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生活大爆炸(The Big Bang)第8季第22集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计

Posted on July 8, 2024 By taiciben_script_user No Comments on 生活大爆炸(The Big Bang)第8季第22集台词本阅读、下载和单词统计
时间 英文 中文
[00:03] It’s, like, the best one they make, 这款是市面上最棒的一台了
[00:05] I just can’t get it to work. 可怎么弄都飞不起来
[00:06] I’ll figure it out. 我来弄吧
[00:07] It streams HD video straight to your phone while it’s flying. 这玩意能边飞边串流高清影片到你手机上
[00:10] Nice. 赞
[00:11] Where were you when I was single? 我单身的时候 这小宝贝在哪呢
[00:16] Okay, we should leave in about an hour. You all packed? 我们一小时内就得出发 你东西收拾好了吗
[00:19] Uh, yeah, I just need to throw in a few last minute things– 差不多 出发前再加几件东西进去就行
[00:21] you know, makeup, underwear, clothes. 就化妆品 内衣裤 衣服那些
[00:25] If your bathroom floor counts as a carry-on, 如果你的浴室地板能算手提行李
[00:27] you’re packed. 那你算收拾完毕了
[00:30] Leonard, have you ever given a high school commencement speech before? 莱纳德 你以前有在高中毕业典礼致辞过吗
[00:32] Nope. It’s pretty exciting. 没有 挺让人激动的
[00:34] Aren’t you afraid of being blinded? 你不怕被弄瞎吗
[00:37] How would I be blinded? 我为什么会被弄瞎
[00:38] At the end of the ceremony, 在毕业典礼的最后
[00:40] all the students throw those pointy hats in the air. 学生都会把四方尖角帽抛上天空
[00:44] It’s all pomp and circumstance until someone loses an eye. 场面还会挺有气势 直到有人被戳瞎眼
[00:48] I’ll take my chances. 我乐意赌一把
[00:50] Fine. 随你
[00:51] I wonder if they make “I told you so” cards in braille. 你说有没有卖”我早说了”的点字版卡片
[00:56] Look, the problem with commencement speeches 毕业典礼演讲最大的问题是
[00:58] is that they’re boring. 都很无聊
[01:00] Ooh, do you own a T-shirt cannon? 你有能发射T恤的T恤大炮吗
[01:03] Why would he own a T-shirt cannon? 他没事为啥会有T恤大炮
[01:05] I don’t know. Why do I own one? 不知道啊 但为啥我有咧
[01:08] I think it’s really nice 我觉得你很贴心
[01:09] that you’re sharing this experience with Penny. 愿意带佩妮分享这样的机会
[01:11] Mm, I thought it’d be fun 我觉得带她去
[01:12] to show her my old stomping grounds. 我的母校地盘看看 应该蛮有意思
[01:14] I even know the exact spot where they used to stomp me. 我还记得我是在哪块”地盘”被人踩呢
[01:19] Well, now you get to go back as a successful scientist. 但现在你能以成功科学家身份衣锦还乡啊
[01:21] With a beautiful girl on your arm. 手里搂着美女
[01:23] And a pointy hat sticking out of your eyeball. 眼里还插着一顶四方尖角帽
[01:53] How’d you get ready so fast? 你怎么能这么快就准备好呢
[01:55] Oh, I pack light. 我轻装上阵嘛
[01:56] Once, I got through an entire spring break 有一年的春假
[01:58] with nothing but a long T-shirt and a belt. 我回家就带了一件长T恤跟腰带
[02:01] Why did you need a belt? 你为啥会需要腰带
[02:03] It’s called an evening look. 那叫晚装好吗
[02:06] I’ve never been to New Jersey before. 我从来没去过新泽西呢
[02:08] It gets a bad rap from shows 电视节目把它名声搞臭了
[02:10] like Jersey Shore and Real Housewives. 比如《泽西海滩》或《贵妇的真实生活》
[02:10] 《泽西海滩》讲八名男女去泽西海岸打工 玩乐 《泽西贵妇的真实生活》就是有钱人在秀下限
[02:12] So it’s not really like that? 所以实情不是那样吗
[02:13] No, it’s like that. 没 还真的就像那样
[02:17] Well, I’m excited to show you around. 但还是很期待能带你到处看看
[02:19] You think we’ll have time to visit your mom over there? 你觉得我们会有时间去探望你妈吗
[02:21] Yes. 有啊
