| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:01] | I figured out Franklin’s anniversary gift. | 我知道该送富兰克林什么周年礼物了 |
| [00:03] | Have you guys been together two years already? | 你们已经在一起两年了吗 |
| [00:05] | No. It’s the anniversary of the first time | 不 是我们第一次分享 |
| [00:08] | we shared the same piece of gum. | 同一块口香糖的纪念日 |
| [00:10] | I hope you got to go first. | 希望你是第一个吃的 |
| [00:11] | And third. | 也是第三个 |
| [00:13] | What are you getting Franklin? | 你要送富兰克林什么 |
| [00:14] | I’m gonna make him a licorice cake. | 我要给他做一个甘草蛋糕 |
| [00:16] | Nothing excites the kid more | 没什么能比二战时代前的甜品 |
| [00:17] | than a pre-World War II era dessert. | 更能让孩子激动的了 |
| [00:20] | Oh, stop wasting your time. | 别浪费你的时间了 |
| [00:21] | Anniversaries are just lame creations by Hallmark | 纪念日都是贺曼公司搞出来的无聊产物 |
| [00:24] | to make you think love is real. | 为了让你觉得爱是真的 |
| [00:25] | Mom, can boys have a time of the month? | 妈妈 男生们也会有生理期吗 |
| [00:27] | Absolutely. | 当然 |
| [00:29] | The symptom to watch for in your father | 你爸身上的症状 |
| [00:30] | is complaining about the water bill. | 就是抱怨水费单 |
| [00:35] | – What’s up? – Nothing. | -怎么了 -没事 |
| [00:37] | Really? Because you seem like someone | 是吗 因为你看上去就像 |
| [00:38] | who just saw the girl he took to the prom, | 刚遇到自己带去毕业舞会的女孩 |
| [00:40] | who he thought he was kind of dating, | 以为她和自己算是约会了 |
| [00:42] | and found out that she was back in town | 但发现她回到镇上 |
| [00:43] | and didn’t call him. | 却没打给自己 |
| [00:45] | That’s just the vibe I’m getting. | 这只是我感受到的氛围 |
| [00:47] | Oh, Taylor told you. | 泰勒告诉你了 |
| [00:48] | Yes, I have a Lindsey-shaped hole in my heart. | 是的 我的心上有个琳赛形状的洞 |
| [00:50] | But the pain has become my companion. | 但伤痛成为了我的陪伴 |
| [00:52] | Moping around the house is not going to help you feel better. | 在房子里闷闷不乐对你没有任何帮助 |
| [00:55] | Why don’t you come to Stewart and Kingston’s with me | 跟我一起去斯金餐厅吧 |
| [00:57] | and we can pick up a few things? | 我们能买点东西 |
| [00:59] | No thanks. | 不了谢谢 |
| [01:02] | Oh, I see. | 我知道了 |
| [01:03] | There’s been a misunderstanding. | 我们之间误会了 |
| [01:04] | I used a friendly tone. | 我用了友善的语气 |
| [01:07] | My mistake. | 我的错 |
| [01:08] | Get your ass in the car. | 快给老娘上车 |
| [01:11] | That felt right. | 这感觉对了 |
| [01:21] | According to the City Council election polls, | 根据市议会选举民意调查 |
| [01:22] | you’re in fourth place. | 你排第四 |
| [01:23] | How is that possible when there are only three people running? | 怎么可能 只有三个人在竞选啊 |
| [01:26] | A lot of people are planning to write in Kanye. | 很多人计划选卡内 |
| [01:28] | And the main reason you’re in last place | 而你垫底的主要原因 |
| [01:30] | is that slimy frontrunner, Steve Hobert. | 是那个虚伪的领跑者史蒂夫·霍巴特 |
| [01:32] | I know. He’s dumping tons of money | 我知道 他花了很多钱 |
| [01:34] | into negative ads against me. | 投放关于我的负面广告 |
| [01:35] | Well, you’re my campaign manager. | 你是我的竞选经理 |
| [01:36] | There must be some way to stop him. | 肯定有什么办法能阻止他 |
| [01:39] | How about we take him out of the race entirely? | 我们把他完全从竞选中除掉怎么样 |
| [01:41] | – How? – I did some recon. | -怎么做 -我做了些侦查 |
| [01:43] | I followed him around. I got something good. | 我跟踪了他 挖到了一些猛料 |
| [01:45] | What? Hookers? Drugs? | 什么 妓女 还是毒品 |
| [01:46] | Nah, dude, “Grand Theft Auto” Made those cool. | 不 老兄 《侠盗飞车》让这些变得很酷了 |
| [01:48] | That would get him elected. | 那会让他赢得竞选的 |
| [01:50] | No, I found out that Hobert gets his feet massaged | 不 我发现霍巴特每周三都会在诺瓦克 |
| [01:52] | at the same place in Norwalk every Wednesday. | 同一个地方做足底按摩 |
| [01:54] | How does that help me? | 这怎么能帮到我 |
| [01:55] | Because I slipped a masseuse there $5 | 因为我给了一个女按摩师五块钱 |
| [01:58] | and then $25, and then a Mazda Miata, | 然后25块钱 然后给了辆马自达汽车 |
| [02:00] | and she told me that Hobert gets super relaxed, | 接着她告诉我霍巴特会变得超级放松 |
| [02:03] | starts talking all this smack about Westport. | 开始讲西港的坏话 |
