| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:22] | Okay. Burn unit, commence. | 挖苦游戏 现在开始 |
| [00:25] | You go first. | 你先来 |
| [00:27] | Oh, I play soccer, ’cause I forgot I have hands. | 我踢足球是因为我忘了我还有手 |
| [00:29] | Burn! | 挖到了 |
| [00:30] | I’m on the news, because I have a huge head. | 我上新闻了 因为我有一颗大脑袋 |
| [00:33] | Burn! | 挖到了 |
| [00:34] | I can’t outrun a lawnmower | 我可跑不过除草机 |
| [00:35] | 杀人 除草 | |
| [00:36] | ’cause my dress is so tight. | 因为我的裙子太紧了 |
| [00:38] | Oh! I’m dead. | 哎呀 我挂了 |
| [00:39] | Burn. | 挖到了 |
| [00:42] | Whoa. It’s Banjo. | 看 演班卓呢 |
| [00:44] | Oh, I’m a cowboy, and I got… | 我是牛仔 我有… |
| [00:45] | Wait, wait, wait… Suspend burn unit. | 等一下 先不玩挖苦游戏了 |
| [00:46] | This is a great movie. | 这部电影很精彩的 |
| [00:48] | It’s a Spaghetti Western, | 是意大利拍的美国西部片 |
| [00:50] | the best one, underappreciated. | 拍得最好的一部 却没几个人赏识 |
| [00:52] | He plays a Banjo. | 他手里总有一把班卓琴 |
| [00:53] | Yeah, I can see that. | 我又不瞎 |
| [00:54] | And they made a whole bunch of these. | 他们做了一大堆班卓琴呢 |
| [00:56] | Dad. Do we have anything bigger than this? | 老爸 家里有比这玩意儿大的东西吗 |
| [00:58] | Oh, Gene, what’d you do? | 吉恩 你要干什么 |
| [01:00] | Nothing, yet. Just planning ahead. | 目前还没打算 未雨绸缪而已 |
| [01:02] | What are you guys watching? | 你俩在看什么 |
| [01:04] | Nothing. Go back to bed. | 没看什么 快回去睡觉 |
| [01:05] | The burn unit is just me and dad. | “挖苦游戏”只有我和老爸才能玩 |
| [01:09] | Whoa! Did he just shoot bullets out of his Banjo? | 子弹是从他的班卓琴里射出来的吗 |
| [01:11] | – Yes. – Damn! | -是啊 -好给力 |
| [01:13] | Oh, you like that, Gene? | 哎呦 你喜欢啊 吉恩 |
| [01:14] | ‘Cause we’re changing the channel. | 可是我们要换台了哦 |
| [01:16] | No, no. Let’s watch it. | 别啊别啊 咱一起看会儿 |
| [01:17] | This is pretty much the beginning. | 这块儿正好是刚开始 |
| [01:19] | – What? – Gene, sit here. – What! | -什么 -吉恩 坐这里 -什么 |
| [01:21] | It’s like pushing a couch off the couch! | 你个死胖子 怎么跟沙发一样难推 |
| [01:27] | Here. Hold my plunger. | 来 拿着我的搋子 |
| [01:32] | We are just so thrilled | 我们真是太激动了 |
| [01:33] | that you chose us to cater the event. | 您选了我们家作为承办晚宴的餐馆 |
| [01:35] | Mom, mom, fill me up. | 老妈 老妈 给我倒上 |
| [01:37] | – I just hope we can live up to last year’s event. – Mom… | -希望我们能够达到去年晚宴的水准 -妈 |
| [01:40] | – That Colleen Caviello, – Mom… | -那个柯琳·卡维罗 -老妈 |
| [01:42] | she really outdid herself, | 她确实办得很出色 |
| [01:43] | and never lets anyone forget about it. | 让人永生难忘呢 |
| [01:45] | Just fill up the little mug. | 给这只小的倒 |
| [01:47] | Right, right, right. | 好好好 |
| [01:49] | Okay, Mr. Frond. | 没问题 福旺德老师 |
| [01:50] | Goodbye. Goodbye. | 再见 再见 |
| [01:52] | So what are we catering? | 我们要准备什么样的食物啊 |
| [01:53] | That sounded promising. | 你都夸下海口了 |
| [01:54] | Oh, it’s a real big deal, Bobby. | 这场晚宴非常重要 鲍鲍 |
| [01:56] | It’s a fund-raiser | 这实际上是给 |
| [01:57] | for Tina’s conflict resolution club. | 蒂娜的”解决冲突俱乐部”募集资金 |
| [01:59] | Colleen Caviello made the food last year. | 柯琳·卡维罗去年负责食品供应 |
| [02:02] | This year she can go… blow a balloon. | 她今年可以负责… 吹气球 |
| [02:04] | Yeah! You’re catering our fund-raiser. | 好耶 你要给我们的募捐晚宴提供食物喽 |
| [02:07] | That’s great. How much does it pay? | 不错嘛 我们能得多少啊 |
| [02:08] | – Nothing. – Nothing? | -一分不得 -一分不得 |
| [02:10] | It’s a benefit, Bobby. | 这是场慈善晚宴 鲍鲍 |
| [02:11] | – It’s a spaghetti dinner. – But we don’t make spaghetti. | -食物以意面为主 -可我们家不做意面 |
| [02:14] | This is school fund-raising, Bob. | 这可是全校募捐晚宴 鲍勃 |
| [02:16] | It’s a pasta game. | 主角一向是意面 |
| [02:17] | You make spaghetti, or you go home. | 要么做意面 要么滚回家 |
| [02:19] | Besides, it’s for a good cause. | 而且 我们这是做好事呢 |
| [02:22] | Oh, yeah… to one-up Colleen Caviello. | 是啊 为了盖过柯琳·卡维罗的风头 |
| [02:24] | That’s a, that’s a great cause. | 的确 的确是件”好事” |
| [02:26] | You weren’t there, Bob! | 你是没看着 鲍勃 |
| [02:27] | You don’t know how awful it was. | 那场面都气死人了 |
| [02:30] | This is delicious. | 真好吃啊 |
| [02:33] | Oh, my God! | 俺滴个神 |
