| 时间 | 英文 | 中文 |
|---|---|---|
| [00:03] | Well, Mommy Margaret just topped her stovetop scrubbing record. | 玛格丽特妈咪刚刚又破了炉灶面擦洗纪录 |
| [00:06] | Another speed-cleaning challenge in the books. | 又完成一项快速清洗挑战 |
| [00:09] | And all during the twins’ nap time. | 这些都是趁双胞胎睡午觉时完成的哦 |
| [00:12] | So blessed! | 好有福哦 |
| [00:13] | Now let’s go and arrange some flowers. | 接下来我要去插花 |
| [00:15] | Why are you watching that? | 你为什么要看这种视频 |
| [00:17] | I need ideas for the mommy vlog that I’m starting. | 我开的妈咪视频博客需要创意 |
| [00:19] | Mommy Margaret is super-popular, | 玛格丽特妈咪超级火 |
| [00:21] | but, to me, she just looks like | 但在我看来 她看上去就像那种 |
| [00:23] | one of those moms who would murder a kid | 会杀害别人家小孩 |
| [00:24] | so that her daughter could be head cheerleader. | 就为了让自家女儿当拉拉队长的妈妈 |
| [00:26] | Maybe, but she has millions of followers. | 或许吧 但她有几百万粉丝呢 |
| [00:29] | That’s how you get advertisers. | 只有粉丝达到这个级别才有广告主找你 |
| [00:31] | So if you want to be a successful mommy vlogger, | 所以如果你也想当个成功的妈咪视频博主 |
| [00:34] | you better start smiling and acting positive. | 你最好多点微笑 保持乐观的精神 |
| [00:36] | I love being a mom! | 我超爱当妈妈啊 |
| [00:37] | I’ve always hated the words “Thank you,” | 我向来都很讨厌”谢谢你”这个词 |
| [00:39] | and now I never hear them! | 现在我再也听不到了 |
| [00:41] | So blessed! | 好有福哦 |
| [00:42] | Now, keep that positive attitude going | 继续保持这种乐观精神 |
| [00:44] | because I need an SAT tutor. | 因为我需要个高考家教 |
| [00:46] | Absolutely not! We can’t afford it, you Westport turd! | 绝对不行 我们请不起 你个西港粪球 |
| [00:49] | All the kids in town get one. | 城里每个小孩都请了啊 |
| [00:50] | It’s not fair that I have to work harder than everybody else. | 要我比其他人都努力刻苦 这太不公平了 |
| [00:53] | It’s not fair that some kids spend their entire childhood | 有些孩子整个童年时期 |
| [00:55] | fighting off a killer clown, but that’s life! | 都要对抗杀人小丑也不公平啊 但生活就是这样 |
| [00:58] | When will you stop using “It” as a cautionary tale? | 你什么时候能停止把《小丑回魂》当警世故事用 |
| [01:00] | Never! No tutor. | 永远不可能 不能请家教 |
| [01:03] | I’ll still let you on my yacht, because you’re my mother… | 我以后还是会让你上我的游艇的 因为你是我妈 |
| [01:07] | but you will never get to drive. | 但你休想得到驾驶的机会 |
| [01:14] | I’m happy to help you with your assignment if you want. | 如果你愿意 我很乐意帮你完成作业 |
| [01:15] | Ah, no, thanks. It’s my first college paper, | 不了 谢谢 这是我在大学的第一篇论文 |
| [01:17] | and I’m writing it completely on my own. | 我要独立完成 |
| [01:19] | Okay. | 好吧 |
| [01:22] | But in college, the papers are pretty straightforward. | 但在大学 论文是非常直接的东西 |
| [01:25] | Professors aren’t impressed by puffy stickers. | 教授不会因为你贴几张贴纸就给你高分 |
| [01:27] | I have to think of a new ending now! | 我现在不得不重新想结尾了 |
| [01:35] | I admire her ambition, | 我敬佩她的雄心壮志 |
| [01:36] | but if my own daughter | 但如果我的亲闺女 |
| [01:37] | fails her first assignment at the school I teach at | 在我教课的大学里 第一次作业就没通过 |
| [01:40] | and pulled strings to get her into, | 再加上我可是托关系才把她弄进去的 |
| [01:42] | it’s not gonna make me look good. | 那会让我脸上无光 |
| [01:43] | I stopped worrying how Taylor made me look when she decided | 我很早以前就不再担心泰勒会给我长脸还是丢脸了 |
| [01:45] | to potty-train herself in the toilet display at Home Depot. | 从她在家得宝的马桶展览上训练自己上厕所开始就这样了 |
| [01:59] | How am I supposed to figure out my mommy vlog | 我要怎么为我的妈咪视频博客想创意啊 |
| [02:01] | if the two of you – are home sick with mono? | 你们两个都患了接吻病在家 闹哄哄的 |
| [02:03] | Franklin, when is your mother coming back from her spiritual retreat? | 富兰克林 你妈去参加精神修养之旅什么时候回来 |
| [02:05] | Their leader, Bob, says | 他们的领导者鲍勃说 |
| [02:06] | when they’ve been contacted by extraterrestrials | 等外星生命联系他们 |
| [02:08] | or when they run out of ramen. | 或是拉面吃完了就回来 |
| [02:12] | “Attached are this week’s | “附件里是本周 |
| [02:14] | school assignments – for Anna-Kat and Franklin. | 安娜凯特和富兰克林要完成的家庭作业 |
| [02:15] | Please see that they’re completed. Principal Ablin.” | 请确保他们能按时完成 阿布林校长留言” |
| [02:18] | Can’t delete that fast enough. | 删得不够快啊 |
| [02:21] | I’m going to Stewart and Kingston’s. | 我要去一趟斯金餐厅 |
| [02:22] | It’s teacher-conference day at the high school, | 今天高中要开教师大会 |
| [02:24] | so Oliver and Cooper are here if you need anything. | 所以如果你们需要什么 就找奥利弗和库珀 |
| [02:26] | But what about our schoolwork? | 那我们的作业怎么办呢 |