| [02:05] | Apparently, he thinks this is a dinky little town | 显然 他认为这是个微不足道的小镇 |
| [02:08] | and just a stepping stone to him becoming a congressman. | 是个助他成为国会议员的垫脚石 |
| [02:11] | So, all we have to do is record him | 所以我们只需要录下来 |
| [02:12] | bad-mouthing Westport and put it on the Internet. | 他讲西港的坏话 并放到网上 |
| [02:15] | Exactly! | 没错 |
| [02:21] | I will throw on one of these disguises | 我会穿上一套 |
| [02:23] | that I use for my prank videos. | 我拍恶作剧视频的伪装 |
| [02:24] | I will go down to the massage parlor | 我会去到按摩院 |
| [02:26] | and I will record the Hobert scandal | 用一架隐藏摄像机 |
| [02:27] | with a hidden camera. | 录下霍巴特的丑闻 |
| [02:29] | Then I’m gonna go to my buddy’s house, | 然后我会去我哥们家 |
| [02:31] | trick him into making out with me. | 骗他和我亲热 |
| [02:33] | Boom! Three million views. | 三百万播放有了 |
| [02:34] | No, you will not spy on Hobert. | 不 你不会去监视霍巴特 |
| [02:38] | I’ll do it. | 我会去 |
| [02:39] | It’s my political victory on the line, | 这是我的政治胜利 |
| [02:43] | Look whose plums just dropped. | 看看是谁变男人了 |
| [02:45] | I love the new Greg. | 我爱新的格雷格 |
| [02:46] | Fun fact, did you know that plums | 有趣的小事实 你知道李子 |
| [02:48] | were a sign of courtship in feudal Japan? | 在封建日本是求爱的标志吗 |
| [02:50] | Old Greg clawing his ass back. | 旧的格雷格又回来了 |
| [02:52] | So, it’s kind of weird we haven’t talked, | 我们还没谈过 有点奇怪 |
| [02:55] | you know, about what happened at Stewart and Kingston’s. | 关于在斯金餐厅发生的事 |
| [02:58] | You mean when I was with Andre | 你是说我当时和安德烈一起 |
| [02:59] | and you were with that girl from work? | 而你和那个工作上的姑娘一起吗 |
| [03:00] | Stella and I are just friends. | 我跟斯特拉只是朋友 |
| [03:02] | It’s fine. | 没关系 |
| [03:03] | And, uh, Andre and I aren’t — | 我跟安德烈也不是… |
| [03:05] | No, I know. I know. | 不 我知道 我知道 |
| [03:09] | But we need to talk. | 但我们需要谈谈 |
| [03:12] | This is really hard. | 这真的很难 |
| [03:15] | Uh, I love you so much, | 我真的很爱你 |
| [03:17] | but I feel like… | 但我觉得… |
| [03:21] | Like you need some space? | 你可能需要一些空间 |
| [03:23] | Or were you gonna say a snack? | 还是说你想要零食 |
| [03:24] | ‘Cause I have some gummy worms in the car. | 因为我车里有些毛虫软糖 |
| [03:26] | – Trip. – You need some space. | -特里普 -你需要一些空间 |
| [03:30] | – I get it. – You do? | -我明白 -你明白 |
| [03:31] | I was kind of thinking the same thing. | 我也在想同样的事 |
| [03:33] | How can we be sure that we’re meant to be together | 如果我们从没和别人在一起过 |
| [03:35] | if we’ve never been with anyone else? | 那我们怎么能确定我们是彼此的命中注定 |
| [03:37] | You’re not just saying that to make me feel better? | 你不是为了让我好受才说的吗 |
| [03:39] | No, I even wrote it in Sharpie on my hand. | 不 我甚至用记号笔写在手上了 |
| [03:42] | I ran out of space ’cause I always write too big | 我地方不够了 因为我总是一开始 |
| [03:44] | in the beginning. You know? | 就写很大 |
| [03:46] | I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. | 我不敢相信我们在谈论这些 |
| [03:48] | Babe, it’s okay. | 宝贝 没事的 |
| [03:51] | If we’re supposed to be together forever, | 如果我们命中注定永远在一起 |
| [03:53] | then we’ll find our way back someday. | 那我们总有一天会回到一起的 |
| [03:58] | So what do we do now? | 那我们现在怎么办 |
| [04:00] | I guess, uh… | 我猜… |
| [04:03] | I’ll see ya. | 回见 |
| [04:06] | Yeah, see ya. | 回见 |
| [04:08] | Oh, wait, there’s something else I have to tell you. | 等下 我还有别的话想跟你说 |
| [04:10] | Fuji apples, only if firm. | 富士苹果 只要硬的 |
| [04:14] | Forget it. That was for my mom. | 当我没说 这是要跟我妈说的 |
| [04:35] | See? | 看 |
| [04:36] | Isn’t it good getting out of the house? | 走出房子不是挺好的吗 |
| [04:38] | My house is my pain and I can never truly leave. | 我的房子就是我的痛苦 而我将永远不能离开 |
| [04:41] | I’m seconds away from slapping you. | 我离扇你只差零点零一米 |
| [04:44] | Oliver, right? | 奥利弗 是吗 |
| [04:46] | You’re in my econ class. | 我们上同一节经济课 |
| [04:47] | I should really deny you service | 我真该拒绝为你服务 |
| [04:49] | for always acing those tests and messing up the curve. | 因为你总是在测验中考得那么好 |
| [04:52] | Audra. | 奥德拉 |
| [04:53] | Right. Hey. | 没错 你好 |