| [02:36] | I love this ziti. | 这通心粉的味道真赞 |
| [02:46] | They love my ziti. | 他们在赞我做的通心粉 |
| [02:52] | And that was the worst day of my life. | 那是我这辈子最悲惨的一天 |
| [02:55] | Anyway, this isn’t about Colleen, | 反正我这么做不是为了跟柯琳攀比 |
| [02:57] | this is about Tina. | 而是为了蒂娜 |
| [02:59] | We’re raising money to buy a bulletproof trash can | 我们正在筹资购买防弹垃圾箱 |
| [03:02] | so gang members can finally throw out their guns. | 这样黑帮分子最后就会缴械投降了 |
| [03:05] | And we’re teaching conflict resolution skills, | 我们俱乐部还教授解决冲突的技巧 |
| [03:07] | you can use in your own lives. | 这个非常实用哦 |
| [03:08] | That’s right, Tina, | 没错 蒂娜 |
| [03:09] | Mr. Frond is running the whole thing. | 福旺德老师管理这个俱乐部 |
| [03:11] | Ugh, Mr. Frond? | 福旺德老师 |
| [03:13] | He’s a tall drink of… annoying. | 他可真是风流… 涕淌 |
| [03:14] | That may be true, | 这话不假 |
| [03:15] | but you’re gonna drink that drink, mister. | 不过你得把他淌出来的鼻涕喝下去 先生 |
| [03:17] | I don’t want to. | 我才不要 |
| [03:18] | I have worked too hard to get us this event, | 我费尽心机弄到手承办这次晚宴的机会 |
| [03:21] | so you’ll be nice to Frond, | 所以你得对福旺德老师友好点 |
| [03:22] | and you’ll make spaghetti and meatballs! | 还得给我做意面和肉丸 |
| [03:24] | -No. -Yes. -No. -Yes. | -不介 -听话 -不介 -听话 |
| [03:25] | Fine, but I’m gonna half-ass it. | 那好吧 可我是不会好好干活滴 |
| [03:28] | Dad, check it out. | 老爸 你快看 |
| [03:29] | Little princess guitar. | 小公主吉他 |
| [03:30] | Gene, that’s mine! | 吉恩 那是我的 |
| [03:32] | You never use it. | 你从来都没用过 |
| [03:33] | I’m like Banjo. | 我就像那班卓 |
| [03:34] | What’s the bad guy’s name? | 那个坏蛋叫啥来着 |
| [03:36] | – Ceviche. – Ceviche, yeah. | -瑟维奇 -瑟维奇 没错 |
| [03:38] | He reminds me of this kid at school, Choo-Choo. | 他让我想起一个同学 楚楚 |
| [03:41] | – Choo-Choo? – Yeah. He’s kind of my Nemesis. | -楚楚 -没错 算是我的死对头吧 |
| [03:43] | If I’m telling a joke, | 如果我在讲笑话 |
| [03:44] | he’ll say the punch line before I do. | 他就会提前把笑点爆出来 |
| [03:47] | A vampire walks into a bar and says, | 一个吸血鬼走进酒吧 说 |
| [03:49] | – I’ll have a… – I’ll have a blood lite. | -给我来杯 -给我来杯”淡血” |
| [03:51] | What do you call a Spanish guy | 有个西佬长了一只橡皮脚趾 |
| [03:53] | with a rubber toe? | 你要叫他什么 |
| [03:54] | – Roberto! – Rober… | -罗伯托 -罗伯 |
| [03:57] | What kind of bees make milk? | 什么蜜蜂会产奶 |
| [03:59] | – Boo-bees! – Boo-bees! | -初母峰 -初母峰 |
| [04:01] | So, I’m gonna use this guitar | 所以 我要用这把吉他 |
| [04:04] | to stand up to Choo-Choo like Banjo. | 去回击楚楚 就想班卓那样 |
| [04:07] | That’s, uh… that’s great, Gene. | 很… 很不错嘛 吉恩 |
| [04:08] | But I think your face is wrong. | 但是我觉得你的表情不对劲 |
| [04:10] | My face is wrong?! | 我的表情不对劲 |
| [04:12] | Yeah, you should do the Banjo icy stare. | 你应该使出班卓那冰冷犀利的眼神 |
| [04:14] | Like this? | 像这样吗 |
| [04:17] | No. Not like that. | 不 不对 |
| [04:19] | No, no, no. | 不不不 |
| [04:20] | Don’t growl. That… | 别学狗叫 |
| [04:22] | Like this? | 是这样吗 |
| [04:23] | Maybe try that. | 这个倒可以试试 |
| [04:25] | Is Choo-Choo scared of stroke victims? | 楚楚害怕中风病人吗 |
| [04:27] | Terrified. | 害怕极了 |
| [04:31] | Hey, Gene, Gene. | 吉恩 吉恩 |
| [04:32] | How do you plead? | 你有什么好辩解的 |
| [04:33] | I’m innocent. | 我是无辜的 |
| [04:35] | Your fingerprints were all over the murder weapon. | 凶器上全都是你的指纹 |
| [04:38] | I don’t have fingers. | 可我没有手指 |
| [04:39] | Your honor! | 法官大人 |
| [04:41] | I don’t have time for this. | 我没时间瞎胡闹 |
| [04:42] | What?! You don’t have time for food court? | 什么 你没时间玩”食物法庭” |
| [04:44] | Where are you going? | 你要去哪里 |
| [04:46] | Hey. Wanna hear a good one? | 来听听极品段子 |
| [04:49] | What’s green and sings? | 什么东西绿颜色 会唱歌 |
| [04:51] | – Go ahead. Do it. – El… | -来啊 说啊 -埃… |
| [04:55] | Elvis… | 埃尔维斯… |
| [04:57] | Elvis Par… | 埃尔维斯·帕… |
| [04:59] | Forget it. | 我不玩了 |
| [05:01] | I’ll tell you what’s green and sings… | 我来告诉你什么东西绿颜色会唱歌 |
| [05:03] | Elvis Parsley. | 埃尔维斯·帕斯利 |
| [05:03] | 冷笑话: 把猫王Elvis Presley的姓氏换成Parsley(香菜) 就变成了”会唱歌的香菜”了 (￣▽￣”) | |
| [05:07] | You don’t say the punch lines to other people’s jokes anymore. | 不许你再抖别人段子的包袱 |