| [02:28] | Fine. I’ll put on educational TV. | 好吧 我给你们看教育频道的节目 |
| [02:33] | “90 Day Fiancé” Is educational? | 《到美国结婚去》是教育性的节目吗 |
| [02:36] | It’s on The Learning Channel. | 这可是学习频道播出的 |
| [02:37] | “Learning” is in the title. | 名字里就有”学习”二字 |
| [02:46] | Things have gotten really tight in here | 自从你把你的夏后秋前阶段 |
| [02:47] | since you had your post-summer, pre-autumn wardrobe delivered. | 专属衣服送了过来 这房间就拥挤不堪了 |
| [02:49] | I need my linen pastels, bromigo. | 我需要我的亚麻粉彩衣服 大兄弟 |
| [02:52] | We’ve outgrown my room. | 我的房间都放不下了 |
| [02:53] | I’m glad you said something. | 我很高兴你开口了 |
| [02:54] | In order to psychologically prepare myself each night, | 每天晚上 我为了做好心理精神 |
| [02:57] | I either pretend I’m on “Survivor” | 要么假装我在参加《幸存者》节目 |
| [02:58] | or in a sad Bolivian prison. | 要么身陷可悲的玻利维亚监狱 |
| [03:03] | You want us to live in your basement? | 你想让我们住在你们家的地下室里 |
| [03:06] | Oh, it’ll need a little fixing up, | 的确需要收拾整理一番 |
| [03:08] | but it’s got an open floor plan, privacy, and… | 但它是开放式的 私密性也足够 并且… |
| [03:11] | A lot of exposed nails. | 很多露在外面的钉子 |
| [03:13] | Don’t be so negative. | 别这么消极嘛 |
| [03:14] | Most people don’t ever get to make use of their tetanus shot. | 绝大多数人都没机会发挥破伤风疫苗的用途 |
| [03:21] | Hear ye, hear ye, hear ye! | 听好 听好 都听好 |
| [03:23] | Vote Greg Otto for City Council! | 请为格雷格·奥图参选市议会投一票 |
| [03:26] | Hang on, Doris. | 等一下 多瑞丝 |
| [03:27] | Whatever it is you’re selling, | 不管你是在卖什么 |
| [03:28] | total stranger who is definitely not my husband, | 绝对不是我丈夫的这位陌生人 |
| [03:31] | I’m not buying it, sir! Good day! | 我是不会买的 先生 再见 |
| [03:33] | I need to collect more signatures | 我需要收集到足够多的签名 |
| [03:34] | to get on the ballot for City Council. | 才能成为市议会的候选人 |
| [03:36] | I’m dressed like this to remind voters | 我穿成这样是为了提醒那些投票人 |
| [03:37] | of my platform to save Bissell’s field from developers. | 我为挽救比塞尔体育馆不被开发商拆掉而做的努力 |
| [03:39] | Well, how many signatures do you have so far today? | 那你今天到目前为止收集到了多少签名 |
| [03:41] | None, but some people promised they’d sign on the way out. | 一个都没有 但有些人说吃完出来时会签的 |
| [03:43] | Well, let me be your first signature of the day. | 那就让我成为你今天的第一个签名者吧 |
| [03:50] | Have fun. | 玩得愉快 |
| [03:51] | Thanks. | 谢谢 |
| [03:52] | “Go home and change. | “赶快回家换衣服吧 |
| [03:53] | You look like the Quaker Oats guy.” | 你看着就像桂格燕麦商标里的那家伙” |
| [03:56] | I can’t figure out what to talk about on my mommy vlog. | 我想不出要在我的妈咪视频博客上聊些什么 |
| [03:59] | Well, what do other vloggers do? | 其他那些博主都聊些什么 |
| [04:00] | It’s mostly parenting hacks. | 大多数都是为人父母的技巧 |
| [04:02] | Like, there’s this woman, Patient Prudence, | 比如有个叫奈心·普鲁登斯的女人 |
| [04:03] | who’s actually not very patient, | 虽然她那个人并没有什么耐心 |
| [04:05] | and I think her husband’s gay, | 我觉得她丈夫是同性恋 |
| [04:06] | but she’s got great snack ideas. | 但她总能想出很棒的点心创意 |
| [04:08] | Oh, I know her. Her videos are awesome. | 我知道她 她的视频棒极了 |
| [04:10] | Why do you watch a mommy vlogger? | 你为什么要看妈咪博主 |
| [04:11] | Oh, I tuned in for her giant cans, | 我是为她的大屁股点进去的 |
| [04:13] | but I actually don’t hate her dessert recipes. | 但我其实并不讨厌她的甜点食谱 |
| [04:15] | Katie, face me out! | 凯蒂 把我转过去 |
| [04:17] | You know it’s rude to eavesdrop on your customers? | 你知道偷听顾客的谈话是很无礼的行为吧 |
| [04:20] | I have to do something to break the boredom of this stupid job, | 这傻兮兮的工作太无聊了 我不得不做点什么 |
| [04:22] | which my parents make me do | 我父母逼迫我做这工作 |
| [04:24] | to get my trust fund. | 只有这样我才能拿到信托基金 |
| [04:25] | I mean, why couldn’t I work at one of their other companies? | 我怎么就不能在他们的其他公司工作呢 |
| [04:27] | They made my brother vice president of their bank | 他们让我弟弟担任他们旗下银行的副行长 |
| [04:30] | all because he went to “College” and has a “Work ethic” | 就因为他上过大学 有职业道德 |
| [04:34] | and isn’t addicted to “OxyContin.” | 且不对奥施康定药物上瘾 |
| [04:36] | I mean, working sucks, | 工作真是太傻逼了 |
| [04:37] | and I am the unluckiest person in the world. | 我是全世界最倒霉的人了 |
| [04:39] | No! You are the most spoiled person in the world. | 不 你是全世界最被宠坏的人 |
| [04:43] | – Whatever. – Yeah, you need a good ass-kicking, dude. | -随便吧 -你需要被人毒打一顿才行 老兄 |
| [04:46] | Any time you wanna scrap, Edna from “The Incredibles,” | 只要你想找人吵架 《超人总动员》里的埃德娜 |
| [04:49] | you know where to find me. | 你知道上哪儿找我 |