| [04:55] | It’s nice to see you outside of school. | 很高兴在学校外见到你 |
| [04:57] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [04:58] | Do you want a free sample? | 你想要个免费样品吗 |
| [05:00] | Choose anything you want. | 想要哪个都行 |
| [05:01] | If I stick my thumb in it, it becomes a sample. | 如果我把拇指插进去了 那就成为样品了 |
| [05:05] | Nah. | 不用了 |
| [05:09] | Thank you. | 谢谢 |
| [05:12] | What the hell is wrong with you? | 你有什么毛病 |
| [05:14] | She was into you! Why did you ignore her? | 她很喜欢你 你为什么无视她 |
| [05:15] | I’m just not in the right place | 我现在不适合 |
| [05:17] | to start something with another girl. | 跟另一个女孩开展新恋情 |
| [05:18] | Well, you better get in the right place, | 你最好赶快适合 |
| [05:19] | because I’m tired of this mopey Oliver. | 因为我简直受够了这个消沉的奥利弗 |
| [05:21] | I miss my terrible, overconfident, douchebag Oliver. | 我想念我糟糕 自负的人渣奥利弗 |
| [05:25] | For now, I’m just gonna focus on school | 目前 我将专注于学校 |
| [05:26] | and getting into Harvard. | 和考进哈佛 |
| [05:27] | That’s your dad in you talking. | 这是你体内的老爸基因在说话 |
| [05:29] | You need to harness your inner me and sack up. | 你得让你体内我的基因站起来 |
| [05:31] | I don’t need your help. Just stay out of it. | 我不需要你的帮助 别掺和 |
| [05:32] | You can’t just have a work life. You need a social life! | 你不能只有工作生活 你还得有社交生活 |
| [05:35] | A social life with boobs! | 有乳房的社交生活 |
| [05:39] | Happy anniversary! | 纪念日快乐 |
| [05:40] | I made you this licorice cake from scratch. | 我从零开始 给你做的这个甘草蛋糕 |
| [05:43] | No way. A pre-World War II era dessert! | 不是吧 二战时代前的甜品 |
| [05:50] | The frosting has the decadence of the Roaring Twenties. | 糖霜有着咆哮年代的颓废感 |
| [05:54] | The cake is moist and somber like the Great Depression. | 蛋糕就像大萧条一样潮湿忧郁 |
| [05:57] | That’s exactly what I was going for. | 这正是我追求的效果 |
| [05:59] | Now, for your gift, please sit back | 现在 给你的礼物 请做好 |
| [06:01] | and enjoy the show. | 欣赏我的表演 |
| [06:09] | ♪ My mom’s minivan warms me to my core ♪ | *我妈妈的面包车 暖到我心窝* |
| [06:11] | ♪ I have a special secret handshake with every door ♪ | *我和每扇门 都会秘密握手* |
| [06:13] | ♪ Chariot of my mother, I could never choose another ♪ | *我妈妈的战车 我绝不会另选其他* |
| [06:16] | ♪ Your six cupholders make my little heart flutter ♪ | *你的六轮杯托 让我心脏乱跳* |
| [06:18] | ♪ Minivan, minivan, you taught me to love ♪ | *面包车 面包车 教我如何去爱* |
| [06:20] | ♪ Wrapped in your seatbelt is my favorite hug ♪ | *系好安全带 是我的最爱* |
| [06:23] | ♪ On a hot day your AC never misses ♪ | *很热的天 空调不会坏* |
| [06:25] | ♪ The air in my face is like you’re blowing me kisses ♪ | *吹到我脸上的风 就像你的亲吻* |
| [06:29] | What was that? | 那是什么 |
| [06:31] | I wrote you a song. | 我给你写了首歌 |
| [06:32] | About your mother’s car? | 关于你妈妈的车吗 |
| [06:34] | My gift was super thoughtful, and you give me this? | 我的礼物那么贴心 你就给我这个 |
| [06:37] | It had nothing to do with us. | 这根本和我们无关 |
| [06:42] | The worst part is your flow is so fire, | 最糟的是 你的旋律太上口了 |
| [06:45] | it’s gonna be in my head for the rest of the day! | 肯定要在我脑袋里盘旋一整天了 |
| [06:54] | Thanks again for taking me out. | 多谢你带我出来 |
| [06:55] | That was my first time seeing a foreign film. | 那是我第一次看外国电影 |
| [06:57] | Yeah, yeah, I gathered that when you started | 你开始唱字幕 而不是读字幕时 |
| [06:59] | singing the subtitles instead of reading them to yourself. | 我就大概猜到了 |
| [07:01] | I thought it was a sing-a-long. | 我以为是合唱 |
| [07:02] | Well, I mean, the good news is | 好消息是 |
| [07:04] | that you have a really beautiful voice. | 你的嗓音很好听 |
| [07:06] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [07:10] | Sorry, I-I-I thought you wanted to kiss me. | 抱歉 我以为你想吻我 |
| [07:12] | Oh, I-I did! Um, I don’t know what happened. | 是的 我不知道发生了什么 |
| [07:14] | Uh, let’s try that again. | 我们再试一次 |
| [07:16] | Oh, okay. | 好的 |
| [07:20] | Forehead, cheek. | 额头 脸颊 |
| [07:22] | I’m starting to feel like your grandma. | 我开始觉得自己是你祖母了 |
| [07:23] | I’m so sorry. | 我很抱歉 |
| [07:24] | I-I really don’t know what’s happening. | 我真的不知道发生了什么 |
