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神烦警探(Brooklyn Nine-Nine)第2季第12集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 神烦警探(Brooklyn Nine-Nine)第2季第12集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
时间 英文 中文
[00:04] Interesting. 有趣
[00:07] Very, very interesting. 非常 非常有趣
[00:10] Guys. 各位
[00:10] Captain Holt has no pants on. 警监没穿裤子
[00:12] Um… 呃
[00:14] What? 什么情况
[00:14] He has no pants on, is what. 情况就是他没穿裤子
[00:17] Here are the facts: 事情是这样的
[00:18] at 11:55 a.M., 在上午11点55分的时候
[00:19] Captain Holt walked past us holding a hot bowl of soup. 警监端着一碗热汤从我们旁边走过
[00:22] at 12:03 P.M., I heard him yell… 在中午12点03分 我听到他大喊
[00:25] Ouch! 哎呀
[00:26] Then at 12:07, 然后在12点07分
[00:28] he called Gina into his office. 他把Gina叫进了办公室
[00:30] She entered, holding nothing. 她进去的时候手上什么都没拿
[00:31] One minute later, she left holding an opaque bag. 1分钟过后 她拿着一个不透明袋子出来了
[00:34] Captain Holt’s pants were in that bag. 警监的裤子就在那袋子里
[00:37] His knees are in the breeze. 凉风正在吹抚着他的膝盖
[00:38] He’s in his undies. 他现在只穿着他的小内内
[00:40] That evidence is circumstantial. 这些都是间接证据
[00:42] Oh, so you guys want visual confirmation? 噢 所以你们是想要眼见为实啰
[00:44] – No. – Not really. – 不要 – 不是啊
[00:44] Done. 没问题
[00:46] Hey, Captain. 嗨 警监
[00:47] I just need you to sign something at my desk real quick. 我需要你来我座位上签点东西 很快的
[00:49] Just leave it on the couch. 把东西放在沙发上吧
[00:51] – Dismissed. – Okay. – 散了吧 – 好的
[00:53] Sir, you’re gonna freak. 警监 你要激动坏了
[00:55] Yo-Yo Ma is in the precinct, 马友友(大提琴家)来咱们区了
[00:56] and he’s giving out autographs. 他还在发签名照
[00:58] Yo-Yo Ma is on tour in Australia right now. 马友友正在澳大利亚巡演
[01:00] How would you know that? 你怎么会知道这个
[01:02] Sir, I’m choking on a lozenge! 警监 我被止咳糖噎到了
[01:04] I’m gonna die! 我要挂了
[01:06] – I got you, Jake! – No, no. – 我来救你了 Jake – 不 不要
[01:09] Stop. I swallowed it. 停 我吞了
[01:10] I swallowed it. It’s fine. 我吞下去了 没事了
[01:11] Hey, hey. 嘿 嘿
[01:13] I made you another bowl of soup 我给你又做了一碗汤
[01:14] since you spilled yours earlier, 因为看你把上一碗洒了
[01:16] but you’re gonna have to come over here to get it. 不过你得过来拿
[01:18] All right, Peralta, I’m sick of you wasting time, 好了 Peralta 我不想看到你再浪费时间了
[01:20] so, yes, I spilled some minestrone on my pants, 所以没错 我洒了点蔬菜汤到裤子上
[01:22] and I’m sitting in my underwear. 还有 我只穿着内裤
[01:23] Happy? 满意了吗
[01:24] Yes. 满意了
[01:26] Ah. 哎呀
[01:27] Sir, I need you to sign off on… 警监 我需要你签一下
[01:29] look at us, just three people with pants on 看看我们 只是三个穿着裤子的人
[01:32] having a normal conversation. 进行着正常的对话
[01:34] Yep. No story here. 没错 没什么事情发生
[01:55] Hello, everybody. 大家好
[01:57] In my hands, I hold the driving directions 我手上拿着的是去往
[02:00] to this year’s detectives-only getaway. 今年的全警探度假的驾驶指南
[02:02] Give it a cool name, Jake. 取个酷点的名字 Jake
[02:03] All right, detectives-only getaway… 好 全警探度假
[02:05] d-o-g, dog, dog party… 全 犬 犬假
[02:06] Dog Party ’15. 犬假2015
[02:08] Woof, woof, woof! 汪 汪 汪
[02:09] Big shout-out to Charles Boyle 大家欢呼感谢Charles Boyle
[02:10] for hosting us at his beach house this year. 今年在他的海滩别墅招待我们
[02:12] Yeah. 耶
[02:14] You should really thank my ex-wife. 你们其实应该感谢我的前妻
[02:15] We split it in the divorce. 我们离婚时分了这房子
[02:16] I get it for December through February. 从12月到2月归我用
[02:19] Winter B-house! Woof, woof, woof! 冬天的海滩别墅 汪 汪 汪
[02:21] Yeah, that’s not really catching on. 感觉这台词不会火
[02:22] – Aw. – As always, there will be no spouses, – 唉 – 像往常一样 没有配偶
[02:25] no bosses, no work… 没有老板 没有工作
[02:27] No bedtimes, 没有固定的就寝时间
[02:28] within reason. 但也不能太晚
[02:29] All right, Santiago’s feeling rowdy. 好了 Santiago已经嗨起来了
[02:31] Who else is feeling it? 还有谁感受到了这火热的气氛
[02:32] I can’t wait. 我等不及了