| [05:11] | You got that, Poo-Poo? | 给我记住喽 便便 |
| [05:14] | What the hell? | 这他妈怎么回事 |
| [05:15] | Thank you. Thank you. | 多谢 多谢 |
| [05:17] | Thank you, everyone. Thank you. | 多谢各位捧场 多谢 |
| [05:18] | Anyway… Gene, look. | 好了 吉恩 来看 |
| [05:20] | They’re about to announce the verdict. | 法庭就要做出最后判决了 |
| [05:21] | Guilty. | 罪名成立 |
| [05:22] | No! | 不 |
| [05:24] | Take him away. | 把他带下去 |
| [05:25] | Gene, where are you going? | 吉恩 你要去哪 |
| [05:27] | What’s up with Gene? | 吉恩怎么了 |
| [05:29] | I don’t know, Lasagna. | 我不知道 千层面 |
| [05:30] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [05:32] | You know, cooking spaghetti isn’t even cooking. | 知道吗 煮意面根本算不上是煮食物 |
| [05:35] | It’s just, like, boiling water. | 充其量是在烧开水 |
| [05:36] | Hey, Bobby, can I come to this thing? | 老鲍 晚宴我能参加吗 |
| [05:38] | Uh, I don’t think so. | 我看不妥吧 |
| [05:38] | Why not? | 怎么不妥了 |
| [05:39] | Some of these moms are divorced, right? | 这里有些妈妈已经离婚了 对吧 |
| [05:41] | They meet me, | 她们认识认识我 |
| [05:42] | I meet their kids. | 我再认识认识她们的孩子 |
| [05:44] | Maybe throw the ball around. | 也许还会传几个球玩玩 |
| [05:45] | Not inside, but… | 不是里面的那个球 是… |
| [05:46] | Uh, we agreed | 我们说好的 |
| [05:47] | no more school events for you, Teddy. | 不许你再参加学校活动 泰迪 |
| [05:49] | – Hey, dad. Guess what? – What? | -老爸 你猜怎么着 -怎么着 |
| [05:50] | I acted like Banjo and took Choo-Choo down. | 我像班卓一样 把楚楚打得落花流水 |
| [05:53] | Everyone laughed. | 所有人都笑了 |
| [05:55] | Well, one kid laughed. | 什么呀 就一个人笑了 |
| [05:56] | Peter Pescadero. | 彼得·派斯卡德罗 |
| [05:57] | He has a learning disability. | 还是个智障 |
| [05:59] | Yeah, but he knows what’s funny. | 没错 但是他懂我的笑点 |
| [06:01] | Now that you stood up for yourself, | 既然你已经出了这口恶气 |
| [06:03] | oh, congratulations, Gene… | 那就恭喜你一下 吉恩 |
| [06:05] | can we stop talking about it? | 这事就此打住成吗 |
| [06:07] | Okay, tonight, I propose, | 好了老爸 我提议 今晚 |
| [06:09] | dad, that after everyone else goes to bed, Gene… | 等其他人都睡下后 尤其是吉恩 |
| [06:14] | we fire up the burn unit | 我们就开始玩挖苦游戏 |
| [06:15] | and we watch Canine Criminals, | 然后看《狗狗犯罪团》 |
| [06:17] | and then that stretching show, | 然后看柔术表演 |
| [06:19] | and then maybe a little Beetlejuice in Espanol. | 也许再看会儿西语配音的《甲壳虫汁》 |
| [06:23] | Beetlejugo. Beetlejugo. Beetlejugo. | 甲壳虫汁 甲壳虫汁 甲壳虫汁 |
| [06:27] | I would, | 我也很想这样玩 |
| [06:28] | except a certain best dad in the world | 但是你这宇宙超级无敌模范好老爸 |
| [06:30] | went out and got this! | 今儿买了这个回来 |
| [06:32] | It’s the complete Banjo box set! | 班卓系列全集 |
| [06:35] | All 12 DVDs | 十二张影碟 |
| [06:36] | and over 28 hours of extras. | 外加超过二十八小时的特别收录 |
| [06:40] | 28 hours?! | 二十八小时 |
| [06:42] | Dad, can I… see that fork for a minute? | 老爸 那把叉子能给我看看吗 |
| [06:44] | Um… here. | 给 |
| [06:45] | Thank you. And I just want to… | 谢了 我只是想… |
| [06:51] | No! | 不 |
| [06:56] | Best part right here, Gene. | 马上就是最精彩的部分了 吉恩 |
| [06:58] | There’s only gonna be two shots, | 我的手指就动两下 |
| [07:00] | me shooting you, | 第一下干掉你 |
| [07:01] | and then me drinking this shot of whiskey. | 第二下干掉这杯威士忌 |
| [07:04] | Wow. Oh, what a line. | 这台词太妙了 |
| [07:07] | Go ahead, watch your stupid movie. | 看吧看吧 尽情看你们的傻缺电影吧 |
| [07:09] | There are other people for me to hang out with around here. | 这儿又不是没有人跟我玩 |
| [07:12] | Tina, get up. Let’s hang out. | 蒂娜 起来 我们去玩吧 |
| [07:15] | Okay. Maybe we can practice conflict resolution. | 好啊 我们可以练习一下解决冲突的方法 |
| [07:18] | Say something mean to me so I can not react. | 对我说些刻薄话 让我练习练习保持冷静 |
| [07:20] | Anything I want? | 说什么都行吗 |
| [07:21] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [07:22] | Well, uh, your room looks like | 你的房间看起来 |
| [07:25] | it was decorated by a perverted jockey. | 像是变态赛马师装饰的 |
| [07:28] | When you say that, | 你这样说的时候 |
| [07:29] | what I feel is that you’re trying to hurt my feelings. | 我就会感到 你是想伤害我的感情 |
| [07:31] | Oh, my God. Why do you talk so slow? | 神啊 你语速为什么这么慢 |
