时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:03] | Forget about your white Christmas, folks. | 各位 忘了白色圣诞节吧 |
[00:05] | This holiday week, it’s gonna be a scorcher across the southland. | 今年的节日周 整个南部地区都是大热天 |
[00:09] | 90s at the beach, triple digits in the valley. | 海滩地带达到华氏90多度 山谷里更是达到三位数 |
[00:11] | Let’s hope Santa remembers to hydrate. | 但愿圣诞老人记得多喝水 |
[00:21] | Talk about a soccer mom on steroids. | 我们来谈谈一位服用类固醇的足球妈妈 |
[00:23] | Internet sensation, | 近期引发网络轰动的事件 |
[00:24] | Regina Bullock of Downey, | 来自唐尼的瑞吉娜·布洛克 |
[00:25] | also known as face-mask mom, is set to go | 外号”面罩妈妈” 今天将前往 |
[00:28] | before a Van Nuys judge today. | 范奈斯法院面见法官 |
[00:30] | Hey, hey! That’s me! | 嘿 是我啊 |
[00:31] | That’s my case! | 是我的案子 |
[00:32] | Bullock told authorities she had no choice | 布洛克对当局说 她当时别无选择 |
[00:34] | but to go after the child who had, according to Bullock, | 只能去找那个小孩算账 因为据她所说 |
[00:37] | face-masked her youngest child. | 那小孩把她的幼子摔了个狗吃屎 |
[00:42] | Mother’s like you are a menace to society. | 像你这样的母亲简直是对社会的威胁 |
[00:46] | Oh, no, no, no, I’m not the mom. | 不不不 我不是那个欺负小孩的妈妈 |
[00:48] | I’m the judge. | 我是她要见的法官 |
[01:12] | Oh, sure, send them through security | 当然了 又要过安检是吧 |
[01:13] | like they’re loaded down with knives. | 就好像里面装满了刀具 |
[01:15] | Show me a better kid anywhere. | 你去找个比他好点的孩子来 |
[01:16] | You know what? You can’t. | 其实 你根本找不到 |
[01:17] | That’s right. | 没错 |
[01:18] | Morning, Ray. | 早上好 雷 |
[01:19] | Oh, so nunchucks and heroin can just waltz on in? | 像这种吸毒小太妹就可以大摇大摆走进去吗 |
[01:22] | Why isn’t anyone stopping her? | 怎么没人拦下她啊 |
[01:24] | Deputy, do me a favor. | 法警 帮我个忙 |
[01:25] | Don’t bother putting the cooler through security. | 不用麻烦让那个冷冻箱过安检了 |
[01:27] | It’s banned. | 它被禁止入内了 |
[01:28] | Sorry, ma’am. Cooler’s not allowed. | 抱歉 太太 冷冻箱不准带进去 |
[01:30] | It’s 5,000 degrees out there. | 外面简直热的跟火葬场一样 |
[01:32] | What am I, supposed to leave a cooler full of ice and juice | 我难道该把一个装满冰块和果汁的冷冻箱 |
[01:34] | the back of my van? | 放在我的车后备箱里吗 |
[01:35] | You can leave it here if you like. | 你如果愿意也可以放在这里 |
[01:36] | Well, I don’t like. I don’t like it one bit. | 我不愿意 我一点都不愿意 |
[01:39] | And keep your mitts of my juice. | 别打我这果汁的主意 |
[01:40] | I know exactly how many are in there. | 我很清楚里面有多少瓶 |
[01:42] | 23. | 23瓶 |
[01:42] | – I had one. – 22. | -我喝了一瓶 -那就22瓶 |
[01:46] | Judy. | 茱迪 |
[01:46] | What’s up, TW? | 什么事 TW |
[01:48] | Okay, first of all, bad nickname, | 好吧 首先我必须说这昵称很差劲 |
[01:50] | it takes twice as long to say that as my actual name. | 发这个音要比念出我真正的名字还要费事 |
[01:52] | What are you doing? | 你在干什么呢 |
[01:53] | It’s like 1,000 degrees in this building. | 大楼里的温度简直像是有1000度 |
[01:56] | I’ve been put in charge of this year’s secret Santa. | 我被委任负责本年度的秘密圣诞老人工作 |
[01:57] | Just wanted to make sure that you were still in. | 我想确定一下 你依然会参加的 |
[01:59] | Yeah, but you should’ve done that like days ago. | 当然 但你几天前就该做好了才对啊 |
[02:02] | Christmas is Tomorrow. | 明天就是圣诞节了 |
[02:03] | Look, I know. | 听着 我知道的 |
[02:03] | Look, I live in an Indian neighborhood | 听着 我住在印度人聚居区 |
[02:05] | Christmas just kind of crept up on me. | 完全没意识到圣诞节突然就来了 |
[02:07] | Plus, two bailiffs are out sick. | 并且 有两名法警都请病假了 |
[02:08] | I’ve had to purell all the handcuffs by myself. | 我不得不一个人完成手铐清洗消毒的工作 |
[02:12] | Look, what do you say? | 话说 你意下如何 |
[02:13] | Let me think about it. Yeah, I’m in. | 让我考虑一下 好吧 我同意加入 |
[02:16] | Oh, hey listen, you sound really busy. | 对了 你听上去似乎真的超忙 |
[02:18] | I can take that off your hands if you want. | 如果你愿意 我倒是可以替你承担那个任务 |
[02:19] | I love secret Santas. | 我超爱秘密圣诞老人的 |
[02:21] | I can organize everything. | 我可以组织好一切 |
[02:22] | Are you serious? Really? | 你此话当真 真的吗 |
[02:23] | Yeah, you want it, you got it. | 行啊 你想上的话 就上吧 |
[02:25] | – Thanks Judy. – No problem. | -谢你了 茱迪 -没问题 |
[02:26] | All right. | 好咧 |
[02:28] | Look, before I forget, we’re having a block party | 听着 为免我将来忘了 我们街区三月份 |
[02:30] | in March for Rama Krishna Jayanti. | 会为纪念罗摩克里希纳神僧开个派对 |
[02:31] | Look, gonna be real cool. | 一定会很酷的 |
[02:33] | Very bahut mahan. | 非常性感撩人 |