[02:34] This weekend, I am Vacation Terry. 这个周末我就是假期Terry
[02:36] No kids, no responsibilities. 没有孩子 没有责任
[02:38] I’m just a balloon floating in the great blue sky, 我只是飘浮在湛蓝天空中的一只气球
[02:41] and I am untethered. 没有束缚
[02:44] And just to clarify, 我想问一下
[02:45] how untethered is Vacation Terry from his wife? 假期Terry的老婆有多不束缚他
[02:48] Very tethered. 有很多束缚
[02:49] All right, anyone else have questions? 好了 还有人有问题吗
[02:51] Hitchcock, Scully, you’ve been weirdly silent. Hitchcock Scully 你们怎么这么安静啊
[02:52] We didn’t want to say anything 我们不想说错点什么
[02:54] that would get us uninvited. 搞到自己被踢出邀请
[02:55] Smart. All right, get pumped, people. 机智 好了 大家兴奋起来
[02:57] Dog Party ’15, ooh-ooh! 犬假2015 喔喔
[03:02] Two bottles of vodka. 两瓶伏特加
[03:05] Is this gonna be the weekend we finally meet six-drink Amy? 我们终于要在这周末见到六杯Amy了吗
[03:08] Six-drink Amy? What does that mean? 六杯Amy 啥意思
[03:10] It’s the pinnacle of the Santiago drunkenness scale. 这是Santiago酒量的顶峰
[03:14] One drink, Amy’s a little spacey. 一杯下肚 就会变得有点迟钝
[03:17] Wait. What? 等下 你说啥
[03:19] Two drinks: Loud Amy. 两杯下肚 讲话非常大声
[03:20] You want to get a cab? 要叫辆出租车吗
[03:22] Three drinks: 三杯下肚
[03:23] Amy dance pants. 开始乱舞
[03:26] Four-drink Amy is a bit of a pervert. 四杯过后变得有些猥琐
[03:28] Hey, check it out. 嘿 看这个
[03:31] And five-drink Amy 五杯之后
[03:32] is weirdly confident. 变得奇怪的有自信
[03:34] Let’s do this, little man. 咱来掰手腕吧 小不点
[03:37] But I’ve never seen six-drink Amy. 但我从没见过六杯过后的Amy
[03:40] Maybe she’s the one I could actually be friends with, 也许我能跟她真的成为朋友
[03:43] aka my sasquatch. 也就是 我的大脚野人
[03:53] Hey, there, beautiful. 嘿 美女
[03:55] Marcus, what are you doing here? Marcus 你在这儿干什么
[03:57] I know you lost your phone charger, 我知道你把手机充电器弄丢了
[03:58] so I got you a new one, and I want to make sure 所以我给你买了个新的 还有我想确定一下
[03:59] your phone’s all juiced up 你手机充满电没有
[04:01] for some sweet long-distance texting. 好跟我甜蜜地发短信
[04:03] Thanks. What do I owe you? 谢谢 我欠你多少钱
[04:04] It’s a gift. 这是礼物
[04:06] All you got to say is thank you. 只要说谢谢就可以了
[04:07] I said thank you. That was the first thing I said. 我说了谢谢 这是我说的第一句话
[04:10] Sorry. You’re nice. 对不起 你真好
[04:12] I’ll text you. 我会给你短信的
[04:13] Can’t wait. 我等着哦
[04:15] Inappropriate work kiss. 不合时宜的工作亲亲
[04:16] Too fast. Can’t stop me. 太快了你拦不住我
[04:21] Rosa D macking down with her boo on the street! Rosa D 在街上跟宝贝亲密
[04:25] I love it. 我喜欢
[04:26] Say “Boo” Again, I will shoot you in the stomach. 再说宝贝 我就朝你肚子开一枪
[04:28] Fine. “Lover boy” It is. 好吧 就叫美男子吧
[04:30] What did I just say, Charles? 我刚刚怎么说的 Charles
[04:31] – What did I just say? – You said… – 我怎么说的 – 你说
[04:32] you said not to say it. 你让我不要说
[04:35] Peralta, I thought you already left. Peralta 我以为你已经走了
[04:36] Yeah, I closed a couple of cases 是啊 我结了几个案
[04:38] and had to finish up the paperwork. 要完成一些文件
[04:39] Also, I wanted to thank you again 还有 我想再次谢谢你
[04:41] for giving us this half day. 放了我们这半天假
[04:42] Yes, of course. 这是当然
[04:43] I understand how important these extravaganzas are. 我明白这些娱乐活动有多重要
[04:46] I’m sure you’ll have a hoot. 我相信你们会玩的很开心的
[04:47] Oh, yeah, although I’m sure our hoots 是的 但我知道我们玩的
[04:49] pale in comparison to the hoots that you had 肯定没有你当年
[04:50] back in the day. 玩的开心
[04:51] I bet things got supes hoots. 我打赌一定是超级开心
[04:53] Actually, I wasn’t privy to those events. 其实 我并没有怎么参加那些活动
[04:56] As a gay black detective, 作为一个黑人同性恋警探
[04:57] I was excluded from most social gatherings. 我被大多数社交活动排除在外
[04:59] You guys off to play some golf? 你们几个去打高尔夫球吗
[05:02] Yeah. You want to caddy? 对啊 你要来当球童吗
[05:04] No, I do not. 不 我不愿意
[05:06] Yeah. 是啊
[05:08] Golf sucks. 高尔夫球最没意思了
[05:10] I know that wasn’t the point of your story. 我知道这不是你故事的重点
