| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:12] | 妈妈都知道 虫子逃不了 除虫害公司 | |
| [00:20] | Sick? What? | 生病 怎么可能 |
| [00:22] | I mean, barely. | 只是一点点 |
| [00:23] | It’s nothing. It’s really nothing. | 好得很 真的好得很 |
| [00:26] | Oh, God. | 我的天 |
| [00:27] | I-I just don’t think it’s a good idea | 我觉得你今晚 |
| [00:29] | for you to go tonight. | 还是不要去了 |
| [00:30] | And miss the kids’ “Mother’s Day Assembly” At school? No way. | 然后错过孩子们的母亲节晚会 不要 |
| [00:34] | You mean “Mothers and Primary Caregivers | 你是说”母亲及一级保姆 |
| [00:36] | Appreciation Cabaret.” | 慰劳歌舞表演会” |
| [00:37] | Lin, nobody would be able to hear the performance | 琳 你一直咳嗽 |
| [00:39] | over your constant coughing. | 其他人就没办法好好看演出了 |
| [00:41] | Plus you’d get everyone sick | 而且你会传染给所有人 |
| [00:42] | since you’re terrible at covering your sneezes. | 因为你打喷嚏的时候完全捂不住 |
| [00:47] | That was all over me. | 喷了我一身 |
| [00:48] | Silly me without my poncho. | 没穿雨衣我真是太蠢了 |
| [00:49] | Lin, what if I record the performance for you? | 我帮你把演出录下来如何 |
| [00:52] | It’s not the same thing. | 这不是一回事 |
| [00:54] | Whoa, is that the flux capacitor? | 这是传说中的磁通量电容吗 |
| [00:56] | Does that transform into anything? | 这玩意会变形吗 |
| [00:58] | No, but it records just fine. | 不会 但是录像功能完好 |
| [01:00] | Yeah, people are fools for using a higher quality machine | 是啊 干嘛要用那种更高级 可以 |
| [01:03] | – that also fits in their pocket. – But, Bob, | -揣进口袋的机器 真笨 -可是 |
| [01:05] | – you’re a terrible cameraman. – What?! | -你摄影技术太差了 -什么 |
| [01:07] | You’re too worried about blocking people’s view. | 你总是害怕挡住别人 |
| [01:09] | A school function is not the place to be polite. | 学校典礼可不是用来让你礼让的 |
| [01:12] | Okay, I’ll be more rude. | 好的 我会更粗鲁一点的 |
| [01:14] | Good. And I don’t want to hear you | 很好 而且请不要 |
| [01:16] | breathing into the mic either. | 对着麦克风呼气 |
| [01:17] | It’s like there’s always a monster just off screen. | 就好像屏幕外一直跟着只怪兽 |
| [01:20] | Don’t breathe. Got it. | 不要呼气 明白了 |
| [01:21] | It’ll be like you were there, Lin. | 一定让你身临其境 |
| [01:23] | – You promise? – Promise. | -你保证吗 -保证 |
| [01:24] | All right, we got to go. | 好了 我们该走了 |
| [01:26] | Everyone lift the camera on the count of three. | 数到三 大家一起把摄像机抬起来 |
| [01:28] | One, two… | 一 二 |
| [01:34] | Welcome. | 欢迎 |
| [01:35] | In honor of Mother’s Day on Sunday, | 为了庆祝周日的母亲节 |
| [01:37] | each of our grades will wow you with a song | 每个年级都会用一首歌 |
| [01:39] | or dazzle you with a skit. | 或是一出短剧带给你们惊喜 |
| [01:41] | Mothers and mother-like caregivers, | 母亲们 以及母亲一样的保姆们 |
| [01:43] | prepare to be appreciated. | 享受慰劳的时光吧 |
| [01:46] | Oh, God, squatting is so hard. | 我去 蹲着怎么这么难 |
| [01:48] | And now, our fourth graders will take you back | 现在 四年级的同学将表演 |
| [01:50] | to the Old West, with “Mom on the Range!” | 《山脉中的妈妈》 让我们重回西部时代 |
| [01:58] | “End of tape”? | 已达磁带结尾 |
| [01:59] | No, no, no, no, no. Rewind faster. | 不 不 倒快点 |
| [02:01] | *Mom, Mom on the range* | *山脉中的妈妈* |
| [02:05] | *Where the deer and the mom-elope play * | *小鹿和羚羊妈妈玩耍* |
| [02:09] | All rewound. | 倒完了 |
| [02:10] | And here we go. | 开始录 |
| [02:12] | *The end!* | *结束* |
| [02:16] | Oh, crap, it’s over. | 糟了 唱完了 |
| [02:18] | Okay, at least I can get Gene and Tina’s. | 好吧 至少还能录到吉恩和蒂娜 |
| [02:20] | Two out of three. Not terrible. | 三人里能录俩 还行 |
| [02:22] | Our sixth graders have been studying myths. | 六年级的孩子们最近在研究神话 |
| [02:25] | Put your hands together for them. | 现在请鼓掌欢迎 |
| [02:27] | They’re mythological and mytho-lovable. | 像神话一样神秘又可爱的 |
| [02:29] | The sixth grade! | 六年级 |
| [02:34] | “Battery dead”? | 电量低 |
| [02:35] | No, no, no. | 不 不 |
| [02:37] | Oh, I have the cord. | 我带了充电线 |
| [02:38] | I just need an outlet. | 只需找到插座 |
| [02:39] | Excuse me, excuse me. | 不好意思 不好意思 |
| [02:41] | *Our lives are eternal * | *我们生命不息* |
| [02:44] | *Are eternal * | *生命不息* |
| [02:45] | Dang it. | 啥玩意 |
| [02:46] | *Your love is maternal * | *你母爱无边* |
| [02:48] | *Maternal * | *母爱无边* |
| [02:50] | *That’s gods for ya * | *那是你们的神* |
| [02:53] | All right. | 好了 |
| [02:55] | *The end * | *结束* |
| [02:57] | The end. | 结束 |
| [02:58] | Damn it. Oh. Okay, I can still get Tina. | 我去 好吧 至少还有蒂娜 |
| [03:01] | One is something, right? | 一个也很重要 对吧 |
