时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
---|---|---|
[00:04] | Ah, cold! | 好冷 |
[00:09] | Michelle? | 米歇尔 |
[00:13] | Michelle–oh. | 米歇尔 |
[00:15] | Oh, please don’t be dead. | 拜托别死啊 |
[00:18] | Please don’t be dead. | 拜托别死啊 |
[00:19] | Michelle? | 米歇尔 |
[00:20] | Man, I am never drinking again. | 老天 我再也不喝酒了 |
[00:22] | Come on. Here. | 来吧 给 |
[00:24] | – Okay. – Come on. | -好的 -来吧 |
[00:25] | You were married to that douche bag for 17 years. | 你嫁给那个人渣17年 |
[00:28] | I can’t believe I was married to a guy that has | 我不敢相信我嫁的那个男人 |
[00:31] | a Calvin and Hobbes tramp stamp. | 居然在屁缝上纹了卡尔文与霍布斯[卡通人物] |
[00:34] | This is fun! | 这样真开心 |
[00:35] | – I had a lot of fun. – Lot of fun last night. | -我很开心 -昨晚真开心 |
[00:38] | – So crazy! – It’s like old times. | -太疯狂了 -就像以前一样 |
[00:39] | It is like old times. | 就像以前一样 |
[00:40] | I mean, we were just so, like– | 我们就像 |
[00:42] | We didn’t have a care in the world. | 这世上一点烦恼也没有 |
[00:43] | – No, we didn’t. – We were like– | -是没有 -我们就像… |
[00:45] | I’m proud of you. | 我为你骄傲 |
[00:47] | – You are? – Yeah. | -是吗 -是的 |
[00:48] | And you have to trust me. | 你必须相信我 |
[00:50] | It may not feel like it right this second… | 现在可能感觉不对 |
[00:52] | – Right. – But all of this… | -是 -但这一切 |
[00:54] | Is good for you. | 对你有好处 |
[00:56] | You needed a palate cleanser. | 你需要用性忘情[也指去口腔异味] |
[00:57] | I did. | 没错 |
[00:59] | And so do I. | 我也需要 |
[01:01] | Your breath is kind of disgusting. | 你的口气真恶心 |
[01:02] | I know. | 我知道 |
[01:04] | It’s hideous. | 真恶心 |
[01:31] | Case number 62-217-46a, | 案件号62-217-46a |
[01:34] | state versus li lin for loitering. | 州诉林利流浪罪 |
[01:37] | Wow, try saying that three times. | 说个三遍试试[英文发音拗口] |
[01:39] | Uh, loitering does not usually make it to my bench. | 我的法庭通常不审理流浪罪 |
[01:42] | So why don’t you tell me– | 你不如告诉我 |
[01:43] | What’s so special about this guy? | 这家伙有什么特别的 |
[01:45] | Mr. Lin has been | 林先生 |
[01:47] | repeatedly asked to leave the sidewalk | 被反复要求离开 |
[01:49] | in front of the saladictatorship vegan restaurant. | “沙拉独裁”素食餐馆门前的人行道 |
[01:52] | Apparently, when people try to give him money, | 显然 别人想给他钱时 |
[01:55] | he tries to steal their shoes. | 他想偷他们的鞋子 |
[01:57] | Well, then, if he’s stealing shoes, | 如果他偷鞋子 |
[01:58] | why isn’t he here for theft, Tom? | 为什么不起诉他盗窃罪 汤姆 |
[01:59] | Apparently, he’s never gotten a pair. | 显然 他没偷到一双 |
[02:01] | Well, then you two have something in common. | 那你们两个有共同点了[讽刺汤姆没男子气概] |
[02:05] | Uh, Mr. Lin? | 林先生 |
[02:06] | Do you understand the charges brought before you? | 你明白被起诉的罪名吗 |
[02:11] | Mr. Lin? | 林先生 |
[02:12] | Counselor? | 律师 |
[02:13] | Lin–lin, here it is. | 林 林 在这里 |
[02:17] | Uh, loitering, steals shoes– oh! | 流浪 偷鞋子 |
[02:20] | He’s deaf, your honor. | 他耳聋 法官阁下 |
[02:21] | Well, that would have been | 这真是一个 |
[02:23] | good information to have. | 好消息 |
[02:25] | I’m gonna continue the case until we find someone | 找到懂手语的人后 再继续 |
[02:27] | who knows sign language. | 审理此案 |
[02:29] | And can someone make a saladictatorship run? | 能有人去一趟”沙拉独裁”素食餐馆吗 |
[02:31] | An avocado oppression would be great right now. | 打包份鳄梨就太好了 |
[02:36] | So you and Michelle went out again last night? | 你和米歇尔昨晚又出去了 |
[02:39] | I’m basically cruise-directing her divorce, | 我算是一手策划了她的离婚 |
[02:41] | and that girl can rage. | 那妹子真能发疯 |
[02:43] | She’s like the Courtney Love of Woodland hills. | 她就像是伍德兰德岗的科特妮·洛芙 |
[02:45] | I’m supposed to be signing up Judges | 我本来要安排法官们 |
[02:47] | for their new portrait photographs, | 拍新的肖像照 |
[02:48] | but seeing as how you look like a troll doll, | 但你的样子这么像巨魔娃娃 |
[02:51] | I’m gonna postpone you to Monday. | 我就帮你推到周一吧 |
[02:53] | Yeah, it’s probably a good idea. | 这样敢情好 |
[02:54] | What is that? Is that queso? | 这是什么 是奶酪吗 |
[02:56] | Yeah, if I had to guess. | 要我猜的话是的 |
[02:58] | Oh, man. | 老天 |
[02:59] | I fell over the nacho machine again. | 我又摔在玉米片机上了 |
[03:01] | You better rally tonight, Rebecca, | 你今晚最好精神起来 丽贝卡 |