[02:35] | Oh, yeah, get your butt out of my yogurt. | 对了 你的屁股别碰到我的酸奶 |
[02:38] | Good morning, judge Wright. | 早上好 莱特法官 |
[02:39] | As always, totally inappropriate outfit. | 一如既往地 你又着装不得体了 |
[02:41] | Thank you sir. | 谢谢你 老大 |
[02:42] | I got dressed in my truck this morning. | 我今早是在货车里换衣服的 |
[02:43] | It was touch and go whether I’d have botToms at all. | 当时不管裤子有没有穿上 都得赶时间 |
[02:46] | Well, we’re all grateful you did. | 我们都庆幸 你还是穿了裤子的 |
[02:47] | Although, it is unseasonably warm. | 不过 现在还这么热很反常啊 |
[02:49] | Sir, it’s Christmas eve! | 老大 今天可是平安夜啊 |
[02:51] | It’s too hot. We shouldn’t even be working. | 真是太热了 我们都该放假回家才对 |
[02:53] | We should be at the beach. | 我们该去海滩度假 |
[02:54] | Hey! Hey! Beach court. | 嘿 来个海滩法庭吧 |
[02:56] | Why isn’t that a show on mtv? | 怎么MTV电视台没推出这么一个真人秀 |
[02:58] | They don’t even play music anymore. | 他们那个台甚至都不播放音乐了 |
[02:59] | It’s very upsetting. | 令人很烦恼 |
[03:00] | So what are you doing for your Christmas adventure this year? | 你今年的圣诞大冒险活动是什么啊 |
[03:04] | life throwing? Running with the bulls? | 玩命 还是与公牛一起狂奔 |
[03:06] | It is not a Christmas adventure, all right? | 那不是什么圣诞大冒险活动 好吗 |
[03:08] | Every year on Christmas, I choose to give myself the gift | 每年的圣诞节 我选择送给自己的礼物 |
[03:11] | of doing something I’ve never done before. | 就是做一件以前从未做过的事 |
[03:14] | Oh, like clothed sobriety. | 比如正确着装 保持清醒 |
[03:15] | Well, I tried that once. I did not like it. | 我倒是试过一次 但一点都不喜欢 |
[03:17] | Well, as per usual, you are invited | 与往年一样 我今年依然 |
[03:19] | to join me and my family for Christmas dinner. | 邀请你和我的家人们一起吃圣诞餐 |
[03:21] | My son is back from college. | 我儿子从大学回来了 |
[03:22] | – Jesse? – Yup. | -杰西吗 -没错 |
[03:23] | Has he declared a major, yet? | 他选定专业了吗 |
[03:25] | Yup. Poetry. | 没错 诗歌学 |
[03:27] | Maybe he can come up with something | 或许他可以写出某首出名的诗 |
[03:28] | that rhymes with $60,000 a year. | 年薪能达到6万美金 |
[03:33] | Ugh, it’s hot in here, too? | 我这屋子里也这么热吗 |
[03:36] | Tedward? | 泰沃德 |
[03:37] | Down here, judge. | 在这下面呢 法官大人 |
[03:39] | What? | 什么 |
[03:41] | What are you doing down there? | 你躺在地上干什么啊 |
[03:43] | Hot air rises. | 热空气会上升 |
[03:44] | Cool air’s down here hanging with me | 冷空气在下面陪伴着我 |
[03:46] | Look, fact of the matter is, air conditioning is jacked | 听着 实际上是因为 整个法院楼 |
[03:49] | on this side of the courthouse. | 这部分的空调系统都坏了 |
[03:50] | No, not again, man. | 不 别又这样啊 |
[03:51] | What is it with these union guys? | 那帮工会的人是怎么回事啊 |
[03:53] | They protect this $60 thermostat | 他们保护那台就值60块的温度调节器 |
[03:55] | like it’s that big diamond with magical powers in mission: Impossible. | 跟《碟中谍》里保护那个有魔力的大钻石一样 |
[03:58] | Is that the plot? | 是这么个故事吗 |
[03:59] | Well, I don’t follow the plot. | 我才不管什么故事情节呢 |
[04:00] | I just go to watch Tom Cruise run around in his mom jeans. | 我只是去看汤姆·克鲁斯穿着妈妈牛仔裤的样子 |
[04:03] | So did they give you an ETA | 他们跟你说了 |
[04:05] | of when the a/c’s gonna be up and running? | 空调大约什么时候能恢复正常运转吗 |
[04:06] | Well, I filled out two requests, | 我提交了两份申请 |
[04:08] | both of them in quadruplicate. | 每个都是一式四份 |
[04:09] | Left three voicemails. Sent an email. | 留了三次言 发了一封电邮 |
[04:12] | Still got nothing back. | 依然未收到回复 |
[04:13] | Look, then I just tried to open a window– | 然后我试图打开一扇窗户 |
[04:15] | No. | 别 |
[04:16] | Ordinance 00-294. | 00-294号法令规定 |
[04:18] | All odd-numbered municipal structures zoned between ’46 and ’78 | 第46和第78大道间所有单号市政建筑 |
[04:21] | windows must be nailed shut due to jumpers. | 窗户必须紧闭 因为跳楼的人太多 |
[04:24] | Why do you know that? | 你怎么会知道这一条啊 |
[04:25] | Dude, my brain is a hoarder. | 老兄 我的大脑就是个知识存储器 |
[04:31] | What is on your mind, judge? | 你在想什么 法官大人 |
[04:32] | We got a high profile case with Tom, | 我们跟汤姆要处理个关注度很高的案子 |
[04:34] | a heat wave, no a/c, he’s gonna object to everything, | 热浪来袭 没有空调 他肯定会反对一切的 |
[04:37] | sweat through his suit, say he’s not hot when he is, | 汗流浃背 明明很热却嘴硬说不热 |
[04:40] | speak in tongues, maybe not speak in tongues, | 下意识地胡言乱语 或者也不会 |
[04:42] | and then drop like a drunk girl a coachella. | 然后像个喝醉的女孩一样倒下 |
[04:44] | Oh, he his definitely gonna speak in tongues | 他绝对会下意识胡言乱语的 |