| [03:03] | And now, your favorite space cadets, | 接下来是备受瞩目的太空军校学员 |
| [03:06] | The eighth graders! | 八年级 |
| [03:08] | All right, all right, here we, here we go. | 好了 来吧 |
| [03:11] | -Moms are very special people. – no, no, no, no. | -妈妈们是非常与众不同的人 -不 |
| [03:13] | That’s why they’re called moms. | 所以她们才被称为妈妈 |
| [03:15] | Don’t you die on me, camera. | 你别给我捅娄子 |
| [03:17] | I guess you could say… | 我想你可以说 |
| [03:20] | I guess Tina could say… | 我想蒂娜会说 |
| [03:23] | It’s your line, girl. | 到你的台词了 妹子 |
| [03:24] | Oh. Moms are out of this world. | 妈妈们只应天上有 |
| [03:27] | And step-moms, right, Cheryl? | 继母也是 对吧 谢丽尔 |
| [03:28] | Love you, girl! | 爱你哦 |
| [03:32] | Dad, we have to go inside | 老爸 我们总得进去的 |
| [03:35] | At some point, that’s our home. | 那是我们家 |
| [03:36] | Plus, maybe it’s okay that Mom that will never see that. | 而且 也许老妈看不到那些表演更好 |
| [03:39] | – ‘Cause it was awful. – It was crap. | -因为都很烂 -一团糟 |
| [03:41] | Hey, maybe she won’t be that mad. | 也许她不会太生气 |
| [03:43] | What?! You didn’t record it?! | 什么 你没录 |
| [03:48] | – Oh, boy. – Nothing?! | -我的妈 -一点也没录 |
| [03:50] | My babies! | 我的宝贝们 |
| [03:51] | I’m so sorry, Lin. | 很抱歉 琳 |
| [03:53] | It’s gone, it’s all gone forever. | 都没了 全都没了 |
| [03:55] | All over me. | 喷了我一身 |
| [03:56] | I mean, maybe you kids could kind of describe | 你们可以给妈妈描述一下 |
| [03:59] | the performance a little for your mom. | 演出的情况 |
| [04:01] | That might help Dad. | 这会帮老爸的大忙 |
| [04:02] | Me, I’m your dad. | 也就是我 你们老爸 |
| [04:04] | All right, tell me your performances. | 好吧 跟我说说你们的表演 |
| [04:07] | Just like they happened. | 务必还原现场 |
| [04:09] | Let me just get this last little bit out. | 让我把最后一点给弄出来 |
| [04:12] | Hey, guys. | 大家 |
| [04:13] | We don’t have to tell it exactly as it happened. | 我们不用完全还原现场 |
| [04:16] | Right. Because that would be depressing for her. | 没错 那会让她难受的 |
| [04:19] | Yeah, I mean, we could goose the performances a little bit. | 我是说 我们可以美化一下 |
| [04:22] | Yeah, yeah, do that. | 好的 就这样 |
| [04:24] | Yeah. Let’s give Mom a real show. | 咱给老妈演一场真正精彩的 |
| [04:25] | She deserves a good Mother’s Day present. | 她值得一份好的母亲节礼物 |
| [04:27] | Also, will you go before me? | 你们可以先来吗 |
| [04:28] | I don’t know what “Goose the performances” Means. | 我还没听明白什么叫”美化一下” |
| [04:31] | Okay. There she is. | 好了 搞定 |
| [04:34] | Mother, I’ll go first. | 老妈 我先来 |
| [04:35] | My class did a Western. | 我们班演的是西部故事 |
| [04:37] | It was pretty gritty, pretty raw. | 坚毅果敢 狂野不羁 |
| [04:39] | It was called… | 名字就叫 |
| [04:40] | “The Town with No Moms.” | 没有妈妈的小镇 |
| [04:43] | The set design was real impressive. | 布景设计非常壮观 |
| [04:45] | I mean, a bunch of kids stayed late to do it. | 很多学生留到很晚才做好的 |
| [04:47] | Okay, all right. | 好吧 |
| [04:49] | It had been a normal old – | 这里本是古老平常的西部小镇 |
| [04:50] | western town till Meanie McQueen came in, | 直到米妮麦奎因来到这里 |
| [04:53] | breaking glass and kicking ass. | 砸杯子 甩脸子 |
| [04:55] | Which was bad for the sheriff. | 这让警长很不好过 |
| [04:57] | Once again, I’m gonna ask you nicely to stop doing that. | 我想再一次友好地请你别再闹事了 |
| [05:00] | Let me think about it. | 我考虑一下 |
| [05:02] | – Nope. – Well, thanks for considering it. | -不要 -谢谢你的考虑 |
| [05:04] | I do like your choice in jewelry. | 不过我喜欢你对珠宝的品味 |
| [05:06] | I bet it’d look mighty good on me. | 戴我身上肯定很好看 |
| [05:08] | – Give me it. – I’d rather not. | -给我 -不好吧 |
| [05:10] | Give me your badge, Sheriff! | 把警徽给我警长 |
| [05:12] | No, I don’t want to! | 我不想 |
| [05:14] | Now she’s the sheriff! | 现在她是警长了 |
| [05:16] | The moms of the town tried to stand up to Meanie, | 小镇的母亲们想反抗米妮 |
| [05:19] | so Meanie and her goons locked them all up. | 但米妮和她的爪牙们把她们关了起来 |
| [05:21] | Hence the title of the play. “The Town with No Moms.” | 所以这出剧叫”没有妈妈的小镇” |
| [05:25] | Okay, yeah. | 好吧 |
| [05:26] | The sheriff knew he couldn’t handle | 警长知道以一己之力 |
| [05:28] | Meanie McQueen on his own. | 无法对付米妮麦奎因 |
| [05:29] | He needed help | 他需要帮助 |
| [05:30] | from the roughest, toughest, | 需要他认识的最狂野 最粗犷的 |
| [05:32] | cactus kicker he ever knew. | 狠角色的帮助 |
| [05:34] | – Mom? – Hello, son. | -妈 -你好 儿子 |
| [05:35] | – What you knitting? – Spurs. | -你在编什么 -靴刺 |
| [05:37] | I need your help. | 我需要你的帮忙 |