[05:11] – Those guys were jerks. – Yes. – 那些人太差劲了 – 是啊
[05:13] But I do envy the camaraderie they shared. 不过我确实嫉妒他们的友谊
[05:16] I’ve always wanted to Josh around with my peers. 我一直想跟同事混在一起
[05:18] So you’ve never joshed around with anyone? 所以你从没有跟任何人混在一起吗
[05:20] Never. 从没有
[05:22] But go have fun with the squad. 去跟大家好好玩吧
[05:24] Really Josh around for me. 替我好好混
[05:30] Welcome to chateau boy-Al. 欢迎光临寒舍
[05:32] Eleanor told me to keep the place clean, Eleanor要我保持屋子的干净
[05:34] but I don’t care. 但我不在乎
[05:36] Mommy’s out of town, and we’re gonna party. 老妈走了 我们要玩起来
[05:39] You call your ex-wife mommy? 你管你前妻叫老妈吗
[05:40] Not consciously. 清醒的时候不叫
[05:41] This will do just fine. 这样就好了
[05:44] You brought pineapple? 你居然带了菠萝
[05:45] Well, the fanny runs deep. 还不止这些呢
[05:46] I am prepared for any vacation situation. 我为一切度假情景都做了准备
[05:49] I’ve got a bottle opener, sunscreen, 我有开瓶器 防晒乳
[05:51] inflatable neck pillow. 充气颈枕
[05:52] Wait. Are we having… 等等 我们会吃
[05:55] Fondue? 芝士火锅吗
[05:56] Tight. 赞
[05:57] Gina, you ready to party or what? Gina 准备好玩起来了吗
[05:59] Don’t mind if I… oh. 别介意我
[06:01] Whoa. 哇
[06:02] Dang! 不错啊
[06:04] Ah! 啊
[06:06] You’re two shots behind, Linetti. 你落后两杯了 Linetti
[06:08] What up, party people? 咋样 派对上的朋友们
[06:11] You know how I’m always saying it ain’t a real party 你们记得我总是说 聚会不算真正的聚会
[06:14] till your boss shows up unexpectedly? 直到你的老板意外出现吗
[06:16] Well, it’s a party. 这个聚会绝对真了
[06:18] What are you talking about? 你在说什么
[06:20] Hello, 你们好
[06:21] party people. 派对上的朋友们
[06:23] Peralta told me to say that. Peralta让我这样说的
[06:25] Yeah, I did. 没错 我让了
[06:26] *Ain’t no party like a Captain Holt party* *有警监的派对无与伦比*
[06:28] *’cause a Captain Holt party is a total surprise to everyone.* *因为警监把大家吓呆了*
[06:34] Okay, well, Captain, 好吧 警监
[06:36] the only free bedroom is my ex-wife’s, 唯一的空卧室是我前妻的
[06:38] which is strictly off-limits. 那是绝对不能动的
[06:39] She locks the door and takes the handle home with her. 她把门锁了起来 还把门把都带走了
[06:41] All right, you can have my bed. 好吧 你睡我的床吧
[06:43] Charles, I’ll take yours. Charles 我睡你的
[06:44] Problem solved. 问题解决了
[06:45] I’ll sleep on the floor. 我睡地上
[06:47] Captain, come with me. 警监 跟我来
[06:50] What the hell, Jake? 什么鬼啊 Jake
[06:52] No bosses. 说好的没有老板呢
[06:53] Look, he told me this story 听我说 他给我讲了个故事
[06:54] about how his squad always excluded him, 关于他的警队总孤立他
[06:56] and I know I come across as a cynical, badass cop 我知道我一直以一个愤世嫉俗 不好对付的警察形象示人
[07:01] with a checkered past and a thirst for… 有着一个不可猜测的过去 还有
[07:03] I felt bad. 我感到难过
[07:04] You would’ve too. 你们也会的
[07:05] Guys, he just wants to josh around. 各位 他只是想跟我们混在一起
[07:08] Is that so bad? 这有那么不好吗
[07:09] I am dating his nephew. 我在跟他外甥约会
[07:10] Now we’re hanging out on weekends? 现在我们周末又在一起玩耍吗
[07:12] What is next? 下一步是啥
[07:13] Small talk. 闲聊
[07:15] Okay, Amy, you got to be glad that Holt’s here, right? 好吧 Amy 警监在这儿你一定很高兴吧
[07:18] I mean, you’re basically in love with him. 我是说 你基本上就是爱上他了
[07:19] I love him. 我敬爱他
[07:20] I’m not in love with him, 我没爱上他
[07:22] but I’m definitely not comfortable 但我绝对不想在醉醺醺的情况下
[07:24] being drunk around him. 和他相处
[07:25] Ames, please keep the volume down, okay? Amy 拜托你小声点好吗
[07:27] Sorry. It’s two drinks. 抱歉 我在两杯阶段
[07:28] I can’t help it. That’s it. 我控制不了 就这样了
[07:30] I’m cutting myself off. 我不喝了
[07:31] So Jake messes up, and you punish me for it? Jake闯了祸 受罚的却是我吗
[07:34] Come on, Amy. You’re better than that. 拜托 Amy 你不是这样的
[07:36] You guys, this is gonna be fine. 各位 不会出什么事的
[07:38] I mean, Terry’s our boss, and he comes with us every year. Terry也是我们上司啊 还不是每年都一起来