[04:47] | and that’s gonna be the sweet spot of my day. | 那将会是我一天中最开心的时刻 |
[04:51] | – Let’s do this. – Let’s do it. | -开始吧 -开始吧 |
[05:03] | Judge, you’re making some mighty private sounds there. | 法官大人 你这是在叫床啊 |
[05:06] | Oh, Tedward, I feel like I’m in a beer commercial, | 泰沃德 我感觉就像在拍啤酒广告一样 |
[05:08] | and I never want to leave. | 我简直爽得不想走 |
[05:10] | Well, uh, judge responsibly, okay? | 要负责任地评判 好吗 |
[05:18] | Mrs. Bullock, it’s the court’s understanding that you’ve pl– | 布洛克太太 本庭所知的事实是… |
[05:21] | All right, look, Mrs. Bullock, whatever, I get it, all right? | 听着 布洛克太太 不管怎样 我懂的 |
[05:24] | You hear “all rise, ” you get up, you stand up, | 你听到全体起立 就该起身 站立 |
[05:26] | you realize I’m the judge you have to stand up for. | 你必须明白 你必须为我这个法官起身 |
[05:28] | What was it? Heroin and nunchucks? | 怎么 我是吸毒小太妹是吗 |
[05:30] | Something like that? | 就那么不正经是吗 |
[05:32] | Anyway, I bear neither grudges nor fools, so we’re all good. | 总之 我这人不记仇不记怨 我们之间没事 |
[05:36] | But you do have to acknowledge the court. | 但你必须尊重当庭的地位 |
[05:39] | Regina Bullock, it’s the court’s understanding | 瑞吉娜·布洛克 本庭已经知道 |
[05:41] | that you have pled “no contest” to california penal code 273-a, | 你针对加州刑法典273-A项提出不抗辩 |
[05:45] | misdemeanor reckless endangerment of a child, | 也就是鲁莽危害儿童的轻罪 |
[05:46] | is that correct? | 是这样的吗 |
[05:48] | – Correct. – She hit a kid! | -是的 -她打了一个孩子 |
[05:49] | Objection. | 反对 |
[05:51] | Oh, objection to this. | 该反对这种行为才对 |
[05:53] | You, over-ruled. And the same for you. | 你 反对无效 你也是 |
[05:54] | And to the shorties in the house, | 我想对在场的小矮人们说一句 |
[05:56] | there’s no booing, okay? | 法庭里是不准嘘人的 好吗 |
[05:57] | And there’s no cheering. | 也不准加油欢呼 |
[05:59] | And if you think I won’t cite a kid for contempt, | 如果你们觉得我不会判孩子藐视法庭 |
[06:01] | it’s on my bucket list. Try me. | 那绝对是我遗愿清单上的一项 有种你们试试 |
[06:05] | Counselor, what do you have to say for you client? | 律师 你代表你的委托人有什么想说的 |
[06:08] | Only that Mrs. Bullock witness her youngest child | 那只是因为布洛克太太看到自己的幼子 |
[06:10] | get face-masked by a much larger child. | 比一个比他大很多的孩子摔得狗吃屎 |
[06:12] | Mrs. Bullock then embarked on a brisk walk | 布洛克太太之后先进行了一顿疾走 |
[06:14] | before gently pushing the larger child to the ground. | 然后才轻轻地把那个大点的孩子推到了地上 |
[06:16] | The child, your honor, who was protected head-to-toe | 法官大人 那个孩子可是被防护垫 |
[06:19] | with regulation pads and a helmet. | 和头盔保护得严严实实的 |
[06:21] | Obction! He’s characterizing– | 反对 他是在主观… |
[06:22] | Sustained. I saw the video, counselor, all right? | 反对有效 我看了那段视频好吗 律师 |
[06:24] | Nody gets 9 million hits on youtube | 如果只是”轻轻地”做了什么 |
[06:26] | for doing anything “gently.” | 是不可能在Youtube有900万点击量的 |
[06:27] | Tedward, can you please do something about this heat? | 泰沃德 你能解决一下这高温问题吗 |
[06:34] | You can have my juice, sir. | 你可以喝掉我的果汁 大人 |
[06:37] | Fine. | 好吧 |
[06:40] | Fine. Fine. Let the cooler in. | 好吧 好吧 把冷冻箱拿进来吧 |
[06:43] | – Hey, judge. – Hey Judy. | -你好 法官大人 -你好 茱迪 |
[06:46] | I’m in charge of secret Santas. | 我今年负责秘密圣诞老人工作 |
[06:47] | Tedwd asked me. | 泰沃德求我的 |
[06:48] | Said he wanted the responsibility to go | 他说希望这份职责能转移到 |
[06:49] | to someone he finds attractive, blah, blah, blah– | 一个美女身上 什么什么的 |
[06:51] | I don’t know, I stopped listening. | 我也不知道 我后来都懒得听了 |
[06:53] | Anyway, here you go. | 总之呢 来吧 |
[06:54] | The rule is you have to drop off your gift Tomorrow. | 规则是 你明天必须把你准备的礼物放进去 |
[06:57] | No, look, it’s Christmas eve, Judy, | 不行 今天可是平安夜 茱迪 |
[06:59] | I have no time to shop for gifts. | 我可没时间去逛街买礼物 |
[07:01] | That’s not my fault, that’s on Tedward. | 那可不是我的错 你只能怪泰沃德 |
[07:02] | Look, there’s only one slip left. | 听着 里面只有一张纸条了 |
[07:05] | If you don’t take it, someone doesn’t get a present. | 如果你不拿的话 就有人收不到礼物哦 |
[07:07] | No present, imagine the heartbreak. | 没有礼物 想象下那个心碎吧 |
[07:09] | Do you really want to ruin someone’s Christmas | 你真想毁掉某个人的圣诞节吗 |
[07:12] | like some sweaty, red-glasses wearing grinch? I mean– | 你就像是个大汗淋漓 戴着红眼镜的圣诞怪杰 |
[07:15] | All right! I will take it if you stop talking. | 行了 如果能让你闭嘴 我就拿了吧 |