| [07:36] | When you say that, | 你这样说的时候 |
| [07:37] | – what I feel is that you’re trying to hurt… – Oh man, Tina. | -我就会感到 -我勒个去 蒂娜 |
| [07:39] | This is really, really boring. | 这真是太太太无聊了 |
| [07:42] | Okay, well… | 好吧 |
| [07:43] | Hey, mom, you want to hang out? | 老妈 想不想出去玩 |
| [07:45] | Oh, I’d love that! | 想呀想呀 |
| [07:48] | Oh, mother-daughter bonding time. | 母女互动时间 |
| [07:51] | Just like me and my mother. | 就像我和我妈当年一样 |
| [07:53] | Ooh! Makeover! | 先来化个妆 |
| [07:59] | Okay, my little cowpokes. | 好了 牛仔仔们 |
| [08:01] | Time for school. | 该上学了 |
| [08:03] | You can watch the rest tonight. | 剩下的可以今晚看 |
| [08:04] | Mom, How could you?! | 老妈 你怎么能这样 |
| [08:06] | How could I what? | 我哪样了 |
| [08:07] | How could you encourage this? | 你怎么能鼓励他们这样 |
| [08:09] | Oh, Louise, don’t be a pill. | 露易丝 别捣乱了 |
| [08:11] | A little father-son bonding is going on here | 他们俩正在享受父子互动时间 |
| [08:12] | and that’s a good thing. | 多么美好啊 |
| [08:14] | These two don’t always do it so well. | 他们俩可不总是如此融洽 |
| [08:16] | Tambourine solo! | 铃鼓独奏 |
| [08:19] | Sheesh. | 哎呀我去 |
| [08:25] | All right, this is how you throw a spiral. | 好了 看我给你示范回旋球的投法 |
| [08:27] | You ready? Here comes a bullet. | 准备好了吗 看球 |
| [08:30] | Oh, stupid ball! | 该死的橄榄球 |
| [08:31] | It’s ’cause there’s no laces. | 没有带子才会这样的 |
| [08:32] | I’m hungry. | 我好饿 |
| [08:34] | All right, we’re done. Go inside. | 好吧 今天就到这儿 进去吧 |
| [08:35] | I want peanut butter! | 我要吃花生酱 |
| [08:37] | It turns out we bond better over movies | 看来我们在看电影时更有共同语言 |
| [08:40] | that I like to watch, | 在看我喜欢的电影时 |
| [08:41] | that I make Gene watch. | 在我把吉恩拉过来看我喜欢的电影时 |
| [08:43] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [08:44] | Oh, that’s… that’s adorable. | 真是 真是太感人了 |
| [08:46] | I’m going to school. | 我要去上学了 |
| [08:48] | – Good. – Great. | -好 -很好 |
| [08:48] | Why don’t you learn something and become a lawyer. | 祝你学有所成 然后去当律师 |
| [08:52] | “调心击”控制法 调整情绪 心怀歉意 击掌庆祝 | |
| [08:52] | A.B.S. | “调心击”控制法 |
| [08:53] | The conflict resolution program | 这种解决冲突的方法 |
| [08:55] | sweeping our school. | 正在我校广为使用 |
| [08:57] | You all know my system, | 你们已经学会了我这套体系 |
| [08:58] | and at the spaghetti dinner, | 然后在意面晚宴上 |
| [09:00] | so will your parents or legal guardians. | 你们的家长或法定监护人也将学会这套体系 |
| [09:02] | Um, Becky, ’cause your mom’s in jail. | 贝琪 我这么说是因为你妈妈在坐牢 |
| [09:04] | Tina, Jocelyn, Jimmy Jr…. let’s rehearse. | 蒂娜 乔丝玲 小吉米 我们开始排练吧 |
| [09:07] | Becky, you just watch. | 贝琪 你看着就行了 |
| [09:08] | Tina here just found out that her best friend Jocelyn | 蒂娜刚刚得知她的死党乔丝玲 |
| [09:11] | told Jimmy Jr. that Tina is “whack”. | 跟小吉米说自己是个怪咖 |
| [09:14] | And… acting. | 开始吧 |
| [09:17] | Tina, Jocelyn told me you are whack. | 蒂娜 乔丝玲跟我说你是个怪咖 |
| [09:19] | Jocelyn, you skank. I hate you. | 乔丝玲 你个丑八怪 我恨你 |
| [09:21] | Whatever. | 随便你怎么说 |
| [09:22] | It’s true. | 我说的可是事实 |
| [09:23] | You are whack. | 你就是个怪咖 |
| [09:27] | And… freeze! | 停 |
| [09:30] | Well, that resolved nothing. | 这种方式可解决不了问题 |
| [09:32] | Let’s rewind, shall we? | 我们倒回去重来 好吗 |
| [09:39] | Let’s work out our A.B.S. | 现在我们来试试”调心击”控制法 |
| [09:41] | A! Access your feelings! | 调 调整情绪 |
| [09:43] | When you gossiped about me to Jimmy Jr., | 你在小吉米面前说我坏话 |
| [09:46] | it hurt my feelings. | 很伤我感情的 |
| [09:47] | B! Be apologetic! | 心 心怀歉意 |
| [09:49] | Sorry. | 对不起 |
| [09:51] | S! Slap it! | 击 击掌庆祝 |
| [09:52] | Well done. Do it just like that at the dinner. | 干得漂亮 晚宴时这样做就行了 |
| [09:55] | Oh, enjoy your lunch, everyone. | 同学们 去吃午饭吧 |
| [09:59] | If you ever gossip about me to Jimmy Jr. | 如果你在练习之外 |
| [10:01] | outside of a conflict resolution skit, | 跟小吉米说我坏话 |
| [10:03] | I’ll punch you in the face. | 你就等着吃拳头吧 |
| [10:05] | It was just a skit, Tina. | 我们只是在排练啊 蒂娜 |
| [10:07] | I will punch you. | 我真的会揍人的 |
| [10:08] | Again and again and again and again… | 揍死你 揍死你 揍死你 揍死你 |
