:42] | or… just about anything in our report. | 或 报告上的任何内容 |
| [19:45] | But I tell ya– | 但是我跟你说 |
| [19:45] | it was a pretty nice little speech. | 刚才的演讲真的很不错 |
| [19:47] | Good job, partner. | 干得好 搭档 |
| [19:48] | And you made being sweaty and nervous kind of cool. | 你把紧张流汗这种事说得特别酷 |
| [19:50] | Thanks. I’m gonna go get some water. | 谢谢 我要去喝口水 |
| [19:53] | Good idea. | 好主意 |
| [19:54] | You sound like phlegm-ageddon, girl! | 浓痰在你嗓子里打架吗 |
| [19:55] | Eighth graders Tammy and Jocelyn with their report on | 八年级的苔米和乔丝玲将带来她们的演讲 |
| [19:59] | Wagstaff fashions past and present. | 《瓦格斯塔夫小学古今潮流》 |
| [20:00] | Sorry. Sorry. | 抱歉 借过 |
| [20:02] | Wait! Where is she going? | 等等 她要去哪 |
| [20:03] | She’s gonna miss our speech. | 她要错过我们的演讲了 |
| [20:06] | Now she’s never gonna take me | 她永远也不会带我去 |
| [20:07] | to Paris Skort Fashion Week with her. | 巴黎短裤裙时装周了 |
| [20:10] | Tina, I liked your speech. | 蒂娜 我喜欢你的演讲 |
| [20:12] | I mean, it was very awkward. | 虽然现场很尴尬 |
| [20:14] | – So awkward… – Thank you? | -非常尴尬 -谢谢 |
| [20:16] | And in a way, | 从某种方面来说 |
| [20:17] | your speech gave me the push I needed | 你的演讲给了我勇气 |
| [20:19] | to leave Cassie a long and very emotional voice mail | 给卡茜发了很长且富有感情的语音留言 |
| [20:22] | about her crystal. | 告诉她关于水晶的事 |
| [20:23] | And she just texted me | 她刚发信息给我 |
| [20:24] | that she believes crystals don’t really “break.” | 说她相信水晶不会”破碎” |
| [20:26] | She says the energy just “spreads out.” | 她说能量直接”释放”了出来 |
| [20:29] | Really? Phew! | 真的吗 吓死我了 |
| [20:30] | She’s very wise, like a pretty owl. | 她真聪明 像只漂亮的小猫头鹰 |
| [20:33] | And she still wants to come over for Cassie-role. | 她还想过来吃卡茜锅 |
| [20:36] | – Oh, good. – Ooh, I should go. | -太好了 -我该走了 |
| [20:37] | I need to get all the cat hair off the furniture | 我要在卡茜来之前 |
| [20:39] | before Cassie comes. | 把家具上的猫毛都处理掉 |
| [20:40] | Great speech, T. | 演讲很不错 蒂娜 |
| [20:42] | At one point I think you sprayed some of your mouth phlegm | 有一瞬间我还以为你把嗓子里的痰 |
| [20:44] | onto your armpit sweat. That was magical. | 吐到咯吱窝的汗里了 太神奇了 |
| [20:46] | – Thanks. – Well, I got about $3.50 | -谢谢 -我攒了大约 |
| [20:49] | of crystal money in my pocket. | 三块五用来卖水晶的钱 |
| [20:50] | Is that enough to buy me a new shirt on the way home? | 够不够回家路上给我买件新衣服啊 |
| [20:53] | Probably not. | 估计不够 |
| [20:53] | But maybe a medium frozen yogurt? | 不过一份中杯冻酸奶应该可以 |
| [20:55] | – Three spoons? – Deal. | -要三个勺子吗 -好的 |
| [20:56] | You can make it two spoons. | 要两个勺子就行 |
| [20:58] | I like to use my hands. | 我比较喜欢用手 |
| [20:59] | – Nope. Nope. – Nope. Nope. | -不了不了 -不了不了 |
| [20:59] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:03] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:07] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:11] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:16] | * When you and your partner have an oral report * | *当你和搭档要口头汇报* |
| [21:17] | * And you’re feeling really out of sorts * | *当你感到非常六神无主* |
| [21:19] | * Maybe get yourself a nice crystal, * | *买个漂亮的水晶吧* |
| [21:21] | * it’ll only stab you a little * | *只会戳伤你一点* |
| [21:23] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:27] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |
| [21:31] | * Crystal power * | *水晶魔力* |