| [05:38] | I’m sure you do, but you never write, | 你当然需要了 但你从来不写信 |
| [05:41] | you never call, you’re critical of my life choices. | 不打电话 还对我的生活方式指手画脚 |
| [05:44] | You were a bad guy, Mom, an outlaw. | 老妈 你是个坏人 法外之徒 |
| [05:46] | What, are you still mad about me not going | 你还在气我没去你的 |
| [05:48] | to your sheriff graduation? | 警官毕业典礼吗 |
| [05:49] | Is that what this is about? | 就因为这个吗 |
| [05:50] | I told you 100 times, I had business! | 我跟你说过无数次了 老娘很忙 |
| [05:54] | – You were in jail! – In jail on business! | -你在监狱里 -在监狱里忙 |
| [05:57] | Lies! | 骗人 |
| [05:57] | Plus, I tried to break out, okay? | 而且 我试过越狱 好吗 |
| [06:00] | Gosh. | 老天爷 |
| [06:01] | Anyway, what brings you back home? | 行了 你回来是有什么事 |
| [06:04] | Well, a no-good meanie named Meanie McQueen | 有个叫米妮麦奎因的坏蛋 |
| [06:06] | took my badge and keys and threw all the moms | 抢走了我的警徽和钥匙 |
| [06:08] | in my town in jail. | 还把镇上所有妈妈都关起来了 |
| [06:10] | Now it’s a… town with no moms. | 现在镇子变成了没有妈妈的小镇 |
| [06:13] | Did you tell them in your big sheriff voice | 你有没有用你浑厚的警官声线 |
| [06:15] | that you didn’t like it | 告诉他们 |
| [06:16] | when they threw all the moms in jail? | 你不喜欢妈妈们被关起来 |
| [06:17] | I think so. | 应该有吧 |
| [06:18] | Well, then, sounds like you need a little help. | 那看来你需要一点帮助 |
| [06:21] | Let’s do this. | 来吧 |
| [06:26] | Guess what, Meanie McQueen? | 米妮麦奎因 |
| [06:28] | I told my mom on you. | 我向我妈妈告状了 |
| [06:33] | The mom of the sheriff is an ex-outlaw. | 警长的妈妈以前是逃犯 |
| [06:36] | I love it. | 我喜欢 |
| [06:37] | And you’re telling the story so well. | 你故事讲得太好了 |
| [06:40] | And back to the story. We’re gonna get sick. | 继续讲故事吧 我们都快病了 |
| [06:42] | The sheriff and his tough mom | 警长和他狂野的老妈 |
| [06:43] | toughly walked in, looking tough. | 狂野地走了进去 表情很狂野 |
| [06:46] | You brought your mommy. | 你把你妈咪带来了啊 |
| [06:48] | That’s right. Did I stutter? | 没错 我结巴了吗 |
| [06:50] | Because sometimes I stutter, | 我有时候会结巴 |
| [06:52] | but I feel like I got that out pretty clearly. | 但我觉得这次我表达得很清晰 |
| [06:55] | Ask the jailhouse full of moms if I’m scared of moms. | 问问那一监狱的老妈 我怕没怕过她们 |
| [06:58] | And then ask them if they like mom jeans | 再问问她们喜不喜欢 |
| [07:00] | that were invented recently. | 最近刚面世的妈妈裤 |
| [07:02] | Listen, I don’t like the way you’re treating my boy. | 听着 我不喜欢你对我儿子做的事 |
| [07:05] | And you’re gonna knock it off. | 请你给我打住 |
| [07:06] | Let me tell you what I’m gonna knock off. | 我来告诉你我要打什么 |
| [07:08] | I’m gonna knock off this glass. | 我要打碎这个杯子 |
| [07:10] | Oh, dear. | 天哪 |
| [07:11] | And then I’m gonna knock that attitude | 再打碎你那趾高气昂 |
| [07:13] | right off of your face. | 的态度 |
| [07:16] | I’d like to see you try. | 放马过来啊 |
| [07:17] | Taking care of you is gonna be a snap. | 解决你 小菜一碟 |
| [07:21] | That sounds like a stretch. | 听起来很费劲啊 |
| [07:24] | Whoa, this is getting tense. | 好紧张 |
| [07:27] | Rubber bands? What’s with the rubber bands? | 橡皮筋 橡皮筋是怎么回事 |
| [07:30] | What’s wrong with rubber bands? | 橡皮筋怎么了 |
| [07:31] | Nothing. Go on. | 没什么 继续 |
| [07:32] | They faced off, face-to-face. | 他们面对面地对峙 |
| [07:35] | I’m gonna give you till the count of three | 我数三下 |
| [07:37] | to get out of town on your own. | 你们自己滚出小镇 |
| [07:38] | And I’m not gonna do that thing | 我保证 我不会 |
| [07:39] | where I fling my rubber band | 数到一就开始 |
| [07:40] | after I only count to one. | 弹橡皮筋 |
| [07:42] | Oh, my gosh, that’s super nice of you. | 我的天 你人真是太好了 |
| [07:43] | – Okay, then, one… – I’m doing that thing! | -好的那就 一 -我要弹了 |
| [07:46] | Get ’em! | 打他们 |
| [07:49] | What do we do? | 我们怎么办 |
| [07:50] | They got us pinned down. | 我们被压制住了 |
| [07:51] | Son, I’m like a starched collar. | 儿子 你老妈就是上浆的衣领 |
| [07:53] | I’m never pinned down. | 永远不会被压倒 |
| [07:56] | I’m hit! | 我被打中了 |
| [07:59] | – Fling! Fling! Fling! Fling! Fling! – Move it! | -弹 弹 弹 弹啊 -快走 |
| [08:01] | Go, go, go, go, go! Go! | 跑 跑 跑 快跑 |
| [08:04] | You got the angle, son. | 你的机会来了 儿子 |
| [08:05] | Here it goes. | 来了 |
| [08:08] | My beautiful knee! | 我美丽的膝盖 |
| [08:11] | Is it safe for a kid to fall off | 一个孩子这样从二楼阳台上 |
| [08:12] | a second-floor balcony like that? | 跌下来是安全的吗 |
| [08:14] | It’s fine. Millie trained for weeks for that fall. | 没事 米莉练了好几个星期 |