[03:02] | ‘Cause I told my buddy I was bringing people, okay? | 我跟哥们说了 我会带人去 |
[03:05] | For sure. | 没问题 |
[03:06] | The last thing I want to do is | 我最不想的就是 |
[03:07] | let dj Dr. Giggles down. | 让DJ傻笑博士失望 |
[03:09] | Riddles. Okay? | 是谜语 |
[03:11] | Dj Dr. Riddles. | DJ谜语博士 |
[03:12] | Giggles won’t be a stupid name for a dj. | 哪有DJ叫傻笑这种蠢名字的 |
[03:14] | That would be stupid. | 太蠢了 |
[03:16] | You know you’re wearing two different shoes, right? | 你知道你穿的鞋子不是一对吧 |
[03:21] | Judge Hernandez, | 赫尔南德斯法官 |
[03:22] | I don’t know if you heard, but I am in charge | 我不知道你是否听说了 但我负责 |
[03:24] | of the new judge photos for the courthouse. | 安排法院的法官们拍新的照片 |
[03:26] | And I see that you have not signed up yet, | 我看到你没报名 |
[03:28] | so if I can just get a time for you… | 我帮你安排下吧 |
[03:29] | Don’t need a new photo. | 不需要新照片 |
[03:31] | My official picture’s been the same since I got here. | 我来以后 官方照片就没变过 |
[03:33] | I don’t see any reason to change now. | 现在也没原因要换 |
[03:35] | Really? | 真的吗 |
[03:36] | This one? | 这张 |
[03:37] | A) it’s 30 years old. | 第一 这张有30年历史了 |
[03:39] | B) you look like Gloria Estefan with a mustache. | 第二 你看起来像长着胡子的葛洛丽雅·伊斯特芬 |
[03:42] | Look, do me a favor. | 算是帮我吧 |
[03:43] | Let me bring you into this decade with a new photo. | 让我用新照片带你进入新的十年吧 |
[03:45] | Fine, I suppose I can take a new one. | 好吧 我可以拍张新的 |
[03:48] | Although I will miss the old one. | 不过我会想念这张旧照片的 |
[03:50] | Look at that beautiful, thick hair. | 看这美丽浓密的头发 |
[04:09] | This place is fun. | 这地方真好玩 |
[04:10] | Good music and cute guys. | 音乐不错帅哥多 |
[04:13] | Yeah, and we look hot! | 对 而且我们好性感 |
[04:16] | Come on, let’s go find somebody you’re gonna regret in the morning. | 来吧 去找个令你早上后悔的人 |
[04:20] | Okay. | 好的 |
[04:20] | Yeah, I wanna get back at Nick, you know? | 我要报复尼克 |
[04:22] | Because he keeps posting photos on instagram | 他不停地在”照片分享”上发一些 |
[04:24] | with all these random skanks. | 和放荡女人的合影 |
[04:26] | Check this out. | 看这个 |
[04:27] | Look at it, look at it. | 你看 |
[04:28] | Who wears a bikini top to outback steakhouse? | 谁会穿着比基尼上装去澳美客牛排馆 |
[04:32] | Well, clearly she’s not afraid of the sizzling fajita platter. | 显然她不怕热得滋滋响的烤肉盘 |
[04:35] | God. | 老天 |
[04:37] | I am never getting in a relationship again. | 我再也不谈恋爱了 |
[04:39] | See, this is why I don’t do relationships. | 所以我不谈恋爱 |
[04:41] | The jealousy, the games– | 嫉妒 游戏 |
[04:42] | You know who mates for life? | 你知道什么会是一辈子的伴侣吗 |
[04:44] | Yeah, the albatross. | 信天翁[有苦恼的意思] |
[04:46] | It’s the literary symbol for dragging you down. | 连文字都暗示着这辈子没希望 |
[04:49] | Wow. Wait, so you don’t have any of that with Gary? | 慢着 那么你和加里一点都不是认真的吗 |
[04:52] | No, because Gary and I are not in a relationship. | 加里和我没谈恋爱 |
[04:55] | We’re just like for fun and for free, right? | 我们只是开心 自由自在 |
[04:57] | No fuss, no muss– | 没有大惊小怪 |
[04:58] | We’re basically like two dudes who hang out, you know? | 我们就像两个爷们混在一起 |
[05:01] | Only one of us isn’t a dude. | 只是其中一个不是爷们 |
[05:02] | Hey, what’s up, judge? | 还好吗 法官 |
[05:04] | Hey, Michelle. | 米歇尔 |
[05:05] | Looking good since your newfound freedom. | 单身以后看起来不错嘛 |
[05:06] | – Thank you! – Congrats! | -谢谢 -恭喜你 |
[05:08] | Can I tell you something, Tedward? | 我可以告诉你一件事吗 泰沃德 |
[05:09] | – Yeah. – Now that I’m single, | -好 -现在我单身了 |
[05:10] | I’m kinda looking at you differently. | 我看你有些不同了 |
[05:12] | You’ve always looked at me like that. | 你一直这样看我的 |
[05:14] | Have I really? | 真的吗 |
[05:14] | How about– | 不如 |
[05:16] | How about nobody looks at anybody differently, huh? | 不如没人看谁不同了 |
[05:18] | What? | 什么 |
[05:19] | Oh, oh, wait! | 等等 |
[05:21] | Will you pose with me like I’m a random skank? | 当我是放荡女人和我拍照好吗 |
[05:24] | – Yeah. – Okay. Uh– | -好的 -来吧 |
[05:25] | Wait, is this a jealousy photo? | 这是嫉妒照片吗 |
[05:27] | Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, it is. | 是的 |
[05:28] | Okay, well– | 好的 |
[05:30] | Sweet! Thanks! | 太好了 谢谢 |
[05:35] | Hey, is that Gary? | 那是加里吗 |
[05:40] | Tedward, did you invite Gary? | 泰沃德 你邀请了加里吗 |