[07:20] | I think someone’s heart grew three sizes just now. | 我觉得某人的心刚刚涨大了三倍哦 |
[07:24] | But Judy, what’s the spending limit? | 不过茱迪 大约买什么价位的礼物 |
[07:26] | $50. | 50美金 |
[07:27] | Although, you do make four times as much as I do | 不过 你的工资是我的4倍 |
[07:29] | so whater that means to you. | 你自己体会下该怎么办吧 |
[07:33] | A little order in the court, please, alright? | 注意一下庭内秩序 好吗 |
[07:35] | Freshen up, settle down, | 打起精神 冷静下来 |
[07:37] | and can you toss me a couple of those juice boxes, please. | 能扔给我一盒果汁吗 |
[07:43] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[07:44] | Your honor, in the spirit of moving things along… | 法官大人 为了推动此案的实质性进展… |
[07:47] | Yes, counselor. | 是的 律师 |
[07:48] | Given the heat and the fact that the defense | 鉴于如此高的气温和被告已经 |
[07:49] | has already pled no contest, I’d really like to get | 提出不抗辩 我真的很想答应 |
[07:53] | to Mrs. Bullock’s petition for leniency. | 布洛克太太提出的宽大处理的请求 |
[07:56] | Unless, of course, the prosecution | 当然了 除非检方 |
[07:57] | wants to do a whole song and dance about maximum sentencing. | 闹着要求采取最高量刑 |
[08:00] | Oh, we do. | 正是如此 |
[08:01] | 100% we want to. | 我们百分百希望如此 |
[08:03] | Maximum jail time. | 最长牢狱时间 |
[08:04] | Community service. | 社区服务 |
[08:06] | Big fine. | 重重罚款 |
[08:07] | Dip into their college funds. | 剥夺他们上大学的费用 |
[08:08] | All right, counselor, please approach the bench. | 律师先生 请上前来 |
[08:13] | What? | 什么 |
[08:14] | College funds, Tom. | 存的大学学费啊 汤姆 |
[08:15] | You need to cool off. | 你得冷静一点 |
[08:16] | Will you please have a juice? | 你能先喝袋果汁吗 |
[08:18] | Not from my cooler! | 他没资格喝我的冷冻箱冰出来的果汁 |
[08:19] | Don’t need it. | 我不需要喝 |
[08:20] | No hot. | 我不热 |
[08:21] | Why can’t you just admit | 你为什么就是不愿承认 |
[08:22] | that youe affected by the heat like everybody else. | 你跟其他人一样 也被这高温影响了呢 |
[08:24] | I’m not affected by the heat. | 我才没有被这高温影响呢 |
[08:25] | They are. This jury is putty in my hands. | 他们才被影响了 整个陪审团都在我的鼓掌之中 |
[08:28] | Oh, Tom, there’s no jury, | 汤姆 根本没有陪审团 |
[08:30] | just a bunch of nubby chairs with mystery stains. | 只有几个凹凸不平的椅子和一些不知道什么污迹 |
[08:33] | Step away from that thermostat, son. | 离那个温度调节器远一点 孩子 |
[08:36] | Wayne Campbell. Local 617. | 我是韦恩·坎贝尔 本地工会人员 |
[08:38] | Let’s see here. | 让我来看看情况 |
[08:40] | Well, as much as I’d love to help you out, | 尽管我很想帮助你们 |
[08:42] | your touchpad’s good. | 但你们的触控板本身没问题 |
[08:43] | The trouble’s with your dial, which is technically a knob. | 问题在刻度盘上面 那基本上是个按钮开关 |
[08:45] | And that’s a whole different union altogether. | 那完全是另一个维修部门负责的了 |
[08:48] | Knobs and dials and things like that, | 按钮 刻度盘什么的 |
[08:50] | that’s Dante. | 要找丹迪 |
[08:51] | If you see him, when you see him, | 如果你看到他 等你见到他时 |
[08:53] | please tell him of our suffering. | 请你把我们的苦难转告给他 |
[08:55] | Yes, ma’am. | 遵命 老大 |
[09:00] | It’s hot, they say. | 大家都说很热 |
[09:02] | But I am not hot. | 但我可不觉得热 |
[09:06] | Come with me. Let’s imagine– | 请顺着我的思路 我们想象下… |
[09:07] | Objection, your honor. Relevance. | 我反对 法官大人 此言与本案无关 |
[09:08] | Sustained. | 反对有效 |
[09:10] | Tom, get to the D.A. ‘s recommendation, please. | 汤姆 请直接说地方检察官的建议吧 |
[09:12] | Let’s imagine ourselves in a depression-era | 我们想象下身处大萧条时期的 |
[09:14] | Mississippi courtroom. | 密西西比州法院内 |
[09:16] | I’d rather not. | 我可不想 |
[09:18] | Look, go down to the basement. | 听着 你去一趟地下室吧 |
[09:19] | See if you can find this Dante guy, | 看看能不能找到那个叫丹迪的家伙 |
[09:20] | I’rather not do that either. | 我也不想做那事 |
[09:23] | Oh, I see. Okay. | 我明白了 好吧 |
[09:25] | You’re bringing out the look. | 你已经显现出那种表情了 |
[09:27] | And this mother guy is a child misdangerer. | 而这位母亲家伙 是危害儿童分子 |
[09:31] | Endangerous. Misdangerment. | 非常危险 危害很大 |
[09:34] | Okay, he called me a mother guy. | 好吧 他称呼我是”母亲家伙” |
[09:35] | You got that right? | 你记下来了吧 |
[09:36] | I get everything. I don’t even try. | 我什么都记下来了 轻轻松松无压力 |
[09:38] | All right, the district turttorney needs a little tail time. | 好了 地方检察官需要一点”尾部时间” |
[09:40] | Oops, you lost me. | 哎呀 我听不懂了 |
[09:42] | And speaking in tongues, check. | 开始胡言乱语了 没错 |
[09:44] | Tom, if you can still hear me, don’t hit your head | 汤姆 如果你还能听到我说话 倒下去的时候 |