| [08:17] | Yeah, she’s Jessica Alba’s stunt double. | 对的 她是杰西卡·阿尔芭的替身 |
| [08:19] | All right, Meanie. We’ve got you outnumbered. | 好了米妮 你现在寡不敌众 |
| [08:22] | – Okay, I give up! – Really? | -好吧 我投降 -真的吗 |
| [08:24] | Yeah, I know when I’m beat. | 对 输没输我自己最清楚 |
| [08:25] | Just gonna get a quick sarsaparilla for the road. | 只想上路前快速地来杯菝葜啤酒 |
| [08:27] | Make it real quick. | 赶紧的 |
| [08:29] | Oh, I will. | 我会的 |
| [08:30] | Fling! | 我弹 |
| [08:33] | You jerks. | 混蛋 |
| [08:35] | Hey, can I get my badge and key back? | 能把徽章和钥匙还给我吗 |
| [08:37] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [08:38] | Mom, you got Meanie. | 妈妈 你打败了米妮 |
| [08:39] | You fought my battles for me. | 你为我打了一场胜仗 |
| [08:42] | Mom? | 妈妈 |
| [08:43] | Mom? | 妈妈 |
| [08:44] | No! | 不要啊 |
| [08:45] | She got me, Rudy. | 她打中我了 鲁迪 |
| [08:47] | She got me right in the gut. | 刚好打到肚子上 |
| [08:48] | But | 可是 |
| [08:49] | I think this is it for me. | 我想我可能不行了 |
| [08:51] | But, no. | 但 不要啊 |
| [08:52] | Damn these rubber bands. | 这些臭橡皮筋 |
| [08:54] | Damn them to hell! | 咒它们下地狱 |
| [08:55] | What will I do without you? | 没有你我怎么办 |
| [08:57] | Oh, Rudy. | 鲁迪 |
| [08:58] | You’ll live. | 你会活下去的 |
| [09:00] | ‘Cause I raised you to live. | 因为我把你养大就是让你活下去 |
| [09:03] | Always remember how great your mom was. | 要永远记得你妈妈曾经有多伟大 |
| [09:06] | And always remember to breathe harder than others. | 要永远记得比别人更用力地去呼吸 |
| [09:10] | Adios, much… | 永别了 |
| [09:13] | chacho. | 孩子 |
| [09:15] | She’s got asthma, too. | 她也有哮喘 |
| [09:23] | The town with no moms was gonna have | 没有妈妈的小镇 |
| [09:25] | to go by a different name. | 最终换了名字 |
| [09:27] | Because of one mom, who saved all the moms, | 因为一位母亲拯救了所有母亲 |
| [09:30] | they named it Momtown. | 这个小镇后来叫妈妈镇 |
| [09:33] | Momtown. | 妈妈镇 |
| [09:34] | What a tearjerker. | 真是太催人泪下了 |
| [09:36] | I know. You can see why I haven’t | 我知道 你知道为什么 |
| [09:38] | been doing my homework lately. | 我最近都没有做作业了吧 |
| [09:39] | I’ve been so focused on that play. | 我太专注在那部剧上了 |
| [09:42] | It was very impressive to see, in person. | 亲自看真的很令人难忘啊 |
| [09:45] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [09:48] | Tina, what’d your class do? | 蒂娜 你们班表演了什么 |
| [09:50] | It’s all so fresh, | 一切如此清晰 |
| [09:51] | I’m still kind of remembering what we did. | 我还在回味中 |
| [09:53] | But Gene’s got that “Let me go next” Face. | 但吉恩一脸”下一个我来”的表情 |
| [09:55] | Do I? | 我有吗 |
| [09:56] | You definitely do, Gene. | 你绝对有 吉恩 |
| [09:57] | We did kind of a skit song with xylophones and clouds. | 我们表演了歌剧 有木琴有云彩 |
| [10:02] | It was called “Eternally Maternal.” | 叫”不朽的母爱” |
| [10:05] | A skit song. | 歌剧 |
| [10:06] | I was completely in sync with everyone else, | 先声明一下 |
| [10:08] | in case you were wondering. | 我和其他人完全在一个拍子上 |
| [10:10] | Sure. | 当然 |
| [10:11] | I played a god named Yingo. | 我演的是一个叫银戈的神 |
| [10:13] | My brothers Yango and Yongo and I | 我的兄弟阳戈 永戈和我 |
| [10:16] | created the universe and everything in it. | 创造了宇宙和万物 |
| [10:18] | We made clouds, TV, breadsticks, | 我们创造了云彩 电视 长棍面包 |
| [10:20] | unlimited breadsticks. | 无限供应的长棍面包 |
| [10:22] | We had it good, real good. | 我们做的很好 真的很好 |
| [10:24] | Hey, check out what I made with the Staff of Creation. | 看看我用造物棒做了啥 |
| [10:26] | A banana-ffalo. | 香蕉牛 |
| [10:27] | It’s half banana, half buffalo. | 一半香蕉 一半水牛 |
| [10:30] | Wait, what mythology is this? | 等等 这是什么神话 |
| [10:32] | It’s kind of a mishmash. | 有点大杂烩的意思 |
| [10:33] | Greek, Roman, Pokemon, Tex-Mex, you know. | 希腊 罗马 美墨 神奇宝贝什么的 |
| [10:36] | Sure, sure. | 当然 当然 |
| [10:37] | Anyway. | 总之 |
| [10:39] | Boy, do we have it good, except… | 我们真的做得很好 只是 |
| [10:41] | *Sometimes I feel really under-snuggled * | *有时候我会非常渴望拥抱* |
| [10:45] | *Under-snuggled* | *渴望拥抱* |
| [10:47] | *What if we could be snuggled often * | *如果有个人可以经常抱抱我们* |
| [10:49] | *By someone that’s really soft and… * | *这个人要很轻柔 很* |
| [10:52] | – Gentle? – Gentle? | -温和 -温和 |
| [10:53] | We could call her Mombo. | 我们可以叫她妈妈抱 |
| [10:56] | Or Mom for short? | 或简称妈妈 |
| [10:57] | *And she could kiss our god-ouchies all better * | *她可以给我们呼呼* |
| [11:01] | *And she’d smell just like you remember* | *她的味道一如记忆之初* |
| [11:04] | *Yeah* | *没错* |