| [10:12] | My God, what a psycho. | 天哪 真是个神经病 |
| [10:13] | And again and again and again and again and… | 揍死你 揍死你 揍死你 揍死你 |
| [10:19] | Well, the important thing is, | 重要的是 |
| [10:21] | I shared this movie with Gene | 我和吉恩一起看了这部电影 |
| [10:21] | and it helped him stand up for himself at school. | 这让他在学校里扬眉吐气了 |
| [10:24] | Eh, I beat up a lot of kids like Gene | 我像吉恩那么大的时候 |
| [10:25] | when I was his age. | 可是揍了不少他那样的臭小子 |
| [10:27] | Not that I was a bully… | 我并不是恃强凌弱 |
| [10:29] | just kids like Gene, you know, that get beat up. | 只是像吉恩这样的臭小子 需要吃点教训 |
| [10:31] | Bob, how are the meatballs coming? | 鲍勃 肉丸做的怎么样了 |
| [10:33] | Because they need to be perfect. | 要美美无瑕的哦 |
| [10:35] | Hey, it’s just like your burgers, only spherical! | 跟你的汉堡一个样 都是球形的 |
| [10:38] | – Hey! – Hey, what? | -手拿开 -怎么啦 |
| [10:39] | They’re not for you. | 这些不是给你吃的 |
| [10:40] | They’re for me to show off | 这些是用来在慈善晚宴上 |
| [10:42] | in front of the other moms at the fund-raiser. | 在其他妈妈面前炫耀的 |
| [10:44] | Bobby, make one extra-big | 鲍鲍 为柯琳·卡维罗 |
| [10:45] | for Colleen Caviello to choke on. | 做一个超大号的 噎死她 |
| [10:48] | Okay. | 好的 |
| [10:51] | All right, looks like I’m sitting with you today. | 成 看来今天只好和你们坐一起了 |
| [10:54] | Here’s the pecking order: | 我来定定规矩 |
| [10:55] | Me, then either of you. | 我为先 其次 你俩随意了 |
| [10:57] | Which sticker do you like better, | 这两张贴纸你比较喜欢哪个 |
| [10:59] | my purple ladybug or Susie’s red one? | 我的紫色瓢虫还是苏西的红色瓢虫 |
| [11:02] | And good-bye. | 拜拜您呐 |
| [11:05] | Hey there, Spew-Spew. | 喂 吐吐 |
| [11:07] | Funny seeing you here. | 在这儿见到你真有趣 |
| [11:09] | In the cafeteria during lunch? | 午餐时间你也不放过我 |
| [11:11] | Yeah. | 没错 |
| [11:13] | Why do you keep doing that? | 你干嘛老这样 |
| [11:14] | Keep doing what? | 老怎么样 |
| [11:17] | You’re weird! | 真是个怪胎 |
| [11:18] | Weird? I think you mean anti-hero. | 怪胎 你觉得你想说的是”反传统主角” |
| [11:20] | Look at the hat. | 看我帽子 |
| [11:22] | It’s mom’s sun hat, you dork. | 那是妈妈的遮阳帽 你这呆瓜 |
| [11:25] | You like finishing my jokes? | 你喜欢抖我的包袱吗 |
| [11:28] | Well, finish my food. | 先吃完我的剩饭吧 |
| [11:30] | Gene, you are being a class act jerk. | 吉恩 你这样简直是个出色的地痞流氓 |
| [11:33] | This is all about jokes from your stupid joke book. | 这些段子都是你那本傻缺的笑话书里的 |
| [11:36] | You’ve insulted Jokes for Blokes for the last time. | 休想再羞辱我的《纯爷们笑话精选》 |
| [11:41] | Oh, don’t you even think about it, Gene. | 别做梦了 吉恩 |
| [11:52] | Food fight! | 食物大战 |
| [11:57] | “调心击”控制法 调整情绪 心怀歉意 击掌庆祝 | |
| [12:00] | No…! | 不 |
| [12:07] | And these two, Bob, were throwing at each other. | 鲍勃 这俩小家伙互砸东西 |
| [12:09] | I hate you. | 我恨你 |
| [12:10] | I hate you. | 我才恨你 |
| [12:11] | They seem to be in conflict. | 他们似乎有矛盾 |
| [12:14] | I’m sure we can, uh, work through it. | 我相信我们可以和平解决 |
| [12:16] | I’d like you to take a look at my A.B.S. | 我想让你看看我的”调心击”控制法 |
| [12:19] | Um, no thank you. | 不了 多谢 |
| [12:21] | Show him your A.B.S., Mr. Frond. | 给他看看”调心击”控制法 福旺德老师 |
| [12:23] | – We’d all like to see your A.B.S. – Okay. | -我们都想看看”调心击”控制法 -好 |
| [12:24] | I really don’t. | 我真不想 |
| [12:25] | – And your ding-dong. – Gene. | -你说过好几次了 -吉恩 |
| [12:27] | Gene, why don’t you access | 吉恩 当露易丝跟你发火时 |
| [12:29] | how it makes you feel that Louise’s angry with you. | 你为什么不调整一下情绪 |
| [12:32] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [12:34] | That’s all I’m gonna say. | 我就说这么多 |
| [12:35] | Well, this is all I’m gonna say. | 我也说这么多 |
| [12:38] | Hi-yah! | 看打 |
| [12:40] | Let go of my… | 放开我的… |
| [12:42] | Hey, Louise, Louise, Louise. | 露易丝 露易丝 露易丝 |
| [12:44] | You’re not using your A.B.S. | 你没用到”调心击”控制法 |
| [12:46] | Um, this is dumb. | 真二 |
| [12:47] | – Bo– Bob. – Yes. | -鲍勃 -哎 |
| [12:49] | When you say “This is dumb,” | 当你说”真二”时 |
| [12:51] | it makes me feel like pinching you in the eye. | 我真的很想掐你的眼睛 |
| [12:55] | Why did you do that? | 你这是干嘛 |
| [12:57] | So we can resolve this | 这样我们就可以解决问题 |