[09:45] | on the way down. | 可别磕到头 |
[09:48] | He’s down. | 他倒下了 |
[09:48] | Let’s recess. One hour lunch, please. | 休庭 给大家一小时午餐时间 |
[09:53] | Tedward, I can’t belie you’re afraid of the basement. | 泰沃德 我真不敢相信你竟然害怕地下室 |
[09:55] | You know what, judge, I am not afraid of basements, okay? | 法官大人 我可不怕地下室的好吗 |
[09:58] | I do not like basements ’cause they’re hotbeds for murder | 我不喜欢地下室 因为那里是谋杀案和神秘事件 |
[10:02] | and the occult, okay? | 常常发生的地方 好吗 |
[10:03] | And, look, let me tell you, it’s not fear. | 并且我告诉你 那并不是恐惧 |
[10:05] | That is knowledge, okay? | 那是知识 好吗 |
[10:07] | That’s kwledge– you know, how– afraid? | 那是知识 什么啊 怎么可能是害怕 |
[10:09] | That is a poor choice of words, your honor. | 真是用词极为不当 法官大人 |
[10:14] | Put that thing away, it’s a basement! | 把枪收起来 就是个地下室而已 |
[10:16] | Yeah, exactly! | 是啊 对极了 |
[10:20] | – It’s freezing in here! – Oh, a/c! | -下面真是冻死了 -是空调 |
[10:22] | Judge Jordan? | 乔丹法官 |
[10:28] | What the– | 搞什么啊 |
[10:34] | $100 buy-in. | 100块入局 |
[10:35] | Oh, we didn’t come to play. | 我们可不是来玩牌的 |
[10:37] | Okay. Okay. | 好吧 好吧 |
[10:38] | So let’s see, I see poker chips, cards, cash, booze, gambling. | 我看看 有筹码 牌 现金 酒 赌博 |
[10:43] | No, look, the only crime that I see is that a bunch of you | 不 但我眼中唯一的犯罪行为就是你们这群人 |
[10:47] | are wearing parkas in a basement | 竟然在地下室里穿着皮衣御寒 |
[10:49] | while it’s 110 degrees up in my courtroom! | 我的法庭里 温度却高达110华氏度 |
[10:52] | Parkas? | 皮衣 |
[10:53] | I got boob sweat. | 我的奶子都流汗了 |
[10:54] | We don’t wanna catch colds. | 我们可不想感冒 |
[10:55] | Are you trying to catch a hand to the back of the face? | 你们是想找死吗 |
[10:57] | Huh? Y’all do realize she’s a judge, right? | 是吗 你们都知道她是位法官吧 |
[11:01] | Oh, hey, what’s up, your honor? | 嘿 什么事儿 法官大人 |
[11:03] | Oh, “what’s up”? | “什么事儿” |
[11:04] | I’ll tell u what’s up, Barry White. | 我来告诉你什么事儿 大歌唱家 |
[11:05] | Which one of you’s Dante? | 你们哪位是丹迪啊 |
[11:07] | I’m looking for Dante the knob guy. | 我要找修空调按钮的丹迪 |
[11:09] | I’m Dante. | 我是丹迪 |
[11:09] | You need a knob. I already know. | 你们需要个按钮 我早知道了 |
[11:11] | Relax. | 淡定啦 |
[11:12] | You’re already on the list. | 我已经把你们排在待修名单上了 |
[11:13] | Oh, I’m on the list? Really? | 我在待修名单上 是吗 |
[11:15] | The–you know what’s not on your list? | 你知道你的名单上没有什么吗 |
[11:16] | Is that four-five off suit and the flop’s a jack-queen. | 就是那个45杂牌 翻牌是JQ |
[11:19] | I’m doing you a favor. | 我这是在帮你的忙 |
[11:20] | Tedward, show ’em how we do. | 泰沃德 让他们见识下我们的行事方式 |
[11:21] | All rise, Dante. All rise! | 起立 丹迪 全体起立 |
[11:23] | Get your velvety voice-ass up too. | 你的大屁股也赶紧抬起来吧 |
[11:25] | All rise. | 全体起来 |
[11:27] | Court is now in session, the honorable Rebecca Wright, | 现在复庭 尊敬的丽贝卡·莱特 |
[11:30] | judge presiding. | 本庭法官 |
[11:31] | Please be seated and come to order. | 请坐下 并保持肃静 |
[11:39] | Ladies and gentlemen, the lovely and talented, Dante. | 女士们先生们 感谢可爱又有才的丹迪 |
[11:45] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[11:46] | No last name, apparently. | 显然是有名无姓 |
[11:50] | Counselor, your client. | 律师 委托人 |
[11:52] | Before you sentence me, can I just say– | 在你给我判罪之前 能不能让我… |
[11:54] | Uh, can I just s something? | 能不能让我说几句话 |
[11:57] | I’m a mother, you are a mother– | 我是位母亲 你也是位母亲 |
[11:59] | No, she’s not. Not a mom. | 不 她不是 她没当妈 |
[12:00] | Thank you, Tom. | 谢谢你 汤姆 |
[12:01] | Welcome. | 不客气 |
[12:03] | It’s a well-known fact. | 那是众所周知的事实 |
[12:04] | People say it all the time. | 人们经常这么说的 |
[12:05] | Especially Oprah. | 尤其是奥普拉 |
[12:07] | You know, back in when she was “Oprah” Oprah. | 不过是当她依然是当年那个奥普拉的时候 |
[12:09] | Being a mother is the hardest job on earth. | 做母亲是这个星球上最艰难的工作了 |
[12:12] | Well, I would tell all those different versions of oprah, | 我会告诉其他那些不同版本的奥普拉 |
[12:16] | and anybody else, that they should watch | 和别的任何人 他们应该去看看 |
[12:18] | world’s deadliest catch ‘caue that’s actually the hardest job. | 《致命捕捞》这个节目 因为那才是最艰难的工作 |
[12:21] | Since you’re not a mom, | 你又不是一位母亲 |
[12:21] | you’re n exactly qualified to say, are you? | 你没资格说这种话吧 不是吗 |
[12:23] | Well, I’m not an Alaskan crab fisherman, | 我也不是阿拉斯加州的捕蟹工 |