| [04:51] | That family could not have survived without her intricate costuming! | 那家人如果没有她高超的制衣技术不可能活下来 |
| [04:55] | Hang on, Doris. | 等一下 多瑞丝 |
| [04:57] | Hello? Principal Ablin? | 喂 阿布林校长 |
| [04:58] | – Busted! – Excuse me? | -被抓包了吧 -什么 |
| [05:00] | I’m busting you via telephone because you deleted | 我要通过电话抓你 以为你删除了 |
| [05:02] | Anna-Kat and Franklin’s school assignments e-mail. | 给安娜凯特和富兰克林的家庭作业邮件 |
| [05:04] | How did you know I did that? | 你是怎么知道我干了这事的 |
| [05:06] | Franklin called and told me. | 富兰克林打电话来告诉我的 |
| [05:07] | Why does Franklin have your number? | 富兰克林怎么会有你的号码 |
| [05:09] | Franklin and I have a standing weekly phone call. | 富兰克林每周都会给我打个电话 |
| [05:11] | Sometimes it’s a video chat. | 有时候是视频聊天 |
| [05:12] | He has a filter that makes him look like a potato. | 他有种滤镜 能将我显示成土豆的样子 |
| [05:15] | We laugh and laugh. | 我们大笑不止 |
| [05:18] | Anyway, I’ve re-sent the assignments. | 总之 我重新发了一封邮件 |
| [05:19] | Make sure they do them. | 请确保他们务必完成 |
| [05:22] | Great. | 这下好了 |
| [05:23] | I have to make sure that the kids do all their schoolwork | 我得确保孩子们生病在家 |
| [05:25] | while they’re home sick. | 也要完成作业了 |
| [05:27] | Well, you were looking for something | 你之前为妈咪播客 |
| [05:28] | to do with them for your mommy vlog. | 找可以和他们一起做的内容 |
| [05:29] | Homeschooling is perfect. | 在家学习这个主题非常好 |
| [05:32] | I could put on a fake smile and pretend to like something. | 我可以虚伪地笑 假装喜欢什么 |
| [05:35] | I sat through all the kids’ recitals without killing myself. | 我坐着听完了所有孩子的独奏会 而没有自杀 |
| [05:37] | That’s basically having your teaching credentials. | 那基本上就是有教师资格证了 |
| [05:39] | The first thing you should teach your mouthy little phone friend | 你该教你那多嘴的电话小朋友的第一件事 |
| [05:42] | is some manners. | 就是礼貌 |
| [05:43] | Hey! Come closer. | 靠近点 |
| [05:45] | Someone needs to spank you. | 你欠扇呢吧 |
| [05:47] | I bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you? | 你肯定想扇吧你 |
| [05:48] | – Oh, maybe I would! – Maybe I’d like it, too. | -也许我想 -也许我会喜欢呢 |
| [05:51] | Maybe I’d like it a lot. | 也许我会很喜欢 |
| [06:01] | – What the hell was that? – I don’t know. | -刚才那算什么 -我不知道 |
| [06:03] | I-It’s a razor-thin line for me between heated and horned up. | 对我来说 愤怒和饥渴只有一线之差 |
| [06:10] | Hello, Internet! | 网上的朋友你们好 |
| [06:11] | Welcome to “Can-Do Katie’s Classroom.” | 欢迎收看《乐观凯蒂的课堂》 |
| [06:13] | Today we are homeschooling. | 今天我们在家学习 |
| [06:15] | Students, please turn to page two in your life-science packets. | 学生们 请翻到生命科学包的第二页 |
| [06:19] | We’re hungry. | 我们饿了 |
| [06:20] | We usually have a snack right before science class, | 一般上科学课之前 我们都会吃零食 |
| [06:23] | and Franklin is dangerously close to a BSE. | 而且富兰克林就快要BSE了 |
| [06:26] | A blood-sugar emergency. | 血糖危机 |
| [06:27] | It starts with crankiness and ends with me throwing elbows | 以任性开始 以乱打架结束 |
| [06:30] | and shouting un-Christian words. | 并伴随着脏话 |
| [06:34] | Hey! I need cooperation for my first “Can-Do Katie” Vlog, okay? | 我第一集《乐观凯蒂》播客需要合作 好吗 |
| [06:38] | So stop busting my hump and do what I say. | 所以别再催我 照我说的做 |
| [06:44] | Now, where were we? | 现在 我们到哪儿了 |
| [06:46] | Snack time! | 零食时间 |
| [06:47] | If I don’t have a Go-Gurt in my hands in two seconds, | 如果我两秒后手里没有酸奶棒 |
| [06:50] | I’m gonna flip out. | 我就要失控了 |
| [06:52] | Okay, so, any good teacher knows how to compromise. | 好吧 所以任何好老师都知道如何妥协 |
| [06:54] | Let’s combine snack time with class time. | 让我们把零食时间和学习时间结合起来 |
| [07:01] | You happy?! Don’t ruin this for me, you little … | 你们高兴了 别给我搞砸了 你们这些… |
| [07:05] | An un-Christian word. | 一句脏话 |
| [07:07] | Sounds like we could all use a snack. | 听起来我们都可以吃点零食 |
| [07:11] | And…we’re back! So, I thought it would be fun | 我们回来了 我觉得会很有趣 |
| [07:13] | to use baking to teach the kids geometry. | 用烘焙来教孩子们几何学 |
| [07:17] | So smart! | 真聪明 |
| [07:18] | Franklin, can you tell me the sum of the internal angles | 富兰克林 你能告诉我一块三角形的饼干 |
| [07:21] | of the triangle-shaped cookie? | 它的内角和是多少吗 |
| [07:24] | 180 degrees. | 180度 |
| [07:26] | Okay! | 好的 |
| [07:27] | As a reward, you get to eat the cookie. | 作为奖励 你可以吃一块饼干 |
| [07:31] | Wait! Mom! He’s allergic to every ingredient in that cookie! | 等等 老妈 他对那块饼干里的所有原料都过敏 |
