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神烦警探(Brooklyn Nine-Nine)第1季第18集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 神烦警探(Brooklyn Nine-Nine)第1季第18集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
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[00:00] So, again, your alibi is a mysterious stranger 所以 你还是辩解说 一位神秘的陌生人
[00:04] handed you the gun, made you put your prints on it, 递给你这把枪 沾到你的指纹后
[00:07] robbed the store, and then hid the gun in your underpants. 抢了这家店 再把这枪藏到你内裤里
[00:10] Well, yeah, if you say it like that, 是 你要是这样说
[00:11] it don’t sound believable. 听起来倒不那么可信了
[00:12] Oh, hey, Captain. 嘿 警监
[00:13] Did you get my report on the Finley murder? 你看了我关于Finley杀人案的报告吗
[00:15] Yeah, I looked it over. Nice work. 我看了 写得不错
[00:17] Good. Thanks, Dad. 好 谢了 老爸
[00:20] Why is everyone staring at me? 为什么大家都盯着我看
[00:23] You just called Captain Holt “Dad.” 你刚刚管Holt警监叫”老爸”
[00:24] You said, “Thanks, Dad.” 你说”谢了 老爸”
[00:25] What? No, I didn’t. I said, “Thanks, man.” 啥 我没有 我说的是”谢了 哥们”
[00:27] Do you see me as a father figure, Peralta? 我在你心目中是父亲的形象吗 Peralta
[00:29] No. If anything, I see you as a “Bother” Figure, 不 倒不如说 你在我心目中是负担的形象
[00:32] ’cause you’re always bothering me. 因为你老是给我增负担
[00:34] Hey, show your father some respect. 嘿 跟你父亲放尊重点
[00:36] I didn’t call him Dad. 我没叫他老爸
[00:37] No, no, no, no, Jacob. 没事 没事 Jacob
[00:39] I take it as a compliment. 我把它当做一种夸赞
[00:40] It’s not a big deal. 不是什么大事
[00:41] I called Vivian “Mom” Once, and she’s my fiance. 我有次管Vivian叫了妈妈 她是我的未婚妻
[00:44] Guys, jump on that! 大家 看看这家伙
[00:46] Boyle has psycho-sexual issues. Boyle有性心理障碍
[00:47] Old news. 旧消息了
[00:48] But you calling Holt “Daddy”… 但是你叫Holt”爸爸”
[00:50] Hey, “Daddy” is not on the table here. 喂 现在说的可不是”爸爸”
[00:53] But you did call him “Dad,” Dude. 但是你确实叫他”老爸”了 伙计
[00:55] You shut up. You’ve done nothing but lie since you got here. 你闭嘴 你在这儿除了撒谎啥都没干
[00:57] All right, all right, I was lying about the holdup. 好吧好吧 关于持枪抢劫我是撒谎了
[00:58] But the dad thing, that happened. 但是你叫老爸这事儿是真的
[01:00] Aha! 啊哈
[01:01] He admitted that his alibi was a lie. 他承认他的辩解是说谎
[01:03] It was a trap, all part of my crazy, devious plan. 刚刚是个陷阱 是我疯狂邪恶计划的一部分
[01:07] – I believe you. – Thank you. – 我相信你 – 谢谢
[01:09] Son. 儿子
[01:11] Do you want to talk about it later 你想待会儿谈谈这事吗
[01:12] over a game of catch? 警察抓小偷游戏结束后
[01:15] I’d like that. 正合我意
[01:36] Thank you for coming in on your day off. 休息日你们能来 非常感谢
[01:38] I know you’d all rather be at home, binge watching media content. 我知道你们都想窝在家里享受<媒体盛宴>
[01:41] Oh! I just started the second season of media content. 哦 我刚开始看<媒体盛宴>第二季
[01:45] No spoilers. 不准剧透
[01:46] But these evaluations are important. 但是这些评估很重要
[01:48] Sir, I think I speak for all of us… 长官 我想代表大家说句话
[01:50] She doesn’t. 她完全不代表
[01:52] When I say that we can’t wait for you to sit in judgment of us. 我是说我们迫不及待想听到你关于我们的评判
[01:56] Oh, these will be self-evaluations, Santiago. 哦 这次是自评 Santiago
[01:58] Why… se. 怎么能这
[02:00] Very wise, sir. 这么棒 长官
[02:02] Nice save. 改得漂亮
[02:04] Also, please stay out of the way of the weekend squad. 还有 别打扰那些周末班组的
[02:06] They are on duty, and the bullpen is theirs. 他们值班 办公室就是他们的
[02:08] I hate the weekend squad. 我讨厌那些周末班组
[02:10] Detective Lohank shaves at my desk Lohank探员在我桌子上刮胡子
[02:12] and gets hair all over my computer. 毛掉的一电脑都是
[02:13] My “R” Key is jammed with stubble. 我的R键都被胡茬卡住了
[02:15] Well, that explains the email you sent about the “Guesome mude.” 怪不得邮件你发成”Guesome杀恩案”
[02:19] Dismissed. 解散
[02:21] I’m pumped for these evaluations, sir. 这些评估让我好激动啊 长官
[02:23] I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about my squad. 我迫不及待想听听你怎么评价我的班组了
[02:25] I think they’ve had a great year. 我觉得他们这年干得不错
[02:27] I feel like a proud mama hen 我觉得自己像是一只自豪的老母鸡
[02:29] whose baby chicks have learned to fly. 小鸡宝宝正在学习如何飞翔
[02:31] Interesting analogy, sergeant. 有趣的类比 队长