| [07:26] | Taylor, you’re getting out of a serious relationship. | 泰勒 你刚走出一段认真的感情 |
| [07:29] | It’s just bad timing, which is unfortunate for me, | 现在时机不对 这对我来说很不幸 |
| [07:32] | because…well, I really like you. | 因为 我确实很喜欢你 |
| [07:36] | I guess call me, you know, | 打给我吧 也许 |
| [07:38] | if you, uh, ever regain control of your body, that is. | 如果你能重新恢复对你身体的掌控 |
| [07:49] | And ever since that, Oliver’s confidence has been shattered. | 从那以后 奥利弗的信心就被打破了 |
| [07:52] | He even blew off Audra who works the register. | 他甚至无视收银处的奥德拉 |
| [07:55] | Oh, why? Audra is so cute. | 为什么 奥德拉那么可爱 |
| [07:57] | He just needs a little help getting back in the saddle. | 他只是需要一点帮助 让他重回掌控 |
| [07:59] | Maybe we can help him make the first move. | 也许我们可以帮他走出第一步 |
| [08:01] | Ooh, that sounds good. What’s your plan? | 听起来不错 你有什么计划 |
| [08:02] | I’m an idea person. | 我是出主意的人 |
| [08:03] | I don’t really have a follow-through. | 我没有后续动作 |
| [08:05] | – I’m in. – Ugh, damn it. | -我加入 -该死 |
| [08:07] | I keep forgetting to move that fourth chair. | 我一直忘了拿走第四把椅子 |
| [08:09] | You need me. Hear me out. | 你需要我 听我说完 |
| [08:11] | I know Audra’s last name from the employee roster. | 我从雇员手册上知道了奥德拉的姓 |
| [08:13] | So, we can find her on Instagram | 所以我们能在INS上找到她 |
| [08:15] | and message her as Oliver. | 装成奥利弗给她发信息 |
| [08:20] | I hate to admit it, but I love that idea. | 我讨厌承认 但我喜欢这个主意 |
| [08:23] | All we need is Oliver’s password. | 我们只需要奥利弗的密码 |
| [08:25] | Well, I’ve got access to his Instagram. | 我能登入他的INS |
| [08:27] | He logged in on my phone once when he misplaced his | 他有一次用我的手机登入了他的账号 |
| [08:30] | and thought I logged out because “I promised.” | 并以为我已经登出了 因为”我保证了” |
| [08:32] | Promises to kids are non-binding and hilarious. | 对孩子们的承诺是滑稽又没有约束力的 |
| [08:37] | First thing we do is turn off his notifications | 我们要做的第一件事就是关掉他的通知 |
| [08:39] | so he doesn’t get any alerts on his phone. | 所以他不会在自己的手机上收到通知 |
| [08:41] | This is not my first stalking rodeo. | 这不是我第一次跟踪表演了 |
| [08:44] | Tami, you’ve got intelligence. | 塔米 你有才智 |
| [08:45] | J.D., you got style, | J.D. 你有风格 |
| [08:46] | and I’ve got confidence bordering on cockiness. | 我有接近于自大的自信 |
| [08:49] | And I’m the guy who doesn’t know or respect personal boundaries. | 而我是一个不知道也不尊重个人界限的男人 |
| [08:52] | So I’ve been told in court. | 有人在法庭上告诉我的 |
| [08:53] | Together we make one kick-ass 17-year-old boy! | 我们一起 就是一个完美的17岁男孩 |
| [08:58] | I’m just gonna start things off by saying “Sup?” | 我就用”怎么样”来开头吧 |
| [09:02] | Oh, my God, she sent me a smiley-face emoji. | 天啊 她回复了我一个笑脸表情 |
| [09:05] | She likes me. Us. | 她喜欢我 我们 |
| [09:07] | – Oliver. – Oh. Right. | -奥利弗 -对 |
| [09:08] | I forgot what we were doing for a second. | 我有一瞬间忘了我们在做什么 |
| [09:17] | What are you doing with Franklin’s present? | 你为什么扔掉富兰克林的礼物 |
| [09:19] | You worked so hard on it. | 你为之那么努力 |
| [09:20] | Yeah, that’s the point. | 那就是重点 |
| [09:21] | I worked so hard on his | 我为了他的礼物那么努力 |
| [09:23] | and he didn’t work hard on mine at all. | 但他对我的礼物根本没用心 |
| [09:25] | He wrote me a rap song about his mother’s car. | 他给我写了一首说唱 关于他妈妈的车 |
| [09:29] | I didn’t like it, so he just took off. | 我不喜欢 所以他走了 |
| [09:31] | Honey, sometimes in relationships | 亲爱的 有时候在恋爱关系中 |
| [09:34] | you got to fake it a little bit. | 你需要稍微装一下 |
| [09:36] | Let me show you something. | 我给你看点东西 |
| [09:41] | These are all gifts that your father gave me | 这些都是你父亲送给我 |
| [09:43] | that I cannot stand. | 但我根本搞不懂的东西 |
| [09:45] | Some sonnets written in calligraphy all titled “Katie,” | 一些标题是凯蒂的十四行诗 |
| [09:48] | 26 journals that I will never use, | 26本我永远也不会用的日记 |
| [09:51] | coasters with my kids’ faces on them. | 印有我孩子们的脸的杯垫 |
| [09:52] | We gave you those. | 我们送你的 |
| [09:54] | The point is, he’s a horrible gift giver. | 重点是 他根本不会送礼物 |
| [09:57] | But also a great guy | 但同时也是个很棒的人 |