| [12:59] | and set a good example for your children. | 给你的孩子们竖立好榜样 |
| [13:01] | Okay. | 那好吧 |
| [13:02] | I will now kick you in the shin. | 那我就踹你小腿 |
| [13:05] | Okay. Okay. | 好吧 好吧 |
| [13:07] | All right. | 好了 |
| [13:09] | Don’t throw repressed memory Emily! | 不要用记忆压抑的艾米丽砸人 |
| [13:11] | She won’t remember this. | 她不会记住这个的 |
| [13:13] | Well, this is really working out, Mr. Frond. | 这招真的很管用 福旺德老师 |
| [13:14] | Your system is amazing. | 您的体系棒极了 |
| [13:16] | – We’re gonna go. – Ho. No, no, no, no, no. | -我们要回去了 -不不不不不 |
| [13:18] | You know what? I forgot to say… | 知道吗 我忘了说 |
| [13:20] | Detention! Detention! | 留堂 给我留堂 |
| [13:22] | And you, | 还有你 |
| [13:23] | I am gonna cut you! | 我要取消你的资格 |
| [13:25] | I am gonna cut you | 我要取消你参加 |
| [13:27] | out of the conflict resolution spaghetti dinner! | 解决冲突意面晚宴的资格 |
| [13:28] | Wha– Oh, come on, you can’t… | 得了吧 你不能… |
| [13:30] | Too late! | 太晚了 |
| [13:31] | The conflict resolution spaghetti dinner | 解决冲突意面晚宴 |
| [13:33] | will now be a conflict resolution fast. | 现在变成解决冲突禁食晚宴 |
| [13:36] | Well, that didn’t go so well. | 事情进展得不是很顺利啊 |
| [13:39] | Yeah, he seemed angry. | 他看起来很生气 |
| [13:40] | Frothy. | 摆什么臭架子 |
| [13:40] | And kind of bloated, right? | 还傲慢自大 是不 |
| [13:43] | Maybe he’s dehydrated. | 也许他是脱水了 |
| [13:44] | Your mother’s gonna kill me. | 你们老妈会杀了我的 |
| [13:46] | So glad we had a chance to talk this out! | 很高兴有机会谈妥这个问题 |
| [13:50] | Emily, I’m sorry! | 艾米丽 对不起 |
| [13:54] | Detention?! | 留堂 |
| [13:55] | And we’re banned from catering the peace club dinner! | 还被勒令停办”和平友爱俱乐部”晚宴 |
| [13:58] | – Bobby! – I’m sorry, Lin, I… | -鲍鲍 -很抱歉 琳 我 |
| [13:59] | I can’t even tell you | 你知道不知道 |
| [14:01] | how many favors I had to call in to cater that thing. | 为了举办这次晚宴我欠了多少人情 |
| [14:03] | How many? | 欠了多少 |
| [14:05] | Two! | 两个 |
| [14:05] | Tina, you’re supposed to be watching the restaurant. | 蒂娜 你不是应该看店的吗 |
| [14:08] | I’m too upset to serve food. | 我没心情上菜 |
| [14:10] | What’d you do? Did you lock up? | 你干了什么 你把门锁上了吗 |
| [14:12] | – Yes. – Were there customers inside? | -是的 -客人们都被锁在餐馆里了吗 |
| [14:14] | I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [14:16] | No one’s gonna come to the fund-raiser now. | 现在没人会来参加募捐晚宴了 |
| [14:18] | Good job, Bobby! | 干得漂亮 鲍鲍 |
| [14:19] | It’s not my fault, Lin. | 这不是我的错 琳 |
| [14:21] | It was Mr. Frond’s fault. | 是福旺德老师的错 |
| [14:22] | – And Louise’s. – And Gene’s! | -是露易丝的错 -是吉恩的错 |
| [14:24] | And most of all, that stupid movie. | 罪魁祸首 其实是那部傻缺电影 |
| [14:27] | Hey, don’t blame the movie. | 别把错怪在电影头上 |
| [14:28] | Leave bingo out of this! | 别互相埋怨了 |
| [14:30] | Shut up! | 闭嘴 |
| [14:30] | All of you! | 都给我闭嘴 |
| [14:32] | I’m locking these movies in my jewelry drawer. | 我要把这些影碟锁到我的珠宝屉里 |
| [14:34] | – Aw, come on. – Unfair! | -别这样 -这不公平 |
| [14:35] | About time. | 是时候锁起来了 |
| [14:36] | You’re overreacting, Lin. | 你反应过激了 琳 |
| [14:37] | The hell I am! | 就他妈的过激怎么地 |
| [14:39] | I’m in charge of a spaghetti dinner | 我负责策划一场意面晚宴 |
| [14:41] | that’s not gonna have any spaghetti! | 晚宴上却没有意面 |
| [14:42] | If we all just worked on our A.B.S… | 如果我们都运用”调心击”控制法… |
| [14:44] | Not now with that crap, Tina! | 现在不是卖弄那种狗屎的时候 蒂娜 |
| [15:01] | I can’t believe I got detention. | 真不敢相信我被留堂了 |
| [15:03] | I can’t believe I got detention. | 真不敢相信我被留堂了 |
| [15:05] | If I were you, | 如果我是你 |
| [15:05] | I would teach Gene a lesson | 我会教训吉恩一顿 |
| [15:07] | he’ll never forget. | 让他永生难忘 |
| [15:08] | I had a perfect record, | 我的记录一直很完美 |
| [15:11] | – and then you tainted it. – Taint. | -直到你在上面画上了污点 -污点 |
| [15:13] | Looks like you got Choo-Choo right where you want him. | 看来你已经把楚楚置于死地了 |
| [15:16] | Just give him that icy stare | 给他一个冰冷犀利的眼神 |
| [15:17] | with some little princess and finish him. | 然后拨拉几下琴弦 最后了结他 |
| [15:20] | You want a little of this? | 想见识见识这个吗 |
| [15:24] | Oh, oh, yeah, he wants it. | 是的是的 他想见识见识 |