[02:33] Chickens are famously bad at flying. 众所周知鸡不太会飞
[02:35] Yo. 哟
[02:36] Peralta asked to be first, Peralta要求第一个来
[02:38] which shows how seriously he’s begun taking his job. 显示了他对待工作的认真程度
[02:40] Nope, I just want to get this over with. 不是 我只想早点结束
[02:42] So I have 72 arrests, 我逮捕了72人
[02:43] an 80% clearance rate, 破案率有80%
[02:46] but most importantly, 最重要的是
[02:48] I wore a tie sometimes. 我时不时会戴领带
[02:50] Now, I have a question for you: 现在 我要问的是
[02:51] Is there any way I can borrow $430,000? 我怎么才能借到43万美金
[02:54] Why on earth do you need that much money? 你要那么多钱干嘛
[02:56] I need to buy my apartment. 我要买下自己的公寓
[02:58] I’ve been living at my Nanna’s place 自从奶奶去世后
[02:59] since she passed away ’cause it’s rent-controlled, 我一直住在奶奶的合作公寓里 因为租金廉价
[03:01] but now the building’s going co-op, 现在那房子要被收回了
[03:03] so I have to buy it. 所以我要买下来
[03:04] I need to secure a loan by the end of the day. 到截止日期前我要弄到贷款
[03:07] Uh, so should we do a wire transfer, 所以我们是线上汇款呢
[03:09] or do you think cash is easier? 还是现金交易方便些呢
[03:10] Let’s just do cash. 现金吧
[03:11] Shouldn’t you be asking somebody else for that kind of money? 你不应该找找别人要大额贷款吗
[03:14] Like a bank? 比如说 银行
[03:15] Yeah, I tried that. 是 我试过了
[03:23] Jake, I cannot believe you’re gonna lose Nanna’s apartment. Jake 我不敢相信你要失去你奶奶的公寓了
[03:26] We grew up together. We used to hang out there every day after school. 我们一起长大 每天放学后都在那儿玩耍
[03:29] That’s right, because there was no one to look after us, 是的 因为没人看管我们
[03:32] because our moms both worked, and… 因为我俩的妈妈都要上班 还有
[03:35] We didn’t have fathers 我们没有爸爸
[03:37] because divorce. 因为离婚
[03:38] Peralta, I will not give you a cool half meal Peralta 我不会因为你略显凄惨的童年
[03:40] because you had a slightly sad childhood. 就给你残羹剩饭的施舍
[03:42] Go solve your housing crisis. 自己解决你的住房危机
[03:45] Can I go with him? 我能和他一起吗
[03:46] Nanna made me the intelligent, sensuous woman I am today. 是他奶奶塑造了今天美丽智慧的我
[03:50] Weird way to describe a grandma’s influence on you. 这样描述奶奶给你的影响可真诡异
[03:53] I’m sorry, Gina. 抱歉 Gina
[03:54] I don’t know that we can spare you. 没人能替你的活
[03:55] Um, these are her notes so far. 目前她就记了
[03:57] “Empanadas, Atlantic city, birth control.” “馅饼 大西洋城 避孕”
[04:00] No, that’s my travel journal. 那是我的旅游日记
[04:01] I haven’t started on the notes yet. 我还没有开始记呢
[04:03] You may go with Peralta. 你和Peralta一起去吧
[04:05] – Thank you. – Thank you. – 谢谢 – 谢谢
[04:07] I want to take Vivian somewhere romantic tonight. 今晚我想带Vivian去些浪漫的地方
[04:09] How about this? 这个怎样
[04:10] Graziolo’s, 格拉齐奥洛餐厅
[04:11] for the porco digestivo meal. 猪猪消化晚餐
[04:14] It’s a culinary tour of a pig’s digestive track. 以猪的消化系统为食材的美食之旅
[04:17] Pig bung gelato for two, anyone? 两人份的盲肠冰淇淋 有人要吗
[04:19] Uh-oh, heads up. 哦 注意
[04:21] Weekend crew. 周末组来了
[04:26] I feel sad for you. 真替你难过
[04:28] I love my desk buddy. 我爱我的办工桌伙伴
[04:29] Sometimes Detective Kearns and I leave presents for each other. 有时候Kearns警探和我互留礼物
[04:34] Yeah. 是
[04:35] Well, Lohank’s a stubble monkey. Lohank就是一留胡茬的猴子
[04:36] I hate him and his face garbage. 我讨厌他 还有他一团糟的脸
[04:38] Why don’t you just tell him to stop shaving at his desk? 干嘛不告诉他别在桌子上刮胡子了
[04:40] He denies even doing it. I don’t know why. 他不承认 我不知道为什么
[04:42] Next time I catch him shaving, 下次我要抓个正着
[04:43] I’m gonna punch him so hard in the mouth 我要朝他嘴上狠揍一拳
[04:45] he bites his own heart. 让他痛彻心扉
[04:47] Could that be why he denies doing it? 这大概就是为什么他不肯承认的原因吧
[04:49] Oh, yeah, you could be right. Yeah. 对哦 可能是这样
[04:52] Oh, wow. 哇
[04:54] It is always so crazy coming back here. 回到这里感觉太好了
[04:57] Remember when Nanna got cable? 还记得奶奶家装有线电视时
[04:59] We watched house party 2 so many times. 我们看了<家庭派对2>好多遍
[05:02] It was a pajama-jamma-jam. We had no choice. 那次睡衣派对啊 我们没有其他选择
[05:04] – Our hands were tied. – I gotta say, – 我们手绑在一起 – 我得说
[05:05] I’m psyched to be hanging like this, old-school stylez. 跟你待在这里真有趣 就像小屎候