| [07:34] | How am I supposed to know that? | 我怎么会知道 |
| [07:36] | You’re the teacher. | 你是老师 |
| [07:37] | Don’t you have my medical records? | 你没有我的医疗记录吗 |
| [07:42] | Heart or butt. Your choice, but make it fast. | 心脏还是屁股 你选 但下手快点 |
| [07:49] | How’s homeschool going? | 在家学习进行得如何 |
| [07:51] | Dude, I had to stick two allergy shots into Franklin. | 我给富兰克林扎了两管过敏针 |
| [07:54] | Both times I did, he said, “Yeah, that’s the good stuff.” | 两次他都说了 “不错 那真是好东西” |
| [08:00] | You two are really moving into the basement, huh? | 你们俩真要搬进地下室了 |
| [08:02] | It’s gonna be good for you, Cooper. | 这对你有好处 库珀 |
| [08:03] | It’s about time you slummed it. | 你也该过过苦日子了 |
| [08:04] | Hey! I’ve slummed it. | 我过过苦日子 |
| [08:06] | I once had to bake my own bread. | 我有一次得自己烤面包 |
| [08:08] | We were summering in Umbria. | 我们在翁布里亚过过苦日子 |
| [08:09] | My family owns a small vineyard there, | 我家在那边有个小葡萄园 |
| [08:11] | just a few dozen acres of Sangiovese. | 有几英亩的桑娇维塞[红葡萄品种] |
| [08:14] | What was I talking about again? | 我在说什么来着 |
| [08:16] | Oh, yeah! I made artisanal focaccia! | 对了 我做了手工佛卡夏[一种意大利面包] |
| [08:21] | Oh, good news, Mom. | 好消息 老妈 |
| [08:22] | I found an SAT tutor for only 100 bucks an hour. | 我找到一个每小时仅需100块的高考家教 |
| [08:26] | You’re new to this family every day, it seems. | 看来你对这个家真是毫不了解 |
| [08:28] | This is going to shock you, | 这会让你震惊 |
| [08:30] | but some parents support their children’s dreams. | 但有些家长是会支持他们孩子的梦想的 |
| [08:33] | Your anger only makes me stronger! | 你的怒火只会让我更强壮 |
| [08:37] | Guess what! I got an “A” on my paper! | 猜怎么着 我的论文得了A |
| [08:39] | You did? Really? | 你得了A 真的吗 |
| [08:41] | You got an “A” on a college paper about “Dora the Explorer”? | 你关于《朵拉历险记》的大学论文得了A |
| [08:44] | Sí. | 是的 |
| [08:46] | That means “Yes” in Spanish. | 这是西班牙语的”是的” |
| [08:48] | It was on great thinkers of the 20th century. | 这是对20世纪的伟大思考 |
| [08:50] | The T.A. said it was one of the best papers. | 助教说这是最好的论文之一 |
| [08:52] | Good job, Taylor. | 干得不错 泰勒 |
| [08:54] | Hola. | 你好[西班牙语] |
| [08:56] | What is with your college? | 你的大学怎么回事 |
| [08:58] | Are people also writing PhD dissertations on “SpongeBob SquarePants”? | 人们也在写关于《海绵宝宝》的博士论文吗 |
| [09:01] | This is troubling. I don’t recognize the T.A.’s name. | 这真令人不安 我不认识这个助教 |
| [09:04] | Excuse me. | 稍等下 |
| [09:08] | Oh, damn! He’s fine! | 该死 他挺帅 |
| [09:10] | He’s an 8 at best. | 他最多8分 |
| [09:11] | I’m just saying he’s cute, Taylor’s cute. | 我只是说他很可爱 泰勒很可爱 |
| [09:13] | He probably thinks he has a good shot at her | 他很可能觉得如果他给她高分 |
| [09:14] | if he gives her a good grade. | 他就有机会 |
| [09:17] | Maybe an 8 1/2. I’m just now taking in his smile. | 也许8.5分 我突然接受了他的微笑 |
| [09:20] | Oh, yeah. | 不错 |
| [09:27] | Uh…hello? | 你们好 |
| [09:29] | Hey! You must be Ms. Otto. | 你一定是奥图太太了 |
| [09:30] | I am. Who are you? | 我是 你们是谁 |
| [09:32] | Oh, Cooper Bradford hired us to remodel the basement. | 库珀·布拉德福德雇我们来改造地下室 |
| [09:34] | – Since when? – We’ve been here for the last three nights. | -从什么时候开始 -我们三晚前就在这儿了 |
| [09:37] | I haven’t heard a thing. | 我什么都没听见 |
| [09:37] | – We soundproofed it. – Oh! Good! | -我们做了隔音 -好极了 |
| [09:40] | So you won’t hear their screams | 所以等我下楼去掐死他们俩 |
| [09:41] | when I go downstairs and throttle them. | 你们也不会听到他们的惨叫 |
| [09:45] | Oliver, Cooper! Just talked to your friends upstairs! | 奥利弗 库珀 刚和你们楼上的朋友聊了聊 |
| [09:48] | And you are in a lot of troub-le — Oh…my God! | 你们麻烦大了 天啊 |
| [09:54] | I am underdressed for my basement. | 我来地下室穿得太随便了 |
| [09:57] | How great is this place? | 这个地方太棒了 |
| [09:58] | The whole reason I agreed to let you live down here | 我同意你们住在地下室的唯一原因 |
| [10:01] | was because the basement was crap. | 就是地下室很烂 |
| [10:03] | You’re supposed to be growing as people. | 你们本该作为人而成长 |
| [10:05] | Yeah, we were planning on it, | 是的 我们本来是这样计划的 |
| [10:06] | but then Oliver reminded me that I’m really rich. | 但奥利弗提醒我 我非常有钱 |
| [10:09] | Cooper, that is not how the Ottos live. | 库珀 奥图家人们不这样生活 |
| [10:11] | We work for what we have, | 我们为所有的而努力 |
| [10:12] | and that’s why we appreciate it more. | 因此我们才会更心存感激 |
| [10:14] | Well, I didn’t work for these cashmere pillows, | 我没有为这些开司米抱枕而努力过 |
| [10:16] | and I’m appreciating the hell out of them. | 但我感激得心都要出来了 |