[05:41] | Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I didn’t tell you? | 是的 我没告诉你吗 |
[05:44] | What’s he doing, the grind or the freak? | 他在做什么 研磨式还是变态式 |
[05:48] | That’s Gary? | 那是加里吗 |
[05:49] | He is cute. | 他好帅 |
[05:51] | Yeah. | 是的 |
[05:54] | He’s cute. | 他很帅 |
[05:58] | – Gary. – Rebecca, you just get here? | -加里 -丽贝卡 你刚来吗 |
[06:00] | I did. I did. I did. This is my friend, Michelle. | 是的 这是我朋友米歇尔 |
[06:03] | Hey. How you doing? | 你好吗 |
[06:04] | This is, um– | 这位是 |
[06:05] | Renata. | 瑞娜特 |
[06:06] | Oh, Renata. Is that like a boat? | 瑞娜特 是船的名字吗 |
[06:08] | What? | 什么 |
[06:09] | Yeah, so hey, you guys, um, | 你们两个 |
[06:11] | just meet right now? | 是刚认识的吗 |
[06:12] | Are you old friends or relatives? This a cousin? | 老朋友还是亲戚 表妹吗 |
[06:15] | – No, we met earlier tonight. – Ah, okay. | -我们今晚早些时候认识的 -好的 |
[06:17] | That’s cool, that’s cool, that’s cool. | 挺好的 挺好的 |
[06:18] | What, what? | 什么 什么 |
[06:19] | Oh, Gary, you are hilarious. | 加里 你太搞笑了 |
[06:21] | We have a bunch of inside jokes. | 我们有好多两人才懂的笑话 |
[06:26] | Well, he and I were kind of dancing, so– | 他和我在跳舞呢 |
[06:28] | All right, we’re all dancing. | 好的 我们都在跳舞 |
[06:29] | Yeah. | 是的 |
[06:31] | Hey, could I just borrow him for one second? | 我借他一下好吗 |
[06:33] | One mississippi, time’s up. | 一下了 时间到 |
[06:35] | Time’s up. | 时间到 |
[06:39] | Whoo! Gosh. | 老天 |
[06:41] | Oh. So where you from? | 你哪里人 |
[06:43] | Uh, here. | 这里 |
[06:54] | Morning, judge Wright. | 早上好 莱特法官 |
[06:55] | I don’t know about you, but I cannot | 不知道你怎样 但我 |
[06:56] | stop thinking about last night. | 总是想起昨晚 |
[06:58] | Yeah, that was fun. | 对 真开心 |
[06:59] | Hey, how’s your tailbone? | 你的尾脊骨怎么样了 |
[07:00] | Bruised but worth it. | 青了 但值了 |
[07:02] | Yeah, it was! | 的确 |
[07:03] | That was fun. | 真是开心 |
[07:04] | Hey, do you want to join me tonight | 你今晚想和我一起 |
[07:06] | for an all-expenses-paid evening of fun and frolic | 去克瑞斯威克酒店享受已经全额付费的 |
[07:08] | at the crestwick hotel? | 开心欢乐吗 |
[07:10] | Free fun and frolic? | 免费的开心欢乐 |
[07:12] | How’d you swing that? | 你怎么得手的 |
[07:13] | Ah, this couple I do marriage counseling for | 找我做婚姻辅导的夫妻 |
[07:14] | gave it to me–or used to do marriage counseling for. | 给我的 以前是婚姻辅导 |
[07:16] | Now I just do divorce counseling for the wife. | 现在我为妻子做离婚辅导 |
[07:18] | But, hey, winner, winner, chicken dinner. | 但是 不要白不要 |
[07:21] | Ooh, well, if it’s free, it’s for me. | 如果不要钱我就去 |
[07:24] | Gosh, I do love a good hotel room. | 老天 我好喜欢高级酒店房间 |
[07:26] | Use all the towels you want, | 想用多少毛巾都行 |
[07:27] | dump them on the floor, | 扔在地板上 |
[07:28] | and eat bacon from room service | 叫房间服务送培根 |
[07:30] | while someone else cleans it up. | 其他人来打扫 |
[07:32] | – It’s the best. – I’m in! | -最爽了 -我去 |
[07:33] | Nice! | 太棒了 |
[07:36] | Judge Wright, this is our interpreter. | 莱特法官 这是我们的翻译 |
[07:38] | Right. | 好的 |
[07:39] | Mr. Lin, | 林先生 |
[07:40] | you have been charged with loitering, | 你被起诉流浪罪 |
[07:42] | punishable by a fine | 可处于罚款 |
[07:44] | and jail time of up to one year. | 以及最长一年监禁 |
[07:46] | Do you understand the charges against you? | 你明白被起诉罪名吗 |
[07:49] | He doesn’t understand me. | 他不懂我的手语 |
[07:50] | I think he speaks mandarin. | 我想他说的是普通话 |
[07:52] | Isn’t all sign language the same? | 难道手语不是一样的吗 |
[07:53] | Racist. | 种族歧视 |
[07:54] | Nope. You’re going to have to find someone who knows csl– | 不同 你得找到懂CSL的人 |
[07:57] | Chinese sign language. | 中国手语 |
[07:58] | Ugh, okay. Okay, another continuance. | 好吧 再次延期 |
[08:01] | Get me someone who can sign csl, | 找个懂CSL的人 |
[08:03] | someone who can speak mandarin, | 会说普通话的人 |
[08:05] | and a lawyer who can speak both english and mandarin, | 会说英语和普通话的律师 |
[08:06] | so we don’t get tripped up on legal terms. | 这样在法律术语上不会有分歧 |
[08:09] | And, you come back, just in case. | 以防万一 你要再来 |
[08:11] | And we need a stenographer who can take transcript in mandarin. | 我们需要一位会用普通话记录的速记员 |
[08:15] | That’s “I got you covered, Judge” in mandarin. | 这是普通话的”我能行 法官” |