| [15:26] | Now give him the icy stare. | 现在 用冰冷的眼神杀死他 |
| [15:29] | Put him in his place. | 煞煞他的威风 |
| [15:30] | You’re dead! | 你死定了 |
| [15:31] | Quiet! | 安静 |
| [15:37] | Okay, well, I’m gonna go get Gene and Louise from detention. | 我去把留堂的吉恩和露易丝接回来 |
| [15:40] | Great! Bring some meatballs. | 很好 带点肉丸去吧 |
| [15:42] | Got plenty of meatballs. | 我们有很多很多的肉丸哦 |
| [15:44] | All dressed up and nowhere to go. | 精心打扮 却无处可去 |
| [15:47] | Meatball. | 肉丸 |
| [15:49] | All right. | 好吧 |
| [15:50] | I’m gonna leave. | 我要走了 |
| [15:53] | Gene, this happens now! | 吉恩 放马过来 |
| [15:56] | Uh, how are we doing this? | 咱们比划什么啊 |
| [15:59] | Staring contest? | 瞪眼比赛 |
| [16:02] | Joke-off? | 还是讲冷笑话 |
| [16:03] | Kick his ass, Choo-Choo! | 踢爆他菊花 楚楚 |
| [16:06] | Why are their shirts off? Oh, boy. | 他们为什么光着膀子 我的天啊 |
| [16:08] | I didn’t want to do this. | 我本不想这样的 |
| [16:10] | I haven’t even pressed the blue button yet. | 我还没有按下蓝色按钮呢 |
| [16:11] | I don’t even know what sound… | 我甚至不知道那会是什么样的声音… |
| [16:15] | Fight! Fight! Fight! | 打 打 打 |
| [16:16] | – Stop, there’s not gonna be a fight. – Oh, thank God. | -住手 不许打架 -谢天谢地 |
| [16:18] | Let me go! This train is off the tracks. | 放开我 我这辆愤怒的火车已经脱轨了 |
| [16:21] | Choo-Choo! | 呜 呜 |
| [16:24] | Oh, I get the name now. | 现在我明白你名字是怎么来的了 |
| [16:26] | I always thought it was ’cause of how he chewed. | 我还以为那是他嚼东西时发出的声音呢 |
| [16:28] | ‘Cause he chews like a train. | 因为他嚼东西的声音很像火车叫唤 |
| [16:30] | Hey, calm down. | 冷静点 |
| [16:34] | Let’s go home, Gene. | 咱回家吧 吉恩 |
| [16:35] | – You touching my kid? – Sorry. What? | -你敢碰我儿子 -抱歉 什么 |
| [16:37] | I said, you touching my kid? | 我说 你敢碰我儿子 |
| [16:38] | Oh, he was attacking my kid. | 他刚才在欺负我儿子 |
| [16:40] | Oh, yeah? Good. | 是么 好极了 |
| [16:42] | What is going on with the shirts? | 你们俩干嘛都光膀子啊 |
| [16:43] | I’m gonna beat your ass so bad | 我要踢爆你菊花 |
| [16:45] | I can skip the gym tonight. | 这样今晚我就不用健身了 |
| [16:46] | Dad, this is bad. | 老爸 情况不妙啊 |
| [16:48] | Thank you, Louise. | 谢谢提醒 露易丝 |
| [16:49] | I have it under control. | 都在我掌控范围内呢 |
| [16:50] | This happens now! | 放马过来吧 |
| [16:51] | Kill him! | 杀了他 |
| [16:53] | – Run! – I can’t. | -快跑 -我跑不动 |
| [16:55] | I’ve got this frigging guitar around my neck! | 脖子上挂着这把该死的吉他我跑不动 |
| [17:11] | – Oh, Gene, push down. – I’m trying. | -吉恩 往下来点 -我在努力 |
| [17:13] | All right. | 好了 |
| [17:14] | All right, just so we’re clear, | 好了 目前为止我们安全了 |
| [17:16] | we’re not hiding from those guys. | 我们这不是躲避他们 |
| [17:18] | We’re respectfully declining their invitation for a fight, | 只是礼貌地谢绝他们发出的打架邀请 |
| [17:20] | okay? | 对吧 |
| [17:20] | Right. No, thank you. | 对 不 谢谢你 |
| [17:21] | I would absolutely get into a fight | 刚才那节骨眼要不是你 |
| [17:24] | under the right circumstances, if… | 我就挨他们… |
| [17:26] | What’s that smell? | 什么味儿 |
| [17:28] | – Oh, Gene! – Gene! | -吉恩 -吉恩 |
| [17:30] | I’m sorry! | 对不起嘛 |
| [17:31] | Hey, shh, shh. I hear them. | 别出声 我听到他们过来了 |
| [17:32] | They’re coming. | 他们过来了 |
| [17:34] | Real…? You– you hear them? | 真… 你听到了吗 |
| [17:36] | – Gotcha. – Louise, enough. | -骗到你啦 -露易丝 够了 |
| [17:38] | You’ve been stirring the pot for three days, | 你煽风点火三整天了 |
| [17:40] | and acting like a baby. | 像小孩一样不懂事 |
| [17:41] | Now you owe your brother an apology | 现在你给你哥惹了麻烦 |
| [17:42] | for getting him in trouble. | 快跟他道歉 |
| [17:43] | Me?! | 我道歉 |
| [17:44] | Both of you owe me an apology. | 你们两个各自欠我一个道歉 |
| [17:47] | Both of us? Why? | 我们两个 为什么 |
| [17:48] | Because we wanted to watch Banjo? | 就因为我们想看班卓吗 |
| [17:50] | Because you stopped hanging out with me. | 因为你们两个不再陪我玩了 |
| [17:53] | – What? – Shh. Use your slide voices. | -什么 -用假声说话 |
| [17:55] | First, the burn unit stopped hanging out. | 首先 老爸不跟我玩”挖苦游戏”了 |
| [17:58] | Then, the lunch bunch stopped hanging out. | 然后 吉恩又不跟我玩”食物法庭”了 |
| [18:01] | God, we have lame names. | 神啊 这帽子给戴的 |