| [10:17] | That is because you are corrupted! | 这是因为你已经堕落了 |
| [10:19] | Oh. My. | 天啊 |
| [10:22] | I don’t know what they had to kill to make this, | 我不懂他们为了做这个得杀掉什么 |
| [10:24] | but it was worth it. | 但绝对值得 |
| [10:28] | I am not cool with this. | 我对此很不满意 |
| [10:34] | This is mine now. | 现在这是我的了 |
| [10:39] | Did you see the basement? | 你看到地下室了吗 |
| [10:40] | Yes! I think it’s outrageous. | 看到了 太不像话了 |
| [10:41] | I think it sets a bad example for our son, | 我觉得这给我们儿子树立了坏榜样 |
| [10:43] | and I think I might use their sauna when they’re not around. | 而且我可能会趁他们不在 偷用他们的桑拿房 |
| [10:50] | Honey, we have to talk to you about something. | 亲爱的 我们得跟你谈谈 |
| [10:53] | You’re in college now, honey. | 你现在上大学了 亲爱的 |
| [10:54] | Oh, crap. A double “Honey.” | 糟了 双重”亲爱的” |
| [10:56] | It’s just your mother and I are a little skeptical | 只是我和你妈有点怀疑 |
| [10:58] | that your T.A., Andre, gave you that “A” | 你的助教安德烈给了你A |
| [11:00] | because he felt like it was a good paper. | 只是因为他觉得那是篇好论文 |
| [11:01] | Why else would he give me an “A”? | 他还能因为什么给我A |
| [11:03] | Well, when I was in college, I also had a pervy T.A. | 我上大学时 也有个下流的助教 |
| [11:06] | who gave me good grades because I was cute. | 他给我好成绩 是因为我很可爱 |
| [11:08] | Unfortunately, your mom is right. | 不幸的是 你妈说得没错 |
| [11:09] | I gave her a better grade than she deserved | 我给了她得不到的好成绩 |
| [11:10] | because I wanted to go out with her. | 因为我想和她约会 |
| [11:11] | He changed a “B” to an “A” because of these D’s. | 他因为这对D 把B改成了A |
| [11:14] | I can’t believe this! | 我简直不敢相信 |
| [11:15] | You don’t think I’m capable of getting an “A,” | 你们觉得我没能力得A |
| [11:17] | even though I worked really hard and wrote a great paper! | 尽管我非常努力 并且写了篇很棒的论文 |
| [11:19] | This is so insulting! Now please leave my room…honey! | 太侮辱人了 现在请离开我的房间 “亲爱的” |
| [11:24] | Now that I hear it, it is patronizing. | 现在我听着 确实很高人一等 |
| [11:31] | Photosynthesis is when plants turn… | 光合作用就是当植物 |
| [11:33] | carbon dioxide into oxygen. | 把二氧化碳转化为氧气 |
| [11:36] | And which continent has the Sahara Desert? | 撒哈拉沙漠在哪个洲 |
| [11:39] | Anna-Kat? | 安娜凯特 |
| [11:42] | That’s right! | 没错 |
| [11:43] | And you carry the 1, and you’re on your way! | 你加上1 就离正确答案不远了 |
| [11:46] | Easy! | 简单 |
| [11:49] | This is Can-Do Katie | 这里是乐观凯蒂 |
| [11:50] | reminding you that you’re a mommy and you can do it! | 提醒你你是位母亲 而且你能做到 |
| [11:55] | What do you think? So good, right? | 你觉得如何 非常棒是不是 |
| [11:58] | It’s not you at all. I don’t know if I like it. | 这根本不是你 我说不好我喜不喜欢 |
| [12:01] | Well, you know who does like it? | 你知道谁喜欢吗 |
| [12:02] | Gentle Ginny of “Gentle Ginny’s Bubble Bath.” | 《温柔金妮的泡泡浴》的温柔金妮 |
| [12:05] | She reached out and wants to sponsor my mommy vlog. | 她找我 想赞助我的妈咪视频 |
| [12:08] | Why can’t you just be yourself? | 你为什么不能做自己 |
| [12:10] | Nobody’s interested in the real me. | 没人对真正的我感兴趣 |
| [12:11] | They want perky and positive. | 他们想要自信积极的 |
| [12:13] | My brand is more cranky and vengeful. | 而我更暴躁 报复心重 |
| [12:15] | – It’s not for everyone. – I like it. | -不适合所有人 -我喜欢 |
| [12:16] | Well, that’s because your brand is taking abuse with a smile. | 因为你就是喜欢笑着受虐 |
| [12:19] | That’s why we work, baby. | 所以我们这么合适 宝贝 |
| [12:21] | How’d it go with the signatures? | 签名收集得怎么样 |
| [12:22] | Oh, I only got seven so far, | 我现在只收集到了七个 |
| [12:23] | six from people in the Historical Guild | 六个是历史协会的 |
| [12:25] | and one from a “Harry Azcrac.” | 还有一个叫茂匹古[谐音”毛屁股”] |
| [12:29] | Classic. | 真经典 |
| [12:30] | What? | 什么 |
| [12:31] | Oh, sweetie. | 亲爱的 |
| [12:37] | Hello, fellow mommies! Today… | 各位妈咪们好 今天… |
| [12:40] | Guys, I told you I don’t want to have to edit around | 你们俩 我说了我不想再剪辑 |
| [12:43] | you goofing off anymore! | 你们开小差 |
| [12:45] | Alright. Let’s try this again. | 好了 我们再试一次 |
| [12:54] | Hello, fellow mommies! Today… | 各位妈咪们好 今天… |
| [12:58] | Are you seriously passing a note right in front of me?! | 你们是真的在我眼皮底下传纸条吗 |
| [13:02] | “I know she’s your mom, but our teacher blows chunks.” | “我知道她是你妈妈 但我们的老师好差劲” |
| [13:06] | Teachers should be paid a billion dollars a day. | 老师们应该一天赚十亿 |
| [13:10] | And you know who should be paid more? | 你知道谁应该拿更多钱吗 |