[08:18] | Okay, Judy, how do you know mandarin? | 茱迪 你怎么会说普通话的 |
[08:19] | Oh, well, the cable guy hooked us up with free cable | 我小时候 装有线的给我家 |
[08:22] | when I was a kid, but it was only the chinese stations, so– | 装了免费的有线 但只有中国台 所以 |
[08:31] | Judge Hernandez. | 赫尔南德斯法官 |
[08:32] | If you came to yell at judge Wright, | 如果你是来吼莱特法官的 |
[08:33] | she is not here. | 她不在 |
[08:35] | I was looking for you. | 我在找你 |
[08:36] | You’re a stylish fella, | 你这人挺时尚的 |
[08:38] | and, well, I thought maybe you could give me some pointers | 我想也许关于拍照 你可以给我 |
[08:40] | for my portrait. | 一些指点 |
[08:42] | Yeah. All right, well, yeah. | 好的 |
[08:43] | Great. | 太好了 |
[08:44] | – Let me see. – Okay. | -我看看 -好的 |
[08:45] | You know, we get you– I don’t know, maybe get you in– | 可以让你 也许让你 |
[08:48] | In the right suit– if you’re okay with, I don’t know, | 穿上合适的西装 你没意见吧 |
[08:50] | maybe trying a tie– the non-bolo variety. | 也许尝试下领带 非饰扣类型的 |
[08:54] | I could try that. | 我可以尝试下 |
[08:55] | Get some of the facial hairs, like, combed up. | 把胡子梳一下 |
[08:58] | And maybe thread the random eyebrows | 把长在鼻梁上的这些 |
[09:00] | that’s growing on the bridge of your nose. It’s– | 杂乱的眉毛整理一下 |
[09:02] | Well, my wife has mentioned those. | 我妻子提过这些 |
[09:05] | Well, thank you, Tedward. | 谢谢你 泰沃德 |
[09:06] | Really, it’s–it’s three very useful suggestions– | 这是三条非常有用的建议 |
[09:08] | Hey, hey, where you going? We’re not done yet. | 你去哪里 我还没说完呢 |
[09:10] | Let me–let me just look over right here real quick. | 我很快地看下这里 |
[09:12] | What? | 怎么了 |
[09:13] | We need to talk about your posture. | 我们要说说你的姿势 |
[09:14] | What? | 怎么了 |
[09:17] | See, you’re already an inch taller. | 你已经高了1英寸了 |
[09:18] | – That’s nice, man. – I am? | -非常好 -是吗 |
[09:19] | Yeah, we’re almost eye to eye. | 我们的眼睛快平视了 |
[09:23] | Wait. | 慢着 |
[09:24] | You’re going away for a night with Gary? | 你今晚和加里过夜 |
[09:26] | All right. | 好了 |
[09:27] | You undersold how serious you two are. | 你俩关系的认真程度你没说实话 |
[09:29] | Serious? No, we’re going to a hotel. | 不是吧 我们去酒店 |
[09:31] | That’s where prostitutes take their johns. | 那是妓女带嫖客去的地方 |
[09:33] | Well, it seems like it’s getting serious. | 看起来挺认真的 |
[09:35] | He’s inviting you away. | 他邀请你过夜 |
[09:37] | You’re actually folding your clothes. | 你在叠衣服 |
[09:39] | And I saw how jealous you got when he was dancing | 而且我看到他和其他女人跳舞时 |
[09:42] | with that other lady. | 你有多嫉妒 |
[09:43] | I was not jealous, okay? | 我没有嫉妒 |
[09:45] | I wasn’t. I just–you know, look, it just so happens | 我没有 只是碰巧 |
[09:47] | that Gary and I tend to do some of our best work | 加里和我倾向于在凌晨2点至4点 |
[09:50] | between the hours of 2:00 A.M. and 4:00 A.M. | “做”的状态最好 |
[09:54] | I think you need to just admit it. | 我想你需要大方承认 |
[09:55] | You’re in a relationship. | 你在谈恋爱 |
[09:57] | Oh, my god! | 我的天 |
[09:58] | It’s not a big deal. I get it. | 这没什么大不了 我懂 |
[10:00] | – He’s cute. – You think he’s cute? | -他很帅 -你觉得他帅吗 |
[10:01] | Oh, yeah. | 是的 |
[10:02] | We’re not, though. | 不过我们不是 |
[10:04] | We’re just like a couple of, uh, you know, | 我们就像两个 |
[10:06] | booty-call buds that enjoy eating chicken wings | 约炮哥们 喜欢在浴缸里 |
[10:09] | in the bathtub. | 吃鸡翅 |
[10:10] | Did you just write a country song? | 你刚写的是乡村歌曲吗 |
[10:12] | Yes, I did, and it’s called | 是的 歌名叫做 |
[10:13] | we’re not in a relationship. | 我们没有谈恋爱 |
[10:17] | – Yeah, no, no, I got it. – You got it? | -不用 我能行 -你能行吗 |
[10:19] | – Wow, this place is nice. – Yeah, it’s nice. | -这里真不错 -是不错 |
[10:21] | I mean, it’s nothing serious, but you know. | 没什么大不了的 |
[10:23] | No, I mean, look at all the happy couples. | 看这些幸福的夫妻 |
[10:25] | Nah, I think that most of these people | 不 我想大多数人是 |
[10:27] | are prostitutes with their johns. | 妓女和嫖客 |
[10:29] | – Really? – Yeah, this guy? | -是吗 -这家伙 |
[10:30] | Bet he paid a pretty penny for her. | 打赌为她出了大价钱 |
[10:32] | Ooh, truly is the oldest profession in the world. | 的确是世界上最古老的行业啊 |
[10:36] | Oh, jeez. | 老天 |
[10:37] | – Hey, we’re checking in. – Yes, we are. | -我们要入住 -是的 |