[02:21] We’ll also have time to put my junk in a garlic press, 还时间把我的鸡鸡放进压蒜器呢
[02:24] but I’m not doing that either. 但我也不会因为有时间就做啊
[02:31] I just got an alert. 刚收到短信提醒
[02:32] Our flight’s been canceled. 我们的班机被取消了
[02:33] What? 什么
[02:34] Yeah, looks like there’s a big storm all up the East Coast. 东海岸这里好像有个很大的台风
[02:38] Well, can we get on another airline? 能换别家的班机吗
[02:40] I don’t think so. 貌似不行
[02:41] So, that’s it? We’re not going? 所以就这样 不去了吗
[02:44] I guess not. 看来是
[02:45] – Well, that sucks. – Yeah. -也太衰了吧 -是啊
[02:47] I worked hard on that speech, too. 我可是非常认真准备这段致辞呢
[02:49] Oh. You could tell it to me. 你可以念给我听啊
[02:51] Oh, thank you, but I’m okay. 谢谢啊 不过不用啦
[02:53] Are you sure? 你确定吗
[02:54] I could pretend I’m a high school cheerleader 我可以假装我是高中拉拉队长
[02:55] who can’t control herself around esteemed alumni. 对成功的校友没有任何抵抗力哦
[03:00] Greetings, distinguished cheerleaders. 杰出的拉拉队员们 你们好吗
[03:06] Okay, the WiFi extender is on, the camera’s on, 无线网扩展器开启了 摄像机也开启了
[03:08] they’re both on the same network; 而且两者都连到了同个网
[03:09] we should be getting an image. 我们应该能收到画面了啊
[03:11] All I see is a black screen. 我只能看到黑色的屏幕
[03:13] And my own reflection. 以及我自己的倒影
[03:16] I look sad. 我看起来好伤心
[03:20] Maybe we should recalibrate it. 可能我们得重新校准一下
[03:21] All right. 好吧
[03:22] Step one: rapidly flip the calibration switch 第一步: 快速扳动校准开关
[03:25] from the fully up to the fully down 从最上方扳到最下方
[03:26] positions for at least ten times. 此动作最少重复十次
[03:29] It actually says “at least”? 上面真写了”最少”吗
[03:32] Yeah. 对啊
[03:33] Why would they say “at least”? 它为啥会写”最少”啊
[03:34] Is it ten toggles? 那到底是扳十次
[03:36] Is it 100 toggles? You know? 还是扳一百次呢
[03:38] Is it 1,000 toggles? 还是扳一千次
[03:40] 10,000 toggles? 一万次呢
[03:41] – 100,000 toggles? – Sheldon! -还是十万次 -谢尔顿
[03:45] You see where I’m going with this. 你懂我接下来要说的是什么
[03:48] Just flip the switch 你就快点扳就是了
[03:49] until the lights on the drone change to solid yellow. 直到无人机的灯变成长亮的黄色
[03:53] All right, that seems simple enough. 好吧 这步看起来不难
[03:54] Initiating calibration sequence. 启动校准程序
[03:57] One, two, three, four, 一 二 三 四
[04:00] five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. 五 六 七 八 九 十
[04:06] Well, I suppose ten is technically “at least ten.” 看来技术上来说 十等于”最少十下”
[04:12] But they’re still getting at least one angry letter. 但他们”最少”会收到一封愤怒的投诉信
[04:16] Now I rotate it horizontally 现在沿着中轴
[04:19] on its center axis until the lights turn green. 水平旋转它 直到灯号变成绿色
[04:23] Initiating rotation sequence. 启动旋转程序
[04:27] Don’t look at me, initiate. 看我干嘛 启动啊
[04:33] What does red and yellow mean? 这红跟黄灯代表什么意思
[04:35] It means the calibration failed. 代表校准失败
[04:36] We have to start over. 我们得从头再来
[04:38] Oh. Very well. 好吧
[04:39] Reinitiating calibration sequence. 重新启动校准程序
[04:42] One, two, three, four, 一 二 三 四
[04:43] five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten… 五 六 七 八 九 十
[04:49] …eleven. 十一
[04:55] It’s a good thing I didn’t send that letter. 还好那封信我没有寄出
[05:04] Hello, Daddy. What’s up? 老爸 最近还好吗
[05:05] Not much, just wanted to see how my son’s doing. 还行 就想看看我儿子最近好不好