| [13:11] | Moms! Because it is a horrible job. | 妈妈们 因为这是个糟透了的工作 |
| [13:14] | Name one other job that you have to | 你们说还有什么工作 |
| [13:15] | take your annoying employees on vacation with you. | 你需要带烦人的员工们一起去度假 |
| [13:20] | I mean, come on! Motherhood is the worst! | 我是说 拜托 做母亲最差劲了 |
| [13:22] | It’s best described as | 最形象的描述就是 |
| [13:23] | having a bowling ball being ripped out of your hoo-ha | 从你的不可描述部位扯出一个保龄球 |
| [13:26] | and then getting hit over the head with it for the rest of your life! | 而你的余生都在被这颗保龄球砸头 |
| [13:30] | Hoo! That felt good! | 呼 太爽了 |
| [13:32] | Okay. Now that I got that out, | 好了 现在我释放完了 |
| [13:34] | I’ve got to delete it and start over. | 我得删掉重新开始了 |
| [13:41] | I don’t think she meant to post that. Should we tell her? | 我觉得她没想发布出去 我们该告诉她吗 |
| [13:44] | If there’s anything I’ve learned from Bob, | 如果说我从鲍勃身上学到了什么 |
| [13:46] | the leader of my mom’s church — | 也就是我妈妈教堂的领导 |
| [13:47] | don’t interfere with fate and let sleeping dogs lie. | 那就是别干涉命运 别打搅睡觉的狗 |
| [13:50] | He trained them to attack anyone who tried to leave the compound. | 他把它们训练得去攻击所有想离开教堂的人 |
| [14:01] | I just heard from Gentle Ginny. | 我刚和温柔金妮聊过 |
| [14:03] | She doesn’t want to sponsor my vlog anymore. | 她不想继续赞助我的视频了 |
| [14:06] | Apparently, instead of deleting my meltdown, I posted it. | 显然 我非但没有删掉我的崩溃 还发布了 |
| [14:11] | Well, at least you were being you, | 至少你做了自己 |
| [14:12] | and if they don’t like it, screw ’em. | 如果他们不喜欢 去他们的 |
| [14:19] | Oh, hey. You’re that schmuck who stands outside | 你就是那个穿得像桂格燕麦 |
| [14:22] | Stewart and Kingston’s dressed like the, uh, Quaker Oats guy. | 站在斯金餐厅外边的蠢货 |
| [14:25] | It’s a Revolutionary War uniform! | 那是独立战争的制服 |
| [14:27] | How is that better? | 这好在哪里 |
| [14:29] | Hey, Walker. Thanks for coming by. | 沃克 谢谢你过来 |
| [14:31] | Okay, but don’t forget our deal — I do this for you, | 没问题 但别忘了我们的交易 我帮你做这个 |
| [14:33] | you don’t rat me out to the manager. | 你不向经理告我的状 |
| [14:35] | I don’t need him telling my parents | 我不需要他告诉我父母 |
| [14:36] | that I sneak four peach muffins a day. | 我每天偷拿四个桃子松饼 |
| [14:40] | I promised them I wouldn’t steal | 我答应他们不再偷了 |
| [14:41] | or sit outside that girl’s house anymore. | 也不再坐在那女孩房子外了 |
| [14:45] | – Why is he here? – I want him to talk to the boys | -他怎么来了 -我想让他和男孩们聊聊 |
| [14:47] | and teach them a lesson about values. | 教教他们价值观 |
| [14:50] | Come on, Walker. | 来吧 沃克 |
| [14:52] | You sure you don’t want interior-design ideas | 你确定不需要室内设计 |
| [14:54] | to make your house look less terrible? I’m kidding. | 来让你们的房子更糟吗 我开玩笑的 |
| [14:56] | Although this house is terrible. | 尽管这所房子确实糟透了 |
| [15:02] | Cooper, Oliver, I want you to meet Walker. | 库珀 奥利弗 我想让你们见见沃克 |
| [15:05] | He is a 40-something trust-fund kid | 他是个有信托基金的40多岁的孩子 |
| [15:06] | with no ambition and no life skills | 没有任何野心和生活技能 |
| [15:08] | because he’s been handed everything without earning it. | 因为他不需要努力就得到了一切 |
| [15:11] | Strong intro. ‘Sup, fellas? | 介绍很猛啊 你们好 |
| [15:14] | Oliver, who’s this? | 奥利弗 这是谁 |
| [15:15] | – My SAT tutor. – I said no tutor! | -我的高考家教 -我说了不请家教 |
| [15:17] | I thought you didn’t want to pay for one. | 我以为是因为你不想付钱 |
| [15:18] | And now you don’t have to. Cooper’s gonna cover it. | 而现在你不用了 库珀会付的 |
| [15:20] | You can’t just keep using money that’s not yours. | 你不能一直用不属于你的钱 |
| [15:23] | And it’s not yours, either. | 而且也不是你的 |
| [15:24] | If you keep sponging off your mom and dad, | 如果你一直从你父母那白吃白拿 |
| [15:26] | then Walker here is your future. | 那沃克就是将来的你 |
| [15:29] | And it’s rough, bud. | 很艰难 兄弟 |
| [15:30] | Walker? Is that you? | 沃克 是你吗 |
| [15:33] | You know him? | 你认识他 |
| [15:34] | I tutored him for six years when he was in high school. | 他上高中时 我指导了他六年 |
| [15:36] | I developed a tic and a dependency on Xanax. | 我得了面部抽搐 并对镇定剂上瘾 |
| [15:39] | Oh, hey, Roberta! | 嘿 萝贝塔 |
| [15:40] | I’m sorry about your face and drug addiction. | 我对你的脸和药物成瘾感到抱歉 |
| [15:43] | Wait. You’re Walker Montgomery, right? | 等等 你是沃克·蒙哥马利吧 |
| [15:45] | I think our parents know each other. | 我们父母好像认识 |
| [15:47] | Yeah, um, actually… | 是啊 其实… |
| [15:49] | they are yachting together in the Mediterranean right now. | 现在他们一起在地中海的游艇上玩 |