| [11:05] | *And stop us from watching too much TV* | *她会阻止我们沉溺于电视* |
| [11:08] | Wait, what? | 等等 什么 |
| [11:09] | Yeah. We need, healthy limits. | 我们需要有益的限制 |
| [11:11] | Hey, Yingo. Let me see | 银戈 让我看一下 |
| [11:12] | that Staff of Creation real quick. No reason. | 造物棒 就看看 |
| [11:15] | Oh, okay, sure. | 好的 没问题 |
| [11:18] | You’re never creating a mom. | 我永远不会让你造出妈妈这种生物 |
| [11:19] | Hey, give it back. | 还给我 |
| [11:20] | No. | 不给 |
| [11:22] | And they played Keep Away over the audience | 于是他们就在观众头顶上玩起了抛接球游戏 |
| [11:24] | and people went crazy. | 大家都看呆了 |
| [11:25] | I’m throwing this across the universe. | 我要把这个扔到宇宙那头 |
| [11:29] | No! | 不要 |
| [11:32] | Oh, that Yango and Yongo. | 这个阳戈和永戈 |
| [11:34] | Why don’t they want a mom? | 他们为什么不想要一个妈妈 |
| [11:35] | – Little punks. – I know. | -两个小阿飞 -就是说啊 |
| [11:36] | Yingo’s pretty great, though, right? | 但银戈就很好对吧 |
| [11:38] | Gene, go on with your incredibly accurate accounting | 吉恩 继续 一字不差地讲讲 |
| [11:41] | of what happened earlier tonight. | 你们今晚在学校都演了什么 |
| [11:42] | I will. There I was, | 我会的 就这样 |
| [11:44] | searching the universe for the Staff of Creation. | 我在宇宙中搜寻着造物棒 |
| [11:48] | Why did I have to make the universe so huge? | 我为什么要把宇宙造的这么大呢 |
| [11:50] | I can’t find anything. | 我什么都找不到 |
| [11:52] | I want that staff. | 我想要造物棒 |
| [11:53] | I want to have someone like a mom. | 我想要造像妈妈一样的人类 |
| [11:55] | You mean like me? | 你的意思是像我一样 |
| [11:59] | Wait, how’d you create her without the Staff of Creation? | 等等 没有造物棒她怎么造出来的 |
| [12:02] | I didn’t. She’s a vision. | 我没有 她是个幻象 |
| [12:04] | Ooh, vision. | 幻象 |
| [12:05] | But if I was real, | 但如果我是真的 |
| [12:07] | here’s what I might be like. | 我可能是这样的 |
| [12:09] | *I’d live on a diet of wine and cheese* | *我会喝酒吃奶酪* |
| [12:12] | *You’d teach me to say thank you and also please* | *你会教我说谢谢和请* |
| [12:15] | Manners are important. | 礼节很重要 |
| [12:17] | *If you don’t have a date, I’ll go with you to prom* | *如果你没有伴 我会陪你去舞会* |
| [12:20] | *Oh, I sure would like to have someone like a mom* | *我肯定会喜欢妈妈这样的人的* |
| [12:23] | *I’d do your homework when you don’t wanna* | *你不想做作业的时候我会帮你做* |
| [12:26] | *You’d let me get a big iguana* | *你会让我养只大鬣蜥蜴* |
| [12:29] | *As long as you take care of it* | *只要你能自己照顾它* |
| [12:30] | *I’ll make you watch all my favorite Rom-come* | *我会让你看所有我最爱的浪漫剧* |
| [12:35] | *Oh, I sure would like* | *我肯定会喜欢* |
| [12:37] | *to have someone like a mom* | *像妈妈这样的人* |
| [12:39] | Mombo, you’re fading. | 妈妈 你在消失 |
| [12:42] | Because I’m not real. | 因为我不是真的 |
| [12:43] | I’m just a vision. | 我只是个幻象 |
| [12:45] | Vision, vision. | 幻象 幻象 |
| [12:46] | I need that Staff of Creation! | 我需要造物棒 |
| [12:48] | You don’t need the staff. | 你不需要造物棒 |
| [12:50] | You just need to believe. | 你只需要去相信 |
| [12:52] | If you believe, | 如果你相信 |
| [12:53] | put your hand under your armpit and squeeze. | 把手放到咯吱窝下挤一挤 |
| [12:57] | It makes a funny sound. | 会发出好笑的声音 |
| [12:58] | That’s the sound of believing. | 那就是信仰的声音 |
| [13:01] | Everyone, believe with me. | 各位 和我一起相信自己 |
| [13:06] | There was thunder and lightning | 接着是一阵雷鸣和闪电 |
| [13:08] | and crashing cymbals. | 猛烈的钗钹敲击声 |
| [13:10] | And steel drums, I want to say. | 还有钢鼓 |
| [13:12] | And Mombo became real. | 妈妈就真的出现了 |
| [13:13] | And everyone was dancing on the ceiling, | 大家都在天花板上跳起了舞 |
| [13:15] | and this was way before Lionel Richie. | 这可比莱昂纳尔·里奇早多了 |
| [13:18] | I’m real. | 我变成真的了 |
| [13:19] | This is amazing. | 太棒了 |
| [13:21] | I’m so much better than a dad. | 我比爸爸好多了 |
| [13:23] | What’s a dad? | 爸爸是什么 |
| [13:24] | Oh, let me tell you about dads. | 听我跟你细细道来 |
| [13:26] | They’re hairy, they’ve got no rhythm, | 他们毛发多 没有乐感 |
| [13:28] | they can’t tape a school play to save their lives, | 事关性命却仍录不好学校演出 |
| [13:31] | they smell weird, their knees are backwards… | 有体味 膝盖往后长 |
| [13:33] | Okay, Gene, we get it. | 好了吉恩 我懂了 |
| [13:37] | Oh, that’s catchy. | 很朗朗上口啊 |
| [13:38] | And the production sounds impressive. | 感觉制作也很用心啊 |
| [13:40] | All those wires. | 那么多威亚 |
| [13:41] | Yeah, that’s the crew kids. | 那些是充当幕后人员的学生控制的 |
| [13:43] | They don’t want speaking roles. | 他们不想扮演有台词的角色 |
| [13:44] | They express themselves through pulleys. | 就通过控制威亚表现自己 |