[12:25] | and it looks very dangerous and very exhausting from my couch. | 但我觉得那工作非常危险 也很累人 |
[12:29] | Well that’s because that’s how they edit it. | 那完全是因为他们剪辑出来的画面效果 |
[12:31] | And that’s what people do to me. | 人们也对我的视频进行了恶意剪辑 |
[12:32] | They make me out ot be this crazy-ass face-mask mom, | 他们把我塑造成了疯狂的”面罩母亲” |
[12:35] | but I am a good mother, okay? | 但我是个好母亲 好吗 |
[12:37] | Objection, irrelevant. | 反对 与本案无关 |
[12:38] | We’re not here to determine the quality | 我们可不是来讨论”面罩母亲” |
[12:40] | of face-mask mom’s mothering. | 为人母的资格的 |
[12:42] | Stop calling me that! | 别再那样称呼我了 |
[12:43] | Sustained. | 反对有效 |
[12:44] | Tom, there a puddle forming under your chair. | 汤姆 你的椅子下面都快有个小水坑了 |
[12:46] | Just be aware. | 当心点哦 |
[12:47] | And the prosecution is correct. | 检方的看法是正确的 |
[12:50] | We are here because Regina Bullock | 我们之所以在此 就是因为瑞吉娜·布洛克 |
[12:52] | willfully chased and tackled a child. | 蓄意追赶并绊倒了一个孩子 |
[12:54] | However, it is the court’s opinion | 但是 本庭认为她无意 |
[12:55] | that she did not intend great bodily harm or death. | 对那个孩子造成重大身体伤害或死亡 |
[12:59] | Therefore, there will be no jail time served. | 因此 她不需要坐牢 |
[13:02] | Mrs. Bullock, will you please stand for sentencing? | 布洛克太太 你能站起来听候宣判吗 |
[13:06] | I’m sensing a lot of hostility here. | 我感受到你很强的敌意啊 |
[13:08] | Wh–what? Counselor? | 什么情况 律师 |
[13:11] | No one’s gonna question me, I will question myself. | 没人可以对我发问 我会自问自答的 |
[13:13] | Bible please? | 拿《圣经》过来 |
[13:14] | Mrs. Bullock, that’s not necessary. | 布洛克太太 没这个必要啊 |
[13:16] | Okay, well, it’s happening. | 好吧 但我就要这样做 |
[13:19] | Whole truth, nothing but the truth, | 只说真话 绝无虚言 |
[13:20] | bible, bible, bible– that’s all I know. | 《圣经》 《圣经》 我只知道这几句誓言 |
[13:22] | Okay, that little boy over there, | 好了 那边那个小男孩 |
[13:24] | that is my son. | 是我儿子 |
[13:25] | Someone grabbed him by the face-mask and swung him. | 有人抓住他的面罩 挥了他一下 |
[13:29] | Okay? Like a big fat purse. | 好吗 用一个很大的包砸过去 |
[13:31] | Where is the youtube of that? | 请问那个场面的视频在哪儿 |
[13:32] | I will ask you. | 我倒是想问问你 |
[13:34] | I’d–I’d tackle that kid all over again. | 我愿意再次绊倒那个孩子 |
[13:35] | And only I’d do it higher and harder. | 只不过这次我会踢得更狠 |
[13:37] | Probably somewhere near the kidneys, you know? | 或许照着他的肾脏附近踢 |
[13:39] | Really give it to him. | 让他尝尝厉害 |
[13:40] | Mrs. Bullock, please meet me in chambers. | 布洛克太太 请跟我到内庭去 |
[13:42] | Objection! | 反对 |
[13:44] | Girl talk. | 女性私聊啊 |
[13:45] | You cannot say that you would willingly harm a child. | 你不能说你将会刻意伤害一个孩子 |
[13:49] | It makes it very difficult for me to go easy on you. | 那让我很难对你宽大处理了 |
[13:52] | This office is a mess. You live like a goat. | 这办公室一团糟 你搞得跟狗窝一样 |
[13:54] | Look, I can put jail back on the table. | 听着 我还是可以继续让你坐牢的 |
[13:56] | Don’t cross your arms at me. | 别对我环抱双臂以示抗议 |
[13:58] | Fine. | 好吧 |
[14:00] | Okay, now you look like an angry cartoon character. | 现在你看上去像个怒气冲冲的卡通角色 |
[14:03] | Seriously, you should have steam and smoke | 说真的 现在你的耳朵该气得 |
[14:05] | coming out of your ears. | 冒蒸汽和烟雾才够形象 |
[14:06] | Sit down. | 坐下 |
[14:07] | What happened to you? | 你是遭遇了什么事啊 |
[14:08] | I mean, why are you so tightly wound? | 你为什么像吃了火药一样 |
[14:13] | Your honor, my entire life is devoted to my children. | 法官大人 我的整个人生都献给我的孩子们了 |
[14:16] | It’s why I get up every morning. | 那是每天清晨叫醒我的原动力 |
[14:18] | And three months ago, my husband walked out on us | 三个月前 我丈夫抛下了我们 |
[14:21] | for the girl at the genius bar. | 跟苹果天才吧的一个女孩跑了 |
[14:22] | Fixed your ipad, broke your home. | 她把你的iPad修好了 然后拆散了你的家 |
[14:25] | I’m sorry, please continue. | 我很抱歉 请你继续说 |
[14:28] | So a bomb has gone off in there lives | 他们的生活中就像有一颗大炸弹爆炸了 |
[14:30] | and there is literally not one thing I can do about it | 但我却对此完全无能为力 |
[14:33] | so, yes, maybe I try to protect them | 所以没错 我会试图保护他们 |
[14:35] | from everything else. | 不受其他任何事的伤害 |
[14:36] | I see. | 我明白了 |
[14:38] | And look, I saw that video, | 听着 我看了那段视频 |
[14:40] | that little douchebag did have it ming. | 那个小兔崽子的确是自找的 |
[14:42] | But still, he’s a child. | 不过不管怎样 他是个孩子 |