| [10:00] | who might be the most genuine man I have ever met. | 他可能是我见过的最真诚的人了 |
| [10:05] | I, Randall Stocktin, mail carrier, | 我 兰德尔·斯托克顿 邮递员 |
| [10:08] | am off to ruin a man’s life! | 要去毁掉一个人的人生了 |
| [10:13] | Anyway… | 总之 |
| [10:21] | Nothing like getting your toesees pampered | 辛苦送了一天快递后 |
| [10:22] | after a long day of delivering the mail. | 没什么比按摩脚趾更舒爽了 |
| [10:29] | I still have to take this last one all the way to Westport. | 我还得把这个快递送到西港 |
| [10:32] | Boy, is that town boring and full of idiots, eh? | 老天 那个镇是不是超无聊 还有很多白痴 |
| [10:35] | Sorry, I’m here to enjoy my massage in peace, | 不好意思 我是来安静地享受按摩的 |
| [10:38] | not chit chat with a stranger. | 不是来和陌生人聊天的 |
| [10:40] | Well, let’s get to know each other better | 那我们多多了解彼此吧 |
| [10:42] | so we’re not strangers. | 这样我们就不是陌生人了 |
| [10:43] | My favorite fast track to friendship is admitting secrets. | 我最爱的加速友情升温的方法是吐露秘密 |
| [10:46] | I’ll go first. | 我先来 |
| [10:47] | I open Christmas cards before I deliver them. | 我在送圣诞贺卡前会先打开看 |
| [10:50] | Makes me feel like I have a family. | 让我感觉我也有个家 |
| [10:52] | – Now you go. – Not interested. | -现在轮到你了 -不感兴趣 |
| [10:55] | Come on, it could be anything. | 来嘛 什么都可以 |
| [10:56] | Maybe you enjoy littering. | 或许你喜欢随手扔垃圾 |
| [10:57] | Or, I don’t know, totally random, | 或者 我说不好 可能是巧合 |
| [11:00] | maybe you hate Westport as much as I do. | 或许你跟我一样讨厌西港 |
| [11:02] | What did you say your name was? | 你说你叫什么来着 |
| [11:04] | Randall Stocktin. | 兰德尔·斯托克顿 |
| [11:04] | Well, you know what, Randall? | 好吧 你知道吗 兰德尔 |
| [11:07] | You kind of remind me of somebody. | 你让我想起了一个人 |
| [11:09] | Uh, uh, really? | 真的吗 |
| [11:11] | Who? | 谁 |
| [11:12] | My mother. | 我母亲 |
| [11:13] | She also thinks I care about her thoughts | 她也以为我在乎她的想法 |
| [11:15] | and talks too much. | 还废话太多 |
| [11:17] | Now, if you’ll excuse me, you’ve ruined my massage. | 请恕我失陪 你毁了我的按摩 |
| [11:29] | I love the smell of fresh mail. | 我喜欢新鲜快递的味道 |
| [11:33] | Mail. | 快递 |
| [11:35] | You know what? Tack on an extra fifty for yourself. | 这样吧 多刷五十块作为你的小费 |
| [11:37] | That’s my work card, so I won’t feel it. | 这是我的工作用卡 我也不在乎 |
| [11:41] | Lonnie, that’s a city credit card for town use only. | 朗尼 那是市政府信用卡 只能用在镇里的事上 |
| [11:45] | Bruh, he’s paying for these massages with taxpayer dollars! | 老兄 他在用纳税人的钱给按摩买单 |
| [11:48] | And we got it all on tape! He’s so busted! | 我们都录下来了 他完蛋了 |
| [11:50] | Yeah, he is! | 没错 |
| [11:52] | Alright, I got to bail. I got a 4:30 mammogram. | 好了 我得走了 我约了四点半照乳房X光 |
| [11:56] | I really thought I wanted to be with Andre, | 我真的以为我想和安德烈在一起 |
| [11:58] | but when we went to kiss, something felt off, | 但当我们要接吻时 感觉不对劲 |
| [12:01] | and I-I couldn’t go through with it. | 我亲不下去 |
| [12:02] | Well, you’ve been in a relationship | 你从一上高中开始 |
| [12:04] | – since the beginning of high school. – That’s true. | -就一直在谈恋爱 -没错 |
| [12:06] | Maybe you want a chance to be independent. | 或许你想要一个独立的机会 |
| [12:09] | Do a little self-discovery. Hang out with some girlfriends. | 来点自我发现 和姐妹们玩玩 |
| [12:12] | Find a hobby. Take in a sunset. | 找个爱好 好好享受落日 |
| [12:13] | Wow. That’s actually great advice. | 这真是好棒的建议 |
| [12:15] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [12:16] | I got it from “Eat, Pray, Love.” | 我是从《美食祈祷和恋爱》里学来的 |
| [12:18] | The movie, obviously. | 当然是电影版 |
| [12:20] | Mama don’t read. | 你妈咪不看书 |
| [12:47] | I’m still thinking about that cute checkout girl | 我还在想斯金餐厅 |
| [12:49] | from Stewart and Kingston’s. | 那个收银的可爱女孩 |
| [12:51] | That’s weird. Do I need to tell Dad? | 太奇怪了 我需要告诉爸爸吗 |
| [12:53] | I think you two would hit it off. | 我觉得你们会很谈得来 |
| [12:54] | Mom, stop meddling. I’m not gonna ask her out. | 妈 别再搅合了 我不会约她出去的 |
| [12:56] | You don’t have to, | 你不用这么做 |
| [12:57] | ’cause I did and she’s coming over to hang. | 因为我约了 她会过来玩 |