| [15:52] | Corsica is so awesome this time of year. | 每年这个时候的科西嘉岛都很棒 |
| [15:54] | – So much better than Saint-Tropez. – So much better. | -比圣特罗佩强多了 -强太多了 |
| [15:56] | – Right? – Walker! | -是吧 -沃克 |
| [15:57] | You are here to tell Cooper | 你是来这告诉库珀 |
| [15:58] | that relying on your parents’ money | 依靠父母的钱 |
| [16:00] | turns you into a shell of a human, like you are now. | 就会想现在的你一样 活成一具空壳 |
| [16:02] | Yeah, sure, but first, uh, the reason I’m here — | 是的没错 但首先 我来这是为了 |
| [16:05] | Coops, could you tell your parents to tell my parents | 小库 你能让你爸妈告诉我爸妈 |
| [16:08] | that I have been working super hard at Stewart and Kingston’s | 我在斯金店一直非常努力的工作 |
| [16:11] | and they should just let me stop working there to get my trust fund? | 他们不该让我在那工作才给我信托基金 |
| [16:13] | – Sure thing, dude. – Sweet. | -没问题 兄弟 -很好 |
| [16:15] | No! I brought you here to tell them how pathetic you are! | 不 我带你来是为了告诉他们你有多可悲 |
| [16:18] | Mom, he’s just being smart. | 妈 他的做法很聪明啊 |
| [16:20] | He knows the trust-fund route is the way to go, | 他知道他得拿到信托基金 |
| [16:22] | and he’s doing everything he can to keep it going. | 他也想方设法努力争取了 |
| [16:24] | See? He’s right. I am resourceful. | 看吧 他说得对 我太机智了 |
| [16:26] | And if this doesn’t work, | 如果这个方法没用 |
| [16:28] | I’m planning on – having myself kidnapped. | 我打算绑架我自己 |
| [16:30] | This was a real eye-opener, Mom. | 这可真是开了眼界了 妈妈 |
| [16:32] | Walker, out! | 沃克 出去 |
| [16:33] | Uh, not before I school these two chumps | 走之前我要先教教这两个傻瓜 |
| [16:36] | in “Seal Force Delta.” | 怎么玩《海豹三角洲部队》 |
| [16:41] | You got a Xanax, Roberta? | 你有镇定剂吗 萝贝塔 |
| [16:48] | Did you give me an “A” On my paper | 你给我的论文评了”A” |
| [16:49] | because you think I’m hot? | 是不是因为你觉得我很性感 |
| [16:51] | I’m sorry? | 不好意思 |
| [16:52] | If I didn’t earn the grade fair and square, I want to know about it. | 如果这个成绩不是我堂堂正正得来的 我要知道 |
| [16:54] | Uh, Taylor. | 泰勒 |
| [16:56] | I-I can promise you that | 我可以向你保证 |
| [16:58] | despite the improper formatting and numerous misspellings — | 虽然格式不当 错别字也不少 |
| [17:02] | it appears autocorrect was no match for you… | 看来电脑的自动更正都被你打败了… |
| [17:06] | …your unique take on the assignment really did earn you an “A.” | 是你对这个作业的独特想法 让你得了”A” |
| [17:08] | And it had nothing to do with my looks? | 和我的外表毫无关系吗 |
| [17:10] | Listen. Everybody writes about Gandhi or Einstein. | 听着 每个人都写甘地或者爱因斯坦 |
| [17:15] | Nonviolent resistance. Smart at math. We get it. | 非暴力抵抗 善于数学 这种我们都知道 |
| [17:19] | Okay, but choosing to write about “Dora the Explorer,” | 但你选择写《朵拉历险记》 |
| [17:22] | that shows you’re an independent thinker. | 说明你是个会独立思考的人 |
| [17:24] | Yeah, you know, I always try to live my life like Dora. | 是啊 我一直试着像朵拉那样生活 |
| [17:27] | Be adventurous, speak a little Spanish, | 敢于冒险 说一点西语 |
| [17:29] | and never, ever swipe. | 永远不捣蛋[朵拉剧中对捣蛋鬼狐狸说的话] |
| [17:32] | And always have a… | 总是背着一个… |
| [17:33] | Backpack, backpack | 双肩包 双肩包 |
| [17:34] | Hey! | 是啊 |
| [17:36] | You’re unlike any student I’ve ever had before. | 你和我之前教过的学生都不一样 |
| [17:41] | Um, no one’s ever disputed an “A.” | 从来没有人得了”A”还来争论 |
| [17:44] | I didn’t want it if I didn’t earn it. | 如果不是我应得的我就不要 |
| [17:46] | Well, I’d never give you an “A” | 我不会因为你长得漂亮 |
| [17:46] | just because I thought you were cute. | 就给你”A”的 |
| [17:48] | I mean, it’s not that I don’t think you’re cute. | 我不是说我不觉得你长得漂亮 |
| [17:49] | You are very cute… | 你非常漂亮… |
| [17:51] | is something that I would never say as your T.A. | 这种话作为你的助教是不会说的 |
| [17:55] | I just thought I’d give you an example | 我只是想举个例子 |
| [17:57] | of something a T.A. Shouldn’t say. | 告诉你什么话是助教不该说的 |
| [18:00] | I’ll see you around. | 那我们回见 |
| [18:02] | Not if I see you first. | 说不定我会先见你 |
| [18:04] | And that’s an example of something no one should ever say. | 这句话就是不该说的例子 |
| [18:17] | Walker, your phone’s ringing. | 沃克 你的电话响了 |
| [18:21] | It says “Mommy”? | 上面显示”妈咪” |
| [18:24] | Hi, hi, hi! | 喂 喂 喂 |
| [18:26] | What? What? Now?! | 什么 什么 现在吗 |
| [18:28] | Can’t she wait an hour?! I’m with my friends! | 不能让它等一个小时吗 我和朋友在一起 |
| [18:32] | You never understand! | 你从来都不理解我 |
| [18:35] | Fine. | 好吧 |
| [18:38] | Gotta bail, dudes. | 我得走了 兄弟们 |