| [13:46] | Okay, I think I’m ready to remember what my class did. | 好了 我想起自己班表演了啥了 |
| [13:49] | All right. | 好的 |
| [13:51] | We did a little play called “Moms Are out of This World”. | 我们演了一出叫”妈妈在外太空”的短剧 |
| [13:54] | It took place out of this world. | 故事发生在外太空 |
| [13:56] | I played a tough lady named Sigourney, | 我演的是一个叫西戈尼的女强人 |
| [13:58] | with a complicated backstory and a great jumpsuit. | 背景复杂 穿一套很好的连身衣 |
| [14:00] | I was on a mission with a couple spunky space marines | 我和一对勇敢的星际战士在执行任务 |
| [14:03] | to wipe out an incredibly dangerous alien species | 目的是消灭一种特别危险的外星人物种 |
| [14:05] | that had a thing for jumping out of people’s chests. | 他们喜欢从人的胸口跳出来 |
| [14:08] | – Yuck. – I know, right? | -恶心 -对吧 我懂的 |
| [14:09] | In order to exterminate the aliens, | 为了消灭外星人 |
| [14:11] | we have to take out their queen. | 我们得拿下他们的女王 |
| [14:12] | Which won’t be easy. | 这可不容易 |
| [14:13] | Yeah, it will, ’cause we got the guts. | 我们可以的 因为我们有胆 |
| [14:15] | And we got the tools. Ha! Come on. | 我们还有武器 来吧 |
| [14:17] | Yeah, take that, alien. | 受我一击 外星人 |
| [14:19] | We’ll need to be careful and brave, | 我们要谨慎 大胆 |
| [14:21] | because this alien is super tough. | 因为外星人很强大 |
| [14:23] | It’s got acid for blood, | 他们血液里有酸 |
| [14:24] | so it can hurt you even after you’ve killed it. | 就算你已经把它杀死 它还是能伤害你 |
| [14:26] | – Which is annoying. – Like stepping on a dead bee. | -这一点很让人恼火 -就像踩到死蜜蜂 |
| [14:28] | Y’all ever done that? One time… | 你们试过吗 我有一次 |
| [14:30] | But before they entered into the fight of their lives, | 但在他们为自己的生命而战之前 |
| [14:32] | they had to do something real quick. | 还有一件小事需要完成 |
| [14:33] | … that stinger’s about four inches long. | 那跟刺得有四英寸长 |
| [14:35] | We could trip over these space crates. | 这些太空箱很碍事 |
| [14:37] | I’d better move ’em. | 我最好把它们移开 |
| [14:37] | Let me just strap into this super strong, | 我先穿上这套超级坚固 |
| [14:39] | robotic exoskeleton loader. | 的机械骨骼装备 |
| [14:41] | Hold on a second. | 等我一下 |
| [14:42] | Yeah, sure. | 好吧 |
| [14:44] | Maybe this will come back later. Who knows? | 也许待会儿可以给它弄回来 谁知道呢 |
| [14:46] | Robotic loader? | 机械装备 |
| [14:48] | Flamethrowers? | 火焰喷射器 |
| [14:49] | What kind of budget did you have for these plays? | 你们是给这些剧拿到了多少预算啊 |
| [14:52] | I think it was about $50,000. | 大概五万块吧 |
| [14:53] | They fired a gym teacher. | 学校解雇了一名体育老师 |
| [14:55] | And we had a bake sale. | 再加上烘培义卖的钱 |
| [14:56] | Okay. Let’s get this mother. | 好了 咱们去会会这位母亲吧 |
| [14:59] | Also, I forgot to tell you. | 对了 忘了告诉你们 |
| [15:01] | There are reports of scientific anomalies on this planet. | 有报告说这颗星球上有科学异常现象 |
| [15:04] | – A-Anomalies? – Yeah. Scientific ones. | -异常现象 -对 科学异常现象 |
| [15:07] | Because of the, | 因为 |
| [15:09] | terraforming… station. | 地球化…空间站的关系 |
| [15:11] | And the hyper unit something. | 以及超单元的什么东西 |
| [15:13] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [15:14] | What are these things? Space tulips? | 那些是什么 太空郁金香吗 |
| [15:16] | Negative. Those are pods. | 错 是孵化舱 |
| [15:17] | With alien babies in ’em. | 里面有外星人宝宝 |
| [15:19] | We have to take out the alien queen mom, | 我们必须除掉母亲外星人女王 |
| [15:20] | if we can figure out where she is. | 但先得知道她在哪儿 |
| [15:23] | Oh, there she is. | 哦 在那儿 |
| [15:25] | Game over, man. Game over. | 死定了 死定了 |
| [15:29] | This was a big moment | 这一幕很精彩 |
| [15:30] | when we revealed the alien queen costume/puppet. | 我们揭晓了外星人女王的造型 |
| [15:32] | There were a lot of kids working behind the scenes | 好多学生在幕后操纵 |
| [15:34] | to make this thing look like an egg-laying monster. | 为了让它看起来像一只会下蛋的怪兽 |
| [15:37] | Some parents screamed. | 有几个父母发出了尖叫声 |
| [15:38] | One lady fainted. | 有位女士还昏倒了 |
| [15:39] | Dad, talking about you. | 说你呢老爸 |
| [15:41] | Damn it! How am I supposed to kill you | 该死 如果这些训练有素的太空陆战队 |
| [15:42] | when these trained space marines couldn’t? | 都拿你没辙 那我要怎么除掉你 |
| [15:43] | – You’re so strong. – Whatever. | -你这么强大 -那有什么 |
| [15:45] | How am I supposed to not be killed by you | 你有火焰喷射器和先进的科技 |
| [15:48] | with your flamethrower and your advanced technology? | 我要怎么才能不被你除掉 |
| [15:51] | You’re so smart. | 你这么聪明 |
| [15:52] | What? That’s crazy. | 什么 怎么可能 |
| [15:53] | You’re the perfect organism. | 你拥有完美的机体 |