[07:40] Correction: You bring Vacation Terry, 错 你带来的是假期Terry
[07:42] and he is no man’s boss. 他不是任何人的上司
[07:45] When the slippers are filled, 穿着抓绒拖鞋
[07:47] Terry is chilled. Terry就是在休闲
[07:49] We’re happy the captain’s here. 我们很高兴警监来了
[07:50] Thank you, Scully and Hitchcock, the voice of reason. 谢谢你们 Scully和Hitchock 理性之声
[07:53] Holt’s the big fish we’ve been waiting for. Holt可是条我们等待已久的大鱼
[07:55] We have an exciting investment opportunity to pitch him. 我们有个超赞的投资机会要推荐他
[07:57] – What? – It’s an offshore casino – 什么 – 是一艘目前
[07:59] that’s currently sunk off the coast of Delaware. 沉没在特拉华州海岸的海上赌场
[08:01] No, all right, you guys are both 不 得了 你们俩现在
[08:02] officially uninvited from this whole weekend. 正式不被邀请来这个周末了
[08:04] Too late. We drove up as a group. 太迟了 我们是组团开车来的
[08:06] There’s no getting rid of us. 不可能甩掉我们了
[08:07] – Ah. – Sorry, Jake. – 啊 – 抱歉 Jake
[08:08] This weekend’s gonna suck. 这个周末要被毁了
[08:09] All right, you know what? 好吧 你们知道吗
[08:11] You guys are being a bunch of racist, homophobic golf cops, 你们这帮人是一群种族歧视 恐同 还爱打高尔夫的警察
[08:14] and I for one think this weekend’s gonna be even more fun 我认为有了Holt这周末会
[08:17] because Holt is here. 更加精彩
[08:19] Hey, what are you doing down here? 嘿 你在这儿干嘛
[08:21] Lunch is ready. 午饭好啦
[08:22] – I’m texting Marcus. – Mm. – 我在给Marcus发短信 – 嗯
[08:23] Texting… 发短信
[08:25] that’s the most intimate thing you can do to a lover 这是用手指对爱人所能做出的
[08:27] with your fingers… 最亲密的事了
[08:30] other than washing their hair. 仅次于给他们洗头发
[08:31] So I texted Marcus, and he hasn’t texted me back. 我给Marcus发了短信 然后他没回我
[08:34] I can’t believe I’m asking this, but can you help me? 不敢相信我会这么问 但你能帮我吗
[08:36] Oh, Rosa, yes. 噢 Rosa 当然
[08:38] I am the perfect person for this job. 这方面我是专家
[08:40] Okay, let’s get busy. 好了 开始吧
[08:41] What was his initial text? 他最开始说了什么
[08:43] “I can’t believe I miss you this much “不敢相信仅仅三小时后
[08:44] after three hours, X.O.” 我就这么想你了 么么”
[08:45] X.O.? Girl, marry him. 么么吗 可以嫁了
[08:48] – What’d you write back? – “Ha-ha, lame.” – 你回了什么 – “哈哈 傻”
[08:49] It’s a joke. I was insulting him. 是个玩笑 我是在羞辱他
[08:52] You know, flirting. 你知道的 调情
[08:53] Think he’s mad? 你觉得他生气了吗
[08:54] I bet he’s heartbroken. 我赌他都心碎了
[08:56] No, no. We can fix this. 不 不 我们还能挽回
[08:58] We just have to write a very sweet, very heartfelt text 我们只需要发条非常甜蜜 非常贴心的短信
[09:01] that will jump-start the conversation. 可以一举给对话升温的那种
[09:03] “Hey, baby.” “嘿 宝贝”
[09:04] I don’t call people “Baby.” 我不会叫别人”宝贝”的
[09:05] You do now. 你现在会了
[09:06] So how do you all typically blow off steam? 所以你们具体是怎么释放压力的
[09:10] Does anyone have any formal complaints 有人要对工作环境提出
[09:11] about the work environment? 正式抗议吗
[09:12] No, no, we usually just gossip, right? 不不 我们通常只是聊聊八卦 对吧
[09:14] Yeah. 是啊
[09:15] Hey, did everyone see Dave from downstairs this week? 嘿 有人这周看见楼下的Dave了吗
[09:17] He shaved his beard. 他把胡子给刮了
[09:18] Oh, my God. 噢 我天哪
[09:19] His whole face looks like a butt. 他整张脸看起来就像个屁股似的
[09:22] Ha-ha, Butt Face Dave. 哈哈 屁股脸Dave
[09:24] Butt Face Dave, that’s his new name, 屁股脸Dave 就是他的新名字了
[09:25] butt face Dave, ’cause his face looks like a butt. 屁股脸Dave 因为他的脸看起来像个屁股
[09:29] I like David. He’s a good cop. 我喜欢David 他是个好警察
[09:34] – Yeah. – David is great. – 是啊 – David可棒了
[09:35] – He’s a good dude. – I like that guy. – 他是个好人 – 我喜欢那家伙
[09:38] I’d like to propose a toast. 我想说一下祝酒致辞
[09:39] – Good idea. Great idea. – Mm! – 好主意 好主意 – 嗯
[09:41] Amy, you don’t have a drink? Amy 你没有酒吗
[09:42] Oh, no, it’s okay. I don’t… 不 没关系的 我不
[09:44] The captain’s making a toast. 警监在敬酒呢
[09:45] Don’t be rude, Prude. 别这么没礼貌啊 假正经
[09:47] Okay, I guess I’ll have one more. 好吧 那我就再喝一杯