| [18:02] | Who the hell am I gonna hang around, | 你们两个不陪我玩 |
| [18:04] | if not you two? | 我要跟谁玩 |
| [18:06] | Mom and Tina… the menstruation nation? | 老妈和蒂娜 她们两个”月见红”么 |
| [18:08] | Ugh! That’s a really bad name. | 那是什么破名字啊 |
| [18:10] | You’re all I’ve got. | 你俩是我的仅有 |
| [18:12] | Louise, I’m sorry. | 露易丝 我很抱歉 |
| [18:14] | Me, too. Don’t cry. | 我也很抱歉 别哭了 |
| [18:15] | Ha! Got you. | 骗到你们了 |
| [18:17] | You thought I was really crying. | 你们还真以为我在哭呢 |
| [18:19] | Gross. | 恶心死了 |
| [18:21] | Gene, stop. | 吉恩 停下 |
| [18:23] | Oh, my God. | 我的天啊 |
| [18:24] | I can’t help it. It’s anxiety. | 我憋不住啊 都是焦虑惹的祸 |
| [18:26] | And turkey jerky. | 我还没放完呢 |
| [18:28] | It’s so incredible. | 真是太不可思议了 |
| [18:30] | – Your farts smell like mine. – Really? | -你放的屁闻起来很像我的 -真的么 |
| [18:32] | Oh, great. Are you guys bonding again? | 好么 你们俩又开始互动了么 |
| [18:34] | I’m sorry, but that’s a huge discovery. | 很抱歉 但这是一个重大发现 |
| [18:36] | A fart is like a fingerprint, | 屁味跟指纹一样 |
| [18:38] | and we have the same fingerprints. | 我们有相同的指纹 |
| [18:39] | High-five. | 击个掌 |
| [18:41] | – Put your hand up. – All right. | -来击个掌 -好 |
| [18:43] | I swear my farts smell like your farts, dad. | 我发誓我的屁味跟你的也一样 老爸 |
| [18:45] | I don’t think so, Louise. | 我可不觉得 露易丝 |
| [18:46] | Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. | 等等等等 |
| [18:48] | Huh? | 怎么样 |
| [18:50] | No. That smells like your mom’s. | 不 闻起来像你老妈的 |
| [18:52] | No! | 不要啊 |
| [18:54] | Oh, your mom. | 你老妈 |
| [18:56] | What are we gonna do about mom and Tina? | 你们老妈和蒂娜可怎么办 |
| [18:58] | They could live in here with us! | 她们可以和我们一起住这里 |
| [18:59] | I think I know a better way. | 我有个更好的主意 |
| [19:04] | I’m starving. How embarrassing. | 我要饿死了 真窘迫 |
| [19:07] | Guess people will be talking about my baked ziti for another year. | 看来我烤的通心粉又要被热议一整年了 |
| [19:11] | Guess people will be talking about my baked ziti for another year. | 看来我烤的通心粉又要被热议一整年了 |
| [19:14] | Oh, Linda, I didn’t see you. | 琳达 我刚才没看见你 |
| [19:15] | Hi, Coll. How are you? | 小柯 你好吗 |
| [19:26] | Thank you. | 谢谢大家 |
| [19:27] | Tonight, with your help, | 今晚 在你们的帮助下 |
| [19:29] | we raised over $100. | 我们筹到了一百多块钱 |
| [19:31] | It was $110. | 其实是一百一十块 |
| [19:33] | I warned you, skank! | 我警告过你 丑八怪 |
| [19:38] | Girls, please. | 姑娘们 注意形象 |
| [19:40] | It’s not time for the skit. | 这可不是排练时间 |
| [19:42] | This isn’t a skit. | 才不是排练呢 |
| [19:43] | This is real life. | 我跟她来真格的 |
| [19:44] | Last year, the only fighting was | 去年 唯一引发动乱的 |
| [19:45] | to get seconds on my ziti! | 就是我的通心粉 |
| [19:48] | Okay, that’s it, Colleen. | 够了 柯琳 |
| [19:50] | Let me tell you about that ziti. | 我来告诉你们那通心粉到底是怎么回事吧 |
| [19:51] | That sauce was store-bought, and you know it. | 调味汁是在店里买的 你心知肚明 |
| [19:56] | Ladies, please! | 女士们 别打了 |
| [20:07] | I thought I told you, Bob. | 我警告过你了 鲍勃 |
| [20:09] | You and your spaghetti aren’t welcome here. | 这里不欢迎你和你的意大利面 |
| [20:14] | But I want to say something. | 但我想说几句 |
| [20:15] | No, thank you. | 谢谢 不用 |
| [20:16] | I’ve had enough of your hurt speech. | 你那些伤人的话我听够了 |
| [20:19] | Would it make a difference if I… | 有挽回的余地吗 |
| [20:20] | worked on my A.B.S.? | 如果我运用”调心击”控制法 |
| [20:23] | I want to… a– | 我想… |
| [20:26] | What was “A” again? | 第一步是什么来着 |
| [20:27] | – Anus. – Amyl nitrate. | -屁眼 -硝酸戊酯 |
| [20:29] | Access… I want to access my feelings. | 调整 我想调整情绪 |
| [20:32] | Okay, okay, okay, okay, enough, enough, enough, enough. | 好了好了好了好了 够了够了够了够了 |
| [20:34] | Everyone’s about to kill each other here. | 大家都想杀人了吧 |
| [20:36] | Let’s… let’s eat! | 咱们… 开吃 |
| [20:37] | All right! | 好耶 |
| [20:40] | Meatballs! Meatballs! | 肉丸 肉丸 |
| [20:42] | Get your meatballs here. | 肉丸在这里 |
| [20:43] | And spaghetti. | 还有意面 |
| [20:54] | Here, Colleen, why don’t you put these balls in your face? | 来 柯琳 你怎么不把肉丸放脸上 |
| [21:03] | – Food fight! – No, no, no…! | -食物大战 -不不不 |