| [15:55] | You have it so much easier than me. | 你的处境比我强多了 |
| [15:58] | I have slimy hands and two weird mouths. | 我有一双黏湿的手和两张奇怪的嘴 |
| [16:00] | Your hands are only a little slimy | 你的手只是有点黏 |
| [16:02] | and you came here on a spaceship. | 你还是坐太空船来的 |
| [16:03] | You have it easier than me. | 你才比我强好吗 |
| [16:05] | I wish I could be you for a day. | 真希望我能做一天你 |
| [16:08] | And then we switched bodies. | 然后我们就互换了身体 |
| [16:10] | I mean, you know, we switched costumes. | 当然 实际上是互换了服装 |
| [16:12] | But the idea was, we switched bodies. | 但演的是互换了身体 |
| [16:14] | We body-switched! | 我们的身体交换了 |
| [16:15] | The anomaly. | 异常现象 |
| [16:16] | Wait, what? | 啥 |
| [16:18] | The scientific anomaly. | 科学异常现象 |
| [16:19] | Because of the terraforming… | 因为地球化 |
| [16:21] | – hyper unit something. – Whatever. | -超单元什么的 -随便吧 |
| [16:23] | Hey, check out my hair when I run. | 看我跑步时头发飘扬的样子 |
| [16:27] | I thought this was Alien. | 不是讲外星人的吗 |
| [16:28] | Now it’s a body-switching story? | 怎么成互换身体了 |
| [16:30] | It’s Freaky Friday-liens. | 是《辣妈辣妹》加《异形》 |
| [16:32] | I remember all of this. | 你说的这些我都有印象 |
| [16:34] | Me, too. But, what happens again? | 我也是 不过后来怎么样了 |
| [16:35] | Tina, go on, go on. | 继续讲 继续将蒂娜 |
| [16:37] | I was the queen, and I decided to take | 我成了女王 我决定 |
| [16:39] | my new body out for a spin. | 试试我的新身体 |
| [16:40] | I jumped. I whipped my tail around. | 我跳了一跳 甩了甩尾巴 |
| [16:42] | I climbed a wall. | 还爬了墙 |
| [16:43] | The big three. | 传说中的三大动作 |
| [16:46] | Super cool. | 非常酷 |
| [16:50] | Oh, a baby. Right. | 宝宝 对 |
| [16:51] | I’m totally a mom. | 我成妈妈了 |
| [16:54] | Look at you. | 看看你 |
| [16:55] | You probably want a host body to suck the life out of. | 肯定很想寄宿在某个身体里吸食它的生命力 |
| [16:58] | Shush. | 嘘 |
| [17:00] | Don’t shush me. | 别嘘我 |
| [17:01] | Okay. I’m going to put you back | 好吧 我把你放回 |
| [17:03] | in your egg-a-majig. | 你的蛋壳里去 |
| [17:06] | Oh, more babies. I have so many babies. | 还有更多宝宝 我有好多宝宝 |
| [17:09] | I don’t know how to take care of all these babies. | 我不知道要怎么照顾这么多宝宝 |
| [17:12] | Mommy’s gonna be back in just a sec. | 妈妈马上回来 |
| [17:16] | – Man, that alien sure was tough. – I know. | -天 那外星人可真可怕 -是吧 |
| [17:19] | – And so totally smoking hot. – Do what? | -我超辣的 -你说啥 |
| [17:23] | Yeah, I wouldn’t say it was hot. | 对 我不会觉得她辣 |
| [17:24] | I mean, it wasn’t ugly, but… | 虽然也不算丑 |
| [17:26] | Yeah, it was ugly. It was a monster. | 咋不丑 就是个怪兽 |
| [17:28] | That seems closed-minded. | 是你思想太保守了 |
| [17:30] | Sigourney, you’re acting weird. | 西戈尼 你好奇怪 |
| [17:32] | Weird like cool weird? | 很酷的那种奇怪吗 |
| [17:34] | Like I just got a lot cooler recently? | 意思是我最近变酷了吗 |
| [17:38] | Can I talk with you real quick? | 我能跟你聊几句吗 |
| [17:40] | Back in a sec, guys. | 等我一下 两位 |
| [17:41] | I just got to go, stretch my human legs out. | 我去 拉伸一下我的人腿 |
| [17:44] | I’ll be right back. | 马上回来 |
| [17:46] | – I want to switch back. – What? Already? | -我想换回来 -什么 这么快 |
| [17:48] | No way. | 不要 |
| [17:49] | Come on. It’s hard being in your body. | 别啊 做你太难了 |
| [17:51] | I’m loving being in your body. | 我觉得做你特别好 |
| [17:53] | It’s so much more compact. | 你的身体紧凑多了 |
| [17:54] | And I love these eye guards. | 我特别喜欢这个眼罩 |
| [17:56] | – I feel like they make me look smart. – but… | -我感觉它能让我看起来更聪明 -可 |
| [17:58] | And human boys, I love them. | 人类男孩我也超爱 |
| [18:00] | They have so few teeth. It’s cute. | 他们牙齿好少 好可爱 |
| [18:02] | Listen, we got to say “I want to switch back” | 我们必须同时说出”我想换回来” |
| [18:04] | at the same time, so the scientific anomaly can happen. | 科学异常现象才会发生 |
| [18:06] | Ready? And… | 准备好了吗 |
| [18:08] | – I want to switch back. – I’m not switching back. | -我想换回来 -我不要换回来 |
| [18:11] | I was afraid of this. | 我怕的就是这个 |
| [18:12] | I’m gonna have to force you to switch back | 我现在要用我的外星人力量 |
| [18:14] | with my alien strength. | 强迫你换回来 |
| [18:17] | And then it was a full-on battle | 接着就上演了一场厮杀 |
| [18:18] | with that loader you might remember from before. | 外星人对战之前提到的机械装备 |
| [18:20] | How do you even use this thing? | 这玩意儿咋用啊 |
| [18:23] | you just hold onto the… | 你得握住 |
| [18:24] | – Never mind, I got it. – Okay, good. | -不用了 我回了 -那就好 |