[14:43] | Well, you just called him a douchebag. | 你刚刚明明骂他是小兔崽子啊 |
[14:45] | Yes, but I’m not on trial here. | 没错 但受审的人可不是我 |
[14:49] | You know, Tomorrow is the first Christmas | 明天将是我有史以来第一次无法 |
[14:50] | that I won’t be with my kids. | 陪伴孩子们度过的圣诞节了 |
[14:54] | They’ll be spending it with their dad and the stupid genius. | 他们只能跟他们的老爸和那位愚蠢的天才一起过了 |
[14:58] | She’s not even a good one, you know? | 她的维修技术其实根本不行 |
[15:00] | She had to ask the supervisor for help. | 她还得找她的上级帮忙呢 |
[15:01] | That’s tough. | 那真让人难受 |
[15:03] | But look, look. | 但你仔细想想 |
[15:04] | Maybe this is an opportunity for you | 或许这是个大好机会 |
[15:06] | to do something fun for yourself. | 可以让你为自己找点乐子 |
[15:08] | I mean, when’s the last time you really let your hair down and had fun? | 你上一次真正放松下来 尽情享受是什么时候啊 |
[15:14] | I don’t know. | 我也不知道 |
[15:16] | Oh, three days ago I renewed my subscription to cooking light. | 对了 3天前我续订了《厨艺之光》杂志 |
[15:20] | I paid full price. | 我全额付款的哦 |
[15:23] | Still riding that high, huh? | 依然没办法放松是吧 |
[15:26] | Mrs. Bullock, I may never fully relate | 布洛克太太 我或许永远无法理解 |
[15:29] | to what drove you to tackle that boy. | 是什么驱使你绊倒了那个男孩 |
[15:31] | When it comes to a mother’s instinct to protect her children, | 但是说到母亲保护孩子的本能 |
[15:34] | I’m certainly no genius. | 我在这方面可不是天才 |
[15:35] | Genius? Really? | 天才 你非要提这个词吗 |
[15:37] | Poor choice of words. All right? | 算我用词不慎 行吗 |
[15:38] | I hereby sentence you to six months counseling. | 我在此宣判你接受6个月的心理辅导 |
[15:42] | The first card, you will find Dr. Gary Boyd. | 第一张名片 你可以联系加里·博伊德医生 |
[15:45] | He specializes in divorce and family counseling. | 他的专业就是离婚和家庭事务方面的心理咨询 |
[15:47] | The next card, there’s an address written on the back. | 第二张名片 背面写着个地址 |
[15:49] | You’re to report there tomorrow morning. 10 A.M. sharp. | 你必须明早10点准时去那里报到 |
[15:52] | Wait, Tomorrow morning is Christmas. | 等等 明天是圣诞节啊 |
[15:54] | Well, I happen to know that you have nother plans. | 我恰好知道你没有其他安排 |
[15:57] | So ho-ho-ho! | 所以 就这样 |
[16:00] | ‘Cause I know you | 因为我了解你这人 |
[16:01] | and I’m pretty sure that you forgot about secret Santa– | 我敢肯定你一定忘了秘密圣诞老人的事 |
[16:04] | Oh, my god! You’re right. | 天啊 你说得对 |
[16:06] | Yeah, uh, just a reminder, that, uh, stores close early. | 是啊 我提醒你一下 今天商店会提早关门 |
[16:10] | Especially if you’re shopping for someone | 尤其是如果那个人想要的 |
[16:11] | who might want gucci loafers in a men’s size 11. | 是一双古驰拖鞋 尺码是男性11码 |
[16:15] | Just saying. An 11. | 我就说说而已 11码的哦 |
[16:17] | Mall race, sherman oaks galleria. | 赶快去商场吧 雪曼奥克斯加莱利商场 |
[16:19] | Ask for Paul. | 去找一个叫保罗的 |
[16:20] | You get that? | 你听明白了吗 |
[16:39] | Merry friggin Christmas! | 圣诞快乐哟 |
[16:41] | Oh, god. Why have you lured me to your home? | 天啊 你为什么把我骗到你家啊 |
[16:45] | This feels like the beginning of a dateline story. | 这让人感觉像是劲爆事件的开端 |
[16:47] | Well, I’m probably not gonna murder you. | 我应该不会谋害你的 |
[16:49] | But every year on Christmas, I do something fun and new, | 但是每年圣诞节 我都会做些好玩又新颖的事 |
[16:52] | and this year, you are doing it with me. | 今年呢 你要陪我一起做 |
[16:55] | – All right? – Oh, okay. | -好吗 -好吧 |
[16:57] | That actually sounds worse than being murdered. | 那听上去比被谋害更加糟糕 |
[17:07] | So this is your big present to yourself? | 这就是你送给自己的盛大礼物吗 |
[17:10] | You’ve never been to the beach before? | 你从未来过海滩吗 |
[17:12] | Here, drink that. | 给 喝了这个 |
[17:13] | Oh, no, thank you. | 不用了 谢谢 |
[17:14] | It’s not optional. | 你没有选择权 |
[17:16] | This is a court-ordered shot. | 这是法庭强制要求你喝的 |
[17:19] | Merry Christmas, Regina. Bottoms up. | 圣诞快乐 瑞吉娜 干杯哦 |
[17:21] | Merry Christmas. | 圣诞快乐 |
[17:25] | Okay, all right. | 好了 行了 |
[17:27] | So there I did your shot of tequila on the beach on Christmas day. | 我在圣诞节这天 按你的要求在海滩上喝了龙舌兰 |
[17:31] | I feel like a new woman. | 我感觉像是个全新的女人了 |
[17:32] | So can I go home now? | 我现在可以回家了吗 |
[17:33] | No, no, no. We’re not going home. | 不 不行 我们可不能回家 |
[17:35] | We’re going in. | 我们要跳进去 |
[17:36] | I’m sorry, in the water? | 不好意思 是要进入水里吗 |
[17:37] | – Yeah. – No, sir. | -是啊 -不行 大人 |
[17:38] | It’s December, it’s gonna be freezing. | 现在是12月 海水一定冰冷刺骨 |