[10:39] | Ah, yes, welcome, Dr. and Mrs. Boyd. | 欢迎 博伊德医生及太太 |
[10:41] | Uh, no, no, no, it’s not missus. | 不是的 不是太太 |
[10:43] | I’m a judge. He’s barely a doctor. | 我是法官 他勉强算个医生 |
[10:45] | Head shrink. | 心理医生 |
[10:46] | We have you down for the anniversary package. | 帮你们登记的是结婚周年套餐 |
[10:48] | Is that right? | 对吗 |
[10:49] | What? | 什么 |
[10:50] | Otherwise, you can’t have | 否则 你们不能享用 |
[10:51] | the free champagne and strawberries. | 免费的香槟和草莓 |
[10:52] | Ten years today. Right, honey? | 十年纪念 对吗 亲爱的 |
[10:54] | Ah, yeah, it’s Rebecca. | 我是丽贝卡 |
[10:56] | It’s free. | 这是不要钱的 |
[11:01] | Hey, you barely touched your steak. | 你几乎没碰牛排 |
[11:02] | My halibut was awesome. | 我的比目鱼太好吃了 |
[11:04] | This place is just couples, couples, couples. | 这里全是一对对的 |
[11:06] | It’s like noah’s fricking ark in here. | 真是他妈的诺亚方舟 |
[11:08] | I mean, we’d be hard pressed to find a three-top | 要想在这家餐厅找出个前三 |
[11:10] | in this restaurant. | 还挺困难的 |
[11:11] | – You okay? – Yeah, yeah. | -你还好吗 -没事 |
[11:13] | I’m just blinded by a sea of diamond solitaires. | 只是钻石戒指的海洋把我亮瞎了 |
[11:16] | What’s that? | 这是什么 |
[11:17] | Well, while you were in the bathroom, | 你去厕所的时候 |
[11:18] | I ordered you another gin and tonic. | 我帮你点了一杯金汤力 |
[11:20] | Why would you assume I want another gin and tonic? | 你为什么觉得我会再来一杯金汤力 |
[11:23] | W–because you’re still in the single digits. | 因为你还没喝到两位数 |
[11:25] | Yeah, but maybe I want something else, you know? | 也许我想喝别的 |
[11:26] | You ever think of that? Maybe I want, I don’t know, | 你想过吗 也许我想要 |
[11:28] | a margarita or a glass of wine or a bourbon. | 玛格丽特 红酒或是波旁酒 |
[11:30] | Maybe I don’t want to be tied down to one drink | 也许我这辈子不想被一种酒 |
[11:32] | for the rest of my life. | 绑死 |
[11:35] | For dessert, your sampler platter for two. | 甜点 两人份的荟萃拼盘 |
[11:37] | – Bon appetit. – Ah, no, no, no, no, no. | -祝好胃口 -不不 |
[11:38] | Wait, wait. Did you order this? | 慢着 你点的吗 |
[11:40] | Well, no, it’s part of our package. | 不 这是套餐内容 |
[11:41] | Ah, yeah, no, no. We don’t share dessert. | 不 我们不分享甜点 |
[11:43] | We’re not there yet. Okay? So… | 我们还没到那一步 |
[11:45] | No, you know what? Give it to me. | 这样吧 给我 |
[11:46] | I’ll take it. Yeah, this is mine. | 我吃 这是我的 |
[11:47] | Mine, this is mine, so you should order your own dessert | 这是我的 你应该作为单独的一个人 |
[11:50] | as a separate person. | 点你自己的甜点 |
[11:52] | Okay, I have an idea. | 我有个主意 |
[11:53] | How about we get the check, okay? | 不如我们买单 |
[11:55] | We go up to the room, test out that bed. What’s up? | 我们去房间 测试下床怎么样 |
[11:57] | Or, um, hear me out. Wild pitch. | 听我说 扯太远了 |
[12:00] | Um, I go upstairs, get my own room, | 我上楼 回我自己的房间 |
[12:03] | and then we see where the night takes us | 然后我们作为地球上两个单独的人 |
[12:05] | as separate humans on the planet. | 看看今晚会有什么结果 |
[12:07] | Hmm. I’m not sure what’s happening right now. | 我不太明白现在的情况 |
[12:10] | I feel sick. Really, I’m cramping up. | 我想吐 胃痉挛了 |
[12:12] | I think I might need a doctor here. | 我想我需要一个医生 |
[12:14] | I’m a doctor. | 我就是医生 |
[12:15] | No, I mean like a real doctor. | 我是说真正的医生 |
[12:17] | Yeah, I’m a real doctor. | 我是真正的医生 |
[12:17] | No, I mean, like someone who went to medical school | 我是说上过医学院 |
[12:20] | and can prescribe medication. | 可以开处方药的医生 |
[12:21] | Yeah, still me. | 我就是这样的医生 |
[12:22] | Gary. | 加里 |
[12:24] | – You’re, like, suffocating me. – What’s going on? | -你令我窒息了 -出什么事了 |
[12:27] | Why do you have to ask what’s going on? | 你为什么要问出什么事了 |
[12:28] | Gary, I mean, what– | 加里 |
[12:29] | Stop taking the temperature of our not-relationship, okay? | 别再给我们的非恋爱关系测温 |
[12:33] | This is supposed to be fun, | 今晚本应该开心的 |
[12:35] | and suddenly, it’s getting all weird and heavy, you know? | 突然间 变得这么奇怪凝重 |
[12:39] | It’s like that weird finale in M.A.S.H | 就像《野战医院》的奇怪大结局 |
[12:41] | where Hawkeye makes that lady kill the chicken. | 鹰眼让那个女人杀鸡 |
[12:45] | Yeah. | 是的 |
[12:47] | It wasn’t a chicken, gary. | 那不是鸡 加里 |
[12:49] | It was a baby. | 那是宝宝 |