[05:08] “Stylez” With a “Z”. 小屎候 不是小时候
[05:09] Oh, I could tell. 我听得出来
[05:10] Okay, well, maybe we can figure out a way for you 好了 也许我们能想出办法
[05:12] to afford this place. 让你能买下这里
[05:14] Where’s all your bank statements? 你的银行对账单呢
[05:15] Hup, hup, before we get all financial, 等等 别急 财政问题开始前
[05:17] can I interest you in an ice-cold foh-dy? 你要来瓶冰镇啤酒吗
[05:20] A’ight. 好哒
[05:22] So talk to me, goose. 回答我 Goose(<壮志凌云>经典台词)
[05:24] How we lookin’? 我们咋样
[05:25] Sexy, but not like we’re trying too hard. 很性感 但完全不是有意为之
[05:27] Like, sure, we’re trying, 我们的确是在装酷
[05:28] but it’s almost effortless. 但是显得自然潇洒
[05:30] Yeah, no, I knew all of that. 不 这些我知道
[05:31] I meant the money thing. 我是说钱的事情
[05:32] Oh. My first impression 哦 我的第一印象是
[05:34] is that you have a debilitating spending problem. 你有花钱大手大脚的毛病
[05:37] Jake, you have six massage chairs. Jake 你有六张按摩椅
[05:39] Well, they don’t make a massage couch. 谁让他们不生产按摩沙发的
[05:41] Okay, but you also have three turntables. 好吧 你还有三个电唱盘
[05:44] Ooh, yeah! I’m learning how to spin. 是啊 我在学习打碟
[05:46] Check it out. 来瞅瞅
[05:51] All I have are my grandma’s old klezmer records, 我只有奶奶的老犹太歌曲唱片
[05:54] and I still haven’t quite figured out how to sync up the beats, 也没搞懂怎么合上拍子
[05:56] but it’s not bad, right? 但还凑合 对不
[05:57] It’s awful! 糟透了
[05:59] It sounds like Joy Behar falling down some stairs. 听着像Joy Behar从楼梯上摔下来
[06:02] Okay, you also purchased olympus Has Fallen on demand 12 times. 你还点播了12次<奥林匹斯的陷落>
[06:07] Was it a difficult movie for you to follow? 这电影你看不懂吗
[06:10] No, just watched it a lot. 不 就是看了很多遍
[06:11] So hit me. 好了 摊牌吧
[06:13] How much do I have to cut back in order to keep this place? 要是我想留着这房子 得节约多少开支
[06:15] Infinity percent. 百分之无穷大
[06:17] Technically speaking, you’re bankrupt, kiddo. 事实上 你已经破产了 老兄
[06:20] That sounds bad. 听着很糟啊
[06:21] It is bad. 非常糟
[06:22] I only said “Kiddo” To soften the blow, kiddo. 我喊”老兄”只是为了减轻对你的打击 老兄
[06:27] This is so unfair. 这太不公平了
[06:28] I’ve lived in this building 15 years, 我在这房子住了15年了
[06:30] and then all of the sudden, they decide they’re going co-op with zero warning? 一夜之间 招呼都不打一声就要被收回了
[06:33] It seems illegal they didn’t tell you this was happening. 不事先通知的话好像是违法的
[06:35] Well, it’s possible I missed a letter, 其实 可能是我错过了通知
[06:37] but I doubt it. 不过也不一定啦
[06:38] Ooh, let’s check the mail tub. 对了 去翻翻邮缸
[06:40] Mail tub? 邮缸
[06:41] Nope. No. 不 不是
[06:43] No. 不是
[06:44] See? It’s impossible to find anything in here. 瞧见没 在这儿要找东西根本不可能
[06:46] It’s not my fault. 可不能怨我
[06:47] This is actually a cool little bathroom. 这个小浴室其实挺酷的
[06:49] Nice claw-foot tub. 这么赞的猫爪浴缸
[06:51] Which I will never throw my mail into again. 我再也不会往里面扔信件了
[06:53] Unless… 除非
[06:55] I didn’t want to do this, but I do know one way we could get the money. 我不想出此下策 但确实有个筹钱的方法
[06:57] You’d make a decent prostitute. 你当鸭会很不错
[06:59] I’d make an amazing prostitute. 我当鸭会一炮而红
[07:01] But I was actually talking about this guy I know, Frank. 其实我是想说 我认识个叫Frank的家伙
[07:04] He’s kinda skeevy, but he will loan money to anybody. 他有点让人讨厌 但是会给任何人放贷
[07:07] So he’s a loan shark. 所以他是个放高利贷的
[07:08] Maybe you’re not thinking this through. 或许你还没想清楚
[07:10] Says the woman who’s been engaged eight times. 这话竟然出自订婚八次的女人之口
[07:12] Uh, but never married once. 但我没结过一次婚
[07:14] Game, set, match…Linetti 时 间 到 我赢了
[07:16] Well, it’s the only choice I have. 好吧 我别无他法了
[07:18] So let’s go. 所以 走起
[07:20] Sir, I know we got off to a weird start, 长官 我知道开头不太顺利
[07:23] so to get things back on track, 为了让一切回到正轨
[07:25] I’d like to bring in Santiago next. 我想下一个让Santiago来
[07:27] She’s had a great year. 过去一年她成绩斐然
[07:28] You wanted to see me, sirs? 长官 你们想见我
[07:29] I was reading the sergeant’s lips through the window, 我刚才隔着窗户读警长的唇语
[07:31] and he either said, “Bring in Santiago next,” 他要么说了”下一个让Santiago来”
[07:34] or something about a San Diego nest. 要么说了”下个上帝压狗来”啥的