[09:50] You’re on vacation. Who’s counting? 你在度假呢 谁会数你喝几杯
[09:51] I am. 我会
[09:53] Thank you for inviting me up. 谢谢你们邀请我
[09:55] To joshing around together. 敬一同玩闹
[09:57] – Cheers. – To joshing! – 干杯 – 敬玩闹
[09:59] Joshing. 玩闹
[10:01] This is fun. 这真有趣
[10:02] Ooh, you know what we could do after lunch? 噢 你们知道午餐后我们能干嘛吗
[10:05] Walk on the beach. 海滩散步
[10:06] But it’s the middle of winter. 但现在可是严冬
[10:07] Which is ideal, you know? 所以正好啊 你知道吗
[10:08] Not too hot, no crowds. 又不会太热 又没有太多人
[10:10] The sand doesn’t get everywhere 沙子不会粘得到处都是
[10:12] ’cause it’s basically frozen. 因为它们基本上被冻住了
[10:13] Exactly. Who brought their beach boots? 正是如此 有谁带了海滩靴
[10:16] “I did.” “我带了”
[10:18] Spot-on Rosa impression. 满分的Rosa模仿
[10:23] This is nice. 真不错
[10:25] I mean, the wind is unexpected 我是说 虽然没想到有风
[10:27] but welcome and bracing. 但有风更爽了
[10:29] Yeah. 是啊
[10:30] It’s like a thousand little needles of happiness shooting into your face. 就像几千根幸福的小针往你脸上射
[10:35] Well, we’ve been walking for about 20 minutes, so… 我们已经走了二十分钟了
[10:38] So we should probably turn around in another 20. 那我们再走二十分钟然后就调头吧
[10:41] Good plan… 好啊
[10:42] an 80-minute walk on the beach. 八十分钟的沙滩漫步
[10:45] I’m so cold. 我好冷
[10:46] Even my fiery dance moves aren’t keeping me warm. 我这么动感的舞步都无法让身体热起来
[10:49] The trick is, you got to be prepared. 秘诀就是 永远要有所准备
[10:52] Mini cognac, ladies? 小瓶装的白兰地 女士们
[10:53] Oh, yeah! 噢 耶
[10:56] Oh, warm me up, you little bastard. 温暖我吧 你个小混蛋
[10:58] – Mm. – Four drinks. – 嗯 – 四杯了
[11:00] Mm, mm, mm. 嗯嗯嗯
[11:02] Thank you, Terry’s fanny. 谢谢 Terry的小腰包
[11:04] And thank you, Poseidon, 谢谢你 波塞冬
[11:06] great God of the sea! 伟大的海洋之神
[11:11] What are you wearing? 你穿的什么
[11:13] A T-shirt. t恤啊
[11:15] I only brought a bikini. 我只带了比基尼
[11:16] Seems weird to be in front of the captain 在警监面前穿泳装
[11:17] in a bathing suit. 好像有点奇怪
[11:18] Got to cover up them thangs, yeah? 要藏住那对大胸器哈
[11:20] FYI, you can still see them through your shirt. 不过 透过t恤还是能看见哟
[11:24] So here we all are, finally relaxing 终于啊 我们一个小队
[11:26] as a squad together in the tub. 一起在一个浴缸里放松身体
[11:29] It’s fun, huh? 真有意思哈
[11:30] I can’t hear anyone. 我什么也听不清
[11:31] Can we please turn off the jets? 可以关掉喷水的装置吗
[11:33] Yeah. 好的
[11:38] That’s better. 这样好多了
[11:39] No more disturbed water. 没有那些烦人的泡泡了
[11:41] Good call. 好主意
[11:42] Wow, without the bubbles, 哇 没有气泡之后
[11:44] you can really see everything. 真是什么都看得一清二楚呢
[11:45] Eyes up here, Peralta. 眼睛看这里 Peralta
[11:49] And… snip. 剪掉
[11:52] Mazel tov. 好啦
[11:53] Captain, I bet you used to smoke cigars 警监 我打赌你以前工作的时候
[11:55] on the job all the time, right? 肯定一直叼着一只雪茄 对不对
[11:56] No, but I had a partner who did. 不 但我有个搭档是这样的
[11:58] Had one burning all day long. 一只雪茄抽一整天
[12:00] Dan Hammer. Dan Hammer(锤子)
[12:01] That name is so cool, it doesn’t need a nickname. 这个名字好酷 酷得都不用取外号
[12:03] Ah, but he had one. 啊 不过他有个外号
[12:05] Snake Eyes. 蛇眼
[12:06] Oh, Snake Eyes is a great one. 噢 蛇眼取得好棒
[12:08] Oh, yeah. 噢 耶
[12:09] He was the toughest son of a bitch I ever met. 他是我见过最坚毅的汉子
[12:11] When he died, he stuck out his middle finger 他死的时候 坚持竖着一个中指
[12:13] so he’d be flipping everyone off at his funeral. 这样就可以冲每个出席的人竖中指了
[12:15] – Oh, that rules. – Yeah. – 噢 太酷了 – 是啊
[12:18] Who killed him? 谁杀了他
[12:19] Don’t say a white tiger on cocaine, 别说是一只磕了药的白虎啊
[12:21] ’cause I will lose it. 我会疯的
[12:22] No, cancer of the mouth, tongue, lip, and cheek. 不 是他遍布口腔 舌头 嘴唇和脸颊的癌细胞杀了他
[12:25] Hmm. 嗯
[12:28] Well, still, the middle finger thing is cool. 不过 中指那事还是很酷
[12:30] Actually, no one got to see that. 其实 没人看到他的中指
[12:32] It was closed casket because the doctors 他被放在封闭的棺材里了
[12:33] had removed so much of his face. 因为医生移除了他大部分面部