[12:51] | Oh, get up. You’re embarrassing yourself. | 起来吧 你真丢人 |
[12:58] | – Oh, Tedward. – Yeah, Judge, hey– | -泰沃德 -法官 |
[13:01] | Oh, sir, hey– is–is that you? | 先生 是你吗 |
[13:04] | I followed your advice, and I do believe | 我听从了你的建议 我相信 |
[13:06] | I am ready to take this picture. | 我已经准备好拍照了 |
[13:08] | Uh, well, I see you in the shirt. | 这件衬衫不错 |
[13:11] | I see you in the shirt, looks good. | 衬衫不错 看起来很帅 |
[13:12] | Did you–did you do something else? | 你做了别的吗 |
[13:14] | No, no, you’re right. The clothes do make me look younger. | 没 你是对的 这衣服令我年轻 |
[13:17] | Hey, Tedward. | 泰沃德 |
[13:18] | Good afternoon, judge Hernand–hey! | 下午好 赫尔南德斯法… |
[13:21] | Why? | 为什么 |
[13:23] | Judge Hernandez is getting ready for his new portrait. | 赫尔南德斯法官准备拍新的肖像照 |
[13:27] | Hi, Tedward. Hi, Tom. | 泰沃德 汤姆 |
[13:29] | Hello, Judy. | 你好 茱迪 |
[13:30] | Whoa, Judge. | 法官 |
[13:31] | I didn’t recognize you. What happened? | 我没认出你 出什么事了 |
[13:33] | Did you trip and fall on a sharpie? | 你摔倒在记号笔上了吗 |
[13:35] | – Judy. No. – She’s right. | -茱迪 别瞎说 -她是对的 |
[13:38] | This is ridiculous. | 太可笑了 |
[13:40] | I can’t do this picture like this. | 我不能这样拍照 |
[13:42] | I mean, come on, Judge. | 拜托 法官 |
[13:43] | You’re gonna take a great photo, okay? | 你会拍出好照片的 |
[13:45] | Yes, and your legacy is very important to this courthouse. | 你留给后人的对法院来说非常重要 |
[13:49] | So just give us that look | 让我们看看 |
[13:51] | of authority you project from the bench. | 你在法官席上的权威表情 |
[13:53] | Go! | 开始 |
[13:55] | – Just go! – I’m doing it! | -开始 -我正做呢 |
[13:57] | Yup, there it is! | 没错 |
[13:58] | Yeah, that’s it. | 没错 |
[13:59] | – That was it. I saw it. – Oh, hey, Judge. | -就是这样 我看到了 -法官 |
[14:01] | Do you have any more of that? | 你还有染发剂吗 |
[14:02] | I wanna dye all my cats the same color and see | 我想把我所有的猫全染成一个颜色 |
[14:04] | if I can still tell them apart by their personality. | 然后看我能否通过性格来区别 |
[14:06] | This is absurd. | 真是荒谬 |
[14:09] | That could be fun. | 很有意思的 |
[14:11] | Thelma and Louise ride again! | 塞尔玛和露易丝又开车上路了 |
[14:14] | I don’t think they’re gonna ride ever again. | 我想她们不可能再开车上路了 |
[14:16] | Oh, no, tell me they did not go to jail. | 别说她们坐牢了 |
[14:18] | They do not go to jail. | 她们没坐牢[死了] |
[14:20] | Sweet! | 太好了 |
[14:22] | What is wrong with– we’ve been here an hour, | 你怎么啦 我们来了一小时 |
[14:24] | and you’re only halfway through your first drink. | 你第一杯酒才喝一半 |
[14:26] | Okay, okay, what happened at the Crestwick with you and Gary? | 你和加里在克瑞斯威克酒店发生了什么事 |
[14:30] | I left. | 我走了 |
[14:32] | Yeah, I don’t think I can see Gary anymore. | 我想我不能再见加里了 |
[14:34] | Why? | 为什么 |
[14:35] | Because I think he wants to have a relationship, | 因为我觉得他想谈恋爱 |
[14:37] | and I just wanna have fun. | 而我只想开心 |
[14:39] | You know, he starts having feelings, I have feelings. | 他开始有感觉 我有感觉 |
[14:42] | Feelings sicken me. | 感觉让我恶心 |
[14:44] | Well, what did he say? | 他说了什么 |
[14:46] | Well, he didn’t say anything to me, okay? | 他没对我说什么 |
[14:49] | We didn’t talk about it. | 我们没说这事 |
[14:50] | I mean, that’s why I don’t wanna have a relationship | 所以我不想要恋情 |
[14:52] | because then you have to do things like have discussions | 因为你必须讨论恋情 |
[14:54] | about the relationship– it’s like a vicious cycle. | 这就像是恶性循环 |
[14:56] | Okay, all right, listen, you have got to talk to him, | 听着 你得跟他谈谈 |
[14:59] | so you can find out if you guys even want different things… | 这样你才能知道你们要的不同 |
[15:01] | Same things. | 还是相同 |
[15:03] | I know you like him. | 我知道你喜欢他 |
[15:03] | – Yeah, you do. – Yeah, you do, | -你喜欢 -没错 |
[15:04] | because you ditched me at a club for him | 你为了他在夜店把我甩了 |
[15:06] | – while I had an open tab. – Yeah. | -我请客呢 -没错 |
[15:09] | You had an open tab? | 你请客 |
[15:10] | Captain Kahlua cost me a fortune. | 咖啡力娇酒队长害我破财了 |
[15:12] | Well, you know what, what can I say? | 叫我怎么说呢 |
[15:13] | This black american loves white russians. | 这个黑美国人喜欢白俄罗斯[鸡尾酒] |
[15:21] | Hey, Judge. You’re up in a few minutes. | 法官 你有时间吗 |
[15:23] | I was hoping you wouldn’t find me in here. | 我还希望你不会在这里找到我 |