[07:36] Are you ready for your self-evaluation? 你的自我评估准备好了吗
[07:38] I am. 准备好了
[07:40] I understand from a lip-reading session last week 根据上星期读的一次唇语 我了解到
[07:43] that you intend to ask us each ten questions. 您打算问我们每人十个问题
[07:47] Normally, yes, 一般人是
[07:48] but for you, I have just one question. 对于你 我只有一个问题
[07:52] What is your biggest… 说说你最大的
[07:54] Flaw? 缺点
[07:56] My biggest flaw? 我最大的缺点
[07:59] Working too hard? 工作太认真
[08:02] Being too thorough? 太细心
[08:05] Caring too much? 太热心
[08:08] Got it. 懂了
[08:09] Something entirely different. 完全不是这些
[08:14] Rosa, look! Rosa 快看
[08:15] Lohank is shaving right now. Lohank在剃胡子了
[08:29] Noooo! 不 要 啊
[08:35] Boyle, call an ambulance. Boyle 去叫救护车
[08:36] I’m gonna do some stuff to him. 我要对他采取点措施了
[08:37] Or we give him a taste of his own medicine. 或者 以其人之道还治其人之身
[08:40] We fill his locker with shaving cream and loose hair. 在他的储物柜里塞满剃须膏和碎毛发
[08:43] I like it. 我喜欢
[08:44] I cannot believe I am considering a non-violent option. 不敢相信我竟然会考虑非暴力措施
[08:48] And I know just where to get a bundle of loose hair. 而且我知道从哪里搞到一堆碎毛发
[08:51] How much interest do you charge? 你要收多少利息
[08:53] Look, I’m not a bank. 听着 我不是银行
[08:55] It’s my own personal money. 这是我的私有资金
[08:56] So I take a larger vig. 所以抽头要得高
[08:59] 20 points 20个百分点
[09:00] A “Vig.” So cool. 抽头 太酷了
[09:01] Well, I don’t need much. 其实 我借得不多
[09:02] Just, like, $430,000. 大概 只要43万美金
[09:05] Nah, too much. 不 太多了
[09:06] I make small loans to desperate losers. 我做小额贷款 给那些绝望的失败者
[09:10] And friends, like you. 以及像你这样的朋友
[09:11] Well, I’m happy this went terribly. 好了 很高兴这一切很不顺利
[09:14] Uh, we do have to go now, so please excuse us. 我们得走了 失陪
[09:16] Wait, I just need enough to show the co-op board 等一下 我只要够钱向合作公司理事会
[09:18] I can make a down payment at the bank. 证明我能向银行付清首付就行
[09:20] How about $20,000? 两万美金怎么样
[09:21] Two bags of ziti? 两袋通心面
[09:23] That I can do. 这个没问题
[09:25] “Bags of ziti?” “通心面”
[09:26] Come on, Gina, how awesome is that? 来吧 Gina 多赞呀
[09:28] Get on board. 入伙吧
[09:29] Come on, Gina. Get on board. 来吧 Gnia 入伙吧
[09:31] Jake, he is a sea witch in disguise. Jake 他是一个伪装的海巫
[09:34] Do not sing into his shell. 别被卖了还替他数钱
[09:35] I have no idea what you’re talking about right now. 我不知道你刚说的什么
[09:38] Oh, little mermaid. 哦 可怜的小美人鱼
[09:40] What have you done? 你干的什么蠢事
[09:46] Nothing gets you smiling like cold-blooded vengeance. 冷血复仇是让你微笑的不二法门啊
[09:50] And now, the piece de resistance. 现在 上主菜
[09:54] A magnificent bag of hair. 一大包头发
[09:57] Oh, this is disgusting. 呃 真恶心
[10:00] It’s perfect. 真完美
[10:02] Ooh, check… check this out. 哦 看 看这个
[10:08] I’m Tom Selleck. Park my chopper on the beach. 我是Tom Selleck 我的直升机停在沙滩上
[10:12] I’m a Billy goat. 我是一头公山羊
[10:19] Oh, I think I swallowed a bunch of stranger hair. 我刚刚吞了一坨陌生人的头发
[10:24] Mr. Henders, the King of the lobby. Henders先生 公寓之王
[10:26] Jake, the co-op board meeting was an hour ago. Jake 合作公司理事会会议是一小时前的事了
[10:29] I know. I am so sorry. 我知道 非常抱歉
[10:31] It’s just I’ve been pretty busy with police work, you know, 只是因为警务缠身 你懂的
[10:34] with my police friends, 和我的警局小伙伴
[10:36] helping out non-police folk such as yourself, 帮助像你这样的平民百姓
[10:38] keeping you safe police. 保证你们安全
[10:40] We appreciate your service. 感谢你们的服务
[10:41] And I appreciate you saying that. 感谢您的夸奖
[10:43] Look, I know there’s been a lot of misconceptions about my financial situation, 听着 我知道有很多关于我财政状况的误解
[10:46] but I am ready to put that to rest right now. 但是我准备好让那些都消停了
[10:49] – Boom goes the dynamite. – Oh, my God. – 出大招 美金炸弹接好 – 天呐
[10:50] That’s $20,000 right there, 这是两万美金
[10:52] and I intend to use it as a down payment on a mortgage. 我打算用它做按揭的首付
[10:55] Where did you get this money? 你从哪弄来的钱
[10:56] Just had it lying around. 以前就有了
[10:57] You’ve been an adequate tenant. 你已经有资格租这个房子了
[10:59] – Adequate. – But we needed a completed application – 有资格 – 但是最迟今天提交完整的申请
[11:01] with a bank loan by today. 附带银行贷款证明