[05:08] Very well, thank you. 很好啊 谢谢关心
[05:10] Are you still dating that dermatologist? 你还在跟那位皮肤科医生约会吗
[05:12] If you could feel how soft my skin is, 如果你能摸到我的皮肤多柔嫩
[05:14] you wouldn’t have to ask. 你就不会问了
[05:18] Oh, and there’s something else I wanted to ask you. 我还有另一件事想问你
[05:20] Why did you spend a month’s rent on a toy helicopter?! 你为啥把一个月的房租钱拿去买玩具飞机
[05:26] Oh, you’re where that bill goes. 原来那张账单是寄给你了啊
[05:29] I’m tired of indulging your foolish lifestyle. 我受够了纵容你的白痴生活
[05:31] It’s time you learned responsibility. 是时候让你学会负起责任了
[05:33] And the only way to teach you that 而唯一能教会你这事的方法
[05:34] is to cut off your allowance. 不再给你零用钱
[05:36] No, Daddy, no! 不行 爸 不行
[05:38] There are lots of other ways to teach me responsibility. 能让我学会负责任的方法多了去了
[05:40] I know, you can give me an egg 比如你可以给我颗鸡蛋
[05:42] and make me take care of it for a week! 让我照顾好它整整一周啊
[05:45] No, my mind is made up. 不必了 我已经决定了
[05:47] Starting now, you’re on your own. 从现在开始 你自食其力吧
[05:48] But, Daddy, I-I miss my family so much, 可是爸比 我好想家人
[05:52] and with you and Mummy getting a divorce, 你跟妈咪又离婚了
[05:54] I feel sad and empty. 我好不开心又好空虚
[05:56] Buying a little toy every now and then 偶尔买个小玩具
[05:59] helps me fill that void. 能帮助我填满心中的空虚
[06:01] So while I can’t hug you every day, 所以尽管我不能天天拥抱你
[06:03] flying that helicopter… 飞那台直升机…
[06:04] I’m cutting you off. 我要断了你
[06:07] Just to be clear, financially or mid-sentence? 我确认一下 是断钱 还是挂断电话
[06:12] No red and yellow, 别跳红黄灯啊
[06:14] no red and yellow. 别跳黄红灯啊
[06:16] – It’s green! – Yay! We did it! -变绿了 -我们成功了
[06:20] God, if it’s this much fun to rotate, 天啊 光捧着转就这么有意思
[06:22] imagine when we fly it. 等飞起来还得了
[06:24] Okay, now all I have to do is rotate it vertically 好了 现在我只需垂直旋转机体
[06:27] until the lights turn off. 直到绿灯熄灭
[06:30] Oh, no! 不
[06:33] All right, playtime’s over. 好了 娱乐时间结束
[06:36] Let’s open this baby up. 咱们把这宝贝拆开吧
[06:38] Won’t that void the warranty? 拆开就不能保修了
[06:39] Sheldon, I have a master’s degree in engineering. 谢尔顿 我有一个工程学硕士学位
[06:44] I wipe my bottom with warranties. 保修卡只配给我擦屁股
[06:49] Except for AppleCare. 苹果的保修除外
[06:50] That pays for itself in the long run. 从长远来看 维修费很快会回本
[06:56] Hey, where’d you go? 你去哪儿了
[06:57] I got you a little something to cheer you up. 我给你买了点东西 让你开心开心
[07:00] Really? 真的吗
[07:01] Sex last night, pancakes this morning– 昨晚的爱爱 今早的饼饼
[07:03] Am I dying? 我这是要死的节奏吗
[07:06] Just open it. 快打开看看
[07:09] A cap and gown? 四方帽和长袍
[07:10] Why do I need a cap and gown? 我为什么会需要这俩玩意
[07:11] Because you are giving your commencement speech. 因为你要在毕业典礼上致辞
[07:14] What are you talking about? 你在说什么呀
[07:15] I called your old high school 我打给你以前的高中
[07:17] and convinced them to let you give your speech over Skype. 说服他们让你通过视频聊天在典礼上致辞
[07:20] Really? 真的吗
[07:21] That’s amazing! 太棒了
[07:22] And you gave me the robes to give it in. 你还特意买了长袍让我致辞时穿
[07:24] Thank you. 谢谢
[07:25] Yeah, now about those– 对哦 关于长袍我有话说
[07:26] uh, they came from a costume shop, 这是我在一家道具店买的