| [18:39] | I got to pick up Marsha from school. | 我要接玛莎放学 |
| [18:43] | Is that your daughter? | 是你的女儿吗 |
| [18:43] | No, Marsha’s my parents’ show Poodle. | 不是 玛莎是我爸妈的展示贵宾犬 |
| [18:46] | She’s at agility training | 它在做敏捷训练 |
| [18:47] | and has a pedi-pedi appointment right now. | 现在有个美甲预约 |
| [18:49] | Can we at least finish the game first? | 我们至少可以玩完这局吧 |
| [18:50] | Sorry, bruh. | 对不起 兄弟 |
| [18:52] | When my parents – say do something, I gotta do it. | 我爸妈吩咐我做什么 我就得去做 |
| [18:55] | They control the money faucet. You’ll see one day, Coops. | 他们控制着钱呢 你以后就明白了 小库 |
| [19:02] | Cooper, I’m begging you. Don’t. | 库珀 我求你了 不要 |
| [19:04] | I don’t want to be a prisoner to my parents’ money anymore. | 我不想成为我爸妈财产的阶下囚 |
| [19:07] | Don’t do this! | 别这么做 |
| [19:07] | So I’m officially handing over my credit cards to you. | 所以我正式把我的信用卡交给你 |
| [19:10] | Wow! I’m proud of you, Cooper! | 我为你骄傲 库珀 |
| [19:14] | He rips my heart out, and you praise him?! | 他让我伤心欲绝 你还赞美他 |
| [19:16] | I need to start learning how to take care of myself. | 我得开始学着怎么照顾自己了 |
| [19:18] | What about my SAT tutor? | 那我的高考辅导老师怎么办 |
| [19:19] | You’re just gonna have to study hard and do it on your own. | 你只能努力学习 靠你自己了 |
| [19:22] | I know you can. You’re muy intelligente. | 我知道你行的 你很聪明 |
| [19:24] | This is madness. | 真是疯了 |
| [19:25] | You’ve gone through a lot of personal growth | 自从你搬到这来 |
| [19:27] | since you’ve moved in here, and it disgusts me. | 你成长了许多 这让我恶心 |
| [19:30] | I guess I’m one step closer to becoming an Otto. | 我想我更像奥图家的一员了 |
| [19:33] | I have never heard that line said proudly before. | 我从来没听过有人用骄傲的语气说那句话 |
| [19:40] | Time to delete Can-Do Katie’s mommy vlog. | 是时候删掉乐观妈咪凯蒂的视频博客了 |
| [19:43] | Hey, wait. There’s a lot of comments on there. | 等等 这里有好多评论 |
| [19:46] | “Great video, Katie. | “很好的视频 凯蒂 |
| [19:47] | Thank you for showing what it’s really like to be a mother.” | 谢谢你向大家展示一位母亲的真实生活” |
| [19:49] | “All the other mommy vlogs | “其他的妈咪视频博客 |
| [19:51] | make me feel bad about myself.” | 都会让我觉得挫败” |
| [19:52] | “Finally, the truth about motherhood! | “终于 这才是做母亲的真相 |
| [19:55] | It’s messy and frustrating.” | 混乱又沮丧” |
| [19:57] | There’s so many of them. | 好多评论啊 |
| [19:58] | So, I guess there are people out there who like you for you. | 所以 还是有人喜欢你做自己的样子的 |
| [20:02] | I guess I’ll keep my vlog. | 我要保留我的博客了 |
| [20:05] | But now, instead of “Can-Do Katie,” | 但现在 不叫”乐观凯蒂” |
| [20:07] | it’ll be called… | 要叫… |
| [20:11] | I got it. “A Real Mother.” | 我想到了 “一位真正的母亲” |
| [20:13] | You know, when people say “A real mother,” | 你知道吗 人们说”一位真正的母亲”的时候 |
| [20:17] | – it sort of insinuates — – What?! | -会带点讽刺意味 -什么 |
| [20:20] | Nothing. – Works for you either way. | 没事 两种说法都符合你 |
| [20:25] | “Harry Azcrac.” | “毛屁股” |
| [20:27] | I get it now. | 我现在懂了 |
| [20:28] | I knew you would. | 我就知道你会懂的 |
| [20:34] | So, I talked to Andre today. | 我今天找安德烈谈了 |
| [20:35] | He said I earned my “A” fair and square. | 他说这个”A”是我应得的 |
| [20:37] | We know. We both read your paper, and it was really great. | 我们知道 我们都读了你的论文 写得非常好 |
| [20:39] | And just like Dad told me, | 就像爸爸跟我说的 |
| [20:40] | you were true to yourself, and it paid off. | 你忠于自己 也因此得到回报 |
| [20:43] | Good night. | 晚安 |
| [20:44] | Everyone’s doing great being themselves, except me. | 每个人都能很好地做自己 除了我 |
| [20:47] | I’m being myself, | 我做我自己 |
| [20:47] | and I can’t even get more than six City Council signatures. | 最多就能得到6个市政厅签名 |
| [20:50] | That’s because it’s politics, | 因为这是政治活动 |
| [20:51] | the one place where being yourself is a negative. | 是唯一一种做自己会吃亏的事情 |
| [20:54] | No one cares about this field you want to save. | 没有人在乎你想保护的那个牧场 |
| [20:56] | If you want to get elected, | 如果你想被选上 |
| [20:57] | you have to act like someone in Westport | 你就要像个西港人一样 |
| [20:59] | that people can relate to. | 让人们产生共鸣 |
| [21:00] | Who’s someone they can relate to? | 人们会对什么人产生共鸣 |
| [21:01] | A complete and total D-bag. | 一个彻头彻尾的混蛋 |
| [21:08] | Vote Greg Otto for City Council! | 请给市议员竞选者 格雷格·奥图投票 |
| [21:10] | What do I stand for? | 我支持什么呢 |
| [21:11] | Green juice! | 蔬菜汁 |
| [21:13] | Labradoodles! | 拉布拉多 |
| [21:17] | Refunds on bad facelifts! | 给失败的除皱手术退款 |