[11:02] With all due respect, sir, that’s not fair. 恕我直言 先生 这不公平
[11:04] I mean, I didn’t even know that the building was going co-op until last week. 我是说 上周我才知道这房子要被合作公司收回了
[11:07] I got one letter. 我只收到了一封通知信
[11:08] We left you 15 voicemails as well. 还有15条语音留言
[11:10] Ah, voicemails. Well, that explains it. 啊 语音留言 怪不得
[11:12] My generation mostly texts. 我这代人喜欢发短信
[11:14] I’m only 33, so… 我只有33岁 所以
[11:15] We’re in the same generation. I’m 31. 我们是一代人 我31岁
[11:17] 31? Mm-hmm. 31岁
[11:18] But I call you “Mister.” 但是我叫你”先生”
[11:20] And you wear a suit, and… 你穿这身西装 还有
[11:23] That. 这个
[11:24] Did you just point at my bald spot? 你这是在指我的秃顶吗
[11:26] – No. – Look. – 没 – 听着
[11:27] We’re putting the apartment on the market. 我们要把公寓放到寻租市场
[11:29] We need to get it ready for brokers to show. 要准备妥当交给中介来宣传
[11:31] We need you out by next friday. 下周五前你要搬出去
[11:32] Ohhh, next friday’s a little tough for me. 下周五我有点不方便
[11:35] Is there any way we could move it to the sunday after eight years from next friday? 有可能改到八年后的下周日吗
[11:40] Based on your judge-y eyes, 有鉴于你这鄙视的眼神
[11:41] I am going to take back my dynamite. 我还是收回我的美金炸弹吧
[11:44] Un-boom. 大招收回
[11:46] Un-boom. 收回
[11:47] You got a full head… Head of hair. 你头发挺 茂盛的
[11:49] – Nope. – Okay. – 别 – 好吧
[11:55] Aw. That bad? 噢 行不通吗
[11:57] I’m gonna be homeless. 我要无家可归了
[11:58] A homeless cop. 无家可归的条子
[11:59] It’s like a made-for-TV movie 就像电影电视里演的一样
[12:01] that I will not be able to watch 可惜我看不了
[12:02] because I won’t have a television 我要没电视了
[12:03] because I’ll be homeless. 没家哪来电视
[12:05] Chin up, lil’ pup. 振作一点 傻小子
[12:06] First of all, you could watch it on your phone. 首先 你可以用手机看啊
[12:08] Second, this isn’t the only apartment in the city. 其次 又不是只有这一套公寓可以住
[12:11] We’ll find you a new one. 再给你找一套就好了
[12:12] You’re right. 说得对
[12:14] You’re right. This could be good. 你说得对 太对了
[12:16] I mean, maybe we’ll find a great place. 兴许我能找到更好的呢
[12:17] – Atta girl. – In a cooler neighborhood. – 对 妞 – 在一个更棒的社区
[12:19] That’s right, girl. 是呀 妞
[12:20] Maybe I’ll even have a cute neighbor. 兴许还有个可爱的邻居
[12:22] Get it, girl. 就是这样 妞
[12:23] You gotta stop calling me girl. 别叫我妞了
[12:25] Sorry, girl. 抱歉 妞
[12:27] Okay, sirs. 行了 长官
[12:28] I know why you weren’t happy with my self-evaluation. 我知道你为什么不喜欢我的自评
[12:31] You didn’t want me to say a flaw that was actually positive, 你不希望我说那些文过饰非的缺点
[12:33] like how the sergeant always says it’s bad that he works out too much. 就像警长老说自己健身太多是很糟糕的事情一样
[12:37] Whoa. Why the drive-by? 喔 干嘛要说到我
[12:39] Sorry. 抱歉
[12:40] But that’s not right, 不过那是不对的
[12:41] because you value honesty and humility above all else. 因为您一直标榜要诚实谦逊为先
[12:45] So what’s your biggest flaw? 那么你的最大缺点是
[12:47] My biggest flaw. 我的最大缺点
[12:48] I’m too competitive, prone to jealousy, 我太争强好胜 善妒他人
[12:50] “Bit of a killjoy, 有点不解风情
[12:52] “Follow rules to a fault, 墨守陈规
[12:53] “Don’t know how to relax, 不善言笑
[12:54] and every now and then, I smoke a cigarette.” 而且时不时总抽烟
[12:59] Is that what you’re looking for? 你是要这效果吗
[13:00] Because I can keep going. 我还能继续的
[13:01] I am deeply flawed. 我浑身都是缺点
[13:03] – Santiago… – Oh, no. – Santiago – 噢 不好
[13:05] “Santiago” In “B” Flat. 你降低声调说我名字
[13:06] You’re disappointed. 你失望了
[13:08] Okay, well, 好吧
[13:09] I’m going to go to a secret location 我要去秘密地点
[13:11] and make sure that nobody is smoking there. 去查查有没有人在那里抽烟
[13:12] I’ll be right back. 很快回来
[13:15] Is this a pre-war? 这是战前建筑吧
[13:17] Ah, very good eye. 眼力劲不错
[13:18] And you should know it’s also pet-friendly. 告诉你 这里可以养宠物的
[13:20] Really? Do they allow cats? 是吗 可以养猫吗
[13:23] I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic. 你这算是挖苦吗
[13:25] Okay. 好吧
[13:26] How would you even get a bed in here? 床都放不进怎么睡啊
[13:29] Oh, Murphy bed. 折叠床嘿
[13:32] Voila. 瞧
[13:33] Nope. 别了
[13:34] This is kinda cool. 这很炫酷哎
[13:36] High ceilings, so many windows. 层高很高 窗户又多