[07:28] and all they had left was sexy graduate, 店里只剩下性感毕业生装束了
[07:30] so they… 所以长袍…
[07:32] might be a little short. 可能会有点短
[07:35] – Short and sexy, that’s my wheelhouse. – Yeah! -又短[矮]又性感 我的强项嘛 -没错
[07:47] Boy, oh, boy, that’s a lot of pieces. 哎呀呀 零件还真多呀
[07:51] You know what they all do, right? 你都知道是干嘛的 对吧
[07:53] Yes, of course. 当然 那还用说
[07:55] What about this one? 那这个是干嘛的
[07:57] Well, I… how familiar are you 这个嘛…你熟不熟
[07:59] with miniaturized integrated logic circuits? 小型集成逻辑电路呢
[08:02] Not very. 不太熟
[08:02] That right there is a miniaturized integrated logic circuit. 那你手里拿着的正是这玩意
[08:09] So, can you get it working? 那你能修好它吗
[08:10] I’m an MIT-trained engineer. 我可是麻省理工毕业的工程师
[08:13] I’ve built components for the space station. 我还为太空站出过一份力呢
[08:16] I thought the zero-gravity toilet didn’t work. 我还以为那个零重力厕所不能用呢
[08:19] It worked fine, 能用好吗
[08:21] it just wasn’t designed for Russian cosmonauts 只不过设计不适合俄罗斯宇航员
[08:24] and their potato-based diet. 以及他们的全是马铃薯的饮食
[08:27] Hey, guys. 你好啊
[08:28] Hello. 你来啦
[08:29] I have to return the helicopter. My father… 我得把直升飞机退了 我爸…
[08:31] What did you do?! 你俩干了什么好事
[08:36] Well, don’t worry. 别担心
[08:37] He went to MIT. 他是麻省理工毕业的
[08:38] He can solve any problem, 他可以解决任何问题
[08:40] as long as it doesn’t originate in a Russian man’s colon. 只要不是来自俄罗斯人的结肠就行
[08:50] I don’t freaking believe this! 真他妈不敢相信
[08:51] Relax, it’ll be fine. 别紧张 能装回去
[08:53] No, you have to put this back together right now, 不是 你现在必须装回去
[08:55] so I can return it! 我才能拿去退
[08:56] You can’t return it. 你退不了了
[08:58] Howard wiped his bottom with the warranty. 霍华德用保修卡擦屁股了
[09:02] What?! 什么
[09:03] I think metaphorically. 我猜他可能只是打个比方
[09:05] But he was in the bathroom for a while. 但他刚真进了厕所好一会呢
[09:09] Howard, my father cut me off. 霍华德 我爸不给我零用钱花了
[09:11] I have to get my money back for this! 我得把这玩意退了 把钱拿回来
[09:12] Calm down. 冷静
[09:14] Okay. 好吧
[09:15] Okay, you’re right. 好吧 你是对的
[09:17] It’s time for me to step up 我是时候站出来
[09:18] and take responsibility for my life. 为自己的人生负责了
[09:21] Be a man. 当个爷们
[09:25] Hello, Mummy. 妈咪是我啊
[09:28] Hello, Rajesh. 拉杰什呀
[09:29] What a nice surprise. 这通电话真让我惊喜
[09:31] Well, I’ve been thinking about you. 我一直很想你
[09:33] How are you doing? Are you happy, Mummy? 你好吗 你快乐吗 妈咪
[09:36] Such a sweet boy for asking. 乖儿子 真关心我
[09:38] Can’t believe you come from the poison seed of your father. 真不敢相信你是来自你父亲的毒种
[09:42] Well, I like to think I take mostly after you. 我觉得我比较随你
[09:45] Anyway, speaking of Daddy, 对了 说起爸爸
[09:46] I had a very strange conversation with him. 我们刚进行了一次非常奇怪的通话
[09:48] He said he couldn’t afford to send me money anymore 他说以后没钱打生活费给我了
[09:51] because of his active social life. 因为他有活跃的社交生活
[09:54] What does that mean, “active social life”? 这话什么意思 “活跃的社交生活”
[09:57] Well, let’s not talk about him 好啦 咱们别聊他了
[09:59] or whatever shenanigans he may or may not be up to. 谁在乎他有没有在密谋什么诡计啊
[10:01] Let’s talk about you. 咱们来聊聊你吧
[10:03] Rajesh, is your father seeing someone? 拉杰什 你爸是不是跟人约会了
[10:06] All I know, Mummy, is that he’s a single wealthy doctor, 妈咪 我只知道他是一个单身多金的医生