| [18:29] | So we were fighting. And the audience | 于是我们开打了 观众们都看得 |
| [18:31] | was really into it, and they weren’t just being nice | 津津有味 绝不是因为这是学生演的 |
| [18:33] | ’cause it was a school play. Right, Dad? | 所以给我们面子 对吧老爸 |
| [18:35] | It was… it was… | 那很 那很… |
| [18:37] | It was like Avenue Q meets Caligula | 好比《Q大道》遇上《罗马帝国艳情史》 |
| [18:39] | meets a fight outside of a Dairy Queen. | 外加DQ店外的大战 |
| [18:42] | Yes. Right. E-Exactly. | 对 就是那样 |
| [18:43] | Wait, you saw Caligula? | 等下 你看过《罗马帝国艳情史》 |
| [18:45] | You saw Caligula? | 你看过 |
| [18:46] | Wait, what’s Caligula? | 等下 《罗马帝国艳情史》是啥 |
| [18:47] | Come on, I don’t want to hurt you. | 别这样 我不想伤害你 |
| [18:49] | – Switch back. – No. | -换回来 -不要 |
| [18:54] | I’m never changing back. | 我再也不要换回来 |
| [18:59] | Sweeties? | 宝贝儿们 |
| [19:02] | They need me. | 他们需要我 |
| [19:03] | Okay, let’s switch back. | 好吧 我们换回来 |
| [19:05] | Oh, phew. | 太好了 |
| [19:06] | But after we switch back, | 但换回来以后 |
| [19:07] | my babies will need a host body | 我的宝宝需要一个宿主 |
| [19:08] | to feed off of as a life source. | 为它们提供生命力 |
| [19:10] | Will you be that host body? | 你能当那个宿主吗 |
| [19:12] | Maybe? | 也许吧 |
| [19:13] | I mean, after we switch. | 那也是在换回来之后 |
| [19:14] | Let’s switch first. | 我们先换吧 |
| [19:15] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [19:15] | One, two, three… | 一 二 三 |
| [19:18] | I want to switch back. | 我想换回来 |
| [19:22] | Come here, alien babies. | 快来 我的外星人宝贝儿们 |
| [19:24] | Come to mama. | 快来妈妈这儿 |
| [19:27] | Okay, bye. | 好了 回见 |
| [19:28] | I’ll get back to you about that host body thing. | 我之后再找你商量宿主的事儿 |
| [19:30] | Everyone lived happily ever after. | 之后所有人都过上了幸福的生活 |
| [19:31] | Then the crew kids struck the set real fast | 然后负责幕后的学生很快撤了布景 |
| [19:33] | and that was that. | 就是这样 |
| [19:34] | So, wow. There you have it, Lin. | 就是这样 琳 |
| [19:36] | Pretty much how it went at school. | 几乎再现了当时的情况 |
| [19:38] | You mean exactly much. | 完全再现 |
| [19:40] | Oh, my God. I can’t believe I missed it. | 真不敢相信我居然错过了 |
| [19:43] | If I was as strong as those mothers in your stories, | 如果我和你们故事里的妈妈一样厉害 |
| [19:45] | I would have gone and just sneezed all over | 我肯定会去的 然后打喷嚏 |
| [19:47] | everyone’s dumb faces. | 喷那些二货一脸 |
| [19:49] | What? Mom, you are the mothers in those stories. | 怎么会老妈 你就是我们故事里的妈妈啊 |
| [19:52] | – I am? – Yeah. | -是吗 -是的 |
| [19:53] | You would take a rubber band to the gut for us. | 你就是那种会为我们挡橡皮筋的妈妈 |
| [19:56] | You stand up for us all the time. | 你一直保护着我们 |
| [19:58] | Well, yeah, I guess. | 好像是的 |
| [19:59] | And you’re not a god, but you’re god-like. | 你虽然不是神 但你和神一样 |
| [20:02] | That’s true. | 的确 |
| [20:03] | And you’re a badass protective queen bee alien | 你就是那个全力保护自己宝宝 |
| [20:06] | with acid for blood, right? | 流着酸血的外星人女王对吧 |
| [20:07] | Kinda, yeah, maybe. | 有可能 |
| [20:09] | And you’d forgive your husband | 你会原谅你丈夫 |
| [20:10] | for messing up on some videotaping. | 没能录好录像 |
| [20:12] | Geez, Dad. Got to weasel in, huh? | 我天老爸 一定要这样见缝插针吗 |
| [20:14] | Trying. | 我这不是试试嘛 |
| [20:15] | Get in here. Mother’s Day weekend hug. | 都过来 母情节周末拥抱 |
| [20:18] | I don’t think we should be touching. | 我们好像不该有肢体接触 |
| [20:21] | Hey. The school just sent a link | 学校发了一个今天表演 |
| [20:23] | to a recording of the performance. | 的视频链接 |
| [20:26] | Should we watch it? | 要不要看看 |
| [20:29] | You know what? I don’t want to watch it. | 算了 我不想看 |
| [20:31] | I already know I like your version better. | 不用看我也知道我更喜欢你们复述的版本 |
| [20:33] | Got to say, this was a pretty great Mother’s Day gift. | 我得说 我很喜欢今年的母亲节礼物 |
| [20:37] | What else did you get me? | 你们还给我准备了啥 |
| [20:41] | *Oh, what a feeling* | *感觉真好* |
| [20:44] | *When we’re dancing on the ceiling* | *我们在天花板上舞蹈* |
| [20:48] | *Oh, what a feeling* | *感觉真好* |
| [20:52] | *When we’re dancing on the ceiling* | *我们在天花板上舞蹈* |
| [20:54] | *What is happening here?* | *这里怎么了* |
| [20:58] | *Something’s going on that’s not quite clear* | *有情况 但不知是什么* |
| [21:01] | *Somebody turn on the light* | *谁去开下灯* |
| [21:04] | *We’re gonna have a party* | *我们要开派对狂欢* |
| [21:06] | *It’s starting tonight.* | *就在今晚* |
| [21:10] | Everyone’s upside-down. | 大家都倒过来了 |
| [21:11] | The blood’s rushing to my head. | 我脑充血了 |