[13:39] Gina, the toilet is in the middle of the living room. Gina 厕所在大厅中央
[13:42] I think it’s sexy. 我觉得很性感哎
[13:48] So when’s this going down? 什么时候能见他遭报应
[13:48] Well, normally, Lohank hits the locker room when he goes to the gym, 通常 Lohank去健身房时就会去开柜子的
[13:51] so let’s see when he plans on working out. 去看看他啥时候会去健身呗
[13:54] So, Lohank, I was reading an article Lohank 我读到篇文章
[13:56] about the benefits of exercise… 讲健身的好处的
[13:58] You going to the gym today? 你今天去健身房吗
[13:59] Not today. Been spending all my breaks on the phone with my wife, Nancy. 今天算了 刚在电话上和我老婆Nancy吵了好几次
[14:02] We’ve been having marital problems. 我们婚姻有问题
[14:04] Right, ’cause of your hygiene? 是吗 因为你不讲卫生吗
[14:05] What? No, I wish. 啥 我倒想
[14:08] No, about a year ago, she fell down the stairs 一年前 她从楼梯上摔下
[14:10] and broke her back. 伤了她的背
[14:11] Oh, no. 哦 不是吧
[14:12] Now she’s addicted to painkillers. 现在她有止痛药上瘾的问题
[14:14] We’ve been fighting a lot. Mm. 我们一直吵啊吵
[14:16] ‘Cause I want to help her, you know? 我只是想帮助她 懂吗
[14:18] I guess I just love her so much. 我猜我只是爱她太深
[14:20] But she’s refusing treatment. 可她却放弃治疗
[14:23] We got into it again last night. 昨晚我们又吵上了
[14:25] I went out for some fresh air, 我出去透了口气
[14:27] but I forgot to close the door, 却忘了关门
[14:29] and our dog cinnamon got out. 我们养的狗桂桂跑出去了
[14:30] Oh, no. 喔 不是吧
[14:31] Cinnamon got hit by a drunk driver. 桂桂被一个醉驾的家伙撞了
[14:33] I wish I could say she was put out of her misery instantly, 我真希望桂桂的痛苦能快点了结
[14:36] but the vet assured us that her suffering was unending and terrible. 但是兽医说她受的苦 持续又加剧
[14:42] I’m sorry. 抱歉
[14:43] Just venting a little. I-I appreciate… 我情绪有点止不住 我想你们能
[14:44] Of course. 当然
[14:47] Anything for a good friend like you. 有困难尽管找我们
[14:48] Charles, can I see you for a minute? Charles 能单独和你聊聊吗
[14:50] Yep. 好
[14:51] My first question is, 首先我有个问题
[14:53] why are the two of you doing this self-evaluation together? 你们干嘛要一起做自评
[14:56] Scully doesn’t handle pressure well. Scully应对不了太大压力
[14:58] Um… 嗯
[15:00] – Um… – Not to brag, – 嗯 – 不是我自夸
[15:02] but Scully and I have a combined total of 14 arrests. Scully和我总共加一块儿抓捕成功14次
[15:06] Would’ve been 20, but we only got 14. 本来会有20次的 不过只有14次算数
[15:09] That’s not enough arrests. 这个数字哪够
[15:10] Well, no one asked you. 没人问你意见啊
[15:11] It’s a self-evaluation. 不是自评吗
[15:13] Come on, Scully. 走吧 Scully
[15:19] I’m trying to hurry, 我想快点来着
[15:20] but when you grab the hair, it breaks apart. 但是一抓头发它们就散开了
[15:22] The key is you use your hands like scoopers. 要领是手要像铲子一样使
[15:24] Just go… 这样
[15:27] What the hell is going on here? 你们这是在做什么啊
[15:29] I’m sure there’s a reasonable explanation for this, sir. 我相信一定有合理解释吧 长官
[15:31] Uh, we accidentally dropped all our loose hair and shaving cream in this locker, 我们不小心把自己的毛发和剃须膏落到这个柜子里了
[15:35] so we’re cleaning it out. 所以我们要清洁下
[15:36] Hasn’t Detective Lohank been through enough? Lohank探员还没遭够罪吗
[15:38] He just got diagnosed with prostate cancer. 他刚刚拿到诊断说有前列腺癌
[15:40] Course he did. 他是受够了
[15:41] Clean this up. Now. 现在给我搞干净
[15:44] Yes, sir. 是 长官
[15:49] What’s wrong with you guys? 你们什么毛病
[15:50] I’ve lost control of my squad. 我快对自己班组失去掌控了
[15:53] Should we turn some lights on? 我们不能开灯吗
[15:55] Trying to save electricity, Gina. 要省电啊 Gina
[15:57] Your massage chair is on. 你还开着按摩椅呢
[15:58] Yeah, I’m poor. I’m not a savage. 我穷不代表我是野人
[16:00] Man, what am I gonna do? 天 我该怎么办
[16:02] Well, what if I bought the apartment? 不如我买下这公寓
[16:04] What are you talking about? 你说什么呀
[16:06] And then I could rent it to you till you find a new place. 那样我就可以租给你直到你找到新公寓
[16:08] What? 啥
[16:09] How could you afford this place? 你怎么买得起这地方
[16:11] Have you been dealing drugs? 你贩毒吗
[16:12] No, I’m thrifty. 我很节俭好不好
[16:13] I cut my own hair. I walk to work. 我自己理发 上班用走的
[16:16] I eat Scully’s lunch every day. 中午我就吃Scully的午饭
[16:17] I’ve rented the same crap box since I was 20 我从20岁起就租住在一个蜗居没动过