[10:09] and now, for some reason, 而现在出于某种原因
[10:10] there’s no money for your little boy. 突然没钱给你的宝贝儿子了
[10:16] Well, however much money your father was giving you, 好 不管你老爸之前给你多少钱
[10:18] I’ll give you more. 我给你更多
[10:19] Thank you, Mummy, I love you! 谢谢妈咪 我爱你
[10:21] Helicopters for everybody! 一人一台直升机
[10:26] What’s taking so long? 怎么这么久啊
[10:27] I don’t think this is gonna work. 我觉得这么穿不行
[10:29] Just let me see. 出来给我看看
[10:37] Sweetie, you know you’re supposed to wear clothes 亲爱的 毕业长袍里
[10:39] underneath a graduation gown. 应该穿上衣服
[10:41] A: surprised you know that. 首先 我很惊讶你知道这点
[10:44] B: I wanted to look like a sexy graduate for you. 其次 我想让你觉得我是一个性感毕业生
[10:48] Well, you do. 你成功了
[10:49] – Thank you. – Yeah. -谢谢 -好啦
[10:52] You’re gonna be on Skype; they’re not gonna see your legs. 反正你是视频语聊 他们也看不到你的腿
[10:55] Well, I’m gonna go put on some pants just in case. 以防万一 我还是穿上裤子吧
[10:57] But I have to say, this is very freeing. 但我要说一句 这样穿真的好”解放”
[11:02] Add a belt and I’ll take you someplace nice. 系条腰带 我就带你去个好地方
[11:06] Done and done. 没问题
[11:14] Okay, I think I’ve narrowed it down 好了 我已经把故障缩小到
[11:17] to a faulty pin on the onboard communication chip. 飞机通讯芯片上一个错误的针脚
[11:20] Very impressive. 真厉害
[11:23] You know, when you’re done with that, 等你修完那台
[11:25] can you look at this? 可以看下这台吗
[11:29] It doesn’t make smoke anymore. 它不会冒烟了
[11:31] One toy at a time. 一个个来
[11:33] Mm. Sorry. 抱歉
[11:34] Ah, maybe it’s for the best. 或许这样最好
[11:36] I hear locomotive smoke 我听说火车头的烟
[11:38] is the second leading cause of death among train aficionados. 是火车宅们第二大死因
[11:42] What’s the first one? 第一大死因是什么
[11:43] Suicide. 自杀
[11:46] Wrong. 错
[11:47] Obesity. 肥胖
[11:51] I have the tool you wanted. 我把你要的工具拿来了
[11:53] Thank you. 谢谢
[11:54] You guys don’t have to go to the trouble. 你们其实不必这么费劲
[11:56] I’m back in the money now; 哥现在又有钱了
[11:57] I can just buy another helicopter. 再买一台就好啦
[11:59] It’s not about the money. 重点不是钱
[12:00] It’s about solving a problem. 而是解决问题
[12:01] It’s why I became an engineer. 这是我当工程师的初衷
[12:03] It’s what I like to do, it’s what I’m trained to do. 我喜欢做这个 我学的也是这个
[12:05] It’s who I am. 这就是我
[12:06] Oh, look at you– the little engineer that could. 瞧你 小工程师做到了
[12:12] Why don’t you just call tech support? 为什么不找技术支持呢
[12:14] – Hey! – Not cool! -说啥呢 -太逊了
[12:16] What? 怎么了
[12:17] There’s two kinds of people in this world: 这个世上有两种人
[12:19] those who call tech support 打给技术支持求助的人
[12:20] and those who make fun of the people who call tech support. 与嘲笑前者的那种人
[12:24] I call tech support all the time. 我就每次都打给技术支持啊
[12:26] – You call tech support! – What a baby! -你居然找技术支持 -真没用
[12:30] And now, for our commencement address, 现在 我们的毕业典礼演讲
[12:33] one of our most distinguished alumni, 邀请到了我们最杰出的校友之一
[12:35] noted Caltech physicist Dr. Leonard Hofstadter. 加州理工名物理学家莱纳德·霍夫斯塔德
[12:44] Members of the faculty, students, 各位教员 各位同学
[12:46] I’m excited to speak to you today. 我今天很高兴能为大家致辞
[12:49] I can’t help but remember the last time I was in this auditorium. 我脑海中一直想起上次来这礼堂的情景