[12:35] All right, that’s that. 好吧 算了吧
[12:39] All right, I admit it. 好吧 我承认
[12:40] It’s weird having the captain here. 警监在这里确实怪怪的
[12:42] It straight up sucks. 简直烂透了
[12:43] Should we just go home? 我们应该回家吗
[12:44] What do you think, Terry? 你觉得呢 Terry
[12:45] I am not going anywhere. 我哪也不去
[12:48] I’m playing kwazy kupcakes. 我在玩”轰狂小蛋糕”
[12:50] I’m hydrated as hell, 手边就有喝的
[12:52] and I’m listening to Sheryl Crow. 还一边听着Sheryl Crow的歌
[12:54] I’ve got my own party going on. 我自己的派对早就开起来了
[12:55] Wait a minute. 等等
[12:56] Vacation Terry, you’re a genius. 假期Terry 你真是个天才
[12:59] We’ll have two parties, 我们办两个派对
[13:01] a fun one down here with just us 一个有趣的在这里 只有我们参加
[13:03] and then an awkward, uncomfortable one 一个无聊尴尬的在楼上客厅
[13:04] in the living room with Holt. 和警监一起
[13:05] He doesn’t even have to know about it. 我们不要让他知道
[13:07] Separate parties, separate but equal… 隔离派对 隔离但平等
[13:09] forget I said that phrase. 当我没说过这句话
[13:12] Ok, we don’t have much time. Captain’s in the bathroom, 行了 时间不多了 警监在卫生间里
[13:15] and we all know how efficient he is in there. 我们都知道他有多迅速
[13:17] Here’s the plan: The boring Holt party 计划是这样的 无聊的警监派对
[13:19] will be in the living room. 在楼上的客厅里
[13:20] At least three of us must be with him 无论什么时候 至少要有三个人
[13:21] in that room at all times. 和他待在那里
[13:23] It’s not a party if there aren’t four people. 如果少于四个人就不算派对了
[13:24] Especially between the sheets. 尤其是在床笫之间
[13:26] The other party will be in here. 另外一个派对在这里
[13:28] Shifts at each party will be 20 minutes and staggered. 每个派对的轮班是二十分钟一换
[13:30] Any questions? 有什么问题吗
[13:31] How do you get your hair like that? 你怎么把头发弄成那样的
[13:32] Born this way… also, Hitchcock and Scully 天生如此 对了 不能让Hitchcock和Scully
[13:35] are not to be left alone with the captain. 单独和警监在一起
[13:36] They’ll annoy him into leaving his party 他们会用那些沉船赌场的烂点子
[13:37] with their weird sunken casino idea. 疯狂骚扰警监的
[13:39] It’s not an idea. It’s a scheme. 这不只是个点子 是有计划的
[13:41] Okay, that is way worse. 好吧 更糟了
[13:43] I think this is gonna work. 我觉得会一切顺利的
[13:45] And who knows? 谁知道呢
[13:46] Maybe the Holt party will even be fun. 也许警监的派对还会比较有意思呢
[13:50] Now, the recorder is generally thought of 现在 竖笛被普遍看做是
[13:51] as a training instrument for children, 给小孩训练的一种乐器
[13:53] but listen to it. 但是你们记住
[13:54] In the hands of an expert like Joram Leifgrum… 在Joram Leigrum这样的专家的演奏下
[13:59] The passion is… 这种热情是
[14:02] breathtaking. 夺人心魄的
[14:03] Okay, so Marcus wrote, “What you doing right now?” 好 Marcus回了”你在干什么呢”
[14:07] Then a smiley face blowing a kiss. 然后是一个微笑着飞吻的表情
[14:09] Oh, he’s good. 噢 他真厉害
[14:10] We could say, “Thinking about you.” 我们可以回”在想你”
[14:13] Oh, forget it. That’s stupid. 算了 太蠢了
[14:14] No, Rosa, it’s poetry. 不 Rosa 很浪漫啊
[14:17] Oof. 呼
[14:19] First shift is done. 第一轮值班结束
[14:21] – How was it? – I’m not gonna lie. – 怎么样 – 说实话
[14:22] It was pretty brutal. 不是一般的可怕
[14:23] But on the plus side, I now hate 不过意外之喜是
[14:25] a whole new genre of music. 我对所有的新音乐类型都产生厌恶了
[14:26] All right, Boyle, Rosa, and Amy, you’re up. 好了 Boyle Rosa Amy 到你们了
[14:28] Come on, get on it. 快点 上去吧
[14:29] And under it. Bangarang. 得令 这就走起
[14:32] Ames Ames Ames Ames, Ames, Ames.
[14:33] You don’t want to be around Holt 你不会想就这样去见警监的
[14:34] in your current state. 这个状态可不行
[14:36] Say hello to the most confident woman alive. 迎接世界上最自信的女人吧
[14:40] Gah! 啊
[14:42] Drink number five. 第五杯了
[14:44] You are a true friend 你是个真正的好朋友
[14:47] and a hot little piece. 而且是个性感的小婊砸
[14:50] Good-bye, four-drink Amy. 再见 四杯Amy
[14:52] Sloppy sicko. 懒散的小混蛋
[14:55] His name is… 他的名字是
[14:57] Blair Underwood Blair Underwood.