| [13:00] | Tell me you did not call a girl from my school | 告诉我你没有给我学校的姑娘打电话 |
| [13:01] | and ask her out for me. | 还为了我约她出来 |
| [13:03] | Of course not, that would be crazy. | 当然没有 那太疯狂了 |
| [13:06] | I just used your Instagram account | 我只是用了你的INS账号 |
| [13:07] | and had Tami, J.D., and Walker help me impersonate you. | 并让塔米 JD和沃克帮我装成你 |
| [13:10] | You’ve done some messed up stuff in your time, | 你这辈子做过不少奇奇怪怪的事 |
| [13:12] | but this is borderline psychotic! | 但这个近乎疯狂了 |
| [13:14] | You think? | 真的吗 |
| [13:15] | I literally said I do not need your help! | 我的原话就是我不需要你的帮助 |
| [13:16] | Which is a classic cry for help! | 这是典型的需要帮助的台词啊 |
| [13:18] | All I did was invite a beautiful girl to come over | 我只是邀请了一个美丽的姑娘过来 |
| [13:21] | and possibly make out with you on the couch. | 还可能和你在那个沙发上亲热 |
| [13:23] | I am sorry that I am the greatest wing-woman of all time. | 真抱歉我是史上最棒的把妹搭档 |
| [13:27] | When will you stop meddling in my life?! | 你什么时候会不再干预我的生活 |
| [13:29] | Never. | 永远不会 |
| [13:31] | I’m gonna message Audra right now and call it off. | 我现在发信息奥德拉取消 |
| [13:35] | You can’t, ’cause she’s already here. | 取消不了了 因为她已经到了 |
| [13:40] | Oh, and just a heads up in case she mentions it, | 一个小提醒 如果她提到了 |
| [13:42] | 2018年Nicki Minaj和Cardi B应邀出席同一个派对 期间两人发生口角 后Cardi向Nicki扔了高跟鞋 | |
| [13:42] | in the Nicki-Cardi B fight, you’re team Nicki! | 麻辣鸡和卡迪比撕逼大战中 你挺麻辣鸡 |
| [13:49] | Okay, now you go. | 好 现在轮到你说 |
| [13:51] | I’d marry Pikachu, kiss Lucario, and kill Greninja. | 我会娶皮卡丘 亲路卡利欧 杀了甲贺忍蛙 |
| [13:55] | That is such a good answer. | 这真是个好答案 |
| [13:57] | So, what should we do next? | 那我们接下去干什么 |
| [13:59] | Want to watch a movie? | 想看电影吗 |
| [14:00] | Uh, yeah, sounds good. | 好啊 听着很不错 |
| [14:01] | I actually haven’t seen your favorite movie, | 我其实还没看过你最爱的电影 |
| [14:02] | so do you want to watch that? | 你想一起看吗 |
| [14:04] | Right. My favorite movie. | 对 我最爱的电影 |
| [14:06] | I’d love to show you my favorite movie. | 我非常愿意给你看我最爱的电影 |
| [14:08] | Okay, what did we say his favorite movie was? | 好吧 我们谁说了他最爱的电影 |
| [14:10] | That was me. | 是我 |
| [14:13] | I’m trying to remember where we can stream my favorite movie. | 我在想我们可以去哪看我最爱的电影 |
| [14:16] | Which is obviously… | 显然电影是… |
| [14:22] | …”Little Women.” | 《小妇人》 |
| [14:23] | See, we got this! | 你瞧 我们能行 |
| [14:24] | Why “Little Women”? | 为什么是《小妇人》 |
| [14:25] | J.D. is a big Timothée Chalamet-head. | JD是甜茶提莫西·查拉梅的狂粉 |
| [14:28] | Ah, it’s pronounced Timo-tay, | 其实正确的发音是”提莫忒” |
| [14:29] | and he’s on his way to an Oscar, | 而且他就要获得奥斯卡了 |
| [14:31] | so let’s try to be better, okay? | 所以我们品味高点 好吗 |
| [14:32] | And how funny is it that we have the same favorite snack? | 对了 我们竟然最爱的零食一样 多巧啊 |
| [14:34] | – So funny. – Yeah. | -太巧了 -对 |
| [14:36] | Let me get our favorite snack for us to eat | 我去拿我们最爱的零食 |
| [14:39] | while we watch my favorite movie. | 然后一起看我最爱的电影 |
| [14:40] | That would be my favorite, Hot Cheetos. | 那是我最爱的零食 辣味奇多 |
| [14:44] | But now he’s gonna eat my Cheetos. | 但现在他要吃我的奇多了 |
| [14:45] | Ugh, I didn’t think this through. | 我可能没考虑周全 |
| [14:52] | Oh, he’s so cute. | 它真可爱 |
| [14:54] | Did you get him before or after the loss of Mr. Slytherin? | 你是在斯莱特林先生去世前还是后有了它 |
| [14:59] | Mr. Slytherin? | 斯莱特林先生 |
| [15:00] | – Not it! – Not it! | -不是我 -不是我 |
| [15:01] | – Walker! – Yeah, that was me. | -是沃克 -对 是我说的 |
| [15:03] | Mr. Slytherin is his pet snake that died. | 斯莱特林先生是他的宠物蛇 但已经去世了 |
| [15:05] | It’s good to play the sympathy card. | 打同情牌是很不错的一招 |
| [15:07] | That was taken from my own life by the way, so it’s personal. | 话说这取材于我的个人经历 所以很私人 |
| [15:10] | You’re welcome. | 不客气 |
| [15:13] | Why not get French fries? | 为什么不点薯条 |
| [15:16] | The loss of any living thing is tough. | 失去所有活物都很不容易 |
| [15:19] | I bet. And he died in such an unusual way. | 肯定的 而且它死的如此不寻常 |
| [15:22] | Oh, yeah. It was crazy. | 对 太疯狂了 |