[12:52] Two guys from the lacrosse team 两个长曲棍球队的人
[12:54] played keep-away with my asthma inhaler. 拿我的气喘药吸入器当球打 不让我接
[12:57] But enough about my ten-year reunion. 我毕业十年同学会的事就不讲了
[13:02] I’d also like to take a moment 我也想再花点时间
[13:03] to thank my beautiful fiancee 感谢我美丽的未婚妻
[13:05] for to helping make this speech possible, 即使在天气不允许的情况下
[13:07] even though weather nearly prevented it. 仍将不可能变成现实
[13:10] Oh. Hello. 大家好啊
[13:11] I-I didn’t know he was gonna point it at me, 我不知道他会把镜头转过来
[13:13] so… 所以…
[13:14] don’t do drugs and stay in school. 别吸毒 别辍学哦
[13:16] They’re graduating. 他们要毕业了
[13:17] Okay, bye! 好吧 再见
[13:21] All right, the power supply is reconnected. 好了 电源供给重新连接上了
[13:23] I think we’re back in business. 我觉得我们能出征啦
[13:24] Let’s just run a few tests before we take it outside. 在出征前 先做几个测试
[13:27] Sheldon, we got WiFi? 谢尔顿 网连上了吗
[13:28] Check. 已连上
[13:29] GPS? 全球定位系统呢
[13:30] Check. 已定位
[13:30] Battery charged? 电池充满了吗
[13:31] Check. 已充满
[13:32] Four hours of our lives gone? Check. 四小时的生命浪费掉了吗 已浪费
[13:36] All right. All systems go. 好的 各系统准备工作就绪
[13:38] In five… 倒数五秒
[13:39] …four, three, two, one. 四 三 二 一
[13:47] That’s what my train used to do. 我的小火车以前也能这样
[13:53] Ready to call tech support? 准备好打给技术支持了吗
[13:55] Give me the number. 电话给我
[13:58] Probably wind up talking to some foreign guy 打了估计也是某个咖喱国的客服
[14:02] who’s reading from the same manual I have. 看着同样的说明书机械化地回答问题
[14:14] It’s my father, you jerks. 我爸打来了 都怪你们俩混蛋
[14:20] Hello, Daddy. 爸比 怎么了
[14:21] What did you say to your mother? 你跟你妈妈说了什么
[14:22] Nothing. 没有啊
[14:23] I was just calling to check in, 我就打给她问个好
[14:25] make sure she’s doing okay. 看看她最近怎么样啊
[14:26] Well, after talking to you, 她跟你说完电话后
[14:27] she seems to think I’m some sort of playboy. 她貌似觉得我是个风流浪子
[14:31] Really? 真的吗
[14:32] I don’t know where she’d get an idea like that. 我不知道她怎么会产生这种想法
[14:35] You know mummy and her crazy imagination. 你也懂妈咪这人 还有她常会乱想
[14:38] I’m so lucky I take after you. 我觉得我能随你真是太幸运了
[14:41] You think you take after me? 你觉得你是随我吗
[14:44] Well, I try to. 我尽量这么想啊
[14:46] I certainly wouldn’t be a scientist 如果不是有你做榜样
[14:47] if you hadn’t been my role model. 我也不会去当科学家
[14:52] Who wants to go to Vegas in a real helicopter?! 谁想坐真的直升飞机去拉斯维加斯
[14:59] It was L. Frank Baum who said, 弗兰克·鲍姆曾说过
[15:01] “No thief, however skillful, can rob one of knowledge, “多厉害的小偷 都无法偷走别人脑中的知识
[15:06] and that is why knowledge is the best and safest treasure.” 所以知识是最棒最安全的宝藏”
[15:11] Wow, I’m boring myself. 我自己听了都觉得无聊
[15:17] Sorry, I can’t see any of your faces right now, 抱歉 我现在看不到你们的表情
[15:19] but I bet they look like this. 但我猜大概是这样
[15:25] Uh, you know, I-I wrote an entire speech 其实 我写了整篇致辞
[15:29] to say how high school prepares you 要说高中让你准备好面对未来
[15:32] and what a wonderful place it is, 以及高中有多美好
[15:34] but I hated it. 但其实我超讨厌高中
[15:37] Maybe high school’s great if you look like this… 或许有人高中过得很开心 前提是你长这样…
[15:42] …but I didn’t even feel like I existed at that school. 但其实我当年觉得自己超没存在感