[16:20] ’cause it’s so cheap. 就因为便宜
[16:22] I’ve saved up money, 我钱都省下来了
[16:23] and I’m looking for a real estate opportunity. 我在房地产里找投资机会
[16:25] Ew. A real estate opportunity? 唷 房地产投资机会
[16:28] Are you being serious? 你认真的吗
[16:29] We were drinking 40’s this morning. 今早我们还一起喝瓶装啤酒呢
[16:31] I’m saying I could give you a fair rent 我是说我可以给你开个公道的租金
[16:32] because I would be your landlady. 因为我要做你房东啊
[16:34] Whoa, whoa, you be my landlady? 你要做我房东
[16:36] You’re Gina. 你是Gina吧
[16:37] Your lifelong dream is to be on wife swap. 你的终身梦想是要玩换妻
[16:40] You call gum “The dentist.” 你管口香糖叫”牙医”
[16:41] You think Ray J is a national treasure. 你觉得Ray J是国宝人物
[16:43] Yeah, so what? I’m eclectic. 那又怎样 不拘一格就是我
[16:45] You’re not better than me, okay? 你不比我好 好吗
[16:48] And I’m glad that I still own this place 我很高兴自己还是这里主人
[16:50] because I can happily invite you to leave. 因为这样我就能请你离开了
[16:52] Grow up, Jake. 长大吧 Jake
[16:55] “Grow up, Jake.” “长大吧 Jake”
[16:56] Oh, my goodness. 天呐
[16:58] Yeah, thanks for your help. 对对 谢谢你帮忙哦
[17:00] Old-school styles. 就像小时候
[17:02] I take back the “Z”! 我不和你说”小屎候”了
[17:07] Whoa, you okay? 你还好吗
[17:08] Yep. 好
[17:09] Just checking out my new bedroom. 就是查看下我的新卧室
[17:12] Oh, good. 很好
[17:13] It feels like scoliosis 睡着好似脊柱弯曲
[17:15] and smells like 10 million butts. 闻着好似无数屁香泛起
[17:17] I take it your apartment thing didn’t work out. 我看是你公寓的事搞砸了吧
[17:19] When did everyone decide to become an adult? 什么时候起大家都决定要做成年人了
[17:21] I mean, I know you were born in your fifties, but come on. 我知道你一出生就50岁了 但是拜托
[17:23] Thanks? 谢谢
[17:24] Get this. 听好了
[17:24] Gina just offered to buy Nana’s apartment Gina提出买下我奶奶的公寓
[17:27] as a real estate opportunity 作为房地产投资机会
[17:29] and become my “Landlady.” 并成为我的房东
[17:30] – Jake… – I know. – Jake – 我懂
[17:31] She was just trying to help, 她只是想帮忙
[17:32] but we’ve known each other since we were kids, 但我们打小就认识
[17:34] you know? 知道吗
[17:35] I got her her job. 我帮她找到这份差事
[17:36] Which an ice cream cone could do, by the way. 就连冰激凌筒都能干她的活
[17:38] And now I find out she’s been saving all these years? 现在呢 我却发现她这些年一直在省钱
[17:41] – Jake… – I know. – Jake – 我懂
[17:42] The person that I’m really mad at is myself 我其实只是在气自己
[17:44] for screwing this whole thing up. 不争气搞砸一切
[17:46] I gotta talk to Gina. Thanks for your help, Amy. 我去找Gina谈谈 谢谢你帮忙 Amy
[17:48] Didn’t say anything, don’t want credit in case it goes wrong. 我一句也没说 别归功于我 也别归罪于我
[17:50] Yeah, that’s smart, given my track record. 想想我以前做的事儿 你算聪明的
[17:52] Hey, wait. 等一下
[17:54] What would you say Holt thinks my biggest flaw is? 你觉得Holt会觉得我最大的缺点在哪里
[17:56] Who care what Holt thinks? 谁管Holt怎么想
[17:57] What’s most important 最重要的是
[17:59] is what I think your biggest flaw is. 我觉得你最大缺点是什么
[18:01] And there are so many to choose from… 那可是有一大堆缺点可选
[18:02] Too competitive, prone to jealousy, 争强好胜 善妒他人
[18:05] bit of a killjoy, 不解风情
[18:06] your shame cigarettes. 你还是大烟枪
[18:07] – Oh, my God. – But your biggest flaw is… – 天呐 – 但是你最大的缺点是
[18:10] You suck at throwing away your secret lists. 你无法神不知鬼不觉的丢掉秘密笔记
[18:16] Well, that was fun today. 今天真有趣
[18:17] Although I’m pretty sure I caught some form of face lice from that bag of hair. 尽管我确信自己从那堆头发上染了些虱子
[18:21] Being a cop is dangerous. 警察可是高危职业
[18:22] Although I knew that going in. 不过我还是入警了
[18:24] Yeah, it was fun. Hey, you wanna grab a drink? 是挺有趣 要喝一杯吗
[18:26] Oh, shoot, I would, but I’m meeting Vivian 哦 我想啊 但我约了Vivian
[18:27] for that romantic pig colon dinner. 吃浪漫猪大肠盛餐
[18:29] Hey, Rosa. 嘿 Rosa
[18:31] I want to apologize. 我想道歉
[18:32] I haven’t been much fun to hang out with 过去的一年里和我在一起
[18:34] over the last year or so 都是很无趣的事
[18:35] on account of all the asking you out 你看我 老约你出去
[18:36] and smelling your hair 闻你头发
[18:37] and staring at you from point-blank range. 还近距离盯着你看
[18:39] – Yeah, you were a real weirdo. – Mm-hmm. – 是 你就是个怪人 – 嗯