| [15:24] | – Yeah. – I’m still waiting to process it! | -是啊 -我还在等着慢慢消化这事 |
| [15:32] | Why did I just get a DM from you that said, | 为什么我刚收到了你的私信说 |
| [15:35] | “The snake died on a roller coaster”? | “蛇死在了过山车上” |
| [15:38] | What did you do?! | 你干了什么 |
| [15:39] | I popped into the wrong window | 我打开了错误的对话框 |
| [15:41] | and texted her Instagram instead of Oliver. | 发给了她 而不是奥利弗 |
| [15:43] | Oh, this is why the youngest person should handle the phone. | 所以应该由在场最年轻的人拿手机 |
| [15:46] | You’re DMing me right now, | 你现在在给我发私信 |
| [15:48] | but you’re sitting in front of me. | 但你却坐在我面前 |
| [15:50] | What — What is going on? | 怎么 怎么回事 |
| [15:57] | I’m gonna be honest. | 我就实话实说了 |
| [15:58] | My mom’s the one who’s been DMing you. | 是我妈妈一直在私信你 |
| [16:00] | I’ve been DMing your mother?! | 我一直在和你母亲私信 |
| [16:03] | Well, yes. | 这个嘛 没错 |
| [16:05] | And also her best friend and this new guy she just met. | 还有她最好的朋友 还有她刚认识的男人 |
| [16:08] | And some creepy weirdo at Stewart and Kingston’s. | 还有斯金餐厅的一个怪人 |
| [16:10] | Walker?! | 沃克吗 |
| [16:12] | That is seriously messed up! | 这简直太操蛋了 |
| [16:14] | I-I am out of here! | 我走了 |
| [16:16] | Audra, wait! | 奥得拉 等等 |
| [16:17] | I can explain! | 我可以解释 |
| [16:18] | I think. | 我想可以吧 |
| [16:21] | This is where Keith Morrison is gonna stand | 这里就是基斯·莫里森之后站的地方 |
| [16:23] | when he discusses me murdering you on “Dateline.” | 当他为《日界线》节目采访我为什么谋杀你的时候 |
| [16:29] | Audra, I’m so sorry. | 奥德拉 真对不起 |
| [16:31] | I-I swear this was not my idea. | 我发誓这不是我的主意 |
| [16:33] | I was getting over someone | 我刚结束了一段恋情 |
| [16:34] | and my mom gets too involved in my life, | 我妈又太干预我的生活 |
| [16:36] | even when I tell her not to. | 就算我说了不让她这样 |
| [16:39] | But in this case, I’m glad she did, | 但这次 我很高兴她干预了 |
| [16:41] | because if she didn’t, | 因为如果她没有 |
| [16:42] | I wouldn’t have gotten to know you. | 我就没法了解你了 |
| [16:45] | Believe it or not, I can totally relate. | 信不信由你 我能感同身受 |
| [16:48] | – Really? – Yeah. | -真的吗 -对 |
| [16:51] | See that, uh, parked car over there | 看那边 那辆停着的车 |
| [16:54] | with the woman hiding behind the steering wheel? | 里面还有个躲在方向盘后的女人 |
| [16:57] | That’s my mother. | 那是我母亲 |
| [16:58] | Yeah. | 对 |
| [16:59] | Sounds like we already have so much in common. | 听上去我们已经有很多共同点了 |
| [17:04] | Uh, your mom just texted me, | 你妈妈刚给我发了信息 |
| [17:06] | “Make the first move because he won’t.” | “主动点 因为他不会” |
| [17:09] | I’m not wrong! | 我没说错 |
| [17:14] | When are you leaking the Hobert dirt? | 你打算什么时候放出霍巴特的黑料 |
| [17:15] | – Soon. – This is gonna be big. | -很快 -这事肯定很劲爆 |
| [17:17] | Like lose your marriage, live in your car big. | 就像婚姻失败 住在车里这么劲爆 |
| [17:20] | Destroyyyyedd! | 完犊子了 |
| [17:21] | Yeah, that sounds fantastic. | 对 听起来好极了 |
| [17:22] | Are you thinking of backing out? | 你是不想这么做了吗 |
| [17:23] | No, no, I’m not. | 不 不 没有 |
| [17:25] | Yeah, yeah, I am. | 对 是的 |
| [17:26] | You’re just a good guy. | 你就是个好人 |
| [17:27] | That’s just who you are. | 这就是你 |
| [17:29] | It’s not my favorite thing about you, | 这不是我最喜欢你的一点 |
| [17:30] | but it’s not my least favorite. | 但也不是最不喜欢的 |
| [17:32] | – Guess what is. – My pants? | -猜猜最不喜欢的是什么 -我的裤子 |
| [17:33] | Yeah, dawg! | 没错 哥们 |
| [17:38] | Franklin? | 富兰克林 |
| [17:39] | Your mom just told me you were in the hospital. | 你妈妈说你刚才去医院了 |
| [17:41] | Yeah. Sorry for missing your calls. | 对 抱歉没接到你的电话 |
| [17:43] | I had an allergic reaction to the licorice cake. | 我对甘草蛋糕过敏了 |
| [17:46] | Oh, my God! | 天呐 |
| [17:47] | How did you not know you were allergic to licorice? | 你怎么会不知道你对甘草过敏呢 |
| [17:50] | Oh, I knew, but you worked so hard on the cake. | 我知道 但你在那个蛋糕上付出了好多心血 |
| [17:52] | Obviously I’d roll the dice on a near-death experience | 显然我堵了一把 宁愿选了濒死经历 |
| [17:55] | over hurting your feelings. | 也不愿伤害你的感情 |
| [17:56] | That is so sweet. | 你太好了 |