[15:26] | Come on, Judge. | 拜托 法官 |
[15:28] | Why don’t you wanna take this picture? | 你为什么不想拍照 |
[15:30] | Because that guy on that wall is young, | 因为墙上的人很年轻 |
[15:32] | and this guy is old. | 而这个人老了 |
[15:35] | And I hate knowing that the next picture they’re going | 我讨厌想到下张照片 |
[15:37] | to take of me is the one they’ll use when I retire, | 是拍来退休时用的 |
[15:39] | the picture they’ll use when I die. | 我死后用的 |
[15:41] | I mean, no offense, Judge, | 无意冒犯 法官 |
[15:43] | but the picture that you have up there right now | 但现在墙上照片里的那个人 |
[15:44] | looks like a dude who died when he found out | 像是发现自己的 |
[15:46] | his vhs movie collection was worthless. | 电影录像带收藏一文不值后挂了 |
[15:49] | It is? | 是吗 |
[15:50] | I thought it would come back like vinyl. | 我以为录像带会像唱片一样又流行起来 |
[15:53] | No, but the point is, you look great. | 不 但重点是 你看起来很棒 |
[15:55] | You look like you. | 你看起来像你 |
[15:57] | Here. | 给 |
[15:59] | You look like a judge that demands the best | 你看起来是法官 要求每一个走过 |
[16:02] | from everybody that walks through those doors, | 法院大门的人 都做到最好 |
[16:06] | somebody who lets everyone know that they deserve justice. | 你让每个人知道 他们值得拥有公正 |
[16:12] | Let’s take a photo. | 我们拍照吧 |
[16:14] | Yeah. All right. | 好的 |
[16:16] | Oh, one last thing. | 最后一件事 |
[16:19] | Lose that tie, man. That ain’t you. | 不要领带 这不是你的风格 |
[16:21] | You gotta rock that bolo. | 你得把饰扣带出型 |
[16:23] | Tedward, | 泰沃德 |
[16:25] | I never stopped rocking the bolo. | 我从未停止把饰扣带出型 |
[16:27] | I see you. | 我看到了 |
[16:29] | This bolo, it’s all under the tie. | 饰扣的风采全在领带下了 |
[16:31] | Okay, if this room full of people cannot communicate | 如果满屋子的人还不能和林先生沟通 |
[16:34] | with Mr. Lin, I’m going to have a nervous breakdown. | 那我就要崩溃了 |
[16:36] | So will you please ask Mr. Lin | 麻烦你问林先生 |
[16:39] | what he’s doing in front of that store? | 他在餐馆门口做什么 |
[16:44] | Point, point, point. Sound it out. | 指指指 说出来 |
[16:47] | Running man. | 奔跑的人 |
[16:57] | He’s trying to start a shoeshine business, | 他想做擦鞋的生意 |
[16:59] | but people think he’s homeless. | 但人们以为他无家可归 |
[17:00] | When they give him money, | 人们给他钱 |
[17:02] | he thinks they want their shoes shined, | 他以为他们想擦鞋 |
[17:04] | so he tries to grab their shoes. | 所以他抢他们的鞋 |
[17:06] | And they think that he’s trying to steal from them, | 人们以为他想偷鞋 |
[17:09] | when in actuality, he’s trying to provide them with a service. | 但事实上 他是想向人们提供服务 |
[17:12] | It’s still loitering, your honor. | 这依然是流浪 法官阁下 |
[17:14] | He is impeding the ability of saladictatorship | 他吓跑了顾客 |
[17:17] | to do business by scaring away the customers. | 妨碍了”沙拉独裁”的生意 |
[17:20] | Even more so than their name already does. | 虽然餐馆的名字本身就够吓人了 |
[17:23] | He didn’t know he was doing anything wrong. | 他不知道他做了错事 |
[17:25] | Well, the state will consider a dismissal, | 州检会考虑撤诉 |
[17:27] | but he still has to pay the fine. | 但他还是要交罚款 |
[17:29] | Mr. Lin–what’s happening over here with Mr. Lin? | 林先生这是怎么回事 |
[17:32] | He said this man has the genitalia of a small chicken. | 他说这个人长着小鸡般的生殖器 |
[17:35] | Oh, a chicken penis! | 小鸡老二 |
[17:37] | So tiny. | 太小了 |
[17:38] | Tom, not only am I not going to fine him, | 汤姆 我不仅不会罚款 |
[17:40] | but we’re going to help Mr. Lin out–that’s right. | 而且我们会帮助林先生 没错 |
[17:42] | We’re gonna pass the hat, and we’re gonna raise some money | 我们会展开募捐 |
[17:44] | to get Mr. Lin a permit and a sign. | 为林先生获得执照和招牌 |
[17:48] | Yeah, I will start. | 我先开始 |
[17:49] | I’ve got a few pairs of shoes in my chambers. | 我的内庭有几双鞋子 |
[17:51] | Tell him to set up at the tower on Sepulveda. | 告诉他在塞普维达的高楼做生意 |
[17:53] | He’ll get good traffic there. Yeah? | 那里的业务量不错 |
[17:55] | Case dismissed. | 此案驳回 |
[18:00] | Oh, chicken penis. You know what? | 小鸡老二 知道吗 |
[18:02] | It is a pleasure to watch you work. | 看你工作真快乐 |
[18:06] | Thank you, sir. | 谢谢你 先生 |
[18:07] | Everyone deserves to be heard, | 所有人都有发言权 |
[18:08] | even if it does take about eight people to get it done. | 哪怕是需要8个人来完成 |
[18:11] | Mm-hmm, everybody except Gary. | 所有人除了加里 |