[15:47] And now that I think about it, 现在我仔细一想
[15:49] I bet a lot of you feel the same way. 我猜你们很多人也有这种感觉
[15:51] So, for the remainder of my speech, 所以我接下来的致辞
[15:56] this is for the invisible kids. 要献给没有存在感的孩子们
[15:59] Uh, maybe you never fit in. 或许你在学校格格不入
[16:02] Or maybe you’re the smallest kid in the school, 或许你是学校里最矮小
[16:04] or the heaviest or the weirdest. 最胖的 或最怪的孩子
[16:06] Maybe you’re graduating 或许你都要毕业了
[16:07] and you still haven’t had your first kiss. 可到现在初吻还在
[16:10] By the way, 19; 比如我是到19岁
[16:12] and Geraldine Coco, wherever you are, thank you. 洁拉尔丁·珂珂 无论此时你在哪 谢谢你
[16:18] Maybe you don’t have any friends. 或许你没有任何朋友
[16:19] And guess what? That’s okay. 其实 这根本无所谓
[16:22] While all the popular kids are off doing– 尽管那些人缘好的孩子们都去干…
[16:25] whatever, I don’t know what they were doing 其实我也不知道他们去干嘛了
[16:26] ’cause I was never there… 因为我没机会去
[16:28] I’ll-I’ll tell you later. 我 我等会告诉你
[16:31] My point is, 但我的重点是
[16:33] while you’re spending all this time on your own, 那些你独自一人度过的时间
[16:35] building computers or practicing your cello, 比如组装电脑 或练习大提琴
[16:39] what you’re really doing 其实你真正在做的是
[16:40] is becoming interesting. 让自己变有趣
[16:43] And when people finally do notice you, 等有天别人终于注意到你时
[16:46] they’re gonna find someone a lot cooler than they thought. 他们会发现一个比他们想象中更酷的人
[16:49] And for those of you who were popular in high school, 至于那些高中人缘好玩得开的同学
[16:52] it’s over, sorry. 好日子到头了 抱歉
[16:55] Thank you and congratulations. 谢谢各位 恭喜你们毕业
[17:02] Your call is important to us. 你们的来电对我们十分重要
[17:04] All our technicians are busy helping other customers. 目前我们所有的技术人员都在忙
[17:07] Please stay on the line 请稍作等待
[17:08] and someone will be with you shortly. 很快就有人来为你们服务
[17:21] What happened to me? 我这是怎么了
[17:25] When did I become an old man 我什么时候变成了老人
[17:27] baffled by modern technology? 被现代科技所困惑
[17:31] Next thing you know, 接下来
[17:32] I’ll be hitching my pants up to my armpits 我估计就要穿高到我腋下的高腰裤
[17:34] and complaining about 然后骂骂咧咧
[17:36] the awful music the kids are listening to. 现在小孩听的音乐有多难听了
[17:39] It is awful, isn’t it? 的确是很难听啊 对吧
[17:42] Listen to that noise. 你们听听这噪音
[17:48] Hang on, hang on. 等等 等等
[17:49] It’s working! I did it! 它好了 我成功了
[17:51] How’d you do that? 你怎么做到的
[17:52] No idea, but I did it! 不知道啊 但我成功了
[17:56] Maybe you shouldn’t be flying it inside. 不应该在室内飞吧
[17:58] Well, I’m not flying it! 不是我控制它
[17:59] Then who is? 那谁在控制
[18:00] I don’t know! 我不知道
[18:01] Must be getting a WiFi signal from somewhere else! 肯定是从别的地方接收到了无线信号
[18:07] Initiate landing sequence! Initiate landing sequence! 启动降落程序 启动降落程序
[18:11] Hey, the camera’s working! 摄像机也能用了呢
[18:12] Oh, look, it’s me. 看 是我呢
[18:17] Tech support, can I help you? 这里是技术支持部 有何能为您效劳
[18:18] Yes, it’s a robot uprising! Call the police! 机器人起义了 快打给警察
[18:30] So you really think they liked it? 你真觉得他们喜欢我的致辞吗
[18:31] Oh, sweetie, it was the best speech I… 亲爱的 这是我这辈子听过最棒的…
[18:37] Don’t worry, everyone in here is safe. 不用担心 我们里面的人都安然无恙
生活大爆炸

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