| [17:57] | Is that why you left without saying anything? | 所以你走的时候才什么都没说吗 |
| [18:00] | Yeah, my tongue started swelling pretty quickly. | 对 我的舌头肿得很快 |
| [18:02] | Once it feels like a sweet potato, I know it’s time to jet. | 一旦感觉像个红薯后 我就知道该闪人了 |
| [18:05] | I wish you’d said something. | 我希望你能告诉我 |
| [18:07] | All this whole time, I thought you were mad at me | 一直以来 我以为你在生我的气 |
| [18:08] | because I didn’t like your rap. | 因为我不喜欢你的说唱 |
| [18:10] | I mean, I liked it. | 我是说我喜欢 |
| [18:11] | I just thought for an anniversary gift, | 我只是觉得作为周年礼物 |
| [18:13] | it was…confusing. | 有点…令人困惑 |
| [18:15] | The worst part about choking on my tongue | 舌头肿得让我无法说话 但最糟的是 |
| [18:16] | was that I didn’t get a chance to explain. | 我没机会向你解释 |
| [18:19] | The minivan is where we shared that piece of gum, boo. | 面包车是我们分享口香糖的地方 宝贝 |
| [18:22] | I love that car because it reminds me of you. | 我喜欢那辆车 因为它让我想起你 |
| [18:24] | Oh, man! More bars! | 老天 还有糖果 |
| [18:26] | I’ve got to get back in the studio. | 我得回工作室了 |
| [18:50] | One cheeseburger taco, please. | 一个芝士汉堡玉米煎饼 |
| [18:57] | Trip? | 特里普 |
| [18:59] | Taylor? | 泰勒 |
| [19:00] | What are you doing here? | 你来这干什么 |
| [19:01] | I-I don’t know. | 我不知道 |
| [19:03] | This is kind of our happy place. | 这里有我们美好的回忆 |
| [19:06] | I mean, remember how psyched you were | 还记得你第一次吃到 |
| [19:07] | the first time you had your first cheeseburger taco? | 芝士汉堡玉米煎饼时有多兴奋吗 |
| [19:10] | If the cheeseburger taco could happen, | 如果芝士汉堡玉米煎饼能存在 |
| [19:12] | then anything is possible. | 那一切皆有可能 |
| [19:15] | I really missed you, | 我真的很想你 |
| [19:18] | and through our time apart, I realized | 在我们分开的时间里 我发现 |
| [19:19] | the only person I ever want to be with is you. | 我只想跟你在一起 |
| [19:24] | Break over? | 分手结束 |
| [19:26] | I’m sorry, I actually need a little more time. | 抱歉 我需要更多时间 |
| [19:35] | Okay, that’s enough time. | 好了 时间够了 |
| [19:37] | Break over. | 分手结束 |
| [19:44] | I have to admit, I did enjoy my time alone. | 我不得不承认 我挺享受一个人的时间 |
| [19:47] | I really dug down deep and found myself. | 我下了功夫 发现了自我 |
| [19:49] | Yeah, it was a long afternoon for me too. | 对 那对我来说也是个漫长的下午 |
| [19:53] | Look at that. | 瞧瞧 |
| [19:56] | We made our way back. | 我们和好了 |
| [20:04] | This is the best day ever! | 今天是最好的一天了 |
| [20:17] | I’m sorry for hacking into your account. | 我很抱歉我黑进了你的账户 |
| [20:19] | You should be, because you created a huge mess. | 你确实该抱歉 因为你制造了一个大烂摊子 |
| [20:22] | But I know you were just giving me the nudge I needed | 但我知道你只是必要地推了我一把 |
| [20:24] | to get my confidence back. | 让我找回信心 |
| [20:25] | What I’m hearing is, it all worked out | 我听到的是 一切都解决了 |
| [20:27] | because I got involved. | 全靠我的干预 |
| [20:29] | No, it worked out because she realized | 不 一切都解决了是因为她意识到 |
| [20:30] | what an awesome guy I am. | 我是个超酷的人 |
| [20:32] | There’s my arrogant douchebag. | 我自大臭屁的破儿子又回来了 |
| [20:44] | Hobert decided to drop out of the race. | 霍伯特决定退出竞选了 |
| [20:47] | Look at that! | 你瞧瞧 |
| [20:48] | Justice prevailed and you didn’t even | 正义赢了 你都不需要 |
| [20:50] | have to use that dirt on him. | 用他的黑料对付他 |
| [20:51] | Yeah, he just decided to — | 对 他就这么决定 |
| [20:54] | Lonnie, what did you do? | 朗尼 你干了什么 |
| [20:57] | How dare you, sir. | 你怎么敢指责我 先生 |
| [21:00] | Okay, I just showed Hobert the video and he decided, | 好吧 我只是给霍伯特看了视频 他就决定 |
| [21:02] | all on his own, | 他自己的决定 |
| [21:03] | that it was best for him to drop out of the race, | 他最好退出竞选 |
| [21:05] | which is good for Westport and good for you. | 这对西港和你来说都是好事 |
| [21:08] | And we got to play dress up. | 而且我们可以玩装扮游戏了 |
| [21:10] | There ya go! | 没错 |
| [21:11] | How about we dress up like a couple of 80-year-olds | 不如我们打扮成八十岁的老头 |
| [21:13] | and go take a water aerobics class at the Y? | 去健身房参加水中有氧健身操 |
| [21:15] | I’m not gonna do that. | 我才不这么做 |
| [21:16] | Well, you know where I’ll be. | 那行 反正你知道我在哪 |