[14:59] The man I saw in the grocery store was Blair Underwood. 我在杂货店看到的那个男人是Blair Underwood
[15:01] Hey, Ray, it’s time. 嘿 Ray 是时候了
[15:04] For what, Detective Santiago? 是时候做什么 Santiago警探
[15:07] For you to give me a promotion 你该给我升职
[15:08] and a 40% raise. 以及百分之四十的加薪了
[15:10] I’ve been carrying this squad for two years, 我带着这个小队两年了
[15:13] and my back’s getting tired. 已经受够了
[15:15] Excuse me, Captain. 不好意思 警监
[15:16] Hey, Amy, can I talk to you for one second? Amy 可以和你说一会话吗
[15:18] Uh, you just did. 一会已经过去了
[15:20] – Burn. – Ah, so good. – 没词了吧 – 好好好 你厉害
[15:21] So, listen, I don’t think overconfident Amy is working out. 听着 我觉得自信膨胀的Amy不适合这里
[15:24] Maybe you should go back downstairs. 也许你应该回楼下去
[15:26] Mm, maybe I should just have another drink. 嗯 也许我应该再喝一杯
[15:28] Get ready, America. 准备好了 美国
[15:29] Here comes six… 六杯Amy就要
[15:31] – Oh, what? – Okay, that’s… – 准备好 – 好吧 你
[15:35] Wait a minute. Why is Scully up here? 等等 Scully怎么上来了
[15:37] Hey, Captain. 嗨 警监
[15:38] How much does it cost to raise a sunken ship? 打捞一艘沉船要花多少钱
[15:41] Answer Less than a casino makes in a year hopefully. 希望比一家赌场的年利润要少一些吧
[15:44] What a funny riddle. 真是个有意思的谜题
[15:45] Hey, Scully, there’s this sandwich in the other room 嘿Scully 我想给你看看
[15:47] I want to show you. 另外一个房间里的那个三明治
[15:48] – Say no more. – Oh, that was easy. – 话不多说 走起 – 噢 真好糊弄
[15:50] What the hell, guys? 搞什么 你们这些人
[15:52] You can’t just let Scully go wherever he wants. 怎么能放Scully出去乱走呢
[15:54] We lost track of who was where, sorry. 我们忘记盯着谁在哪了 抱歉啊
[15:56] Guys, if we’re gonna pull this off, we need to focus. 嘿 如果我们要搞定这事 我们就得集中精神
[15:59] – You want to play? – Yeah, I want to play. – 你要玩吗 – 当然要了
[16:00] It’s quarters. What, am I a monster? 什么样的禽兽才不玩扔硬币啊
[16:02] Terry, tag me in. You’re on Holt party duty. Terry 我下来了 轮到你去Holt的派对了
[16:04] It seems to me all-wheel drive 我觉得 全轮驱动
[16:07] is four-wheel drive. 就是四轮驱动
[16:12] You need something. Who needs something? 你需要来点什么 谁要来点什么吗
[16:13] I know they say it’s not good 我知道他们都说
[16:15] to have a TV in the bedroom, 在卧室里装电视不好
[16:16] which is… 所以
[16:19] why I don’t. 我就没装
[16:24] I am the king of quarters! 我是扔硬币之王
[16:27] See, I told you guys we’d still have fun this weekend. 看吧 我说了这个周末还是能玩得很开心的
[16:30] Wait, Terry, aren’t you supposed to be upstairs? 等等 Terry 你不是应该在楼上吗
[16:32] Not now. It’s schnapps time. 谁说的 现在是杜松子酒时间
[16:35] Okay, Amy and Hitchcock are still upstairs. 好吧 Amy和Hitchcock还在楼上
[16:37] I think we’re still good. 应该不会出大问题
[16:38] Six-drink Amy… 喝了六杯的Amy
[16:42] is so alone. 好寂寥啊
[16:44] Oh, no. 噢不
[16:46] Six-drink Amy isn’t fun. 六杯Amy一点也不好玩
[16:48] She’s just sad. Damn it. 只是一个劲悲伤 我去
[16:50] Guys, this is really bad. 各位 这样不行
[16:51] Got to get up there. 赶紧上楼去
[16:53] Now, where is everyone? 大家都去哪里了
[16:54] Ah, Detectives. 啊 警探们
[16:57] You were having a party without me. 你们在背着我办派对
[17:00] – Captain… – No need to explain. – 警监 – 不用解释了
[17:05] This is gonna sound controversial, 说起来你们也许不同意
[17:08] but I think that went pretty good. 不过我觉得一切都很顺利
[17:10] Man, I’ve never seen Captain Holt that upset before. 天哪 我从来没见过Holt警监那么难过
[17:12] He looks like a sad block of granite. 像一块悲伤的花岗岩
[17:15] What are we gonna do? 我们要怎么做
[17:16] How do you cheer up granite? 怎样让花岗岩开心起来
[17:18] Well, you could salvage it, 你可以打捞它
[17:19] much like the casino we’ve been talk… 就像我们在说的那个赌场一样
[17:21] – Seriously, stop. – I feel awful. – 讲真的 别说了 – 我觉得好愧疚
[17:23] My fanny’s not deep enough to fix this. 我的腰包都没法治愈
[17:26] Vacation Terry… 假期Terry
[17:29] – is dead. – The fanny. – 已经死了 – 腰包啊
[17:31] I’m gonna go talk to Captain Holt. 我去和Holt警监谈谈
[17:32] No, don’t do that. 不 别去
[17:34] I invited him up here. 是我邀请他来的
[17:35] I should go talk to him. 应该我去和他谈
[17:36] – Okay. – What? – 好吧 – 啥
[17:38] Really thought you were gonna fight me on that, 我以为你会和我先争执一番
[17:39] and then we’d have a whole back-and-forth, 然后我们彼此反复争取这个机会
[17:41] and eventually you’d go, “Jake, I respect you”, 最后你说”Jake 我很尊重你
[17:43] but I got to do this.” 但是还是我去吧”
[17:44] No, it’s uncomfortable. 不 这事太难办了
[17:46] I’d much rather you do it. 还是你去吧
[17:47] All right, fine. 好吧 好吧
[17:49] Here I go. 我去了
[17:53] – You’re walking in place. – All right! – 你在原地踏步 – 好啦去啦
[17:55] Hey, I need to write Marcus back fast. 嘿 我要赶紧回Marcus短信
[17:57] He’s already freaked out by how long it takes me 已经很久没回了
[17:58] to text him back. 他有点吓到了
[18:00] Listen, Rosa, there’s nothing I’d rather do in my life 听着 Rosa 这个世界上我最愿意做的事情
[18:03] than write a sexy text to your boyfriend, 就是给你男朋友发调情短信
[18:05] but I think this is something you got to do on your own. 但是我觉得你应该自己去做这件事
[18:07] Why? 为什么
[18:08] You’re so good at being lame, and I’m not. 这种烂事你超擅长的 我一点不会啊
[18:09] – Yeah. – Look, I like him. – 是啊 – 听着 我喜欢他
[18:11] I really like him. 我真的喜欢他
[18:12] I don’t want to screw this crap up. 我不想把这破事搞砸了
[18:13] That’s what you should say. 这就是你应该说的
[18:15] Just take that sentiment, remove the word “Crap,” 把这句话打上去 去掉”破事”这个词
[18:17] and then send it. 然后发给他
[18:22] Yeah, yeah, yeah. 对 没错
[18:23] Gah, I sent it. 啊 我发了
[18:24] He didn’t write back, so he hates it. 他没回 他讨厌这句话
[18:25] No, wait. Look. 不 等等 看啊
[18:27] Okay, oh, okay, “Dot, dot, dot.” 好了 “点点点”
[18:31] It’s happening. 来了
[18:32] It’s a shirtless pic. 一张上半身的裸照
[18:34] We did it. We did it! 我们做到了 我们成功了
[18:37] Thanks, Boyle. 谢谢你 Boyle
[18:38] Okay, I’m gonna leave. Don’t follow me. 好了 我要走了 别跟过来
[18:40] Things are about to get intense. 接下来就会比较紧张刺激了
[18:41] Makes sense. 有道理
[18:44] Ames Ames.