[17:40] | No, no, that’s what the tequila was for. | 不 不 喝了龙舌兰酒就不会觉得冷了 |
[17:41] | Warms us up. | 让我们暖暖身子 |
[17:42] | Oh, no. Well, I don’t have a bathing suit. | 不行 我可没带泳衣 |
[17:43] | So there’s that. | 问题来了 |
[17:44] | It doesn’t matter. | 那没关系 |
[17:46] | It’s a nude beach. | 这里是天体海滩 |
[17:48] | Oh, no. Under no circumstances– | 不要 我是绝对不会… |
[17:50] | No, are you crazy? | 不行 你是疯了吗 |
[17:51] | We, desperate times call for desperate measures, okay? | 绝望时刻就要铤而走险 不是吗 |
[17:56] | The state of California is ordering you | 加州政府命令你 |
[17:59] | to take your clothes off, all right? | 脱掉衣服 好吗 |
[18:00] | So strip. | 快脱光吧 |
[18:01] | You’re asking me to drink alcohol and strip publicly? | 你是在叫我喝酒又当众脱光吗 |
[18:04] | That’s right. | 没错 |
[18:05] | If you were a fraternity, | 如果你是个兄弟会成员 |
[18:06] | they would take away your charter for hazing. | 他们肯定早就吊销了你的执照 |
[18:08] | If I were a fraternity, I would have burned it | 如果我是兄弟会成员 肯定老早就 |
[18:10] | to the ground a long time ago. | 一把火把它烧光了 |
[18:15] | Ready? | 准备好了吗 |
[18:16] | Not at all, no. | 没有 完全没有 |
[18:18] | One…Two…Three! | 一 二 三 |
[18:35] | We’re doing it! | 我们真的在玩呢 |
[18:37] | Oh, my god! It’s freezing! | 天啊 好冷啊 |
[18:40] | Oh, my god. I haven’t done anything like this in ages. | 天啊 我已经好多年没做过这么刺激的事了 |
[18:44] | And I love it! It’s amazing! | 我好爱啊 实在太赞了 |
[18:49] | And our bosoms just touched. | 我们的奶子刚刚碰到一起了 |
[19:04] | I feel like I just witnessed a water birth. | 我感觉我刚刚目睹了水中分娩的情形 |
[19:08] | That feels better. | 感觉好多了 |
[19:10] | Good! | 真爽 |
[19:16] | This isn’t a nude beach, is it? | 这并不是天体海滩 对吧 |
[19:19] | No. It’s not. | 不 不是的 |
[19:25] | Merry Christmas. | 圣诞快乐 |
[19:27] | Oh, relax. No one’s been shot. | 淡定啦 又没人中枪 |
[19:28] | Just a couple of naked ladies. | 不过是两个裸女而已 |
[19:36] | Thank you, Rebecca. | 谢谢你 丽贝卡 |
[19:38] | You know, I didn’t think about my kids once? | 话说 我刚刚一次都没想着我的孩子们 |
[19:40] | Really? | 真的吗 |
[19:41] | No, I thout about them the entire day. | 假的 我一整天都在想着他们 |
[19:44] | Except for that 20 minutes where I couldn’t feel half my body. | 除了我的身体有一半失去知觉的那20分钟 |
[19:46] | I should thank you for coming along. | 我该感谢你过来才对 |
[19:48] | I have officially skinny dipped in all five of the oceans. | 我这下算是正式在五大洋中都裸泳过了 |
[19:52] | And the moat at the mini golf castle. | 以及迷你高尔夫城堡的那条河里 |
[19:56] | I think we might have traumatized that family. | 我觉得我们或许给那家人留下心理阴影了 |
[19:59] | I don’t– no, I actually think | 我并不…我其实觉得 |
[20:01] | bought the mermaid story. | 他们相信我们是美人鱼了 |
[20:10] | From judge Hernandez? | 赫尔南德斯法官送的啊 |
[20:13] | Hey, judge. | 你好 法官大人 |
[20:14] | What are you doing here? | 你到这里来干什么 |
[20:15] | I got Judy for my secret Santa. | 我作为秘密圣诞老人的送礼对象是茱迪 |
[20:16] | What are you doing here? | 你又到这里来干什么 |
[20:17] | I got Judy, too. | 我也是要送给茱迪 |
[20:19] | That’s weird. Really? | 那倒是很怪 真的吗 |
[20:21] | That is weird. | 的确很古怪 |
[20:25] | Wait, what are you guys doing here? | 等等 你们在这里干什么啊 |
[20:27] | Oh, is this like a party? | 是要开派对吗 |
[20:28] | ‘Cause I can not stay for more than like, an hour. | 因为我无法在这里待 一小时以上 |
[20:32] | No, we both got Judy for secret Santa. | 不是吧 我们都要送礼给茱迪啊 |
[20:34] | No, wait–I– you got ju– | 不 等等 你也是… |
[20:35] | I got Judy! | 我也是送给茱迪 |
[20:36] | – Wait a minute. – What? | -等等 -什么 |
[20:37] | We all got Judy a present? | 我们都给茱迪买了礼物吗 |
[20:39] | You know, they say it’s better to give than receive on Christmas. | 人们都说圣诞节赠礼比收礼好 |
[20:42] | But I say that is a bunch of malarkey. | 但我觉得 那简直是狗屁胡言 |
[20:45] | So hand them over. | 把礼物都交过来吧 |
[20:47] | I gotta give you credit. | 我不得不佩服你 |
[20:48] | – Thank you. – Judy! | -谢谢 -茱迪 |
[20:49] | Just be careful with this. | 小心点这个礼物 |
[20:51] | Tippy spent like, an hour on that. | 蒂皮花了一小时 才做成的呢 |
[20:55] | Mom, Jasmine, Ezekiel, | 老妈 加丝敏 伊兹卡尔 |
[20:58] | Santa dropped off more presents! | 圣诞老人又送了更多的礼物来啦 |
[21:03] | It’s a bold move but I gotta say, I like her style. | 真是大胆的行为 但我不得不说我喜欢她的风格 |
[21:06] | Is Ezekiel her cat? | 伊兹卡尔是她的猫名吗 |
[21:08] | Maybe they are all her cats. | 或许她刚刚叫的都是猫名 |
[21:10] | Even mom. | “老妈”也是猫名 |