[18:14] | Oh! Drops mic! | 丢掉麦 |
[18:16] | Tedward, how many times have I told you not to drop the mic? | 泰沃德 我得跟你说多少次不要丢麦 |
[18:21] | Pick it up. | 捡起来 |
[18:25] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
[18:26] | And turn it off, please. | 请关掉 |
[18:33] | Hey, Gary, thanks for coming by. | 加里 感谢你能来 |
[18:36] | Yeah, no problem. | 没问题 |
[18:36] | I was just testifying down the hall | 我刚在走道头 |
[18:38] | for a guy who dry-humped a bunch of mailboxes. | 为上了不少邮箱的人作证 |
[18:40] | I gotta say, | 我得说 |
[18:41] | I understand his behavior more than I do yours. | 比起你的行为 我更了解他的 |
[18:43] | I know. I know. | 我知道 |
[18:45] | I’m sorry, Gary. I just started–I don’t know. | 对不起 加里 我只是开始 |
[18:48] | I-I started to feel like a cat in a cage, you know? | 我开始觉得我是笼子里的猫 |
[18:52] | It’s like–it’s like I’m an exotic tiger, right? | 就像我是异国的老虎 |
[18:55] | Like a bengal tiger, right? | 孟拉加虎 |
[18:57] | And I need to roam in the jungle and be free. | 我需要在丛林漫步 我要自由 |
[18:59] | But I felt like you were like a poacher, right? | 但我觉得你是偷猎者 |
[19:01] | And you were just coming in, like, all boom! | 你来之后就这样 |
[19:03] | And take my tail and make some kind of medicine | 夺走了我的尾巴做药 |
[19:05] | or–or worse, like, a keychain. | 或是更糟 比如说钥匙扣 |
[19:07] | You can’t use my tail as a keychain, Gary! | 你不能用我的尾巴做钥匙扣 |
[19:11] | Yeah. Yeah, wow. You see? | 是的 吃惊吧 你瞧 |
[19:13] | Like, I gotta be–I gotta, like, go–mm–out of the cage. | 我要离开笼子 |
[19:17] | Right? I wanna be roaming in that tall grass. | 我要在高高的草丛中漫步 |
[19:20] | I wanna see something. | 我要见识 |
[19:21] | I wanna take it down. I wanna hunt. | 我要征服 我要狩猎 |
[19:22] | I wanna be free and, like, have fun and sun myself and– | 我要自由 我要快乐 享受阳光 |
[19:25] | Okay, okay, I feel like whatever we have, | 好的 我觉得无论我们的关系是什么 |
[19:28] | you are this close to bailing on it, | 你差不多就要放弃了 |
[19:30] | so there’s something I need to do. | 所以我需要做件事 |
[19:34] | Whoa, whoa, Gary, did you not just understand | 加里 你不明白 |
[19:36] | this whole cat story? | 猫的故事吗 |
[19:37] | Rebecca– what’s your middle name? | 丽贝卡 你中间名是什么 |
[19:40] | – Gary– – Okay. | -加里 -好的 |
[19:41] | Rebecca Gary Wright, | 丽贝卡·加里·莱特 |
[19:43] | will you never, ever marry me? | 你愿意永远别嫁给我吗 |
[19:46] | What? | 什么 |
[19:47] | I wanna wake up in the morning in an empty bed | 我想早上在空空的床上醒来 |
[19:49] | because you’re already gone. | 因为你已经走了 |
[19:51] | When you’re sick, I want to be somewhere else. | 你生病的时候 我想在其它地方 |
[19:53] | Anywhere else. | 不待你旁边就行 |
[19:55] | And when we are 75, | 我们75岁时 |
[19:56] | I wanna look across the table and see a 25-year-old. | 我想在餐桌对面 看到25岁的美女 |
[19:59] | I want the same for you too. | 我也希望你这样 |
[20:01] | Rebecca, I’m not thinking about the future, | 丽贝卡 我没考虑未来 |
[20:03] | but you are cool, and you’re hot. | 但你很酷 很性感 |
[20:05] | And damn, girl, you mad flexible. | 见鬼 美女 你柔韧性太好了 |
[20:09] | – Oh, girl. – Girl. | -美女 -美女 |
[20:11] | Gary, man, you– | 加里 你 |
[20:16] | You’re good. | 你真好 |
[20:17] | Good. | 很好 |
[20:18] | You got a deal. | 说好了 |
[20:19] | Let’s just have fun. | 我们只要开心就好 |
[20:20] | – I love it. – Okay. I love it. | -我爱死了 -我也爱死了 |
[20:25] | I mean I love it, not you. | 我是说我爱这情况 不是你 |
[20:27] | – No, no, I get it. – Okay. | -我明白 -好的 |
[20:32] | To never knowing each other. | 敬永远不了解对方 |
[20:38] | Nice. | 真爽 |
[20:40] | I want another shot. You want another shot? | 我要再来一杯 你要吗 |
[20:43] | Oh, yeah, let’s go halfsies, though–cleaner that way. | 我们AA吧 这样更好算 |
[20:45] | Aw, Gary. | 加里 |
[20:47] | – Gary! – What’s up, Tedward? | -加里 -还好吗 泰沃德 |
[20:49] | Seems like you two are back on track. | 看来你们回归正轨了 |
[20:52] | 100% committed to noncommitment. | 百分百承诺不做承诺 |
[20:54] | Which is perfect, you know, ’cause it’s what we both want. | 太好了 这是我们想要的 |
[20:56] | Yeah. Yeah. | 是啊 |
[20:57] | Look at Rebecca making out with that dude at the bar. | 瞧丽贝卡在吧台和那家伙舌吻 |
[20:59] | What? | 什么 |
[21:02] | Tedward, all right, okay. | 泰沃德 好了 |
[21:03] | No, I was not finish it. | 不 我还没笑完 |