[18:46] Gina Gina.
[18:47] You got to see the sasquatch. 来看这个大脚怪
[18:50] Was it everything you drumpt? 是不是你梦想的东西
[18:51] It was the stuff drumps are made of. 梦想皆是由此筑成
[18:54] Can you hold my eyes still till things stop spinning? 你可以在天旋地转停止前 扶着我的眼睛的
[18:57] Okay, let’s sit you up. 行了 坐起来吧
[18:58] There. Easy does… 小心点
[19:00] there… oh, there you go. 好了 坐好啦
[19:02] Now drink this entire glass of water. 现在喝下这杯水
[19:05] You’re taking care of me. 你在照顾我诶
[19:07] Just cause I know you won’t remember it. 反正你待会也不会记得
[19:09] Mm-mm, no. 嗯哼 不
[19:12] You like me. 你喜欢我
[19:13] Six-drink Amy is your friend. 六杯Amy是你的朋友
[19:19] And… and she’s gonna be very sick right now. 而且她觉得很不舒服很想吐了
[19:22] Okay. 好吧
[19:27] I heard you were out here. 听到你在外面呢
[19:28] Really hate those jets, huh? 真的很讨厌喷水的玩意哈
[19:30] I’m not a child. I don’t need a bubble bath. 我不是小孩 不需要泡泡浴
[19:35] So listen. 听着
[19:36] Before you say anything, I want to say I’m sorry. 在你说话之前 我想先和你道歉
[19:38] You’re sorry? 你道歉
[19:40] Wow, I can’t believe I almost made Terry do this. 哇 还好没让Terry捡到这个便宜
[19:42] Apology accepted. 接受你的道歉
[19:43] I was so eager to make up 我太急于弥补
[19:45] for all the joshing around I’d missed, 那些我错过的集体活动了
[19:46] I forgot this getaway is really for you detectives. 我忘记这次假期是属于你们警探的
[19:49] And one of the things you’re striving to get away from 这次假期中 你们想远离的
[19:52] is your captain. 包括你们的警监
[19:53] Yeah, I mean, it’s nothing against you as a person. 是 讲真 这事不是针对你个人的
[19:57] Everyone loves you, 大家都爱你
[19:58] but you’re our captain, 但是你是我们的警监
[20:00] and normally we get really drunk 通常我们都会一边开上司玩笑
[20:02] and act like crazy idiots and play stupid games 然后喝得烂醉 变得疯子一样
[20:04] where we make fun of the boss. 去玩那些很蠢的游戏
[20:06] Which is hard when the boss is present. 当上司在场的时候 就不好那样玩了
[20:09] Yeah. 是啊
[20:13] But not impossible. 但也不是不可能
[20:14] I think instead of us rising to your level, 与其把我们提升到你的水平
[20:17] it’s maybe time for you to stoop down to ours. 也许不如让你降低到我们的水平来
[20:27] And that’s just the start. 这就是我降低水平的开始
[20:30] I call the game “Real Ray or Fake Ray?” 这个游戏叫”真假警监”
[20:33] And joining us is a very special contestant, 有一位特殊参赛选手加入我们
[20:36] Captain Ray Holt himself. 他就是Ray Holt警监
[20:41] All right, here’s how the game works. 好了 游戏规则是这样的
[20:43] I will say a phrase. 我说一个句子
[20:44] You tell me if I made it up 你们来分辨是我编的
[20:45] or if it’s something that Captain Holt 还是Holt警监在真实生活中
[20:48] actually said in real life to an actual human being. 确实对某个人说过这个词
[20:50] I understand the logic of this game. 我明白这个游戏的逻辑
[20:52] Great! Phrase number one: 很好 第一个句子
[20:54] “The futility of lighting candles “枉然地点亮蜡烛
[20:57] only to blow them out immediately 只为下一秒就吹熄
[20:58] is just one reason I find children’s birthday parties impractical.” 是我认为儿童生日派对不切实际性的一个原因”
[21:03] – Holt. – That’s Holt. – 是警监 – 是警监说的
[21:04] Mm, fake. 不 是假的
[21:05] I say fake too. 我也觉得是假的
[21:06] I don’t remember saying it, so it must be fake. 我不记得说过这话 是假的
[21:08] It was real! 是真的
[21:10] To Terry’s kids at their birthday party. 在Terry女儿的生日派对上说的
[21:12] Oh, I remember now. 噢 我现在记起了
[21:13] Oh, do another one. Do another one. 再来一句 再出下一题
[21:14] All right, phrase number two: 好的 第二句
[21:16] “Any smile that lasts longer than a second and a half “任何一个超过一秒半的微笑
[21:19] is a con man’s ruse.” 都是骗子的诡计”
[21:22] That’s fake. That’s a fake one. 是假的 这是假的
[21:24] I said it. 我说过这话
[21:25] And I meant it! 而且我真这么觉得
[21:26] Oh! 噢
神烦警探

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