[18:41] But you’re pretty cool 不过你也很酷
[18:42] now that you’re in love with someone else. 现在你爱上别人了
[18:44] Have a nice dinner. 祝你晚餐愉快
[18:45] Oh, we will. 哦 一定
[18:47] They make a sorbet out of the tail. 他们用尾巴做了冰糕呢
[18:48] See ya. 回见
[18:51] Excuse me, Captain. 抱歉 警监
[18:54] What are you doing, sergeant? 你干嘛 警长
[18:55] I’m going to yell at you, 我要好好说说你
[18:57] and I don’t want Santiago to read my lips. 又不想Santiago读我唇语
[18:59] Excuse me? 什么
[19:00] You were completely unfair to my squad today. 你今天对我的班组成员完全不公正
[19:03] Santiago is one of your best detectives. Santiago是你手下最好的警探之一
[19:06] And all you wanted to do was play mind games with her. 你却只和她玩心理游戏
[19:09] Scully and Hitchcock only arrested 14 people, Scully和Hitchcock抓了14个罪犯
[19:11] but that’s 8 more than last year. 这可比去年多了8个
[19:13] They only arrested 6 people last year? 他们去年只抓了6个吗
[19:15] And I know Peralta can be childish, 我知道Peralta小孩子气
[19:17] but he leads the precinct in collars, 但在咱这片区的领头人
[19:18] and he’s grown up a heck of a lot since you got here. 自从你来了以后他可是长大了不少
[19:21] Okay, sit down, sergeant. 好了 警长 坐下说
[19:22] I’m going to do your evaluation now. 现在我要给你做评估
[19:28] Sergeant Jeffords, Jeffords警长
[19:30] you’re right. 你说得对
[19:31] I have been hard on the squad. 我对手下很严厉
[19:33] You’re a good leader. 你是个好领导
[19:34] And just the fact that you’re willing to stand up for them 你能站出来为他们说话这点
[19:37] is one of the reasons they respect you so much. 是他们敬重你的原因之一
[19:40] I could learn something from you. 我能从你身上学到很多
[19:42] You have every right to feel like, um, 你有资格感觉自己是 呃
[19:45] um, what was it you said this morning? 你早上怎么说来着的
[19:47] Proud mama hen, sir. 自豪的老母鸡 长官
[19:49] A proud… 自豪的
[19:50] Mama hen. 老母鸡
[19:57] What do you want, Jake? 你要干嘛 Jake
[19:58] I’m watching Oprah’s legends ball, 我在看<奥普拉传奇人物舞会>
[19:59] which is what I do every time a close friend hurts my feelings. 每次被密友伤了心后必看节目
[20:03] I came here to apologize. 我是来道歉的
[20:06] Look, I was mad at you for being more together than me, and that’s not fair. 听着 因为你比我更稳重我就生你气 对你是不公平的
[20:10] I felt stupid, so I acted out. 我觉得自己很蠢 所以我出格了
[20:12] I’m sorry. 对不起
[20:12] Yeah, you were stupid, 是啊 你是很蠢
[20:14] and you should be sorry, Jake. 你也应该觉得抱歉 Jake
[20:16] But watching Oprah have brunch with her strong woman friends 不过看奥普拉和她最好的女性朋友们一起吃早午餐
[20:21] has taught me that it’s okay to forgive. 教会了我要能原谅他人
[20:23] Great. 很好
[20:24] Also, you should buy Nana’s place. 还有你该买下我奶奶的公寓
[20:26] Not for me. 不是为我
[20:27] You should live there. 你该住那里
[20:28] You love that apartment, and you said so yourself. It’s a great investment. 你喜欢那里 你自己都说这是笔好投资
[20:31] Where are you gonna live? 那你住哪里
[20:32] Here. 这儿
[20:33] I’ll sublet from you. 你从你这里转租
[20:34] I actually ran the numbers. 我算了一下
[20:36] I’d keep paying the same amount of rent, 我付的房租是一样的
[20:37] and you would turn a small profit. 而你可以有笔小赚头
[20:39] It’s a starter apartment, and it’s my fault for starting when I’m 33. 这只是起步公寓 是我不该33岁才开始起步独立
[20:44] – You have a deal. – All right. – 一言为定 – 好
[20:46] Shake, shake. 握手手吧
[20:47] Yes! 好耶
[20:49] Hello, Detective. 你好 警探
[20:50] Is there a reason you’re interrupting me mid-soup? 你打断我喝汤 是有什么原因吗
[20:54] Yes. 有
[20:54] I’m ready for my self-evaluation. 我准备好自评了
[20:58] So I asked Peralta 我问了Peralta
[20:59] what you thought my biggest flaw was, 你会觉得我的最大缺点是什么
[21:00] and he said, “Who cares what Holt thinks?” 他说”谁管Holt怎么想”
[21:04] That’s not surprising. 这不奇怪
[21:05] He’s very disrespectful. 他很不尊敬我
[21:06] But he’s not wrong. 不过他是对的
[21:07] My biggest flaw is that I care too much what you think of me. 我最大的缺点就是太在意你怎么看我了
[21:11] I should be more confident in my own judgment, 我应该对自己的判断有自信
[21:13] and I am so sure of that, 这点我就很自信
[21:15] I don’t even care if you think I’m right. 我都不在意你觉得我对不对
[21:17] Evaluation over. 评估完毕
[21:19] Enjoy your soup. 好好喝汤吧
神烦警探

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